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Table of Contents
Why America is the Best:
-Brits started the colony but Americans were all "Fuck Eurofags!" America proceeds to own the Brits and reject their tea in favor
-War of 1812: Brits try again. Result: FAILURE!
-America then expands to the Pacific, owning Native Americans and Mexico along the way. MANIFEST DESTINY, BITCH!
-America has a civil war, pretty much because the rest of the world was made up of pussies, so we fought ourselves because we're so METAL!
-WWI: Eurofags try and reenact the American civil war, they fail miserably, we bail their asses out
-The Great Depression was so great, the rest of the world suffered for it
-WWII: Eurofags try again at the whole civil war reenactment, fail again, America develops nuclear weapons
-Post-WWII: America rules the world through different means; We fuck over the Commies hard because they are Commie bastards and they suck, like Nazis
-Present Day: Team America: World Police; Team Europe: World Faggots
-The Future: America remains on the forefront of technological breakthroughs, leading to a cure for all diseases, lasers, and other things that are awesome. Europe is consumed by the Zombie Apocalypse because they are too busy sucking to fight back.
You might be surprised to learn that the most dangerous group in America are the atheists. Atheists are a cult somewhat similar to satanists, but based on the idea that God does not exist. Atheism is the “official religion” of much of Europe, especially France and Germany and much of Canada.
Atheists believe that all people evolved from monkeys and rocks. They also believe that the universe was created by an explosion called a “Big Bang”. Any child knows that explosions destroy (rather than create), however I only mention this as a means to illustrate just how preposterous and unscientific the core beliefs of Atheists actually are.
Some Atheists call themselves “Intellectuals” or “Agnostics”, but all of them have something in common; specifically they do not accept Jesus Christ as their personal savior and therefore are going to Hell... but more than that they wish to drag you along with them!
You may not personally know an Atheist, but there are over 50,000 active atheists in the USA. Despite the insignificant size of this group, they are part of a well-motivated conspiracy to destabilize our values.
The anti-American alliance is made up of self-loathing liberals who blame the Americans for every ill in the Third World, and conservatives suffering from power-envy, bitter that the world's only superpower can do what it likes without having to ask permission. The truth is that America has behaved with enormous restraint since September 11. Remember, remember. Remember the gut-wrenching tapes of weeping men phoning their wives to say, "I love you," before they were burned alive. Remember those people leaping to their deaths from the top of burning skyscrapers. Remember the hundreds of firemen buried alive. Remember the smiling face of that beautiful little girl who was on one of the planes with her mother. Remember, remember - and realise that America has never retaliated for 9/11 in anything like the way it could have. So a few al-Qaeda tourists got locked without a trial in Camp X-ray? Pass the Kleenex. So some Afghan wedding receptions were shot up after they merrily fired their semi-automatics in a sky full of American planes? A shame, but maybe next time they should stick to confetti. I love America, yet America is hated. America is hated because it is what every country wants to be - rich, free, strong, open, optimistic. Or do you really think the USA is the root of all evil? Tell it to the loved ones of the men and women who leaped to their death from the burning towers. Tell it to the nursing mothers whose husbands died on one of the hijacked planes, or were ripped apart in a collapsing skyscraper. And tell it to the hundreds of young widows whose husbands worked for the New York Fire Department. To our shame, George Bush gets a worse press than Saddam Hussein. Remember, remember, September 11. One of the greatest atrocities in human history was committed against America! No, do more than remember. Never forget.
The anti-horse alliance is made up of self-loathing white people who blame horses for every ill in the World, and jews suffering from horse-envy, bitter that the world's greatest animal can do what it likes without having to ask permission. The truth is that Horses has behaved with enormous restraint since being domesticated. Remember, remember. Remember the gut-wrenching movie Sea Biscuit, and the diagnosis was a ruptured suspensory ligament in the front left leg. Remember those agonizing days when Sea biscuit, first at a walk and later at a trot and canter, learned to run again. Remember the Santa Anita Handicap, and its $121,000 prize. Remember him picking his way through the field. as they thundered down the back straight, taking the firm ground just off the rail. Remember, remember - and realize that horses have never retaliated for domestication in anything like the way it could have. So a few get kicked in the head? Pass the Kleenex. So some glue huffing asshole has to clean up some shit after a parade? A shame, but maybe should have thought about graduating high school. I love horses, yet horses are hated. Horses are hated because it is what every person wishes they could be - proud, free, strong, open, optimistic. Or do you really think horses are the root of all evil? Tell it to those proud calvary officers who cleansed the United States of the taint of the natives. Tell it to the farmer too old to work his ow fields who relies on these stalwart bastions of goodness. And tell it to every little girl who just wants something to love. To our shame, the Kentucky derby gets a worse press than NASCAR. Remember, remember, our noble equestrian friends. The greatest atrocities in human history is failure to appreciate our beloved brethren! No, do more than remember. Never forget.
