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<HTML>
<HEAD>
<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=windows-1252">
<TITLE>Something Awful</TITLE>
<style type="text/css">
a { text-decoration: none; }
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<CENTER>
<TABLE WIDTH="96%" BORDER="0" CELLPADDING="0" CELLSPACING="0">
<TR>
<TD ALIGN="left" VALIGN="top"> <!-- Logo Table -->
<TABLE BORDER="0" CELLPADDING="0" CELLSPACING="0" WIDTH="100%">
<TR>
<TD ALIGN="left" VALIGN="top" WIDTH="77" HEIGHT="22">&nbsp;</TD>
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<TD ALIGN="left" VALIGN="top" WIDTH="100" HEIGHT="50" BACKGROUND="main-background-rightcorner.gif"><IMG SRC="blank.gif" WIDTH="100" HEIGHT="50"></TD>
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<TABLE BORDER="0" CELLPADDING="0" CELLSPACING="0" WIDTH="100%">
<TR>
<TD ALIGN="left" VALIGN="top" WIDTH="77" HEIGHT="100%" BACKGROUND="main-background-left.gif">
<div align="right"> <img src="blank.gif" width="100" height="8"><table width="95%" border="0" cellspacing="2" cellpadding="4">
<tr valign="top">
<td> <img src="button-main.gif" width="90" height="20"><br>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="index.html"><font size="-1"><b>Front</b></font></a><br>
</font>
<p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><font size="-1"><img src="button-news.gif" width="90" height="20"><br>
&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="index.html">Current</a><br>
</font></b></font></p>
<p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><font size="-1"><img src="button-stuff.gif" width="90" height="20"><br>
</font><b><font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="articles/index.html">Articles</a></font></b><br>
<b><font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="askjeffk/index.html">Ask
Jeff </a></font></b><br>
<b><font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="blurbs/index.html">Blurbs</a></font></b><br>
<b><font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="cartoons/index.html">Cartoons</a></font></b><br>
<b><font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="clanhell/index.htm">Clan
Hell</a></font></b><br>
<b><font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="contests/index.html">Contests</a></font></b><br>
<b><font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="eq/index.html">Everquest<br>
</a></font><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><b><font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="http://ve.dhs.org/lowtax/" target="_blank">Files</a></font></b></b></font><font size="-1"><a href="eq/index.html"></a></font></b><br>
<b><font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="links/index.html">Links</a></font></b><br>
<b><font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="mp3/index.html">mp3s</a></font></b>
<br>
<font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="spam/index.html">Pranks</a></font><br>
<font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="spam/index.html">Spam</a></font><br>
<font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="stateog/index.html">State
Og</a></font><br>
</b></font></p>
<p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><font size="-1"><img src="button-reviews.gif" width="90" height="20"><br>
&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="games/index.html">Games</a><br>
</font><b><font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="reviews/index.html">Movies</a></font></b></b></font></p>
<p><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><b><b><font size="-1"><img src="button-forums.gif" width="90" height="20"></font></b><font size="-1"><br>
&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="chat/index.html">Chatroom</a><br>
</font><b><font size="-1">&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="http://somethingawful.cozmo.com/cgi-bin/Ultimate.cgi?action=intro&amp;BypassCookie=true">Post</a></font></b></b><font size="-1"><br>
</font></b></font></p>
<p> <font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><img src="button-staff.gif" width="90" height="20"><br>
&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="staff/index.html"><font size="-1"><b>Contact</b></font></a></font></p>
<p><img src="button-hosted.gif" width="90" height="20"><br>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><font size="-2">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="cliff/index.html">Cliff
Y.</a></font></b></font> <br>
<font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><font size="-2"> </font><font size="-2">
&nbsp;&nbsp; <a href="cranky/index.html"> Cranky Steve</a><br>
</font><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><font size="-2">&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="jeffk/index.html">Jeff
K.<br>
</a></font><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><font size="-2">&nbsp;&nbsp;
<a href="pretty/index.html"> Pretty Flower<br>
</a></font><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><font size="-2">&nbsp;&nbsp;
<a href="soapbanditos/index.html"> Soap Banditos</a></font></b></font><font size="-2"></font></b></font><font size="-2"><a href="jeffk/index.html">
</a> </font></b></font><font size="-2"> </font></b></font><font size="-2"><a href="pretty/index.html">
</a></font></b></font><font size="-2"></font></b></font><font size="-2"><a href="jeffk/index.html">
</a> </font></b></font><font size="-2"> <br>
</font></b></font>
