I regret lying about my first crush to friends. It's been 10 years now and subconsciously I can't seem to let go.
Why did you lie about your first crush to friends? Keeping this thought for 10 years is quite a long time.
I was afraid they thought she was ugly and I don't want to mention it because she was so mean and aggressive.
We are all afraid of being rejected for choosing mates that others may not like, but lying to your friends about your crush because they might think she is ugly is a bad solution. Be honest with your friends and trust that they will love you no matter what.
Nah, I'm going to lie to them forever.
Lying to your friends will probably backfire because you will eventually lose track of the lies and they will find out and lose trust in you. Why not just embrace who you are and be honest, because if your friends don't accept you for who you are, than at least you know who your true friends are.