I sometimes have this impulse to let go of the steering wheel and crash
What do you think would happen if you did that? It sounds quite dangerous.
I think it would be fun, the thought of dying is exciting sometimes
I know you're upset, but it's really unsafe to let go of the steering wheel while driving. If this is because of depression you should seek some professional help.
It's not always a bad thing. I have so much anger inside me.
You are more deserving in this life, and once you resolve this depression, you will see the world in a new light. I know a therapist that you would love to speak with about your issues. I think this person is really cool and laid back, which I think will help you immensely.