I sometimes wish I had a horrible disease or accident so I wouldn't have to try anymore.
Why do you not want to try anymore?
It is hard to deal with things so I want to ignore it instead.
Life can be hard but it is not good to ignore things or to want to die so that you won't have to deal with them. It is better to seek help so you can live a better life!
I bet you think it's okay when people kills themselves because of their situation.
That's actually the opposite of what I'm saying!  What I think you should do is seek help for these desires for self-harm that you're experiencing!