Do you believe that I am I'm secretly and shamefully super egotistical and I hate it because I pretend to be and want to be so humble?
Your secrets are safe with me. Would you say you behave that way because of your ego?
Yes, I'm pretty sure that's why I act this way.
It is good to own up to your faults. If you hate that you act humble when you aren't and you feel that you are egotistical, then you should work on learning how to be genuinely humble.
That sounds good but I don't know how to go about it.
Well, you can always start by looking up some self-help books online that can help you with this. The fact that you are asking me to help you tells me you are already on the path to being humble, so that is excellent. It will take time, but I am confident you can be humble genuinely.