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in this re-make of the 1954 japanese monster film , godzilla is transformed into a " jurassic park " copy who swims from the south pacific to new york for no real reason and trashes the town .
although some of the destruction is entertaining for a while , it gets old fast .
the film often makes no sense ( a several-hundred foot tall beast hides in subway tunnels ) , sports second-rate effects ( the baby godzillas seem to be one computer effect multiplied on the screen ) , lame jokes ( mayor ebert and his assistant gene are never funny ) , horrendous acting ( even matthew broderick is dull ) and an unbelievable love story ( why would anyone want to get back together with maria pitillo's character ? ) .
there are other elements of the film that fall flat , but going on would just be a waste of good words .
only for die-hard creature feature fans , this might be fun if you could check your brain at the door .
i couldn't .
( michael redman has written this column for 23 years and has seldom had a more disorienting cinematic experience than seeing both " fear and loathing " and " godzilla " in the same evening . )