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long time buddies and neil diamond tribute band members wayne ( steve zahn , " happy , texas " ) and j . d . ( jack black , " high fidelity " ) watch in horror as third mate darren silverman ( jason biggs , " american pie " ) disappears under the thumb of his new fiance judith , ( amanda peet , " the whole nine yards " ) a controlling psychiatrist .
they're doubly troubled when the return of darren's 'one and only love' sandy perkins ( amanda detmer , " final destination " ) returns to their home town but doesn't cause a ripple in darren's devotion to judith .
there's only one thing wayne and j . d . can think of doing - they kidnap judith and fake her death in " saving silverman . "
written by hank nelken and greg depaul after seeing a friend engaged to the wrong woman , " saving silverman " is directed by 'hit comedy director' dennis dugan of such films as " big daddy , " " brain donors " and " problem child . "
it's a dismal , third-rate farrelly brothers rip off that attempts to milk humor from such inspired bits of whimsy as having darren's love interest come from a family of circus freaks and be about to become a nun .
gross out gags include a visualization of darren getting butt cheek implants .
" saving silverman " is almost saved by stars zahn and black .
these two are so comically talented they can take bad material and still deliver the goods .
they're in " animal house " mode while the rest of the film trawls along and comes up empty .
jason biggs can attribute his entire career to the luck of having been cast in the smash hit " american pie . "
peet shows some physical moves but no flair for comedy here while detmer slaps a brave , sweet smile onto her face and soldiers through .
r . lee ermey ( " full metal jacket " ) is one note in an embarrassing performance as a psychopathic ex-football coach .
neil diamond appears at the film's climax as himself and miraculously enlivens the proceedings by belting out some of his old standards .