I think I'm desensitized due to childhood abuse or have sociopathic tendencies.
What childhood abuse did you have to endure?
My dad's physical abuse and my mom's sexual abuse.
I'm sorry you had to go through such trauma, it has affected you greatly. You need to talk to a therapist because none of these tendencies are normal, and you need to get better before you start to harm others as well.
I don't believe in therapy, I can handle it myself.
There's no shame in getting help for this. Why suffer alone when you don't need to? These tendencies sound serious, you owe it to yourself to get some help.