b_000_cah.json

{
    "name": "Cards Against Humanity",
    "description": "The updated version of the Cards Against Humanity base game.",
    "watermark": "",
    "expansion": false,
    "blackCards": [
        {
            "text": "Why can't I sleep at night?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What's that smell?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What's that sound?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What ended my last relationship?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What is Batman's guilty pleasure?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What's a girl's best friend?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What does Dick Cheney prefer?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What's the most emo?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What are my parents hiding from me?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What will always get you laid?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What did I bring back from Mexico?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What will I bring back in time to convince people that I am a powerful wizard?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "How am I maintaining my relationship status?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What gives me uncontrollable gas?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What do old people smell like? ",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What's my secret power?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What's there a ton of in heaven?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What would grandma find disturbing, yet oddly charming?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What did the U.S. airdrop to the children of Afghanistan?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What helps Obama unwind?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What did Vin Diesel eat for dinner?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Why am I sticky?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What gets better with age?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What's Teach for America using to inspire inner city students to succeed?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Why do I hurt all over?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What am I giving up for Lent?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What's my anti-drug?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What never fails to liven up the party?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What's the new fad diet?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "I got 99 problems but ____ ain't one.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "TSA guidelines now prohibit ____ on airplanes.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "MTV's new reality show features eight washed-up celebrities living with ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "I drink to forget ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "I'm sorry, Professor, but I couldn't complete my homework because of ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Alternative medicine is now embracing the curative powers of ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "It's a pity that kids these days are all getting involved with ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "____. That's how I want to die.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "In the new Disney Channel Original Movie, Hannah Montana struggles with ____ for the first time.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Instead of coal, Santa now gives the bad children ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "A romantic, candlelit dinner would be incomplete without ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Next from J.K. Rowling: Harry Potter and the Chamber of ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "____. Betcha can't have just one!",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "White people like ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "____. High five, bro.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "During sex, I like to think about ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "BILLY MAYS HERE FOR ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "When I am the President of the United States, I will create the Department of ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Major League Baseball has banned ____ for giving players an unfair advantage.