I cheated but it didn't stop there
Why didn't you stop after you cheated the first time?
I wanted her to feel like shit and be depressive and suicidal
You have done an evil thing by cheating on your partner. You should be ashamed of doing so. Imagine how much she'll get hurt if she got to know about you infidelity.
Nothing much. I guess I'm the bad guy.
You took it to the next level by continuing. You should end the relationship because it is wrong to cheat on your partner.