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Pam: Well. I don't know.
Pam: What?
Pam: Uh, yeah. Just a fax.
Pam: You haven't told me.
Pam: Uh, yeah, the one...
Pam: You put in the garbage can that was a special filing cabinet.
Pam: I have an important question for you.
Pam: Are you going to Angela's cat party on Sunday?
Pam: This is Mr. Scott.
Pam: I don't think it would be the worst thing if they let me go because then I might... I don't think it's many little girls' dream to be a receptionist. I like to do illustrations. Um... Mostly watercolor. A few oil pencil. Um, Jim thinks they're good.
Pam: Dunder Mifflin. This is Pam.
Pam: You just still have these messages from yesterday.
Pam: What?
Pam: Don't we all?
Pam: Nothing.
Pam: I was in the meeting with Jan and she did say that it could be this branch that gets the axe.
Pam: Jim said mixed berries? Well, yeah, he's on to me. Um... [Laughs]
Pam: [Laughing]
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: So when are we going out?
Pam: OK. Yeah.
Pam: Hey.
Pam: Roy's my fiance. We've been engaged about three years. We were supposed to get married in September but I think we're gonna get married in the spring.
Pam: Do you mind if I go out for a drink with these guys?
Pam: OK. I'm gonna be a few minutes. So it's only twenty past five. I still have to do my faxes.
Pam: You got a fax.
Pam: What? Why?
Pam: Stealing? What am I supposed to have stolen?
Pam: Post-it Notes? What are those worth, 50 cents?
Pam: Are you serious?
Pam: I can't believe this. I mean I have never even stolen as much as a paperclip and you're firing me.
Pam: You're a jerk.
Pam: Hey.
Pam: Good. I thought you were going out for a drink with...
Pam: It's better, thanks.
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: Is...?
Pam: Um... Are you...
Pam: Yes.
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: Yeah. Listen, have a nice weekend.
Pam: I guess.
Pam: What?
Pam: Wired.
Pam: Oh, yeah.
Pam: Smoked turkey.
Pam: Yeah, Freecell.
Pam: I know. I saw that.
Pam: I'm saving that 'cause I like it when the cards go T-ts-ts-tch-tch-tch.
Pam: Um, hi. How are you?
Pam: Great.
Pam: Thank you.
Pam: That's nice, Dwight.
Pam: OK, I like your food.
Pam: OK. If I have to do this, based on stereotypes that are totally untrue, that I do not agree with, you would maybe not be a very good driver.
Pam: [stirs] Mmmm.
Pam: Oh.
Pam: Sorry.
Pam: Um, that spells incest.
Pam: It would've been just as easy for him to spell insect. Of course, that wouldn't have made any sense either.
Pam: Yeah, um, there's good things about Michael. He uh, uh... Yeah, definitely. Um...
Pam: Seventy-six percent. What's yours?
Pam: You're doing fine.
Pam: People treat us like the race on our forehead. And then we guess what race we are.
Pam: No.
Pam: No.
Pam: No.
Pam: No.
Pam: No.
Pam: It didn't have anything to do with race.
Pam: One time we had an ethnic festival in Scranton. One time.
Pam: What card was she?
Pam: I'm not making any copies.
Pam: Nothing new.
Pam: There's nothing new.
Pam: Oh, do you want me to repeat the messages that I gave you before for the... [nods toward camera]
Pam: No. I have a life.
Pam: You should try it sometime.
Pam: [laughs]... your problem.
Pam: Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.
Pam: Where are you?
Pam: Actually, people are really unhappy. Um, Dwight sent around this memo and people are freaking out 'cause the...
Pam: No you're not.
Pam: OK.
Pam: Still no one calling.
Pam: Dwight, what...
Pam: OK. Dwight. Are you really in charge of picking the health care plan?
Pam: This is a ridiculously awful plan. Because you cut everything.
Pam: Why would you want to raise your cholesterol?
Pam: Dwight's health care memo. I told you about it.
Pam: Michael, he made huge cuts.
Pam: Where are you going?
Pam: I'm inventing new diseases.
Pam: So, let's say my teeth turn to liquid and then, they drip down the back of my throat. What would you call that?
Pam: Nice.
Pam: It's an epidemic.
Pam: [on phone] Hey, Jim. It's Pam.
Pam: Good, how are you? Busy?
Pam: Um, I'm not bothering you, am I?
Pam: You don't have anything you're doing?
Pam: Oh great. Um, no, this weekend? Nothing. I'm not really doing anything.
Pam: I might go to the mall.
Pam: I need new shoes.
Pam: Why did you put Dwight in charge of that? He did a horrible job.
Pam: We stole Dwight's trashcan and she found some of his early attempts at his sign.
Pam: Mmm hmm.
Pam: Mmm hmm.
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: You promise these are confidential?
Pam: Did you just mark on that?
Pam: You made a "P."
Pam: In case I get sick.
Pam: Because we're not married.
Pam: We haven't set a date. [Dwight laughs]
Pam: Shut up, Dwight.
Pam: I'm not talking to you anymore.
Pam: Um... Actually, we don't have any staff birthdays coming up.
Pam: Oh.
Pam: Okay, umm... that would be Meredith.
Pam: But it's not until next month.
Pam: You still want to have a party?
Pam: How about green?
Pam: This was tough. I suggested we flip a coin. But Angela said she doesn't like to gamble. Of course by saying that she was gambling that I wouldn't smack her.
Pam: It is... her birthday.
Pam: An alliance?
Pam: What does that even mean?
Pam: [whispering] Hey, Jim, can I talk to you for a second?
Pam: Um, I don't know, I'm just like, I'm going a little crazy 'cause I keep overhearing all these conversations between Michael and corporate about like, staff issues?
Pam: Yeah, he's making me take notes on these meetings and I'm, like, "These people are my friends." But he's all like, "This is confidential. You can't tell anybody." But I just feel like I want to... aaah. Just promise me you're not gonna say anything.
Pam: OK, yeah.
Pam: He's in a box?
Pam: [on her cell phone] Hey where are you? Yeah, we were supposed to meet here. What? Oh my gosh! That ties in perfectly with something that Michael was telling me earlier! I just don't know what some of the people in, like, accounting are going to do? It said specifically that...
Pam: Happy Birthday. [gives Meredith her card]
Pam: Oh, tell me, tell me.
Pam: [laughing] That's perfect!
Pam: Hey, Hey!
Pam: Come on.
Pam: It's just office pranks.
Pam: [telephone rings] Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam. Hold please.
Pam: I wasn't really going for anything.
Pam: Are you being serious?
Pam: Okay.
Pam: No one's calling.
Pam: Sometimes there's a lot of time between the calls.
Pam: Okay.
