Hello.
Hi. I'm calling about the ad for the apartment found in today's newspaper.
Okay.
I'm kind of desperate, and I need something right away.
Okay. What would you like to know?
First of all, how big is it?
It's a two-bedroom apartment with a living room, dining room and kitchen, and one bathroom. There's also a place for a washer and dryer.
Okay, and how old is the apartment complex?
Well, let's just say it has a lot of history. To be honest, my great grandfather built it during the 1920s, but it's a very sturdy and sound structure.
Oh, and ... so, is the apartment furnished at all?
Oh, yeah. The apartment is partially furnished with a refrigerator, stove, and my grandmother's old dishwasher.
Your grandmother's old dishwasher? Okay. What's the rent?
It's $950 a month.
Whoa. That is a little steep for me.
But you could always split the cost with a roommate.
Perhaps. Does that include utilities?
Well, the rent includes gas and electricity, but not the phone bill. And the water pump is right out the back door.
Water pump!
Yeah.
Oh, yeah. Well, can I rent month-to-month, or do I have to sign a lease for a longer period of time?
We require a 6-month commitment for the apartment, and if you cancel the agreement anytime during that period, hey ... you lose your deposit.
Oh, and how much is the deposit?
It's $400, and, of course, this money is used to repair damage or general wear and tear on our apartment, like the leaks in the old roof from last year's snow storm. Man, that was ugly. Plaster falling down from the ceiling. And I didn't even know there was a rat's nest up there, but we got that taken care of.
A what? Do I get my deposit back after I move out? That's assuming that I even move in.
Generally speaking, we return the deposit, minus a small fee for, you know, cleaning the apartment for the next tenant, but if you trash the place, then don't expect to get anything back.
Okay. Oh, um ... how close is the apartment to the university campus?
It's about eight blocks from campus, but you can catch a number of busses right out in front.
Oh, so, then, if there's a busy road out front, is it noisy?
Well, there are always trade-offs: it's a little noisy with the road outside and the airport behind you, but the place is really convenient because there's a supermarket and shopping center right across the street. Just keep the windows closed and a pair of ear plugs handy, and you'll be fine.
Okay, and one last question. Are there parking spaces for tenants?
Yeah. The apartment has two covered parking spaces, which are really convenient during certain times of the year.
Uh ... I don't know. Is it possible for me to drop by and visit the apartment tomorrow morning?
Sure, but just remember we rent the apartment on a first-come, first-serve basis, so there's no guarantee it'll still be available then.
Okay. Thanks. Um ... and where exactly is the apartment located?
It's one block west of the waste water treatment plant.
Ah .... Are pets allowed?
Well, you can keep small pets like a hamster in a small cage, but we don't allow larger animals like dogs, cats, or snakes. Things like that.
Um, I have a rat ...
You don't have anything like that, do you?
Well, I have a rat that I keep in a cage. Will that be okay?
Well, as long it doesn't escape, I guess that's okay.
And what's your name?
It's Norman. Norman Bates.
Alright, Mr. Bates. I'll see you tomorrow. Bye.