quotes.txt

Temper gets you into trouble. Pride keeps you there.
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We are drowning in information and starved for knowledge.
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You don't have to burn books to destroy a culture. Just get people to stop reading them.
    Ray Bradbury
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If you can't convince them, confuse them.
    Harry S Truman
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Trust in Allah, but tie your camel.
    Old Muslim Proverb
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In those days spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were real men, 
women were real women and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were real 
small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri.
    Douglas Adams
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Management by objectives works if you first think through your objectives. Ninety percent of the time you haven't.
    Peter F. Drucker
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it's easy to get lost in thought if it's not familiar territory to you.
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Within the problem lies the solution
    Milton Katselas
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If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich.
    John F. Kennedy ,  Inaugural Address (Jan. 20, 1961)
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In a time of drastic change it is the learners who inherit the future. 
The learned usually find themselves equipped to live in a world that no longer exists.
    Eric Hoffer
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When one door closes another door opens; 
but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, 
that we do not see the ones which open for us.
    Alexander Graham Bell
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I am for those means which will give the greatest good to the greatest number.
    Abraham Lincoln
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We are not human beings on a spiritual journey. We are spiritual beings on a human journey.
    Stephen R. Covey
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A wise man's question contains half the answer.
    Solomon Ibn Gabirol
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Immortality lies not in the things you leave behind, but in the people your life has touched.
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Data is not information, Information is not knowledge, 
Knowledge is not understanding, Understanding is not wisdom.
    Cliff Stoll & Gary Schubert
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The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
    Alan Kay
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Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes.
    Oscar Wilde
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Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced.
    Soren Kierkegaard
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Common sense is not so common.
    Voltaire
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The power of man has grown in every sphere, except over himself.
    Winston Churchill
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Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. 
You may have a heart of gold -- but so does a hard-boiled egg.
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In youth we learn; in age we understand.
    Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach
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The first mistake in public business is the going into it.
    Ben Franklin
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I can't complain, but sometimes I still do.
    Joe Walsh
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An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out.
    Will Rogers
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Victory belongs to the most persevering.
    Napoleon Bonaparte
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There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that's your own self.
    Aldous Huxley
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History does not record anywhere at any time a religion that has any rational basis. 
Religion is a crutch for people not strong enough to stand up to the unknown without help. 
But, like dandruff, most people do have a religion and spend time and money on it 
and seem to derive considerable pleasure from fiddling with it.
    Robert Heinlein ,  Time Enough for Love (1972)
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This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. 
Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness.
    Dalai Lama
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Justice cannot be for one side alone, but must be for both.
    Eleanor Roosevelt
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Age is only a number, a cipher for the records. A man can't retire his experience. 
He must use it. Experience achieves more with less energy and time.
    Bernard Baruch
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Tell me your friends, and I'll tell you who you are.
    Assyrian Proverb
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The problems that exist in the world today cannot be solved by the level of thinking that created them.
    Albert Einstein
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The louder he talked of his honor, the faster we counted our spoons.
    Ralph Waldo Emerson ,  Conduct of Life
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I don't like that man. I must get to know him better.
    Abraham Lincoln
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Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot
    Charlie Chaplin
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A professional is a person who can do his best at a time when he doesn't particularly feel like it.
    Alistair Cooke
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Be not afraid of going slowly; be only afraid of standing still.
    Chinese Proverb
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I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, 
and kindness from the unkind; yet strange, I am ungrateful to these teachers.
    Kahlil Gibran
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Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everybody agrees that it is old enough to know better.
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Men for the sake of getting a living forget to live.
    Margaret Fuller
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The whole world steps aside for the man who knows where he is going.
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Skill and confidence are an unconquered army.
    George Herbert
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Just because something is tradition doesn't make it right.
    Anthony J. D'Angelo ,  The College Blue Book
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Don't reinvent the wheel, just realign it.
    Anthony J. D'Angelo ,  The College Blue Book
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Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.
    Cicero
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It is hard enough to remember my opinions, without also remembering my reasons for them!
    Nietzsche
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Tradition is what you resort to when you don't have the time or the money to do it right.
    Kurt Herbert Alder
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He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.
    Chinese proverb
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By all means, let's not confuse ourselves with the facts!
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Change is good, but dollars are better.
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I start with the premise that the function of leadership is to produce more leaders, not more followers.
    Ralph Nader
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Silent gratitude isn't much use to anyone.
    G. B. Stern
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Don't listen to friends when the Friend inside you says 'Do this.'
    Mohandas Gandhi
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The thought manifests as the word; The word manifests as the deed; 
The deed develops into habit; And habit hardens into character. 
So watch the thought and its ways with care, And let it spring from love; 
Born out of concern for all beings.
    The Budha
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Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that 
nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.
    Oscar Wilde
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A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
    Herm Albright
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Nothing in life is static; it either gets better, or it gets worse.
    Lloyd Dobens and Clare CrawfordMason ,  Thinking About Quality
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Money and success don't change people; they merely amplify what is already there.
    Will Smith
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I find the great thing in this world is not so much where we stand, 
as in what direction we are moving -- we must sail sometimes with the wind and 
sometimes against it -- but we must sail, and not drift, nor lie at anchor.
    Oliver W. Holmes
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We can never tell what is in store for us.
    Harry S Truman
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One of the hardest things in this world is to admit you are wrong. 
And nothing is more helpful in resolving a situation than its frank admission.
    Benjamin Disreali
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If we fight a war and win it with H-bombs, 
what history will remember is not the ideals we were fighting for but 
the methods we used to accomplish them. 
These methods will be compared to the warfare of Genghis Khan who ruthlessly 
killed every last inhabitant of Persia.
    Hans A. Bethe
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Ability is of little account without opportunity.
    Napoleon Bonaparte
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I hate mankind, for I consider myself one of the best of them, and I know how bad I am.
    Samuel Johnson
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The moment we want to believe something, we suddenly see all the arguments for it, 
and become blind to the arguments against it.
    George Bernard Shaw
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The difficulty is not so great to die for a friend, 
as to find a friend worth dying for.
    Homer
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You can delegate authority, but not responsibility.
    Stephen W. Comiskey
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Vacation is what you take when you can't take what you've been taking any longer.
    The Lion
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These days, the wages of sin depend on what kind of deal you make with the devil.
    Kara Vichko
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For it is mutual trust, even more than mutual interest that holds human associations together. 
Our friends seldom profit us but they make us feel safe... 
Marriage is a scheme to accomplish exactly that same end.
    H. L. Mencken ,  (1928)
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Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.
    Theodore Roosevelt
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Weather is a great bluffer. I guess the same is true of our human society -- 
things can look dark, then a break shows in the clouds, and all is changed.
    E. B. White
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People are more easily led than driven.
    David Harold Fink
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An artist never really finishes his work; he merely abandons it.
    Paul Valry
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Outside show is a poor substitute for inner worth.
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Genius is only a greater aptitude for patience.
    GeorgeLouis Leclerc de Buffon
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While one should always study the method of a great artist, 
one should never imitate his manner. 
The manner of an artist is essentially individual, 
the method of an artist is absolutely universal. 
The first is personality, which no one should copy; 
the second is perfection, which all should aim at.
    Oscar Wilde
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Make no little plans; they have no magic to stir men's blood.... Make big plans... aim high in hope and work.
    Daniel H. Burnham
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Whatever you are, be a good one.
    Abraham Lincoln
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Few people think more than two or three times a year. 
I have made an international reputation for myself by thinking once or twice a week.