Pam: Okay.
Pam: Yes.
Pam: No.
Pam: Yeah, I could tell.
Pam: That was a good example.
Pam: Okay. [telephone rings]
Pam: [smiling] Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam. One moment I'll transfer you.
Pam: [whispering] I'm so sorry. [Angela, Phyllis, and Pam all whispering] ... seriously, we're just...
Pam: My fiance has plans for us this Saturday. So I really hope that Dwight doesn't make me work. Maybe I should sleep with him? I'm kidding, kidding. Totally kidding.
Pam: [on the phone] No, no, I know that the warranty's expired, but isn't it supposed to last longer than two years if it isn't defective? OK, fine, three years.
Pam: Please don't throw garbage at me.
Pam: I don't think so Michael. Besides, I can't cheer against my fiance.
Pam: Maybe Angela would cheerlead.
Pam: Yeah, I'm just forwarding the phones.
Pam: Yeah, you're gonna need it.
Pam: [laughing] I'm just saying, Roy is very competitive.
Pam: And he wants to take the WaveRunners to the lake this Saturday so...
Pam: Um, I think I'm gonna be up at the lake.
Pam: Woo!
Pam: Mmm-hmm.
Pam: Hey.
Pam: Yeah, he's, uh, pretty good, huh? [to Roy] Let's get you into a tub.
Pam: New pants?
Pam: Abercrombie & Fitch?
Pam: Well, I though we were saving money for the wedding, but apparently Roy thought it was more important to buy two WaveRunners. I don't really ever get to use the other WaveRunner that's supposed to be mine because his brother uses it and they race.
Pam: Uh, Michael?
Pam: Hey, there's a...
Pam: There's a person here...
Pam: There's...
Pam: There's a person here who wants to sell handbags.
Pam: Okay, I told her you'd talk to her.
Pam: Okay.
Pam: There's an HR meeting in there at 11:30.
Pam: No.
Pam: That's a very rude thing to say, Kevin.
Pam: It's nice having Katy around. It's another person for Michael to um, interact with.
Pam: We're not dating, we're engaged.
Pam: [smiles]
Pam: [mimicing Katy] Oh definitely, definitely step in and out of it like that.
Pam: Oh!
Pam: Oh...
Pam: Oh, God. It's sad. It's so sad.
Pam: [smiles in agreement]
Pam: You're horrible.
Pam: Yeah, what's that?
Pam: I'm engaged. So...
Pam: I wished, right?
Pam: Yeah, I gave it to you.
Pam: So, can I..? [points to the door]
Pam: [nods]
Pam: That's what he said.
Pam: [not looking at Roy] Hi.
Pam: Roy...
Pam: Cut it out.
Pam: Stop it. [laughing]
Pam: [giggling] Cut it out.
Pam: Stop. [giggling]
Pam: [breathless] Stop, I can't breathe.
Pam: Jim is a great guy. He's like a brother to me. We're like best friends in the office and I really hope he finds someone.
Pam: I'm bored.
Pam: No, I'm kidding. Um, so you got big plans this weekend?
Pam: Really?
Pam: What are you guys going to do?
Pam: That's great.
Pam: That's cool.
Pam: I, I was gonna say, I think that um, we're gonna help Roy's cousin move.
Pam: 'Cause Roy's got a truck.
Pam: Uh, huh. Yes.
Pam: Great.
Pam: Okay, I'm gonna head back.
Pam: You know Michael's been talking to her too.
Pam: What do you think his chances are?
Pam: [laughs] I like that song.
Pam: [laughs] 10 years ago.
Pam: Ugh...
Pam: You know what they say about a car wreck, where it's so awful you can't look away? The Dundies are like a car wreck that you want to look away, but you have to stare at it because your boss is making you.
Pam: Michael has taped every Dundies awards and now, he's making me look through hours of footage to find highlights.
Pam: Oh, yeah, this is the part where Kevin sat in front of the camcorder all night. It's great.
Pam: [quietly laughing] It wasn't. I swear.
Pam: We're not laughing at you, Dwight.
Pam: Um, just something somebody wrote.
Pam: Um, it's kind of private.
Pam: Okay, now I'm laughing at you.
Pam: You're taking away our bathroom?
Pam: Michael...
Pam: ...Dwight is banning us from our bathroom.
Pam: Um...
Pam: Sorry.
Pam: ...because that's what happens every time!
Pam: No.
Pam: [Breaks Roy's grip] No, I don't want to go, I don't want to.
Pam: If you would have asked me that, then you would know.
Pam: Oh no, I just, I decided to stay.
Pam: I'll just get a ride home from Angela.
Pam: Oh good, I'm just in time for Ping.
Pam: [to an off camera waiter and still clutching Jim's beer] Can I get a drink?
Pam: No, no. 'Cause the ice melts and then it's like second drink! [laughs]
Pam: Yay Kevin. Whoo hoo for Kevin! For stinking up the bathroom.
Pam: Woo! Hey, I haven't gotten one yet!
Pam: More Dundies!
Pam: Fine work! Fine work Stanley!
Pam: Here here! Speech, speech, speech, speech [other people start joining in]
Pam: I have so many people to thank for this award.
Pam: Okay, first off, my Keds. Because I couldn't have done it without them. [people clap] Thank you. Let's give Michael a round of applause for MC-ing tonight because [people start clapping again] this is a lot harder than it looks. And also because of Dwight too.
Pam: Um, so, finally, I want to thank God. Because God gave me this Dundie.
Pam: And, I feel God in this Chili's tonight. WHOOOOOOOO!!!!
Pam: Nothing.
Pam: What?
Pam: Dwight, get off me!
Pam: Oh my God!
Pam: I just want to say, that this was the best, Dundies, ever! WHOOOOOOOOO!!!
Pam: I feel bad about what I wrote on the bathroom wall.
Pam: Hey, um, can I ask you a question?
Pam: Um, I just wanted to say thanks.
Pam: Bye.
Pam: I am fine.
Pam: Okay.
Pam: [laughing] I am fine.
Pam: Oh, my God.
Pam: Dwight, let me up.
Pam: I'm fine.
Pam: You're holding up three fingers.
Pam: You do realize that we can't serve liquor at the party.
Pam: I think the tree looks nice.
Pam: [opens up her present] Oh, my god! Thank you very much, Santa, whoever you are. It's awesome.
Pam: Yeah, we call it White Elephant.
Pam: I'll take the iPod.
Pam: I want the iPod.
Pam: Well, I mean, it's an iPod. But ..
Pam: Sorry, I ..
Pam: Maybe because you hated her present so much.
Pam: How much?
Pam: I know. It's totally going to change the way I work out.
Pam: So what are you going to get me instead?
