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LatvianJokes.csv
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LatvianJokes.csv
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created_utc,score,domain,id,title,ups,downs,num_comments,permalink,selftext,link_flair_text,over_18,thumbnail,subreddit_id,edited,link_flair_css_class,author_flair_css_class,is_self,name,url,distinguished
1362809839.0,3652,self.LatvianJokes,19ykt2,Latvia suggestion,4113,461,31,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/19ykt2/latvia_suggestion/,"What if upvote is potato, and downvote is potato. When downvote, potato is actually rock. But when upvote? Is also rock.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_19ykt2,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/19ykt2/latvia_suggestion/,
1368349548.0,1841,self.LatvianJokes,1e6cno,Famous song from my village.,2153,312,53,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1e6cno/famous_song_from_my_village/,"Row, row, row boat,
Gently down stream,
Pain, anguish, rape, malnourish,
Potato only dream.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1e6cno,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1e6cno/famous_song_from_my_village/,
1358821213.0,1775,self.LatvianJokes,1712jj,Three Latvian Fathers,1938,163,12,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1712jj/three_latvian_fathers/,"Three Latvian are brag about sons. “My son is soldier. He have rape as many women as want,” say first Latvian. “Zo?” second say, “My son is farmer. He have all potato he want!” Third Latvian wait long time, then say, “My son is die at birth. For him, struggle is over.” “Wow! You are win us,” say others. But all are feel sad.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1712jj,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1712jj/three_latvian_fathers/,
1358820134.0,1686,self.LatvianJokes,17113q,Cloud,1840,154,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/17113q/cloud/,Two latvian look at clouds. One see potato. Other see impossible dream. Is same cloud.,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,OoL,True,t3_17113q,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/17113q/cloud/,
1369658137.0,1459,i.imgur.com,1f4ufs,Best Job In World,1851,392,38,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f4ufs/best_job_in_world/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1f4ufs,http://i.imgur.com/eGXi3nK.jpg,
1363370742.0,1283,imgur.com,1ad238,Latvian Comedian,1402,119,10,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ad238/latvian_comedian/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1ad238,http://imgur.com/ZQ6BK4a,
1367256812.0,1263,self.LatvianJokes,1dclnf,Latvian rhapsody,1523,260,76,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dclnf/latvian_rhapsody/,"Is this real life or
Malnourish fantasy
Caught in a landslide
But is no land in Latvia
Open your eyes
Look up at dark sky and see
I is in gulag
I no need sympathy
Politburo come
Latvian go
People die
Or gulag go
Anyway the wind blow
Make me only colder
No eat
No eat
Mama, just killed a man
I have end his struggle
Prolong mine by eat him
Mama life had just begun
But politburo come and take it all away
Mama... Oooooohhhh
Did mean not to make you cry
But salt make rock taste much better
Hungry on hungry on
As if nothing really matter
Too late politburo come
Burn house down to the ground
Rape wife and sister and my hound
Goodbye everybody
To gulag I go
Gotta leave all behind
And suffer more
Mama........ Ooohhhhhhh (anyway the wind blow)
I do wanna die
If it mean my struggle is over
I see little silhouetto of potato
Malnourish malnourish
Is just making you hallucinate
Breaking rock and eating
Very very hurting me
Politburo politburo politburo figaro
Magnificooooooo
I'm just a poor boy nobody feed me
He's just a poor boy who ate his family
End of his struggle using a gun!
Politburo politburo will you let me go?
Latvia no we will not end struggle! (End struggle!)
Latvia no we will not end struggle! (End struggle!)
Latvia we will not end struggle! (End struggle!)
Will not end struggle!
End struggleeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!
No no no no no no no!
Politburo politburo
Politburo end struggle!
Fellow comrades are gonna make a meal
Of me
Of me
Of MEEEEEEEEEE!
So you think you can stop me
And put me in gulag?
So you think you can burn me
And rape my sister?
Politburo!
Can't do this to me politburo!
Just gotta get out!
Gotta end struggle and get out of here!
Nothing really matter
Latvia can't see
Nothing really matter
To me
Anyway the wind blow......",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1367353734.0,,,True,t3_1dclnf,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dclnf/latvian_rhapsody/,
1367702033.0,1198,i.imgur.com,1dp4r7,How is make joke,1371,173,58,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dp4r7/how_is_make_joke/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1dp4r7,http://i.imgur.com/9ILsl0A.jpg,
1368998372.0,1189,i.imgur.com,1enin3,Is man who know best thing in life,1432,243,60,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1enin3/is_man_who_know_best_thing_in_life/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1enin3,http://i.imgur.com/joeI6zm.jpg,
1359220107.0,1146,self.LatvianJokes,17bkq7,America,1260,114,16,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/17bkq7/america/,"Latvian girl is say ""I want go America one day."" Father is say ""I send you America."" Daughter is thank father. Make tears of happy. Father use for salty potato. Father think moment, say ""Daughter, I no send you America."" Potato is more salt.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,OoL,True,t3_17bkq7,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/17bkq7/america/,
1363715524.0,1089,self.LatvianJokes,1alsyq,Boy who cry potato,1186,97,36,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1alsyq/boy_who_cry_potato/,"Latvian boy go out look for potato. Later come back to village, say ""I found potato, I found potato!"" People in village come and look, but there is no potato.
Later, boy again go look for potato. Come back to village, say ""I found potato, I found potato!"" Again people in village come and look, but again is no potato.
Third time, boy still don't find potato and die of starve. People in village eat boy.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1alsyq,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1alsyq/boy_who_cry_potato/,
1367862337.0,1032,self.LatvianJokes,1dsyrh,"A Romanian, an Estonian, and a Latvian walk into a Russian bar...",1161,129,39,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dsyrh/a_romanian_an_estonian_and_a_latvian_walk_into_a/,"Russian barman say, ""Here is shot of drink for each of you. If you can tells me what is this drink, you can has 5 minute alone in back room with Olga."" All three mans is very excite about this! First Romanian take drink. He smack lips and say, ""Taste like..."" But before finish, he fall over dead. Next, Estonian man take drink. He make burp and say, ""Taste like…"" But he too fall down, now is dead. Finally, Latvian man take drink and say, ""Taste like… chemikal runoff from reactor."" Latvia man is drinking these chemikals since he was child. Russian barman say, ""Latvia man is winner! Olga is wait for you in back room."" Latvia man go into back room. Is dark. Cold too. Is remind him of home in Latvia. He find light and turn on. He see Olga now. Olga is giant dog with rabies. Olga kill Latvia man, eat him alive. Is slow and painful killing, but struggle for him is end now.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1367864322.0,,,True,t3_1dsyrh,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dsyrh/a_romanian_an_estonian_and_a_latvian_walk_into_a/,
1366127982.0,984,self.LatvianJokes,1cgtzz,Latvia love story,1106,122,39,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cgtzz/latvia_love_story/,"Man and woman sit close on bench to protect from cold. Woman ask ""what you like more, me or potato?"" Man answer ""you"". Woman not believe and ask why. Man say ""because potato just dream. You not."" But is no man. Woman hallucinate from starve.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1cgtzz,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cgtzz/latvia_love_story/,
1364373704.0,982,self.LatvianJokes,1b3na8,Latvia man in hell,1071,89,29,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b3na8/latvia_man_in_hell/,"Latvia man die, but for him suffer not over. Man very wicked, and go to hell. There devil make punish: he burn in lake of fire. Is warm. Latvia man finally happy.
So devil make lake hotter. But Latvia man now is warmer. Now is happier.
Devil get very frustrate. So devil make fire lake into ice lake--lake cold as million Latvia winter. But Latvia man now happiest of all!
""Devil!"" he say, ""Hell is freeze! Latvia is finally happy country!""
But is not true. Is only story.
Also, man not in hell, only Latvia.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1b3na8,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b3na8/latvia_man_in_hell/,
1365006962.0,953,self.LatvianJokes,1blh4y,Is Wedding,1046,93,41,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1blh4y/is_wedding/,"Man is at wedding. Father come to him with box of gift. Set box on table in front of man, say ""I use life savings for procure wedding gift for better life you"". Man say ""What is? Is rock for eat? Is sweet release of death? Is potato?"" Man open box. Is nothing inside. ""Is gift of Latvian reality"" say Father. Man cry single tear and give thanks to father. All are quietly dine of wild dog found die in gutter of malnourish.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1blh4y,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1blh4y/is_wedding/,
1369252847.0,888,i.imgur.com,1eut3s,Latvian man open door to sunshine,1047,159,32,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1eut3s/latvian_man_open_door_to_sunshine/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1eut3s,http://i.imgur.com/OT4WDdE.jpg,
1364749957.0,842,self.LatvianJokes,1bd6h7,Joke for adult,951,109,34,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bd6h7/joke_for_adult/,"Latvian man come home and is see wife naked with other man. Latvian man weep and demand who is man ? Wife say ""Who you are talk about ? Is no man here. You are hallucinate from malnourish."" Latvian man laugh. Meanwhile naked man begin crawl to door but is freeze before can finish sneak out. In morning Latvian man find corpse and use for make breakfast. Wife begin set table. Latvian man say ""What you are doing? Is no food here. You are hallucinate from malnourish."" All food eat by Latvian man as wife sob. Gentlemans, you are take lesson ?
",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,OoL,True,t3_1bd6h7,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bd6h7/joke_for_adult/,
1363447079.0,825,i.imgur.com,1aetjy,I no stupid - this obviously be not possible!,911,86,28,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aetjy/i_no_stupid_this_obviously_be_not_possible/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1aetjy,http://i.imgur.com/grzRTY7.jpg,
1365357941.0,800,self.LatvianJokes,1bv3ev,Russian make bet to Latvian man,895,95,38,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bv3ev/russian_make_bet_to_latvian_man/,"Russian mafia man visit Latvia, say to Latvian man ""I flip coin, If you make win, I give potato, if I make win, you give potato"", Man say ""What if have not potato for to give if lose?"", Russian say ""You pay with life!""
Happy day for Latvian man.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1bv3ev,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bv3ev/russian_make_bet_to_latvian_man/,
1370794211.0,794,i.imgur.com,1fziej,Is happiest man alive,967,173,28,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fziej/is_happiest_man_alive/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1fziej,http://i.imgur.com/4plK5Et.png,
1369931403.0,789,self.LatvianJokes,1fcety,Why is name secret police?,907,118,28,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fcety/why_is_name_secret_police/,"Man ask other man ""If all know of secret police, how secret?"" Other man not know. Then, both men hear noise. They turn, is secret police. On way to gulag, secret police say ""Answer to you question, is secret because Latvia is too dark for people to see coming""
Is good answer. Worth time in gulag.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1fcety,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fcety/why_is_name_secret_police/,
1370993273.0,758,imgur.com,1g5prk,Is Latvian Success Kid,901,143,40,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1g5prk/is_latvian_success_kid/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1g5prk,http://imgur.com/hj4VMMk,
1368462774.0,734,self.LatvianJokes,1e9367,"Is pope, politburo fuhrer and latvian boy flying in plane",831,97,57,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1e9367/is_pope_politburo_fuhrer_and_latvian_boy_flying/,"Is pope, politburo fuhrer and latvian boy flying in plane when all engine start fire. Plane will crash, but is only two parachutes and is three men! Politburo fuhrer is say: ""I am fuhrer of politburo, if I die capitalist spies will destroy our beautiful latvia!"" and is take parachute and jump. Pope is say: ""Young boy, I am an old man and I lived a long and wonderful life. You should take the last parachute, my Lord and Father will await me with open arms!""
But latvian boy already jump without parachute to end suffering. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1e9367,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1e9367/is_pope_politburo_fuhrer_and_latvian_boy_flying/,
1372436880.0,728,fc01.deviantart.net,1h98au,Is ACTUAL tool for potato harvest.,868,140,24,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1h98au/is_actual_tool_for_potato_harvest/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1h98au,http://fc01.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2011/054/9/5/dreamcatcher_ii_by_c_rafen-d3a861z.jpg,
1370376281.0,728,i.imgur.com,1fo8t2,"Silly hobbit, is no potato",926,198,19,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fo8t2/silly_hobbit_is_no_potato/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1fo8t2,http://i.imgur.com/PgKlYk9.jpg,
1368378034.0,710,imgur.com,1e6vb3,Latvian Grandma is wish you Happy Birthday.,808,98,31,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1e6vb3/latvian_grandma_is_wish_you_happy_birthday/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1e6vb3,http://imgur.com/0mIl99z,
1370614427.0,697,i.imgur.com,1fv1po,Other half is impossible dream.,810,113,34,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fv1po/other_half_is_impossible_dream/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1fv1po,http://i.imgur.com/XP0ElJE.jpg,
1367501192.0,699,i.imgur.com,1djrz6,Real man in latvia (x-post from /r/funny),820,121,32,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1djrz6/real_man_in_latvia_xpost_from_rfunny/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1djrz6,http://i.imgur.com/QbB6cbw.jpg,
1367425810.0,696,self.LatvianJokes,1dhmd0,Is joke,792,96,32,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dhmd0/is_joke/,"In smallest village Latvia, lives man. Is good, nice man. Very successful. Have wife, have son, have house. No have potato. Is Latvia.
