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mod_alice.txt
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mod_alice.txt
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alice s adventures in won#der#land by lewis carroll 1865 chap#ter i down the rab#bit hole alice was be#gin#ning to get ver#y tired of sit#ting by her sis#ter on the bank and of hav#ing noth#ing to do once or twice she had peep#ed in#to the book her sis#ter was read#ing but it had no pictures or conversations in it and what i#s the use of a book thought alice with#out pictures or con#ver#sa#tion so she was considering in her own mind as well as she could for the hot day made her feel ver#y sleep#y and stu#pid wheth#er the pleas#ure of mak#ing a dai#sy chain would be worth the trou#ble of get#ting up and pick#ing the dai#sy#es when sud#den#ly a white rab#bit with pink eyes ran close by her there was noth#ing so ver#y re#mark#a#ble in that nor did alice think it so ver#y much out of the way to hear the rab#bit say to it#self oh dear oh dear i shall be late when she thought it o#ver af#ter#ward#s it oc#curred to her that she ought to have wondered at this but at the time it all seem#ed quite nat#u#ral but when the rab#bit ac#tu#al#ly took a watch out of its waist#coat pock#et and look#ed at it and then hur#ried on alice start#ed to her feet for it flash#ed a#cross her mind that she had nev#er be#fore seen a rab#bit with ei#ther a waist#coat pock#et or a watch to take out of it and burn#ing with cu#ri#os#i#ty she ran a#cross the field af#ter it and fortunately was just in time to see it pop down a large rab#bit hole un#der the hedge in an#oth#er mo#ment down went alice af#ter it nev#er once considering how in the world she was to get out a#gain the rab#bit hole went straight on like a tun#nel for some way and then dip#ped sud#den#ly down so sud#den#ly that alice had not a mo#ment to think a#bout stop#ping her#self be#fore she found her#self fall#ing down a ver#y deep well ei#ther the well was ver#y deep or she fell ver#y slow#ly for she had plen#ty of time as she went down to look a#bout her and to won#der what was go#ing to hap#pen next first she tried to look down and make out what she was com#ing to but it was too dark to see an#y#thing then she look#ed at the sides of the well and no#ticed that they were filled with cup#board#s and book shelves he#re and there she saw map#s and pictures hung up#on peg#s she took down a jar from one of the shelves as she passed it was la#belled or#ange mar#ma#lade but to her great dis#ap#point#ment it was emp#ty she did not like to drop the jar for fear of kill#ing some#bod#y so man#aged to put it in#to one of the cup#board#s as she fell past it well thought alice to her#self af#ter such a fall as this i shall think noth#ing of tum#bling down stairs how brave they ll all think me at home why i wouldn t say an#y#thing a#bout it e#ven if i fell off the top of the house which was ver#y like#ly true down down down would the fall nev#er come to an end i won#der how man#y miles i ve fall#en by this time she sa#id a#loud i must be get#ting some#where near the cent#re of the earth let me see that would be four thou#sand miles down i think for you see alice had learnt sev#er#al thing#s of this sort in her les#son#s in the school#room and though this was not a ver#y good opportunity for show#ing off her knowl#edge as there was no one to lis#ten to her still it was good prac#tice to say it o#ver yes that s a#bout the right dis#tance but then i won#der what lat#i#tude or lon#gi#tude i ve got to alice had no i#de#a what lat#i#tude was or lon#gi#tude ei#ther but thought they were nice grand words to say pres#ent#ly she be#gan a#gain i won#der if i shall fall right through the earth how fun#ny it ll seem to come out a#mong the peo#ple that walk with their heads down#ward the an#tip#a#thy#es i think she was ra#ther glad there was no one list#ening this time as it didn t sound at all the right word but i shall have to ask them what the name of the coun#try i#s you know please ma a#m i#s this new zea#land or aus#tral#i#a and she tried to curt#sey as she spoke fan#cy curt#sey#ing as you re fall#ing through the a#ir do you think you could man#age it and what an ig#no#rant lit#tle girl she ll think me for ask#ing no it ll nev#er do to ask per#haps i shall see it writ#ten up some#where down down down there was noth#ing else to do so alice soon be#gan talk#ing a#gain dinah ll miss me ver#y much to night i should think dinah was the cat i hope they ll re#mem#ber her sau#cer of milk at tea time dinah my dear i wish you were down he#re with me there are no mice in the a#ir i m a#fraid but you might catch a bat and that s ver#y like a mouse you know but do cat#s eat bats i won#der and he#re alice be#gan to get ra#ther sleep#y and went on say#ing to her#self in a dream#y sort of way do cat#s eat bats do cat#s eat bats and some#times do bats eat cat#s for you see as she couldn t an#swer ei#ther ques#tion it didn t much mat#ter which way she put it she felt that she was doz#ing off and had just be#gun to dream that she was walk#ing hand in hand with dinah and say#ing to her ver#y ear#nest#ly now dinah tell me the truth did you ev#er eat a bat when sud#den#ly thump thump down she came up#on a heap of stick#s and dry leaves and the fall was o#ver alice was not a bit hurt and she jump#ed up on to her feet in a mo#ment she look#ed up but it was all dark o#ver#head be#fore her was an#oth#er long pas#sage and the white rab#bit was still in sight hur#ry#ing down it there was not a mo#ment to be lost a#way went alice like the wind and was just in time to hear it say as it turn#ed a cor#ner oh my ear#s and whisk#ers how late it s get#ting she was close be#hind it when she turn#ed the cor#ner but the rab#bit was no long#er to be seen she found her#self in a long low hall which was lit up by a row of lamp#s hang#ing from the roof there were door#s all round the hall but they were all lock#ed and when alice had been all the way down one side and up the oth#er try#ing eve#ry door she walk#ed sad#ly down the mid#dle won#der#ing how she was ev#er to get out a#gain sud#den#ly she came up#on a lit#tle three leg#ged ta#ble all made of sol#id glass there was noth#ing on it ex#cept a ti#ny gold#en key and alice s first thought was that it might be#long to one of the door#s of the hall but a#las ei#ther the lock#s were too large or the key was too small but at an#y rate it would not o#pen an#y of them how#ev#er on the se#cond time round she came up#on a low cur#tain she had not no#ticed be#fore and be#hind it was a lit#tle door a#bout fif#teen inch#es high she tried the lit#tle gold#en key in the lock and to her great de#light it fit#ted alice opened the door and found that it led in#to a small pas#sage not much larg#er than a rat hole she knelt down and look#ed a#long the pas#sage in#to the love#li#est gar#den you ev#er saw how she long#ed to get out of that dark hall and wan#der a#bout a#mong those beds of bright flow#ers and those cool foun#tain#s but she could not e#ven get her head through the door#way and e#ven if my head would go through thought poor alice it would be of ver#y lit#tle use with#out my should#ers oh how i wish i could shut up like a tel#e#scope i think i could if i on#ly know how to be#gin for you see so man#y out of the way thing#s had hap#pened late#ly that alice had be#gun to think that ver#y few thing#s in#deed were re#al#ly im#pos#si#ble there seem#ed to be no use in wait#ing by the lit#tle door so she went back to the ta#ble half hop#ing she might find an#oth#er key on it or at an#y rate a book of rules for shut#ting peo#ple up like telescopes this time she found a lit#tle bot#tle on it which cer#tain#ly was not he#re be#fore sa#id alice and round the neck of the bot#tle was a pa#per la#bel with the words drink me beau#ty#fully print#ed on it in large let#ters it was all ver#y well to say drink me but the wise lit#tle alice was not go#ing to do that in a hur#ry no i ll look first she sa#id and see wheth#er it s marked poi#son or not for she had read sev#er#al nice lit#tle histories a#bout chil#dren who had got burnt and eat#en up by wild beast#s and oth#er un#pleas#ant thing#s all be#cause they would not re#mem#ber the sim#ple rules their friend#s had taught them such as that a red hot pok#er will burn you if you hold it too long and that if you cut your fin#ger ver#y deep#ly with a knife it u#su#al#ly bleeds and she had nev#er for#got#ten that if you drink much from a bot#tle marked poi#son it i#s al#most cer#tain to dis#a#gree with you soon#er or lat#er how#ev#er this bot#tle was not marked poi#son so alice ven#tured to taste it and find#ing it ver#y nice it had in fact a sort of mixed flavour of cher#ry tart cus#tard pine ap#ple roast tur#key tof#fee and hot but#tered toast she ver#y soon fin#ished it off what a cu#ri#ous feel#ing sa#id alice i must be shut#ting up like a tel#e#scope and so it was in#deed she was now on#ly ten inch#es high and her face bright#ened up at the thought that she was now the right size for go#ing through the lit#tle door in#to that love#ly gar#den first how#ev#er she wait#ed for a few min#utes to see if she was go#ing to shrink an#y fur#ther she felt a lit#tle nerv#ous a#bout this for it might end you know sa#id alice to her#self in my go#ing out al#to#geth#er like a can#dle i won#der what i should be like then and she tried to fan#cy what the flame of a can#dle i#s like af#ter the can#dle i#s blown out for she could not re#mem#ber ev#er hav#ing seen such a thing af#ter a while find#ing that noth#ing more hap#pened she de#cid#ed on go#ing in#to the gar#den at once but a#las for poor alice when she got to the door she found she had for#got#ten the lit#tle gold#en key and when she went back to the ta#ble for it she found she could not pos#si#bly reach it she could see it quite plain#ly through the glass and she tried her best to climb up one of the leg#s of the ta#ble but it was too slip#per#y and when she had tired her#self out with try#ing the poor lit#tle thing sat down and cried come there s no use in cry#ing like that sa#id alice to her#self ra#ther sharp#ly i ad#vise you to leave off this mi#nute she gen#er#al#ly gave her#self ver#y good ad#vice though she ver#y sel#dom fol#low#ed it and some#times she scold#ed her#self so se#vere#ly as to br#ing tears in#to her eyes and once she remembered try#ing to box her own ear#s for hav#ing cheated her#self in a game of cro#quet she was play#ing a#gainst her#self for this cu#ri#ous child was ver#y fond of pre#tend#ing to be two peo#ple but it s no use now thought poor alice to pre#tend to be two peo#ple why there s hard#ly e#nough of me left to make one re#spect#able per#son soon her eye fell on a lit#tle glass box that was ly#ing un#der the ta#ble she opened it and found in it a ver#y small cake on which the words eat me were beau#ty#fully marked in cur#rants well i ll eat it sa#id alice and if it makes me grow larg#er i can reach the key and if it makes me grow smaller i can creep un#der the door so ei#ther way i ll get in#to the gar#den and i don t care which hap#pens she a#te a lit#tle bit and sa#id anx#ious#ly to her#self which way which way hold#ing her hand on the top of her head to feel which way it was grow#ing and she was quite sur#prised to find that she re#main#ed the same size to be sure this gen#er#al#ly hap#pens when one eats cake but alice had got so much in#to the way of ex#pect#ing noth#ing but out of the way thing#s to hap#pen that it seem#ed quite dull and stu#pid for life to go on in the com#mon way so she set to work and ver#y soon fin#ished off the cake chap#ter ii the pool of tears curiouser and curiouser cried alice she was so much sur#prised that for the mo#ment she quite for#got how to speak good eng#lish now i m o#pen#ing out like the larg#est tel#e#scope that ev#er was good bye feet for when she look#ed down at her feet they seem#ed to be al#most out of sight they were get#ting so far off oh my poor lit#tle feet i won#der who will put on your shoes and stock#ings for you now dear#s i m sure i shan t be a#ble i shall be a great deal too far off to trou#ble my#self a#bout you you must man#age the best way you can but i must be kind to them thought alice or per#haps they won t walk the way i want to go let me see i ll give them a new pair of boots eve#ry christ#mas and she went on plan#ning to her#self how she would man#age it they must go by the car#ri#er she thought and how fun#ny it ll seem send#ing pres#ents to one s own feet and how odd the di#rec#tions will look alice s right foot esq hearthrug near the fend#er with alice s love oh dear what non#sense i m talk#ing just then her head struck a#gainst the roof of the hall in fact she was now more than nine feet high and she at once took up the lit#tle gold#en key and hur#ried off to the gar#den door poor alice it was as much as she could do ly#ing down on one side to look through in#to the gar#den with one eye but to get through was more hope#less than ev#er she sat down and be#gan to cry a#gain you ought to be a#shamed of your#self sa#id alice a great girl like you she might well say this to go on cry#ing in this way stop this mo#ment i tell you but she went on all the same shed#ding gal#lon#s of tears un#til there was a large pool all round her a#bout four inch#es deep and reach#ing half down the hall af#ter a time she heard a lit#tle pat#tering of feet in the dis#tance and she hast#i#ly dried her eyes to see what was com#ing it was the white rab#bit re#turn#ing splen#did#ly dress#ed with a pair of white kid gloves in one hand and a large fan in the oth#er he came trot#ting a#long in a great hur#ry muttering to him#self as he came oh the duch#ess the duch#ess oh won t she be sav#age if i ve kept her wait#ing alice felt so des#per#ate that she was read#y to ask help of an#y one so when the rab#bit came near her she be#gan in a low tim#id voice if you please sir the rab#bit start#ed vi#ol#ently drop#ped the white kid gloves and the fan and skurried a#way in#to the dark#ness as hard as he could go alice took up the fan and gloves and as the hall was ver#y hot she kept fan#ning her#self all the time she went on talk#ing dear dear how queer eve#ry#thing i#s to day and yes#ter#day thing#s went on just as u#su#al i won#der if i ve been changed in the night let me think was i the same when i got up this morn#ing i al#most think i can re#mem#ber feel#ing a lit#tle dif#fer#ent but if i m not the same the next ques#tion i#s who in the world a#m i ah that s the great puz#zle and she be#gan think#ing o#ver all the chil#dren she knew that were of the same age as her#self to see if she could have been changed for an#y of them i m sure i m not ada she sa#id for her hair goes in such long ring#let#s and mine doesn t go in ring#let#s at all and i m sure i can t be mabel for i know all sort#s of thing#s and she oh she know#s such a ver#y lit#tle be#sides she s she and i m i and oh dear how puzzling it all i#s i ll try if i know all the thing#s i used to know let me see four times five i#s twelve and four times six i#s thir#teen and four times sev#en i#s oh dear i shall nev#er get to twen#ty at that rate how#ev#er the mul#ti#pli#ca#tion ta#ble doesn t sig#ni#fy let s try ge#og#ra#phy lon#don i#s the cap#i#tal of pa#r#is and pa#r#is i#s the cap#i#tal of rome and rome no that s all wrong i m cer#tain i must have been changed for mabel i ll try and say how doth the lit#tle and she crossed her hands on her lap as if she were say#ing les#son#s and be#gan to re#peat it but her voice sound#ed hoarse and strange and the words did not come the same as they used to do how doth the lit#tle croc#o#dile im#prove his shin#ing tail and pour the waters of the nil#e on eve#ry gold#en scale how cheer#ful#ly he seem#s to grin how neat#ly spread his claw#s and wel#come lit#tle fish#es in with gen#tly smil#ing jaws i m sure those are not the right words sa#id poor alice and her eyes filled with tears a#gain as she went on i must be mabel af#ter all and i shall have to go and live in that pok#y lit#tle house and have next to no toy#s to play with and oh ev#er so man#y les#son#s to learn no i ve made up my mind a#bout it if i m mabel i ll stay down he#re it ll be no use their put#ting their heads down and say#ing come up a#gain dear i shall on#ly look up and say who a#m i then tell me that first and then if i like be#ing that per#son i ll come up if not i ll stay down he#re till i m some#bod#y else but oh dear cried alice with a sud#den burst of tears i do wish they would put their heads down i a#m so ver#y tired of be#ing all a#lone he#re as she sa#id this she look#ed down at her hands and was sur#prised to see that she had put on one of the rab#bit s lit#tle white kid gloves while she was talk#ing how can i have done that she thought i must be grow#ing small a#gain she got up and went to the ta#ble to meas#ure her#self by it and found that as near#ly as she could guess she was now a#bout two feet high and was go#ing on shrink#ing rap#id#ly she soon found out that the cause of this was the fan she was hold#ing and she drop#ped it hast#i#ly just in time to a#void shrink#ing a#way al#to#geth#er that was a nar#row es#cape sa#id alice a good deal fright#ened at the sud#den change but ver#y glad to find her#self still in ex#ist#ence and now for the gar#den and she ran with all speed back to the lit#tle door but a#las the lit#tle door was shut a#gain and the lit#tle gold#en key was ly#ing on the glass ta#ble as be#fore and thing#s are worse than ev#er thought the poor child for i nev#er was so small as this be#fore nev#er and i de#clare it s too bad that it i#s as she sa#id these words her foot slip#ped and in an#oth#er mo#ment splash she was up to her chin in salt wa#ter her first i#de#a was that she had some#how fall#en in#to the sea and in that case i can go back by rail#way