    George Bernard Shaw
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It is the quality of our work which will please God and not the quantity.
    Mahatma Gandhi
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We are rich only through what we give, and poor only through what we refuse.
    Anne Swetchine
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The greatest way to live with honor in this world is to be what we pretend to be.
    Socrates
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Man is a gregarious creature, more so in mind than in body. 
He may like to go alone for a walk but he hates to stand alone in his opinion.
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The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits
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Do not hover always on the surface of things, nor take up suddenly, 
with mere appearances; but penetrate into the depth of matters, 
as far as your time and circumstances allow, 
especially in those things which relate to your profession.
    Isaac Watts
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There is a time for departure even when there's no certain place to go.
    Tennessee Williams
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Leadership is practiced not so much in words as in attitude and in actions.
    Harold Geneen
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Understanding human needs is half the job of meeting them.
    Adlai Stevenson ,  (October 3, 1952)
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It's easy to sit there and say you'd like to have more money. 
And I guess that's what I like about it. It's easy. 
Just sitting there, rocking back and forth, wanting that money.
    Jack Handy
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Not only are you what you think you are, more so; what you think, you are.
    Anthony J. D'Angelo ,  The College Blue Book
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Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.
    Abba Eban
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His ignorance is encyclopedic
    Abba Eban
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Israel is not an aviary.
    Abba Eban 
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When I was first here, we had the advantages of the underdog. Now we have the disadvantages of the overdog.
    Abba Eban
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Time and again these governments have rejected proposals today-and longed for them tomorrow.
    Abba Eban
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I think that this is the first war in history that on the morrow the victors sued 
for peace and the vanquished called for unconditional surrender.
    Abba Eban
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Lest Arab governments be tempted out of sheer routine to rush into impulsive rejection, 
let me suggest that tragedy is not what men suffer but what they miss.
    Abba Eban
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The Jews are the living embodiment of the minority, the constant 
reminder of what duties societies owe their minorities, whoever they might be.
    Abba Eban
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A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually.
    Abba Eban
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He who lives with his memories becomes old. He who lives with plans for the future remains young.
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Be everywhere, do everything, and never fail to astonish the customer.
    Macy's Motto
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Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
    Will Durant
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To be upset over what you don't have is to waste what you do have.
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If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
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Recompense injury with justice, and recompense kindness with kindness.
    Confucius ,  The Confucian Analects
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Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
    F. P. Jones
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A man will fight harder for his interests than for his rights.
    Napoleon
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It is impossible to design a system so perfect that no one needs to be good.
    T. S. Eliot
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He who has never failed somewhere... that man can not be great.
    Herman Melville
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No matter how much the cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
    Abraham Lincoln
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I like to see a man proud of the place in which he lives. 
I like to see a man live so that his place will be proud of him.
    Abraham Lincoln
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If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him 
is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing 
to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."
    Jack Handy
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You do not destroy an idea by killing people; you replace it with a better one.
    Edward Keating
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I am always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught.
    Winston Churchill
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Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.
    Will Rogers
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Ever notice that what the hell is always the right decision?
    Marilyn Monroe
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Laws do not persuade just because they threaten.
    Seneca
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If there is no struggle, there is no progress.
    Frederick Douglass
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To solve the problems of today, we must focus on tomorrow.
    Erik Nupponen
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A leader is someone who steps back from the entire system and tries 
to build a more collaborative, more innovative system that will work over the long term.
    Robert Reich
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I am only one; but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something.
    Helen Keller
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In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in an clearer light, 
and what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself into crystal clearness. 
Our life is a long and arduous quest after Truth.
    Mahatma Gandhi
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The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.
    Thomas Jefferson
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The greater the difficulty, the more the glory in surmounting it.
    Epicurus
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The legacy of Democrats and Republicans approaches: Libertarianism by bankruptcy.
    Nick Nuessle (1992)
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Victory is a political fiction.
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Delay is preferable to error.
    Thomas Jefferson
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Home is an invention on which no one has yet improved.
    Ann Douglas
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The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed 
ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function.
    F. Scott Fitzgerald
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Journalists cover words and delude themselves into thinking they have committed journalism.
    Hedrick Smith
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Upper classes are a nation's past; the middle class is its future.
    Ayn Rand
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Some see things as they are and ask 'Why?'. I dream things that never were and ask, 'Why not?'
    George Bernard Shaw
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The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, 
is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. 
We cause accidents.
    Nathaniel Borenstein
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It is the person who is blind to what goes on around him that is most surprised when the same things happen to him.
    M. Thompson
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Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. 
It takes a touch of genius--and a lot of courage--to move in the opposite direction.
    Ernst F. Schumacher
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The absence of alternatives clears the mind marvelously.
    Henry Kissinger
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Freedom is just Chaos, with better lighting.
    Alan Dean Foster ,  To the Vanishing Point
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True Love is only for those strong enough to endure it.
    Jim Roberts ,  Journals of Time
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Without trust, words become the hollow sound of a wooden gong. With trust, words become life itself.
    John Harold
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That's the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria!
    Calvin
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Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving us worthy evidence of the fact.
    George Eliot
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You know you're getting old when it takes to much effort to procrastinate.
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Crude classifications and false generalizations are the curse of organized life.
    George Bernard Shaw
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Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.
    Muhammad Ali
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Do what's right. Do it right. Do it right now.
    Barry Forbes
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If you cannot find peace within yourself, you will never find it anywhere else.
    Marvin Gaye
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The will to do, the soul to dare.
    Sir Walter Scott
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One of the most basic principles for making and keeping peace within and between nations... 
is that in political, military, moral, and spiritual confrontations, 
there should be an honest attempt at the reconciliation of differences before resorting to combat.
    Jimmy Carter
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Reality doesn't bite, rather our perception of reality bites.
    Anthony J. D'Angelo ,  The College Blue Book
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My grandfather once told me that there are two kinds of people: 
those who work and those who take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; 
there was less competition there.
    Indira Gandhi
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How can you govern a country which has 246 varieties of cheese?
    Charles De Gaulle
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We feel free when we escape -- even if it be but from the frying pan to the fire.
    Eric Hoffer
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Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
    George Santayana
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What does not destroy me, makes me strong.
    Friedrich Nietzsche
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Before you put on a frown, make absolutely sure there are no smiles available.
    Jim Beggs
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"Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time"
    Bursar 1 - Hex 0 - Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
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Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a rigged demo.
    James Klass
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I never think of the future. It comes soon enough.
    Albert Einstein
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It's better to be quotable than to be honest.
    Tom Stoppard
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Women prefer men who have something tender about them -- especially the legal kind.
    Kay Ingram
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Try not. Do or do not.
    YODA
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Live to learn... forget... and learn again.
    Brian
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Security is an illusion. Life is either a daring adventure or it is nothing at all.
    Keller
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The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. 
When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. 
When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. 
Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.
    Confucius
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Kiss the girl, get the key... they never taught us *that* in the Obsidian Order
    Elim Garak - Star-Trek Deep space Nine
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Lying is a skill like any other and if you want to maintain a level of excellence you have to practice constantly.
    Elim Garak - Star-Trek Deep space Nine
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The essence of knowledge is, having it, to apply it; not having it, to confess your ignorance.
    Confucius
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Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried.
    Mae West
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Always watch where you are going. Otherwise, you may step on a piece of the Forest that was left out by mistake.
    A. A. Milne ,  Pooh's Little Instruction Book
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As we know, There are known knowns. There are things we know we know. 
We also know there are known unknowns. That is to say we know there are 
some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns, 
the ones we don't know we don't know.