<p align="center"><a href="http://www.gamefan-network.com"> </a><a href="http://www.voodooextreme.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://www.voodooextreme.com/images/ve_button.gif" width="81" height="31" border="1" alt="More Quality Shit!"></a>
<br>
<a href="index.html"><img src="sa-button-blur.gif" width="81" height="31" border="1"></a>
<br>
<a href="jeffk/index.html"><img src="jeffkbutton.gif" width="81" height="31" border="1"></a>
</td>
</tr>
</table>
</div>
</TD>
<TD ALIGN="left" VALIGN="top" WIDTH="100%" bgcolor="#FFFFFF"> <!-- Main Content -->
<br>
<center>
<TABLE BORDER="0" CELLPADDING="3" CELLSPACING="0" WIDTH="468" BGCOLOR="#000000">
<TR>
<TD ALIGN="left">
<iframe src="http://ad.doubleclick.net/adi/somethingawful.com/;sz=468x60;ord=112921" width=468 height=60 marginwidth=0 marginheight=0 hspace=0 vspace=0 frameborder=0 scrolling=no bordercolor="#000000"></iframe>
<SCRIPT LANGUAGE='JavaScript' SRC='http://ad.doubleclick.net/adj/somethingawful.com/;abr=!ie;abr=!webtv;sz=468x60;ord=112921'>
</SCRIPT>
<NOSCRIPT> <A HREF="http://ad.doubleclick.net/jump/somethingawful.com/;abr=!ie4;abr=!ie5;sz=468x60";ord= target="_blank">112921">
<IMG SRC="http://ad.doubleclick.net/ad/somethingawful.com/;abr=!ie4;abr=!ie5a;sz=468x60";ord= width="32" height="32">112921"></a>
</NOSCRIPT> </TD>
<TD ALIGN="right"> <A HREF="http://www.gamefan-network.com" target="_blank"><img src="gamefan-box.gif" width="60" height="60" BORDER="0" alt="GameFan Is the Cure to All of Life's Problems"></A>
</TD>
</TR>
</TABLE>
<!-- Begin Web-Stat code -->
<script language="JavaScript">
<!-- hide script from old browsers
function stopError(){return true;}
window.onerror = stopError;var i=0;
document.write('<a href="http://www.web-stat.com" target="new">');
document.write('<img src="http://www.web-stat.com/ENGLISH/CGI-BIN/fastcount6.cgi?')
document.write('lowtax,'+parent.document.referrer);
if (window.screen){document.write(','+screen.width+'x'+screen.height);
document.write(','+screen.colorDepth);}
document.write('" onError="alternate();" onAbort="alternate();" name="counter"')
document.write('width="1" height="1" border=0 alt="web-stat.com : counter and tracker"></a>')
function alternate(){i++;if(i==1){
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<img src=
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width="1" height="1" border=0 alt="web-stat.com : counter and tracker"></a></noscript>
<!-- End Web-Stat code -->
</center>
<table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="1">
<tr>
<td width="50%" bgcolor="#FFFFFF" valign="top">
<table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0">
<tr>
<td width="20" height="20" background="updates-topleftcorner.gif"><img src="blank.gif" width="20" height="20"></td>
<td background="updates-topbackground.gif" width="100%"><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-1" color="#FFFFFF"><b>Newest
Content</b></font></td>
<td width="20" height="20" background="updates-toprightcorner.gif"><img src="blank.gif" width="20" height="20"></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="20" background="updates-leftside.gif">&nbsp;</td>
<td bgcolor="#CCCCCC" valign="top" width="100%"><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
<!-- NP v3.7 -->
<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">3.30 - <b><a href="crabs/savings.htm">
Leonard Crabs' Carnival of Savings!</a></b></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><br>
3.29 - <b><a href="spam/icq-pike-01.htm"> ICQ Prank:
&quot;The Big Hack Attack&quot;</a></b></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><br>
3.27 - <b><a href="askjeffk/askjeff-03-27-2000.htm">
Ask Jeff K.! On Monday! Woah!</a></b></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><br>
3.22 - <b><a href="http://ve.dhs.org/lowtax/SixtyDays.mp3"> New mp3: &quot;Sixty
Days&quot;</a></b></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><br>
3.21 - <b><a href="spam/icq-concon-01.htm"> ICQ
Prank: &quot;The c0n c0n Man&quot;</a></b></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font> <font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font>
</font></td>
<td width="20" background="updates-rightside.gif">&nbsp;</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="20" height="20" background="updates-bottomleftcorner.gif"><img src="blank.gif" width="20" height="20"></td>
<td background="updates-bottombackground.gif" width="100%">&nbsp;</td>
<td width="20" height="20" background="updates-bottomrightcorner.gif"><img src="blank.gif" width="20" height="20"></td>
</tr>
</table>
</td>
<td width="50%" bgcolor="#FFFFFF" valign="top">
<table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0">
<tr>
<td width="20" height="20" background="updates-topleftcorner.gif"><img src="blank.gif" width="20" height="20"></td>
<td background="updates-topbackground.gif" width="100%"><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-1" color="#FFFFFF"><b>Hosted
Site Updates</b></font></td>
<td width="20" height="20" background="updates-toprightcorner.gif"><img src="blank.gif" width="20" height="20"></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="20" background="updates-leftside.gif">&nbsp;</td>
<td bgcolor="#CCCCCC" valign="top"> <font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
<!-- NP v3.7 -->
<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">3.24 - Jeff K. -
<a href="jeffk/adventure/index.htm"><b>&quot;Choose
Your Own Adventure&quot;</b></a></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><br>
