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here i sit at my computer about to write my review of the recent action comedy " bait " starring jamie foxx and david morse .
this is a review i don't even want to write because i'd just be laying the same criticisms on it that i would with any other so-generic-and-predictable-it's-beyond-ridiculous piece of hollywood fluff .
if they're not going to give us , the audience , just a little credit and put something together with half a brain , why should i waste my time and mental energy criticising it ?
last summer i took this same approach with my review of " the mummy , " in that review i just quoted phrases my reviews of other sub-par movies .
i think i shall do the same thing here but with a few less quotes ( not all are applicable ) .
i hope this goes to show you what i think of " bait " and why you can find out all you need to know about it without having to take a wild guess .
it's genuinely unfunny ( i , and the other audience members only laughed once during the entire two hours ) , unoriginal and unthrilling .
it's not so bad to the point where it's fun to watch because of its badness and it's no so bad you absolute loathe it and are pained by watching it , it's just such a cliche in and of itself , that , uhh . . .
lost my train of thought .
anyways , here's those quotes , enjoy !
" getting an audience's attention right from the beginning plays a major role in how today's films work .
we want to have something exciting to watch , not a slow build-up of a story ( god forbid ! ) , and this film plays right into the mainstream's hands . . . "
- review of " armageddon . "
" it's clear the film doesn't want to waste time on reality and thus the attempt to establish plausability ( the most minimal amount necessary ) comes across as a half-assed effort .
supporting characters and shady sup-plots are introduced , but as is the case with films made up of a large cast of characters , only a handful have any real significance . . .
there's a fine line separating homage from plagiarism . . . , " - review of " godzilla " ( 1998 )
" unfortunately , as is the case with most modern thrillers , once the film showed potential for authenticity and intelligence , the cliches and action sequences take over , " - review of " the jackal . "
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