The Rebel alliance is made up of self-loathing Jedi who blame the Empire for every ill in the galaxy, and politicians suffering from power-envy, bitter that the galaxy's only power can do what it likes without having to ask permission. The truth is that the Empire has behaved with enormous restraint since the Battle of Yavin. Remember, remember.
Remember the gut-wrenching holos of weeping stormtroopers phoning their partners to say, "I love you," before the station was destroyed. Remember those people leaping to their deaths from safety-pod hatches with no safety pods installed.
Remember the hundreds of droids buried alive.
Remember the smiling face of that beautiful girl who was in one of the detention cells. Remember, remember - and realise that the Empire has never retaliated for the destruction of the Death Star in anything like the way it could have.
So a few Rebels got locked without a trial in cellblock 1138? Pass the Kleenex.
So some Gungan wedding receptions were shot up after they merrily fired their blasters in a sky full of Empire shuttles? A shame, but maybe next time they should stick to confetti.
Remember, remember, the Death Star. One of the greatest atrocities in human history was committed against the Empire.
No, do more than remember. Never forget!
The Earth Federation is made up of self-loathing bleeding-hearts who blame the Zabis for every ill in the Earth sphere, and elitists suffering from power-envy, bitter that the its colonies' only superpower can do what it likes without having to ask permission. The truth is that Zeon has behaved with enormous restraint since the death of Garma Zabi. Remember, remember.
Remember the gut-wrenching tapes of Garma phoning his girlfriend to say, "I love you," before he was burned alive. Remember him charging to his death from inside of a burning Gaw. Remember the hundreds of crewmen incinerated. Remember, remember - and realise that Zeon has never retaliated for Garma in anything like the way it could have.
So a few Side 6 tourists got locked without a trial? Pass the Kleenex. So some Southeast Asian wedding receptions were shot up after they merrily fired their semi-automatics into a jungle full of Zeon mobile suits? A shame, but maybe next time they should stick to confetti.
I love Zeon, yet Zeon is hated. Zeon is hated because it is what every country wants to be - rich, free, strong, open, optimistic. Or do you really think the Principality is the root of all evil?
Tell it to my brother Garma Zabi, who was incinerated by the Federation warship White Base. Tell it to the nursing mothers whose husbands died in that battle, or were ripped apart in the explosion. And tell it to the millions of young widows whose husbands gave their lives for the Principality. To our shame, Zeon Deikun gets a worse press than General Revil.
Remember, remember, Garma Zabi. One of the greatest atrocities in human history was committed against Zeon!
No, do more than remember. Never forget. SIEG ZEON!
This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock powered by electricity generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the US department of energy.
I then took a shower in the clean water provided by the municipal water utility.
After that, I turned on the TV to one of the FCC regulated channels to see what the national weather service of the national oceanographic and atmospheric administration determined the weather was going to be like using satellites designed, built, and launched by the national aeronautics and space administration. I watched this while eating my breakfast of US department of agriculture inspected food and taking the drugs which have been determined as safe by the food and drug administration.
At the appropriate time as regulated by the US congress and kept accurate by the national institute of standards and technology and the US naval observatory, I get into my national highway traffic safety administration approved automobile and set out to work on the roads built by the local, state, and federal departments of transportation, possibly stopping to purchase additional fuel of a quality level determined by the environmental protection agency, using legal tender issued by the federal reserve bank. On the way out the door I deposit any mail I have to be sent out via the US postal service and drop the kids off at the public school.
Then, after spending the day not being maimed or killed at work thanks to the workplace regulations imposed by the department of labor and the occupational safety and health administration, I drive back to my house which has not burned down in my absence because of the state and local building codes and the fire marshall's inspection, and which has not been plundered of all its valuables thanks to the local police department.
