I am planning on enacting the lemon law on my date.
What does the lemon law have to do with this date?
She is like a defective car and I should return  her.
It is not nice to compare a person to a car. A person has feelings and thoughts while a car is an object that you pay money for. If the date doesn't work out, it doesn't mean that you can return her.
But she is defective, she wouldn't have sex with me.
Lemon laws have to do with a company manufacturing a car that is not up to standards. Your date not having sex with you does not fall under the category of what you can enact the lemon law for.