Bye nvm bro
Boi
what even is that?
I really believe in providing books to underprivileged chimpanzees They're just ao sad and uneducated
That's super impressive I think you're cute
Thats gay
oof you right Okay but listen chimps are pretty much are family and you're looking out for our family That's so thoughful of you *thoughtful
Im sorry, but i did not descend from some ape
you don't believe in evolution? Hey how do you feel about pizza rockets?
If I considered an ape to be my family, then I would have to consider all people my family Pizza rockets? What the heck are those? Like to deliver pizza?
Oof that's true. People are gross and ape like sometimes
Sounds expensive
I mean we all came from adam and eve lol
Why use a ricket? *rocket
Rickets are cool
Oh yeah, gotta love rickets
No like a rocket made out of pizza think about it
Hmmm...
Pizza rockets
Hmmmmmm Sounds like a bad idea
you're hanging with the bois on a saturday night no listen you and the bois saturday night
Is there cold ones?
You guys get hungry what do you do ?
I eat ine of the bois
There could be like dessert pizzas What's ine
Dessert pizza?
Like cookie pizzas
That sounds terrible
Dude they're really good
I prefer real pizza
like a nice pizza with like oreo creme with oreo cookies for toppings
Meaty cheesy pizza
Real pizza is good too
Ooey gooey delicious pizza
Meat and cheese pizza is the way to go
Not no gross cookies
That's the best kind of pizza you don't like cookies?
Thats diabetes-licious
HAHAHA LOL You're so funny that's so true
I have diabetus Type 3
Diabetes tastes good
Stage 4 diabetes
type 3 stage 4 diabetes?
Its pretty severe
Did you drink child sized sodas as young boi?
Yep, literal child size sodas
Wow that's a lot of sugar
Along with lard straight from the bucket
I hate to be rude are you in the upper weight catergory? Oh myyy you have lived a very healthy life style
No, i only weight like 600 pounds My mom says Im skinny
Pfft you're like a small elephant Your mom... Poor her that must've been a very painful exit How is your mom?
Actually, my doctor said I weight as much as a medium hippo
Oof your doctor called you fat capital PHat
She's sad, since i tried sitting on her lap and broke both of her femurs
you broke your mom!
And a few vertebrae
Oh my goodness and was she treated by the same doctor who called you a medium sized hippo?
And ruptured her spleen
my man you aren't a man anymore. You're a freaking a boulder Dude if we pushed you down a hill you could flatten everything
No, he quit since I ruined his career as a weight loss doctor when I only gained weight from his diets
Let's hike the Y and see what happens ;)
Sorry, i want to stay chaste Want your hands
Chaste? Bro i think you need to stay chased and lose weight
*watch
Oh man you're insane
Um, im pretty sure God loves me just how I am
Have you ever seen austin powers? You and all your curvacious curves lol
I dont need to change for you Yeah, why Austin Powers?
Well change is good Okay so in Austin Powers there is a man this man is scottish a very nice scotish man who weighs the same as a hippo
I relate more to doctor evil Hes pretty much my hero I want to be just like him someday
He's a genius
Although I am scottish
you know hold the world hostage for a billion dollars it's a solid plan
No, one million dollars
Hold up are you actually scottish? HAha the plan is completely fool proof
Yeah, my second cousins wear kilts Or maybe their my second uncles
oooh that's super cool actually
Traditional scottish people didnt wear anything under their kilts
How immersed in the scottish culture are you?
Sounds nice, i think ill try it I just have to keep my legs crossed when I sit down
traditionally yeah that's true.
Its kinda hard since I weigh 600 pounds though
Or you can let the breeze of the winds flap the sack Or wave the flag Oh yeah i forgot you were fat
See you wouldnt even know it
Do you feel that it has shaped who you are today? That's true
Yeah, i feel a lot more well-rounded now
Oohh oh man I see what you did ther there
I used to have 2% body fat and be a professional bodybuilding
I dig it that was clever. It was funny and I'm proud to call you my fat friend
But my bulk session never ended
and now you only have 2% muscle The grind never stops bro. NEVER STOPS
It does when you sleep 18 hours a day
And weigh 601 pounds
And eat a minimum of 20 twinkies daily
Of 20 twinkies! I am going to win this free mac
Only a minimum, its usually closer to 50
I am determined to succeed
Yeah right You'll never succeed
dallin is a cutie Hey my man
He's gay, he probably has to write a subpoena article on Trump
Dallin my roommate is having troube;l/nlk'sohfas sorry I had a spasm right there Nothing
A spasm?
Just pretend like there is nothing there
You should go to a doctor Try electroshock therapy, it really helps
yeah every now and then I get these mini strokes and it causes my arms to spasm out of control. It's not healthy
Or lobotomies, those are good too Ive had both Twoce each
I'm doing cryo therapy right now actually Lobotomies? EWWWWWWW That sucks
Only old fashioned ones Those are the best
old fashioned one? What does that mean?
Gotta love ice picks in your eye socket
Take  out pieces of the brain?
No Allen Geinsburg
Eww you're freaky Who's Allen Geinsburg?
Thats what girls say, amiright?
ewwwwwww you're nasty
Girls say that too my dude
ayye essketit
No
This was fun
Never ever say that Bye