1.17 Fix: Revert reflector changes of PR #83520 to fix #86483 #86791

[jpbetz]

What type of PR is this?

/kind bug

What this PR does / why we need it:

#83520 caused a regression in v1.17.0. Reflector relists are causing master rolling upgrade to fail for large clusters due to excessive list calls to etcd. See #86483.

Per #86430 (comment), we're reverting the reflector changes of #83520 in 1.17.

Which issue(s) this PR fixes:

Fixes #86483

Special notes for your reviewer:

This rolls back only the reflector changes. The server side changes were already tested for backward compatibility with old reflectors and are safe.

The pager change is left in place since they are unrelated to the regression. Note that #85272 is related and should be considered when reviewing.

Does this PR introduce a user-facing change?:

Fix v1.17.0 regression in reflector relist causing master rolling upgrade to fail for large clusters due to excessive list calls to etcd

/cc @wojtek-t @liggitt @smarterclayton

/sig api-machinery

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[liggitt]

/retest
/lgtm
/approve

[liggitt]

/priority critical-urgent
/kind bug

Once this is merged, we will rerun the scale HA upgrade test scenario on the 1.17 branch (this was already run with this fix to verify it resolved the bug, but will be verified post-merge as well)

[liggitt]

cc @kubernetes/patch-release-team for plans and timing of manual test post merge

[justaugustus]

Patch Release Team approval:
/lgtm
/approve

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[APPROVALNOTIFIER] This PR is APPROVED

This pull-request has been approved by: jpbetz, justaugustus, liggitt

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[wojtek-t]

@mm4tt will run the final tests to make a final confirmation for the release branch

[mm4tt]

I ran the test from at kubernetes:release-1.17 head today and can confirm that revert fixed the problem.

If someone is interested the grafana for the test can be found here