I love my family but I do not like them
How can you love your family but not like them?
I love them because we're family, but they can be stupid and annoying sometimes, including contradicting themselves a lot.
It's good to love and support your family. But it's understandable that we don't always like everything they do. It's seems like a pretty normal reaction.
I just can't understand the way they are, sometimes I  think that if they were dead I wouldn't care. Is this hate or just frustration?
You seem to be conflicted on what you love and hate as far as family matters, I can relate to that too. Your family is not likeable that is for sure. But to not care if they were dead is not love, so seek some therapy to find out how to deal with them properly.