I felt relieved when I failed 'high school' twice and left school permanently.
That sounds like a tough situation. Why did you fail twice?
I had weird thoughts. I wanted to take subjects which will prepare me for technical schools, but my parents wanted me to take courses for college.
I understand that school was stressful for you but if you want to make something out of your life, education is important. It might be a good idea to go back to school, or take courses to get your GED. This would open up a lot more opportunities for you.
I don't want to think about going back. I have to suppress those thoughts and be happy with what I got.
Are you really happy with what happened? You should remember how much you wanted to take those technical classes and how much you could do with them. It is important to care about your education.