Waiter! I'd like to speak to the manager please... immediately if possible.
Is anything wrong, Madam?
I'm afraid there is. The service here has been terrible. We had to wait twenty minutes for a glass of mineral water.
I see. Well I'm sorry to hear that. The trouble is that we're a bit sort of hands at present. Two waitresses are ill.
All right, but that's no excuse. My husband asked for goose and he was brought chicken instead. It's just unbelievable! And my beans weren't cooked properly. It wasn't a very enjoyable meal at all.
This is most regrettable.
Look at this bill. We've been overcharged. We only had one dessert, not two. Can you check the bill again, please?
I do apologize, Madam.
I'm afraid I'm not going to pay the service charge, or give a tip, as I don't feel satisfied with it. I'm quite disappointed as a matter of fact.
I'll pass on your complaints to the manager right away.