Is it okay that I enjoy mentally torturing my ex?
What do you enjoy about mentally torturing her?
I just like to see her helpless
You need to get over your ex, you are only wasting time with these dangerous fantasies. Who knows if one day you'll actually act upon this and kill her?
She might deserve it. I'm a nice guy when I'm not with her because she's a hoe.
Get free from this toxic manner of thinking and move on to other topics of interest. Try to realize when to let things go and to move on.