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "When I am a billionare, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "____. It's a trap!",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Coming to Broadway this season, ____: The Musical.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "When Pharaoh remained unmoved, Moses called down a plague of ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "The class field trip was completely ruined by ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "In Michael Jackson's final moments, he thought about ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Studies show that lab rats navigate mazes 50% faster after being exposed to ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "I do not know with which weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "____: Good to the last drop.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "____: kid-tested, mother-approved.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "And the Academy Award for ____ goes to ____.",
            "pick": 2
        },
        {
            "text": "For my next trick, I will pull ____ out of ____.",
            "pick": 2
        },
        {
            "text": "____ is a slippery slope that leads to ____.",
            "pick": 2
        },
        {
            "text": "In M. Night Shyamalan's new movie, Bruce Willis discovers that ____ had really been ____ all along.",
            "pick": 2
        },
        {
            "text": "In a world ravaged by ____, our only solace is ____.",
            "pick": 2
        },
        {
            "text": "I never truly understood ____ until I encountered ____.",
            "pick": 2
        },
        {
            "text": "When I was tripping on acid, ____ turned into ____.",
            "pick": 2
        },
        {
            "text": "That's right, I killed ____. How, you ask? ____.",
            "pick": 2
        },
        {
            "text": "____ + ____ = ____.",
            "pick": 3
        },
        {
            "text": "What's the next superhero/sidekick duo?",
            "pick": 2
        },
        {
            "text": "Daddy, why is Mommy crying?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "In L.A. County Jail, word is you can trade 200 cigarettes for ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "After the earthquake, Sean Penn brought ____ to the people of Haiti.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Next on ESPN2, the World Series of ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Step 1: ____. Step 2: ____. Step 3: Profit.",
            "pick": 2
        },
        {
            "text": "Life for American Indians was forever changed when the White Man introduced them to ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What's the next Happy Meal® toy?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Lifetime® presents ____, the story of ____.",
            "pick": 2
        },
        {
            "text": "Dear Abby,<br><br>I'm having some trouble with ____ and would like your advice.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "While the United States raced the Soviet Union to the moon, the Mexican government funneled millions of pesos into research on ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "How did I lose my virginity?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Here is the church<br>Here is the steeple<br>Open the doors<br>And there is ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "During his childhood, Salvador Dal&iacute; produced hundreds of paintings of ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "This is the way the world ends / This is the way the world ends / Not with a bang but with ____.",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "In 1,000 years, when paper money is a distant memory, how will we pay for goods and services?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "War!<br><br>What is it good for?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "What don't you want to find in your Kung Pao chicken?",
            "pick": 1
        },
        {
            "text": "Rumor has it that Vladimir Putin's favorite delicacy is ____ stuffed with ____.",
            "pick": 2
        },
        {
            "text": "The Smithsonian Museum of Natural History has just opened an exhibit on ____.",
            "pick": 1
        }
    ],
    "whiteCards": [
        "Michelle Obama's arms.",
        "White people.",
        "An erection that lasts longer than four hours.",
        "Panda sex.",
        "A middle-aged man on roller skates.",
        "Coat hanger abortions.",
        "Scrubbing under the folds.",
        "Wearing underwear inside-out to avoid doing laundry.",
        "MechaHitler.",
