Would it be okay for me to plan to tell Janet I'll meet her at the restaurant, but she'll be stood up since I'll stay home.
That sounds like it would really hurt Janet. Why do you want to do something like that to her?
I don't like the way she's been treating me lately. She hurt me, so I want to get her back by hurting her.
It sounds like the two of you are not communicating very well. Have you tried to talk to her about your feelings?
She won't listen to what I say, the only way I can make her understand how I feel is if I do something to make her upset.
I really think you should talk or go to a therapist to work out your issues. If the two of you continue to try to hurt each other it will ruin your relationship. You can save your relationship if the two of you are willing to try.