Pam: [laughs] No, I was just checking out my present. [holds up teapot]
Pam: I traded with Dwight. Just, I figured, you know, you went to a lot of trouble and it means a lot. And also, Roy got me an iPod or was going to get me an iPod, so ..
Pam: [opens teapot] Oh my god! The yearbook picture!
Pam: Yeah, I think I made the right choice.
Pam: Oh, my God! It's incredible. [Jim reaches and steals his card back before she can notice it] Is this the Boggle timer?
Pam: Do you want me to help you with that?
Pam: Yes.
Pam: Are you kidding?
Pam: Just let us open up the presents, Dwight.
Pam: It was supposed to be for Meredith, 'cause she said she likes my drawings.
Pam: Sorry. What do I want? What do I want... Oh, it's a pencil cup.
Pam: Um, I don't think so, I just bought it.
Pam: I love these.
Pam: Last week, Michael sent out this mysterious memo.
Pam: A ski mask and a swimsuit.
Pam: And brush our teeth.
Pam: How about the anchor?
Pam: I think you're thinking of The Hunt for Red October.
Pam: No, I'm not going to do that.
Pam: Hey, why don't we find like a quieter place to hang out?
Pam: It's getting kind of rowdy down there.
Pam: Sometimes I just don't get Roy.
Pam: I mean, I don't know. So... what's it like dating a cheerleader?
Pam: I'm cold.
Pam: Uh, I've been engaged for three years, and there's no end in sight. So... you don't wanna ask my advice.
Pam: No, no, I want my mom and dad to be there.
Pam: No, thank you.
Pam: How about the anchor?
Pam: You've been to the lake before?
Pam: Yes, you should have.
Pam: Love you.
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.
Pam: Michael, what's wrong?
Pam: Ok, wait wait wait wait...
Pam: Michael, do you need me to call an ambulance?!
Pam: Ok...
Pam: Wait a second, I thought you said that you were hurt.
Pam: [exasperated]
Pam: Uh, I have to stay here and answer the phone.
Pam: Michael, is, um, sick and he wants one of us to rescue him.
Pam: Michael, why don't you call your girlfriend?
Pam: What was that?! [everyone runs to Michael's office window]
Pam: Ohhhhhh!
Pam: Oh my gosh.
Jim and Pam: Oh my God!
Pam: Is he ok?
Pam: You missed two big conference calls today, one with corporate.
Pam: No, I didn't mention that you cooked your foot.
Pam: You didn't have any.
Pam: And do my job?
Pam: It's just that before, you said that you didn't want any special treatment.
Pam: Do you want some aspirin, because you seem a little fussy.
Pam: You've seen one of these?
Pam: Roy gave it to me for Christmas. I'm trying to figure out how to put songs on it.
Pam: Really?
Pam: Oh! Ha, haha.
Pam: Pan?
Pam: Oh, God.
Pam: [phone rings] What.
Pam: Tell me before I come there.
Pam: No.
Pam: No.
Pam: Really?
Pam: What?!
Pam: That is so cool. Thanks Dwight!
Pam: Oh God no, Dwight isn't my friend... Oh my God! Dwight's kind of my friend!
Pam: No, he's actually been really nice and helpful.
Pam: Wow...
Pam: Dwight, you have your hand up.
Pam: Dwight, here, let me help you Dwight.
Pam: Get up, get up.
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: I know.
Pam: I know.
Pam: I just want to say goodbye ok?
Pam: Yes, I know, but it's gonna be different.
Pam: It's just hard to explain.
Pam: Oh my goodness!
Pam: Come here.
Pam: Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.
Pam: Oh my God, what is going on, is Dwight ok?
Pam: I can't believe he's getting a CAT scan.
Pam: Really? Michael went in with him?
Pam: Wow.
Pam: Ok, that's uh, good news [Pam sees Angela eavesdropping] Uh, yeah, no I'll let you go.
Pam: Ok. Bye.
Pam: Hey, Oscar?
Pam: I just wanted to let you that Dwight's gonna be ok. The doctor said there's a really simple treatment for a concussion, so he'll probably even be back at work tomorrow.
Pam: I just, uh, thought you'd want to know that.
Pam: Oh, I can not believe I fell for that. [laughing] Oh, my God.
Pam: I bought my veil.
Pam: Ummm...
Pam: Ok. I was thinking about wearing it down. Kind of like, I don't know, like loose with big curls and...
Pam: That's a communal bowl.
Pam: Sick, like lots of sniffling. I don't know.
Pam: Umm. How many different ways are there to sniffle?
Pam: Ok, it was the second one.
Pam: Nuh-uh.
Pam: What did you guys talk about?
Pam: I hate you.
Pam: Hey.
Pam: Did you find anything good in your desk?
Pam: Score.
Pam: Big day.
Pam: Oh.
Pam: Right.
Pam: No, I know, like, I kind of like, I thought that maybe you did when I first started.
Pam: No, I mean, just 'cause we like got along so well.
Pam: So are you going to be like totally awkward around me now?
Pam: Mmm, hmm.
Pam: Cool.
Pam: Hey, here's your schedule for next week. Are you okay?
Pam: Oh, no, that's, you don't have to.
Pam: No, really, it's okay. I know that Jim had, like a crush on me when he first started. But that was a long time ago, so.
Pam: Jim had a crush on me on the booze cruise or he told you about it on the booze cruise?
Pam: Yep.
Pam: No thanks. You got a package.
Pam: Um, Pam plus Spam plus...?
Pam: Right.
Pam: It was great.
Pam: Mm-hm.
Pam: Roy and I just got back from the Poconos. I get ten vacation days a year, and I try to hold off taking them for as long as possible, and this year I got to the third week in January.
Pam: What?
Pam: I don't know.
Pam: [looking at pile on Michel's carpet] Oh... I don't know.
Pam: No, I don't think it's a bird.
Pam: Open the door up!
Pam: Thanks!
Pam: A little.
Pam: [giggles at Roy]
Pam: You're gonna throw my things on the ground?
Pam: [to Roy in Jim's earshot] ...back so soon.
Pam: Yeah, right.
Pam: Yeah, that's right. We could do a three-day weekend. I wonder if I could, like, call in sick on the Friday. Then I get a four-day weekend.
Pam: [to Roy as Jim escapes into bathroom] Are you kidding?
Pam: Somebody did something bad to Michael's carpet. Maybe that's all we need to know.
Pam: That doesn't seem fair.
Pam: What's our punishment?
Pam: [voicemail message for Jim] Hey, Jim. It's Pam. I keep looking up to say something to you and then Michael's there and it's horrible. Anyway, I'm bored. Come back!