I then log onto the internet which was developed by the defense advanced research projects administration and post on freerepublic and fox news forums about how SOCIALISM in medicine is BAD because the government can't do anything right.
My fellow Americans, Good morning.
About two hundred and forty years ago, our forefathers fought bravely, giving their blood, sweat and tears. And in the end, they won our Freedom. And we must never forget this.
If anything appears that threatens our belief in this Freedom, we will oppose it. We will crush it.
In fighting to gain our Freedom, we need no reasons. We require no just cause or flowery words. In order to protect our neighbors who love Freedom and this faith in Freedom, we continue to believe in our own justice.
We won't abandon any battles. And the reason is because we are all citizens of the United States of America.
And as long as you all will allow it, I will be a vanguard leading this fight.
And the reason is because I'm the President of this Great United States of America!
This is a transcript of an actual radio conversation of a US Naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. The transcipt of the Radio conversation was released by the Chief of Naval operations on the 10th october 1995.
Americans: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.
Canadians: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid collision.
Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy Ship, I say again, divert your course.
Canadians: Number One, I say again, divert your course.
Americans: This is the aircraft carrier USS Lincoln, the second largest ship in the United States Atlantic fleet. We are accompanied by three destroyers, three cruisers and numerous support vessels. I demand that you change your course 15 degrees noth. Thats one five degrees north, or counter measures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.
Canadians: This is a lighthouse. Your call.
Anyone else here not a racist, but wishes the Nazis had won?
Theirs was a truly effective fascist government that took a nation on its knees from a depression and turned it into a military, technological and economic powerhouse within the space of thirty years.
It was a social experiment in the way that many reformed or new nations are. America was an experiment in democracy and (eventually) egalitarianism. The Soviet Union was an experiment in Communism. Nazi Germany was the grandest experiment of them all: a rejection of the gentle side of man and a wholehearted pursuit of our more teutonic side: The glorification of the strong, the self-sufficient, and the dominant. It was to be the beginning of a bolder and more uncompromising global civilization that would bring discipline where before there was only coddling; that would harden the soft, and that would not be afraid to say that equality means equal opportunities, not that all men regardless of education or skill are inherently equal to one another. It was a call out to all men to transcend their passive, mediocre existances and aspire to become the heroic and unstoppable species that mankind always had the potential to become.
Nazi Germany was the combined hopes, dreams and ambitions of all who dared to dominate; but in the end, these dreams were quashed by weak, subversive men who would rather hold their superiors back rather than attempt to catch up.
THE FIRST AND MOST IMPORTANT THING I CARRY EVERY SINGLE DAY IS MY GUN, BECAUSE YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN A TERRORIST NAZI COMMUNIST NIGGER MIGHT TRY TO RAPE/MUG/KILL ME!
THE SECOND IS MY CELL PHONE SO THAT I CAN ALWAYS CHECK FOR TEXT AND PHONE MESSAGES THAT I NEVER GET
THE NEXT IS MY MP3 PLAYER, EVEN THOUGH MY PHONE ALSO HAS MP3 CAPABILITY, BUT IT LOOKS COOL!
THE NEXT IS MY PDA, BECAUSE WITH MY BUSY SCHEDULE OF BROWSING 4CHAN AND FAPPING TO PORN IT'S HARD TO KEEP TRACK OF ALL THE OTHER THINGS THAT NEED TO GET DONE
THE THIRD IS MY LIGHTER, EVEN THOUGH I USUALLY DON'T HAVE ANY CIGARETTES IN THE PICTURE. I TRY TO DO TRICKS WITH IT TO IMPRESS PEOPLE BUT I USUALLY END UP FAILING, AND PEOPLE LAUGH AWKWARDLY WHILE TRYING TO SAY THAT I DID OK.
NEXT I CARRY ANOTHER LIGHTER, JUST IN CASE MY OTHER ONE IS DAMAGED IN MY SHOOTOUT WITH THE ENEMY!
NEXT I CARRY A WATCH WITH 200 DIFFERENT FEATURES, 197 OF WHICH I NEVER USE.
