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CSB Alternate Storylines

Antonizoon edited this page Feb 25, 2014 · 6 revisions

A series of posts made by anons to troll other users. Some of them even became interesting alternative fanfiction in their own right.

Cool Story Bro: "Fuck me. Literally."

Starts from OP's post 1229976. Daniel's famous last words are, "Fuck me." But anons imagine an alternate world where the girl takes it literally.


At this moment, I didn't know what to do... I had been thinking about it, for what felt like hours. I still couldn't decide whether I was going to show any remorse or not.

I sat down on the couch that had been turned into a temporary bed, not making eye contact with her, I sighed, not knowing what to do.. Before I could act or even think of something to say I felt her soft, shaking hand slowly caress my lower back, I looked her in the eye and all I could see was pain and regret. She started moving her body closer to mine, with small, subtle movements. She then looked up at me and said "I need you right now, I'm sorry for what I did, but I've always liked you... And you're all I have at the moment" What was she doing? What was she thinking?

Cool Story Bro: The Jumper

In this storyline, the girl attempts to kill herself. It starts from OP's post 1230093 in the actual story.

Eventually, the OP had to use a tripcode to keep up his story:

Ghost writer has made it hard to read this thread, but it should be easy enough to follow my style of writing, life is not nearly as dramatic as this guys fantasies unfortunately, although from the gist of his posts it would have made for a pretty cool story too. ill be using this trip from now on.


Then she spoke up. "I'm sorry for leaving you so soon. I knew that I shouldn't have left you for that jerk!" I turned to look at her, and I saw she was still crying.

Our eyes met for a while, but she quickly averted my gaze. She put her glass down on the coffee table, and stopped crying for a while. "Oh God, oh God, could you ever forgive me for treating you like such a jerk?" She sobbed. "I'll never be the same as I was. How could I ever left you?"

She started to hit her head on the armrest of the sofa-bed. I quickly stopped her. "No," she sobbed. "It's too late, I tell you." Suddenly she leapt out of the bed and made a dash to the balcony.

I quickly stopped her. "What do you think you are doing?" I hissed. She looked forlorn. "I'm so sorry I left you. And I feel that only my death would show how sorry I am for leaving you!"

I panicked. What would I do? I definitely couldn't let her die like that; I'd get in trouble with the cops. I tried to calm her down.


But she kept lunging for the balcony. I begged for her to stop, but she kept lunging for the balcony. Down below, the lights of the city shone brightly, as though tempting me to let go.

I was about to release when she suddenly fell down limp to the floor, sobbing. "I can't do this! Not for you, not for me, not for the baby in me!" I let go in shock. Baby? What baby? She definitely wasn't showing any signs of pregnancy.

"I'm sorry. The other day, I checked. I was pregnant. And was I so happy! But that jerk just had to ruin it. First he used it to prevent me seeing my friends, then going out to shop, and finally to even leave the house! He told me that if I ever left him, he would make sure that I would end up penniless and on the street with a baby. And what could I do? He had all the money, heck, even the house I lived in!"

She broke into tears again. I could only stare at her.


"So, what'd you want me to do then? Take you back in?" She nodded.

I looked around my cramped apartment. There was only a bedroom, kitchen, living room and a spare room that I used for storage and the like. It was small, but that was the bare minimum I could manage as a struggling writer in the middle of Chicago.

"I...I don't think I can ever manage to take you in. There's just not enough room for the both of us. And besides, I'm already struggling to pay the bills here. I sure as hell can't manage to feed you, unless you start doing sonme decent work.

She stared at me. "What? Are you throwing me out into the streets? When it's still in the middle of winter? I'll freeze to death." I sighed. Now was I going to let a girl who had once broken my heart and stomped on the pieces back into my life? Or was I going to let her die a pauper, cold and frozen in the streets the way I had always hoped she would turn out?

My cold heart for her was already beginning to warm with the fires of compassion. I definitely couldn't let her down, but then...


She turned to face me in a huff, but then one glance at my unmoved face revealed that I was serious. " mean that if you want me back in I'll have to work?" I nodded. "Sorry. No free rides, girl." She sobbed. "Fine, then. I'll leave you in your sorry old apartment, and don't be sorry if you ever happen to see me dead in the snow!"

With that, she turned around and stormed out of the apartment and slammed the door for a moment. I couldn't help but shed a tear at her plight. I glanced at her half-drunk cup of tea. I just couldn't bring to pour it out. I just glanced at it, imagining her sorry shape still lying on the sofa.

With a deep sigh, I walked over to the door and peeped out in case she was still there. But the corridor was empty. There was no trace of her. She had gone with the frigid January wind.