she sa#id to her#self alice had been to the sea#side once in her life and had come to the gen#er#al con#clu#sion that wher#ev#er you go to on the eng#lish coast you find a num#ber of bath#ing machines in the sea some chil#dren dig#ging in the sand with wood#en spades then a row of lodg#ing hous#es and be#hind them a rail#way sta#tion how#ev#er she soon made out that she was in the pool of tears which she had wept when she was nine feet high i wish i hadn t cried so much sa#id alice as she swam a#bout try#ing to find her way out i shall be pun#ished for it now i sup#pose by be#ing drown#ed in my own tears that will be a queer thing to be sure how#ev#er eve#ry#thing i#s queer to day just then she heard some#thing splashing a#bout in the pool a lit#tle way off and she swam near#er to make out what it was at first she thought it must be a wal#rus or hip#po#pot#a#mus but then she remembered how small she was now and she soon made out that it was on#ly a mouse that had slip#ped in like her#self would it be of an#y use now thought alice to speak to this mouse eve#ry#thing i#s so out of the way down he#re that i should think ver#y like#ly it can talk at an#y rate there s no harm in try#ing so she be#gan o mouse do you know the way out of this pool i a#m ver#y tired of swim#ming a#bout he#re o mouse alice thought this must be the right way of speak#ing to a mouse she had nev#er done such a thing be#fore but she remembered hav#ing seen in her broth#er s lat#in gram#mar a mouse of a mouse to a mouse a mouse o mouse the mouse look#ed at her ra#ther inquisitively and seem#ed to her to wink with one of its lit#tle eyes but it sa#id noth#ing per#haps it doesn t un#der#stand eng#lish thought alice i daresay it s a french mouse come o#ver with wil#liam the con#quer#or for with all her knowl#edge of his#to#ry alice had no ver#y clear no#tion how long a#go an#y#thing had hap#pened so she be#gan a#gain ou est ma chat#te which was the first sen#tence in her french les#son book the mouse gave a sud#den leap out of the wa#ter and seem#ed to quiv#er all o#ver with fright oh i beg your par#don cried alice hast#i#ly a#fraid that she had hurt the poor an#i#mal s feel#ings i quite for#got you didn t like cat#s not like cat#s cried the mouse in a shrill pas#sion#ate voice would you like cat#s if you were me well per#haps not sa#id alice in a sooth#ing tone don t be an#gry a#bout it and yet i wish i could show you our cat dinah i think you d take a fan#cy to cat#s if you could on#ly see her she i#s such a dear qui#et thing alice went on half to her#self as she swam la#zi#ly a#bout in the pool and she sit#s purring so nice#ly by the fire lick#ing her paw#s and wash#ing her face and she i#s such a nice soft thing to nurse and she s such a cap#i#tal one for catch#ing mice oh i beg your par#don cried alice a#gain for this time the mouse was bristling all o#ver and she felt cer#tain it must be re#al#ly of#fend#ed we won t talk a#bout her an#y more if you d ra#ther not we in#deed cried the mouse who was trembling down to the end of his tail as if i would talk on such a sub#ject our fam#i#ly al#ways hat#ed cat#s nas#ty low vul#gar thing#s don t let me hear the name a#gain i won t in#deed sa#id alice in a great hur#ry to change the sub#ject of con#ver#sa#tion are you are you fond of of dogs the mouse did not an#swer so alice went on ea#ger#ly there i#s such a nice lit#tle dog near our house i should like to show you a lit#tle bright eyed ter#ri#er you know with oh such long curl#y brown hair and it ll fetch thing#s when you throw them and it ll sit up and beg for its din#ner and all sort#s of thing#s i can t re#mem#ber half of them and it be#long#s to a far#mer you know and he say#s it s so use#ful it s worth a hun#dred pound#s he say#s it kills all the rats and oh dear cried alice in a sor#row#ful tone i m a#fraid i ve of#fend#ed it a#gain for the mouse was swim#ming a#way from her as hard as it could go and mak#ing quite a com#mo#tion in the pool as it went so she called soft#ly af#ter it mouse dear do come back a#gain and we won t talk a#bout cat#s or dogs ei#ther if you don t like them when the mouse heard this it turn#ed round and swam slow#ly back to her its face was quite pale with pas#sion alice thought and it sa#id in a low trembling voice let us get to the shore and then i ll tell you my his#to#ry and you ll un#der#stand why it i#s i hate cat#s and dogs it was high time to go for the pool was get#ting quite crowd#ed with the bird#s and animals that had fall#en in#to it there were a duck and a do#do a lory and an ea#glet and sev#er#al oth#er cu#ri#ous creatures alice led the way and the whole par#ty swam to the shore chap#ter iii a cau#cus race and a long tale they were in#deed a queer look#ing par#ty that as#sem#bled on the bank the bird#s with draggled feath#ers the animals with their fur cling#ing close to them and all drip#ping wet cross and uncomfortable the first ques#tion of course was how to get dry a#gain they had a con#sul#ta#tion a#bout this and af#ter a few min#utes it seem#ed quite nat#u#ral to alice to find her#self talk#ing fa#mil#iar#ly with them as if she had known them all her life in#deed she had quite a long ar#gu#ment with the lory who at last turn#ed sulk#y and would on#ly say i a#m old#er than you and must know bet#ter and this alice would not al#low with#out know#ing how old it was and as the lory pos#i#tive#ly re#fused to tell its age there was no more to be sa#id at last the mouse who seem#ed to be a per#son of au#thor#i#ty a#mong them called out sit down all of you and lis#ten to me i ll soon make you dry e#nough they all sat down at once in a large ring with the mouse in the mid#dle alice kept her eyes anx#ious#ly fixed on it for she felt sure she would catch a bad cold if she did not get dry ver#y soon a#hem sa#id the mouse with an im#por#tant a#ir are you all read#y this i#s the dri#est thing i know si#lence all round if you please wil#liam the con#quer#or whose cause was favoured by the pope was soon sub#mit#ted to by the eng#lish who want#ed lead#ers and had been of late much ac#cus#tomed to u#sur#pa#tion and con#quest edwin and morcar the earl#s of mercia and northumbria ugh sa#id the lory with a shiv#er i beg your par#don sa#id the mouse frown#ing but ver#y po#lite#ly did you speak not i sa#id the lory hast#i#ly i thought you did sa#id the mouse i pro#ceed edwin and morcar the earl#s of mercia and northumbria de#clared for him and e#ven stigand the pa#tri#ot#ic arch#bish#op of can#ter#bur#y found it ad#vis#a#ble found what sa#id the duck found it the mouse re#ply#ed ra#ther cross#ly of course you know what it means i know what it means well e#nough when i find a thing sa#id the duck it s gen#er#al#ly a frog or a worm the ques#tion i#s what did the arch#bish#op find the mouse did not no#tice this ques#tion but hur#ried#ly went on found it ad#vis#a#ble to go with edgar atheling to meet wil#liam and of#fer him the crown wil#liam s con#duct at first was mod#er#ate but the in#so#lence of his norm#ans how are you get#ting on now my dear it con#tin#ued turn#ing to alice as it spoke as wet as ev#er sa#id alice in a mel#an#chol#y tone it doesn t seem to dry me at all in that case sa#id the do#do sol#emn#ly ris#ing to its feet i move that the meet#ing ad#journ for the im#me#di#ate a#dop#tion of more en#er#get#ic rem#e#dy#es speak eng#lish sa#id the ea#glet i don t know the mean#ing of half those long words and what s more i don t be#lieve you do ei#ther and the ea#glet bent down its head to hide a smile some of the oth#er bird#s tit#tered au#di#bly what i was go#ing to say sa#id the do#do in an of#fend#ed tone was that the best thing to get us dry would be a cau#cus race what i#s a cau#cus race sa#id alice not that she want#ed much to know but the do#do had paused as if it thought that some#bod#y ought to speak and no one else seem#ed in#clined to say an#y#thing why sa#id the do#do the best way to ex#plain it i#s to do it and as you might like to try the thing your#self some win#ter day i will tell you how the do#do man#aged it first it marked out a race course in a sort of cir#cle the ex#act shape doesn t mat#ter it sa#id and then all the par#ty were placed a#long the course he#re and there there was no one two three and a#way but they be#gan run#ning when they liked and left off when they liked so that it was not eas#y to know when the race was o#ver how#ev#er when they had been run#ning half an hour or so and were quite dry a#gain the do#do sud#den#ly called out the race i#s o#ver and they all crowd#ed round it pant#ing and ask#ing but who has won this ques#tion the do#do could not an#swer with#out a great deal of thought and it sat for a long time with one fin#ger press#ed up#on its fore#head the po#si#tion in which you u#su#al#ly see shake#speare in the pictures of him while the rest wait#ed in si#lence at last the do#do sa#id eve#ry#bod#y has won and all must have prizes but who i#s to give the prizes quite a cho#rus of voices ask#ed why she of course sa#id the do#do point#ing to alice with one fin#ger and the whole par#ty at once crowd#ed round her call#ing out in a con#fused way prizes prizes alice had no i#de#a what to do and in de#spair she put her hand in her pock#et and pulled out a box of com#fit#s luck#i#ly the salt wa#ter had not got in#to it and hand#ed them round as prizes there was ex#act#ly one a piece all round but she must have a prize her#self you know sa#id the mouse of course the do#do re#ply#ed ver#y grave#ly what else have you got in your pock#et he went on turn#ing to alice on#ly a thim#ble sa#id alice sad#ly hand it o#ver he#re sa#id the do#do then they all crowd#ed round her once more while the do#do sol#emn#ly presented the thim#ble say#ing we beg your ac#cept#ance of this el#e#gant thim#ble and when it had fin#ished this short speech they all cheered alice thought the whole thing ver#y ab#surd but they all look#ed so gra#ve that she did not dare to laugh and as she could not think of an#y#thing to say she sim#ply bow#ed and took the thim#ble look#ing as sol#emn as she could the next thing was to eat the com#fit#s this caused some noise and con#fu#sion as the large bird#s com#plain#ed that they could not taste theirs and the small ones choked and had to be pat#ted on the back how#ev#er it was o#ver at last and they sat down a#gain in a ring and beg#ged the mouse to tell them some#thing more you prom#ised to tell me your his#to#ry you know sa#id alice and why it i#s you hate c and d she added in a whis#per half a#fraid that it would be of#fend#ed a#gain mine i#s a long and a sad tale sa#id the mouse turn#ing to alice and sigh#ing it i#s a long tail cer#tain#ly sa#id alice look#ing down with won#der at the mouse s tail but why do you call it sad and she kept on puzzling a#bout it while the mouse was speak#ing so that her i#de#a of the tale was some#thing like this fu#ry sa#id to a mouse that he met in the house let us both go to law i will pros#e#cute you come i ll take no de#ni#al we must have a tri#al for re#al#ly this morn#ing i ve noth#ing to do sa#id the mouse to the cur such a tri#al dear sir with no ju#ry or judge would be wast#ing our breath i ll be judge i ll be ju#ry sa#id cun#ning old fu#ry i ll try the whole cause and con#demn you to death you are not at#tend#ing sa#id the mouse to alice se#vere#ly what are you think#ing of i beg your par#don sa#id alice ver#y hum#bly you had got to the fifth bend i think i had not cried the mouse sharp#ly and ver#y an#gri#ly a knot sa#id alice al#ways read#y to make her#self use#ful and look#ing anx#ious#ly a#bout her oh do let me help to un#do it i shall do noth#ing of the sort sa#id the mouse get#ting up and walk#ing a#way you in#sult me by talk#ing such non#sense i didn t mean it plead#ed poor alice but you re so eas#i#ly of#fend#ed you know the mouse on#ly growl#ed in re#ply please come back and fin#ish your sto#ry alice called af#ter it and the others all join#ed in cho#rus yes please do but the mouse on#ly shook its head impatiently and walk#ed a lit#tle quick#er what a pit#y it wouldn t stay sigh#ed the lory as soon as it was quite out of sight and an old crab took the opportunity of say#ing to her daugh#ter ah my dear let this be a les#son to you nev#er to lose your tem#per hold your tongue ma sa#id the young crab a lit#tle snap#pishly you re e#nough to try the pa#tience of an oys#ter i wish i had our dinah he#re i know i do sa#id alice a#loud ad#dress#ing no#bod#y in par#tic#u#lar she d soon fetch it back and who i#s dinah if i might ven#ture to ask the ques#tion sa#id the lory alice re#ply#ed ea#ger#ly for she was al#ways read#y to talk a#bout her pet dinah s our cat and she s such a cap#i#tal one for catch#ing mice you can t think and oh i wish you could see her af#ter the bird#s why she ll eat a lit#tle bird as soon as look at it this speech caused a re#mark#a#ble sen#sa#tion a#mong the par#ty some of the bird#s hur#ried off at once one old mag#pie be#gan wrap#ping it#self up ver#y care#ful#ly re#mark#ing i re#al#ly must be get#ting home the night a#ir doesn t suit my throat and a ca#nar#y called out in a trembling voice to its chil#dren come a#way my dear#s it s high time you were all in bed on var#i#ous pre#text#s they all moved off and alice was soon left a#lone i wish i hadn t mentioned dinah she sa#id to her#self in a mel#an#chol#y tone no#bod#y seem#s to like her down he#re and i m sure she s the best cat in the world oh my dear dinah i won#der if i shall ev#er see you an#y more and he#re poor alice be#gan to cry a#gain for she felt ver#y lone#ly and low spir#it#ed in a lit#tle while how#ev#er she a#gain heard a lit#tle pat#tering of foot#step#s in the dis#tance and she look#ed up ea#ger#ly half hop#ing that the mouse had changed his mind and was com#ing back to fin#ish his sto#ry chap#ter iv the rab#bit send#s in a lit#tle bill it was the white rab#bit trot#ting slow#ly back a#gain and look#ing anx#ious#ly a#bout as it went as if it had lost some#thing and she heard it muttering to it#self the duch#ess the duch#ess oh my dear paw#s oh my fur and whisk#ers she ll get me ex#e#cut#ed as sure as fer#ret#s are fer#ret#s where can i have drop#ped them i won#der alice guess#ed in a mo#ment that it was look#ing for the fan and the pair of white kid gloves and she ver#y good naturedly be#gan hunt#ing a#bout for them but they were no#where to be seen eve#ry#thing seem#ed to have changed since her swim in the pool and the great hall with the glass ta#ble and the lit#tle door had van#ished com#plete#ly ver#y soon the rab#bit no#ticed alice as she went hunt#ing a#bout and called out to her in an an#gry tone why mar#y ann what are you do#ing out he#re run home this mo#ment and fetch me a pair of gloves and a fan quick now and alice was so much fright#ened that she ran off at once in the di#rec#tion it point#ed to with#out try#ing to ex#plain the mis#take it had made he took me for his house#maid she sa#id to her#self as she ran how sur#prised he ll be when he find#s out who i a#m but i d bet#ter take him his fan and gloves that i#s if i can find them as she sa#id this she came up#on a neat lit#tle house on the door of which was a bright bras#s plate with the name w rab#bit en#graved up#on it she went in with#out knock#ing and hur#ried up#stairs in great fear lest she should meet the re#al mar#y ann and be turn#ed out of the house be#fore she had found the fan and gloves how queer it seem#s alice sa#id to her#self to be go#ing mess#ages for a rab#bit i sup#pose dinah ll be send#ing me on mess#ages next and she be#gan fan#cy#ing the sort of thing that would hap#pen miss alice come he#re di#rect#ly and get read#y for your walk com#ing in a mi#nute nurse but i ve got to see that the mouse doesn t get out on#ly i don t think alice went on that they d let dinah stop in the house if it be#gan ordering peo#ple a#bout like that by this time she had found her way in#to a tid#y lit#tle room with a ta#ble in the win#dow and on it as she had hop#ed a fan and two or three pairs of ti#ny white kid gloves she took up the fan and a pair of the gloves and was just go#ing to leave the room when her eye fell up#on a lit#tle bot#tle that stood near the look#ing glass there was no la#bel this time with the words drink me but nev#er#the#less she un#cork#ed it and put it to her lip#s i know some#thing in#ter#est#ing i#s sure to hap#pen she sa#id to her#self when#ev#er i eat or drink an#y#thing so i ll just see what this bot#tle does i do hope it ll make me grow large a#gain for re#al#ly i m quite tired of be#ing such a ti#ny lit#tle thing it did so in#deed and much soon#er than she had ex#pect#ed be#fore she had drunk half the bot#tle she found her head press#ing a#gainst the ceil#ing and had to stoop to save her neck from be#ing bro#ken she hast#i#ly put down the bot#tle say#ing to her#self that s quite e#nough i hope i shan t grow an#y more as it i#s i can t get out at the door i do wish i hadn t drunk quite so much a#las it was too late to wish that she went on grow#ing and grow#ing and ver#y soon had to kneel down on the floor in an#oth#er mi#nute there was not e#ven room for this and she tried the ef#fect of ly#ing down with one el#bow a#gainst the door and the oth#er arm curl#ed round her head still she went on grow#ing and as a last re#source she put one arm out of the win#dow and one foot up the chim#ney and sa#id to her#self now i can do no more what#ev#er hap#pens what will be#come of me luck#i#ly for alice the lit#tle mag#ic bot#tle had now had its full ef#fect and she grew no larg#er still it was ver#y uncomfortable and as there seem#ed to be no sort of chance of her ev#er get#ting out of the room a#gain no won#der she felt un#hap#py it was much pleas#anter at home thought poor alice when one wasn t al#ways grow#ing larg#er and smaller and be#ing ordered a#bout by mice and rab#bit#s i al#most wish i hadn t gone down that