    Donald Rumsfeld
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Since pacifists have more freedom of action in countries where traces of democracy remain, 
pacifism can act more effectively against democracy than for it. 
Objectively, the pacifist is pro-Nazi.
    George Orwell
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"you can fool all the people some of the time and some of the people all the time, 
but you cannot fool all the people all the time."
    Abraham Lincoln
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if i were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?"
    Abraham Lincoln
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Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.
    Abraham Lincoln
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Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left behind by those who hustle.
    Abraham Lincoln
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Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, 
that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, 
support any friend, oppose any foe to assure the survival and the success of liberty.
    Inaugural Address (January 20, 1961) - John F. Kennedy
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Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
    John F. Kennedy
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The best way to have a good idea is to have a lot of ideas.
    Dr. Linus Pauling
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All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence -- and then success is sure.
    Mark Twain
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The first casualty when war comes is truth.
    Hiram Johnson
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A lie would have no sense unless the truth were felt as dangerous.
    Alfred Alder
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Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. 
If I'm not there, I go to work.
    Robert Orben
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To be ignorant of what happened before you were born is to be ever a child. 
For what is man's lifetime unless the memory of past events is woven with those of earlier times?
    Marcus Tullius Cicero, Orator
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Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can.
    Danny Kaye
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Never part without loving words to think of during your absence. It may be that you will not meet again in life.
    John Paul Richter
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Nothing is particularly hard if you divide it into small jobs.
    Henry Ford
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It is unwise to be too sure of one's own wisdom. 
It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might 
weaken and the wisest might err.
    Mahatma Gandhi
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Not life, but good life, is to be chiefly valued.
    Socrates
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To obtain a man's opinion of you, make him mad.
    Oliver Wendell Holmes
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If one does not understand a person, one tends to regard him as a fool.
    Carl Jung
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A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his client to plant vines.
    Frank Lloyd Wright
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Isn't it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction listen to weather forecasts and economists?
    Kelvin Throop, III
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There is hardly anyone whose sexual life, if it were broadcast, would not fill the world at large with surprise and horror.
    W. Somerset Maugham
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The key to being a good manager is keeping the people who hate me away from those who are still undecided.
    Casey Stengal
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Life is a tale told by an idiot -- full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.
    William Shakespeare
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If you have a vision, do something with it.
    Anthony J. D'Angelo ,  The College Blue Book
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Know ye not why We created you all from the same dust? That no one should exalt himself over the other.
    Baha'u'llah
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If you want to succeed, you'd better look as if you mean business.
    Jeanne Holm
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A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.
    Robert Frost
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Fortune favors the bold.
    Virgil
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We shall show mercy, but we shall not ask for it.
    Sir Winston Churchill ,  speech in the House of Commons, July 14, 1940
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You can learn a lot from people who view the world differently than you do.
    Anthony J. D'Angelo ,  The College Blue Book
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When late morning rolls around and you're feeling a bit out of sorts, 
don't worry; you're probably just a little eleven o'clockish.
    A. A. Milne ,  Pooh's Little Instruction Book
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Mankind is the animal that makes tools. In each generation, only a few people 
get a chance to create new tools. Very, very few get to contribute to making 
a tool that changes the lives of first hundreds, then thousands, then tens of thousands, 
and someday millions of people.
    John Walker, Autodesk
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Every program in development at MIT expands until it can read mail.
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A lot of people I know believe in positive thinking, and so do I. I believe everything positively stinks.
    Lew Col
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A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.
    Oscar Wilde, "The Portrait of Mr. W.H."
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An idea is not responsible for the people who believe in it.
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Arrakis teaches the attitude of the knife - chopping off what's incomplete and saying: "Now it's complete because it's ended here."
    Muad'dib, "Dune"
----
At the end of your life there'll be a good rest, and no further activities are scheduled.
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Before you ask more questions, think about whether you really want to know the answers.
    Gene Wolfe, "The Claw of the Conciliator"
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Brahma said: Well, after hearing ten thousand explanations, a fool is no wiser.  
But an intelligent man needs only two thousand five hundred.
    The Mahabharata
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Catharsis is something I associate with pornography and crossword puzzles.
    Howard Chaykin
----
Circumstances rule men; men do not rule circumstances.
    Herodotus
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Coincidences are spiritual puns.
    G.K. Chesterton
----
Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.
    R. Geis
----
Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't,
don't call it destiny; call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.
    Joseph Heller, "God Knows"
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Disease can be cured; fate is incurable.
    Chinese proverb
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Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive.
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Great acts are made up of small deeds.
    Lao Tsu
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He that composes himself is wiser than he that composes a book.
    B. Franklin
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He who knows others is wise.
He who knows himself is enlightened.
    Lao Tsu
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He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.
    Lao Tsu
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He who knows, does not speak.  He who speaks, does not know.
    Lao Tsu
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Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished:
if you're alive, it isn't.
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I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today.
    William Allen White
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I do not seek the ignorant; the ignorant seek me -- I will instruct them.
I ask nothing but sincerity.  If they come out of habit, they become tiresome.
    I Ching
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I gained nothing at all from Supreme Enlightenment, and for that very
reason it is called Supreme Enlightenment.
    Gotama Buddha
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In order to discover who you are, first learn who everybody else is;
you're what's left.
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In the next world, you're on your own.
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Kindness is the beginning of cruelty.
    Muad'dib [Frank Herbert, "Dune"]
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Murphy was an optimist.
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Murphy's Law is recursive.  Washing your car to make it rain doesn't work.
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Music in the soul can be heard by the universe.
    Lao Tsu
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Ninety percent of everything is crap.
    Theodore Sturgeon
----
No matter where I go, the place is always called "here".
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Remember, Grasshopper, falling down 1000 stairs begins by tripping over the first one.
    Confusion
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Rule of Life #1 -- Never get separated from your luggage.
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To lead people, you must follow behind.
    Lao Tsu
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Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it.
    Gandhi
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Wisdom is knowing what to do with what you know.
    J. Winter Smith
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With listening comes wisdom, with speaking repentance.
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You can get *anywhere* in ten minutes if you drive fast enough.
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You must be the change you wish to see in the world.
    Mahatma Gandhi
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A log may float in a river, but that does not make it a crocodile.
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It isn't the mountains ahead that wear you out, it's the grain of sand in your shoe
----
Moderation is a virtue only in those who are thought to have an alternative.
    Henry Kissinger
----
Many forms of Government have been tried, and will be tried in this world of sin and woe. 
No one pretends that democracy is perfect or all-wise. Indeed, it has been said that 
democracy is the worst form of government except all those other forms that have been tried from time to time.
    Sir Winston Churchill ,  Hansard, November 11, 1947
----
If money is your hope for independence you will never have it. 
----
The only real security that a man will have in this world is a reserve of knowledge, experience, and ability.
    Henry Ford
----
You can't build a reputation on what you are going to do.
    Henry Ford
----
A wise man can see more from the bottom of a well than a fool can from a mountain top.
----
It is only the wisest and the stupidest that cannot change.
    Confucius ,  Analects
----
To save your world you asked this man to die; Would this man, could he see you now, ask why?
    W. H. Auden ,  Epitaph for an Unknown Soldier
----
Have no friends not equal to yourself.
    Confucius ,  The Confucian Analects
----
There are three things which the superior man guards against. 
In youth...lust. When he is strong...quarrelsomeness. 
When he is old...covetousness.
    Confucius ,  The Confucian Analects
----
I disapprove of what you say, but will defend to the death your right to say it.
    Voltaire
----
Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities.