Pam: [voicemail message for Jim] Hey, guess what? I moved my computer so I can't see Michael's head. It's working. I think I can have a career as a very specific type of decorator.
Pam: [voicemail message for Jim] Sudoku. Level moderate. 18 minutes. Suck on that, Halpert.
Pam: [voicemail message for Jim] I'll transfer you. Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam. Hold, please. Dunder Mifflin, this is ... okay, sorry. Michael was standing at my desk, and I needed to be busy or who knows what would've happened, so thank you.
Pam: [voicemail message for Jim] Hey, what's that word we made up when you have a thing stuck in your shoe? Anyway, I have a thing stuck in my shoe.
Pam: [voicemail message for Jim] Hey, I have a chance to sneak out of here early, and I'm not messing this up, so I'll see you tomorrow.
Pam: [voicemail message for Jim] Calling from my cell phone. I don't know if you guys figured out who did that to Michael's carpet yet, but I have a theory that involves an inter-departmental conspiracy. Everybody in the office. We need to talk.
Pam: Today's a 'women in the workplace' thing. Jan's coming in from Corporate to talk to all the women about... um... I don't really know what. But Michael's not allowed in. She said that about five times.
Pam: Jan.
Pam: Michael's still at the door.
Pam: Mmmhmm.
Pam: I don't know how I fit in with these women. Here. Or with Jan. Um... I mean we get along great. Fine. Um... I guess the person I have the most in common with is...
Pam: Well... I always dreamed of a house with a terrace upstairs. Plant flowers on it... stuff like that. Since I was a girl. Um... More seriously though, a husband that I love... Roy. And I love to draw. And I... I did a little in college and I'd still love to do something where I could work with art or graphic design in some way.
Pam: Thanks.
Pam: Well... I have a job right now, so I can't really take time off...
Pam: Well... it's just that the weekends aren't good because, um...
Pam: Hey.
Pam: How's it going down there?
Pam: Good. We watched a video about our changing bodies.
Pam: No. [laughs]
Pam: Almost.
Pam: Um... but hey? Something kind of cool. There's this internship in graphic design that Jan was telling us about. She made it sound, like, really great.
Pam: Um...
Pam: It's really cool.
Pam: Dreams are just that. They're dreams. They help get you through the day. Like the thing about the terrace. It's nice but... um... I don't know. It was just something I read in this book when I was twelve. The girl in the book has a terrace outside of her bedroom and she planted flowers on it and I just loved that. Just always kind of stuck with me.
Pam: How did you know?
Pam: Just like no big reason. Just a bunch of little reasons.
Pam: Roy's right. There's no guarantee it's going to lead to anything anyway.
Pam: What? You have something you want to say?
Pam: Oh, excuse me! I'm fine with my choices!
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: It's impractical. I'm not going to try to get a house like that. Um... they don't even make houses like that in Scranton. So, I'm never going to... .
Pam: Dunder Mifflin. This is Pam. Uh... hold, please.
Pam: You did?
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: Okay.
Pam: How about that one?
Pam: You did?
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: Okay.
Pam: How about that one?
Pam: I really like Valentine's Day in this office. It's kinda like grade school. Everybody gives out little presents and stuff. Like last year, Jim gave me this card, with Dwight's head on it, it was horrifying and funny and...
Pam: [Delivery man enters with a bouquet of red roses. Pam stands up to look at card.] Phyllis.
Pam: Roy and I are saving for the wedding, so I made him promise not to get me anything too big.
Pam: That's OK.
Pam: Guess what?
Pam: That's great. [Meredith scowls]
Pam: OH, Holy God!
Pam: You can't fire me, Dwight, just 'cause Michael's not here.
Pam: You need to get something for your girlfriend.
Pam: Tightly wound?
Pam: Ok, well, sometimes the gift is really about the gesture, you know, like what it means, instead of what it is.
Pam: No, not like a ham. It's about doing something, so that the person knows that you really care about her.
Pam: That you remember her.
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: [delivering plant to Oscar's desk] Oscar.
Pam: [walks away] Join the club.
Pam: Hey.
Pam: I guess, yeah.
Pam: Nothing, it's just I had to sit here all day, while Phyllis got like an entire garden delivered to her.
Pam: I mean, I know that we said no big gifts, but I was kind of hoping you'd get me something for Valentine's Day.
Pam: Heading out?
Pam: Bye. [Jim leaves]
Pam: Night Phyllis.
Pam: Michael's got a few tricks for Valentine's Day. He found a place where you can get 12 plastic roses for $10 and he's got a great line. "Me so thorny."
Pam: You have any big Valentine's Day plans, Kev?
Pam: Where is she?
Pam: Cool.
Pam: I'm gonna spend it with my fiance.
Pam: What are you guys doing?
Pam: Nice.
Pam: Are you sad that Dwight beat you?
Pam: Are you going to cry, Jim? Do you need a tissue?
Pam: Oh! I... uh... yeah. Um... I'll uh show them to you later.
Pam: Ok, cool.
Pam: I have a ton of stuff to do for the wedding. And I have to do it in the office. And that can be kind of awkward. Um... just because people can get all weird about wedding stuff. Then... I just... I don't want to offend... Angela... or someone.
Pam: Mom, I'm sorry. I know you and Dad are chipping in for the wedding but I do not want orange invitations. Yes! Well, if you really want my...
Pam: Do we know anyone who was in the accident?
Pam: You mean Toastmasters?
Pam: Yeah, the bride doesn't really do... Have you ever been to a wedding?
Pam: Roy has a connection. It's nicer than you think.
Pam: Of course. He's one of my closest friends.
Pam: Maybe we'll use a DJ. That's the one thing Roy's in charge of for this wedding but all he's managed to do is set a date.
Pam: Ryan, you should be more sensitive. It's obvious she likes you and comments like that, they just...
Pam: Australia? I have always wanted to go there?
Pam: That's awesome. Where are you staying?
Pam: When are you leaving?
Pam: Oh.
Pam: Oh yeah. That's too bad.
Pam: It's ok. I got it.
Pam: Yes, but they are both in danger.
Pam: The ones that say "love" on them?
Pam: Oh. Doesn't matter.
Pam: As soon as they leave, well get Kelly and start.
Pam: Is that okay?
Pam: I'm looking forward to 'Take Your Daughter to Work' day. I am not great with kids, but I wanna get better. Because I'm getting married. So, I put out a bunch of extra candy out on my desk so the kids will come talk to me. ...Like the witch in Hanzel and Gretel.
Pam: Oh, I have more. [Holds up bags of candy]
Pam: Oh, Michael. You can't be nasty today. [whispering] 'Cause of the... [points to 'Welcome Daughters!' sign]
Pam: I reminded you last night.
Pam: Don't you think you should say something?