rab#bit hole and yet and yet it s ra#ther cu#ri#ous you know this sort of life i do won#der what can have hap#pened to me when i used to read fair#y ta#les i fan#cied that kind of thing nev#er hap#pened and now he#re i a#m in the mid#dle of one there ought to be a book writ#ten a#bout me that there ought and when i grow up i ll write one but i m grown up now she added in a sor#row#ful tone at least there s no room to grow up an#y more he#re but then thought alice shall i nev#er get an#y old#er than i a#m now that ll be a com#fort one way nev#er to be an old wom#an but then al#ways to have les#son#s to learn oh i shouldn t like that oh you fool#ish alice she answered her#self how can you learn les#son#s in he#re why there s hard#ly room for you and no room at all for an#y les#son book#s and so she went on tak#ing first one side and then the oth#er and mak#ing quite a con#ver#sa#tion of it al#to#geth#er but af#ter a few min#utes she heard a voice out#side and stopped to lis#ten mar#y ann mar#y ann sa#id the voice fetch me my gloves this mo#ment then came a lit#tle pat#tering of feet on the stairs alice knew it was the rab#bit com#ing to look for her and she trembled till she shook the house quite for#get#ting that she was now a#bout a thou#sand times as large as the rab#bit and had no rea#son to be a#fraid of it pres#ent#ly the rab#bit came up to the door and tried to o#pen it but as the door opened in#wards and alice s el#bow was press#ed hard a#gainst it that at#tempt proved a fail#ure alice heard it say to it#self then i ll go round and get in at the win#dow that you won t thought alice and af#ter wait#ing till she fan#cied she heard the rab#bit just un#der the win#dow she sud#den#ly spread out her hand and made a snatch in the a#ir she did not get hold of an#y#thing but she heard a lit#tle shriek and a fall and a crash of bro#ken glass from which she con#clud#ed that it was just pos#si#ble it had fall#en in#to a cu#cum#ber frame or some#thing of the sort next came an an#gry voice the rab#bit s pat pat where are you and then a voice she had nev#er heard be#fore sure then i m he#re dig#ging for ap#ples yer hon#our dig#ging for ap#ples in#deed sa#id the rab#bit an#gri#ly he#re come and help me out of this sound#s of more bro#ken glass now tell me pat what s that in the win#dow sure it s an arm yer hon#our he pro#nounced it arrum an arm you goose who ev#er saw one that size why it fills the whole win#dow sure it does yer hon#our but it s an arm for all that well it s got no busi#ness there at an#y rate go and take it a#way there was a long si#lence af#ter this and alice could on#ly hear whispers now and then such as sure i don t like it yer hon#our at all at all do as i tell you you cow#ard and at last she spread out her hand a#gain and made an#oth#er snatch in the a#ir this time there were two lit#tle shrieks and more sound#s of bro#ken glass what a num#ber of cu#cum#ber frames there must be thought alice i won#der what they ll do next as for pulling me out of the win#dow i on#ly wish they could i m sure i don t want to stay in he#re an#y long#er she wait#ed for some time with#out hear#ing an#y#thing more at last came a rumbling of lit#tle cart#wheel#s and the sound of a good man#y voices all talk#ing to#geth#er she made out the words where s the oth#er lad#der why i hadn t to br#ing but one bill s got the oth#er bill fetch it he#re lad he#re put em up at this cor#ner no tie em to#geth#er first they don t reach half high e#nough yet oh they ll do well e#nough don t be par#tic#u#lar he#re bill catch hold of this rope will the roof bear mind that loose slate oh it s com#ing down heads be#low a loud crash now who did that it was bill i fan#cy who s to go down the chim#ney nay i shan t you do it that i won t then bill s to go down he#re bill the mas#ter say#s you re to go down the chim#ney oh so bill s got to come down the chim#ney has he sa#id alice to her#self shy they seem to put eve#ry#thing up#on bill i wouldn t be in bill s place for a good deal this fire#place i#s nar#row to be sure but i think i can kick a lit#tle she drew her foot as far down the chim#ney as she could and wait#ed till she heard a lit#tle an#i#mal she couldn t guess of what sort it was scratching and scrambling a#bout in the chim#ney close a#bove her then say#ing to her#self this i#s bill she gave one sharp kick and wait#ed to see what would hap#pen next the first thing she heard was a gen#er#al cho#rus of there goes bill then the rab#bit s voice a#long catch him you by the hedge then si#lence and then an#oth#er con#fu#sion of voices hold up his head bran#dy now don t choke him how was it old fel#low what hap#pened to you tell us all a#bout it last came a lit#tle fee#ble squeak#ing voice that s bill thought alice well i hard#ly know no more thank ye i m bet#ter now but i m a deal too flustered to tell you all i know i#s some#thing co#mes at me like a jack in the box and up i goes like a sky rock#et so you did old fel#low sa#id the others we must burn the house down sa#id the rab#bit s voice and alice called out as loud as she could if you do i ll set dinah at you there was a dead si#lence in#stant#ly and alice thought to her#self i won#der what they will do next if they had an#y sense they d take the roof off af#ter a mi#nute or two they be#gan mov#ing a#bout a#gain and alice heard the rab#bit say a bar#row#ful will do to be#gin with a bar#row#ful of what thought alice but she had not long to doubt for the next mo#ment a show#er of lit#tle pebbles came rat#tling in at the win#dow and some of them hit her in the face i ll put a stop to this she sa#id to her#self and shout#ed out you d bet#ter not do that a#gain which pro#duced an#oth#er dead si#lence alice no#ticed with some sur#prise that the pebbles were all turn#ing in#to lit#tle cakes as they lay on the floor and a bright i#de#a came in#to her head if i eat one of these cakes she thought it s sure to make some change in my size and as it can t pos#si#bly make me larg#er it must make me smaller i sup#pose so she swal#low#ed one of the cakes and was de#light#ed to find that she be#gan shrink#ing di#rect#ly as soon as she was small e#nough to get through the door she ran out of the house and found quite a crowd of lit#tle animals and bird#s wait#ing out#side the poor lit#tle liz#ard bill was in the mid#dle be#ing held up by two guin#ea pigs who were giv#ing it some#thing out of a bot#tle they all made a rush at alice the mo#ment she ap#pear#ed but she ran off as hard as she could and soon found her#self safe in a thick wood the first thing i ve got to do sa#id alice to her#self as she wand#ered a#bout in the wood i#s to grow to my right size a#gain and the se#cond thing i#s to find my way in#to that love#ly gar#den i think that will be the best plan it sound#ed an ex#cel#lent plan no doubt and ver#y neat#ly and sim#ply ar#ranged the on#ly dif#fi#cul#ty was that she had not the smallest i#de#a how to set a#bout it and while she was peer#ing a#bout anx#ious#ly a#mong the trees a lit#tle sharp bark just o#ver her head made her look up in a great hur#ry an e#nor#mous pup#py was look#ing down at her with large round eyes and fee#bly stretching out one paw try#ing to tou#ch her poor lit#tle thing sa#id alice in a co#ax#ing tone and she tried hard to whis#tle to it but she was ter#ri#bly fright#ened all the time at the thought that it might be hun#gry in which case it would be ver#y like#ly to eat her up in spite of all her co#ax#ing hard#ly know#ing what she did she pick#ed up a lit#tle bit of stick and held it out to the pup#py where#u#pon the pup#py jump#ed in#to the a#ir off all its feet at once with a yelp of de#light and rush#ed at the stick and made be#lieve to wor#ry it then alice dodged be#hind a great this#tle to keep her#self from be#ing run o#ver and the mo#ment she ap#pear#ed on the oth#er side the pup#py made an#oth#er rush at the stick and tumbled head o#ver heel#s in its hur#ry to get hold of it then alice think#ing it was ver#y like hav#ing a game of play with a cart horse and ex#pect#ing eve#ry mo#ment to be trampled un#der its feet ran round the this#tle a#gain then the pup#py be#gan a se#ries of short charges at the stick run#ning a ver#y lit#tle way for#wards each time and a long way back and bark#ing hoarse#ly all the while till at last it sat down a good way off pant#ing with its tongue hang#ing out of its mouth and its great eyes half shut this seem#ed to alice a good opportunity for mak#ing her es#cape so she set off at once and ran till she was quite tired and out of breath and till the pup#py s bark sound#ed quite faint in the dis#tance and yet what a dear lit#tle pup#py it was sa#id alice as she leant a#gainst a but#ter#cup to rest her#self and fan#ned her#self with one of the leaves i should have liked teach#ing it trick#s ver#y much if if i d on#ly been the right size to do it oh dear i d near#ly for#got#ten that i ve got to grow up a#gain let me see how i#s it to be man#aged i sup#pose i ought to eat or drink some#thing or oth#er but the great ques#tion i#s what the great ques#tion cer#tain#ly was what alice look#ed all round her at the flow#ers and the blades of grass but she did not see an#y#thing that look#ed like the right thing to eat or drink un#der the circumstances there was a large mush#room grow#ing near her a#bout the same height as her#self and when she had look#ed un#der it and on both sides of it and be#hind it it oc#curred to her that she might as well look and see what was on the top of it she stretched her#self up on tip#toe and peep#ed o#ver the edge of the mush#room and her eyes im#me#di#ate#ly met those of a large cat#er#pil#lar that was sit#ting on the top with its arms fold#ed qui#et#ly smo#king a long hook#ah and tak#ing not the smallest no#tice of her or of an#y#thing else chap#ter v ad#vice from a cat#er#pil#lar the cat#er#pil#lar and alice look#ed at each oth#er for some time in si#lence at last the cat#er#pil#lar took the hook#ah out of its mouth and ad#dress#ed her in a lan#guid sleep#y voice who are you sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar this was not an encouraging o#pen#ing for a con#ver#sa#tion alice re#ply#ed ra#ther shy#ly i i hard#ly know sir just at pre#sent at least i know who i was when i got up this morn#ing but i think i must have been changed sev#er#al times since then what do you mean by that sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar stern#ly ex#plain your#self i can t ex#plain my#self i m a#fraid sir sa#id alice be#cause i m not my#self you see i don t see sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar i m a#fraid i can t put it more clear#ly alice re#ply#ed ver#y po#lite#ly for i can t un#der#stand it my#self to be#gin with and be#ing so man#y dif#fer#ent sizes in a day i#s ver#y con#fus#ing it isn t sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar well per#haps you ha#ven t found it so yet sa#id alice but when you have to turn in#to a chrys#a#lis you will some day you know and then af#ter that in#to a but#ter#fly i should think you ll feel it a lit#tle queer won t you not a bit sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar well per#haps your feel#ings may be dif#fer#ent sa#id alice all i know i#s it would feel ver#y queer to me you sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar contemptuously who are you which brought them back a#gain to the be#gin#ning of the con#ver#sa#tion alice felt a lit#tle ir#ri#tat#ed at the cat#er#pil#lar s mak#ing such ver#y short re#mark#s and she drew her#self up and sa#id ver#y grave#ly i think you ought to tell me who you are first why sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar he#re was an#oth#er puzzling ques#tion and as alice could not think of an#y good rea#son and as the cat#er#pil#lar seem#ed to be in a ver#y un#pleas#ant state of mind she turn#ed a#way come back the cat#er#pil#lar called af#ter her i ve some#thing im#por#tant to say this sound#ed prom#is#ing cer#tain#ly alice turn#ed and came back a#gain keep your tem#per sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar i#s that all sa#id alice swal#low#ing down her an#ger as well as she could no sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar alice thought she might as well wait as she had noth#ing else to do and per#haps af#ter all it might tell her some#thing worth hear#ing for some min#utes it puff#ed a#way with#out speak#ing but at last it un#fold#ed its arms took the hook#ah out of its mouth a#gain and sa#id so you think you re changed do you i m a#fraid i a#m sir sa#id alice i can t re#mem#ber thing#s as i used and i don t keep the same size for ten min#utes to#geth#er can t re#mem#ber what thing#s sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar well i ve tried to say how doth the lit#tle bus#y bee but it all came dif#fer#ent alice re#ply#ed in a ver#y mel#an#chol#y voice re#peat you are old fa#ther wil#liam sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar alice fold#ed her hands and be#gan you are old fa#ther wil#liam the young man sa#id and your hair has be#come ver#y white and yet you incessantly stand on your head do you think at your age it i#s right in my youth fa#ther wil#liam re#ply#ed to his son i fear#ed it might in#jure the brain but now that i m per#fect#ly sure i have none why i do it a#gain and a#gain you are old sa#id the youth as i mentioned be#fore and have grown most un#com#mon#ly fat yet you turn#ed a back som#er#sault in at the door pray what i#s the rea#son of that in my youth sa#id the sage as he shook his grey lock#s i kept all my limb#s ver#y sup#ple by the use of this oint#ment one shil#ling the box al#low me to sell you a cou#ple you are old sa#id the youth and your jaws are too weak for an#y#thing tough#er than su#et yet you fin#ished the goose with the bon#es and the beak pray how did you man#age to do it in my youth sa#id his fa#ther i took to the law and ar#gued each case with my wife and the mus#cu#lar strength which it gave to my jaw has last#ed the rest of my life you are old sa#id the youth one would hard#ly sup#pose that your eye was as stead#y as ev#er yet you bal#anced an eel on the end of your nose what made you so aw#ful#ly clev#er i have answered three quest#ions and that i#s e#nough sa#id his fa#ther don t give your#self airs do you think i can lis#ten all day to such stuff be off or i ll kick you down stairs that i#s not sa#id right sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar not quite right i m a#fraid sa#id alice tim#id#ly some of the words have got altered it i#s wrong from be#gin#ning to end sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar de#cid#ed#ly and there was si#lence for some min#utes the cat#er#pil#lar was the first to speak what size do you want to be it ask#ed oh i m not par#tic#u#lar as to size alice hast#i#ly re#ply#ed on#ly one doesn t like chang#ing so of#ten you know i don t know sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar alice sa#id noth#ing she had nev#er been so much con#tra#dict#ed in her life be#fore and she felt that she was los#ing her tem#per are you con#tent now sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar well i should like to be a lit#tle larg#er sir if you wouldn t mind sa#id alice three inch#es i#s such a wretch#ed height to be it i#s a ver#y good height in#deed sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar an#gri#ly rear#ing it#self up#right as it spoke it was ex#act#ly three inch#es high but i m not used to it plead#ed poor alice in a pit#e#ous tone and she thought of her#self i wish the creatures wouldn t be so eas#i#ly of#fend#ed you ll get used to it in time sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar and it put the hook#ah in#to its mouth and be#gan smo#king a#gain this time alice wait#ed pa#tient#ly un#til it chose to speak a#gain in a mi#nute or two the cat#er#pil#lar took the hook#ah out of its mouth and yawn#ed once or twice and shook it#self then it got down off the mush#room and crawl#ed a#way in the grass mere#ly re#mark#ing as it went one side will make you grow taller and the oth#er side will make you grow short#er one side of what the oth#er side of what thought alice to her#self of the mush#room sa#id the cat#er#pil#lar just as if she had ask#ed it a#loud and in an#oth#er mo#ment it was out of sight alice re#main#ed look#ing thought#fully at the mush#room for a mi#nute try#ing to make out which were the two sides of it and as it was per#fect#ly round she found this a ver#y dif#fi#cult ques#tion how#ev#er at last she stretched her arms round it as far as they would go and broke off a bit of the edge with each hand and now which i#s which she sa#id to her#self and nibbled a lit#tle of the right hand bit to try the ef#fect the next mo#ment she felt a vi#o#lent b#low un#der#neath her chin it had struck her foot she was a good deal fright#ened by this ver#y sud#den change but she felt that there was no time to be lost as she was shrink#ing rap#id#ly so she set to work at once to eat some of the oth#er bit her chin was press#ed so close#ly a#gainst her foot that there was hard#ly room to o#pen her mouth but she did it at last and man#aged to swal#low a mor#sel of the lefthand bit come my head s free at last sa#id alice in a tone of de#light which changed in#to a#larm in an#oth#er mo#ment when she found that her should#ers were no#where to be found all she could see when she look#ed down was an im#mense length of neck which seem#ed to rise like a stalk out of a sea of green leaves that lay far be#low her what can all that green stuff be sa#id alice and where have my should#ers got to and oh my poor hands how i#s it i can t see you she was mov#ing them a#bout as she spoke but no re#sult seem#ed to fol#low ex#cept a lit#tle shak#ing a#mong the dis#tant green leaves as there seem#ed to be no chance of get#ting her hands up to