I feel like a disgusting human being.
Are you serious? What have you done that you think is so bad?
Do you think I can avoid thinking like that after all the things I've done?
Thinking strong negative thoughts about yourself is a sign of low self-esteem and depression. It isn't appropriate to think such thoughts as they have such a bad effect on your mental health. You should talk with a therapist to help you process your emotions and learn to better accept yourself and your past experiences.
It's fine. I'm just taking my anger out here.
Well don't let your anger get the best of you. You deserve to have forgiveness for the things you do if you are sincere.