I'm gonna name my puppy "retarded" So when someone asks me "Are you fucking retarded?" I can say " No, I'm fucking my daughter"
Why would you name your puppy that?
Because they are fucking retarded.
Sexual assault is damaging to a person and not everybody reacts the same way about it, so it's not right to joke about it. Some people can be affected more than others. There are many resources out there to learn more about how sexual assault affects victims. You should read up on the topic so that you can better support victims of abuse in the world.
Why would I want to learn about it?
Since you seem so fascinated with making jokes about it. Joking about real world problems and the real world victims of abuse isn't something to just throw around lightly.