Hey, neighbor. How's it going?
Fine. How about you?
Okay. Huh, by the way, my wife and I are going out of town this weekend, and I was wondering if you could take care of some of our animals while we're gone. You know our dog, Jaws, don't you?
Yeah. My leg still hurts from the last incident.
Hey, he's just a playful little beast.
Right.
Hey, he likes to bark a little, and his bark is worse than his bite.
Oh yeah.
Just feed him a can of dog food a day, and make sure he has plenty of water in his dish.
Oh.
And then, take him for a walk around the block.
Well, how about if I just throw a Frisbee over the fence to give him some exercise? Wouldn't that work?
Ah, and then, he likes to watch the 3:00 soap opera on Channel 4..
What?
... and brush his teeth after you give you some doggie treats around 4:00.
Man, you really pamper your dog.
And, then brush his fur for about twenty minutes. He tends to shed this time of year.
Ah, what?
And then scratch him around the ears. Otherwise, he feels neglected.
Is that it?
Well, and then there's Claws.
Claws? Who's Claws.
Oh, he's the cat we adopted from the animal shelter, but he's a little temperamental.
What do you mean 'temperamental'?
Well, he has mood swings.
Mood swings?
Yes, but he's been doing better since he's been going to the animal therapist.
A therapist?
So, be sure to feed him a half cup of cat food two times a day.
What? A therapist ...
Right, and don't forget to put out on some soft classical music during his nap time at 2:40 p.m. But don't let him out of the house because he might run away and chase the neighbor's dog.
You have some high-maintenance animals.
Not really. And, don't forget to change the cat litter daily, or he might have an accident on the carpet.
Oh, great.
And finally, there's Buttercup.
Buttercup? Who's Buttercu ...? I'm afraid to ask.
Ah, she's a sweetie.
What?
... if you know how to handle her right.
Oh, great.
Wait. Let me get her for you. Here you are.
That's ... That's a snake ...
Hold her.
That's a big snake with big fangs. Does the snake go to a therapist, too?
Of course not ... just an anger-management class.
Oh! What?
I'm joking. Buttercup is a very docile creature, and she never bites anyone she likes. If she doesn't, you'll know because she starts hissing and staring at you ... kind like what she's doing now.
Well, I'm leaving. You must be going out of you mind to think I'm going to watch a zoo full of misunderstood animals. You'd better hire some professional help 'cause I wouldn't watch them even if you paid me a million dollars.