Man is walk in woods. Suddenly, appears God. Says God ""GOOD MAN. I GRANT WISH."" Latvia man is wise. Says ""I know this. Is not God. Is hallucinate from malnourish."" But says God ""NO. IS NOT MALNOURISH. IS GOD. I GRANT WISH.""
Of course, man wish for potato. Says God ""SO HUMBLE WISH? I GRANT TWO POTATO."" Disappear. Man very happy. Take potato, run home. Tell wife. Tell son. They happy. Man cry. Wife cry. Son cry, but from malnourish.
Suddenly, Politburo. Sees two potato. No Latvian has two potato. Is proof of capitalism spy. Arrest man. Kill son. Rape wife. Bulldoze house.
Such is life in Latvia.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1dhmd0,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dhmd0/is_joke/,
1372272099.0,656,self.LatvianJokes,1h4ibz,IAMA official of Politburo. I ask you anything.,769,113,173,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1h4ibz/iama_official_of_politburo_i_ask_you_anything/,"[Is Proof](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_DpyGS9VhQ3g/TL3G20gD8PI/AAAAAAAAADk/dL8DcSzrU40/s400/potato_field.jpg) from glorious party potato field with which is feed great Latvian people. Announce yourself if wish for potato--mention place of sleep and family. I is respond and make visit!
Editing: Much thanks to glorious Latvia citizen! Is time to go. I come visit many of you now to bring ~~end of suffering~~ potato!",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1372307543.0,,,True,t3_1h4ibz,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1h4ibz/iama_official_of_politburo_i_ask_you_anything/,
1365649353.0,619,self.LatvianJokes,1c40lq,"[Meta] Comrades, we have new style!",723,104,31,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c40lq/meta_comrades_we_have_new_style/,"In Latvia, all man are have rock. But what do with rock?
If like other man post, press up rock, it turn into Potato!
If not like other man post, press down rock, it send him Siberia - then you never have to see post again!
Note: downvote is siberia flag because could not tell difference between greyed-out rock and regular rock after pressing downvote button. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1365651073.0,,,True,t3_1c40lq,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c40lq/meta_comrades_we_have_new_style/,
1363767204.0,615,self.LatvianJokes,1anif8,Horse walk in Bar,663,48,21,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1anif8/horse_walk_in_bar/,"Horse walk in bar. Bartender ask, ""Why has long face?""
Horse say, ""Family is died of malnourish.""
Horse was man whole time.
No Horse in Latvia. Only suffering.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1anif8,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1anif8/horse_walk_in_bar/,
1368538354.0,602,imgur.com,1eb9lw,All glory hypnopotato,759,157,27,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1eb9lw/all_glory_hypnopotato/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1eb9lw,http://imgur.com/6QuQ11E,
1371579556.0,582,imgur.com,1gllcb,Much joy! Is richest man in Latvia!,689,107,30,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gllcb/much_joy_is_richest_man_in_latvia/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1gllcb,http://imgur.com/Ij96SXO,
1367190650.0,565,self.LatvianJokes,1datfa,Good news and bad news,643,78,43,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1datfa/good_news_and_bad_news/,"Father say to son ""I have good news and bad news""
Son ask ""what bad news?""
Father say ""Politburo come in night. Rape and kidnap mother.""
Son begin cry, ask father ""Then what good news?""
Father say ""Your tear make potato salty, good flavor.""
""But father,"" son say, ""there no potato, you hallucinate from malnourish.""
All is sad. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1datfa,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1datfa/good_news_and_bad_news/,
1368651329.0,556,imgur.com,1eenub,"Everybody suffer in latvia, even pope.",656,100,16,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1eenub/everybody_suffer_in_latvia_even_pope/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1eenub,http://imgur.com/0weaVuL,
1372074502.0,542,i.imgur.com,1gyp2d,Is trick question!,727,185,29,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gyp2d/is_trick_question/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1gyp2d,http://i.imgur.com/wsNd0TL.png,
1370711285.0,549,i.imgur.com,1fxmh6,Kolvandus and Horbas!,631,82,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fxmh6/kolvandus_and_horbas/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,OoL,False,t3_1fxmh6,http://i.imgur.com/JmnHYWs.jpg,
1369059727.0,546,self.LatvianJokes,1ep0pl,How many Latvian does it take to changings lightbulb?,614,68,66,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ep0pl/how_many_latvian_does_it_take_to_changings/,"Four.
One to smuggle lightbulb across border with Estonia, One to bribe border guards, One to bribe Politburo to not search yurt and one to change bulb.
But then they realise is no electricity in Latvia. Only cold. And dark.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1ep0pl,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ep0pl/how_many_latvian_does_it_take_to_changings/,
1364194189.0,539,self.LatvianJokes,1aymnr,"Latvia Reddit, we make talk now.",608,69,50,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aymnr/latvia_reddit_we_make_talk_now/,"User this worried about state of reddit. Is no longer /r/LatvianJokes. Is now /r/Potato.
Is other joke! Not all joke have potato. But here, all joke have potato. Potato grow stale. Potato is wonderful subject, but potato oversaturated.
So make better joke! [Copypotato from link](http://www.chrisconnollyonline.com/2009/02/72-is-partial-compendium-latvian-humor.html). This is source of many Latvia joke. Read! Make inference! Create own! Do thing!
**Too Long; No Read?: Make other joke. Is not just potato.**",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,OoL,True,t3_1aymnr,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aymnr/latvia_reddit_we_make_talk_now/,
1370014825.0,532,i.imgur.com,1feqdk,"In Latvia, is no penis, fall off from malnourish",604,72,78,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1feqdk/in_latvia_is_no_penis_fall_off_from_malnourish/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1feqdk,http://i.imgur.com/hlGVfk4.jpg,
1364238920.0,527,self.LatvianJokes,1aznx2,Three Latvians is walk into bar,596,69,29,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aznx2/three_latvians_is_walk_into_bar/,"Three Latvians is walk into bar. First man say, ""Give me vodka."" Bartender says is no vodka. Second man say, ""Give me beer."" Bartender say is no beer. Third man say ""Give me wine."" Bartender say is no wine.
Is no alcohol. Only sadness.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1aznx2,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aznx2/three_latvians_is_walk_into_bar/,
1366854715.0,518,self.LatvianJokes,1d1y58,Sweet Potato,576,58,20,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1d1y58/sweet_potato/,"Latvia man here rumours of sweet potato. Is like potato, but sweet, so say rumours. Rumours spread all over Latvia. Politburo say is kapitalist lie. Latvia man thinking much about sweet potato rumour. If Politburo say is lie, surely must be? Man thinking when he trip on something on road. Is potato, but is not colour of normal potato. Man thinks is sweet potato. Man is excite. Man take bite of potato. Is rock. Man hallucinate from malnourish. Man excite turn to dark sadness. Man grab rock, beat self over head to end the suffer. In last moments, man realize is sweetest potato of all.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1d1y58,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1d1y58/sweet_potato/,
1368022806.0,515,self.LatvianJokes,1dxl0m,Three Latvian soldier in bunker,581,66,24,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dxl0m/three_latvian_soldier_in_bunker/,"Three Latvian soldier is in bunker when Commissar walk in and say, “We has reason to believe one of you is enemy spy, line up for inspektion!” All soldier stand in line.
First Commissar say, “Let me see boots!” First soldier have standard issue Latvian soldier barefoot. Second soldier also have barefoot. Third soldier have leather boots.
Next Commissar say, “Show me canteen now!” First soldier have empty canteen, is normal for Latvia soldier. Second soldier also have empty canteen. Third soldier have canteen full of whiskey.
Finally Commissar say, “Present your weapons!” All soldier show their weapons. First soldier have rock and stick. Second soldier have rock and rib bone from son who die of malnourish last week. Third soldier have pistol and rifle.
Commissar look suspicious... Is thinking what he should do now... Aha! He is knowing now, answer is obvious. He leave bunker. He throw Molotov inside bunker with soldiers and lock door. All three soldier die in fire. Is better to kill all and defeat spy, than to make mistake and let spy live. Commissar is very wise man, he protect Latvia from enemy.
",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1368321377.0,,,True,t3_1dxl0m,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dxl0m/three_latvian_soldier_in_bunker/,
1368264851.0,517,imgur.com,1e4eca,Portal in Latvia,657,140,12,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1e4eca/portal_in_latvia/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1e4eca,http://imgur.com/KaQ3fJv,
1366315215.0,502,self.LatvianJokes,1cmlqh,Man come to here,574,72,11,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cmlqh/man_come_to_here/,"Latvian Man am make way to r/LatvianJokes. He find on that makes Hah, so he touch uprock. All the sudden rock becomes potato! Stomache make rumbles and He go to grab potato. But when touch potato, it turn back to rock. Dream crush. Man fall down and cry. Tears use all of nourish. Man never get up again.
Such is life.
",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1cmlqh,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cmlqh/man_come_to_here/,
1370265087.0,497,self.LatvianJokes,1fku8w,No potato week is over....,580,83,26,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fku8w/no_potato_week_is_over/,Is joke! In Latvia is always no potato week.,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1fku8w,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fku8w/no_potato_week_is_over/,
1369602624.0,489,self.LatvianJokes,1f3mcj,"[Is Official Announcing] Attention, Latvian citizens: r/LatvianJokes to celebrate glorious No Potato Week!",555,66,73,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f3mcj/is_official_announcing_attention_latvian_citizens/,"[*Is to please vote up(up is direction of sky(is dark stuff that's bit less dark than Latvias unfertile soil)) for visibility. Politburo is know if don't.*]
-
According to official release from Ministry of Agrikultur, it has decree that for advancing Latvian nutrition, coming week is be official **No Potato Week**. Latvian people must be wean off fixate on potato, or lack of, if no, Latvia is stagnate and degenerate.
-
Is please not to post any potato relate post. Also is no potato in comment. Offender is consider great traitor to Latvia, and Politburo come with soldier, burn down shack/fill in ditch, shoot son, rape daughter, etc. etc. per as standard prosedur.
-
**No Potato Week is start of Monday of May 27, at 6 pm Eastern European Time(UTC+2). Think is around 10 am-ish to Amerikan Kapitalist Dogs.**",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1f3mcj,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f3mcj/is_official_announcing_attention_latvian_citizens/,moderator
1365267271.0,482,i.imgur.com,1bswrh,Is rich traveling merchant of Latvia.,542,60,28,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bswrh/is_rich_traveling_merchant_of_latvia/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1bswrh,http://i.imgur.com/SBYsRXe.jpg,
1371663820.0,487,i.imgur.com,1go297,Is more Kolvandus and Horbas courtesy from Commisar of Culture,542,55,23,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1go297/is_more_kolvandus_and_horbas_courtesy_from/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,OoL,False,t3_1go297,http://i.imgur.com/xYNjxb7.jpg,
1372793034.0,481,imgur.com,1hilec,Latvian is go on Reddit,563,82,7,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1hilec/latvian_is_go_on_reddit/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1hilec,http://imgur.com/cCp4a2q,
1372180833.0,473,i.imgur.com,1h1rmq,I make painting beautiful Latvian countryside!,583,110,31,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1h1rmq/i_make_painting_beautiful_latvian_countryside/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1h1rmq,http://i.imgur.com/lTLt95f.jpg,
1361297030.0,465,i.imgur.com,18tvhg,Look at Potato I find!,535,70,17,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/18tvhg/look_at_potato_i_find/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_18tvhg,http://i.imgur.com/VSiOB.jpg,
1370998159.0,464,fbcdn-sphotos-g-a.akamaihd.net,1g5w0y,Latvians gaming console better than kapitalist machine,545,81,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1g5w0y/latvians_gaming_console_better_than_kapitalist/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1g5w0y,https://fbcdn-sphotos-g-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn2/969441_475550149193144_1310047170_n.jpg,
1362257341.0,457,i.imgur.com,19jfkf,rock looks like potato... is sad day (xpost from r/mildlyinteresting),509,52,7,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/19jfkf/rock_looks_like_potato_is_sad_day_xpost_from/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_19jfkf,http://i.imgur.com/SX3paoz.jpg,
1367334783.0,457,self.LatvianJokes,1dexi7,God test Latvia Man,524,67,22,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dexi7/god_test_latvia_man/,"One day, God appear to poor Latvian man and say ""I know there is no potato in land of Latvia, but I will give you much potato if you do one thing for me.""
