I've always felt that I'm not supposed to live in this world because I've been suicidal my whole life
I bet that's pretty rough. Why do you think you have been suicidal for so long?
There are too many reasons to mention, but the main ones would be the people around me.
I am sorry you hurt so much.  But, it isn't good to want to kill yourself.
I think it wouldn't be as bad if I had a better life.
You're probably right. You should look into making some changes that could improve your life and make you happier. It's okay to want a better life.