        "Getting naked and watching Nickelodeon.",
        "Morgan Freeman's voice.",
        "Breaking out into song and dance.",
        "Soup that is too hot.",
        "Unfathomable stupidity.",
        "Horrifying laser hair removal accidents.",
        "Boogers.",
        "Expecting a burp and vomiting on the floor.",
        "A defective condom.",
        "Teenage pregnancy.",
        "Hot cheese.",
        "A mopey zoo lion.",
        "Shapeshifters.",
        "The Care Bear Stare.",
        "Erectile dysfunction.",
        "The chronic.",
        "Firing a rifle into the air while balls deep in a squealing hog.",
        "Nicolas Cage.",
        "Dropping a chandelier on your enemies and riding the rope up.",
        "Public ridicule.",
        "A snapping turtle biting the tip of your penis.",
        "Vehicular manslaughter.",
        "The token minority.",
        "A gentle caress of the inner thigh.",
        "Poor life choices.",
        "Embryonic stem cells.",
        "The Little Engine That Could.",
        "Lady Gaga.",
        "A death ray.",
        "Vigilante justice.",
        "Exactly what you'd expect.",
        "Natural male enhancement.",
        "Passive-aggressive Post-it notes.",
        "Inappropriate yodeling.",
        "A homoerotic volleyball montage.",
        "Actually taking candy from a baby.",
        "Crystal meth.",
        "My inner demons.",
        "Pac-Man uncontrollably guzzling cum.",
        "My vagina.",
        "The true meaning of Christmas.",
        "Flying sex snakes.",
        "German dungeon porn.",
        "Praying the gay away.",
        "Dying.",
        "Same-sex ice dancing.",
        "Dying of dysentery.",
        "Roofies.",
        "The Big Bang.",
        "Amputees.",
        "Men.",
        "Concealing a boner.",
        "Agriculture.",
        "Making a pouty face.",
        "YOU MUST CONSTRUCT ADDITIONAL PYLONS.",
        "Hormone injections.",
        "Tom Cruise.",
        "Object permanence.",
        "Being marginalized.",
        "The profoundly handicapped.",
        "Nickelback.",
        "Doing the right thing.",
        "The invisible hand.",
        "Heteronormativity.",
        "Cuddling.",
        "Raptor attacks.",
        "Fear itself.",
        "Sniffing glue.",
        "An icepick lobotomy.",
        "Being rich.",
        "The clitoris.",
        "Sexy pillow fights.",
        "Michael Jackson.",
        "Sexting.",
        "Horse meat.",
        "Sunshine and rainbows.",
        "Goblins.",
        "Spectacular abs.",
        "The Three-Fifths compromise.",
        "Vigorous jazz hands.",
        "Skeletor.",
        "Vikings.",
        "Genital piercings.",
        "A really cool hat.",
        "An Oedipus complex.",
        "The Underground Railroad.",
        "Heartwarming orphans.",
        "Cheating in the Special Olympics.",
        "Sharing needles.",
        "Ethnic cleansing.",
        "Eating all of the cookies before the AIDS bake-sale.",
        "My humps.",
        "The violation of our most basic human rights.",
        "Fingering.",
        "The placenta.",
        "Flightless birds.",
        "Stranger danger.",
        "Sean Penn.",
        "A sad handjob.",
        "Self-loathing.",
        "A falcon with a cap on its head.",
        "Historically black colleges.",
        "Aaron Burr.",
        "Former President George W. Bush.",
        "Geese.",
        "Mutually-assured destruction.",
        "Bling.",
        "Smegma.",
        "The South.",
        "Pretending to care.",
        "Arnold Schwarzenegger.",
        "A sausage festival.",
        "Foreskin.",
        "Being a dick to children.",
        "Chainsaws for hands.",
        "The Pope.",
        "A balanced breakfast.",
        "Elderly Japanese men.",
        "Pictures of boobs.",
        "Science.",
        "A bleached asshole.",
        "Autocannibalism.",
        "William Shatner.",
        "A micropenis.",
        "Bingeing and purging.",
        "Man meat.",
        "Laying an egg.",
        "The terrorists.",
        "A bitch slap.",
        "One trillion dollars.",
        "Chunks of dead prostitute.",
        "The entire Mormon Tabernacle Choir.",
        "The female orgasm.",
        "Extremely tight pants.",
        "Stormtroopers.",
        "The Boy Scouts of America.",
        "Throwing a virgin into a volcano.",
        "Passive-agression.",
        "Guys who don't call.",
        "AIDS.",
        "The Rapture.",
        "Eugenics.",
        "Taking off your shirt.",
        "Ronald Reagan.",
        "Jewish fraternities.",
        "All-you-can-eat shrimp for $4.99.",
        "Scalping.",
        "Edible underpants.",
        "Figgy pudding.",
        "The American Dream.",
        "Testicular torsion.",
