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<title>Canada's Dumb Laws - These found bah Jak for his lil brother and mah #1 pimp... </title>
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<p align="center"><b><font size="6">Ownage performed bah: Hackah Jak<br>
Mad lubbin to: Devil-C and Seductress</font></b>
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<p align="center"><img border="0" src="f_canada.gif" width="50" height="32"><big><strong><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="+3">Canada</font></strong></big><!-- #EndEditable -->
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<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">30% of
a radio stations content must be &quot;Canadian
Content&quot;.<br>
<i><br>
To qualify as 'Canadian content' a musical selection must
fulfill at least two of the following conditions:<br>
M (music) -- the music is composed entirely by a Canadian.<br>
A (artist) -- the music is, or the lyrics are, performed
principally by a Canadian.<br>
P (production) -- the musical selection consists of a live
performance that is (i) recorded wholly in Canada, or (ii)
performed wholly in Canada and broadcast live in Canada.<br>
L (lyrics) -- the lyrics are written entirely by a Canadian.<!-- #EndEditable -->
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</i></font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">You may
not pay for a fifty-cent item with only pennies.</font></li>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Citizens
may not publicly remove bandages.</font></li>
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<strong><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Alberta</font></strong>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><b>Provincial
Laws</b></font>
</div>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Businesses
must provide rails for tying up horses.</font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Wooden
logs may not be painted.</font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">You may
never use dice to play craps<font color="#000000">.</font></font><font color="red" face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">
(Repealed)</font></li>
</ul>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><b>City Laws</b></font>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">If you
are released from prison, it is required that you are given
a handgun with bullets and a horse, so you can ride out of
town.</font></li>
</ul>
<div align="center">
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><strong>British
Columbia</strong> <b>Provincial Laws</b></font>
</div>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">It is
illegal to kill a sasquatch.</font></li>
</ul>
<div align="center">
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><strong>New
Brunswick</strong> <b>Provincial Laws</b></font>
</div>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Driving
on the roads is not allowed.</font></li>
</ul>
<div align="center">
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><strong>Nova
Scotia </strong><b>Provincial Laws</b></font>
</div>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">When
raining, a person may not water his/her lawn.</font></li>
</ul>
<div align="center">
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><strong>Ontario
</strong><b>Provincial Laws</b></font>
</div>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">The
speed limit is 80 kph for cars, but bicyclists have the
right of way.</font></li>
</ul>
<p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><b>City
Laws</b></font></p>
<p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Etobicoke</em></font></p>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Bylaw
states that no more than 3.5 inches of water is allowed in a
bathtub.</font></li>
</ul>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Cobourg</em></font>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">If you
have a water trough in your front yard it must be filled by
5:00 a.m.</font></li>
</ul>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Gananoque</em></font>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Homeowners
are responsible for clearing snow off of municipal
sidewalks.</font></li>
</ul>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Guelph</em></font>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">The
city is classified as a no-pee zone.</font></li>
</ul>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Kanata</em></font>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">The
color of house and garage doors is regulated by city bylaws
(a purple door get you a fine). It is also illegal to have a
clothes line in your backyard.</font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">You
can't work on your car in the street.</font></li>
</ul>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Oshawa</em></font>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">It's
illegal to climb trees.</font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Homeowners
are responsible for clearing snow off of municipal
sidewalks. &nbsp;If sidewalks is not cleaned within 24 hours
after a snowfall, city workers will clean it and the cost
will be placed on the homeowners tax bill.</font></li>
</ul>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Ottawa</em></font>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">It is
illegal to eat ice-cream on Bank Street on a Sunday.</font></li>
</ul>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Toronto</em></font>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">You
can't drag a dead horse down Yonge St. on a Sunday.</font></li>
</ul>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Uxbridge</em></font>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Residents
are not allowed to have an Internet connection faster than
56k.</font></li>
</ul>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Wawa</em></font>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">You may
not paint a ladder as it will be slippery when wet.</font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">It is
illegal to show public affection on Sunday.</font></li>
</ul>
<div align="center">
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><strong>Quebec</strong>
<b>Provincial Laws</b></font>
</div>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">It is
illegal to turn right on a red light at any time.</font></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">All
business signs in the province of Quebec must be in French.
If the business operator wishes to have English on the sign,
the French must be at least twice as large as the English
is. There are no laws governing the usage of other languages
on signs. -Bill 101 (Passed 1976)</font></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">No
language other than French is permitted to be shown out
doors.</font></li>
</ul>
<p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><b>City
Laws</b></font></p>
<p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Beaconsfield</em></font></p>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">It is
considered an offense to have more than two colors of paint
on your house.</font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">You may
not own a log cabin.</font></li>
</ul>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Montréal</em></font>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">The
Queen Elizabeth Hotel must feed your horse freely when you
rent a room.&nbsp; <font color="red">(Repealed 1998)</font></font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">You may
not wash your car in the street.</font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">You may
not park a car in such a way that it is blocking your own
driveway.</font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">&quot;For
Sale&quot; signs are not permitted in the windows of moving
vehicles.</font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Cars
parked in public places must be locked, and their windows
must be down to less than the width of a&nbsp;hand.</font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">One's
rear license plate may not be protected by glass or plastic.</font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">You may
not swear in French.</font>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Citizens
may not relieve themselves or spit on the street. Punishable
by a fine of over 100 Canadian dollars.</font></li>
</ul>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2"><em>Outremont</em></font>
<ul>
<li><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Not
only do all exterior painting jobs require a permit (for
color) but, for instance, the City went to Appeals Court
over the exact type of division inside a window frame.</font></li>
</ul>
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