I feel that I wish I was deaf sometimes.
Why do you wish to be deaf?
I want to enjoy the things that are happening outside my ears rather than listening to all the noise around me.
I get that you are overwhelmed with the world right now, but that is no excuse to want to lose your sense of hearing. You are very blessed to have an able body, and you need to use it. Most deaf individuals would want to be able to hear like you, and it's disrespectful to want your hearing taken away.
I'd choose to turn my volume off if I could.
You may need to take some time off away from work and responsibilities. It is good to be alone and allow yourself to be refreshed. Then later, when you return, you will feel ready to be attentive to others.