NEXT I CARRY A BUNCH OF KEYS. A BUNCH. MOST ARE TO PADLOCKS I BOUGHT AND HAVE IN A TRUNK THAT'S LOCKED WITH A PADLOCK. IT MAKES ME LOOK IMPORTANT TO HAVE A LOT OF KEYS, THOUGH.
NEXT IS MY 50 MILLION CANDLEPOWER ELITE TACTICAL TOTALLY USED BY THE SEALS TACTICAL OPERATIONS FLASHLIGHT, FOR PLAYING WITH MY CAT.
NEXT IS MY WALLET, WHICH CONTAINS MORE MONEY THAN I ACTUALLY NEED IN CASH, BUT IT LOOKS COOL WHEN I HAVE ALL DAT PAPER. ALSO, LOOK I JUST HAPPENED TO HAVE MY ID SHOWING. I'M SO COOL TO HAVE "ACCIDENTALLY" PUT MY PICTURE ON THE INTERNET.
NEXT IS MY FOLDING TACTICAL 2.5" KNIFE, JUST IN CASE I RUN OUT OF AMMO OR AM ATTACKED BY A VICIOUS GANG OF CARDBOARD BOXES THAT NEED TO BE OPENED.
NEXT IS MY OTHER TACTICAL FOLDING KNIFE JUST IN CASE I HAVE TO LODGE THE OTHER ONE IN THE HEART OF AN ATTACKER!
NEXT IS MY MULTI-TOOL, JUST IN CASE I NEED TO REPAIR A JET OR SOMETHING.
LAST IS ANY SORT OF DECORATIONAL ITEM THAT I DON'T REALLY WEAR, BUT CARRY AROUND JUST IN CASE I'M ALONE SO THAT I CAN LOOK IN THE MIRROR AND THINK I LOOK COOL WITHOUT PEOPLE JUDGING ME.
They tried the "hurr durr bring in an owner's manual" crap with me last time I bought .357 ammo. I don't have an owner's manual for my 1894, but I had the fucking rifle in my trunk.
I went back to the car, loaded my remaining rounds, and stormed the walmart sporting goods counter. I leveled the barrel at the old man's head, while blading at a 45 degree angle and screaming for him to hand over the ammo. He stuttered, and fumbled in his pockets for the key to the case... but I had no time for his disrespect, so I let three rounds loose into center mass. He dropped the keys, and I picked up all the ammo I could fit in a cart.
I made a hasty escape by using the ammo cart as a skateboard, spray firing from the hip as I sailed past the electronics. Some kids were playing Halo and I dropped them on the spot. BOOM click-clack BOOM! A rent-a-cop dove towards the children, gallantly trying to take the bullets for them, but he fell short and slid into a display of Fritos. I loaded more rounds into my cop-killing evil-blued lever-automatic death machine, then fired upon some newborn children as their parents were walking into the store.
I then proceeded to the cashier, and forced her to ring up my goods at gunpoint. She asked, "Is this for a pistol, or a rifle?"
I shrieked "BOOOOOOOOOOOOTH!" and squeezed the trigger.
I then left my money on the counter. I grabbed my bags and dashed towards the exit. The woman at the door asked for my receipt, which caused me to shake uncontrollably and foam at the mouth. I moved my trusty lever action's switch to full auto, and let loose a barrage of poison hollow point .50 caliber bullets, riddling her body and spraying the door with a sweet ruby mist. She crawled after me, struggling to breathe.
"Hnnngggghhhh... can... I... please... see your... receipt, sir...?"
I stopped and turned.
"Old woman, these goods are now legally my property, and I will not tolerate any further harassment. Tell your friends I mean business."
I shot out her knee caps then cut her left hand off with my Swiss Army knife. After loading my goods into my car, I sped off into the sunset.
Men, this stuff that some sources sling around about America wanting out of this war, not wanting to fight, is a crock of bullshit. Americans love to fight, traditionally. All real Americans love the sting and clash of battle. You are here today for three reasons. First, because you are here to defend your homes and your loved ones. Second, you are here for your own self respect, because you would not want to be anywhere else. Third, you are here because you are real men and all real men like to fight. When you, here, everyone of you, were kids, you all admired the champion marble player, the fastest runner, the toughest boxer, the big league ball players, and the All-American football players. Americans love a winner. Americans will not tolerate a loser. Americans despise cowards. Americans play to win all of the time. I wouldn't give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed. That's why Americans have never lost nor will ever lose a war; for the very idea of losing is hateful to an American.