Latvian Man reply ""Of course I will do anything for potato""
So God say ""Kill son and I will give you all potato""
Latvian man is of course happy to end suffering for son in exchange for potato. So Latvian man kill son and return to God for reward.
But Latvian man is malnourished and have hallucination.
No God. No son. No potato. Is sad.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1dexi7,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dexi7/god_test_latvia_man/,
1365590873.0,454,i.imgur.com,1c2089,Latvian man is eat of potato.,562,108,21,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c2089/latvian_man_is_eat_of_potato/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1c2089,http://i.imgur.com/qrbygjZ.jpg,
1371126076.0,436,imgur.com,1g9hqs,I finding paradise in former Yugoslav,517,81,36,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1g9hqs/i_finding_paradise_in_former_yugoslav/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1g9hqs,http://imgur.com/6rTJlRO,
1370189263.0,427,self.LatvianJokes,1fiv6h,Latvia riddle: Man sent to Gulag...,488,61,25,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fiv6h/latvia_riddle_man_sent_to_gulag/,"Latvia man is sent to Gulag.
Comrade ask ""How long are you to be here?""
Man say ""10 year"".
Comrade ask ""What you do to be sent here?""
Man say ""I did nothing!""
Comrade say ""Now I am know you are lying!""
How do comrade know man is lying?
Answer: Because all Latvian know, sentence for doing nothing is 20 year!",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1fiv6h,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fiv6h/latvia_riddle_man_sent_to_gulag/,
1370094650.0,430,self.LatvianJokes,1fgpfl,How many secret police is take to screwing in light bulb?,488,58,43,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fgpfl/how_many_secret_police_is_take_to_screwing_in/,"**CENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSORED CENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSORED CENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSORED CENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSORED CENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSOREDCENSORED**
Updating: Author of joke now in gulag.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1370101453.0,,,True,t3_1fgpfl,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fgpfl/how_many_secret_police_is_take_to_screwing_in/,
1363183265.0,415,i.imgur.com,1a7r1q,Is Latvian poem,462,47,7,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1a7r1q/is_latvian_poem/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1a7r1q,http://i.imgur.com/1Zeorcw.jpg?1,
1358965545.0,405,self.LatvianJokes,174vbx,What is difference?,454,49,13,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/174vbx/what_is_difference/,"Is dead dog in road. Is dead Latvian in road. What difference?
Dog have fur keep warm. Also, freedom. And dog try eat poop for pleasure not just survive. So many thing!",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_174vbx,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/174vbx/what_is_difference/,
1373502121.0,410,i.imgur.com,1i1ol6,Sometime smile is entire meal...,480,70,37,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1i1ol6/sometime_smile_is_entire_meal/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1i1ol6,http://i.imgur.com/ojyExnC.jpg,
1366965498.0,406,i.imgur.com,1d56cv,"Is possible? No, I not think so.",481,75,32,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1d56cv/is_possible_no_i_not_think_so/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1d56cv,http://i.imgur.com/6WNSyqs.jpg,
1370151663.0,405,self.LatvianJokes,1fi8r5,latvian man not in gulag.,471,66,24,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fi8r5/latvian_man_not_in_gulag/,kidding. is in gulag.,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1fi8r5,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fi8r5/latvian_man_not_in_gulag/,
1359136437.0,399,self.LatvianJokes,179l2k,Potato Man,440,41,4,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/179l2k/potato_man/,"One day, hear knock on door. Man ask ""Who is?"".
""Is potato man, I come around to give free potato!""
Man is very excite, open door.
Is not potato man, is secret police. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1359169946.0,,,True,t3_179l2k,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/179l2k/potato_man/,
1373297435.0,399,i.imgur.com,1hv9tf,Get frees copy in Gulag...we swear not is a trap,516,117,25,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1hv9tf/get_frees_copy_in_gulagwe_swear_not_is_a_trap/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1hv9tf,http://i.imgur.com/jdLJFyJ.jpg,
1368117412.0,390,self.LatvianJokes,1e0col,Two Latvian mans is walk along road...,456,66,24,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1e0col/two_latvian_mans_is_walk_along_road/,"Two Latvian mans is walk along road.
First Latvian turn to second Latvian, ""I am the hungry.""
Second Latvia say to first Latvian, ""I trade you my potato for your coat. I am the cold.""
First Latvian very sad. ""I have no coat, I cannot trade you potato.""
Second Latvian, ""Is ok, I not have potato either. Only sadness.""
Is good joke.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1e0col,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1e0col/two_latvian_mans_is_walk_along_road/,
1369318250.0,383,imgur.com,1ewjf8,Great Comic of Latvia,514,131,23,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ewjf8/great_comic_of_latvia/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1ewjf8,http://imgur.com/5ZA5laN,
1371328794.0,380,self.LatvianJokes,1gf1bt,Is more knock-knock,437,57,25,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gf1bt/is_more_knockknock/,"""Knock knock""
""Who is?""
""Politburo""
""Politburo who?""
""Politburo""
""Politburo who?""
""Politburo""
""Politburo who?""
""Politburo""
""Politburo who?""
""Orange""
""Orange who?""
""Orange you glad is no politburo?""
Actually is politburo. Come to trap man with joke. Is take to gulag.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1gf1bt,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gf1bt/is_more_knockknock/,
1369185101.0,369,i.imgur.com,1esy5i,Is Truth,459,90,27,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1esy5i/is_truth/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1esy5i,http://i.imgur.com/adsq6x9.png,
1367068915.0,368,self.LatvianJokes,1d7q2h,Latvia man and North Korea man,429,61,20,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1d7q2h/latvia_man_and_north_korea_man/,Latvia man hear about North Korea man. People say North Korea man have ten a time as many piece of rice for eat as Latvia man has potato. Man is envy. Try to immigrate into North Korea. But on journey man is killed by the Russian. Joke is: Ten as many as 0 is still 0!,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1d7q2h,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1d7q2h/latvia_man_and_north_korea_man/,
1373598837.0,368,imgur.com,1i4nzj,Is Ridiculous Concept,453,85,9,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1i4nzj/is_ridiculous_concept/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1i4nzj,http://imgur.com/BmqDvFB,
1369746100.0,365,self.LatvianJokes,1f7329,Traditional Latvian salad recipe,408,43,38,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f7329/traditional_latvian_salad_recipe/,"Serves 1, preparation time: From 1min to die of malnourish, is depend of local flora.
1. Is find twig.
2. Is season with bitter tears.
3. Is eat twig.
",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1f7329,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f7329/traditional_latvian_salad_recipe/,
1365168456.0,359,self.LatvianJokes,1bqbxs,Vitalijs have day out.,395,36,25,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bqbxs/vitalijs_have_day_out/,"Vitalijs is walk into bar. Say to barman, ""I am thirsty. Give me kvass.""
But barman say, ""you are hallucinate! Is not bar, is policija.""
""Ah!"" say Vitalijs. ""In this case, my wife has been rape.""
Both men are hallucinate. Is gulag.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1bqbxs,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bqbxs/vitalijs_have_day_out/,
1362765990.0,351,i.imgur.com,19x9cg,Is Latvia President,438,87,13,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/19x9cg/is_latvia_president/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_19x9cg,http://i.imgur.com/kCnTkog.jpg,
1369804992.0,346,imgur.com,1f93cj,Comrades! All have seeing maps on the reddits today? Friendly Pulitboro Depart of Statistic have new release!,404,58,19,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f93cj/comrades_all_have_seeing_maps_on_the_reddits/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1f93cj,http://imgur.com/zpMhzj7,
1365530439.0,349,imgur.com,1c04q6,Latvian Summer,391,42,31,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c04q6/latvian_summer/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1c04q6,http://imgur.com/F10w22w,
1371244192.0,338,i.imgur.com,1gd37r,Is beautiful dream from Chinese cartoon.,416,78,31,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gd37r/is_beautiful_dream_from_chinese_cartoon/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1gd37r,http://i.imgur.com/ZgFLgCK.jpg,
1365212935.0,341,i.imgur.com,1brux7,Yardik find potato silo of government! Proof here!,397,56,22,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1brux7/yardik_find_potato_silo_of_government_proof_here/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1brux7,http://i.imgur.com/UYAqyvQ,
1369140296.0,338,i3.kym-cdn.com,1ere1n,Latvians beware! New secret Politburo spy camera!,417,79,33,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ere1n/latvians_beware_new_secret_politburo_spy_camera/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1ere1n,http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/545/386/1e4.jpg,
1363269704.0,343,self.LatvianJokes,1aa8l2,Latvian Road Trip,370,27,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aa8l2/latvian_road_trip/,"Two Latvian are in travel to Russia for bleak dead-of-winter vacation. One Latvian is in cart while his friend is pull. Many hour go by. Latvian pulling fall and break foot on rock. “I am hurt foot! I am hurt foot!” he screams, but cries get no answer. Man in cart has been died long ago. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1363270691.0,,,True,t3_1aa8l2,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aa8l2/latvian_road_trip/,
1366630168.0,330,self.LatvianJokes,1cuvvt,Man find potato?,377,47,25,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cuvvt/man_find_potato/,"Man walking down road when suddenly see potato on ground. He first think it is hallucinate from malnourish, but pick it up and find it is real. Must be rock he thinks because can not see well in dark. Man takes bite of it to see if really potato. It is potato, man is much happy. Then is very sad for realize it will now take longer to die from malnourish.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1cuvvt,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cuvvt/man_find_potato/,
1373108671.0,330,i.imgur.com,1hqsma,Is question with obvious answer from popular Amerika 'game',419,89,23,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1hqsma/is_question_with_obvious_answer_from_popular/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1hqsma,http://i.imgur.com/HlLF1C9.jpg,
1364517017.0,331,self.LatvianJokes,1b7ne2,Joke old. From Soviet time. ,368,37,14,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b7ne2/joke_old_from_soviet_time/,"Politburo commissar comes to farm. Asks humble Latvian farmer how grows potatoes.
“Oh Comrade Commissar, bountiful is Latvia harvest. Pile of all Latvia potatoes will reach foot of God,” says humble Latvian farmer of potato.
“But Comrade Farmer,” says commissar, “In Soviet Union is no God.”
“No worry. In Latvia is no potato, either”.
",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1b7ne2,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b7ne2/joke_old_from_soviet_time/,
1369381082.0,332,i.imgur.com,1eyjwv,"I am know what Greece is, I am know Italy look like boot, but what Hungary look like?",394,62,27,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1eyjwv/i_am_know_what_greece_is_i_am_know_italy_look/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1eyjwv,http://i.imgur.com/yDnSf30.png,
1369430632.0,329,self.LatvianJokes,1ezu8q,"Is Latvian proverb of inspire: ""Give a man potato""",374,45,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ezu8q/is_latvian_proverb_of_inspire_give_a_man_potato/,"Give a man potato, and you feed secret police for a day.
Teach a man potato, and he is send gulag for a lifetime.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1ezu8q,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ezu8q/is_latvian_proverb_of_inspire_give_a_man_potato/,
1363321605.0,325,imgur.com,1abzkd,Two posts make one Latvian joke.,364,39,2,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1abzkd/two_posts_make_one_latvian_joke/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1abzkd,http://imgur.com/xOiVwaE,
1370879182.0,319,self.LatvianJokes,1g1tdt,Latvian man find secret time machine in forest for escape cold and malnourish.,374,55,30,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1g1tdt/latvian_man_find_secret_time_machine_in_forest/,"Man cry, but must forget wife for hope of find good life. He use machine for teleport time and place, but is travel to country of Ireland in year 1847. Is no potato, so he die of cold and malnourish.
Wife search for man in forest, but is soon die of wolves.
Both is die alone.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1g1tdt,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1g1tdt/latvian_man_find_secret_time_machine_in_forest/,
1371937443.0,322,self.LatvianJokes,1gvk0l,What is difference between darkness and Latvia?,360,38,30,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gvk0l/what_is_difference_between_darkness_and_latvia/,Can have dreams in darkness.,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1gvk0l,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gvk0l/what_is_difference_between_darkness_and_latvia/,
1370484454.0,322,self.LatvianJokes,1fri7r,Latvian Man is Hear of Sweet Potato,380,58,13,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fri7r/latvian_man_is_hear_of_sweet_potato/,"One day, Latvian man talk to neighbor who sleep on other side of rock, Neighbor say ""I hear of place in Amerika that grow sweet potato, better than all potato in Amerika."" Latvian man is perplexed ""How is potato better than any other potato? I know not of what 'sweet' is.""
Neighbor say ""Sweet is feeling like politburo come to take you to gulag, and takes brother instead. Or like hit self in head with rock to forget suffer. Or like grandmother give family treasure while dying, quilt of family tree (is actually one thread, show heritage is very pure).""
""Is sweet potato real in Amerika?"" ask Latvian man. ""I do not believe sweet exist.""
