JohnathanIrvin.com commits seppuku. Now an Isekai, the website is reborn.
-Nearly two forsaken years have passed since JohnathanIrvin.com received enhancements. The stagnant beast lacked honor. The creature of horror ignored the security bells. It cared not to provide value. Death was the only way to ensure reincarnation.
-Thrust forth the crisis of covid has sprung the need for software engineers. Elite hackers must rise to defeat the cybersecurity crisis. An onslaught of recruiter messages bombarded Johnathan's LinkedIn. The site knew the stakes were high. Little did we know how desperate the industry was for talented engineers.
-With a harness of experience, we set out to change the status quo.
-Table Of Contents
-Beautification Warning
-Blessed not with visual creativity, the engineer was not a designer. He was an engineer.
-The engineer had heard, "Your design skills are laughable."
-The engineer replied, "I'm not a designer. I'm an engineer."
-"I want my website to be beautiful."
-The engineer laughed, "I use frameworks like Bootstrap and Materialize."
-Minimalist sycophants beware the following:
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- Bootstrap -
- Materialize -
- Bulma -
- Vuetify -
- Flutter -
- Vanilla JS 🤔 -
Bravado Justification
-The readers stakeholders needed justification for the engineer's bravado.
The engineer summoned a value proposition to justify the coming adventure.
-He championed three areas of value.
- -Dumpster Fire (Security)
-Security issues plagued the repository.
-Dependabot alerted the engineer daily.
-The engineer provided the hackers stakeholders with a truncated warrant list.
| CVE | -Severity | -Description | -
|---|---|---|
| CVE-2021-3803 | -7.5 High | -Inefficient Regular Expression Complexity | -
| CVE-2021-23341 | -7.5 High | -Regular Expression Denial of Service (ReDoSI) | -
| CVE-2022-0355 | -7.5 High | -Exposure of Sensitive Information | -
| CVE-2020-7788 | -7.3 High | -Malicious INI file | -
The rabbit hole had only begun. An issue inside of Node.js led to the rise of these little devils popping up multiple times in different dependencies.
-The hydra needed to stop. The engineer had not the time to learn how to stop the beast in its JavaScript landscape. The engineering effort would be better suited to Python.
-The engineer emphasized protective measures benefits.
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- Avoid litigation. -
- Protect information. -
- Stabalize mental health. -
The engineer's security alert stress traumatized him with constant anxiety.
-Value Add (Content)
-The engineer navigated the lack-luster site map to identify hidden treasures. There were no treasures in these catacombs.
-The engineer had a single article -- Hello World.
-The wife stakeholders flogged the engineer for not producing content. An epic conflict ensued. Nearly fired, The engineer agreed to:
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- Document experiments. -
- Produce "regular" content. -
- Make lists. -
Stalking (Metrics)
-The Google Analytics spies were able to provide decent intelligence.
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- Number of visitors -
- Number of page views -
- Country of origin -
- Demographics -
- Behavior -
The engineer knew relying on Google Analytics required JavaScript and could be unreliable. A trained engineer demanded more.
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- Page Requests -
- A / B Tracking -
- Page Load Time -
- Users w/o JavaScript -
- Suspicious Behavior -
- Rate Limiting -
- Errors -
The engineer wanted to track unexpected behavior. The engineer needed to use the scientific method to deliver valuable features to the clients stakeholders.
New features take time to implement. The engineer would deliver more in the coming sprints.
-Heroic Engineering
-The engineer has been in the industry for over a decade. If stakeholders identify feature loss, they will fire the engineer.
-The stakeholders need assurances of the engineer's heroics.
-The engineer created a list of functionality to keep the stakeholders out of his man cave.
-| Feature | -Description | -
|---|---|
| Favicon | -Browser/bookmark image. | -
| Navigation | -Page links. | -
| Social Media | -Contact links. | -
| Footer | -Page's bottom. 😂 | -
| RSS Feed | -Article subscription. | -
| Site Map | -Treasure trove. 🤦 | -
| Analytics | -Usage statistics. | -
| Blog | -Article list. ⬇️ | -
| Article | -Semi-cohesive thoughts. | -
The engineer composed a fancy email to management stakeholders.
Hello Mr. Fancy Manager,
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