Pam: Michael, I think that as the boss you should really---
Pam: Hey, Abby! Do you want to help me shred some old documents? It's actually pretty cool.
Pam: I only have one goal today. To make one kid like me. Just one.
Pam: That is!
Pam: He's not coming out. He won't pick up the phone.
Pam: So, Melissa... I met your mom a couple times. She's so nice.
Pam: Mmhmm.
Pam: Sure.
Pam: You're welcome.
Pam: It's not too bad. I get to shred things sometimes, do you want to see?
Pam: Really?
Pam: Okay. Um... here it is. Don't put your fingers in there. [shreds paper] Cool huh?
Pam: Yeah, I get to do this like, every week.
Pam: I know.
Pam: I think he thought his ukulele skills would transfer. [Jim leaves]
Pam: My theory is that... [Jim signals he's leaving, waves bye to Pam]
Pam: I like extra cheese, too.
Pam: Yeah. Do you like to draw, Abby?
Pam: Me, too.
Pam: Okay. It's been a little more tiring than I thought.
Pam: Hmm.
Pam: Happy birthday Michael.
Pam: I said happy birthday.
Pam: One's good.
Pam: Michael wants a strippergram?
Pam: Michael, I have Jan on the line.
Pam: I can sign for it.
Pam: When does he hear?
Pam: Ohh... poor Kevin.
Pam: If I knew I had a week to live, I would... probably go to Europe. And South America. And the Grand Canyon. And... I would want to see the Pacific Ocean. ...It would be a pretty busy week.
Pam: ...I feel like we should go get Kevin something. Do you think we can sneak out of here?
Pam: Sixty-nine cup of noodles.
Pam: And his favorite lunch.
Pam: You use fabric softener?
Pam: No, I do.
Pam: [checking watch] We should probably head back.
Pam: You dare me? How old are you?
Pam: [over loudspeaker, imitating Darth Vader] Luke, this is your father. Come set the table for dinner.
Pam: [loudspeaker] Jim Halpert? Price check on fabric softener, the kind that gives you...
Pam: Oh I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Pam: I hate you.
Pam: No. [laughs]
Pam: Who is that?
Pam: I got it.
Pam: Michael?
Pam: This is from all of us.
Pam: Michael's birthday was actually pretty cool. It was a good day. I don't know... It was a good day.
Pam: You are?
Pam: My Mom is coming in to visit. And she lives like two hours away. And she doesn't have a cell phone... which is cool cause it's kind of adding some suspense to my day. And I keep looking over at the door hoping she'll walk in.
Pam: I've decided to show her around. She really wants to meet everybody.
Pam: mmhmm.
Pam: Oh really?
Pam: Um... I just wanted to say that... Just, my Mom's coming in today.
Pam: Thanks, Kevin.
Pam: Usually the day we talk about sexual harassment is the day that everyone harasses me as a joke.
Pam: She's coming in today and maybe just don't joke around about that stuff in front of her.
Pam: Thank you.
Pam: Uh... my mother's coming.
Pam: I don't have any DUI's so I can drive myself, but thanks.
Pam: [ecstatic] Oh my god!
Pam: Hello!
Pam: I love my Mom. Okay. That's probably really the most obvious statement ever.
Pam: Yeah. I'm in charge of this whole area.
Pam: This is where I used to keep my computer.
Pam: But then I moved it.
Pam: Yeah, yeah, but I uh... I switched stuff around because I actually needed like more room for organization. So...
Pam: So this is like, um, an organization station...
Pam: Hey!
Pam: Well, you know... actually, I kind of need to stall a bit. But, it's okay, because I am very used to killing time.
Pam: Mom!
Pam: No.
Pam: Ten minutes.
Pam: Then we can go to dinner.
Pam: He said what?
Pam: Good morning, Michael.
Pam: Nothing. You look nice today.
Pam: You look real thin.
Pam: You just... You look good. Your shirt looks... You look real good.
Pam: Thin handsome, Michael.
Pam: We're not dating.
Pam: We're not dating, I'm engaged.
Pam: I would say no.
Pam: I would drown myself.
Pam: Hey.
Pam: I know we're having that harassment thing this afternoon.
Pam: Sometimes when we IM, I send you that little winking face with the lipstick.
Pam: Yeah. I realize that might be harassment.
Pam: Okay.
Pam: [laughs] Jim does the best impressions. Sometimes he'll look up at me from his desk and he'll just be someone else. Like he'll go um, [makes mournful face, giggles] that's supposed to be Phyllis. I can't do it as good as he can.
Pam: He does everyone in the office.
Pam: Jinx! Buy me a coke.
Pam: No, no, no, no talking. Jim is not allowed to talk until after he buys me a coke. Those are the rules of jinx, and they are unflinchingly rigid. [Jim puts money in drink machine, selection is sold out]
Pam: Sold out? That has never happened in the history of jinx.
Pam: Sorry, that's not my problem.
Pam: Hey guys, what's going on?
Pam: Oh, okay. Well, Michael wants to see everyone in the conference room. [Jim shakes his head. Seems relieved to be getting away from Kelly] But you know what? We have a few minutes so you guys should definitely finish up your conversation. [Jim nods his head as if to say, "Gee, thanks, Pam."]
Pam: I know that Jim has an amazing story about a relative of his who got caught up in the world of drugs.
Pam: Uh, hmmm.
Pam: Wow! He really pulled out the big guns. Fake crying. Did not expect that.
Pam: What? [Jim shakes his head] Did you want to tell me something? You look like you want to tell me something. [Jim shakes his head no] You look like you have something really important to say and you just can't for some reason. [Jim smiles] Come on, you can tell me. Jim, you can tell me anything. [Jim stops smiling and looks down. Pam wonders what that means]
Pam: [placing a coke can in front of Jim] Here. [Jim looks confused] Just buy it from me. I haven't talked to you in hours and it's been weird and I really want to know what the hell's going on with Dwight. [Pam scoots the coke can towards Jim. Jim pulls out his wallet and hands Pam a dollar. He gives the coke back to Pam]
Pam: Hey.
Pam: Ten minutes.
Pam: Kevin.
Pam: Do someone else.
Pam: Angela.
Pam: The eyebrow.
Pam: Last night? Let's see.
Pam: I won't. It's just that last night is really hard for me to remember because I was just a teensy bit high. Should I have not said that?
Pam: I know that I shouldn't have done it. But I was in the parking lot at the Quick and Easy.
Pam: And I took a bong hit from my Bong Water with my pimp.
Pam: Has she been on the phone the whole time?
Pam: [reading from Michael's flier] "Drugs: Let's not and say we did." I think Michael was high when he wrote this.
