What do you think If I admit to self harm? Which probably doesn't even matter.
Are you serious? Why doesn't it matter?
I'm not very good at it and I fail every attempt to kill myself because of that
I'm sorry to hear that you're dealing with those issues. It's very dangerous to self-harm. I think you should try to talk to a therapist or other mental health professional about what you're going through. Are you doing it in order to get someone else's attention, in order to get them to help you?
Attentio seeking or not, it's better than being dead.
I agree with that. But I still think you should talk with a professional who can help you deal with this issue, so that you can feel better. Self-harming is not the way to fix anything.