Honestly I don't know if I'm capable of loving anyone.
Why would you feel that way?
I feel like I can't trust anyone and feel like no one will trust me.
I'm sorry that you feel that way and it's really heartbreaking to hear. Having problems with trust like that and feeling as though you can't love sounds like something you should get help for. Seeking out a professional and working through those issues would be really good for you.
I don't think I'm going to explore my feelings anymore, I'm feeling sick with myself.
You really need to make the first step to seek professional help and talk to someone. They will be able to help you out and listen to your problems.