openssl: fix ECH logic

[bagder]

• on error, bail out proper
• remove unused #define

[testclutch]

Analysis of PR #15814 at dc194b3d:

Test 1009 failed, which has NOT been flaky recently, so there could be a real issue in this PR.

Test http/test_02_download.py::TestDownload::test_02_31_parallel_upgrade failed, which has NOT been flaky recently, so there could be a real issue in this PR.

Test 498 failed, which has NOT been flaky recently, so there could be a real issue in this PR.

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