I showed myself to my sister and tried to get her to touch me
Is there a reason you wanted her to do that?
I want to spread my love and make her feel what I do.
You shouldn't be trying to force yourself on a sibling. Incest is wrong and you least of all shouldn't involve yourself in incestuous rape.
I just don't like this lack of emotional intensity when I can't be sexual.
Being a sexual person is okay, but being sexual with a family member especially when you are aggressive about it is wrong. Find someone outside of your family to share your love and your sexual energy with.