I want my 3 year old to not run the household
Why would you let a 3 year old control your home?
My 3 year old is running the whole household.
Don't let your kids run the home when you are the adult decision maker. You have to take responsibility of your kids actions.
I'm a failure, and my kid is a great asshole.
Don't give up just yet. It's your responsibility as their parent to get your child back on track. If you don't put them back on the right path their behavior will only get worse.