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The connect_narf.pl script morses the IP + "connected" when a user connects to filebitchs proftpd server. The disconnect_narf.pl scritp will do the obvious opposite. It will hopefully drive someone crazy. To make it run you need to add some lines to your proftpd config. I decided not to let Krebs do this as I didn't want to break your FTP Server (I know FTP is broken by default). The 5 necessary lines are: <IfModule mod_exec.c> ExecEngine on ExecOnConnect "/krebs/filebitch/connect_narf.pl %a" ExecOnExit "/krebs/filebitch/disconnect_narf.pl %a" </IfModule>