3.24 - <b></b> Soap Banditos - <b><a href="soapbanditos/index.html">&quot;Charles!&quot;</a></b></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><br>
3.18 - <b></b> Soap Banditos - <b><a href="soapbanditos/index.html">&quot;Enter
the Robot!&quot;</a></b></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><br>
3.17 - Jeff K. - <a href="jeffk/teenforetress2.htm"><b>&quot;Teen
Fortress 2&quot; Screenshots</b></a></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><br>
3.14 - <b></b> Soap Banditos - <b><a href="soapbanditos/index.html">&quot;The
Penguin!&quot;</a></b></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
</font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"> </font>
</font></td>
<td width="20" height="20" background="updates-rightside.gif">&nbsp;</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="20" height="20" background="updates-bottomleftcorner.gif"><img src="blank.gif" width="20" height="20"></td>
<td background="updates-bottombackground.gif">&nbsp;</td>
<td width="20" height="20" background="updates-bottomrightcorner.gif"><img src="blank.gif" width="20" height="20"></td>
</tr>
</table>
</td>
</tr>
</table>
<div align="center"> <b><a href="http://www.portalofevil.com/emailsignup.htm"><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">Get
your own email address at somethingawful.com! Free! Click here!</font></a></b><br>
</div>
<table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="3" cellpadding="3" bgcolor="#FFFFFF">
<tr valign="top">
<td>
<div align="justify">
<div align="justify">
<p align="center"><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono" size="+7" color="#FF0033">S0METHING
AWFUL -</font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono" size="+7" color="#FF0033">***
OWN3D ***</font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono" size="+7"><a href="http://www.geocities.com/jerry_l33t_killah/index.html" target="_blank"><b>BY
CLAN 9MILLIMETER!!!</b></a></font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono" size="+7" color="#FF0033">3V3RYB0DY
3LS3 1S 4 W4NN4-B3!!!</font></p>
<p align="center"><font color="#FF0033" face="Courier New, Courier, mono">nice
webpage, dont mind if i take it myself</font></p>
<p align="center"><font color="#FF0033" face="Courier New, Courier, mono">here's
how a real hacker operates, not a wanna-be like Jeff K (LOWTAX)</font></p>
<p align="center"><font color="#FF0033" face="Courier New, Courier, mono">electronic
freedom united by</font> <font face="Courier New, Courier, mono"><i><a href="http://www.geocities.com/jerry_l33t_killah/index.html" target="_blank"><b>CLAN
9MILLIMETER</b></a></i></font></p>
<p align="center"><a href="http://www.geocities.com/jerry_l33t_killah/index.html"><b><font color="#CC0033">http://www.geocities.com/jerry_l33t_killah/index.html</font></b></a></p>
<p align="center"><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono">PEACE OUT!</font></p>
</div>
</div>
</td>
</tr>
</table>
<div align="center">
<table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="1">
<tr>
<td>
<div align="center"><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2">
0WN3D BY CLAN 9MILLIMETER</font></div>
</td>
</tr>
</table>
</div>
</TD>
<TD ALIGN="left" VALIGN="top" WIDTH="12" BACKGROUND="main-background-rightback.gif">
<p>
<p>
<table width="100" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0">
<tr valign="top">
<td><table width="90" border="0" cellspacing="2" cellpadding="2" align="center">
<tr valign="top">
<td>
<div align="center">
<table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0">
<tr>
<td>
<div align="center"><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b>Useful</b></font></div>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<div align="center"><a href="crabs/savings.htm"><img src="ads/tab-ad-leonard.jpg" width="90" height="75" border="0"></a></div>
</td>
</tr>
<tr valign="top">
<td>
<div align="center"><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><a href="crabs/savings.htm"><b>Leonard
Crabs' Carnival of Savings!</b></a></font></div>
</td>
</tr>
</table>
<img src="blank.gif" width="90" height="20"><br>
<table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0">
<tr>
<td>
<div align="center"><b><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Amazing</font></b></div>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<div align="center"><a href="spam/icq-pike-01.htm"><b><img src="ads/tab-ad-hax0r.jpg" width="90" height="75" border="0"></b></a></div>
</td>
</tr>
<tr valign="top">
<td>
<div align="center"><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><a href="spam/icq-pike-01.htm"><b>ICQ
Prank: &quot;The Big Hack Attack&quot;</b></a></font></div>
</td>
</tr>
</table>
<img src="blank.gif" width="90" height="20"><br>
<table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0">
<tr>
<td>
<div align="center"><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b>YAY</b></font></div>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<div align="center"><a href="askjeffk/askjeff-03-27-2000-01.htm"><img src="ads/tab-ad-jeffkcity.jpg" width="90" height="75" border="0"></a></div>
</td>
</tr>
<tr valign="top">
<td>
<div align="center"><font face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="-2"><a href="askjeffk/askjeff-03-27-2000-01.htm"><b>Ask
Jeff K. - The Weekly Column!</b></a></font></div>
</td>
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