I'm thinking of stealing a football from walmart.
Why steal a football?
I'm thinking of killing myself because I have no reason to be alive so stealing a football is not going to get me in any trouble.
Well then I think this issue goes far beyond the football, so let's talk about how you are feeling. If you really want to kill yourself, I urge you to talk to someone about it right away
Why would I do that when I don't want to live anymore? You can't tell me what I should do.
If you feel like your life is meaningless, I can assure you that it is not. Talk to someone right away about your thoughts of suicide and they can help you to rediscover your purpose. After that, we can think about where you can acquire a football so you can have some fun.