her head she tried to get her head down to them and was de#light#ed to find that her neck would bend a#bout eas#i#ly in an#y di#rec#tion like a ser#pent she had just suc#cess#ed in curv#ing it down in#to a grace#ful zig#zag and was go#ing to dive in a#mong the leaves which she found to be noth#ing but the tops of the trees un#der which she had been wan#der#ing when a sharp hiss made her draw back in a hur#ry a large pi#geon had flown in#to her face and was beat#ing her vi#ol#ently with its wing#s ser#pent screamed the pi#geon i m not a ser#pent sa#id alice indignantly let me a#lone ser#pent i say a#gain re#peat#ed the pi#geon but in a more sub#dued tone and added with a kind of sob i ve tried eve#ry way and noth#ing seem#s to suit them i ha#ven t the least i#de#a what you re talk#ing a#bout sa#id alice i ve tried the root#s of trees and i ve tried banks and i ve tried hedges the pi#geon went on with#out at#tend#ing to her but those serpents there s no pleas#ing them alice was more and more puzzled but she thought there was no use in say#ing an#y#thing more till the pi#geon had fin#ished as if it wasn t trou#ble e#nough hatch#ing the eggs sa#id the pi#geon but i must be on the look out for serpents night and day why i ha#ven t had a wink of sleep these three week#s i m ver#y sor#ry you ve been an#noy#ed sa#id alice who was be#gin#ning to see its mean#ing and just as i d tak#en the highest tree in the wood con#tin#ued the pi#geon rais#ing its voice to a shriek and just as i was think#ing i should be free of them at last they must needs come wriggling down from the sky ugh ser#pent but i m not a ser#pent i tell you sa#id alice i m a i m a well what are you sa#id the pi#geon i can see you re try#ing to in#vent some#thing i i m a lit#tle girl sa#id alice ra#ther doubt#ful#ly as she remembered the num#ber of changes she had gone through that day a like#ly sto#ry in#deed sa#id the pi#geon in a tone of the deepest con#tempt i ve seen a good man#y lit#tle girl#s in my time but nev#er one with such a neck as that no no you re a ser#pent and there s no use de#ny#ing it i sup#pose you ll be tell#ing me next that you nev#er tast#ed an egg i have tast#ed eggs cer#tain#ly sa#id alice who was a ver#y truth#ful child but lit#tle girl#s eat eggs quite as much as serpents do you know i don t be#lieve it sa#id the pi#geon but if they do why then they re a kind of ser#pent that s all i can say this was such a new i#de#a to alice that she was quite si#lent for a mi#nute or two which gave the pi#geon the opportunity of adding you re look#ing for eggs i know that well e#nough and what does it mat#ter to me wheth#er you re a lit#tle girl or a ser#pent it mat#ters a good deal to me sa#id alice hast#i#ly but i m not look#ing for eggs as it hap#pens and if i was i shouldn t want yours i don t like them raw well be off then sa#id the pi#geon in a sulk#y tone as it settled down a#gain in#to its nest alice crouch#ed down a#mong the trees as well as she could for her neck kept get#ting entangled a#mong the branch#es and eve#ry now and then she had to stop and untwist it af#ter a while she remembered that she still held the pieces of mush#room in her hands and she set to work ver#y care#ful#ly nibbling first at one and then at the oth#er and grow#ing some#times taller and some#times short#er un#til she had suc#cess#ed in bring#ing her#self down to her u#su#al height it was so long since she had been an#y#thing near the right size that it felt quite strange at first but she got used to it in a few min#utes and be#gan talk#ing to her#self as u#su#al come there s half my plan done now how puzzling all these changes are i m nev#er sure what i m go#ing to be from one mi#nute to an#oth#er how#ev#er i ve got back to my right size the next thing i#s to get in#to that beau#ti#ful gar#den how i#s that to be done i won#der as she sa#id this she came sud#den#ly up#on an o#pen place with a lit#tle house in it a#bout four feet high who#ev#er lives there thought alice it ll nev#er do to come up#on them this size why i should fright#en them out of their wits so she be#gan nibbling at the righthand bit a#gain and did not ven#ture to go near the house till she had brought her#self down to nine inch#es high chap#ter vi pig and pep#per for a mi#nute or two she stood look#ing at the house and won#der#ing what to do next when sud#den#ly a foot#man in liv#er#y came run#ning out of the wood she con#sid#ered him to be a foot#man be#cause he was in liv#er#y oth#er#wise judg#ing by his face on#ly she would have called him a fish and rap#ped loud#ly at the door with his knuckles it was opened by an#oth#er foot#man in liv#er#y with a round face and large eyes like a frog and both footmen alice no#ticed had powdered hair that curl#ed all o#ver their heads she felt ver#y cu#ri#ous to know what it was all a#bout and crept a lit#tle way out of the wood to lis#ten the fish foot#man be#gan by pro#duc#ing from un#der his arm a great let#ter near#ly as large as him#self and this he hand#ed o#ver to the oth#er say#ing in a sol#emn tone for the duch#ess an in#vi#ta#tion from the queen to play cro#quet the frog foot#man re#peat#ed in the same sol#emn tone on#ly chang#ing the or#der of the words a lit#tle from the queen an in#vi#ta#tion for the duch#ess to play cro#quet then they both bow#ed low and their curl#s got entangled to#geth#er alice laugh#ed so much at this that she had to run back in#to the wood for fear of their hear#ing her and when she next peep#ed out the fish foot#man was gone and the oth#er was sit#ting on the ground near the door star#ing stu#pid#ly up in#to the sky alice went tim#id#ly up to the door and knock#ed there s no sort of use in knock#ing sa#id the foot#man and that for two rea#son#s first be#cause i m on the same side of the door as you are sec#ond#ly be#cause they re mak#ing such a noise in#side no one could pos#si#bly hear you and cer#tain#ly there was a most ex#traor#di#nar#y noise go#ing on with#in a con#stant howl#ing and sneez#ing and eve#ry now and then a great crash as if a dish or ket#tle had been bro#ken to pieces please then sa#id alice how a#m i to get in there might be some sense in your knock#ing the foot#man went on with#out at#tend#ing to her if we had the door be#tween us for in#stance if you were in#side you might knock and i could let you out you know he was look#ing up in#to the sky all the time he was speak#ing and this alice thought de#cid#ed#ly un#civ#il but per#haps he can t help it she sa#id to her#self his eyes are so ver#y near#ly at the top of his head but at an#y rate he might an#swer quest#ions how a#m i to get in she re#peat#ed a#loud i shall sit he#re the foot#man re#mark#ed till to#mor#row at this mo#ment the door of the house opened and a large plate came skim#ming out straight at the foot#man s head it just grazed his nose and broke to pieces a#gainst one of the trees be#hind him or next day may#be the foot#man con#tin#ued in the same tone ex#act#ly as if noth#ing had hap#pened how a#m i to get in ask#ed alice a#gain in a loud#er tone are you to get in at all sa#id the foot#man that s the first ques#tion you know it was no doubt on#ly alice did not like to be told so it s re#al#ly dread#ful she muttered to her#self the way all the creatures ar#gue it s e#nough to drive one cra#zy the foot#man seem#ed to think this a good opportunity for rep#eating his re#mark with var#y#ations i shall sit he#re he sa#id on and off for days and days but what a#m i to do sa#id alice an#y#thing you like sa#id the foot#man and be#gan whis#tling oh there s no use in talk#ing to him sa#id alice desperately he s per#fect#ly id#i#ot#ic and she opened the door and went in the door led right in#to a large kitch#en which was full of smoke from one end to the oth#er the duch#ess was sit#ting on a three leg#ged stool in the mid#dle nursing a ba#by the cook was lean#ing o#ver the fire stir#ring a large caul#dron which seem#ed to be full of soup there s cer#tain#ly too much pep#per in that soup alice sa#id to her#self as well as she could for sneez#ing there was cer#tain#ly too much of it in the a#ir e#ven the duch#ess sneezed occasionally and as for the ba#by it was sneez#ing and howl#ing alternately with#out a mo#ment s pause the on#ly thing#s in the kitch#en that did not sneeze were the cook and a large cat which was sit#ting on the hearth and grin#ning from ear to ear please would you tell me sa#id alice a lit#tle tim#id#ly for she was not quite sure wheth#er it was good man#ners for her to speak first why your cat grin#s like that it s a chesh#ire cat sa#id the duch#ess and that s why pig she sa#id the last word with such sud#den vi#o#lence that alice quite jump#ed but she saw in an#oth#er mo#ment that it was ad#dress#ed to the ba#by and not to her so she took cour#age and went on a#gain i didn t know that chesh#ire cat#s al#ways grin#ned in fact i didn t know that cat#s could grin they all can sa#id the duch#ess and most of em do i don t know of an#y that do alice sa#id ver#y po#lite#ly feel#ing quite pleas#ed to have got in#to a con#ver#sa#tion you don t know much sa#id the duch#ess and that s a fact alice did not at all like the tone of this re#mark and thought it would be as well to in#tro#duce some oth#er sub#ject of con#ver#sa#tion while she was try#ing to fix on one the cook took the caul#dron of soup off the fire and at once set to work throwing eve#ry#thing with#in her reach at the duch#ess and the ba#by the fire i#rons came first then fol#low#ed a show#er of saucepans plat#es and dish#es the duch#ess took no no#tice of them e#ven when they hit her and the ba#by was howl#ing so much al#read#y that it was quite im#pos#si#ble to say wheth#er the b#low#s hurt it or not oh please mind what you re do#ing cried alice jump#ing up and down in an ag#o#ny of ter#ror oh there goes his pre#cious nose as an un#u#su#al#ly large sauce#pan flew close by it and ver#y near#ly car#ried it off if eve#ry#bod#y mind#ed their own busi#ness the duch#ess sa#id in a hoarse growl the world would go round a deal fast#er than it does which would not be an ad#van#tage sa#id alice who felt ver#y glad to get an opportunity of show#ing off a lit#tle of her knowl#edge just think of what work it would make with the day and night you see the earth takes twen#ty four hours to turn round on its ax#is talk#ing of ax#es sa#id the duch#ess chop off her head alice glanced ra#ther anx#ious#ly at the cook to see if she meant to take the hint but the cook was bus#i#ly stir#ring the soup and seem#ed not to be list#ening so she went on a#gain twen#ty four hours i think or i#s it twelve i oh don t both#er me sa#id the duch#ess i nev#er could a#bide fig#ures and with that she be#gan nursing her child a#gain sing#ing a sort of lull#a#by to it as she did so and giv#ing it a vi#o#lent shake at the end of eve#ry line speak rough#ly to your lit#tle boy and beat him when he sneezes he on#ly does it to an#noy be#cause he know#s it teases cho#rus in which the cook and the ba#by join#ed wow wow wow while the duch#ess sang the se#cond verse of the song she kept toss#ing the ba#by vi#ol#ently up and down and the poor lit#tle thing howl#ed so that alice could hard#ly hear the words i speak se#vere#ly to my boy i beat him when he sneezes for he can thor#ough#ly en#joy the pep#per when he pleas#es cho#rus wow wow wow he#re you may nurse it a bit if you like the duch#ess sa#id to alice fling#ing the ba#by at her as she spoke i must go and get read#y to play cro#quet with the queen and she hur#ried out of the room the cook threw a fry#ing pan af#ter her as she went out but it just miss#ed her alice caught the ba#by with some dif#fi#cul#ty as it was a queer shaped lit#tle crea#ture and held out its arms and leg#s in all di#rec#tions just like a star fish thought alice the poor lit#tle thing was snort#ing like a steam en#gine when she caught it and kept dou#bling it#self up and straightening it#self out a#gain so that al#to#geth#er for the first mi#nute or two it was as much as she could do to hold it as soon as she had made out the prop#er way of nursing it which was to twist it up in#to a sort of knot and then keep tight hold of its right ear and left foot so as to pre#vent its un#do#ing it#self she car#ried it out in#to the o#pen a#ir if i don t take this child a#way with me thought alice they re sure to kill it in a day or two wouldn t it be mur#der to leave it be#hind she sa#id the last words out loud and the lit#tle thing grunt#ed in re#ply it had left off sneez#ing by this time don t grunt sa#id alice that s not at all a prop#er way of ex#press#ing your#self the ba#by grunt#ed a#gain and alice look#ed ver#y anx#ious#ly in#to its face to see what was the mat#ter with it there could be no doubt that it had a ver#y turn up nose much more like a snout than a re#al nose al#so its eyes were get#ting ex#treme#ly small for a ba#by al#to#geth#er alice did not like the look of the thing at all but per#haps it was on#ly sob#bing she thought and look#ed in#to its eyes a#gain to see if there were an#y tears no there were no tears if you re go#ing to turn in#to a pig my dear sa#id alice se#ri#ous#ly i ll have noth#ing more to do with you mind now the poor lit#tle thing sob#bed a#gain or grunt#ed it was im#pos#si#ble to say which and they went on for some while in si#lence alice was just be#gin#ning to think to her#self now what a#m i to do with this crea#ture when i get it home when it grunt#ed a#gain so vi#ol#ently that she look#ed down in#to its face in some a#larm this time there could be no mis#take a#bout it it was nei#ther more nor less than a pig and she felt that it would be quite ab#surd for her to car#ry it fur#ther so she set the lit#tle crea#ture down and felt quite re#lieved to see it trot a#way qui#et#ly in#to the wood if it had grown up she sa#id to her#self it would have made a dread#ful#ly ug#ly child but it makes ra#ther a hand#some pig i think and she be#gan think#ing o#ver oth#er chil#dren she knew who might do ver#y well as pigs and was just say#ing to her#self if one on#ly knew the right way to change them when she was a lit#tle startled by see#ing the chesh#ire cat sit#ting on a bough of a tree a few yard#s off the cat on#ly grin#ned when it saw alice it look#ed good natured she thought still it had ver#y long claw#s and a great man#y teeth so she felt that it ought to be treated with re#spect chesh#ire puss she be#gan ra#ther tim#id#ly as she did not at all know wheth#er it would like the name how#ev#er it on#ly grin#ned a lit#tle wid#er come it s pleas#ed so far thought alice and she went on would you tell me please which way i ought to go from he#re that de#pend#s a good deal on where you want to get to sa#id the cat i don t much care where sa#id alice then it doesn t mat#ter which way you go sa#id the cat so long as i get some#where alice added as an ex#pla#na#tion oh you re sure to do that sa#id the cat if you on#ly walk long e#nough alice felt that this could not be de#nied so she tried an#oth#er ques#tion what sort of peo#ple live a#bout he#re in that di#rec#tion the cat sa#id wav#ing its right paw round lives a hat#ter and in that di#rec#tion wav#ing the oth#er paw lives a march hare vis#it ei#ther you like they re both mad but i don t want to go a#mong mad peo#ple alice re#mark#ed oh you can t help that sa#id the cat we re all mad he#re i m mad you re mad how do you know i m mad sa#id alice you must be sa#id the cat or you wouldn t have come he#re alice didn t think that proved it at all how#ev#er she went on and how do you know that you re mad to be#gin with sa#id the cat a dog s not mad you grant that i sup#pose so sa#id alice well then the cat went on you see a dog growl#s when it s an#gry and wag#s its tail when it s pleas#ed now i growl when i m pleas#ed and wag my tail when i m an#gry there#fore i m mad i call it purring not growl#ing sa#id alice call it what you like sa#id the cat do you play cro#quet with the queen to day i should like it ver#y much sa#id alice but i ha#ven t been in#vit#ed yet you ll see me there sa#id the cat and van#ished alice was not much sur#prised at this she was get#ting so used to queer thing#s hap#pen#ing while she was look#ing at the place where it had been it sud#den#ly ap#pear#ed a#gain by the bye what be#came of the ba#by sa#id the cat i d near#ly for#got#ten to ask it turn#ed in#to a pig alice qui#et#ly sa#id just as if it had come back in a nat#u#ral way i thought it would sa#id the cat and van#ished a#gain alice wait#ed a lit#tle half ex#pect#ing to see it a#gain but it did not ap#pear and af#ter a mi#nute or two she walk#ed on in the di#rec#tion in which the march hare was sa#id to live i ve seen hat#ters be#fore she sa#id to her#self the march hare will be much the most in#ter#est#ing and per#haps as this i#s may it won t be rav#ing mad at least not so mad as it was in march as she sa#id this she look#ed up and there was the cat a#gain sit#ting on a branch of a tree did you say pig or fig sa#id the cat i sa#id pig re#ply#ed alice and i wish you wouldn t keep ap#pear#ing and van#ishing so sud#den#ly you make one quite gid#dy all right sa#id the cat and this time it van#ished quite slow#ly be#gin#ning with the end of the tail and end#ing with the grin which re#main#ed some time af#ter the rest of it had gone well i ve of#ten seen a cat with#out a grin thought alice but a grin with#out a cat it s the most cu#ri#ous thing i ev#er saw in my life she had not gone much far#ther be#fore she came in sight of the house of the march hare she thought it must be the right house be#cause the chim#ney#s were shaped like ear#s and the roof was thatch#ed with fur it was so large a house that she did not like to go near#er till she had nibbled some more of the lefthand bit of mush#room and raised her#self to a#bout two feet high e#ven then she walk#ed up to#ward#s it ra#ther tim#id#ly say#ing to her#self sup#pose it should