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Warranty Now Void v5

The world is falling apart. Things are getting weird, bad, weirdly bad, and badly weird. We simply couldn't stand by and watch this happen without doing something. And so we brought this website back into existence with the explicit purpose of hurrying that process along.



  • node/npm (only if enabling vibrant-posts or using tools, see below sections)
  • ruby/gem (sudo apt-get install ruby ruby-dev)
  • bundler (sudo gem install bundler)
  • ImageMagick (only if enabling generate-thumbnails, see below):



Create a directory at the project root named .bundle with a file inside named config (no extension, no dot), add the vendor prefix settings for bundler:

BUNDLE_PATH: ".vendor/bundle"

This will install all the ruby stuff into a local directory .vendor/bundle inside the project instead of trying to install into system ruby and getting messy with permissions.


Edit the _config.yml file to your preferred settings, these are likely the ones you'll want to change:


This will be used to generate all the urls and paths across the site, so if you want anything to work, you'll need to set this to your machine. If you only plan on using it locally, localhost or is fine, but if you want it accessible inside your network, you'll need to use a hostname or local IP.

host: my-computer.local


This key decides whether to do the color extraction for every post, which is extremely slow (like, adds a full minute to the build time). If you're doing something locally and don't care about the colors, set this to false.


This defines options for the preview-thumbnails-generator plugin, specifically enabled defining whether to run it or not. When building locally and not for deployment, you likely want to disable this, so you don't have to worry about having ImageMagick and the RMagick gem installed, and to avoid the about 35 seconds it adds to the build.


Only one dependency needs to be manually installed (only needed if you plan to enable the vibrant-posts config option):

npm install

After that, let bundler do it's job.

bundle install

If you plan to enable generate-thumbnails, you will need to activate the production group as well (requires ImageMagick installed, see Prerequisites section above):

bundle install --with production


Normal Jekyll build process, wrapped in bundler:

Generate the site and exit:

bundle exec jekyll b

Start a local server with auto-regeneration enabled:

bundle exec jekyll s

AWS Amplify Build

See tools/build.yml


  • tools/ shell script to generate an identical "@2x" file for every image in the upload asset directory (/assets/img/lol/) that doesn't already have one, since the template expects to find an @2x for everything.
  • tools/unused_asset_cleanup.js: node script to find and remove images in the upload asset dir that aren't referenced by any posts, useful after cleanup. Requires yaml-front-matter node module installed.

Posting (the one true path to enlightenment)

It's Still Just Jekyll

Posts are individual markdown files contained in the _posts/ directory. The name of the file isn't used by the site at all, but the convention is for us humans to keep track of the giant pile:, ex: Anything added to this directory with a published: true value in the frontmatter will suddenly show up on the site once it's pushed.

Frontmatter Options

  • layout: [required] always post, don't change this. - guid: [deprecated] some unique non-spaced string to identify this post, not yet used, but will be in the future for the Old posts just have their hex ids from the old site. 88b2e is just as valid here as horse-fart-factory.
  • published: [required] if true, this will be live on the site as soon as it's pushed. If false, it won't be. Useful for drafts, but it will still be visible here in git for any enterprising individuals, so not good for hiding anything.
  • date: [required] yep. Format is YYYY-MM-DD HH:MM:SS TZ ex: 2015-02-26 13:01:01 -0500
  • modified: [optional] same format as date, used to add a "last updated" to post header details
  • showAuthor: [optional] whether to show the author information for this post, defaults to false if not specified.
  • author: [required if showAuthor is true] two keys (old posts do this incorrectly so don't follow their example)
    • name: [required if showAuthor is true] the text to display as the author name in the post
    • twitter: [optional] twitter account page for the to link to if specified
  • title: [required] the actual, literal title string for the post, in double quotes
  • redirect_from: [optional] relative url path that can serve as an alias to this post (works with ex: /horse-fart-factory/, or /post/big-time-butts/final/, also can optionally be a list of links
  • excerpt: [required] short preview description that shows up on the home page previews and used for the RSS feed and social posts
  • category: [required] must be one of (case matters): Comics, Articles, Videos, Junk
  • tags: [required] array list of comma separated tags, each one contained in double quotes, ex: ["farts", "asses", "big banana time", "It's a full sentence tag, baybeeee!"] - comments [deprecated] whether or not to enable the comments section on this post
  • image: [optional] array of image options for this post, all image paths should be relative to the site root, eg: assets/img/lol/comic1.png; don't use @2x versions here they will automatically be applied as needed
    • feature: [optional] image to be used as the central feature of the post, in Comics category posts, this is the comic itself. Can't be used alongside headliner.
    • headliner: [optional] big cover image to use for this post, like Articles, Videos, Junk. Can't be used alongside feature.
    • imageHover: [optional] alt-text mouse hover content for headliner or feature image
    • thumbnail: [optional] image to use for previews on the site (homepage, related posts, etc) and for RSS feed and social posts. Expected dimensions: width: 1200px, height: 600px. If this is not specified and headliner exists, the full headliner image will be used. If this is not specified and feature exists, an auto-cropped version of the feature image will be used in all these places.
    • credit: [optional] array of credit caption details
      • title: [required if credit] the text of the image credit caption to be displayed
      • link: [optional] the url that the title text should link to
  • video: [optional] array definition of video content for this post (YouTube is the only available service but this could be later extended to support more). Post category does not have to be Video to use this key.
    • youtube: [required if video] url to the YouTube video, either the public facing link ("") or the embed url ("") contained within double quotes. The id is extracted and used for an iframe embed after the post content is rendered.


Everything is markdown, but regular HTML is still allowed when needed. Posts containing a feature image can also still define content, it will be added below the comic, before the comic nav buttons. Posts with both a video and content will display the content above the video embed the same way Articles and Junk posts do.


If the post contains an image.feature and doesn't specify an image.thumbnail, we'll generate an auto-cropped thumbnail image to use for post previews on the site and to embed in the RSS feed and social posts. The logic for the auto-thumbs is:

  1. resize the original to be at least 2x the size of the frame (1200x 600 for thumbnails), maintaining proportions
  2. crop a section at x: 40% of the image width y: 10% of the image height, the size of the frame


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