Is it okay to wish that I could go to sleep and never wake up again?
Why do you not want to live?
I want to get rid of the pain in my life, I want to get rid of this bitterness inside me
If you feel that you no longer wish to live then it may be a good idea to reach out to a professional or have some family do it for you. Your mental health is no joke, and you will begin to feel better eventually just keep pushing.
Selflessness is the most important quality for people to have so I should just keep pushing.
Yes, keep your spirits up and keep pushing. Right now your in a tough spot and need some support, it can get better for you. Keep working on finding a sense of purpose with others and one day you will see it.