be rav#ing mad af#ter all i al#most wish i d gone to see the hat#ter in#stead chap#ter vii a mad tea par#ty there was a ta#ble set out un#der a tree in front of the house and the march hare and the hat#ter were hav#ing tea at it a dor#mouse was sit#ting be#tween them fast a#sleep and the oth#er two were us#ing it as a cush#ion re#sting their el#bow#s on it and talk#ing o#ver its head ver#y uncomfortable for the dor#mouse thought alice on#ly as it s a#sleep i sup#pose it doesn t mind the ta#ble was a large one but the three were all crowd#ed to#geth#er at one cor#ner of it no room no room they cried out when they saw alice com#ing there s plen#ty of room sa#id alice indignantly and she sat down in a large arm chair at one end of the ta#ble have some wine the march hare sa#id in an encouraging tone alice look#ed all round the ta#ble but there was noth#ing on it but tea i don t see an#y wine she re#mark#ed there isn t an#y sa#id the march hare then it wasn t ver#y civ#il of you to of#fer it sa#id alice an#gri#ly it wasn t ver#y civ#il of you to sit down with#out be#ing in#vit#ed sa#id the march hare i didn t know it was your ta#ble sa#id alice it s laid for a great man#y more than three your hair want#s cut#ting sa#id the hat#ter he had been look#ing at alice for some time with great cu#ri#os#i#ty and this was his first speech you should learn not to make per#son#al re#mark#s alice sa#id with some se#ver#i#ty it s ver#y rude the hat#ter opened his eyes ver#y wide on hear#ing this but all he sa#id was why i#s a ra#ven like a writ#ing desk come we shall have some fun now thought alice i m glad they ve be#gun ask#ing riddles i be#lieve i can guess that she added a#loud do you mean that you think you can find out the an#swer to it sa#id the march hare ex#act#ly so sa#id alice then you should say what you mean the march hare went on i do alice hast#i#ly re#ply#ed at least at least i mean what i say that s the same thing you know not the same thing a bit sa#id the hat#ter you might just as well say that i see what i eat i#s the same thing as i eat what i see you might just as well say added the march hare that i like what i get i#s the same thing as i get what i like you might just as well say added the dor#mouse who seem#ed to be talk#ing in his sleep that i breathe when i sleep i#s the same thing as i sleep when i breathe it i#s the same thing with you sa#id the hat#ter and he#re the con#ver#sa#tion drop#ped and the par#ty sat si#lent for a mi#nute while alice thought o#ver all she could re#mem#ber a#bout ravens and writ#ing desk#s which wasn t much the hat#ter was the first to break the si#lence what day of the month i#s it he sa#id turn#ing to alice he had tak#en his watch out of his pock#et and was look#ing at it un#eas#i#ly shak#ing it eve#ry now and then and hold#ing it to his ear alice con#sid#ered a lit#tle and then sa#id the fourth two days wrong sigh#ed the hat#ter i told you but#ter wouldn t suit the works he added look#ing an#gri#ly at the march hare it was the best but#ter the march hare meek#ly re#ply#ed yes but some crumbs must have got in as well the hat#ter grumbled you shouldn t have put it in with the bread knife the march hare took the watch and look#ed at it gloom#i#ly then he dip#ped it in#to his cup of tea and look#ed at it a#gain but he could think of noth#ing bet#ter to say than his first re#mark it was the best but#ter you know alice had been look#ing o#ver his shoul#der with some cu#ri#os#i#ty what a fun#ny watch she re#mark#ed it tells the day of the month and doesn t tell what o clock it i#s why should it muttered the hat#ter does your watch tell you what year it i#s of course not alice re#ply#ed ver#y read#i#ly but that s be#cause it stays the same year for such a long time to#geth#er which i#s just the case with mine sa#id the hat#ter alice felt dread#ful#ly puzzled the hat#ter s re#mark seem#ed to have no sort of mean#ing in it and yet it was cer#tain#ly eng#lish i don t quite un#der#stand you she sa#id as po#lite#ly as she could the dor#mouse i#s a#sleep a#gain sa#id the hat#ter and he pour#ed a lit#tle hot tea up#on its nose the dor#mouse shook its head impatiently and sa#id with#out o#pen#ing its eyes of course of course just what i was go#ing to re#mark my#self have you guess#ed the rid#dle yet the hat#ter sa#id turn#ing to alice a#gain no i give it up alice re#ply#ed what s the an#swer i ha#ven t the slightest i#de#a sa#id the hat#ter nor i sa#id the march hare alice sigh#ed wea#ri#ly i think you might do some#thing bet#ter with the time she sa#id than waste it in ask#ing riddles that have no answers if you knew time as well as i do sa#id the hat#ter you wouldn t talk a#bout wast#ing it it s him i don t know what you mean sa#id alice of course you don t the hat#ter sa#id toss#ing his head contemptuously i dare say you nev#er e#ven spoke to time per#haps not alice cau#tious#ly re#ply#ed but i know i have to beat time when i learn mu#sic ah that ac#count#s for it sa#id the hat#ter he won t stand beat#ing now if you on#ly kept on good terms with him he d do al#most an#y#thing you liked with the clock for in#stance sup#pose it were nine o clock in the morn#ing just time to be#gin les#son#s you d on#ly have to whis#per a hint to time and round goes the clock in a twin#kling half past one time for din#ner i on#ly wish it was the march hare sa#id to it#self in a whis#per that would be grand cer#tain#ly sa#id alice thought#fully but then i shouldn t be hun#gry for it you know not at first per#haps sa#id the hat#ter but you could keep it to half past one as long as you liked i#s that the way you man#age alice ask#ed the hat#ter shook his head mourn#fully not i he re#ply#ed we quar#relled last march just be#fore he went mad you know point#ing with his tea spoon at the march hare it was at the great con#cert giv#en by the queen of hearts and i had to sing twin#kle twin#kle lit#tle bat how i won#der what you re at you know the song per#haps i ve heard some#thing like it sa#id alice it goes on you know the hat#ter con#tin#ued in this way up a#bove the world you fly like a tea tray in the sky twin#kle twin#kle he#re the dor#mouse shook it#self and be#gan sing#ing in its sleep twin#kle twin#kle twin#kle twin#kle and went on so long that they had to pinch it to make it stop well i d hard#ly fin#ished the first verse sa#id the hat#ter when the queen jump#ed up and bawl#ed out he s murdering the time off with his head how dread#ful#ly sav#age ex#claim#ed alice and ev#er since that the hat#ter went on in a mourn#ful tone he won t do a thing i ask it s al#ways six o clock now a bright i#de#a came in#to alice s head i#s that the rea#son so man#y tea thing#s are put out he#re she ask#ed yes that s it sa#id the hat#ter with a sigh it s al#ways tea time and we ve no time to wash the thing#s be#tween whiles then you keep mov#ing round i sup#pose sa#id alice ex#act#ly so sa#id the hat#ter as the thing#s get used up but what hap#pens when you come to the be#gin#ning a#gain alice ven#tured to ask sup#pose we change the sub#ject the march hare in#ter#rupt#ed yawn#ing i m get#ting tired of this i vote the young la#dy tells us a sto#ry i m a#fraid i don t know one sa#id alice ra#ther a#larm#ed at the pro#po#sal then the dor#mouse shall they both cried wake up dor#mouse and they pinch#ed it on both sides at once the dor#mouse slow#ly opened his eyes i wasn t a#sleep he sa#id in a hoarse fee#ble voice i heard eve#ry word you fel#low#s were say#ing tell us a sto#ry sa#id the march hare yes please do plead#ed alice and be quick a#bout it added the hat#ter or you ll be a#sleep a#gain be#fore it s done once up#on a time there were three lit#tle sisters the dor#mouse be#gan in a great hur#ry and their names were elsie la#cy#e and tillie and they lived at the bot#tom of a well what did they live on sa#id alice who al#ways took a great in#ter#est in quest#ions of eat#ing and drink#ing they lived on treacle sa#id the dor#mouse af#ter think#ing a mi#nute or two they couldn t have done that you know alice gen#tly re#mark#ed they d have been ill so they were sa#id the dor#mouse ver#y ill alice tried to fan#cy to her#self what such an ex#traor#di#nar#y ways of liv#ing would be like but it puzzled her too much so she went on but why did they live at the bot#tom of a well take some more tea the march hare sa#id to alice ver#y ear#nest#ly i ve had noth#ing yet alice re#ply#ed in an of#fend#ed tone so i can t take more you mean you can t take less sa#id the hat#ter it s ver#y eas#y to take more than noth#ing no#bod#y ask#ed your o#pin#ion sa#id alice who s mak#ing per#son#al re#mark#s now the hat#ter ask#ed tri#umph#antly alice did not quite know what to say to this so she help#ed her#self to some tea and bread and but#ter and then turn#ed to the dor#mouse and re#peat#ed her ques#tion why did they live at the bot#tom of a well the dor#mouse a#gain took a mi#nute or two to think a#bout it and then sa#id it was a treacle well there s no such thing alice was be#gin#ning ver#y an#gri#ly but the hat#ter and the march hare went sh sh and the dor#mouse sulk#y#ly re#mark#ed if you can t be civ#il you d bet#ter fin#ish the sto#ry for your#self no please go on alice sa#id ver#y hum#bly i won t in#ter#rupt a#gain i dare say there may be one one in#deed sa#id the dor#mouse indignantly how#ev#er he cons#ented to go on and so these three lit#tle sisters they were learn#ing to draw you know what did they draw sa#id alice quite for#get#ting her prom#ise treacle sa#id the dor#mouse with#out considering at all this time i want a clean cup in#ter#rupt#ed the hat#ter let s all move one place on he moved on as he spoke and the dor#mouse fol#low#ed him the march hare moved in#to the dor#mouse s place and alice ra#ther unwillingly took the place of the march hare the hat#ter was the on#ly one who got an#y ad#van#tage from the change and alice was a good deal worse off than be#fore as the march hare had just up#set the milk jug in#to his plate alice did not wish to of#fend the dor#mouse a#gain so she be#gan ver#y cau#tious#ly but i don t un#der#stand where did they draw the treacle from you can draw wa#ter out of a wa#ter well sa#id the hat#ter so i should think you could draw treacle out of a treacle well eh stu#pid but they were in the well alice sa#id to the dor#mouse not choosing to no#tice this last re#mark of course they were sa#id the dor#mouse well in this an#swer so con#fused poor alice that she let the dor#mouse go on for some time with#out in#ter#rupt#ing it they were learn#ing to draw the dor#mouse went on yawn#ing and rub#bing its eyes for it was get#ting ver#y sleep#y and they drew all man#ner of thing#s eve#ry#thing that be#gin#s with an m why with an m sa#id alice why not sa#id the march hare alice was si#lent the dor#mouse had closed its eyes by this time and was go#ing off in#to a doze but on be#ing pinch#ed by the hat#ter it woke up a#gain with a lit#tle shriek and went on that be#gin#s with an m such as mouse traps and the moon and mem#o#ry and much#ness you know you say thing#s are much of a much#ness did you ev#er see such a thing as a draw#ing of a much#ness re#al#ly now you ask me sa#id alice ver#y much con#fused i don t think then you shouldn t talk sa#id the hat#ter this piece of rude#ness was more than alice could bear she got up in great dis#gust and walk#ed off the dor#mouse fell a#sleep in#stant#ly and nei#ther of the others took the least no#tice of her go#ing though she look#ed back once or twice half hop#ing that they would call af#ter her the last time she saw them they were try#ing to put the dor#mouse in#to the tea#pot at an#y rate i ll nev#er go there a#gain sa#id alice as she pick#ed her way through the wood it s the stupidest tea par#ty i ev#er was at in all my life just as she sa#id this she no#ticed that one of the trees had a door lead#ing right in#to it that s ver#y cu#ri#ous she thought but eve#ry#thing s cu#ri#ous to#day i think i may as well go in at once and in she went once more she found her#self in the long hall and close to the lit#tle glass ta#ble now i ll man#age bet#ter this time she sa#id to her#self and be#gan by tak#ing the lit#tle gold#en key and un#lock#ing the door that led in#to the gar#den then she went to work nibbling at the mush#room she had kept a piece of it in her pock#et till she was a#bout a foot high then she walk#ed down the lit#tle pas#sage and then she found her#self at last in the beau#ti#ful gar#den a#mong the bright flow#er beds and the cool foun#tain#s chap#ter viii the queen s cro#quet ground a large rose tree stood near the en#trance of the gar#den the roses grow#ing on it were white but there were three gardeners at it bus#i#ly paint#ing them red alice thought this a ver#y cu#ri#ous thing and she went near#er to watch them and just as she came up to them she heard one of them say look out now five don t go splashing paint o#ver me like that i couldn t help it sa#id five in a sulk#y tone sev#en jog#ged my el#bow on which sev#en look#ed up and sa#id that s right five al#ways lay the blame on others you d bet#ter not talk sa#id five i heard the queen say on#ly yes#ter#day you de#served to be be#head#ed what for sa#id the one who had spo#ken first that s none of your busi#ness two sa#id sev#en yes it i#s his busi#ness sa#id five and i ll tell him it was for bring#ing the cook tu#lip root#s in#stead of on#ions sev#en flung down his brush and had just be#gun well of all the un#just thing#s when his eye chant#ed to fall up#on alice as she stood watch#ing them and he checked him#self sud#den#ly the others look#ed round al#so and all of them bow#ed low would you tell me sa#id alice a lit#tle tim#id#ly why you are paint#ing those roses five and sev#en sa#id noth#ing but look#ed at two two be#gan in a low voice why the fact i#s you see miss this he#re ought to have been a red rose tree and we put a white one in by mis#take and if the queen was to find it out we should all have our heads cut off you know so you see miss we re do#ing our best afore she co#mes to at this mo#ment five who had been anx#ious#ly look#ing a#cross the gar#den called out the queen the queen and the three gardeners in#stant#ly threw them#selves flat up#on their faces there was a sound of man#y foot#step#s and alice look#ed round ea#ger to see the queen first came ten soldiers car#ry#ing club#s these were all shaped like the three gardeners ob#long and flat with their hands and feet at the corn#ers next the ten courtiers these were or#na#ment#ed all o#ver with di#a#mond#s and walk#ed two and two as the soldiers did af#ter these came the roy#al chil#dren there were ten of them and the lit#tle dear#s came jump#ing mer#ri#ly a#long hand in hand in couples they were all or#na#ment#ed with hearts next came the guest#s most#ly kings and queens and a#mong them alice recognised the white rab#bit it was talk#ing in a hur#ried nerv#ous man#ner smil#ing at eve#ry#thing that was sa#id and went by with#out no#tic#ing her then fol#low#ed the knave of hearts car#ry#ing the king s crown on a crim#son vel#vet cush#ion and last of all this grand pro#ces#sion came the king and queen of hearts alice was ra#ther doubt#ful wheth#er she ought not to lie down on her face like the three gardeners but she could not re#mem#ber ev#er hav#ing heard of such a rule at pro#cess#ions and be#sides what would be the use of a pro#ces#sion thought she if peo#ple had all to lie down up#on their faces so that they couldn t see it so she stood still where she was and wait#ed when the pro#ces#sion came op#po#site to alice they all stopped and look#ed at her and the queen sa#id se#vere#ly who i#s this she sa#id it to the knave of hearts who on#ly bow#ed and smiled in re#ply id#i#ot sa#id the queen toss#ing her head impatiently and turn#ing to alice she went on what s your name child my name i#s alice so please your maj#es#ty sa#id alice ver#y po#lite#ly but she added to her#self why they re on#ly a pack of cards af#ter all i needn t be a#fraid of them and who are these sa#id the queen point#ing to the three gardeners who were ly#ing round the rosetree for you see as they were ly#ing on their faces and the pat#tern on their backs was the same as the rest of the pack she could not tell wheth#er they were gardeners or soldiers or courtiers or three of her own chil#dren how should i know sa#id alice sur#prised at her own cour#age it s no busi#ness of mine the queen turn#ed crim#son with fu#ry and af#ter glar#ing at her for a mo#ment like a wild beast screamed off with her head off non#sense sa#id alice ver#y loud#ly and de#cid#ed#ly and the queen was si#lent the king laid his hand up#on her arm and tim#id#ly sa#id con#sid#er my dear she i#s on#ly a child the queen turn#ed an#gri#ly a#way from him and sa#id to the knave turn them o#ver the knave did so ver#y care#ful#ly with one foot get up sa#id the queen in a shrill loud voice and the three gardeners in#stant#ly jump#ed up and be#gan bow#ing to the king the queen the roy#al chil#dren and eve#ry#bod#y else leave off that screamed the queen you make me gid#dy and then turn#ing to the rose tree she went on what have you been do#ing he#re may it please your maj#es#ty sa#id two in a ver#y hum#ble tone go#ing down on one knee as he spoke we were try#ing i see sa#id the queen who had mean#while been ex#am#in#ing the roses off with their heads and the pro#ces#sion moved on three of the soldiers re#main#ing be#hind to ex#e#cute the un#for#tu#nate gardeners who ran to alice for pro#tec#tion you shan t be be#head#ed sa#id alice and she put them in#to a large flow#er pot that stood near the three soldiers wand#ered a#bout for a mi#nute or two look#ing for them and then qui#et#ly march#ed off af#ter the others are their heads off shout#ed the queen their heads are gone if it please your maj#es#ty the soldiers shout#ed in re#ply that s right shout#ed the queen can you play cro#quet the