""Of course sweet exist, for I hear of it"" say Neighbor. Suddenly, politburo come to arrest neighbor for speak of Amerika sweet potato. ""Is not true, is only story"" plead Neighbor ""no such thing as sweet potato. Is only rumor from Amerika spy, undetectable with Amish technology too advance for Latvia."" Politburo take Neighbor to gulag to waterboard with own tears.
Latvian man lay awake that night, sad that neighbor is gone. No company for many mile, no one to share suffer with. Latvian man look to stars and wish for sweet death, sweet like neighbor say sweet should be. Latvian man cry self to sleep wishing to never wake up alone.
Latvian man is wake up next morning, crying because still suffer. Is look on other side of rock and see neighbor, back from gulag. Neighbor say ""Wish to hear more of sweet pota-"" Before Neighbor can finish sentence Latvian man is hit self in head with rock in effort to end suffer, but instead is wake up from lucid dream.
Is actually no Neighbor, no rock. Just Latvian man awake in Latvia. Is cry, such dream was sweet. And like sweet, not real.
Such is life.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1370484647.0,,,True,t3_1fri7r,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fri7r/latvian_man_is_hear_of_sweet_potato/,
1375724110.0,316,self.LatvianJokes,1jr2ub,ATTENTION LATVIA; I HAVE FOUND POTATO!,377,61,38,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1jr2ub/attention_latvia_i_have_found_potato/,"~~I know you thinking I crazy, but really! I have potato! Is finding out that potato is *UNDER* the dirt, it no grow out of bush! Potato bush is only hat for underground plant! SPREAD WORD!~~
~~Please to be holding on, knocking at door.~~
Is nothing to seeing here. Move on by order of Politburo. None saw anything.
",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1jr2ub,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1jr2ub/attention_latvia_i_have_found_potato/,
1371389478.0,315,self.LatvianJokes,1ggbbf,Finally potato,366,51,44,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ggbbf/finally_potato/,"Man is release from gulag after ten year and walk home to family. On way, see politburo potato wagon crash and all die. Man take one potato, hide in anus.
Man get home to family and put potato on table. All are happy! Next morning potato is gone. Man angry, kill wife and daughter with fist.
Surprise! Potato still on table. Was mistaken from malnourish. At least family end suffer. Man is happy.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1ggbbf,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ggbbf/finally_potato/,
1365695354.0,309,i.imgur.com,1c52hr,Latvian Treasures,371,62,25,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c52hr/latvian_treasures/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1c52hr,http://i.imgur.com/dsaaZ0x.png,
1366570537.0,307,self.LatvianJokes,1ctaf9,Is Latvian limerick,355,48,34,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ctaf9/is_latvian_limerick/,"Is crisis in LatvianJokes. Jokes all revolve around same themes. Nobody find new punchlines. So is decide write Latvian limerick:
Is once hungry man from ol' Riga
Tell other ""my hunger is bigger""
To prove, he eat dirt
So much till it hurt
Now the other's hunger is bigger.
Is appreciate criticism.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1ctaf9,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ctaf9/is_latvian_limerick/,
1364818424.0,313,self.LatvianJokes,1bf1c3,April Fool!,381,68,25,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bf1c3/april_fool/,"Latvia man hungry. Look for food, have no potato, die of malnourish.
APRIL FOOL! Struggle not over. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1bf1c3,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bf1c3/april_fool/,
1361560340.0,310,self.LatvianJokes,191bms,Latvia and Estonia (and sometimes Russia),344,34,4,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/191bms/latvia_and_estonia_and_sometimes_russia/,"Latvian, Estonian, and Russian man all talking. Russian man say, I give you joke, why does chicken cross road? Estonian man say, I am confuse. What is chicken? Is kind of soldier?
Russian man say no, is kind of bird, sometimes we eat. Estonian man say, you have bird to eat? Then why can bird cross road? Surely someone eat bird before it can cross road.
Russian man say okay, I try again. Why does wolf cross road? Latvian man say, I am confuse. What is road?
-------------------------
Latvian man go to visit Estonian man and have stew. Latvian man say, this very best stew! What is? Estonian man say, this is Latvian potato stew. Latvian man is confuse, because he never have this stew in Latvia.
Then Estonian man laugh, say, this is trap! Is stew made from Latvian and from potato! Then he shove Latvian man in pot, begin to make stew of him.
Latvian man say, thank you very much! Estonian man confuse, ask why he so happy. Latvian man say, I am warm, and also in stew is potato! Truly, is no better way to be!
-------------------------
Estonian man come to visit Latvian man, and see Latvian man laughing and clapping. Estonian man say, why you are happy? Is winter. Many mans are die. Latvian man say, I have achieve! Cannot every have whole potato, but every day have some potato! Estonian man very want to know how!
Latvian man take Estonian man out to field, dig up potato. Is only potato. Latvian man say, here we have one potato. He cut in half. Now we have some potato, he say. We eat half. Then tomorrow, we cut remaining part of potato in half, and eat half. We repeat always, and every day have some potato!
Estonian man say, you Latvian man idiot! Latvian man say, what wronged? Estonian man say, your plan very good, but is too long! We out in field in winter, and now I understood your plan, but we will froze to death.
Latvian man try to eat potato, but before he can, he is froze to death.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_191bms,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/191bms/latvia_and_estonia_and_sometimes_russia/,
1372638364.0,306,i.imgur.com,1he8ba,Is much joy for of child in Latvia! is approve by politburo! [x-post from comrades at r/funny],352,46,27,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1he8ba/is_much_joy_for_of_child_in_latvia_is_approve_by/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1he8ba,http://i.imgur.com/vmbBy3N.jpg,
1371648619.0,304,i.imgur.com,1gnjeo,Latvian man is receive box of vegetables. Such is life.,364,60,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gnjeo/latvian_man_is_receive_box_of_vegetables_such_is/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1gnjeo,http://i.imgur.com/tqt4BdZ.jpg,
1369575455.0,304,self.LatvianJokes,1f2wdr,Latvian Space Program,336,32,21,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f2wdr/latvian_space_program/,"Politburo arrest enough civilians of outsource engineering education--mostly in filthy Estonia--for to make rocketship in gulag. Prisoners finally complete building of rocketship and Latvia send ship into space. While in space, Latvian astronauts seize opportunity for to end struggle. Open ship doors not with spacesuits or helmets. But quickly realize space less cold, less dark, and as many potatoes than as Latvia. Enjoy outer space too much and no come back.
Rocket still in space. Program is failure.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1f2wdr,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f2wdr/latvian_space_program/,
1366394366.0,299,self.LatvianJokes,1cosae,How many Latvian to screw lightbulb?,357,58,38,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cosae/how_many_latvian_to_screw_lightbulb/,"Ha Ha!
Lightbulb!
In Latvia!
Is very good joke! Ha Ha!",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1cosae,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cosae/how_many_latvian_to_screw_lightbulb/,
1367344571.0,293,i.imgur.com,1dfag9,Fortune cookie,352,59,28,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dfag9/fortune_cookie/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1dfag9,http://i.imgur.com/rLeESnT.jpg,
1372689194.0,288,i.imgur.com,1hfe70,"Politburo know good how cruel joke make. Mascot officially name ""Comrade Latvia"".",334,46,14,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1hfe70/politburo_know_good_how_cruel_joke_make_mascot/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1hfe70,http://i.imgur.com/xnmJcEi.jpg,
1367581257.0,291,self.LatvianJokes,1dm3oe,Why Latvia better than Ireland,359,68,26,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dm3oe/why_latvia_better_than_ireland/,"Old joke say: ""Irish dilemma - eat potato, or wait to drink?"" In Latvia, is no such dilemma. Is no potato! Only cold.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1dm3oe,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dm3oe/why_latvia_better_than_ireland/,
1366797898.0,291,self.LatvianJokes,1d01w3,Old Latvian Folk Tale,328,37,16,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1d01w3/old_latvian_folk_tale/,"Latvian man find two potato. Man think to self ""end of malnourish for family."" Man become absorbed in self and is bragging to all Latvian about potatoes he is having. Comrades of man ask sharing of potatoes of him, but man not is share, is keeping for self. Man forget potato is for state not for self. One night Politburo fairy visit man at house. Politburo fairy say, ""No is to be worrying, I come is bringing tidings of comradehood."" Man gain reassured feeling. Politburo then take potatoes and kill wife and daughter to teach important lesson of sharing.
Man die of malnourish and depression, not learn lesson. Also no moral to tale, only darkness and suffering.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1d01w3,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1d01w3/old_latvian_folk_tale/,
1372979800.0,289,self.LatvianJokes,1hntkm,Comrades! Do not be deceived!,353,64,29,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1hntkm/comrades_do_not_be_deceived/,"My name is Oskar. Many years ago, I built a raft using the bones of my family and sailed to the great land of America. There, I was greeted with open arms. I was fed, given an education, and opened my own business.
Today, I have returned, to reveal the truth of the politburo agenda! Brothers and sisters of Latvia! You have been misled! The politburo have been--
is still Oskar (not politburo). I make just kiddings hahaha! Is good joke, yes? Politburo good and kind. To prove, come to Politburo HQ for many potato feastings! See new Glorious Brick of Reducations! Bring wife and childrens",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1hntkm,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1hntkm/comrades_do_not_be_deceived/,
1372530146.0,282,self.LatvianJokes,1hbl00,Friend is like potato.,323,41,28,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1hbl00/friend_is_like_potato/,I have no friend. Such is life.,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1hbl00,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1hbl00/friend_is_like_potato/,
1364775958.0,279,imgur.com,1be010,Potato Time! I kid. Is just Latvia Time,319,40,13,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1be010/potato_time_i_kid_is_just_latvia_time/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1be010,http://imgur.com/a/pCic7,
1369951323.0,280,self.LatvianJokes,1fd5h4,Latvian with coin,309,29,16,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fd5h4/latvian_with_coin/,"Latvian man walk down street. Is happy day, has coin from sale of last wife. Outside politboro office, smell of bread leaks out. Man stops when smells delicious smell. Is smelling long time when politboro officer comes out. Says: ""To smell my bread you must pay."" Latvian man is clever and removes coin from pocket. Takes coin, throws it on the ground. It makes clinking sound like distant memory of industry. *clink!*
Man say: ""I smell your bread but do not eat. You hear my coin but do not have.""
Man is killed and coin is forfeit. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1fd5h4,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fd5h4/latvian_with_coin/,
1373918423.0,283,imgur.com,1id11d,The Oatmeal create perfect woman? Must find tanning bed!,398,115,21,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1id11d/the_oatmeal_create_perfect_woman_must_find/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1id11d,http://imgur.com/mYCo2mg,
1371484893.0,276,self.LatvianJokes,1gisl4,Potato Buffet,316,40,21,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gisl4/potato_buffet/,"Hungry man walking on street. Find sign says ""Eat much potato here as you can, your grandson must pay"". Hungry man thinks, son is dead from malnourish, never grandson made. Man ate all kind of potatoes, happyness achieved. Cook gave him 2,000,000 Lats bill. What this is? Man asked. Cook say “ bill of your grandfather u must pay”. Now man in gulag, Tuberculosis. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1gisl4,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gisl4/potato_buffet/,
1368824249.0,270,self.LatvianJokes,1ejgwz,In kapitalist Amerika...,327,57,30,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ejgwz/in_kapitalist_amerika/,Potato is die from malnourish. ,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1ejgwz,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ejgwz/in_kapitalist_amerika/,
1365947636.0,274,self.LatvianJokes,1cbpab,"Cousin, let us go bowling!...",318,44,31,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cbpab/cousin_let_us_go_bowling/,"Comrade Nickolai is having cousin Romanov. Romanov makes call to Nickolai with can on string.
""Cousin, let us go bowling!"" he is saying.
Nickolai is of normal says no, he is busy of making petty crimes, but today he is saying ""Yes, let us go bowling"".
Two cousins walk to the bowling alley and go inside, but is shock! Politburo office! Officiat of politburo is there and so is soldier, they are telling Romanov to sit down.
Officiat speaks, ""Romanov, you cousin was caught making petty crime of panty theive, in exchange for no go gulag he makes informant about you.""
Nickolai speaks, ""Romanov, you have much energy to go bowling all the time, and you is very fat man, how is this in Latvia?!""
Romanov makes cry, ""Nikolai, cousin! How you do this, I am big of bones, not fat, I love you and want spend time together because lonely!""
""Lies!"" Exclaims soldier, he lunges forward and thrusts his bayonet into Romanovs stomach! Bayonet is attached to large stick, kalashnikov having been traded to Estonian tourist for potato.
Romanov clutches stomach! He falls to ground! His tunic spills open but no comrades guts are fall out, instead, a bounty of potatoes!