You are not all going to die. Only two percent of you right here today would die in a major battle. Death must not be feared. Death, in time, comes to all men. Yes, every man is scared in his first battle. If he says he's not, he's a liar. Some men are cowards but they fight the same as the brave men or they get the hell slammed out of them watching men fight who are just as scared as they are. The real hero is the man who fights even though he is scared. Some men get over their fright in a minute under fire. For some, it takes an hour. For some, it takes days. But a real man will never let his fear of death overpower his honor, his sense of duty to his country, and his innate manhood. Battle is the most magnificent competition in which a human being can indulge. It brings out all that is best and it removes all that is base. Americans pride themselves on being He Men and they ARE He Men. Remember that the enemy is just as frightened as you are, and probably more so. They are not supermen.
All through your Army careers, you men have bitched about what you call "chicken shit drilling". That, like everything else in this Army, has a definite purpose. That purpose is alertness. Alertness must be bred into every soldier. I don't give a fuck for a man who's not always on his toes. You men are veterans or you wouldn't be here. You are ready for what's to come. A man must be alert at all times if he expects to stay alive. If you're not alert, sometime, a German son-of-an-asshole-bitch is going to sneak up behind you and beat you to death with a sockful of shit!
There are four hundred neatly marked graves somewhere in Sicily. All because one man went to sleep on the job. But they are German graves, because we caught the bastard asleep before they did. An Army is a team. It lives, sleeps, eats, and fights as a team. This individual heroic stuff is pure horse shit. The bilious bastards who write that kind of stuff for the Saturday Evening Post don't know any more about real fighting under fire than they know about fucking!
We have the finest food, the finest equipment, the best spirit, and the best men in the world. Why, by God, I actually pity those poor sons-of-bitches we're going up against. By God, I do.
My men don't surrender. I don't want to hear of any soldier under my command being captured unless he has been hit. Even if you are hit, you can still fight back. That's not just bull shit either. The kind of man that I want in my command is just like the lieutenant in Libya, who, with a Luger against his chest, jerked off his helmet, swept the gun aside with one hand, and busted the hell out of the Kraut with his helmet. Then he jumped on the gun and went out and killed another German before they knew what the hell was coming off. And, all of that time, this man had a bullet through a lung. There was a real man!" "All of the real heroes are not storybook combat fighters, either. Every single man in this Army plays a vital role. Don't ever let up. Don't ever think that your job is unimportant. Every man has a job to do and he must do it. Every man is a vital link in the great chain. What if every truck driver suddenly decided that he didn't like the whine of those shells overhead, turned yellow, and jumped headlong into a ditch? The cowardly bastard could say, "Hell, they won't miss me, just one man in thousands". But, what if every man thought that way? Where in the hell would we be now? What would our country, our loved ones, our homes, even the world, be like? No, Goddamnit, Americans don't think like that. Every man does his job. Every man serves the whole. Every department, every unit, is important in the vast scheme of this war. The ordnance men are needed to supply the guns and machinery of war to keep us rolling. The Quartermaster is needed to bring up food and clothes because where we are going there isn't a hell of a lot to steal. Every last man on K.P. has a job to do, even the one who heats our water to keep us from getting the 'G.I. Shits'.
Each man must not think only of himself, but also of his buddy fighting beside him. We don't want yellow cowards in this Army. They should be killed off like rats. If not, they will go home after this war and breed more cowards. The brave men will breed more brave men. Kill off the Goddamned cowards and we will have a nation of brave men. One of the bravest men that I ever saw was a fellow on top of a telegraph pole in the midst of a furious fire fight in Tunisia. I stopped and asked what the hell he was doing up there at a time like that. He answered, "Fixing the wire, Sir". I asked, "Isn't that a little unhealthy right about now?" He answered, "Yes Sir, but the Goddamned wire has to be fixed". I asked, "Don't those planes strafing the road bother you?" And he answered, "No, Sir, but you sure as hell do!" Now, there was a real man. A real soldier. There was a man who devoted all he had to his duty, no matter how seemingly insignificant his duty might appear at the time, no matter how great the odds. And you should have seen those trucks on the rode to Tunisia. Those drivers were magnificent. All day and all night they rolled over those son-of-a-bitching roads, never stopping, never faltering from their course, with shells bursting all around them all of the time. We got through on good old American guts. Many of those men drove for over forty consecutive hours. These men weren't combat men, but they were soldiers with a job to do. They did it, and in one hell of a way they did it. They were part of a team. Without team effort, without them, the fight would have been lost. All of the links in the chain pulled together and the chain became unbreakable.
