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hav plenty , as we are told in the beginning and reminded during the film , is a true story .
life itself is a series of true stories , but most are not movie material .
as scripted , directed , and acted by cinematic newcomer christopher scott cherot , hav plenty limps along at best .
its dialog is so stilted - " you know what they say , 'no women ; no cry . ' "
- that the actors are content to read the screenplay rather than invest much energy in trying to act it .
in the story , lee plenty ( cherot ) is a 28-year-old author and teaching assistant .
the movie , which happens mainly over the new year's holiday , consists of a series of incidents in which various single and married women try to kiss lee or take him to bed .
since he consistently refuses , caroline gooden ( tammi katherine jones ) figures that he must be gay .
eventually he and havilland " hav " savage ( chenoa maxwell ) get together , proving that he wasn't gay after all , just picky .
sexy women can sit on his lap and ask him to go to bed with them , but he will not even kiss them .
he's a man who knows his mind , which he frequently shares directly with the audience in a series of trite and overly cute monologues .
filled with wealthy african-americans , the story is closest in tone to love jones , which was better .
hav plenty's story doesn't go anywhere .
at the end it subjects us to lee plenty's new film , which is a movie of the movie we've just seen , but with even worse acting .
" remember folks that , as outrageous as this all seems , this is a true story . "
hav tells the camera , but the problem is that it's not outrageous at all or even the least bit interesting .
hav plenty isn't so much a bad film as it is a total waste of the audience's time .
hav plenty runs 1 : 32 .
it is rated r for profanity and would be fine for most teenagers .