Pam: [telephone ringing] Dunder Mifflin. This is Pam. Um, hold, please. [to Jim] There's a Brenda on the phone for you. [to Brenda] Just one second, I'll transfer.
Pam: No.
Pam: Yeah?
Pam: Oh, thanks!
Pam: Uh...
Pam: There are a few people I decided not to invite, and that might make things kind of awkward but ... it's my wedding. And I don't want anyone there who has called me a hussy.
Pam: Win!
Pam: How about, Angela can keep it up on Tuesdays and Thursdays?
Pam: Win.
Pam: Win
Pam: Hey, Angela.[hands her a Save The Date card] I didn't have your zip code.
Pam: Nice.
Pam: [notices Angela's intense concern] Um... let's move on. I volunteer. Did anyone have a problem with me?
Pam: Wait, what did it say?
Pam: I have this kind of big secret about Angela. And I've been really nice to her... and I haven't told anyone. And what the hell?!
Pam: [gets up and walks over to Angela, whispering to her] Hey. Thanks for ratting me out!
Pam: I find that hard to believe... considering you have problems with every single person in this entire office except Bobblehead Joe.
Pam: I can't believe Angela. I went against my better judgment, and I gave her a Save The Date. And now it turns out she complained about me to Toby.
Pam: Don't take her side.
Pam: I don't know. I try not to bother him about this kind of stuff.
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: Angela, I want to talk to you about something.
Pam: [looks at to Jim] I am. [looks at Angela] It's about the Save The Date.
Pam: What?!
Pam: Okay.
Pam: [telephone ringing] Dunder Mifflin. This is Pam. Hold, please. Dwight, it's the Sheriff. He said that it's really important. It's regarding your desk. I'll transfer.
Pam: That's not bad. Hey, do you do weddings?
Pam: It's a nice tux.
Pam: Come on, it'll be fun, and besides, I'm a roulette expert.
Pam: No, they stopped making that show.
Pam: No, that's Afghan.
Pam: Oh, nothing.
Pam: They're wedding bands.
Pam: Roy was supposed to pick the band, but he's concentrating more on the bachelor party now.
Pam: There's a KISS cover band in here.
Pam: I'm pretty happy these days. I'm getting married soon and I'm getting along with everybody at work.
Pam: I think I should hire them all. Do like Lollapalooza.
Pam: Have three stages, yeah.
Pam: Oh.
Pam: Oh, wait. That's Kevin. On the drums.
Pam: On the drums! On the drums!
Pam: Oh, my...
Pam: No! No!
Pam: No, come back! No, no, no!
Pam: Jim is great. Being with him just takes away all the stress of planning my wedding.
Pam: [phone rings] Michael, Carol Stills for you.
Pam: Carol Stills.
Pam: Your realtor.
Pam: It's still me.
Pam: Sometimes I don't put Michael through until he's already said something. I look at it as a practice run for him. He usually does better on the second attempt.
Pam: Carol, you're on with Michael.
Pam: Michael, Jan's on line two.
Pam: It's still me. Uh, Jan, here's Michael.
Pam: [People playing casino games as the actual Casino Night begins] Oh, my God!
Pam: "Yeah, right," what?
Pam: [Laughs] I have good cards.
Pam: Mhmm, And I'm gonna take you all-in.
Pam: Straight.
Pam: It's okay. I'll see you at home.
Pam: Okay.
Pam: Bye! Hey.
Pam: Good, especially after I took all your money in poker.
Pam: About when you want to give me more of your money?
Pam: Did you wanna do that now? We can go inside. I'm feeling kind of good tonight.
Pam: What?
Pam: What are you doing? What do you expect me to say to that?
Pam: Well, I um... I... I can't.
Pam: You have no idea...
Pam: ...what your friendship means to me.
Pam: I can't. I'm really sorry if you misinterpreted things. It's probably my fault.
Pam: [On phone] About 10 minutes ago. No, I didn't know what to say. Yes, I know. Um, I don't know, mom, he's my best friend. Yeah, he's great. Yeah, I think I am. [Jim enters] I have to go. I will. Listen, Jim... [They kiss]
Pam: Apparently Michael has come up with a Dunder Mifflin Mad Lib, and he's making us play it with him. We are so happy. No. I'd like to choose a different adjective.
Pam: It is extremely stressful, planning a wedding by yourself. It's like a job. I mean, it's fun, but it kind of becomes like work. I've already planned it all out in my head. But it's just in my head.
Pam: [laughs]
Pam: Every so often, Jim dies of boredom. I think today it was the expense reports that did him in. And our deal is that, it's up to me to revive him.
Pam: You see Dwight's coffee mug?
Pam: Sometimes when he's not here, I try to throw stuff in it.
Pam: Here.
Pam: Try paperclips. Oh wait. This message. For Dwight.
Pam: Oh.
Pam: You headed out?
Pam: Ok.
Pam: Have a great time.
Pam: Yeah, I changed them to your new address.
Pam: Yup.
Pam: Yes, I changed your Cracked magazine subscription.
Pam: [shakes head]
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: Now the bronze are really blue, and they're also the back side of the gold, so no flipping. K? Honor system.
Pam: Jim, they refer to it as Flonkerton.
Pam: In English, box of paper snowshoe racing.
Pam: The thing about Jim, is when he's excited about something, like the Office Olympics, he gets really into it and he does a really great job. But the problem with Jim is that he works here, so that hardly ever happens.
Pam: Go! Go! Go!
Pam: It's Phyllis!
Pam: Flonkerton.
Pam: Are you sure you don't want to play?
Pam: Come on Angela, don't you have a game?
Pam: Well, let's play, what is it?
Pam: We're friends.
Pam: I made something for our closing ceremonies.
Pam: Automatic voicemail.
Pam: [sees Angela making check mark on tally sheet]
Pam: I have 59 voicemails.
Pam: Sure.
Pam: Really?
Pam: Cool.
Pam: Hey. Morning.
Pam: Okay. What? What is this?
Pam: Oh, my God. What are we gonna do?
Pam: I know. I know what to do.
Pam: Okay. Put everything back exactly how you found it.
Pam: Hey, Dwight. Jim and I found your wallet in the parking lot.
Pam: Dwight, I swear, we didn't do anything.
Pam: Okay. How about skeet Schruteing?
Pam: Mmm-hmmm.
Pam: Thank you.
Pam: Oh, oh.
Pam: Oh!
Pam: Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam. Sure, can I ask who's calling? Just a second.
Pam: Katy and Jim met in the office. And now I guess they're like going out, or dating, or something. And, uh... I don't know! You know? They're just... She calls him, and they... You know, I'm sorry. I feel like I'm talking really loud. Am I talking really loud?
Pam: [to Jim] Hey! You can just give her your extension.
