Hello I'm really hungry and thirsty and want some food and water if that's ok with you. 
Well some is okay but not all. The thing is that we left in a hurry and forgot to pick up the bag with the extra food items. I am sorry but we have kids with us so we will need the food. Am sure you understand ☹️
Fair enough I understand that you have hungry kids. If I give you the majority of food can I get a majority of the other two items?
Well, what if I take all food and 1 water and you take the rest. Will that work for you? we do have enough firewood.
No I was thinking I would get all the waters and you get 1 firewood or I get one food 2 waters and 2 firewood. 
We packed enough water but the kids spilled some so I just wanted to make sure we have additional water in case we run out. But we can do with only 1 water. We do really need the food though ☹️
So do I. I'm trying to bulk up because I've been skinny all my life. ☹️ Let me just get one please☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️
well we do not want to be unreasonable. How about we take 2 food, 2 water then just in case they can be satisfied with the extra water. In that case you get 1 food, 1 water and all firewood. 
That is not too fair neither of us need firewood. It would be most fair if you got two of your biggest need and I got two of the others. 
so you do not need the firewood at all? in that case i can take 2 food, 1 water and 2 firewood. You can take 1 food,2 waters and 1 firewood.