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<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 3.2//EN"><HTML><HEAD> <TITLE></TITLE><META Name="ff" CONTENT=""><META Name="cat" CONTENT=""><META Name="type" CONTENT=""><META Name="lang" CONTENT=""><META Name="taste" CONTENT=""><META Name="sc" CONTENT=""></HEAD><BODY BGCOLOR="#FFFDFD">
<TABLE border=0 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 width=600>
<TR>
<TD valign=bottom><A HREF="/home.html"><IMG SRC="http://images.jokes.com/images/interfaces/default/jokes.logo.white.gif" WIDTH="466" HEIGHT="87" BORDER="0"></A></TD>
<TD align=center>
<TABLE BORDER="0" CELLPADDING="0" CELLSPACING="0" height=87 width=130>
<TR>
<TD align=center valign=bottom>
<SCRIPT LANGUAGE="JavaScript">
<!--
function getCookie(name){
var cname = name + '=';
var dc = document.cookie;
if (dc.length > 0) {
begin = dc.indexOf(cname);
if (begin != -1) {
begin += cname.length;
end = dc.indexOf(';', begin);
if (end == -1) end = dc.length;
return unescape(dc.substring(begin, end));
}
}
return null;
}
if (getCookie('user_id') == null)
{
document.write('<FORM ACTION="/login.taf?_function=login" METHOD=POST>');
document.write('<input type=text name=user_id value="USER ID" size=10 maxlength=15><br>');
document.write('<input type=password name=PASSWORD value="PASSWORD" size=10 maxlength=10><br>');
document.write('<input type=submit value="Login">');
document.write('</FORM>');
}
else
{
funny = "I once had an uncle named " + getCookie('user_id') + ".#There once was a monkey named " + getCookie('user_id') + ".#" + getCookie('user_id') + ", 48th President of the United States.#" + getCookie('user_id') + ", " + getCookie('user_id') + ", " + getCookie('user_id') + ", weeeee!#" + getCookie('user_id') + ", my soulmate.#I love you " + getCookie('user_id') + ".#" + getCookie('user_id') + ", you're a jerk.#" + getCookie('user_id') + ", don't look at me!#I am " + getCookie('user_id') + ", take me to your leader!#" + getCookie('user_id') + "! Where's my ham!#Knock knock. Who's there? " + getCookie('user_id') + ".#" + getCookie('user_id') + ", have you ever purgured yourself?#Hi. My name is " + getCookie('user_id') + ".#Have you seen this person? " + getCookie('user_id') + ", nut at large.#My name is Frank, but you can call me " + getCookie('user_id') + ".";
sfunny = funny.split('#');
ran = Math.round(Math.random()*100) % sfunny.length ;
document.write('<FONT size=1>' + sfunny[ran] + '</FONT>');
document.write('<A HREF="/edit_account.taf"><IMG SRC="http://images.jokes.com/images/interfaces/default/edit.profile.gif" BORDER="0" alt="edit your profile" width=132 height=30></A>');
}
//-->
</SCRIPT>
</TD>
</TR>
</TABLE>
</TD>
</TR>
<TR>
<TD><SCRIPT LANGUAGE="JavaScript">
<!--
random_ad = Math.round(Math.random()*100) % 100000 + 1 ;
document.write('<IFRAME SRC="http://connect.247media.ads.link4ads.com/serv/1/jokes_com/jokes_comros/jokes_comros/19279;type=t;uniq='+ random_ad + '" WIDTH=468 HEIGHT=60 MARGINWIDTH=0 MARGINHEIGHT=0 FRAMEBORDER=0 SCROLLING=no><a href="http://connect.247media.ads.link4ads.com/click/1/jokes_com/jokes_comros/jokes_comros/19279;uniq='+ random_ad + '" target="_top"><img src="http://connect.247media.ads.link4ads.com/serv/1/jokes_com/jokes_comros/jokes_comros/19279;uniq='+ random_ad + '" BORDER="0" HEIGHT="60" WIDTH="468"><\/a><\/IFRAME>');