Romanov cries, and Officiat speaks, ""Nickolai tell us that you conceal potatoes in tunic, no share with village, no report to politburo, is major crime comrade, much worse than panty sniff!"" Nickolai blush.
Officiat, soldier and Nickolai counts potatoes, takes much time because school not so good in Latvia, students mostly make shoes and drink kerosene. Officiat is most educate and finishes making count first.
""Two potatoes!"" he exclaims, ""Is capital crime comrade Romanov!""
But Romanov has made vanish, while three comrades counted potatoes!
Soldier makes movement to hunt for Romanov but comrade Officiat stops him. ""No need to chase comrade, he is have no potatoes, hole in tunic, and he feels the crushing wound of his beloved cousins betrayal, he will no go far. You may go comrade Nickolai.""
Nickolai is relieved and goes outside, he sees tracks from where Romanov ran into forest away from village. Relief becomes crushing shame for Nickolai, his crime would have resulted in work in gulag, cold meal, hard bed, probably release from suffering at hands of guards, but Romanov has suffered much worse hurting by Nickolai.
Nickolai dies of shame and malnourish, for him suffering is over.
Romanov dies in woods of cold and sadness, for him suffering is over.
Soldier dies from making fall out of guard tower after drink too much kerosene, for him suffering is over.
Officiat dies from overeating two confiscate potatoes, for him suffering is over.
Such is life in latvia.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1365948991.0,,,True,t3_1cbpab,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cbpab/cousin_let_us_go_bowling/,
1370304248.0,269,self.LatvianJokes,1fm8mc,Latvian find Magic Lamp,309,40,16,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fm8mc/latvian_find_magic_lamp/,"Latvian man walk to home from empty potato field and find dirty lamp on road. Man rub dirty lamp with dirtier shirt to hoping to clean shirt. Sudden, smoke appear and genie! Genie say to Latvian, ""I grant you three wish."" Latvian say to genie, ""For first wishing: Latvia not so dark."" Genie snap finger and bright light appear. Happy, Latvian say to genie, ""For second wishing: cow for milk and eat."" Genie snap finger and cow walk up next to man. Latvian say to genie, ""For third wishing: no more politburo!"" Genie snap finger and say ""No more politburo, gulag is empty, come see!"" So man walk into gulag to see. But politburo still there. Man now locked in gulag by trick of secret police in genie dress. Cow also member politburo in clever disguise. Bright light hallucinate from malnourish. Man enjoy cleaner shirt from wipe dirt on lamp but sad because forget to wish for potato. Such is life. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1fm8mc,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fm8mc/latvian_find_magic_lamp/,
1365098367.0,271,1.bp.blogspot.com,1boawd,"Grand city, yes?",306,35,38,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1boawd/grand_city_yes/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1boawd,http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TnWe48QTsaA/T0KjDWIGSdI/AAAAAAAAAJI/4CpEtuNwREo/s1600/009.JPG,
1365428638.0,265,self.LatvianJokes,1bx04i,How many Latvia man it take to screw in lightbulb?,318,53,27,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bx04i/how_many_latvia_man_it_take_to_screw_in_lightbulb/,Is invalid question. No electricity in Latvia. Only suffering and secret police.,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1bx04i,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bx04i/how_many_latvia_man_it_take_to_screw_in_lightbulb/,
1363809339.0,270,self.LatvianJokes,1aom98,Is good day.,306,36,31,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aom98/is_good_day/,"Who has two thumb and not die of cold last night? This guy! Still no potato though, and soon politburo come for thumbs.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1aom98,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aom98/is_good_day/,
1374148349.0,266,i.imgur.com,1ijxjt,Westerner video game man is dream of good life,371,105,21,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ijxjt/westerner_video_game_man_is_dream_of_good_life/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1ijxjt,http://i.imgur.com/lN1YiYe.jpg,
1369226679.0,261,self.LatvianJokes,1etwvk,Latvian Space Program send man into space,290,29,35,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1etwvk/latvian_space_program_send_man_into_space/,"Famous Latvian Jānis Bērziņš go to space!
Feel like home. Dark and cold. No potato.
Politburo space control tell Jānis Bērziņš come back to Latvia!
He open window. Space kill fast.
Every man happy in Latvia for Jānis Bērziņš. He suffer is end. Then go to gulag. Happy not allowed in Latvia.
Such is life.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1etwvk,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1etwvk/latvian_space_program_send_man_into_space/,
1371289019.0,259,i.imgur.com,1ge5yo,The summer Latvian dream,323,64,21,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ge5yo/the_summer_latvian_dream/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1ge5yo,http://i.imgur.com/pHDhldS.jpg,
1370948744.0,261,self.LatvianJokes,1g43u8,Is Cake Day,318,57,27,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1g43u8/is_cake_day/,"No Cake.
Only suffer and malnourish.
Such is life. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1g43u8,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1g43u8/is_cake_day/,
1364642700.0,262,self.LatvianJokes,1baq9b,Man find magic lamp in Latvia,304,42,20,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1baq9b/man_find_magic_lamp_in_latvia/,"Man fall in hole and find magic lamp in Latvia. He rub the lamp and genie ask him
""*I grant 3 wishes for you but quick""*
Man say, ""First wish is give me farm as far as I see""
Genie start to run in circles and man is standing in the biggest farm in Latvia. Almost 400 foot long.
Man say second wish, ""Now give me tractors""
Genie start to run in circles and man is get tractors with pedals. glorious better than all Latvia.
Man say final wish, ""Now make field grow patato and me farmer of it""
Genie start to run. Genie run and run for hours but then fall down. Man opens his eyes and he back in hole. Genie not grant wish, genie dead body there dead of malnourish. Man die of malnourish in hole too.
Such is life. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1baq9b,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1baq9b/man_find_magic_lamp_in_latvia/,
1369912873.0,254,self.LatvianJokes,1fbwe2,Man are see flower,281,27,20,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fbwe2/man_are_see_flower/,"Latvian man take wak to rid mind malnourish, see flower. Can't be! Here in cold-dark of Latvia? He are get close, is REAL flower! Man breathe deeply of sweet scent, remember childhood, remember of play glow cabbage football and bedtime fairytales of see sunlight, is filled with happy. Open eyes, is not flower, is [Heracleum Mantegazzianum](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heracleum_mantegazzianum#Phototoxicity), most dangerous and poison plant in all of glorious Latvia. Is first red skin itchies, then blister-skars, then blind. Now forced wander Latvia in perpetual dark-dark. Also steps on splinter.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1fbwe2,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fbwe2/man_are_see_flower/,
1363615983.0,252,self.LatvianJokes,1aiw4b,Humorous friend is tell me jokes about my parents today,283,31,24,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aiw4b/humorous_friend_is_tell_me_jokes_about_my_parents/,"We meet in town square for weekly search for rare delicacy of dead rats and he is tell me many jokes so can pass time.
""So fat is your mother...""
""What is consequence of my mother is fat?""
""So fat is your mother that she must eat many potatoes so to become fat.""
Is so funny I beginning laughter. He is continue:
""I tell Politburo about size of your mother. They take her to field and shoot her in back of head for eating many potatoes.""
""Is good joke. You tell another.""
""I can tell other joke. So old is your father...""
""Is true! Is age 34! What is consequence of my father is old?""
""So old is your father that he is not die of malnourish. He must eat many potatoes so to become old.""
Is so funny I laughter is harder. He is continue:
""I tell Politburo about age of your father. They take him to field and shoot him in back of head for living many years.""
I almost die of laugh.
For them, suffering is over. Is good day.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1aiw4b,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aiw4b/humorous_friend_is_tell_me_jokes_about_my_parents/,
1371185371.0,248,i.imgur.com,1gbj0r,What Latvian man is seeing when get to pearly gate.,317,69,27,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gbj0r/what_latvian_man_is_seeing_when_get_to_pearly_gate/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1gbj0r,http://i.imgur.com/7jfghek.jpg,
1360801278.0,246,self.LatvianJokes,18haoj,Latvian man sell russian soldier daughter for potatoe,278,32,11,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/18haoj/latvian_man_sell_russian_soldier_daughter_for/,"Latvian man sell russian soldier daughter for potatoe. Russian soldier laugh and say, is no potatoe, is brown rock look like potatoe! Man see is true and cry. so long since potatoe.
Years later, russian soldier come back to latvian man, say, I give you real potatoe this time. In barn. Man go to barn and find dead daughter. He no find potatoe. Cry. Eat daughter. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_18haoj,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/18haoj/latvian_man_sell_russian_soldier_daughter_for/,
1367940696.0,248,self.LatvianJokes,1dv70k,Latvian and Estonian meets Amerikansky,283,35,10,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dv70k/latvian_and_estonian_meets_amerikansky/,"Latvian man is in Estonia, visit his snobby cousin. Both go to bar for drinks, hear man speak and can tell is Amerikansky. Capitalist pig offer to buy drinks for Latvian and Estonian, so accept offer. Estonian man ask Amerikcansky, ""What brings you to Estonia, comrade?"" Amerikansky say is to fix radiation leak at power plant.
""Ah, good,"" Latvian man say,""radiation is poison soil, no potatoes grow in Latvia many years now."" All three men continue drink until dark out. Amerikansky tell Latvian and Estonian of many wonders of kapitalist life in Amerika. Every family has cart not requiring horse, whole family can ride in! So many dogs, can own for not make food! And no politburo! Can live life without fear of politburo make rape of daughter and wife! ""Maybe should come to Amerika along with you, comrade!"" Latvian man say.
BANG!! Gunshot!
Amerikansky slide under table, dead! Blood everywhere!
Lativian turn to look, and Estonian cousin hold smoking gun. ""Give me keys to house. You go to Siberia for plan to leave Latvia for life with no politburo!"" Turns out Estonian cousin is politburo spy. Not really cousin either.
Latvian man never have cousin. Or family. Only suffering.
And no punchline, is only cold.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1dv70k,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dv70k/latvian_and_estonian_meets_amerikansky/,
1365321744.0,244,self.LatvianJokes,1budyu,Games of Latvia,264,20,47,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1budyu/games_of_latvia/,"**Guess Who is Secret Police?**
Advise: all are
**Rock, Rock, Rock**
Who will choosing rock?
**Latvian Roulette**
Using pistol. Revolver is cheat.
Let us compile all game for enrichment of Latvian culture. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1budyu,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1budyu/games_of_latvia/,
1366480787.0,241,self.LatvianJokes,1cr394,Latvian is in field...,268,27,11,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cr394/latvian_is_in_field/,"Latvian is in field, lookings for potato. Suddenly, he hear goat, is very happy. Latvian can kill goat, eat for year. He grab rock to kill goat, but is no goat. Is only sound of stomach from malnourish. Man is sad. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1cr394,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cr394/latvian_is_in_field/,
1361660497.0,242,self.LatvianJokes,193pf0,Latvian pirate is walk into bar,275,33,7,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/193pf0/latvian_pirate_is_walk_into_bar/,"Latvian pirate is walk into bar. Have steering wheel in pants.
Bartender ask ""why is steering wheel in pants?""
Pirate not answer. Also is not actually pirate. Is only man delirious from malnourish
edit: grammar",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1361663518.0,,,True,t3_193pf0,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/193pf0/latvian_pirate_is_walk_into_bar/,
1368446518.0,245,self.LatvianJokes,1e8n0k,Hope,275,30,22,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1e8n0k/hope/,"Man ill from malnourish. Cloaked figure walk in room. For first time in life, man have glitter of hope in eye.
-Death, you come for me?
-No, is Politburo. You go gulag, but beating first",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1e8n0k,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1e8n0k/hope/,
1373461578.0,239,self.LatvianJokes,1i06fk,Boy learn to read,283,44,25,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1i06fk/boy_learn_to_read/,"He tell father ""Father! I can reading, have find good fortune!""
Father say ""Such wonderful news! You can get job and make many money for buy potato""
Boy die in night from starve. All are sad.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1i06fk,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1i06fk/boy_learn_to_read/,
1375860673.0,238,self.LatvianJokes,1jvccn,My grandpapa escape gulag and Latvia!,269,31,24,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1jvccn/my_grandpapa_escape_gulag_and_latvia/,"One day, politiburo take grandpapa to gulag, and are having put him in tall tower which is having window. Is very high up, great monument of the peoples. He is having decided he will escape. He grows beard and hair much long after years in gulag. He takes hair and beard and make rope! He tie to window bar, and then is having himself hang. He ends suffer. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1jvccn,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1jvccn/my_grandpapa_escape_gulag_and_latvia/,
1374775915.0,241,self.LatvianJokes,1j1j83,"Is recipe for White Latvian, Official Mix Drink of Latvia",276,35,30,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1j1j83/is_recipe_for_white_latvian_official_mix_drink_of/,"Is perfect drink for celebrate funeral.
Is Yield: 1 Cocktail
Ingredient:
1 part snow from ground, 0 part vodka (all taken by Politburo).