The next day I was walking over to the nearby K-Mart to buy some groceries. I hugged my windbreaker tightly against me to insulate me from the cold when I saw a familiar figure lying in a snowdrift.

It was her. She seemed blue. I quickly ran towards her to feel her pulse. It was faint and weak. Suddenly her eyes flickered open. "What...what are you doing here? Are you trying to finish me off?"

She staggered to her feet, shivering continuously due to the extreme cold. I immediately felt a twinge of pity for her, but struggled to hide my feelings from her. She didn't want her the other day.

I swallowed my feelings. Of course her boyfriend was always a jerk, but could I ever afford to take her back? She was poor, penniless, and soon I would have to end up paying for a third soul which was never mine in the first place.

It was too big a gamble, too big to risk my reputation for. Heck, if her boyfriend called the cops, my dream would be ruined. Forever. I mulled this over. But then, could I ever live with my conscience if she died as I did nothing?


"Please, please just bring me home. I'll do anything for you!" I pondered her offer. Somehow her white, shivering knuckles and her poor, emaciated state started to warm my heart.

But what use was there for me to bring her home if all she was going to do was to strain my finances waiting for the next perfect boyfriend to come along? I made up my mind. "Come." I led her to the K Mart that I was going to anyway. I pulled out a crisp 20 dollar note from my wallet. Spend it however you like. I'll do my own shopping while you do yours. Meet me when you're done at this same spot.

I knew 20 dollars was a lot for me, but then I couldn't let her die. Besides, I was planning to test her, to see whether she had still kept her crazy spending habits. It was a gamble for me, and for her too. After I made sure she was out of my sight, I walked over and bought a box of ramen.

And returned to my corner. Waiting for her. Would she bail on me? Would she return? Would she still be the same? People kept giving me odd looks as I stood there, looking like a fool. And so I waited, glancing at my watch.


Five minutes passed. And then ten. Then fifteen. And a cashier actually walked from his spot to tell me that I was blocking to the exit. Finally thirty minutes passed, and she reappeared, looking warmer and healthier than when I first found her. She was checking out a decent jacket that would at least protect her from the cold. I winked at her; she winked back. Purchases done, she walked over to me.

"You know, I was quite tempted to bail and spend my money on some drugs. But then I thought of you, and how bad you must feel for me self-flagellating myself. I managed a soft smile. How could I have been so cruel to her?

Then as I was basking in the warm glow of her accepting me, she suddenly asked me, "So, does that mean I can come back with you?" My heart welled with pity for her once more.

With a half hearted sigh, I demurred. Her face instantly lit up and she squealed with delight. "Yaay! Let's go now!" I glared at her. People were already starting to stare at us. She noticed and immediately quietened down.

I broke the tension. "Let's... just walk home."

So the both of us began the long walk home, in the face of the chill wind. She kept close to me all the while. We reached my apartment after a while.

And entered.


After all these years.

Cool Story Bro: Fucking in the Shower

Disgusting Sexual Fantasy. Involving showers. And shit. From 1253371, thread 2.



As we both stood there naked in the warm shower, I could feel myself eventually getting harder. She saw my hardness and leaned over to me. I was expecting her to kiss me, but instead she whispered in my ear "I want you to fuck me in the arse."

I didn't have to be asked twice, and as she bent over and placed her palms on the wall of the shower, I manoeuvred myself into the correct position. As the tip went into her perfect brown rose, I heard her moan slightly and felt her shudder. As I started pumping, I remembered all the things she'd done to me; taking my money, breaking my heart, crushing my confidence. I began to wonder if it was fair for her to get of scot free. And I had the perfect way to get her back.

Just as we were getting started, I suddenly picked up the pace, filling her with 10 inches of my cock. I heard her wince, and ask me to slow down, but at this point no was not an option.

As she tried to get off my dick, I held her by the neck as I fucked her arse harder and harder. She started to struggle, and it was getting uncomfortable, so I punched her in the back of the head a few times to shut her up.

Then, as I was pumping away into her , I heard something give. It was her sphincter, and I felt the unfamiliar sensation of blood mixing in with the precum and water that was already lubricating her gaping hole. I kept fucking, and by now she was whimpering like she was when I first found her. I felt a new feeling on the tip of my dick, hard, and yet it did give if i pushed enough. I felt it slowly encompass my shaft, like a bizarre fleshlight. I decided to pull out to inspect, and to my horror I found my dick encased in a turd. This wasn't acceptable, so I turned her around, shoving my scat covered member deep into her throat. After about five minutes of throat fucking her, I came, right down her neck. She was on the floor, a complete mess, and I looked down at her.