//-->
</SCRIPT></TD>
<TD>
<!--<SCRIPT LANGUAGE="JavaScript">
document.write('<A HREF=http://adserver.structure.net/click.ng/site=jokes&jokeadtype=1&transid='+ random_ad +'><IMG SRC=http://adserver.structure.net/image.ng/site=jokes&jokeadtype=1&transid='+ random_ad +' HSPACE=0 VSPACE=0 BORDER=0 HEIGHT=60 WIDTH=132></A>');
//</SCRIPT>-->
</TD>
</TR>
</TABLE>
<TABLE border=0 cellspacing=3 cellpadding=0 width=600><TR><TD valign=top width=150><!--- Begin Joke Database Search --->
<CENTER>
<A href="http://www.colleges.com/shopping/"><img src="/images/posterad.gif" border=0></A><BR>
<FORM method=post action="/navigate.taf" name=jump>
<select name=page ONCHANGE="location.href=this.form.page.options[this.form.page.selectedIndex].value">
<OPTION VALUE="/home.html">Jump To:
<OPTION VALUE="/mail.taf">Check Email
<OPTION VALUE="/addaccount.taf">Make Account
<OPTION VALUE="/joke_du_jour.html">Joke du Jour
<OPTION VALUE="/hnn/hnn_list.html">HNN
<OPTION VALUE="/edit_account.taf">Edit Profile
<OPTION VALUE="/make_simian.taf">E - Cards
<OPTION VALUE="/goo/1goo.html">Goo Gallery
<OPTION VALUE="/joke_submission.taf">Submit a Joke
<OPTION VALUE="/jokes_chat.taf">Chat
<OPTION VALUE="/logout.taf">Logout
<OPTION VALUE="/email_list.taf">Edit Email List
<OPTION VALUE="/rating_explanation.html">Ratings
<OPTION VALUE="/help.html">Help
<OPTION VALUE="/feedback.taf">Feedback
</SELECT><NOSCRIPT><input type=submit value=Go></NOSCRIPT>
</FORM></CENTER>
<FORM METHOD="POST" ACTION="/joke_search.taf">
<TABLE BORDER=0 CELLPADDING=1 CELLSPACING=0 BGCOLOR="#660099">
<TR VALIGN=TOP ALIGN=LEFT BGCOLOR="#660099"><TD>
<INPUT type=image SRC="http://images.jokes.com/images/interfaces/default/jokes.search.gif" WIDTH="140" HEIGHT="151" BORDER="0" hspace=1 alt=Search>
</TD>
</TR>
<TR>
<TD><select name="cat">
<option value="B">Blonde
<option value="C">Business
<option value="D">Computer
<option value="E">Dirty
<option value="F">Education
<option value="G">Entertainment
<option value="H">Gender
<option value="I">Insults
<option value="J">Lawyer
<option value="M">Miscellaneous
<option value="K">Relationship
<option value="L">News
<option value="N">Political
<option value="O">Redneck
<option value="P">SciFi
<option value="Q">YourMama</select></TD>
</TR>
<TR>
<TD><SELECT NAME="type" SIZE=1>
<OPTION VALUE="" >Select Type
<OPTION VALUE="A" >One Liner
<OPTION VALUE="B">Story
<OPTION VALUE="C">Top 10/Lists</SELECT></TD>
</TR>
<TR><TD VALIGN=TOP ALIGN=LEFT BGCOLOR="#660099"><BR>
<INPUT TYPE=SUBMIT VALUE="Search"> <INPUT TYPE=RESET VALUE="Clear"></TD></TR>
</TABLE>
</FORM>
<!--- End Joke Database Search --->
</TD><TD valign=top width=300><TABLE BORDER=0 cellpadding=1 cellspacing=0 width=290>
<TR><TD BGCOLOR="#CC3366">
<TABLE BORDER=0 cellpadding=3 cellspacing=0 width=290>
<TR><TD BGCOLOR=FFFF00>