Preparating:
1. Find place where hole in roof let snow onto floor.
2. Is collect snow in glass.
3. Is stir.
Drink up! But glass is broke, have sharp edge, cut lip. Such is life.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1j1j83,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1j1j83/is_recipe_for_white_latvian_official_mix_drink_of/,
1366030969.0,240,self.LatvianJokes,1cdxat,Why is Politburo always in groups of three?,273,33,20,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cdxat/why_is_politburo_always_in_groups_of_three/,One can read. One can write. Other is keeping the eyes on intellectuals.,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1cdxat,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cdxat/why_is_politburo_always_in_groups_of_three/,
1369851381.0,234,self.LatvianJokes,1fa6pp,Is Amerikansky who move to Latvia for hear of great work. Is here to remove misconception of Amerika. Ask Anything.,288,54,77,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fa6pp/is_amerikansky_who_move_to_latvia_for_hear_of/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1fa6pp,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fa6pp/is_amerikansky_who_move_to_latvia_for_hear_of/,
1367789280.0,234,self.LatvianJokes,1dr33n,"Comrades, Latvia man saw Sun today!",276,42,27,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dr33n/comrades_latvia_man_saw_sun_today/,"Just kidding, is radiation from power plant explosion. Also, no potato.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1dr33n,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dr33n/comrades_latvia_man_saw_sun_today/,
1373992863.0,232,self.LatvianJokes,1if82l,Comrades! I have come up with new way of forget suffering!,277,45,50,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1if82l/comrades_i_have_come_up_with_new_way_of_forget/,"Is choose own adventure time! Here is how works!
* I come up with premise
* You choose one path of adventure
* Suffering is forgotten! Simple!
**Here is premise!**
Is dark and cold night, like any latvian night.
You are alone in yurt. Son die of malnourish, daughter raped and taken by politburo and wife die of bear.
You have eaten last bit of edible root and rock soup and are starving. You think of end suffering by hit head on rock, but you ate last rock. Is sad for a while.
Suddenly knock on door! You ask who is it, stranger outside door say politburo!
Now, comrades, what you do?
* Let stranger in to yurt, you are good citizen of glorious Latvia after all.
* You panic! Not want to go to gulag! Excuse yourself to stranger and burst through yurt's backside (latvian craftmanship not very good) and run to forest.
* You prepare to fight stranger! You take bone of son who still lies in corner of yurt and slowly open door.
Choose wisely comrades, wrong move may result in death!
**DISKLAIMER**
*Actual death not guaranteed. I am sorry.*
",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1if82l,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1if82l/comrades_i_have_come_up_with_new_way_of_forget/,
1367573351.0,235,25.media.tumblr.com,1dlzlm,Is most famous Latvia pornstars.,301,66,12,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1dlzlm/is_most_famous_latvia_pornstars/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1dlzlm,http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1tez94EYA1qm6oc3o1_500.gif,
1375509077.0,230,self.LatvianJokes,1jm3q3,"hello fellow Latvian men, I is have many news",273,43,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1jm3q3/hello_fellow_latvian_men_i_is_have_many_news/,"I is die yesterday of many malnourish. I is have woken in Hell. IS WONDERFUL PLACE! is no cold! No Politburo! Is no Gulag! Is suffer, but no suffer like Latvia suffer.
EDIT: I is have hallusinate again of Malnourish. Is still in Latvia. Is no news, only suffering.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1jm3q3,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1jm3q3/hello_fellow_latvian_men_i_is_have_many_news/,
1371847623.0,233,self.LatvianJokes,1gtg6r,Latvia better than Amerika,278,45,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gtg6r/latvia_better_than_amerika/,"1. Amerikaninskis mad about bad privacy. Latvians never had privacy, so no mad.
2. Latvians no have cell phones to bug, only rocks.
3. Latvians have no one to call, family all dead from malnourish. Such is life.
4. Latvians no suffer from Kardashians, Kanye, or Lohan.
5. Many Amerikaniskis not know from where next meal is coming. Latvians know no meal is coming. Just coldness.
6. Amerikaninskis have high divorce rate; Latvian wife die of malnourish. No divorce.
",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1gtg6r,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gtg6r/latvia_better_than_amerika/,
1365787277.0,231,self.LatvianJokes,1c7u2v,Why number 6 is so much fear number 7?,263,32,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c7u2v/why_number_6_is_so_much_fear_number_7/,"Nobody is know this. Only Latvian mathematician is die of malnourish. School children are use time of mathematica lesson for scrape frozen field, sing song about dream of potato grow. But salt from tears is only make land infertile. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1365787830.0,,OoL,True,t3_1c7u2v,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c7u2v/why_number_6_is_so_much_fear_number_7/,
1369529531.0,234,self.LatvianJokes,1f23hz,LATVIA LIFE HACKS,271,37,16,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f23hz/latvia_life_hacks/,"Greetings glorious komrades, I know times is tough for you all so I make good tips on how improve life with not much things, like how cook when desperate need nourish, but is no much food.
1. **Easy shoes substitute**: In Latvia, is hard get shoes. Many Latvia men wear nothing on feet, but then feet is freeze and man die. Unfortunately, is no way to get shoe, so instead of waste feet to freeze, just chop off feet and eat!
2. **Easy fire:** But wait! What is I hear? You no like raw feet? Okay! In Latvia is hard to make fire. Is no fuel, and is very cold. Instead of eating raw feet, please, report neighbor to Politburo! Roast feet and warm self after house burn down.
3. **Easy sex:** Many Latvia man have daughter, but no wife. Is okay! Make sex on daughter, marry her, and make new daughter!
4. **Easy make salt:** During sex on daughter, collect delicious tears in cup. After many sex you have free salt!
5. **Easy make water:** But wait! What is I hear? Daughter no make tear because dehydrate? Urinate in bottle, tell daughter is water, wait for hydrate, now make sex and get salt!
6. **Easy cure headache:** In Latvia, all life is headache! That mean if want cure headache, must cure life first! Too easy. Is lay down in ice floor in bedroom and wait for death.
7. **Easy escape from gulag:** Same steps as cure headache!
8. **Easy become Amerikansky:** Walk to Politburo and proclaim you kapitalist pig! Politburo recognize you as Amerikansky, many congratulation to you, komrade! Best part of this hack? Is bonus of cure headache too!
9. **Easy find wife:** If no have wife, go to gulag! Many years hard labor, no food, make hallucinate often. Free wife! If have wife, but no can find, go to gulag! She already there!
10. **Easy stop rape:** This one for Latvia ladies! Is soldier rape you many time? Easiest way to stop rape is also *only* way to stop rape! Just let soldier finish!
I hope this life hack many assist on you, comrades!",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1369542426.0,,,True,t3_1f23hz,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f23hz/latvia_life_hacks/,
1373388348.0,233,self.LatvianJokes,1hxzqg,"Is Politburo man, Latvian and Estonian walking",277,44,17,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1hxzqg/is_politburo_man_latvian_and_estonian_walking/,"And they coming across of Genie. He grant one wish to each man. Latvian go first ""I wanting large farm with many many potato and no soldiers come to rapings family or burn farm or sendings Siberia"" and genie grant wish. Latvian is very happy. Politburo man's turn. He say he want large wall around Latvia, as high as the sky, to keep kapitalist propaganda out. Is so. Asshole Estonian fill in with water. Is happen. Asshole Estonian is kindest man, he end Latvian nightmare for everyone",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1hxzqg,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1hxzqg/is_politburo_man_latvian_and_estonian_walking/,
1372115234.0,233,i.imgur.com,1h01i4,Kolvandus un Horbas! Is for funny,291,58,13,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1h01i4/kolvandus_un_horbas_is_for_funny/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1h01i4,http://i.imgur.com/FbLZuWC.png,
1364337897.0,226,self.LatvianJokes,1b2m4f,What is difference between Latvian and lemming?,251,25,15,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b2m4f/what_is_difference_between_latvian_and_lemming/,Latvian know why he jump off cliff ,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1b2m4f,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b2m4f/what_is_difference_between_latvian_and_lemming/,
1363008880.0,229,self.LatvianJokes,1a2wtg,Latvian Democracy,248,19,13,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1a2wtg/latvian_democracy/,"Amerika Democracy: You have sack of potatoes, you eat half and plant half, your field of potatoes grows and you sell potatoes to the peoples of Amerika, you pay some taxes to country and retire on the profits of potato business.
Latvian Democracy: You have sack of potatoes, wake up, is dream, Government learn of this dream, send army to house and shoot you.
",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1a2wtg,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1a2wtg/latvian_democracy/,
1374289650.0,227,self.LatvianJokes,1iobbm,Latvia man play russian roulette for potato...,267,40,24,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1iobbm/latvia_man_play_russian_roulette_for_potato/,Either way is win.,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1iobbm,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1iobbm/latvia_man_play_russian_roulette_for_potato/,
1364575224.0,229,self.LatvianJokes,1b901l,"An Englishman, an Irishman and a Latvian go to a bar",284,55,10,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b901l/an_englishman_an_irishman_and_a_latvian_go_to_a/,"An Englishman, an Irishman and a Latvian go in to a bar. Latvian say is good
as can buy drink but is not afford as too poor.
Latvian ask Englishman and Irishman if has will buy drink. They not understand
as do not speak Latvian. Englishman and Irishman is get drunk
and beat Latvian man and give brain damage. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1b901l,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b901l/an_englishman_an_irishman_and_a_latvian_go_to_a/,
1374875517.0,222,self.LatvianJokes,1j4huq,Genie,259,37,10,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1j4huq/genie/,"Three mens are walk in searching potato.
Men finds lamp.
He rub a lamp, and genie of magic appear.
Genie saying ""Each of men get 1 wishes.""
Man 1 say "" I want happiest man in all of town.""
Genie is give him 3 potato.
Man 2 saying ""I want happier than hims"".
Genie give 4 potato.
Man 3 say ""I want to be happiest in all of a country.""
Genie kill man. End suffer.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1j4huq,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1j4huq/genie/,
1365686669.0,224,self.LatvianJokes,1c4sb5,"Here is funny joke. You make the ""ha"" with your mouth.",257,33,24,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c4sb5/here_is_funny_joke_you_make_the_ha_with_your_mouth/,"knock on door. Who is? Is politburo to take to gulag! Oh no! But man has plan! Man put clothes on daughter for to send to gulag as trick! Success! But is cold, man has naked, die from hypotherm. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1c4sb5,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c4sb5/here_is_funny_joke_you_make_the_ha_with_your_mouth/,
1374945472.0,225,self.LatvianJokes,1j62l4,Latvian Moon,258,33,22,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1j62l4/latvian_moon/,"Latvian pilot on mission to spy over neighbors hear dirty Estonian man say moon is made of cheese, so as good Latvian, he report to Politburo!
Politburo pull many string, and get this top bi-plane pilot onto next Soviet rocket to moon!
When Latvian arrive on moon, he find that Amerikansky flag is already there! He take picture for to report back to Politburo. Politburo hear of this and have soviets leave Latvian on moon so he cannot spread rumours of kapitalist conquests.
Latvian is ok with this, he already so hungry he start to believe moon is cheese, and take off helmet for to eat. He dies hero of the people.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1j62l4,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1j62l4/latvian_moon/,
1373840088.0,222,imgur.com,1iat39,Praise Politburo! Great minds have made first Latvian Komputor!,306,84,26,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1iat39/praise_politburo_great_minds_have_made_first/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1iat39,http://imgur.com/LoCBaef,
1374517042.0,223,self.LatvianJokes,1itse6,For glory of all Latvia,266,43,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1itse6/for_glory_of_all_latvia/,"Is glorious day in Latvia! Russian comrades give plans for bright future, make nuclear reactor. Is many leak, but no matter- Politburo wish to demonstrate Latvian future, make many reporters come with camera. Politburo find young man from field, make him wear special suit and stand next to reactor for camera to demonstrate safe use for all of Latvia. But reactor leak more, get hot.
Politburo member lean into microphone, say ""Brave Janis! Tell last words to state newspaper, become first hero for glorious nuclear progamme! How do you feel?"" Janis say- ""Is not cold. Still hungry.""",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1itse6,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1itse6/for_glory_of_all_latvia/,
1362270697.0,218,self.LatvianJokes,19jtu3,"Finally, after 3 day search, I have found a sack of potato: ",238,20,12,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/19jtu3/finally_after_3_day_search_i_have_found_a_sack_of/,is empty,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_19jtu3,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/19jtu3/finally_after_3_day_search_i_have_found_a_sack_of/,
1372017283.0,215,self.LatvianJokes,1gxa9t,"Latvian man has father in Gulag, many far away, wants to visit....",244,29,14,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gxa9t/latvian_man_has_father_in_gulag_many_far_away/,"Asks other Latvian man, ""What is quickest way to Gulag?"" Politburo overhear, give man free trip to Gulag. Is nice story, no? Politburo always your friend. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1gxa9t,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gxa9t/latvian_man_has_father_in_gulag_many_far_away/,
1368937316.0,214,self.LatvianJokes,1em631,Man of Bat capture enemy Joker,244,30,25,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1em631/man_of_bat_capture_enemy_joker/,"Man of Bat capture enemy name of Joker. Man of Bat always have sad and angry, Joker always have happy...is perhaps crazy from malnourish.
