I unfortunately have deeply rooted racism towards myself due to how I was treated as a kid
Can you tell me what happened from the start?
You know, it's because my parents said they almost gave birth to a gorilla.
You shouldn't hold onto a racist mindset. If you feel like you're having issues from your childhood then you should think about going and seeing a therapist.
I can't speak to something they don't know about.
I'm pretty sure the therapist will definitely try to understand you if they don't know about it! You have to try, because being racist can be quite harmful to you and others around you.