<B><FONT SIZE="4" FACE="arial,helvetica,verdana"></FONT></B></TD></TR><TR><TD BGCOLOR=WHITE><BR><SCRIPT LANGUAGE="JavaScript"><!--if (navigator.userAgent.indexOf('Windows') != -1){document.write('<FONT size=2>');}//--></SCRIPT></FONT><BR><BR><TABLE BORDER="0" CELLPADDING="0" CELLSPACING="0" width=260><TR align=center><TD><FONT SIZE="2">Funny Factor:</FONT><B></B></TD><TD><FONT SIZE="2">Monkeys Surveyed:</FONT><B></B></TD></TR></TABLE><CENTER><TABLE BORDER=0 cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0><TR><TD><IMG SRC="http://images.jokes.com/images/interfaces/default/default.ff..gif"></TD></TR></TABLE><FONT SIZE="2"> </FONT><br><FORM method=post action="http://www.jokes.com/vote.taf"><INPUT TYPE=HIDDEN name=JOKE_ID value=""><SELECT NAME="vote" SIZE=1> <OPTION VALUE="" SELECTED>Funny Factor <OPTION VALUE="10">10 <OPTION VALUE="9"> 9 <OPTION VALUE="8"> 8 <OPTION VALUE="7"> 7 <OPTION VALUE="6"> 6 <OPTION VALUE="5"> 5 <OPTION VALUE="4"> 4 <OPTION VALUE="3"> 3 <OPTION VALUE="2"> 2 <OPTION VALUE="1"> 1 </SELECT><input type=submit value="Vote"></FORM></CENTER></TD></TR></TABLE></TD></TR></TABLE></TD><TD valign=top align=center width=150 BGCOLOR="#33FF00"><TABLE BORDER="0" CELLPADDING="1" CELLSPACING="0" width=150><TR><TD valign=top align=center heigth=300><FORM method=post action="/email_a_joke.taf?_function=email"><INPUT TYPE=HIDDEN name=JOKE_ID value=""><INPUT type=image SRC="http://images.jokes.com/images/interfaces/default/email.gif" alt="Send this Joke to a Friend" border=0 width=128 height=52></FORM></TD></TR></TABLE></TD></TR></TABLE><BR><BR>
<TABLE BORDER="0" CELLPADDING="0" CELLSPACING="0" width=600>
<TR><TD colspan=3 align=center><IFRAME WIDTH=468 HEIGHT=60 MARGINWIDTH=0 MARGINHEIGHT=0 HSPACE=0 VSPACE=0 FRAMEBORDER=0 SCROLLING=no BORDERCOLOR="#000000" SRC="http://adserver.structure.net/html.ng/site=jokes&pagepos=2">
<SCRIPT LANGUAGE="JavaScript1.1" SRC="http://adserver.structure.net/js.ng/Params.richmedia=yes&site=jokes&pagepos=2"></SCRIPT></IFRAME><NOSCRIPT><A HREF="http://adserver.structure.net/click.ng/site=jokes&pagepos=2"><IMG SRC="http://adserver.structure.net/image.ng/site=jokes&pagepos=2"></A></NOSCRIPT></TD></TR>
<TR> <TD><IMG SRC="http://images.jokes.com/images/interfaces/default/def.footer.gif" WIDTH="103" HEIGHT="80" BORDER="0"></TD>
<TD align=center width=500><FONT SIZE="2"><A HREF="http://www.jokes.com">Home</A> | <A HREF="/email.html">Check Email</A> | <A HREF="/addaccount.taf">Create Account</A> | <A HREF="/joke_du_jour.html">Joke du Jour</A> | <A HREF="/hnn/hnn_list.html">Hondo's Headlines</A><BR><BR>
<A HREF="/edit_account.taf">Edit Your Profile</A> | <A HREF="/make_simian.taf">Simian Greetings E-Cards</A> | <A HREF="/goo/1goo.html">Goo Gallery</A> | <A HREF="/joke_submission.taf">Submit a Joke</A> <BR><BR>
<A HREF="/jokes_chat.taf">Chat</A> | <A HREF="/logout.taf">Logout</A> | <A HREF="/email_list.taf">Edit Email List</A> | <A HREF="/rating_explanation.html">Ratings Explanation</A> | <A HREF="/help.html">Help</A> | <A HREF="/feedback.taf">Feedback</A></FONT>
</TD>
<TD><FONT SIZE="1"><A HREF="http://www.lostreality.com"><IMG SRC="http://images.jokes.com/images/interfaces/default/wh.lrs.logo.gif" WIDTH="50" HEIGHT="60" BORDER="0"></A>&copy;1998 <BR><A HREF="Http://www.lostreality.com">Lost Reality Studios</A></FONT>
</TD>
</TR></TABLE>
</BODY></HTML>