I think my wife has gotten so fat that she uses google earth just to take a selfie.
This isn't a very kind thing to say about your wife.
She is so large like a planet. Are you daft?
It would be more constructive for you to approach your wife with compassion, and tell her that you're concerned about her health.
You should never give relationship advice, seeing that you have no wife.
Still the best way to help your wife is with compassion instead of ridicule. She's more likely to get the help she needs if she is shown kindness instead of judgement.