Don't forget, you men don't know that I'm here. No mention of that fact is to be made in any letters. The world is not supposed to know what the hell happened to me. I'm not supposed to be commanding this Army. I'm not even supposed to be here in England. Let the first bastards to find out be the Goddamned Germans. Some day I want to see them raise up on their piss-soaked hind legs and howl, 'Jesus Christ, it's the Goddamned Third Army again and that son-of-a-fucking-bitch Patton'."
We want to get the hell over there. The quicker we clean up this Goddamned mess, the quicker we can take a little jaunt against the purple pissing Japs and clean out their nest, too. Before the Goddamned Marines get all of the credit.
Sure, we want to go home. We want this war over with. The quickest way to get it over with is to go get the bastards who started it. The quicker they are whipped, the quicker we can go home. The shortest way home is through Berlin and Tokyo. And when we get to Berlin, I am personally going to shoot that paper hanging son-of-a-bitch Hitler. Just like I'd shoot a snake!
When a man is lying in a shell hole, if he just stays there all day, a German will get to him eventually. The hell with that idea. The hell with taking it. My men don't dig foxholes. I don't want them to. Foxholes only slow up an offensive. Keep moving. And don't give the enemy time to dig one either. We'll win this war, but we'll win it only by fighting and by showing the Germans that we've got more guts than they have; or ever will have. We're not going to just shoot the sons-of-bitches, we're going to rip out their living Goddamned guts and use them to grease the treads of our tanks. We're going to murder those lousy Hun cocksuckers by the bushel-fucking-basket. War is a bloody, killing business. You've got to spill their blood, or they will spill yours. Rip them up the belly. Shoot them in the guts. When shells are hitting all around you and you wipe the dirt off your face and realize that instead of dirt it's the blood and guts of what once was your best friend beside you, you'll know what to do!
I don't want to get any messages saying, "I am holding my position." We are not holding a Goddamned thing. Let the Germans do that. We are advancing constantly and we are not interested in holding onto anything, except the enemy's balls. We are going to twist his balls and kick the living shit out of him all of the time. Our basic plan of operation is to advance and to keep on advancing regardless of whether we have to go over, under, or through the enemy. We are going to go through him like crap through a goose; like shit through a tin horn!
From time to time there will be some complaints that we are pushing our people too hard. I don't give a good Goddamn about such complaints. I believe in the old and sound rule that an ounce of sweat will save a gallon of blood. The harder WE push, the more Germans we will kill. The more Germans we kill, the fewer of our men will be killed. Pushing means fewer casualties. I want you all to remember that.
There is one great thing that you men will all be able to say after this war is over and you are home once again. You may be thankful that twenty years from now when you are sitting by the fireplace with your grandson on your knee and he asks you what you did in the great World War II, you WON'T have to cough, shift him to the other knee and say, "Well, your Granddaddy shoveled shit in Louisiana." No, Sir, you can look him straight in the eye and say, "Son, your Granddaddy rode with the Great Third Army and a Son-of-a-Goddamned-Bitch named Georgie Patton!"
Basically I have just figured out our governments biggest conspiracy. Obama rhymes with llama. Llamas are large animals that have wool for protection against cold. It is very cold in northern Russia. Russia has nukes. Japan was the only country nuked in ww2. Japan was nuked 2 times. 2 times 2 is four. a llama has 4 legs and 4 feet. If you shave a llama you have enough wool for 4 coats for small children. Obama has children. Obama has two children. 2 time s 2 is 4 and 4 divided by 2 is 2. If you add 2 + 2 it equals four and if you subtract 2 from 4 it equals 2. The second letter in Obama is B and the fourth letter in Barack is C. C is the 3rd letter in the alphabet and B is the second letter in the alphabet. Coincidence? No. Llamas cannot read the alphabet and neithe can Obama because he is a Llama. I hope this use your information it because very i mportant.