    Voltaire
----
If I have been able to see further, it was only because I stood on the shoulders of giants.
    Sir Isaac Newton
----
I do not feel obliged to believe that the same god who has endowed us with sense, 
reason and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.
    Galileo
----
Choose your friends carefully. Your enemies will choose you.
    Yassir Arafat
----
A friend you have to buy; enemies you get for nothing.
----
A good friend is often better than a brother.
----
A little fire burns up a great deal of corn.
----
A man dies when he stops working.
----
A man too good for the world is no good for his wife.
----
A penny is a lot of money, if you have not got a penny.
----
Against stupidity; God Himself is helpless
----
Do not judge your fellow man until you have stood in his place.
----
Don't approach a goat from the front, a horse from the back, or a fool from any side.
----
Don't ask questions of fairy tales.
----
He that eats till he is sick must fast till he is well.
----
If your friend becomes your enemy, he will be your enemy for life.
----
One God and so many enemies.
----
One has fear in front of a goat, in back of a mule, and on every side of a fool.
----
Programmers don't sleep - they just park their heads
----
Some people believe in windows They also believe that the earth is flat.
----
Stupid people always think they are right. Wise people listen to advice.
----
You can lead a man to politics, but you can't make him think
----
Hidden talent counts for nothing
    Nero
----
Don't hate; it is too big a burden to bear.
    Martin Luther King, Jr.
----
I have a dream, that my four little children will one day live in a nation 
where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.
I have a dream today!
    Martin Luther King, Jr.
----
In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends
    Martin Luther King, Jr.
----
And when a man injures and oppresses you and deals unjustly with you, 
you should deal kindly with him and forgive him. This you will strike at the root 
of hatred and enmity and he who is your enemy will become your friend.
    Koran
----
He deserves Paradise who makes his companions laugh.
    Koran
----
If you don't know where you are going, any road will take you there.
    Koran
----
Prayer carries us half way to God, fasting brings us to the door of His palace, 
and alms-giving procures us admission.
    Koran
----
Wealth and children are the adornment of life.
    Koran
----
Beyond a critical point within a finite space, freedom diminishes as numbers increase. 
...The human question is not how many can possibly survive within the system, 
but what kind of existence is possible for those who do survive.	
    Frank Herbert	Dune
----
If you think of yourselves as helpless and ineffectual, it is certain that you will 
create a despotic government to be your master. The wise despot, therefore, maintains 
among his subjects a popular sense that they are helpless and ineffectual. , 
    Frank Herbert The Dosadi Experiment 
----
Adults are obsolete children.
    Dr. Seuss
----
I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, 
it's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope.
    Dr. Seuss
----
Look at me! Look at me! Look at me now! It's fun to have fun, but you have to know how!
    Dr. Seuss
----
Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting. So... get on your way
    Dr. Seuss
----
Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not ,  
    Dr Seuss The Lorax
----
What I said never changed anyone. What they understood did.
----
Only Robinson Crusoe had everything done by Friday.
----
War kills men, and men deplore the loss; but war also crushes bad principles and tyrants, and so saves societies.
    Colton
----
Truth, like gold, is to be obtained not by its growth, but by washing away from it all that is not gold.
    Leo Tolstoy
----
It's always useful to know where a friend-and-relation is, whether you want him or whether you don't.
    A. A. Milne ,  Pooh's Little Instruction Book
----
Art can't hurt you.
    Fred Babb
----
When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
Piety requires us to honor truth above our friends.
    Aristotle ,  Nichomachean Ethics
----
It's life, Jim... but not as we know it.
    Spock
----
A whole is that which has beginning, middle and end.
    Aristotle ,  Rhetoric
----
Vulcans never bluff.
    Spock "The Doomsday Machine," stardate 4202.1.
----
Without facts, the decision cannot be made logically. You must rely on your human intuition.
    Spock "Assignment: Earth"
----
Physical laws simply cannot be ignored. Existence cannot be without them.
    Spock "Spectre of the Gun," stardate 4385.3.
----
Thought is the wind, knowledge the sail, and mankind the vessel.
    August Hare
----
Every man is the architect of his own fortune.
    Appius Claudius
----
You can discover what your enemy fears most by observing the means he uses to frighten you.
    Eric Hoffer
----
Government is not reason, it is not eloquence, it is force; 
like fire, a troublesome servant and a fearful master. 
Never for a moment should it be left to irresponsible action.
    George Washington
----
The only time you don't fail is the last time you try anything -- and it works.
    William Strong
----
If you don't find it in the index, look very carefully through the entire catalogue.
    Sears, Roebuck, and Co. ,  Consumer's Guide (1897)
----
Support the strong, give courage to the timid, remind the indifferent, and warn the opposed.
    Whitney M. Young, Jr.
----
A little Consideration, a little Thought for Others, makes all the difference.
    A. A. Milne ,  Pooh's Little Instruction Book
----
A good idea will keep you awake during the morning, but a great idea will keep you awake during the night.
    Marilyn Vos Savant
----
Subdue your appetites, my dears, and you've conquered human nature.
    Charles Dickens
----
Take time to deliberate, but when the time for action has arrived, stop thinking and go in.
    Napoleon Bonaparte
----
Human kind cannot bear much reality.
    T. S. Eliot
----
You can't stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes.
    A. A. Milne ,  Pooh's Little Instruction Book
----
Out of life's school of war: What does not destroy me, makes me stronger.
    Niettzche ,  The Twilight of the Idols (1888)
----
There is no shame in not knowing; the shame lies in not finding out.
    Russian proverb
----
Egotist: A person more interested in himself than in me
    Ambrose Biencea (1842-1914) 
----
"The problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so 
sure of themselves while wiser people are so full of doubt."
    Bertrand Russel (April 6th 1999)
----
"All new technology is rejected and then accepted."
    Isaac Asimov (Apr 19-25)
----
"Look at us. When life has become futile, meaningless, unindurable; it must be allowed to end. 
Can't you see captain, for us the disease is immortality."
    Q (Star Trek: Voyager) (Jun 23-28)
----
"I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones."
    Albert Einstein (Jun 29-Jul 4)
----
"The philosophy of the hunter is that you take only what you need, and you share the rest."
    Leonard George, Tsleilwaututh Chief (Jul 5-11)
----
"To surrender to ignorance and call it God has always been premature, and it remains premature today."
    Isaac Asimov (Oct 23-Nov 3)
----
"The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."
    Albert Einstein (Nov 4-Dec 9)
----
"If the Truth is dynamic; how will it ever be found?"
    Dan Gorski (Sept 23-29)
----
"You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try."
    Beverly Sills (Sept 29-Oct 14)
----
"Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it."
    George Bernard Shaw (Nov 22-Dec 2)
----
The concept of progress acts as a protective mechanism to shield us from the terrors of the future.
    Frank Herbert (Dune) (Feb 9-Mar 11)
----
"There is no sin except stupidity."
    Oscar Wilde
----
"The more corrupt the state, the more numerous the laws."
    Tacitus
----
"Your theory is crazy, but it's not crazy enough to be true."
    Niels Bohr
----
When two elephants fight it is the grass that suffers.
    African Proverb
----
Until lions have their historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunter.
    African Proverb
----
If the enemy within cannot kill us, then the enemy without can do us no harm
    African Proverb
----
The enemy of my enemy is my friend.
    Arabian proverb
----
Every cripple has his own way of walking.
    Brendan Behan
----
If you want happiness for a lifetime - help the next generation.