"Now you can stay with me"

Cool Story Bro: Tripcode Cracked

Suddenly, near the ending a troll story is posted; but this time with the same tripcode as the OP. Did his tripcode get cracked? Or is the OP for real this time?

Starts from 1253327 in the second thread.


"Will" I said, lightly tapping the tip of her nose with my finger "Will?" "Yeah Will... What do you think?" Her eyes widened and then filled with rage, "I HATE IT YOU LOSER!" she screamed, I instantly felt beta and started mumbling "B-But Bri" "Shut up! Stop taking so many showers too! Whats wrong with you!?", I started feeling nervous and I went to put my hands in my towel to tighten it when suddenly I felt a little bit sticky, as I took my hands out spaghetti dropped out and rolled across the floor, "IS THAT SPAGHETTI!?" She said, raising her voice louder, "I... but... umm..." I said, clammering to get some words out, she turned and went into the bedroom, "You're sick Dan! You need help! Why did you beat up my ex-boyfriends friend anyway? he was only trying to look out for his friend and you almost killed him!", She came out of the bedroom fully dressed and opened the front door, "I'm going back to his place, I'd rather be with someone who beats me than a pathetic loser who takes spaghetti into the shower!", she turned around to look at me and she averted her eyes in disgust, "Eugh" She muttered, slamming the door.



"Baby wait! PLEASE! I LOVE YOU!" I shouted, running down after her, she took my car but I kmew where she was going, I ran to the bus stop and managed to jump on the bus just as it was pulling away, the driver looked angry, "Got any fare?" He said, looking at my bath towel, I took some spaghetti from the crease in my towel and squished it into the coin slot along with 3 meatballs, he smiled and saluted before issuing an all-day ticket, "Good luck my friend" he said as I took the ticket and walked up the bus leaving a trail of sauce to the back where there was an empty seat, I thought my immidiate troubles were over but then a group of black people started staring at me, I got scared and looked away out of the windows, but one behind me tapped my shoulder and said "S'cuse me bruv, but is that sauce yours?", pointing to the red trail leading the way to my seat from the door, I wiped the sweat from my brow leaving a thick red sauce spot on my forehead, "Bruv, for someone who looks like dey just cum out da shower you iz well dirty en it", I started sweating violently and my mouth clammed up, making me unable to speak, another black kid looked over and said "WOAH MAN LOOKA THAT ASS KRAK HAHA WHITEY GOT AN NICE ASS MAN!", all of a sudden all the black people jumped up and one took out a ghetto blaster, they pulled me up into the walkway as they danced around me screaming "WHOOP DERE IT IZ! WHOOP DEREIT IZ!" I was scared and all I could think about was having a shower



they followed me off the bus and one of them kept stealing the spaghetti out of my pocket and eating is "DAYUM THIS SKETTI IS FRESH NIGGA!" he screamed as the sauce ran down his face, as I got to the top of the stairs and knocked on the door the fat man opened it up and punched me in the towel, the sauce squelched out and went all over the black guy and his stereo causing it to short out, "YO MENZ DIS WHITE BOI HEAH KILLED DA CHOONZ! GETTIM!" they screamed as they piled on top of him, as I pushed through the fight into the flat where I saw Will and Betty making out on the bed as Betty slapped her, "NOW YOU KNOW!" she screamed as she jumped up "I TOLD YOU TO STAY AWAY!" she shuffled towards the balcony and before I could stop her she lept off doing the dinosaur before she fell anf splattered on the street below, one of the black guys who followed me in said "YO DATZ COLD! GET HERE WHITE BITCH!" and started fucking betty on the bed until she was a pile of goo, his black hard cock mashing her into a fine paste as she screamed, after witnessing that horror I went into the bathroom and locked the door, turning the shower on and washing my sauce stained body, suddenly the water formed into a beautiful girl and she said "I always loved you more than anyone Dan, now that she is dead we can be together, kiss me", I kissed her and drowned, then I became a zora and lived with the water spirit. The end.


5/10 took too long


1254110 (Archivist)

That is the most epic shit I've ever seen. Amazing, worth it.


The fuck is this?
I seriously hope your trip was cracked, because that's just the shittiest way to end a long story.

1254149 (Archivist)

I am thinking the trip was cracked, I think I managed to crack it, haven't tried it though
it was something obvious
Either way pretty funny.

1254157 (OP)


lol you guys asked for a troll ending and I gave you one, cmon, you had to have laughed! I have the original ending ready to post too, haha.


not a bad false ending. I liked the "WHOOP DERE IT IZ" the best. Now on we the real ending please.

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