Pam: ...Would You Rather?
Pam: Legends of the Fall?
Pam: Well, I kind of liked Legal...
Pam: I take it back.
Pam: I take it back!
Pam: Okay.
Pam: Um, Fargo, um, Edward Scissorhands, Dazed and Confused...
Pam: Yes. In my top three, so suck it.
Pam: Breakfast Club. Um... The Princess Bride and...
Pam: No, my all time favorite!
Pam: All time favorite.
Pam: You know, I bet Ryan thinks to himself 'I wish I were a volunteer sheriff on the weekends'.
Pam: You should tell him.
Pam: Dwight.
Pam: Kay.
Pam: Hey!
Pam: Um... Oscar's kind of cute.
Pam: Ooh, Toby!
Pam: I forgot what a super, nice girl Katy is. And just... good for Jim! They are so cute together. And, um, what an adorable car.
Pam: That's here.
Pam: I like fire drills. You know what's the greatest? Like, when you were in school and the teacher would let you have class outside.
Pam: Yeah, it was great because it was like you're supposed to be working, but nothing ever gets done.
Pam: [chuckling]
Pam: You're not stuck.
Pam: Really?
Pam: Hey... Happy Halloween. Jan called.
Pam: [entering] You wanted me?
Pam: [notices Michael's costume] Papier-mache?
Pam: Hmm.
Pam: Mm-hmm.
Pam: Why did you put it off until Halloween?
Pam: I think it's gonna put a damper on the party a little.
Pam: So it's a man?
Pam: I just answer the phone.
Pam: You're costume is fantastic! [laughs]
Pam: Oh no, don't, don't, don't, don't. [Michael laughs] Aah! [laughs, then leaves] Okay...
Pam: Okay, greatest strength.
Pam: A dog-like obedience to authority
Pam: But that doesn't sound good.
Pam: He's a gun nut.
Pam: No, I made brownies.
Pam: ... What?
Pam: I made brownies.
Pam: I'm guessing Angela's the one in the neighborhood who gives the trick-or-treaters some toothbrushes. Pennies. Walnuts.
Pam: [on phone] Dunder-Mifflin. This is Pam. [listens] Uh, yeah. [snaps her fingers in the air, getting Jim's attention] Just one second. I will, uh, transfer you to our manager, Michael Scott.
Pam: Jim is really talented. And he should be the one who's getting a better job offer. Like, for real.
Pam: Don't take this the wrong way, but... you should go for that job.
Pam: Yeah, but I mean, look at the salary. And it's definitely a step up. And a challenge.
Pam: Jim...
Pam: What happened?
Pam: Oh. That was like crazy. 'Cause I was...
Pam: Oh, hey, Jim. Wait, stop. Um, I'm sorry... for pushing you towards Cumberland. Seriously, if you left here, I would blow my brains out.
Pam: I don't really have any control over that Stanley.
Pam: Michael tends to procrastinate a bit whenever he has to do work. Umm, time cards, he has to sign these every Friday. Purchase orders have to be approved at the end of every month. And expense reports, all he has to do is initial these at the end of every quarter. But once a year, it all falls on the same Friday and that's today. I call it the Perfect Storm.
Pam: Umm, I put stickers so you know where to sign.
Pam: It's just last year you...
Pam: Well, the last pick-up for overnight deliveries is at seven. So you need to have them signed by then. Or much earlier.
Pam: Well, is that really a priority?
Pam: [Reading Jim's palm] You're major and minor lines cross at a ridge - that sucks.
Pam: I am just following the website.
Pam: Yes, you have very nice teeth.
Pam: Could you practice on the forms?
Pam: I don't know.
Pam: French Onion?
Pam: Ok.
Pam: I just have a quick question.
Pam: No, it's not that. Um, I was just wondering, since I'm probably going to have to stay late, could you ask Dwight to stay late too so he can walk me to my car?
Pam: He's a purple belt. That's really high.
Pam: It's just out there, you...
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: What?
Pam: Well, look closer.
Pam: Once point for me.
Pam: Oh, you're dead.
Pam: Hey, put me down. Put me down. [Meredith turns and looks at Jim and Pam] Oh my god, hey, put me down. Hey...
Pam: Yeah, you too.
Pam: The shipping place closes in a half hour.
Pam: This is what you had Ryan do.
Pam: Well, what about the other stuff that has to be in today?
Pam: Wait, are those Michael's Levis?
Pam: Michael and his jeans. He gets in them, and I'm not exactly sure what happens. But I can tell you, he loves the way he looks in those jeans. I know that's why he started casual Fridays.
Pam: [to Ryan] I'll take those. Thanks. [throws jeans under her desk]
Pam: What is going on?
Pam: Oh my God, I win! Ok, it was a minor league hockey game. He brought his brother, and when I went to the bathroom, the game ended and they forgot about me.
Pam: No, they had to come back for me.
Pam: Umm... it was not that long ago.
Pam: Dunder-Mifflin, this is Pam.
Pam: [to Michael on speakerphone] Ok, you want me to read 'em?
Pam: Ok. Um, a fisherman is walking down Fifth Avenue walking an animal behind him-
Pam: When-
Pam: Ok. There's a transcript between a naval ship-
Pam: Sure. There's a transcript between a naval ship and a lighthouse.
Pam: It is a screenplay. Starring himself.
Pam: Of the FBI.
Pam: What is that?
Pam: Hey, uh, I have to work late.
Pam: Here's what we think happened. Michael's sidekick, who all through the movie is this complete idiot who's causing the downfall of the United States, was originally named Dwight. But then Michael changed it to Samuel L. Chang using a search and replace, but that doesn't work on misspelled words, leaving behind one Dwigt. And Dwight figured it out. Oops.
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: For the bugs.
Pam: Yes... nice! I can't remember the last time someone made me dinner.
Pam: What are you going to do with your time off?
Pam: [points to Jim's iPod] You have new music?
Pam: What!?
Pam: Oh, I don't know... [Jim laughs, phone rings] Oh my God. This is Jan's cell.
Pam: Dunder-Mifflin, this is Pam.
Pam: Oh, really?
Pam: Why might some say that?
Pam: Uh hmm.
Pam: We didn't dance.
Pam: Swaying isn't dancing.
Pam: I have some faxes to get out.
Pam: Hmm...
Pam: Hi.
Pam: I don't know, I think I was just staring at my desk.
Pam: Yeah, do you mind leaving?
Pam: It's very important.
Pam: Thank you.
Pam: Oh! So close to retirement.
Pam: I sincerely doubt it.
Pam: It's performance review day, company-wide. Last year, my performance review started with Michael asking me what my hopes and dreams were, and it ended with him telling me he could bench-press 190 pounds. So, I don't really know what to expect.