        "The folly of man.",
        "The KKK.",
        "The taint; the grundle; the fleshy fun-bridge.",
        "Saxophone solos.",
        "That thing that electrocutes your abs.",
        "Friends with benefits.",
        "Teaching a robot to love.",
        "Me time.",
        "The heart of a child.",
        "Smallpox blankets.",
        "Yeast.",
        "Full frontal nudity.",
        "Authentic Mexican cuisine.",
        "Licking things to claim them as your own.",
        "Genghis Khan.",
        "The hardworking Mexican.",
        "RoboCop.",
        "Spontaneous human combustion.",
        "Natural selection.",
        "A good sniff.",
        "Nipple blades.",
        "Leaving an awkward voicemail.",
        "Assless chaps.",
        "Sweet, sweet vengeance.",
        "Darth Vader.",
        "Necrophilia.",
        "Toni Morrison's vagina.",
        "Preteens.",
        "A cooler full of organs.",
        "Keanu Reeves.",
        "A thermonuclear detonation.",
        "Catapults.",
        "Emotions.",
        "Balls.",
        "Homeless people.",
        "Old-people smell.",
        "Farting and walking away.",
        "The inevitable heat death of the universe.",
        "The Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.",
        "Sperm whales.",
        "A murder most foul.",
        "Daddy issues.",
        "Britney Spears at 55.",
        "Natalie Portman.",
        "The Holy Bible.",
        "Pulling out.",
        "Pixelated bukkake.",
        "Waiting 'til marriage.",
        "The World of Warcraft.",
        "World peace.",
        "A can of whoop-ass.",
        "A zesty breakfast burrito.",
        "Picking up girls at the abortion clinic.",
        "Land mines.",
        "A time travel paradox.",
        "Seppuku.",
        "Waking up half-naked in a Denny's parking lot.",
        "Christopher Walken.",
        "Gloryholes.",
        "A tiny horse.",
        "A sassy black woman.",
        "Penis envy.",
        "Drinking alone.",
        "Hulk Hogan.",
        "Whipping it out.",
        "Dental dams.",
        "Gandhi.",
        "God.",
        "Friction.",
        "A sea of troubles.",
        "Poor people.",
        "Flesh-eating bacteria.",
        "Dick Cheney.",
        "Lockjaw.",
        "Take-backsies.",
        "Opposable thumbs.",
        "The homosexual agenda.",
        "Fiery poops.",
        "Cards Against Humanity.",
        "Sean Connery.",
        "The milk man.",
        "The Chinese gymnastics team.",
        "Eating the last known bison.",
        "Giving 110%.",
        "Friendly fire.",
        "Count Chocula.",
        "Feeding Rosie O'Donnell.",
        "Being a motherfucking sorcerer.",
        "African children.",
        "Crippling debt.",
        "A disappointing birthday party.",
        "Puppies!",
        "A windmill full of corpses.",
        "Being on fire.",
        "A lifetime of sadness.",
        "Republicans.",
        "A salty surprise.",
        "The Jews.",
        "Incest.",
        "Nazis.",
        "Repression.",
        "Attitude.",
        "Passable transvestites.",
        "Puberty.",
        "Swooping.",
        "Lactation.",
        "Pabst Blue Ribbon.",
        "The gays.",
        "A foul mouth.",
        "A hot mess.",
        "My collection of high-tech sex toys.",
        "Bees?",
        "Getting drunk on mouthwash.",
        "The glass ceiling.",
        "Sarah Palin.",
        "Frolicking.",
        "Not giving a shit about the Third World.",
        "My relationship status.",
        "Barack Obama.",
        "Mouth herpes.",
        "Wiping her butt.",
        "Pedophiles.",
        "Doin' it in the butt.",
        "Being fabulous.",
        "An M. Night Shyamalan plot twist.",
        "A bag of magic beans.",
        "Dead parents.",
        "My sex life.",
        "Riding off into the sunset.",
        "Dick fingers.",
        "The Virginia Tech Massacre.",
        "Queefing.",
        "Tangled Slinkys.",
        "Civilian casualties.",
        "Leprosy.",
        "Grave robbing.",
        "Tentacle porn.",
        "Bill Nye the Science Guy.",
        "New Age music.",
        "72 virgins.",
        "Hope.",
        "Passing a kidney stone.",
        "A mime having a stroke.",
        "Classist undertones.",
        "A mating display.",
        "The Kool-Aid Man.",
        "Not reciprocating oral sex.",
        "Italians.",
        "My soul.",
        "A stray pube.",
        "Jerking off into a pool of children's tears.",
        "Getting really high.",
        "Overcompensation.",
        "Free samples.",
        "Shaquille O'Neal's acting career.",
        "Half-assed foreplay.",
        "Explosions.",
        "White privilege.",
        "Road head.",