soldiers were si#lent and look#ed at alice as the ques#tion was ev#i#dent#ly meant for her yes shout#ed alice come on then roar#ed the queen and alice join#ed the pro#ces#sion won#der#ing ver#y much what would hap#pen next it s it s a ver#y fi#ne day sa#id a tim#id voice at her side she was walk#ing by the white rab#bit who was peep#ing anx#ious#ly in#to her face ver#y sa#id alice where s the duch#ess hush hush sa#id the rab#bit in a low hur#ried tone he look#ed anx#ious#ly o#ver his shoul#der as he spoke and then raised him#self up#on tip#toe put his mouth close to her ear and whispered she s un#der sen#tence of ex#e#cu#tion what for sa#id alice did you say what a pit#y the rab#bit ask#ed no i didn t sa#id alice i don t think it s at all a pit#y i sa#id what for she box#ed the queen s ear#s the rab#bit be#gan alice gave a lit#tle scream of laugh#ter oh hush the rab#bit whispered in a fright#ened tone the queen will hear you you see she came ra#ther late and the queen sa#id get to your places shout#ed the queen in a voice of thun#der and peo#ple be#gan run#ning a#bout in all di#rec#tions tum#bling up a#gainst each oth#er how#ev#er they got settled down in a mi#nute or two and the game be#gan alice thought she had nev#er seen such a cu#ri#ous cro#quet ground in her life it was all ridges and fur#row#s the balls were live hedge#hog#s the mal#let#s live fla#min#go#es and the soldiers had to dou#ble them#selves up and to stand on their hands and feet to make the arch#es the chief dif#fi#cul#ty alice found at first was in man#ag#ing her fla#min#go she suc#cess#ed in get#ting its bod#y tuck#ed a#way com#fort#ably e#nough un#der her arm with its leg#s hang#ing down but gen#er#al#ly just as she had got its neck nice#ly straightened out and was go#ing to give the hedge#hog a b#low with its head it would twist it#self round and look up in her face with such a puzzled ex#pres#sion that she could not help burst#ing out laugh#ing and when she had got its head down and was go#ing to be#gin a#gain it was ver#y pro#vok#ing to find that the hedge#hog had unrolled it#self and was in the act of crawl#ing a#way be#sides all this there was gen#er#al#ly a ridge or fur#row in the way wher#ev#er she want#ed to send the hedge#hog to and as the doubled up soldiers were al#ways get#ting up and walk#ing off to oth#er parts of the ground alice soon came to the con#clu#sion that it was a ver#y dif#fi#cult game in#deed the play#ers all play#ed at once with#out wait#ing for turn#s quar#rel#ling all the while and fight#ing for the hedge#hog#s and in a ver#y short time the queen was in a fu#ri#ous pas#sion and went stamp#ing a#bout and shout#ing off with his head or off with her head a#bout once in a mi#nute alice be#gan to feel ver#y un#eas#y to be sure she had not as yet had an#y dis#pute with the queen but she knew that it might hap#pen an#y mi#nute and then thought she what would be#come of me they re dread#ful#ly fond of be#head#ing peo#ple he#re the great won#der i#s that there s an#y one left a#live she was look#ing a#bout for some way of es#cape and won#der#ing wheth#er she could get a#way with#out be#ing seen when she no#ticed a cu#ri#ous ap#pear#ance in the a#ir it puzzled her ver#y much at first but af#ter watch#ing it a mi#nute or two she made it out to be a grin and she sa#id to her#self it s the chesh#ire cat now i shall have some#bod#y to talk to how are you get#ting on sa#id the cat as soon as there was mouth e#nough for it to speak with alice wait#ed till the eyes ap#pear#ed and then nod#ded it s no use speak#ing to it she thought till its ear#s have come or at least one of them in an#oth#er mi#nute the whole head ap#pear#ed and then alice put down her fla#min#go and be#gan an ac#count of the game feel#ing ver#y glad she had some#one to lis#ten to her the cat seem#ed to think that there was e#nough of it now in sight and no more of it ap#pear#ed i don t think they play at all fair#ly alice be#gan in ra#ther a com#plain#ing tone and they all quar#rel so dread#ful#ly one can t hear one#self speak and they don t seem to have an#y rules in par#tic#u#lar at least if there are no#bod#y at#tend#s to them and you ve no i#de#a how con#fus#ing it i#s all the thing#s be#ing a#live for in#stance there s the arch i ve got to go through next walk#ing a#bout at the oth#er end of the ground and i should have cro#quet#ed the queen s hedge#hog just now on#ly it ran a#way when it saw mine com#ing how do you like the queen sa#id the cat in a low voice not at all sa#id alice she s so ex#treme#ly just then she no#ticed that the queen was close be#hind her list#ening so she went on like#ly to win that it s hard#ly worth while fin#ishing the game the queen smiled and passed on who are you talk#ing to sa#id the king go#ing up to alice and look#ing at the cat s head with great cu#ri#os#i#ty it s a friend of mine a chesh#ire cat sa#id alice al#low me to in#tro#duce it i don t like the look of it at all sa#id the king how#ev#er it may kiss my hand if it likes i d ra#ther not the cat re#mark#ed don t be im#per#ti#nent sa#id the king and don t look at me like that he got be#hind alice as he spoke a cat may look at a king sa#id alice i ve read that in some book but i don t re#mem#ber where well it must be re#moved sa#id the king ver#y de#cid#ed#ly and he called the queen who was pass#ing at the mo#ment my dear i wish you would have this cat re#moved the queen had on#ly one way of set#tling all difficulties great or small off with his head she sa#id with#out e#ven look#ing round i ll fetch the executioner my#self sa#id the king ea#ger#ly and he hur#ried off alice thought she might as well go back and see how the game was go#ing on as she heard the queen s voice in the dis#tance screaming with pas#sion she had al#read#y heard her sen#tence three of the play#ers to be ex#e#cut#ed for hav#ing miss#ed their turn#s and she did not like the look of thing#s at all as the game was in such con#fu#sion that she nev#er knew wheth#er it was her turn or not so she went in search of her hedge#hog the hedge#hog was en#gaged in a fight with an#oth#er hedge#hog which seem#ed to alice an ex#cel#lent opportunity for cro#quet#ing one of them with the oth#er the on#ly dif#fi#cul#ty was that her fla#min#go was gone a#cross to the oth#er side of the gar#den where alice could see it try#ing in a help#less sort of way to fly up in#to a tree by the time she had caught the fla#min#go and brought it back the fight was o#ver and both the hedge#hog#s were out of sight but it doesn t mat#ter much thought alice as all the arch#es are gone from this side of the ground so she tuck#ed it a#way un#der her arm that it might not es#cape a#gain and went back for a lit#tle more con#ver#sa#tion with her friend when she got back to the chesh#ire cat she was sur#prised to find quite a large crowd col#lect#ed round it there was a dis#pute go#ing on be#tween the executioner the king and the queen who were all talk#ing at once while all the rest were quite si#lent and look#ed ver#y uncomfortable the mo#ment alice ap#pear#ed she was appealed to by all three to set#tle the ques#tion and they re#peat#ed their arguments to her though as they all spoke at once she found it ver#y hard in#deed to make out ex#act#ly what they sa#id the executioner s ar#gu#ment was that you couldn t cut off a head un#less there was a bod#y to cut it off from that he had nev#er had to do such a thing be#fore and he wasn t go#ing to be#gin at his time of life the king s ar#gu#ment was that an#y#thing that had a head could be be#head#ed and that you weren t to talk non#sense the queen s ar#gu#ment was that if some#thing wasn t done a#bout it in less than no time she d have eve#ry#bod#y ex#e#cut#ed all round it was this last re#mark that had made the whole par#ty look so gra#ve and anx#ious alice could think of noth#ing else to say but it be#long#s to the duch#ess you d bet#ter ask her a#bout it she s in pris#on the queen sa#id to the executioner fetch her he#re and the executioner went off like an ar#row the cat s head be#gan fad#ing a#way the mo#ment he was gone and by the time he had come back with the duch#ess it had en#tire#ly dis#ap#pear#ed so the king and the executioner ran wild#ly up and down look#ing for it while the rest of the par#ty went back to the game chap#ter ix the mock tur#tle s sto#ry you can t think how glad i a#m to see you a#gain you dear old thing sa#id the duch#ess as she tuck#ed her arm af#fect#ionately in#to alice s and they walk#ed off to#geth#er alice was ver#y glad to find her in such a pleas#ant tem#per and thought to her#self that per#haps it was on#ly the pep#per that had made her so sav#age when they met in the kitch#en when i m a duch#ess she sa#id to her#self not in a ver#y hope#ful tone though i won t have an#y pep#per in my kitch#en at all soup does ver#y well with#out may#be it s al#ways pep#per that makes peo#ple hot tem#pered she went on ver#y much pleas#ed at hav#ing found out a new kind of rule and vin#e#gar that makes them sour and cam#o#mile that makes them bit#ter and and bar#ley sug#ar and such thing#s that make chil#dren sweet tem#pered i on#ly wish peo#ple knew that then they wouldn t be so stin#gy a#bout it you know she had quite for#got#ten the duch#ess by this time and was a lit#tle startled when she heard her voice close to her ear you re think#ing a#bout some#thing my dear and that makes you for#get to talk i can t tell you just now what the mor#al of that i#s but i shall re#mem#ber it in a bit per#haps it hasn t one alice ven#tured to re#mark tut tut child sa#id the duch#ess eve#ry#thing s got a mor#al if on#ly you can find it and she squeezed her#self up clos#er to alice s side as she spoke alice did not much like keep#ing so close to her first be#cause the duch#ess was ver#y ug#ly and sec#ond#ly be#cause she was ex#act#ly the right height to rest her chin up#on alice s shoul#der and it was an uncomfortably sharp chin how#ev#er she did not like to be rude so she bore it as well as she could the game s go#ing on ra#ther bet#ter now she sa#id by way of keep#ing up the con#ver#sa#tion a lit#tle tis so sa#id the duch#ess and the mor#al of that i#s oh tis love tis love that makes the world go round some#bod#y sa#id alice whispered that it s done by eve#ry#bod#y mind#ing their own busi#ness ah well it means much the same thing sa#id the duch#ess dig#ging her sharp lit#tle chin in#to alice s shoul#der as she added and the mor#al of that i#s take care of the sense and the sound#s will take care of them#selves how fond she i#s of find#ing morals in thing#s alice thought to her#self i dare say you re won#der#ing why i don t put my arm round your waist the duch#ess sa#id af#ter a pause the rea#son i#s that i m doubt#ful a#bout the tem#per of your fla#min#go shall i try the ex#per#i#ment he might bite alice cau#tious#ly re#ply#ed not feel#ing at all anx#ious to have the ex#per#i#ment tried ver#y true sa#id the duch#ess fla#min#go#es and mus#tard both bite and the mor#al of that i#s bird#s of a feath#er flock to#geth#er on#ly mus#tard isn t a bird alice re#mark#ed right as u#su#al sa#id the duch#ess what a clear way you have of put#ting thing#s it s a min#er#al i think sa#id alice of course it i#s sa#id the duch#ess who seem#ed read#y to a#gree to eve#ry#thing that alice sa#id there s a large mus#tard mine near he#re and the mor#al of that i#s the more there i#s of mine the less there i#s of yours oh i know ex#claim#ed alice who had not at#tend#ed to this last re#mark it s a veg#e#ta#ble it doesn t look like one but it i#s i quite a#gree with you sa#id the duch#ess and the mor#al of that i#s be what you would seem to be or if you d like it put more sim#ply nev#er im#ag#ine your#self not to be oth#er#wise than what it might ap#pear to others that what you were or might have been was not oth#er#wise than what you had been would have ap#pear#ed to them to be oth#er#wise i think i should un#der#stand that bet#ter alice sa#id ver#y po#lite#ly if i had it writ#ten down but i can t quite fol#low it as you say it that s noth#ing to what i could say if i chose the duch#ess re#ply#ed in a pleas#ed tone pray don t trou#ble your#self to say it an#y long#er than that sa#id alice oh don t talk a#bout trou#ble sa#id the duch#ess i make you a pre#sent of eve#ry#thing i ve sa#id as yet a cheap sort of pre#sent thought alice i m glad they don t give birth#day pres#ents like that but she did not ven#ture to say it out loud think#ing a#gain the duch#ess ask#ed with an#oth#er dig of her sharp lit#tle chin i ve a right to think sa#id alice sharp#ly for she was be#gin#ning to feel a lit#tle wor#ried just a#bout as much right sa#id the duch#ess as pigs have to fly and the m but he#re to alice s great sur#prise the duch#ess s voice died a#way e#ven in the mid#dle of her favourite word mor#al and the arm that was linked in#to hers be#gan to trem#ble alice look#ed up and there stood the queen in front of them with her arms fold#ed frown#ing like a thun#der#storm a fi#ne day your maj#es#ty the duch#ess be#gan in a low weak voice now i give you fair warn#ing shout#ed the queen stamp#ing on the ground as she spoke ei#ther you or your head must be off and that in a#bout half no time take your choice the duch#ess took her choice and was gone in a mo#ment let s go on with the game the queen sa#id to alice and alice was too much fright#ened to say a word but slow#ly fol#low#ed her back to the cro#quet ground the oth#er guest#s had tak#en ad#van#tage of the queen s ab#sence and were re#sting in the shade how#ev#er the mo#ment they saw her they hur#ried back to the game the queen mere#ly re#mark#ing that a mo#ment s de#lay would cost them their lives all the time they were play#ing the queen nev#er left off quar#rel#ling with the oth#er play#ers and shout#ing off with his head or off with her head those whom she sen#tenced were tak#en in#to cus#to#dy by the soldiers who of course had to leave off be#ing arch#es to do this so that by the end of half an hour or so there were no arch#es left and all the play#ers ex#cept the king the queen and alice were in cus#to#dy and un#der sen#tence of ex#e#cu#tion then the queen left off quite out of breath and sa#id to alice have you seen the mock tur#tle yet no sa#id alice i don t e#ven know what a mock tur#tle i#s it s the thing mock tur#tle soup i#s made from sa#id the queen i nev#er saw one or heard of one sa#id alice come on then sa#id the queen and he shall tell you his his#to#ry as they walk#ed off to#geth#er alice heard the king say in a low voice to the com#pa#ny gen#er#al#ly you are all par#don#ed come that s a good thing she sa#id to her#self for she had felt quite un#hap#py at the num#ber of executions the queen had ordered they ver#y soon came up#on a gryph#on ly#ing fast a#sleep in the sun if you don t know what a gryph#on i#s look at the pic#ture up la#zy thing sa#id the queen and take this young la#dy to see the mock tur#tle and to hear his his#to#ry i must go back and see af#ter some executions i have ordered and she walk#ed off leav#ing alice a#lone with the gryph#on alice did not quite like the look of the crea#ture but on the whole she thought it would be quite as safe to stay with it as to go af#ter that sav#age queen so she wait#ed the gryph#on sat up and rub#bed its eyes then it watch#ed the queen till she was out of sight then it chuck#led what fun sa#id the gryph#on half to it#self half to alice what i#s the fun sa#id alice why she sa#id the gryph#on it s all her fan#cy that they nev#er executes no#bod#y you know come on eve#ry#bod#y say#s come on he#re thought alice as she went slow#ly af#ter it i nev#er was so ordered a#bout in all my life nev#er they had not gone far be#fore they saw the mock tur#tle in the dis#tance sit#ting sad and lone#ly on a lit#tle ledge of rock and as they came near#er alice could hear him sigh#ing as if his heart would break she pit#ied him deep#ly what i#s his sor#row she ask#ed the gryph#on and the gryph#on answered ver#y near#ly in the same words as be#fore it s all his fan#cy that he hasn t got no sor#row you know come on so they went up to the mock tur#tle who look#ed at them with large eyes full of tears but sa#id noth#ing this he#re young la#dy sa#id the gryph#on she want#s for to know your his#to#ry she do i ll tell it her sa#id the mock tur#tle in a deep hol#low tone sit down both of you and don t speak a word till i ve fin#ished so they sat down and no#bod#y spoke for some min#utes alice thought to her#self i don t see how he can e#ven fin#ish if he doesn t be#gin but she wait#ed pa#tient#ly once sa#id the mock tur#tle at last with a deep sigh i was a re#al tur#tle these words were fol#low#ed by a ver#y long si#lence bro#ken on#ly by an oc#ca#sion#al exclamation of hjckrrh from the gryph#on and the con#stant heav#y sob#bing of the mock tur#tle alice was ver#y near#ly get#ting up and say#ing thank you sir for your in#ter#est#ing sto#ry but she could not help think#ing there must be more to come so she sat still and sa#id noth#ing when we were lit#tle the mock tur#tle went on at last more calm#ly though still sob#bing a lit#tle now and then we went to school in the sea the mas#ter was an old tur#tle we used to call him tor#toise why did you call him tor#toise if he wasn t one alice ask#ed we called him tor#toise be#cause he taught us sa#id the mock tur#tle an#gri#ly re#al#ly you are ver#y dull you ought to be a#shamed of your#self for ask#ing such a sim#ple ques#tion added the gryph#on and then they both sat si#lent and look#ed at poor alice who felt read#y to sink in#to the earth at last the gryph#on sa#id to the mock tur#tle drive on old fel#low don t be all day a#bout it and he went on in these words yes we went to school in the sea though you mayn t be#lieve it i nev#er sa#id i didn t in#ter#rupt#ed alice you did sa#id the mock tur#tle hold your tongue added the gryph#on be#fore alice could speak