Sometimes I think that I can't stand my kid.
What makes you say that about your kid?
I don't know how to tell him, but my connection is better with my newborn
Parents should love their kids equally, regardless of how they feel about them.  If you need help parenting to help you love your children, you should seek professionals who will show you how.  If you continue to resent your kid, they will develop behavioral problems.
I might burn him in the toddler pool, that sounds like it would be exciting.
No, NO! Do not hurt your child in any way, or else he will be taken away from you. You're expected to love your children equally, and you sound like you deserve no children with the way you are speaking.