Thinking I may have an eating disorder.
Why do you think you're developing that?
I think it has something to do with my excessive calorie counting and my delusional belief in the "ideal" body.
I have learned that you do not have to worry about things or deal with your problems alone. Talk to family members, a professional, or anyone that you think may help you in this situation. Having an eating disorder is not only scary, but it can also be life-threatening.
My friends and family can't teach me how to be skinny.
It makes sense that your family wouldn't be able to help, but that just means it is probably a serious problem. Why not try speaking with a professional? Their job is to help people with things like that.