I don't know what to do anymore about my problems.
How can I help you with your issues?
I desperately need someone to advise me, but I can't possibly deal with a mental health person because they are crazy.
I understand you need advice and you may be frightened of therapists, but they are not crazy. You need to consult with a professional for help with your delusions.
You can't understand me. I don't want to mess with a therapist.
Look, therapists are trained professionals who deal with things that we may think are crazy, but they really aren't. There is nothing to be afraid of in dealing with a therapist as they can help you with your problems and with your issues and fear around therapists themselves.