a#gain the mock tur#tle went on we had the best of educations in fact we went to school eve#ry day i ve been to a day school too sa#id alice you needn t be so proud as all that with ex#tra#s ask#ed the mock tur#tle a lit#tle anx#ious#ly yes sa#id alice we lear#ned french and mu#sic and wash#ing sa#id the mock tur#tle cer#tain#ly not sa#id alice indignantly ah then yours wasn t a re#al#ly good school sa#id the mock tur#tle in a tone of great re#lief now at ours they had at the end of the bill french mu#sic and wash#ing ex#tra you couldn t have want#ed it much sa#id alice liv#ing at the bot#tom of the sea i couldn t af#ford to learn it sa#id the mock tur#tle with a sigh i on#ly took the reg#u#lar course what was that in#quired alice reel#ing and writh#ing of course to be#gin with the mock tur#tle re#ply#ed and then the dif#fer#ent branch#es of a#rith#me#tic am#bi#tion dis#tract#ion uglification and de#ri#sion i nev#er heard of uglification alice ven#tured to say what i#s it the gryph#on lift#ed up both its paw#s in sur#prise what nev#er heard of uglifying it ex#claim#ed you know what to beau#ti#fy i#s i sup#pose yes sa#id alice doubt#ful#ly it means to make an#y#thing pret#ti#er well then the gryph#on went on if you don t know what to uglify i#s you are a sim#ple#ton alice did not feel en#cour#aged to ask an#y more quest#ions a#bout it so she turn#ed to the mock tur#tle and sa#id what else had you to learn well there was mys#ter#y the mock tur#tle re#ply#ed count#ing off the sub#ject#s on his flap#pers mys#ter#y an#cient and mod#ern with seaography then drawl#ing the drawl#ing mas#ter was an old con#ger eel that used to come once a week he taught us drawl#ing stretching and faint#ing in coil#s what was that like sa#id alice well i can t show it you my#self the mock tur#tle sa#id i m too stiff and the gryph#on nev#er learnt it hadn t time sa#id the gryph#on i went to the clas#sics mas#ter though he was an old crab he was i nev#er went to him the mock tur#tle sa#id with a sigh he taught laugh#ing and grief they used to say so he did so he did sa#id the gryph#on sigh#ing in his turn and both creatures hid their faces in their paw#s and how man#y hours a day did you do les#son#s sa#id alice in a hur#ry to change the sub#ject ten hours the first day sa#id the mock tur#tle nine the next and so on what a cu#ri#ous plan ex#claim#ed alice that s the rea#son they re called les#son#s the gryph#on re#mark#ed be#cause they less#en from day to day this was quite a new i#de#a to alice and she thought it o#ver a lit#tle be#fore she made her next re#mark then the e#lev#enth day must have been a hol#i#day of course it was sa#id the mock tur#tle and how did you man#age on the twelfth alice went on ea#ger#ly that s e#nough a#bout les#son#s the gryph#on in#ter#rupt#ed in a ver#y de#cid#ed tone tell her some#thing a#bout the gam#es now chap#ter x the lob#ster qua#drille the mock tur#tle sigh#ed deep#ly and drew the back of one flap#per a#cross his eyes he look#ed at alice and tried to speak but for a mi#nute or two sob#s choked his voice same as if he had a bone in his throat sa#id the gryph#on and it set to work shak#ing him and punch#ing him in the back at last the mock tur#tle recovered his voice and with tears run#ning down his cheek#s he went on a#gain you may not have lived much un#der the sea i ha#ven t sa#id alice and per#haps you were nev#er e#ven in#tro#duced to a lob#ster alice be#gan to say i once tast#ed but checked her#self hast#i#ly and sa#id no nev#er so you can have no i#de#a what a de#light#ful thing a lob#ster qua#drille i#s no in#deed sa#id alice what sort of a dance i#s it why sa#id the gryph#on you first form in#to a line a#long the sea shore two lines cried the mock tur#tle seal#s turtles salm#on and so on then when you ve clear#ed all the jel#ly fish out of the way that gen#er#al#ly takes some time in#ter#rupt#ed the gryph#on you ad#vance twice each with a lob#ster as a part#ner cried the gryph#on of course the mock tur#tle sa#id ad#vance twice set to part#ners change lobsters and re#tire in same or#der con#tin#ued the gryph#on then you know the mock tur#tle went on you throw the the lobsters shout#ed the gryph#on with a bound in#to the a#ir as far out to sea as you can swim af#ter them screamed the gryph#on turn a som#er#sault in the sea cried the mock tur#tle cap#ering wild#ly a#bout change lobsters a#gain yelled the gryph#on at the top of its voice back to land a#gain and that s all the first fig#ure sa#id the mock tur#tle sud#den#ly drop#ping his voice and the two creatures who had been jump#ing a#bout like mad thing#s all this time sat down a#gain ver#y sad#ly and qui#et#ly and look#ed at alice it must be a ver#y pret#ty dance sa#id alice tim#id#ly would you like to see a lit#tle of it sa#id the mock tur#tle ver#y much in#deed sa#id alice come let s try the first fig#ure sa#id the mock tur#tle to the gryph#on we can do with#out lobsters you know which shall sing oh you sing sa#id the gryph#on i ve for#got#ten the words so they be#gan sol#emn#ly danc#ing round and round alice eve#ry now and then tread#ing on her toe#s when they passed too close and wav#ing their forepaws to mark the time while the mock tur#tle sang this ver#y slow#ly and sad#ly will you walk a lit#tle fast#er sa#id a whit#ing to a snail there s a por#poise close be#hind us and he s tread#ing on my tail see how ea#ger#ly the lobsters and the turtles all ad#vance they are wait#ing on the shin#gle will you come and join the dance will you won t you will you won t you will you join the dance will you won t you will you won t you won t you join the dance you can re#al#ly have no no#tion how de#light#ful it will be when they take us up and throw us with the lobsters out to sea but the snail re#ply#ed too far too far and gave a look a#skance sa#id he thank#ed the whit#ing kind#ly but he would not join the dance would not could not would not could not would not join the dance would not could not would not could not could not join the dance what mat#ters it how far we go his scal#y friend re#ply#ed there i#s an#oth#er shore you know up#on the oth#er side the fur#ther off from eng#land the near#er i#s to france then turn not pale be#lov#ed snail but come and join the dance will you won t you will you won t you will you join the dance will you won t you will you won t you won t you join the dance thank you it s a ver#y in#ter#est#ing dance to watch sa#id alice feel#ing ver#y glad that it was o#ver at last and i do so like that cu#ri#ous song a#bout the whit#ing oh as to the whit#ing sa#id the mock tur#tle they you ve seen them of course yes sa#id alice i ve of#ten seen them at din#n she checked her#self hast#i#ly i don t know where din#n may be sa#id the mock tur#tle but if you ve seen them so of#ten of course you know what they re like i be#lieve so alice re#ply#ed thought#fully they have their tails in their mouth#s and they re all o#ver crumbs you re wrong a#bout the crumbs sa#id the mock tur#tle crumbs would all wash off in the sea but they have their tails in their mouth#s and the rea#son i#s he#re the mock tur#tle yawn#ed and shut his eyes tell her a#bout the rea#son and all that he sa#id to the gryph#on the rea#son i#s sa#id the gryph#on that they would go with the lobsters to the dance so they got thrown out to sea so they had to fall a long way so they got their tails fast in their mouth#s so they couldn t get them out a#gain that s all thank you sa#id alice it s ver#y in#ter#est#ing i nev#er knew so much a#bout a whit#ing be#fore i can tell you more than that if you like sa#id the gryph#on do you know why it s called a whit#ing i nev#er thought a#bout it sa#id alice why it does the boots and shoes the gryph#on re#ply#ed ver#y sol#emn#ly alice was thor#ough#ly puzzled does the boots and shoes she re#peat#ed in a won#der#ing tone why what are your shoes done with sa#id the gryph#on i mean what makes them so shin#y alice look#ed down at them and con#sid#ered a lit#tle be#fore she gave her an#swer they re done with black#ing i be#lieve boots and shoes un#der the sea the gryph#on went on in a deep voice are done with a whit#ing now you know and what are they made of alice ask#ed in a tone of great cu#ri#os#i#ty sol#es and eel#s of course the gryph#on re#ply#ed ra#ther impatiently an#y shrimp could have told you that if i d been the whit#ing sa#id alice whose thought#s were still run#ning on the song i d have sa#id to the por#poise keep back please we don t want you with us they were o#bliged to have him with them the mock tur#tle sa#id no wise fish would go an#y#where with#out a por#poise wouldn t it re#al#ly sa#id alice in a tone of great sur#prise of course not sa#id the mock tur#tle why if a fish came to me and told me he was go#ing a jour#ney i should say with what por#poise don t you mean pur#pose sa#id alice i mean what i say the mock tur#tle re#ply#ed in an of#fend#ed tone and the gryph#on added come let s hear some of your adventures i could tell you my adventures be#gin#ning from this morn#ing sa#id alice a lit#tle tim#id#ly but it s no use go#ing back to yes#ter#day be#cause i was a dif#fer#ent per#son then ex#plain all that sa#id the mock tur#tle no no the adventures first sa#id the gryph#on in an im#pa#tient tone explanations take such a dread#ful time so alice be#gan tell#ing them her adventures from the time when she first saw the white rab#bit she was a lit#tle nerv#ous a#bout it just at first the two creatures got so close to her one on each side and opened their eyes and mouth#s so ver#y wide but she gain#ed cour#age as she went on her list#eners were per#fect#ly qui#et till she got to the part a#bout her rep#eating you are old fa#ther wil#liam to the cat#er#pil#lar and the words all com#ing dif#fer#ent and then the mock tur#tle drew a long breath and sa#id that s ver#y cu#ri#ous it s all a#bout as cu#ri#ous as it can be sa#id the gryph#on it all came dif#fer#ent the mock tur#tle re#peat#ed thought#fully i should like to hear her try and re#peat some#thing now tell her to be#gin he look#ed at the gryph#on as if he thought it had some kind of au#thor#i#ty o#ver alice stand up and re#peat tis the voice of the slug#gard sa#id the gryph#on how the creatures or#der one a#bout and make one re#peat les#son#s thought alice i might as well be at school at once how#ev#er she got up and be#gan to re#peat it but her head was so full of the lob#ster qua#drille that she hard#ly knew what she was say#ing and the words came ver#y queer in#deed tis the voice of the lob#ster i heard him de#clare you have baked me too brown i must sug#ar my hair as a duck with its eye#lid#s so he with his nose trim#s his belt and his but#tons and turn#s out his toe#s lat#er ed#it#ions con#tin#ued as fol#low#s when the sand#s are all dry he i#s gay as a lark and will talk in con#temp#tu#ous ton#es of the shark but when the tide rises and shark#s are a#round his voice has a tim#id and trem#u#lous sound that s dif#fer#ent from what i used to say when i was a child sa#id the gryph#on well i nev#er heard it be#fore sa#id the mock tur#tle but it sound#s un#com#mon non#sense alice sa#id noth#ing she had sat down with her face in her hands won#der#ing if an#y#thing would ev#er hap#pen in a nat#u#ral way a#gain i should like to have it ex#plain#ed sa#id the mock tur#tle she can t ex#plain it sa#id the gryph#on hast#i#ly go on with the next verse but a#bout his toe#s the mock tur#tle per#sist#ed how could he turn them out with his nose you know it s the first po#si#tion in danc#ing alice sa#id but was dread#ful#ly puzzled by the whole thing and long#ed to change the sub#ject go on with the next verse the gryph#on re#peat#ed impatiently it be#gin#s i passed by his gar#den alice did not dare to dis#o#bey though she felt sure it would all come wrong and she went on in a trembling voice i passed by his gar#den and marked with one eye how the owl and the pan#ther were sharing a pie lat#er ed#it#ions con#tin#ued as fol#low#s the pan#ther took pie crust and gra#vy and meat while the owl had the dish as its share of the treat when the pie was all fin#ished the owl as a boon was kind#ly per#mit#ted to pock#et the spoon while the pan#ther re#ceived knife and fork with a growl and con#clud#ed the ban#quet what i#s the use of rep#eating all that stuff the mock tur#tle in#ter#rupt#ed if you don t ex#plain it as you go on it s by far the most con#fus#ing thing i ev#er heard yes i think you d bet#ter leave off sa#id the gryph#on and alice was on#ly too glad to do so shall we try an#oth#er fig#ure of the lob#ster qua#drille the gryph#on went on or would you like the mock tur#tle to sing you a song oh a song please if the mock tur#tle would be so kind alice re#ply#ed so ea#ger#ly that the gryph#on sa#id in a ra#ther of#fend#ed tone hm no ac#count#ing for tastes sing her tur#tle soup will you old fel#low the mock tur#tle sigh#ed deep#ly and be#gan in a voice some#times choked with sob#s to sing this beau#ti#ful soup so rich and green wait#ing in a hot tu#reen who for such dain#ty#es would not stoop soup of the eve#ning beau#ti#ful soup soup of the eve#ning beau#ti#ful soup beau ootiful soo oop beau ootiful soo oop soo oop of the e e eve#ning beau#ti#ful beau#ti#ful soup beau#ti#ful soup who car#es for fish game or an#y oth#er dish who would not give all else for two pennyworth on#ly of beau#ti#ful soup pennyworth on#ly of beau#ti#ful soup beau ootiful soo oop beau ootiful soo oop soo oop of the e e eve#ning beau#ti#ful beaut#i ful soup cho#rus a#gain cried the gryph#on and the mock tur#tle had just be#gun to re#peat it when a cry of the tri#al s be#gin#ning was heard in the dis#tance come on cried the gryph#on and tak#ing alice by the hand it hur#ried off with#out wait#ing for the end of the song what tri#al i#s it alice pant#ed as she ran but the gryph#on on#ly answered come on and ran the fast#er while more and more faint#ly came car#ried on the breeze that fol#low#ed them the mel#an#chol#y words soo oop of the e e eve#ning beau#ti#ful beau#ti#ful soup chap#ter xi who stole the tart#s the king and queen of hearts were seat#ed on their throne when they ar#rived with a great crowd as#sem#bled a#bout them all sort#s of lit#tle bird#s and beast#s as well as the whole pack of cards the knave was stand#ing be#fore them in chain#s with a sol#dier on each side to guard him and near the king was the white rab#bit with a trum#pet in one hand and a scroll of parch#ment in the oth#er in the ver#y mid#dle of the court was a ta#ble with a large dish of tart#s up#on it they look#ed so good that it made alice quite hun#gry to look at them i wish they d get the tri#al done she thought and hand round the re#fresh#ments but there seem#ed to be no chance of this so she be#gan look#ing at eve#ry#thing a#bout her to pas#s a#way the time alice had nev#er been in a court of jus#tice be#fore but she had read a#bout them in book#s and she was quite pleas#ed to find that she knew the name of near#ly eve#ry#thing there that s the judge she sa#id to her#self be#cause of his great wig the judge by the way was the king and as he wore his crown o#ver the wig look at the frontispiece if you want to see how he did it he did not look at all com#fort#a#ble and it was cer#tain#ly not be#com#ing and that s the ju#ry box thought alice and those twelve creatures she was o#bliged to say creatures you see be#cause some of them were animals and some were bird#s i sup#pose they are the jurors she sa#id this last word two or three times o#ver to her#self be#ing ra#ther proud of it for she thought and right#ly too that ver#y few lit#tle girl#s of her age knew the mean#ing of it at all how#ev#er ju#ry men would have done just as well the twelve jurors were all writ#ing ver#y bus#i#ly on slat#es what are they do#ing alice whispered to the gryph#on they can t have an#y#thing to put down yet be#fore the tri#al s be#gun they re put#ting down their names the gryph#on whispered in re#ply for fear they should for#get them be#fore the end of the tri#al stu#pid thing#s alice be#gan in a loud in#dig#nant voice but she stopped hast#i#ly for the white rab#bit cried out si#lence in the court and the king put on his spec#ta#cles and look#ed anx#ious#ly round to make out who was talk#ing alice could see as well as if she were look#ing o#ver their should#ers that all the jurors were writ#ing down stu#pid thing#s on their slat#es and she could e#ven make out that one of them didn t know how to spell stu#pid and that he had to ask his neighbour to tell him a nice mud#dle their slat#es ll be in be#fore the tri#al s o#ver thought alice one of the jurors had a pen#cil that squeak#ed this of course alice could not stand and she went round the court and got be#hind him and ver#y soon found an opportunity of tak#ing it a#way she did it so quick#ly that the poor lit#tle ju#ror it was bill the liz#ard could not make out at all what had be#come of it so af#ter hunt#ing all a#bout for it he was o#bliged to write with one fin#ger for the rest of the day and this was of ver#y lit#tle use as it left no mark on the slate her#ald read the ac#cu#sa#tion sa#id the king on this the white rab#bit blew three blast#s on the trum#pet and then unrolled the parch#ment scroll and read as fol#low#s the queen of hearts she made some tart#s all on a sum#mer day the knave of hearts he stole those tart#s and took them quite a#way con#sid#er your ver#dict the king sa#id to the ju#ry not yet not yet the rab#bit hast#i#ly in#ter#rupt#ed there s a great deal to come be#fore that call the first wit#ness sa#id the king and the white rab#bit blew three blast#s on the trum#pet and called out first wit#ness the first wit#ness was the hat#ter he came in with a tea#cup in one hand and a piece of bread and but#ter in the oth#er i beg par#don your maj#es#ty he be#gan for bring#ing these in but i hadn t quite fin#ished my tea when i was sent for you ought to have fin#ished