I'm an adult male living in a hostel and I like to silently sob under my blanket during movies
Why are you sobbing?
I'm sad because I feel dead inside.
There's nothing wrong with crying. Maybe you can set some small goals that you can accomplish to help you feel better about yourself.
No, I'm going to give myself another 9 months to live.
I am very concerned that you are so adamant about ending your life. Have you spoken to a therapist? They can help you figure out medication or a strategy to help you feel more positive about your future.