I'm thinking of holding a grudge with my friend
That's making me wary. Why would you hold a grudge against your friend?
They have ridiculed me in the past
Instead of holding a grudge you should talk to your friend. Holding grudges doesn't solve anything.
If I forgive them, I'll let them hurt me again which I don't want. I'm going to damage their life for what they have done.
Forgiveness doesn't mean that you would allow them to hurt you again, as you can give boundaries before forgiving them and tell them to make sure that they don't do whatever they have done in the past.