    Chinese Proverb
----
...a thousand paths and an infinity of dreams. Hopeful, we are halfway to where 
we want to go hopeless, we are lost forever.
    Chinese Proverb
----
That the birds of worry and care fly above your head, this you cannot change,
but that they build nests in your hair,this you can prevent.
    Chinese Proverb
----
If you stand in one place long enough, the world will come to you.
    Chinese Proverb
----
Only after the last tree has been cut down; Only after the last fish has been caught; 
Only after the last river has been poisoned; Only then will you realize that money cannot be eaten.
    Cree Indian Prophecy 
----
We never know the worth of water till the well is dry.
    English Proverb
----
When spiders unite, they can tie down a lion.
    Ethiopian Proverb
----
The frog does not drink up the pond in which it lives
    Indian proverb
----
You have only 2 things to worry about,
either you are sick or you are healthy,
if you are healthy, you have nothing to worry about,
but if you are sick you have 2 things to worry about,
you will get well,
or you will die,
if you get well,
you have nothing to worry about,
but if you die,
you will have 2 things to worry about,
you will go up,or you will go down,
if you go up,
there is nothing to worry about,
but if you go down,
you will be so busy shaking hands with old friends you won't have time to worry!
    Irish Proverb
----
An Irishman is never drunk as long as he can hold onto a blade of grass and not fall off the earth.
    Irish Proverb
----
Dance as if no one's watching, sing as if no one's listening, and live everyday as if it were your last.
    Irish proverb
----
At the end of the game, The king and the pawn go back in the same box.
    Italian Proverb
----
Not everything which is bad comes to hurt us.
    Italian Proverb
----
If you stand up like a nail you will get hammered down.
    Japanese Proverb
----
the reverse side also has a reverse side
    Japanese proverb
----
Vision without action is daydream. Action without vision is nightmare.
    Japanese proverb
----
Fear is only as deep as the mind allows
    Japenese proverb
----
If God lived on earth, people would break his windows.
    Jewish Proverb
----
As long as you have nothing to shoot for, you will always have plenty of ammunition.
    John Ward
----
Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you
    Maori Proverb
----
The generous and bold have the best lives.
    Poetic Edda, a compilation, ca. 1200 AD, of earlier Icelandic poems (19)
----
It is better to live one day as a lion, than a thousand days as a lamb.
    Roman proverb
----
The church is close, but the road is icey. The bar is far, but I will walk carefully.
    Russian Proverb
----
Water that does not move, is always shallow...
    Sami proverb
----
They talk of my drinking but never my thirst
    Scottish Proverb
----
Be humble for you are made of earth. Be noble for you are made of stars.
    Serbian proverb
----
I don't want the cheese, I just want out of the trap.
    Spanish Proverb
----
Whoever gossips to you will gossip about you.
    Spanish proverb
----
Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow.
    Swedish Proverb
----
Fear less, hope more; Whine less, breathe more; 
Talk less, say more; Hate less, love more; 
And all good things are yours.
    Swedish Proverb
----
Faith is to believe in things that we do not see, and the reward of this faith is to see in what we believe.
----
Tell me who's your friend and I'll tell you who you are.
    Russian Proverb
----
Free speech is the right to shout 'theater' in a crowded fire
    A Yippie proverb
----
It is not economical to go to bed early to save the candles if the result is twins.
    Chinese Proverb
----
First I saw the mountains in the painting; then I saw the painting in the mountains.
    Chinese Proverb
----
Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.
----
If it keeps you awake, its art; if it puts you to sleep, its a drug.
----
There are two kinds of people _ those who run and those who should!
----
the same people wrote the bible that thought the world was flat
----
Let's Ban Humans. They All Suck Anyway.
----
If nothing ever changed, there'd be no butterflies.
----
Trust but verify.
----
When the Czar has a cold all Russia coughs. 
----
Don't buy the house, buy the neighborhood.
----
A half-truth is a whole lie
----
Among those who stand, do not sit; among those who sit, do not stand. 
Among those who laugh, do not weep; among those who weep, do not laugh
----
Anyone who teases you loves you
----
Ask about your neighbors, then buy the house
----
Be sure to send a lazy man for the angel of death
----
Do not ask questions of fairy tales
----
Do not make yourself so big, you are not so small
----
Do not meet troubles half-way
----
Don't be too sweet lest you be eaten up; don't be too bitter lest you be spewed out
----
Don't look a gift horse in the mouth
----
Don't make a mountain out of a molehill
----
Don't open a shop unless you know how to smile
----
God could not be everywhere and therefore he made mothers
----
He who puts up with insult invites injury
----
If the rich could hire someone else to die for them, the poor would make a wonderful living
----
If you can't go over, you must go under
----
In a restaurant choose a table near a waiter
----
Never trust people who tell you all their troubles but keep from you all their joys
----
Prepare your proof before you argue
----
Pride is the mask of one's own faults
----
Pride joined with many virtues chokes them all
----
Pride that dined with vanity supped with poverty
----
"Rejoice not at thine enemy's fall"--but don't rush to pick his up, either
----
The innkeeper loves a drunkard, but not for a son-in-law
----
The only truly dead are those who have been forgotten
----
What you don't see with your eyes, don't invent with your mouth
----
What you give for the cause of charity in health is gold; what you give in 
sickness is silver; what you give after death is lead
----
When two divorced people marry, four people get into bed
----
When you have no choice, mobilize the spirit of courage
----
With money in your pocket you are wise, you are handsome, and you sing well too
----
You can't force anyone to love you or lend you money
----
Your friend has a friend; don't tell him
----
A little fire burns up a great deal of corn
----
A rich man has no need of character
----
Admission by the defendant is worth a hundred witnesses
----
An advantage of poverty: your relatives gain nothing by your death
----
Education is what most receive, many pass on, and few possess.
    Karl Kraus
----
Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. 
If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.
    Herman Cain
----
If you obey all of the rules, you miss all of the fun.
    Katherine Hepburn
----
What you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others.
    Confucius ,  The Confucian Analects
----
The most precious gift we can offer others is our presence. 
When mindfulness embraces those we love, they will bloom like flowers.
    Thich Nhat Hanh
----
Daring ideas are like chessmen moved forward. They may be beaten, but they may start a winning game.
    Goethe
----
In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very 
angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
    Douglas Adams
----
A penny will hide the biggest star in the Universe if you hold it close enough to your eye.
    Samuel Grafton
----
We must become the change we want to see.
    Mahatma Gandhi
----
The leader has to be practical and a realist, yet must talk the language of the visionary and the idealist.
    Eric Hoffer
----
Conservation is humanity caring for the future.
    Nancy Newhall
----
The worst-tempered people I've ever met were the people who knew they were wrong.
    Wilson Mizner
----
A myth is a religion in which no one any longer believes.
    James Feibleman
----
We've gotten to the point where everybody's got a right and nobody's got a responsibility.
    Newton Minow
----
Failure to prepare is preparing to fail.
----
Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things.
    Peter Drucker
----
Oh, my friend, it's not what they take away from you that counts. It's what you do with what you have left.
    Hubert Humphrey
----
Change should be a friend. It should happen by plan, not by accident.
    Philip Crosby ,  Reflections on Quality
----
5 out of 2 people are dyslexic
Dyslexics of the world: untie!
----
The optimist thinks this is the best of all possible worlds.
The pessimist fears it is true. 
----
Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...
----
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you ever tried.
----
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help
section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
----
Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Corruption is a crime.
Crime doesn't pay. So if you keep studying you'll go broke! 
----
If smoking is so bad for you, how come it cures kippers?