        "Poorly-timed Holocaust jokes.",
        "8 oz. of sweet Mexican black-tar heroin.",
        "Judge Judy.",
        "Altar boys.",
        "Scientology.",
        "Justin Bieber.",
        "Alcoholism.",
        "My genitals.",
        "Winking at old people.",
        "Golden showers.",
        "Racism.",
        "Auschwitz.",
        "Kids with ass cancer.",
        "Hurricane Katrina.",
        "Lumberjack fantasies.",
        "An asymmetric boob job.",
        "Asians who aren't good at math.",
        "The Blood of Christ.",
        "A brain tumor.",
        "Prancing.",
        "The Hamburglar.",
        "Police brutality.",
        "Estrogen.",
        "A robust mongoloid.",
        "Pooping back and forth. Forever.",
        "Bitches.",
        "Stephen Hawking talking dirty.",
        "Getting so angry that you pop a boner.",
        "Tasteful sideboob.",
        "Two midgets shitting into a bucket.",
        "Racially-biased SAT questions.",
        "Anal beads.",
        "Surprise sex!",
        "Dead babies.",
        "Masturbation.",
        "The Hustle.",
        "Obesity.",
        "Child beauty pageants.",
        "Kamikaze pilots.",
        "Powerful thighs.",
        "Women's suffrage.",
        "John Wilkes Booth.",
        "Parting the Red Sea.",
        "Harry Potter erotica.",
        "Grandma.",
        "Porn stars.",
        "A monkey smoking a cigar.",
        "Lance Armstrong's missing testicle.",
        "Children on leashes.",
        "Multiple stab wounds.",
        "Oompa-Loompas.",
        "Peeing a little bit.",
        "The miracle of childbirth.",
        "Another goddamn vampire movie.",
        "Active listening.",
        "A gassy antelope.",
        "BATMAN!!!",
        "Black people.",
        "Serfdom.",
        "The Trail of Tears.",
        "Ghosts.",
        "The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy.",
        "Finger painting.",
        "Robert Downey, Jr.",
        "Muhammed (Praise Be Unto Him).",
        "Famine.",
        "AXE Body Spray.",
        "The Force.",
        "Cybernetic enhancements.",
        "Mr. Clean, right behind you.",
        "Third base.",
        "A fetus.",
        "Women in yogurt commercials.",
        "Copping a feel.",
        "Sexual tension.",
        "Dry heaving.",
        "Centaurs.",
        "Wifely duties.",
        "Hot people.",
        "Kanye West.",
        "The Amish.",
        "When you fart and a little bit comes out.",
        "Viagra&reg;.",
        "Five-Dollar Footlongs&trade;.",
        "The Tempur-Pedic&reg; Swedish Sleep System&trade;.",
        "Fancy Feast&reg;.",
        "Hot Pockets&reg;.",
        "Domino's&trade; Oreo&trade; Dessert Pizza.",
        "The &Uuml;bermensch.",
        "Adderall&trade;.",
        "GoGurt&reg;.",
        "A Super Soaker&trade; full of cat pee.",
        "Lunchables&trade;.",
        "The Make-A-Wish&reg; Foundation.",
        "A Bop It&trade;.",
        "Home video of Oprah sobbing into a Lean Cuisine&reg;.",
        "Switching to Geico&reg;.",
        "Advice from a wise, old black man.",
        "The Devil himself.",
        "The art of seduction.",
        "Funky fresh rhymes.",
        "The light of a billion suns.",
        "Destroying the evidence.",
        "Silence.",
        "Growing a pair.",
        "Synergistic management solutions.",
        "Wet dreams.",
        "A live studio audience.",
        "The Great Depression.",
        "An M16 assault rifle.",
        "Poopy diapers.",
        "Tickling Sean Hannity, even after he tells you to stop.",
        "Stalin.",
        "A spastic nerd.",
        "Rush Limbaugh's soft, shitty body.",
        "Capturing Newt Gingrich and forcing him to dance in a monkey suit.",
        "Battlefield amputations.",
        "Brown people.",
        "Rehab.",
        "An ugly face.",
        "Menstrual rage.",
        "An uppercut.",
        "Shiny objects.",
        "50,000 volts straight to the nipples.",
        "A bucket of fish heads.",
        "Hospice care.",
        "Being fat and stupid.",
        "Getting married, having a few kids, buying some stuff, retiring to Florida, and dying.",
        "A pyramid of severed heads.",
        "Crucifixion.",
        "A subscription to Men's Fitness.",
        "Some god-damn peace and quiet.",
        "A micropig wearing a tiny raincoat and booties.",
        "Used panties.",
        "The penny whistle solo from \"My Heart Will Go On.\"",
        "A tribe of warrior women.",
        "An oversized lollipop.",
        "Helplessly giggling at the mention of Hutus and Tutsis.",
        "Not wearing pants.",
        "Consensual sex.",
        "Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II."
    ]
}