Pam: Thank you.
Pam: Oh, no.
Pam: Uh, just off the top... I think she'll be here this afternoon.
Pam: She missed you.
Pam: I have one idea of what it means.
Pam: Well I don't think you're gonna be very happy with this.
Pam: Because she's conflicted. She has to be professional, but she's fighting feelings... for you.
Pam: Um, just cause, that, you work together, and it might be awkward.
Pam: Michael and Jan definitely made out.
Pam: Maybe more.
Pam: Oh, yea!
Pam: Michael?
Pam: Jan's on the phone for you.
Pam: Sorry.
Pam: What suggestion box?
Pam: Oh, yeah. Uh, I think I remember that from back from when I first started.
Pam: Sure.
Pam: Hey, Jim.
Pam: Oh my God, did you see "The Apprentice" last night?
Pam: Can you believe who Trump fired?
Pam: You didn't see it?
Pam: Michael, it's time for the suggestion box meeting.
Pam: You told me to buzz you about the suggestion box meeting when Jan was here.
Pam: Everyone's waiting in the conference room.
Pam: Do you think Michael and Jan actually...
Pam: How do you come back from that?
Pam: No, I mean doing that with Michael. How do you come back from that?
Pam: As a human being.
Pam: [Jim bows to Pam; she bows back] Thank you.
Pam: He sees it.
Pam: Oh, my God. When Dwight said no one wants to come in on a Saturday...
Pam: I almost lost it. That was too good.
Pam: You mean yesterday's paper.
Pam: Thank you.
Pam: [whispers to Jim] Hey. Something just happened. Dwight just told Angela that she has to deleted all of her sensitive e-mails immediately.
Pam: I know!
Pam: Do you think that they're like-
Pam: No, right, no, no.
Pam: Uhhh, ew, ew, ew... .Maybe?
Pam: It's like squishing a spider under a book. It's gonna be really gross but I have to look and make sure that it's really dead. Sooo... [to camera guys] If you guys see anything... ?
Pam: Hey, Dwight, um, my friend is kinda into these two girls that he works with.
Pam: One is tall and brunette, and the other one is short, and blonde, and perky, and kinda judgmental. Who do you think he should choose?
Pam: Ummmm...
Pam: Hey, Angela-
Pam: How's it going?
Pam: Listen, are you bringing anyone to Jim's party tonight?
Pam: No. I mean, I don't know, I don't think so.
Pam: Oh.
Pam: Yeah.
Pam: The professors would go to the parties?
Pam: [to cameraman] What? [looks at Dwight eating a Baby Ruth] Ohhhh... Yes! Thank you!
Pam: Really? That's great.
Pam: Maybe we can get him to hide and wait somewhere.
Pam: Oh, no, he can't make it.
Pam: No thanks.
Pam: Hey.
Pam: Definitely.
Pam: Jim's bedroom.
Pam: Cool... This is your desk.
Pam: Your home office?
Pam: Down. You have to sit down so I can get the full effect.
Pam: Ok, wait, so that would make me [walks to side of room] like right here.
Pam: And Dwight would be like-
Pam: Umm, [gasps] yearbook!
Pam: [finds Jim's picture] Ooooohhh no!
Pam: You were so dorky!
Pam: Hey Phyllis, come here for a second.
Pam: Have you heard anything about any secret office romances?
Pam: That's ok. It's ok.
Pam: Oh, yeah I gave that up.
Pam: Yeah, it turns out I was, um, just grasping at straws.
Pam: Just because two people are hanging out, it doesn't mean that they're together, you know? Like people can just be friends. And I think that it was really unfair to think that there was anything else going on.
Pam: Hey, Michael, accounting needs your approval on-
Pam: Hi!
Pam: Good.
Pam: Thank you.
Pam: We were supposed to go to the barbeque at Jim's house.
Pam: Uhh...
Pam: I might be late.
Pam: Ok.
Pam: [to the cameraman] Did I miss anything?
Pam: Me too. ...I think we're just drunk.
Pam: No... [Jim leans in for another kiss] Jim---
Pam: [loud sigh] Chicken.
Pam: Excellent, thanks.
Pam: Yeah, I didn't go through with the wedding. I got cold feet, a few days before. And I can't really explain it. I just had to get out of that relationship. We still had to pay for all the food. So we froze it. But I'm, I'm doing well. I have my own apartment. I'm taking art classes. And I have lunch for the next five weeks.
Pam: Michael, Dwight's looking at gay pornography on his computer.
Pam: Yup.
Pam: I'm... painting my new apartment tonight.
Pam: Yes.
Pam: Thanks.
Pam: Right.
Pam: What do I think? I think everybody should stay out of everybody's personal business!
Pam: Merry Christ--[looks up] NO! Why... why did you bring that here?
Pam: Dwight, what uh...
Pam: Well, get it out of here.
Pam: I would like it off my desk.
Pam: Can I help you, Michael?
Pam: It's behind you.
Pam: Michael?
Pam: [hands over bag] I didn't, it's from corporate.
Pam: Yup.
Pam: Psst. Jim. [Jim turns around. Pam nods head towards her for him to come over] Um, hey. I need to give you your Christmas gift now because, well, I'll just tell you.
Pam: For the past few months I've been sending Dwight letters from the CIA. [hands a folder to Jim]
Pam: They're considering him for a top secret mission. There's his application. Oh, and this is where I made him list every secret he promised he'd never ever tell.
Pam: So... here's the gift. You get to decide what his top secret mission is. [Jim smiles] Sorry I didn't wrap it.
Pam: Oh.
Pam: Oh yeah.
Pam: No, I get it, of course. OK. [holds out hand for folder. Jim gives Pam back the folder.]
Pam: Michael, what's going on?
Pam: I know.
Pam: OK, well, why are you laying like that?
Pam: Like what?
Pam: Well.. um I, I don't...
Pam: I don't need to know.
Pam: No, thank you.
Pam: I feel like I've been kinda cold to Karen and there's no real reason for it. I mean it's not like she's ever done anything to me. So, I think I probably shouldn't be cold to her.
Pam: Hey, Karen. Sorry about that meeting today, that was really crazy.
Pam: Um, usually like that.
Pam: I think one of her cats did once. She came in with scratches all over her face. [both laugh]
Pam: Um, I really liked your karaoke idea.
Pam: That could really be fun.
Pam: You guys do a raffle?
Pam: There is now. We just started it.
Pam: What's ours again?
Pam: Oh right.
Pam: Right, and if you're interested in the way more fun party, all the info can be found here on our more brightly colored flyer. [Angela rips down brightly colored flyer and walks away. Karen rips down Angela's flyer.]
Pam: You can't do that.