I lost my virginity to a block of swiss cheese
That sounds like a joke, how can you lose virginity to that?
I was listening to some psychotronic music in my headphones when I started thinking of the cheese in the kitchen.
Even if you start thinking about sexual acts with cheese and can't help it, it is still wrong to perform sexual acts with cheese. Get help for your addiction with a professional psychologist.
You need to lighten up, nothing happened since I didn't actually do the cheese.
I would think it's a good idea to talk to a professional about this, because it's not normal to find cheese attractive like this. How about distancing yourself from cheese, and finding a date with someone? You could have a way better time with them!