sa#id the king when did you be#gin the hat#ter look#ed at the march hare who had fol#low#ed him in#to the court arm in arm with the dor#mouse four#teenth of march i think it was he sa#id fif#teenth sa#id the march hare six#teenth added the dor#mouse write that down the king sa#id to the ju#ry and the ju#ry ea#ger#ly wrote down all three dates on their slat#es and then added them up and re#duced the an#swer to shillings and pence take off your hat the king sa#id to the hat#ter it isn t mine sa#id the hat#ter sto#len the king ex#claim#ed turn#ing to the ju#ry who in#stant#ly made a mem#o#ran#dum of the fact i keep them to sell the hat#ter added as an ex#pla#na#tion i ve none of my own i m a hat#ter he#re the queen put on her spec#ta#cles and be#gan star#ing at the hat#ter who turn#ed pale and fidg#et#ed give your ev#i#dence sa#id the king and don t be nerv#ous or i ll have you ex#e#cut#ed on the spot this did not seem to en#cour#age the wit#ness at all he kept shift#ing from one foot to the oth#er look#ing un#eas#i#ly at the queen and in his con#fu#sion he bit a large piece out of his tea#cup in#stead of the bread and but#ter just at this mo#ment alice felt a ver#y cu#ri#ous sen#sa#tion which puzzled her a good deal un#til she made out what it was she was be#gin#ning to grow larg#er a#gain and she thought at first she would get up and leave the court but on se#cond thought#s she de#cid#ed to re#main where she was as long as there was room for her i wish you wouldn t squeeze so sa#id the dor#mouse who was sit#ting next to her i can hard#ly breathe i can t help it sa#id alice ver#y meek#ly i m grow#ing you ve no right to grow he#re sa#id the dor#mouse don t talk non#sense sa#id alice more bold#ly you know you re grow#ing too yes but i grow at a rea#son#a#ble pa#ce sa#id the dor#mouse not in that ri#dic#u#lous fash#ion and he got up ver#y sulk#y#ly and crossed o#ver to the oth#er side of the court all this time the queen had nev#er left off star#ing at the hat#ter and just as the dor#mouse crossed the court she sa#id to one of the off#icers of the court br#ing me the list of the sing#ers in the last con#cert on which the wretch#ed hat#ter trembled so that he shook both his shoes off give your ev#i#dence the king re#peat#ed an#gri#ly or i ll have you ex#e#cut#ed wheth#er you re nerv#ous or not i m a poor man your maj#es#ty the hat#ter be#gan in a trembling voice and i hadn t be#gun my tea not a#bove a week or so and what with the bread and but#ter get#ting so thin and the twin#kling of the tea the twin#kling of the what sa#id the king it be#gan with the tea the hat#ter re#ply#ed of course twin#kling be#gin#s with a t sa#id the king sharp#ly do you take me for a dunce go on i m a poor man the hat#ter went on and most thing#s twinkled af#ter that on#ly the march hare sa#id i didn t the march hare in#ter#rupt#ed in a great hur#ry you did sa#id the hat#ter i de#ny it sa#id the march hare he de#ny#es it sa#id the king leave out that part well at an#y rate the dor#mouse sa#id the hat#ter went on look#ing anx#ious#ly round to see if he would de#ny it too but the dor#mouse de#nied noth#ing be#ing fast a#sleep af#ter that con#tin#ued the hat#ter i cut some more bread and but#ter but what did the dor#mouse say one of the ju#ry ask#ed that i can t re#mem#ber sa#id the hat#ter you must re#mem#ber re#mark#ed the king or i ll have you ex#e#cut#ed the mis#er#a#ble hat#ter drop#ped his tea#cup and bread and but#ter and went down on one knee i m a poor man your maj#es#ty he be#gan you re a ver#y poor spea#ker sa#id the king he#re one of the guin#ea pigs cheered and was im#me#di#ate#ly sup#press#ed by the off#icers of the court as that i#s ra#ther a hard word i will just ex#plain to you how it was done they had a large can#vas bag which tied up at the mouth with strings in#to this they slip#ped the guin#ea pig head first and then sat up#on it i m glad i ve seen that done thought alice i ve so of#ten read in the newspapers at the end of trials there was some at#tempt#s at ap#plause which was im#me#di#ate#ly sup#press#ed by the off#icers of the court and i nev#er un#der#stood what it meant till now if that s all you know a#bout it you may stand down con#tin#ued the king i can t go no low#er sa#id the hat#ter i m on the floor as it i#s then you may sit down the king re#ply#ed he#re the oth#er guin#ea pig cheered and was sup#press#ed come that fin#ished the guin#ea pigs thought alice now we shall get on bet#ter i d ra#ther fin#ish my tea sa#id the hat#ter with an anx#ious look at the queen who was read#ing the list of sing#ers you may go sa#id the king and the hat#ter hur#ried#ly left the court with#out e#ven wait#ing to put his shoes on and just take his head off out#side the queen added to one of the off#icers but the hat#ter was out of sight be#fore the of#fic#er could get to the door call the next wit#ness sa#id the king the next wit#ness was the duch#ess s cook she car#ried the pep#per box in her hand and alice guess#ed who it was e#ven be#fore she got in#to the court by the way the peo#ple near the door be#gan sneez#ing all at once give your ev#i#dence sa#id the king shan t sa#id the cook the king look#ed anx#ious#ly at the white rab#bit who sa#id in a low voice your maj#es#ty must cross ex#am#ine this wit#ness well if i must i must the king sa#id with a mel#an#chol#y a#ir and af#ter fold#ing his arms and frown#ing at the cook till his eyes were near#ly out of sight he sa#id in a deep voice what are tart#s made of pep#per most#ly sa#id the cook treacle sa#id a sleep#y voice be#hind her col#lar that dor#mouse the queen shrieked out be#head that dor#mouse turn that dor#mouse out of court sup#press him pinch him off with his whisk#ers for some min#utes the whole court was in con#fu#sion get#ting the dor#mouse turn#ed out and by the time they had settled down a#gain the cook had dis#ap#pear#ed nev#er mind sa#id the king with an a#ir of great re#lief call the next wit#ness and he added in an un#der#tone to the queen re#al#ly my dear you must cross ex#am#ine the next wit#ness it quite makes my fore#head ache alice watch#ed the white rab#bit as he fumbled o#ver the list feel#ing ver#y cu#ri#ous to see what the next wit#ness would be like for they ha#ven t got much ev#i#dence yet she sa#id to her#self im#ag#ine her sur#prise when the white rab#bit read out at the top of his shrill lit#tle voice the name alice chap#ter xii alice s ev#i#dence he#re cried alice quite for#get#ting in the flur#ry of the mo#ment how large she had grown in the last few min#utes and she jump#ed up in such a hur#ry that she tip#ped o#ver the ju#ry box with the edge of her skirt up#set#ting all the jurymen on to the heads of the crowd be#low and there they lay sprawling a#bout re#mind#ing her ver#y much of a globe of gold#fish she had accidentally up#set the week be#fore oh i beg your par#don she ex#claim#ed in a tone of great dis#may and be#gan pick#ing them up a#gain as quick#ly as she could for the ac#ci#dent of the gold#fish kept run#ning in her head and she had a vague sort of i#de#a that they must be col#lect#ed at once and put back in#to the ju#ry box or they would die the tri#al can#not pro#ceed sa#id the king in a ver#y gra#ve voice un#til all the jurymen are back in their prop#er places all he re#peat#ed with great em#pha#sis look#ing hard at alice as he sa#id do alice look#ed at the ju#ry box and saw that in her haste she had put the liz#ard in head down#ward#s and the poor lit#tle thing was wav#ing its tail a#bout in a mel#an#chol#y way be#ing quite un#a#ble to move she soon got it out a#gain and put it right not that it sign#ifies much she sa#id to her#self i should think it would be quite as much use in the tri#al one way up as the oth#er as soon as the ju#ry had a lit#tle recovered from the shock of be#ing up#set and their slat#es and pen#cil#s had been found and hand#ed back to them they set to work ver#y dil#i#gent#ly to write out a his#to#ry of the ac#ci#dent all ex#cept the liz#ard who seem#ed too much o#ver#come to do an#y#thing but sit with its mouth o#pen gaz#ing up in#to the roof of the court what do you know a#bout this busi#ness the king sa#id to alice noth#ing sa#id alice noth#ing what#ev#er per#sist#ed the king noth#ing what#ev#er sa#id alice that s ver#y im#por#tant the king sa#id turn#ing to the ju#ry they were just be#gin#ning to write this down on their slat#es when the white rab#bit in#ter#rupt#ed unimportant your maj#es#ty means of course he sa#id in a ver#y re#spect#ful tone but frown#ing and mak#ing faces at him as he spoke unimportant of course i meant the king hast#i#ly sa#id and went on to him#self in an un#der#tone im#por#tant unimportant unimportant im#por#tant as if he were try#ing which word sound#ed best some of the ju#ry wrote it down im#por#tant and some unimportant alice could see this as she was near e#nough to look o#ver their slat#es but it doesn t mat#ter a bit she thought to her#self at this mo#ment the king who had been for some time bus#i#ly writ#ing in his note book cackled out si#lence and read out from his book rule for#ty two all per#son#s more than a mile high to leave the court eve#ry#bod#y look#ed at alice i m not a mile high sa#id alice you are sa#id the king near#ly two miles high added the queen well i shan t go at an#y rate sa#id alice be#sides that s not a reg#u#lar rule you invented it just now it s the old#est rule in the book sa#id the king then it ought to be num#ber one sa#id alice the king turn#ed pale and shut his note book hast#i#ly con#sid#er your ver#dict he sa#id to the ju#ry in a low trembling voice there s more ev#i#dence to come yet please your maj#es#ty sa#id the white rab#bit jump#ing up in a great hur#ry this pa#per has just been pick#ed up what s in it sa#id the queen i ha#ven t opened it yet sa#id the white rab#bit but it seem#s to be a let#ter writ#ten by the pris#on#er to to some#bod#y it must have been that sa#id the king un#less it was writ#ten to no#bod#y which isn t u#su#al you know who i#s it di#rect#ed to sa#id one of the jurymen it isn t di#rect#ed at all sa#id the white rab#bit in fact there s noth#ing writ#ten on the out#side he un#fold#ed the pa#per as he spoke and added it isn t a let#ter af#ter all it s a set of verses are they in the pris#on#er s handwriting ask#ed an#oth#er of the jurymen no they re not sa#id the white rab#bit and that s the queerest thing a#bout it the ju#ry all look#ed puzzled he must have im#i#tat#ed some#bod#y else s hand sa#id the king the ju#ry all bright#ened up a#gain please your maj#es#ty sa#id the knave i didn t write it and they can t prove i did there s no name sign#ed at the end if you didn t sign it sa#id the king that on#ly makes the mat#ter worse you must have meant some mis#chief or else you d have sign#ed your name like an hon#est man there was a gen#er#al clap#ping of hands at this it was the first re#al#ly clev#er thing the king had sa#id that day that proves his guilt sa#id the queen it proves noth#ing of the sort sa#id alice why you don t e#ven know what they re a#bout read them sa#id the king the white rab#bit put on his spec#ta#cles where shall i be#gin please your maj#es#ty he ask#ed be#gin at the be#gin#ning the king sa#id grave#ly and go on till you come to the end then stop these were the verses the white rab#bit read they told me you had been to her and mentioned me to him she gave me a good char#ac#ter but sa#id i could not swim he sent them word i had not gone we know it to be true if she should push the mat#ter on what would be#come of you i gave her one they gave him two you gave us three or more they all re#turn#ed from him to you though they were mine be#fore if i or she should chance to be in#volved in this af#fair he trust#s to you to set them free ex#act#ly as we were my no#tion was that you had been be#fore she had this fit an ob#sta#cle that came be#tween him and our#selves and it don t let him know she liked them best for this must ev#er be a se#cret kept from all the rest be#tween your#self and me that s the most im#por#tant piece of ev#i#dence we ve heard yet sa#id the king rub#bing his hands so now let the ju#ry if an#y one of them can ex#plain it sa#id alice she had grown so large in the last few min#utes that she wasn t a bit a#fraid of in#ter#rupt#ing him i ll give him six#pence i don t be#lieve there s an at#om of mean#ing in it the ju#ry all wrote down on their slat#es she doesn t be#lieve there s an at#om of mean#ing in it but none of them at#tempt#ed to ex#plain the pa#per if there s no mean#ing in it sa#id the king that saves a world of trou#ble you know as we needn t try to find an#y and yet i don t know he went on spreading out the verses on his knee and look#ing at them with one eye i seem to see some mean#ing in them af#ter all sa#id i could not swim you can t swim can you he added turn#ing to the knave the knave shook his head sad#ly do i look like it he sa#id which he cer#tain#ly did not be#ing made en#tire#ly of card#board all right so far sa#id the king and he went on muttering o#ver the verses to him#self we know it to be true that s the ju#ry of course i gave her one they gave him two why that must be what he did with the tart#s you know but it goes on they all re#turn#ed from him to you sa#id alice why there they are sa#id the king tri#umph#antly point#ing to the tart#s on the ta#ble noth#ing can be clear#er than that then a#gain be#fore she had this fit you nev#er had fit#s my dear i think he sa#id to the queen nev#er sa#id the queen fu#ri#ous#ly throwing an inkstand at the liz#ard as she spoke the un#for#tu#nate lit#tle bill had left off writ#ing on his slate with one fin#ger as he found it made no mark but he now hast#i#ly be#gan a#gain us#ing the ink that was trickling down his face as long as it last#ed then the words don t fit you sa#id the king look#ing round the court with a smile there was a dead si#lence it s a pun the king added in an of#fend#ed tone and eve#ry#bod#y laugh#ed let the ju#ry con#sid#er their ver#dict the king sa#id for a#bout the twen#ti#eth time that day no no sa#id the queen sen#tence first ver#dict af#ter#ward#s stuff and non#sense sa#id alice loud#ly the i#de#a of hav#ing the sen#tence first hold your tongue sa#id the queen turn#ing pur#ple i won t sa#id alice off with her head the queen shout#ed at the top of her voice no#bod#y moved who car#es for you sa#id alice she had grown to her full size by this time you re noth#ing but a pack of cards at this the whole pack rose up in#to the a#ir and came fly#ing down up#on her she gave a lit#tle scream half of fright and half of an#ger and tried to beat them off and found her#self ly#ing on the bank with her head in the lap of her sis#ter who was gen#tly brush#ing a#way some dead leaves that had fluttered down from the trees up#on her face wake up alice dear sa#id her sis#ter why what a long sleep you ve had oh i ve had such a cu#ri#ous dream sa#id alice and she told her sis#ter as well as she could re#mem#ber them all these strange adventures of hers that you have just been read#ing a#bout and when she had fin#ished her sis#ter kiss#ed her and sa#id it was a cu#ri#ous dream dear cer#tain#ly but now run in to your tea it s get#ting late so alice got up and ran off think#ing while she ran as well she might what a won#der#ful dream it had been but her sis#ter sat still just as she left her lean#ing her head on her hand watch#ing the set#ting sun and think#ing of lit#tle alice and all her won#der#ful adventures till she too be#gan dream#ing af#ter a fash#ion and this was her dream first she dream#ed of lit#tle alice her#self and once a#gain the ti#ny hands were clasp#ed up#on her knee and the bright ea#ger eyes were look#ing up in#to hers she could hear the ver#y ton#es of her voice and see that queer lit#tle toss of her head to keep back the wan#der#ing hair that would al#ways get in#to her eyes and still as she list#ened or seem#ed to lis#ten the whole place a#round her be#came a#live the strange creatures of her lit#tle sis#ter s dream the long grass rustled at her feet as the white rab#bit hur#ried by the fright#ened mouse splashed his way through the neighbouring pool she could hear the rat#tle of the tea#cup#s as the march hare and his friend#s shared their nev#er end#ing meal and the shrill voice of the queen ordering off her un#for#tu#nate guest#s to ex#e#cu#tion once more the pig ba#by was sneez#ing on the duch#ess s knee while plat#es and dish#es crash#ed a#round it once more the shriek of the gryph#on the squeak#ing of the liz#ard s slate pen#cil and the chok#ing of the sup#press#ed guin#ea pigs filled the a#ir mixed up with the dis#tant sob#s of the mis#er#a#ble mock tur#tle so she sat on with closed eyes and half be#lieved her#self in won#der#land though she knew she had but to o#pen them a#gain and all would change to dull re#al#i#ty the grass would be on#ly rustling in the wind and the pool rippling to the wav#ing of the reeds the rat#tling tea#cup#s would change to tin#kling sheep be#l#ls and the queen s shrill cries to the voice of the shep#herd boy and the sneeze of the ba#by the shriek of the gryph#on and all the oth#er queer noises would change she knew to the con#fused clamour of the bus#y farm yard while the low#ing of the cat#tle in the dis#tance would take the place of the mock tur#tle s heav#y sob#s last#ly she pic#tured to her#self how this same lit#tle sis#ter of hers would in the af#ter time be her#self a grown wom#an and how she would keep through all her rip#er year#s the sim#ple and lov#ing heart of her child#hood and how she would gath#er a#bout her oth#er lit#tle chil#dren and make their eyes bright and ea#ger with man#y a strange tale per#haps e#ven with the dream of won#der#land of long a#go and how she would feel with all their sim#ple sor#row#s and find a pleas#ure in all their sim#ple joy#s remembering her own child life and the hap#py sum#mer days