----
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day, teach a man how to fish, 
and he will sit in a boat drinking beer all day... 
----
The only two things that are infinite in size are the universe and
human stupidity. And I'm not completely sure about the universe.
    Albert Einstein 
----
I knew it would be in the last place I looked for it, so I looked there first. 
----
Here's a horrible thought: You know how dumb the average person is? Well, 
half the human race is even dumber than that... 
----
Love between a man and a woman can be a beautiful thing, 
especially if you're between the right man and the right woman.
    Woody Allen 
----
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
----
If Bill Gates got a nickel every time some version of Windows crashed or frustrated, 
he's be the richest man in the world!
----
Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant! 
----
It was a woman that drove me to drink. Such a shame I forgot to thank her
----
The I.S.O. standard unit of female pulchritude is the milli-helen. 
This is the amount of beauty capable of causing the launching of a single ship.
----
Women are like pianos - When they're not upright they're grand. 
----
It's a dog eat dog world out there..... And vice versa.
----
I love being a writer. What I can't stand is the paperwork
    Peter DeVries.
----
If you can't beat them, join them, then beat them. 
----
If you were going to shoot a mime - would you use a silencer?
----
We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act, but a habit.
    Aristotle
----
The concept of relative ethics is truly a tribute to the human mind, and man's ability to delude himself.
----
Men will send one perfect rose, without realising a girl's need for one perfect limo.
    Dorothy L. Parker
----
If scientists are so clever, what is the speed of dark?
----
    God Is Perfect,
    Man Is Not,
Man Made Alcohol,
God Made Pot !!!!
----
Windows: A 32 bit extension and graphical shell, 
for a 16 bit patch to an 8 bit operating system, 
originally coded for a 4 bit microprocessor, 
written by a 2 bit company, that can't stand 1 bit of competition. 
Good thing there's not any.
----
It's hard to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
----
You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.
    Albert Einstein 
----
Never explain. Your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway.
----
If at first you don't succeed, give up skydiving.
----
A man is not truly drunk until he can't lie on the floor without holding on.
----
"One only needs two tools in life: WD-40 to make things go, and duct tape to make them stop." 
    G. Weilacher 
----
We have enough youth, how about a fountain of smart?
----
If at first you don't succeed, call it version 1.0
----
A good storyteller is a person who has a good memory and hopes other people haven't.
----
You are a fluke of the universe; you have no right to be here, 
and whether you can hear it or not, 
the universe is laughing behind your back. 
----
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else. 
----
If vegetarians eat vegetables, beware of humanitarians!
----
Most computer problems are caused by a loose nut between the chair and the keyboard.
----
Why do clairvoyants need doorbells ?
----
Where do you want to tell Microsoft to go today?
----
Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps.
----
Help me to be careful of the toes I step on today As they may be 
connected to the ass that I may have to kiss tomorrow.
----
I have a firm grip of reality - now I can strangle it.... 
----
Experts eliminate the simpler mistakes in favor of the more complex ones, 
thereby achieving a higher degree of stupidity. 
----
People who claim they don't let little things bother them have never slept in a room with a single mosquito. 
----
Just because I have a short attention span doesn't mean I
----
The day Microsoft makes something that doesn't suck is probably the day they start making vacuum cleaners......
----
Life would be much easier if I had the source code. 
----
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
----
Happiness is a journey, not a destination.
Work like you don't need the money Love like you've never been hurt And dance like no one's watching
----
If you have nothing to hide, why do you use an envelope?
----
Homo Sapiens is a goal, not a description.
----
Early to rise, early to bed, makes you healthy but socially dead. 
----
Unfinished business - business that is finished, but you don't like the way it turned out.
----
Remember half the people you know are below average. 
----
I am in shape. Round is a shape.
----
You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoes and wonder
what else you can do while you're down there. 
----
There are three kinds of people in the world.
Those who can count and those who can't. 
----
"Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen."
    Albert Einstein
----
Everyone thinks I'm psychotic, except for my friends deep inside the earth.
----
If the gods had meant for mankind to fly, they wouldn't have made the ground so hard, or so far down.
----
Eagles soar but a weasel will never get sucked into a jet engine. 
----
Moore's Law: hardware speed doubles every 18 months
Gates' Law: software speed halves every 18 months
----
At first there was nothing. Then God said 'Let there be light!'
Then there was still nothing. But you could see it.
----
Suburbia: where they tear down all the trees and name streets after them.
----
Money doesn't make you happy, but money can buy gizmos and gizmos make you happy.
----
If voting could change the system, it would be illegal.
If not voting could change the system, it would be illegal.
----
Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the reader who doesn't get it. 
----
I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one:
"O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous." And God granted it.
----
I started out with nothing,and I`ve still got most of it left.
----
I'm not a complete idiot; some parts are missing.
----
Luck is when opportunity meets preparation.
----
I found out what serendipity meant by accident. 
----
To a Pessimist, the glass is half empty.
To an Optimist, the glass is half full.
To an Engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
----
Be aloof, there has been a recent population explosion of lerts. 
----
Doesn't it bother you that we have to search for intelligent life
    OUT THERE??
----
Tact: the ability to describe others as they see themselves.
----
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?
----
Conscience: That part of the psyche that dissolves in alcohol.
----
I don't practice what I preach, because I'm not the kind of person I'm preaching to.
----
There are two secrets for success.
    1: Don't reveal all your secrets
    2:
----
Breast size multiplied by IQ always equals 69.
----
What we need is either less corruption, or more chance to participate in it.
----
There are basically three kinds of men. 
There are the ones who learn by reading. 
Then there are the few who learn by observation. 
The rest just have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.
----
What is a rhetorical question?
----
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
----
Even in the worst of times, there is always someone who's never had it better.
Even in the best of times, there is always someone who's never had it worse.
----
Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
----
Subtlety is the art of saying what you think and getting out of the way before it is understood.
----
A lawyer is an expert on justice the way a whore is an expert on love.
----
God, grant me the Senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, 
the Good Fortune to run into the ones I do, And the Eyesight to tell the difference.
----
Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected us as kids, 
we'd all run around in a darkened room munching pills and listening to repetitive music.
----
A bus station is where a bus stops.
A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station........
----
Windows error messages in Haiku #2:
    Serious error. All shortcuts have disappeared. Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
----
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
----
Bigamy is having one too many wives. Monogamy is the same.
----
Got kleptomania? Take something for it.
----
A Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer is to computing what a 
McDonalds Certified Food Specialist is to fine cuisine.
----
If God had meant carrots to be eaten cooked, He would have given rabbits fire.
----
Claiming that your operating system is the best in the world because more people use it 
is like saying that McDonalds makes the best food in the world.
----
A real friend isn't someone you use once and then throw away.
A real friend is someone you can use over and over again.
----
There's an old proverb that says just about whatever you want it to say.
----
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
----
Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.
----
The sooner you fall behind, the more time you have to catch up.
----
Veni, Vidi, Visa. (I came, I saw, I bought.)
----
People say that I suffer from insanity. Actually, I enjoy every minute of it.
----
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, 
the courage to change the things I can, and the weaponry to make the difference stick!
----
God must have loved calories, she made so many of them.
----
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
----
UNIX is not user-unfriendly; it merely expects users to be computer-friendly.
----
Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once.
Space is nature's way of keeping it all from happening to you.
----
Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW.
----
Smith & Wesson: THE original point and click interface...
----
If a man says something in the middle of a forest and there isn't a woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
----
There are 10 kinds of people in the world:
    those who understand binary,and those who don't
----
I think the last place I'd like to be beamed is 'Up Scotty'
----
Half of being smart is knowing what you're dumb at.