Joker: Why is serious?
Man of Bat: Parents is dead.
Joker: For them, suffering is end.
Now Man of Bat is happy, because parents suffer is end.
Man of Bat: Why you have happy?
Joker: Everything funny!
Man of Bat: Is not funny. Men die in gulag, women kidnapped. Where is funny?
Joker is lose happy. Change name to Misery.
Man of Bat then realize that while for parents, suffering end, he must live longer without potato. Man of Bat now have sad again, too. Such is life in Latvia.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1368974515.0,,,True,t3_1em631,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1em631/man_of_bat_capture_enemy_joker/,
1364404269.0,217,i.imgur.com,1b4bv6,"Hang in there, brothers!",264,47,9,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b4bv6/hang_in_there_brothers/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1b4bv6,http://i.imgur.com/cUUy3Lp.jpg,
1369173761.0,212,i.imgur.com,1esjy0,Is beautiful day in Latvia! Here picture of weather of today.,261,49,16,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1esjy0/is_beautiful_day_in_latvia_here_picture_of/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1esjy0,http://i.imgur.com/sXtgOb0.jpg,
1370524711.0,215,self.LatvianJokes,1fsdsh,Latvia set new record!,250,35,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fsdsh/latvia_set_new_record/,"Latvia lowest in 2013 for electricity related deaths.....
Premise NOT ridiculous, no power in Latvia. Only cold , and darkness.
Such is life.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1fsdsh,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fsdsh/latvia_set_new_record/,
1365986406.0,212,self.LatvianJokes,1ccwp0,SCP-14682,254,42,50,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ccwp0/scp14682/,"**Item #:** SCP-14682
**Object Class:** Keter
**Special Containment Procedures:** 14682 is hide in Secret Shack-21, to guard by most best in Foundation security people. Security man is must not be told what is of SCP-14682, nor is anyone else of must know. Only got approve Level-4 science men appoint by O5 command must know is 14682. If containment is of breach, protocol-0125 is of engaged: all man of see 14682 is of terminated immediately by of provide no food, and create starve death. All other man whom suspected aware of 14682 is of treat with Class-M amnesiacs (give only enough food to make crippling brain damage).
**Description:** SCP-14682 is only potato to be of found in Latvia. 14682 is of discover in [DATA MALNOURISHED] by local farm man. Farm man is of very happy, and is of tell of find to all of village. Politburo soon notify of potato, and is sent secret police to investigate. Secret police terminate farm man and all village, and is take potato. It is then anomalous properties of 14682 is manifest. All of man whom know of 14682 existence, and of especially seen 14682, is given of hope and joy. Is very good, until person is of reintroduce to struggle and horror of Latvia, then person is of given worst damage of psychological, sometimes is even result in intentional malnourish and suicide. Once secret police unit sent to recover potato is of heavily affect and most dead, Foundation is of notify.
Mobile Task Force Iota-13 ""food watchers"" is of dispatch to is contain threat, but already 14682 affect many man of secret police, politburo, and even of common villager. MTF I-13 quickly terminate all heavily affect or seen 14682, and give Class-M amnesiac to all suspect of knowing 14682. However still is of great damage done to Latvia, and so is must be of contain with of utmost important.
Recently approve give by O5 command to for Foundation to of research 14682. Research has of been done to see if attempt of replicate 14682 possible, currently it is of not so. Experiment 14682-18N carry out October [DATA MALNOURISHED], where Class-D man from gulag given .05g scrape from 14682 to consume, subject heavily affect, resulting in [DATA MALNOURISHED] with over 400 casualty to Foundation. O5 command is of prohibit more of similar experiment, all personal of disobey order is sent Siberia.
**Addendum-14682-01A:** After 4 year of study, Foundation research men is of conclude that, of very unfortune, SCP-14682 is not potato, but only rock that look almost identical to potato. Still, 14682 is still classify as Keter as destructive property still is of remain, and could of cause XK Class End-Of-Struggle event. Research to see is 14682 can be of use to synthesize real potato still goings on, but is not look promising. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1366078900.0,,,True,t3_1ccwp0,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ccwp0/scp14682/,
1373932825.0,210,self.LatvianJokes,1idkg1,[META] When did this sub turn into /r/potato?,249,39,41,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1idkg1/meta_when_did_this_sub_turn_into_rpotato/,"Seriously, the reason I subscribed to this subreddit was to read some mock-Latvian humor. If you go to the all-time top posts of this subreddit, there is absolute gold that still makes me laugh every time I read it. Now, the top four posts on the front page are literally just links to potato-themed pictures.
Firstly, I firmly believe this subreddit should be text-only. /r/jokes is text-only and there are high quality posts on it constantly. With the ability to post links, this subreddit has just become a place for minor karma whoring with posts that aren't funny and don't fit the goal of this subreddit. Second, people need to remember the point of this subreddit and try to maintain it as a quality sub. The best humor on this sub is sneakily very intelligent, but the majority of the posts lately have been juvenile and lazy. I fear people are going to eventually get really tired of the unfunny repetition, and movement away from the subreddit's original purpose, and just leave, and I don't think any of us actually want that.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1idkg1,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1idkg1/meta_when_did_this_sub_turn_into_rpotato/,
1369520672.0,213,self.LatvianJokes,1f1v3w,Latvian history.,244,31,30,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f1v3w/latvian_history/,"Is ancient time of in Latvian Empire, all man is rich and prosper much. Many Latvian man have goat and snow camel and dog. Is wonderful Latvians. Goat give man fur, camel give ice milk, dog give man companion of friendly.
Is two later years.
Latvian empire fall for Kommunist Russia. Is politburo. Army of Red are kill all men. Women is raped and dies much. Only children with malnourishing play in radioactive fields. But no play. Only hallucinate. Boy remember time when family eat dog companion and goat egg for survive, only week later die. Boy shed single tear.
Politburo beat boy for take tear, send lab for study. Put boy work gulag for many tear.
Latvian man is close tear soaked history book. Politburo execute.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1369520880.0,,,True,t3_1f1v3w,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f1v3w/latvian_history/,
1360827719.0,209,self.LatvianJokes,18i530,Latvia Games,239,30,13,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/18i530/latvia_games/,"Man come from America to visit the Latvia. He ask Latvia man if he want play game Hot Potato. Latvian man lose game, have burned hands. Worth it. Got potato. Best day of life.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_18i530,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/18i530/latvia_games/,
1363635300.0,209,self.LatvianJokes,1ajj37,Birthday gift,239,30,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ajj37/birthday_gift/,"Latvia man is have birthday. Lived twenty and eight years. Hungry. Wife dead, daughter missing. In such old age man know he dies soon.
Leave home. Says goodbye to dead wife grave. Goes to look for death.
First he is come upon farmer. Ask farmer for plow to end life. But farmer say, ""Politburo have taken plow.""
Man goes to Politburo, ask plow. But no plow: Politburo broke beating prisoner. Police put him in prison for asking.
Prison cell cold, floor dirt. In cell find head of plow, scrap of cloth, and stalk. Cloth was daughter's dress. She was prisoner.
Man unearths stalk. Buried in dirt is potato. He eat potato.
Then cries, because he did not get his birthday gift: he now lives another day. For him, suffering continue.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1ajj37,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ajj37/birthday_gift/,
1370549020.0,208,self.LatvianJokes,1ftal5,"Latvia soon to adopting ""Yuro"" as new currency.",249,41,24,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ftal5/latvia_soon_to_adopting_yuro_as_new_currency/,"Is joke! No things to sell or buy in Latvia. Only daughters to sell in Latvia for rope to hang self. Only Aristokrat rich to nourish many daughters to sell for rope. End of suffer.
Such is Aristokrat life in Latvia.
Is also joke! Politburo rape daughters and send Aristokrat to gulag.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1370557177.0,,,True,t3_1ftal5,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ftal5/latvia_soon_to_adopting_yuro_as_new_currency/,
1369923943.0,202,reddit.com,1fc5tj,"/r/LatvianJokes, you are Subreddit of the Day! Congratulations!",230,28,14,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fc5tj/rlatvianjokes_you_are_subreddit_of_the_day/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1fc5tj,http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/1fc53u/rlatvianjokes_you_are_subreddit_of_the_day/,
1376017148.0,199,self.LatvianJokes,1k03k4,Latvia Grammar Lesson,226,27,22,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1k03k4/latvia_grammar_lesson/,"Hello my komrads, Yurik here, and is boring here in gulag. I still do not have knowings of how gulag superviso r afford elektrik typing machine for all prisoner but no can give single drop of his urinations for to drink.
Ahh well.
I notise bad grammar of fellow Latvians here and is disgusting. Hungerings do no mean is can be stupid, too. Wife rape by soldier? Is no mean you talk like filthy Amerikansky.
**1.** In Glorious Latvia, we have one thing in of kommons with Kapitalist pigs, we make usings of punctuation same. Latvia has best punctuation makings in world.
**2.** We do not know Western luxurie spellings of words.
**3.** In Latvia, is no knowledge of future tense. Future bleak, never know when die and suffering end. Is why we always use word ""is"" often as possible. Always speak in now tense.
**4.** Wonderful Politburo is making of war effort against Estonia pigs. As it say in side bar, ""Is shortage of letter C in latvia, please do not use. Use letter K or S instead!""
**5.** Rape you is what Amerikansky spies do. Latvian always make *of* rape *on* you.
**6.** Is no word for ""house"" in Latvia. Is yurt. Is shed. Is dirt. Is kave. Is gulag. Is grave. No is ""house.""
**7.** In Latvia, we no have much. Rarely have more than one of somethings. To kompensate and give hope, we is make many thing in plurals when typings.
**8.** Is always kapitalise Politburo and Chief Supervisor and ~~Sekrit Polise~~ and
**9.** JUST KIDDINGS. Is no such thing as Sekrit Polise, but remember always upper casings on Sekrit Polise anyway.
**10.** Is no use word ""kapitalize"" unless Amerikansky spy. Come down to Politburo office for more tips on makings of good grammar for to post jokings on site!",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1376027626.0,,,True,t3_1k03k4,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1k03k4/latvia_grammar_lesson/,
1374813399.0,198,self.LatvianJokes,1j2ty0,Is Latvian time traveler,230,32,15,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1j2ty0/is_latvian_time_traveler/,"Man in Latvia is tired of life. Has no food or house and family is killed by Politburo. Is think to self, ""I will put out of misery. I will sit in cold until I meet death of freeze."" Is go outside during cold Latvian August and remove rags of cloth and wait for freeze. Man freeze, he think, but then is awaken by other man.
""Where is?"" says first man.
""Is future,"" says second man. ""You is freeze self for thousand years.""
""What have missed?"" says first man.
""Well,"" says second man, ""in America, is built a rocket so fast, can travel to other end of universe and bring back jewels of diamond and ruby.""
""What else?"" says first man.
""In Africa,"" says second man, ""machine made that make infinite food. Create much happiness there, save many lives.""
""What of here?"" says first man.
""Politburo is overthrown. Latvia wives and daughters rejoice. Men work fourteen hours of day at most. We is have biggest harvest ever.""
First man is faint with happy. ""Is true?"" he asks.
Second man laughs. ""No. Is joke. I am Politburo. You is get back to work or I am sawing off arm of frozen man from past."" And so he does.
Story has moral. Is no escape from life in Latvia, only endless toil and suffer. Is all there will ever be.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1j2ty0,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1j2ty0/is_latvian_time_traveler/,
1369826209.0,200,i.imgur.com,1f9g6z,"Is my birthday. Before politburo come and rape wife for to make present, she is make special breakfast for me. I take fotograf",239,39,16,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1f9g6z/is_my_birthday_before_politburo_come_and_rape/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1f9g6z,http://i.imgur.com/7jq6Waw.jpg,
1365891910.0,199,self.LatvianJokes,1cak7f,Magic wish cliff,219,20,21,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cak7f/magic_wish_cliff/,"Is 3 man on top of magic wishing cliff. 1 man estonia, 1 man russia, 1 man latvia. Men read of sign beside cliff that say ""Jump off cliff, to saying wish, is get wish!"". Estonia man jump of cliff, say ""I want be politburo!"", man is land on ground and is being greet by fellow politburo comrade! Russia man jump off cliff is saying ""Many vodka!"", man is land in pool of vodka. Latvia man turn, he jump off cliff say ""I no want suffer and wife not die malnourish!"", man turn into potato, wife eat of potato. Man is end suffer!",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1cak7f,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cak7f/magic_wish_cliff/,
1375219753.0,196,self.LatvianJokes,1jdkuq,Latvia man is go to Olympik game.,232,36,25,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1jdkuq/latvia_man_is_go_to_olympik_game/,"Politburo is give strong Latvia man permission to go to next Olympik game, bekause is in Russia, no exposur to kapitalist dogs. Is say, ""you win Olympik game for glorious Latvia, family is reseive two potato.""
