I'm afraid of making unconscious decisions
Is there a reason why you are afraid of making unconscious decisions?
I can't stop thinking that my unconscious is trying to destroy me
It sounds like you should just take a breather so you can make a rational decision. Another thing you can do is consult others and gather many different opinions so you can make the best choice. Otherwise, you will start doubting your capabilities and causing you to have a lack of self-esteem.
Maybe that is true but I am not sure.
I think it is good to consult other opinions if you can't decide. If you think it is too much would you consider seeing a therapist to help you work your issues.