----
The golden rule: he who has the gold, makes the rules.
----
Somebody ought to cross ball point pens with coat hangers so that the pens will multiply instead of disappear.
----
We've heard that a million monkeys bashing away at a million 
keyboards could produce a complete Shakespearian work Now, 
thanks to the internet, we know this is not true.
----
When did I realize I was God?
Well, I was praying, and noticed that I was talking to myself.
----
Having a smoking section in a restaurant is like having a peeing section in a swimming pool.
----
Any philosophy that can be put "in a nutshell" belongs in one.
----
Mathematicians, please don't drink and derive.
----
We will have solar energy as soon as the utility companies solve one technical problem -- 
how to run a sunbeam through a meter.
----
Mornings: Evolution in action. Only the grumpy will survive.
----
The problem with the world is stupidity. 
Not saying there should be a capital punishment for stupidity, 
but why don't we just take the safety labels off of everything and let the problem solve itself?
----
The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a little longer.
    Henry Kissinger (1923 - ), New York Times, Oct. 28, 1973
----
What is food to one man is bitter poison to others.
    Lucretius (96 BC - 55 BC)
----
#3537. Superfluity does not vitiate.
    California Civil Code, "Maxims of Jurisprudence"
----
He who thinks by the inch and talks by the yard deserves to be kicked by the foot.
----
To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.
    Farmers' Almanac, 1978
----
Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.
    Albert Schweitzer (1875 - 1965)
----
It is after you have lost your teeth that you can afford to buy steaks.
    Pierre Auguste Renoir
----
It should be our care not so much to live a long life as a satisfactory one.
    Seneca (5 BC - 65)
----
Don't take life too seriously. You'll never get out of it alive.
    Elbert Hubbard (1856 - 1915)
----
Not even the gods fight against necessity.
    Simonides (556 BC - 468 BC), from Plato, Dialogues, Protagoras
----
We have a criminal jury system which is superior to any in the world; 
and its efficiency is only marred by the difficulty of finding twelve 
men every day who don't know anything and can't read.
    Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
----
He has a splendid repertoire of 500 words. Why does he insist on using only 150?
    Abba Eban (1915 - 2002)
----
"If wishes were horses, beggars would ride."
    James Halliwell, Nursery Rhymes of England, 1844
----
"When I find myself in the company of scientists, I feel like a 
shabby curate who has strayed by mistake into a room full of dukes."
    W. H. Auden
----
"That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind."
    Neil Armstrong, On the first moonwalk, July 20, 1969
----
Thats one small code in perl, one giant leap in computing time.
    Ido Kanner - After making a quotation reader in perl
----
"There is still no cure for the common birthday."
    John Glenn
----
"The guy with the biggest stomach will be the first to take off his shirt at a baseball game."
    Glenn Dickey
----
"No one is entitled to the truth."
    E. Howard Hunt
----
"If all mankind minus one were of one opinion, mankind would be no more 
justified in silencing that one person than he, if he had the power, 
would be justified in silencing mankind."
    John Stuart Mill
----
"An expert is someone who knows more and more about less and less, 
until eventually he knows everything about nothing."
----
Harry: Yeah I called her up, she gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her, 
or something, I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
    Dumb & Dumber (1994), Dumb & Dumber
----
"Most people would rather be certain they're miserable, than risk being happy."
    Robert Anthony
----
"Love means never having to say you're sorry."
    Erich Segal
----
"There are only two ways to live your life. 
One is as though nothing is a miracle. 
The other is as though everything is a miracle."
    Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
----
"There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it."
    Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
----
"Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing."
    Wernher Von Braun (1912-1977)
----
"The truth is more important than the facts."
    Frank Lloyd Wright (1868-1959)
----
"The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them."
    Mark Twain (1835-1910)
----
"I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need."
    Francois-Auguste Rodin (1840-1917), when asked how he managed to make his remarkable statues
----
"Interesting - I use a Mac to help me design the next Cray."
    Seymoure Cray (1925-1996) when he was told that Apple Inc. 
	        had recently bought a Cray supercomputer to help them design the next Mac.
----
"A poem is never finished, only abandoned."
    Paul Valery (1871-1945)
----
"I worship the quicksand he walks in."
    Art Buchwald
----
"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
    Irvin S. Cobb
----
"He would make a lovely corpse."
    Charles Dickens (1812-1870)
----
"Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies."
    Voltaire (1694-1778) on his deathbed in response to a priest asking that he renounce Satan.
----
"This isn't right, this isn't even wrong."
    Wolfgang Pauli (1900-1958), upon reading a young physicist's paper
----
"Woman was God's second mistake."
    Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)
----
"God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time."
    Robin Williams, commenting on the Clinton/Lewinsky affair
----
"I criticize by creation - not by finding fault."
    Cicero (106-43 B.C.)
----
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
    Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
----
"There's many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher."
    Flannery O'Connor (1925-1964)
----
"There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, 
not a natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; 
it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend the whole."
    Bill Wulf
----
"Half this game is ninety percent mental."
    Yogi Berra
----
"We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees."
    Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks
----
"The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep."
    Clinton aide George Stephanopolous speaking on Larry King Live
----
"Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame."
    Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)
----
"It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both."
    Niccolo Machiavelli (1469-1527), "The Prince"
----
"It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog."
    Mark Twain (1835-1910)
----
"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense."
    Tom Clancy
----
"The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins."
    Oliver Wendell Holmes (1841-1935)
----
"Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something."
    last words of Pancho Villa (1877-1923)
----
"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know."
    Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865)
----
"After I'm dead I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one."
    Cato the Elder (234-149 BC, AKA Marcus Porcius Cato)
----
"A pint of sweat, saves a gallon of blood."
    General George S. Patton (1885-1945)
----
"Denial ain't just a river in Egypt."
    Mark Twain (1835-1910)
----
"Everything that can be invented has been invented."
    Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899
----
"We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out."
    Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962
----
"Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?"
    H. M. Warner (1881-1958), founder of Warner Brothers, in 1927
----
"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."
    Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977
----
"Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity."
    Irving Kristol
----
"The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy."
    Von Clausewitz (1780-1831)
----
"If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?" 
    Will Rogers (1879-1935)
----
"I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!"
    Will Rogers (1879-1935)
----
"I think it would be a good idea."
    Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948), when asked what he thought of Western civilization
----
"I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."
    Thomas Watson (1874-1956), Chairman of IBM, 1943
----
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty."
    Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
----
"There is a country in Europe where multiple-choice tests are illegal."
    Sigfried Hulzer
----
"The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready."
    Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862)
----
"Sometimes it is not enough to our best; we must do what is required."
    Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
----
"Dogma is the sacrifice of wisdom to consistency."
    Lewis Perelman
----
"Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century."
    Lewis Perelman
----
"A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted."
    Helen Rowland (1876-1950)
----
"The average person thinks he isn't."
    Father Larry Lorenzoni
----
"Well done is better than well said."
    Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)
----
"Silence is argument carried out by other means."
    Ernesto"Che"Guevara (1928-1967)
----
"The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, 
and that all the pains that I have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time."
    George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)
----
"Never mistake motion for action."
    Ernest Hemingway (1899-1961)
----
"A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar."
    Lao-Tzu (570?-490? BC)
----
"Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting."
    Karl Wallenda
----
"It is better to be quotable than to be honest."