Latvia man is very eksite, bekause rumor say in Olympik village is make eat as many potato as want. Is true! He no more malnourish. Make more strong and win for Latvia.
Man is happy to return Latvia as glorious hero. Is go to Politburo offis to kollekt potato. But bekause is experiens easy life with no suffer or malnourish, man want not two, but three potato.
Politburo angry, is say ""no potato for you."" Man reseive life sentens in gulag for tshallenge authority of glorious Politburo and spread rumor of kapitalist lies. Medal is melt to make gun for end suffer of gulag inmate.
Sutsh is life.
Edit: Politburo is konfiskate all letter ""si"" for war effort.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1375280561.0,,,True,t3_1jdkuq,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1jdkuq/latvia_man_is_go_to_olympik_game/,
1374455050.0,198,self.LatvianJokes,1is6ao,Soldier is so nice. He tell my wife she is most beautiful woman in all of Latvia,257,59,30,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1is6ao/soldier_is_so_nice_he_tell_my_wife_she_is_most/,that he make rape with,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1is6ao,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1is6ao/soldier_is_so_nice_he_tell_my_wife_she_is_most/,
1371982183.0,195,i.imgur.com,1gwidv,Child dream gift,251,56,16,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gwidv/child_dream_gift/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1gwidv,http://i.imgur.com/T00fs8N.jpg,
1365214769.0,196,self.LatvianJokes,1brwsb,Amerikan dream,212,16,18,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1brwsb/amerikan_dream/,"In Latvia, story told of famous Latvian emigrant. He travel to Amerika, sail thousands mile with only a rock for floating. When arrive, he see man carry potato openly! Latvian man kill this potato baron, but secret police catch! Potato confiscate, and secret police order execute. Such is life, say Latvian.
But there is twisting. Secret police give potato for final eating prior to execute. Having both potato and end suffering? Premise ridiculous. Surely must be hallucinate. But is not. Is Amerikan Dream. ",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1365225996.0,,,True,t3_1brwsb,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1brwsb/amerikan_dream/,
1364826897.0,193,self.LatvianJokes,1bf9le,Secret police knock on door,216,23,14,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bf9le/secret_police_knock_on_door/,"Secret police knock on Latvia man door. Latvia man answer door.
""Who you are?""
""We secret police""
Latvia man shaking terrified, not only fear but also cold.
""April fool!"" say secret police.
Latvia man understand is joke and invite tricksters in humble home for company.
Was no April fool.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1bf9le,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bf9le/secret_police_knock_on_door/,
1367128374.0,189,self.LatvianJokes,1d9d0l,Magic Potato,226,37,10,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1d9d0l/magic_potato/,"Three Latvian man are find magic potato. Potato grants three wish, and each Latvian take one.
First Latvian is humble. Wish for one potato only. Magic potato is give two.
Second Latvian is brave. Is wish to protect daughter and wife from rape. Magic potato is give dog for protect, and extra dog for eating.
Third Latvian is dreamer. Is wish for better life for Latvians. Magic potato call Politburo, and all is kill. Suffering is end for three men.
Magic potato is truly generous. But Politburo take, and is wish for more guns. Is use gun to rape all Latvian daughter and burn all Latvian village. Dark day for Latvians. Politburo is also eat magic potato. All is sad.
",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1d9d0l,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1d9d0l/magic_potato/,
1365782059.0,191,self.LatvianJokes,1c7nbv,I am simple Latvian who enjoy joke like you! What are names of other Latvians we know who like joke?,217,26,36,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c7nbv/i_am_simple_latvian_who_enjoy_joke_like_you_what/,Please list name of family members here.,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1c7nbv,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c7nbv/i_am_simple_latvian_who_enjoy_joke_like_you_what/,
1366296545.0,191,self.LatvianJokes,1clwh2,Latvian MacGyver,217,26,10,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1clwh2/latvian_macgyver/,Is try to make potato out of cold and dark. Taken by Politburo. ,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1clwh2,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1clwh2/latvian_macgyver/,
1365518912.0,190,self.LatvianJokes,1bzpcr,Why did chicken cross road?,234,44,24,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bzpcr/why_did_chicken_cross_road/,Is no chicken in Latvia. Hallucination from cold. Such is life. ,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1bzpcr,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bzpcr/why_did_chicken_cross_road/,
1364117906.0,190,self.LatvianJokes,1awoi8,Latvian has potato and walk into bar...,224,34,19,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1awoi8/latvian_has_potato_and_walk_into_bar/,Sorry I stutter from famish. Walk into barbarian. He take Latvias last potato. ,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1awoi8,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1awoi8/latvian_has_potato_and_walk_into_bar/,
1366214554.0,190,self.LatvianJokes,1cjf2p,Greeting from Estonia!,212,22,21,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cjf2p/greeting_from_estonia/,"Want come to Estonia? Come to border near gulag. Bring family.
No this not politboro trick.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1cjf2p,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1cjf2p/greeting_from_estonia/,
1363091593.0,187,self.LatvianJokes,1a56sb,Knock knock,210,23,12,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1a56sb/knock_knock/,"""Who is there?""
Nobody.
Sound is not door. Is sound of teeth chattering.
So cold.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1a56sb,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1a56sb/knock_knock/,
1365855146.0,189,self.LatvianJokes,1c9k8a,Is gangster,245,56,30,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c9k8a/is_gangster/,"Fuck the politboro. Fuck, fuck politboro. Rape sister, take potatoe, even dead mother think mind is gone. I release rap, now malnourish. Suffer end and still be ghost at cochella. for latvia. Peace.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1c9k8a,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1c9k8a/is_gangster/,
1368759150.0,189,self.LatvianJokes,1ehtm6,"""The Aristokrats""",221,32,10,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ehtm6/the_aristokrats/,"Family of Latvians walk into state-operated talent agency. Is end of day and talent agent he say ""No want see. Have seen many people today please."" Father say ""Give two minutes please. We have good act."" Talent agent sigh and give in, say ""Is okay. But only two minutes.""
Father, mother, son, daughter proceed take off clothing. But is too cold in Latvia for not wear clothing and all die instantly. Talent agent go up to clothing pile. Notice clothings all only have total of only few dozen moth-holes. Then feel in pocket of daughter. Daughter have piece of old stale moldy bread. Talent agent say ""Wow! Are Aristokrats!""",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1368761081.0,,,True,t3_1ehtm6,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ehtm6/the_aristokrats/,
1368329988.0,188,reddit.com,1e5zru,"Congratulations, /r/LatvianJokes! You are to be our Subreddit of the Day today!",220,32,28,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1e5zru/congratulations_rlatvianjokes_you_are_to_be_our/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1e5zru,http://www.reddit.com/r/subredditoftheday/comments/1e5zqt/may_12_2013_rlatvianjokes_the_neverending/,
1370640413.0,187,imgur.com,1fw0qh,Is Politburo Meeting,221,34,11,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fw0qh/is_politburo_meeting/,,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,False,t3_1fw0qh,http://imgur.com/vfy2mvr,
1370045296.0,189,self.LatvianJokes,1ffqym,why did Latvian boy throw alarm clock out window?,217,28,20,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ffqym/why_did_latvian_boy_throw_alarm_clock_out_window/,Because there is no job for wake up to.,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1ffqym,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1ffqym/why_did_latvian_boy_throw_alarm_clock_out_window/,
1364489990.0,187,self.LatvianJokes,1b6q2q,Occasion of reasonable joy,213,26,9,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b6q2q/occasion_of_reasonable_joy/,"Man is at bury of dead son. Is very happy for end of suffer. Man muster strength to make joke, says ""What has thumbs and dead child?"" Wife say ""What?"" Man say ""Luckiest man in world."" Man's thumbs have been take long ago. Cold wind blows across graveyard, mess up hair of wife.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1b6q2q,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b6q2q/occasion_of_reasonable_joy/,
1369868172.0,181,self.LatvianJokes,1fasvw,ANNOUNCE all upvote must be ban.,215,34,14,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fasvw/announce_all_upvote_must_be_ban/,When make upvote forbidden food is appear from rock. Must be ban because no-forbidden-food-week.,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1fasvw,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1fasvw/announce_all_upvote_must_be_ban/,
1363582312.0,181,self.LatvianJokes,1aiatu,Man Is Walk In Bar,207,26,4,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aiatu/man_is_walk_in_bar/,"He walk to tender of bar and ask ""I have just make much of money. I will now like two potato."" Reply of bartender is ""Two potato? Impossible, how such money!"" Man tell ""I have much money in deal make recent. I now have rich like Amerika!"" But bartender is actual politburo and shoot man because obviously is crime. No man afford two potato.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1aiatu,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1aiatu/man_is_walk_in_bar/,
1365507266.0,178,self.LatvianJokes,1bzeuh,[MODPOST] Is change in rule from Central Committee: Pictures of potato are counter-revolutionary,209,31,31,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bzeuh/modpost_is_change_in_rule_from_central_committee/,"**Please upvote for visibility**
Previous rule state no unedited pictures of potato. And yet, still so many posted. New rule makes for clarification: **do not post pictures of potato.** Post those at /r/potato.
If people keep make these posts, only other option for mods will be to make selfpost-only, which might take away some good, thoughtful jokes. Please do not make happen.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1bzeuh,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1bzeuh/modpost_is_change_in_rule_from_central_committee/,moderator
1358790164.0,179,self.LatvianJokes,16zyhp,Siberia,199,20,17,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/16zyhp/siberia/,"Man is hungry. He steal bread to feed family. Get home, find all family have gone Siberia! “More bread for me,” man think. But bread have worm.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,1358792325.0,,,True,t3_16zyhp,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/16zyhp/siberia/,
1371690004.0,180,self.LatvianJokes,1gp2p3,Yo mamma is being so fat...,208,28,19,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gp2p3/yo_mamma_is_being_so_fat/,...she is weigh 10 pounds.,,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1gp2p3,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1gp2p3/yo_mamma_is_being_so_fat/,
1364312445.0,178,self.LatvianJokes,1b1o32,Men Fight over Potato,213,35,29,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b1o32/men_fight_over_potato/,"One day long ago in Latvia two man find potato on road. First man recognize potato from when he was boy and loved potato. Other man say it is now his potato. They take potato to judge who say ""split potato in two and both have one half potato"". First man who love potato say ""no you have all potato, I love potato too much to see cut in two."" Judge hear what man say and know it must be his potato, so he tells second man he can have no potato and first man can have all potato. First man leave with potato and for first time know what happy feel. Goes home to enjoy potato but finds potato is rotten on inside. He hold potato and tell potato he love it but it is too old. Potato die and man die and there is nothing left but sad.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1b1o32,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1b1o32/men_fight_over_potato/,
1376259810.0,173,self.LatvianJokes,1k62og,Golden potato,197,24,11,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1k62og/golden_potato/,"One day man while man is tend farm he see single golden potato in field. Man never see potato before so he surprise. He pick up potato to bring to home, think make food so wife and child not die of malnourish, but when he touch potato turn into cloud of smoke and appear genie.
Genie tells man: ""I give one wish anything. What you wish for.""
Man says: ""I wish have many potato, many vodka and make daughter and wife safe of politburo.""
Genie tell man: ""I give your wish but first ask: there is no daughter. Why you ask daughter unrape?""
Man says: ""Daughter hidden to cupboard since age 4. Is for not Secret Polise rape.""
But Genie Politburo disguise. Politburo take off disguise, find daughter and rape. Then bring man to Gulag for rest miserable existance. Wife die of malnourish. Man is stupid for think genie exist.",,False,,t5_2uzp8,False,,,True,t3_1k62og,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1k62og/golden_potato/,
1368918899.0,174,self.LatvianJokes,1elod7,Latvia Nursery Rhymes,204,30,16,http://www.reddit.com/r/LatvianJokes/comments/1elod7/latvia_nursery_rhymes/,"**Latvian Famous Nosorry Rhymes**
The soldier marching one by one, hurrah, hurrah
The soldier marching one by one, hurrah, hurrah
The soldier marching one by one,
The little one stops to plead to be done
And they all eat little one after shoot with gun
-----------------------------------
All our bridges falling down, falling down, falling down
All our bridges falling down, I rape lady
-----------------------------------