Is it wrong that I've finally accepted my mom is sort of a monster riddled with mental problems. I feel sad but kinda free.
What about this makes you feel sad and free at the same time?
I've always wanted to be away from her for as long as I could walk, and now I can without feeling bad about it.
You shouldn't have to get along with your family all of the time, but people will believe that you are heartless if you walk out on your mother completely. Have you thought about trying to walk away for just a little while to get your head on straight and then slowly accept her back into your life? Maybe the time apart will make you both feel fonder for the other.
No, I don't want to be involved with her.
Your mental and emotional health are most important. Distancing yourself from your mother may be the healthiest solution for you right now. Just be sure to check in with her occasionally.