    Tom Stoppard
----
<Jv8> programming has destroyed my ability to speak English
    Bash.org - #2575
----
[02:18:04] s7ank: i want to be one of those guys that types
"s/j&jd//.^$ueu*///djsls/sm."
and it's a perl script that turns dog crap into gold.
    Bash.org - #9347
----
<Zero> I had a totally hot chemistry teacher once. She used to always say "Uh huh." and show her ass. Win XP is like that.
    Bash.org - #10071
----
<GrndZero> "China has already cloned human embryos"
<GrndZero> Go china
<xscope> yeah..thats what China needs..more people.
    Bash.org - #77413
----
<pronstar``afk> my kazaa preformed an illegal opperation
<cCCPehlet`> isn't that what kazaa is designed to do?
    Bash.org - #147270
----
<EnoC> sex should be like a honda slow obsene and loud enough for the neighbors to hear
    Bash.org - #83176
----
<m[e]ntor> Does anyone know where I can buy 100 m of wireless lan cable?
<insight> Well, you could try NASA's "things not yet and never will be invented"-department or something.
    Bash.org - #125928
----
<Kris> fuck!  someone stole all my beer and drank it and left the empties all over my apartment!
<Kris> either that or I now know why I have a headache and no real memory of anything after 21:00
    Bash.org - #187608
----
<billiam> crap... some one knocked over my recycle bin... there's icons all over my desktop...
    Bash.org - #216963
----
<drewb> I still dont get how you can use linux when it doesnt have a control panel
<jamesm> well duh, use xeyes
    Bash.org - #8677
----
* Cheez is now known as rwxr-xr-x
<MudBlud> ./Cheez
    Bash.org - #55095
----
<tag> Ouroboros: lets play Pong
<Ouroboros> Ok.
<tag> |    .
<Ouroboros> .    |
<tag> |  .
<Ouroboros>    . |
<tag> | .
<Ouroboros>      | .
<Ouroboros> Whoops
    Bash.org - #9322
----
<mironixima> hello
<mironixima> any redhat 9 users in here?
<SKaReCRoW> let's hope not
    Bash.org - #105735
----
private\windows\media\avi\verinfo.16\verinfo.h:

    *       !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    *       !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    * !!!!!!!IF YOU CHANGE TABS TO SPACES, YOU WILL BE KILLED!!!!!!!
    *       !!!!!!!!!!!!!!DOING SO FUCKS THE BUILD PROCESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    *       !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    *       !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

    Seen at: http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2004/2/15/71552/7795 - leaked Windows 2000 source
----
private\genx\shell\inc\prsht.w:
// we are such morons. Wiz97 underwent a redesign between IE4 and IE5

    Seen at: http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2004/2/15/71552/7795 - leaked Windows 2000 source
----
private\shell\ext\ftp\ftpdrop.cpp:
//We have to do this only because Exchange is a moron.

    Seen at: http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2004/2/15/71552/7795 - leaked Windows 2000 source
----
private\shell\shdoc401\unicpp\desktop.cpp:
// We are morons. We changed the IDeskTray interface between IE4

    Seen at: http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2004/2/15/71552/7795 - leaked Windows 2000 source
----
private\inet\wininet\urlcache\filemgr.cxx:
// ACHTUNG!!! this is a special hack for IBM antivirus software

    Seen at: http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2004/2/15/71552/7795 - leaked Windows 2000 source
----
/*
* nesting deeper and deeper, harder and harder, go, go, oh, OH, OHHHH!!
* Sorry, got carried away there.
*/
struct lo_FormElementOptionData_struct { 
    Seen at: http://discuss.fogcreek.com/joelonsoftware/default.asp?cmd=show&ixPost=3364
----
/* IWDFWI */

Translation: It works, don't fuck with it.

                                             Mike Gunderloy
                                        Saturday, February 02, 2002 

    Seen at: http://discuss.fogcreek.com/joelonsoftware/default.asp?cmd=show&ixPost=3364
----
// Hocus Pocus, grab the focus
    winSetFocus(...)

    Seen at: http://c2.com/cgi/wiki?FunnyThingsSeenInSourceCodeAndDocumentation
----
    try {
    //...
    } catch (SecurityException sex) {

    Seen at: http://c2.com/cgi/wiki?FunnyThingsSeenInSourceCodeAndDocumentation
----
Real Programmers consider "what you see is what you get" to be just as 
bad a concept in Text Editors as it is in women. No, the Real Programmer
wants a "you asked for it, you got it" text editor -- complicated, 
cryptic, powerful, unforgiving, dangerous.
----
And as a bonus the recovery CD includes a fully-functioning tetris game.
    Tzafrir Cohen - seen on hamakor mailling list
----
These download files are in Microsoft Word 6.0 format. 
After unzipping, these files can be viewed in any text editor, 
including all versions of Microsoft Word, WordPad, and Microsoft Word Viewer.
    From Microsoft's Website
----
YASFPIIAS
Yet Another SourceForge Project In Its Alpha Stage
----
Email law #1:
A second after you close your email client, a new email will arrive
----
Email law #2:
The second you open your mail client a junk mail will arrive
----
Email law #3:
When you want to send an important attachment the email will always be sent without it.
----
Email law #4:
When you are waiting for important email, it will always located on the spam directory.
----
Email law #5:
When you think you configured your junk mail filter correctly, a new way will be found to send you junk.
----
#!/bin/bash
# written by darren kirby

You="R_a_dream"
Are="you_really_there?"
let Me=make love; To="u"
i="long"; FOR="you"
Not="meant_2_b"
for the_stars in the sky and the light from The moon
do #not forget...I will
        echo "I love you" # 'til I am
done #in from the heartache
declare -i am_in_love
if [[ -n $You ]] && [[ -n $Are ]] && [[ -n $Not ]]; then # I will
        echo "I love you anyway" # till
fi #naly I am free
----
" ...draining workplace productivity since 1996" 
    from freecell.com
----
If you ever see me getting beaten by the police, put down the video camera and come help me.
    Bobcat Goldthwait
----
I bet if Zebras tasted like Zebra Cakes there would be a lot less vegetarians.
    Ben Wipperman
----
Insanity Is The Fuel For The Mind
    HalonX
----
The dark is not mysterious; it is merely dark.
    Archibald MacLeish
----
I want to know Gods thoughts, the rest are details.
    Albert Einstein
----
640K ought to be enough for anybody.
    Bill Gates
----
Its hard to expect people to think outside of the box when they cant find their way to the other side of a dot.
    Keith J. Beange
----
A liberal is a man too broadminded to take his own side in an argument.
    Robert Frost
----
Life is a comedy to those who think, and a tragedy to those who feel.
    Moliere
----
If you see Buddha coming down the road, kill him
    Buddha
----
Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.
    Lily Tomlin
----
Dream as if youll live forever. Live as if youll die today.
    James Dean
----
They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.
    Benjamin Franklin
----
I came here to be drugged, electricuted and probed, not insulted!
    Homer Simpson
----
Humans dont know this but due to the war among the angels, heavens closed. Nobody who has died since the beginning of time has made it in. Sorry. All those bones just lying there! But, Hell! While heaven may be closed, I am open all year round, even on Christmas.
    Lucifer, from the movie Prophecy
----
Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
    Homer Simpson
----
Just because you are paranoid doesnt mean theyre not after you.
    Kurt Cobain
----
Common sense is genius dressed in its working clothes.
    Ralph Waldo Emerson
----
Sacred cows make the best hamburger.
    Mark Twain
----
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity
    badfish
----
He who has seen the end of war.. is dead.
    Plato
----
I shouldve been a plumber.
    Albert Einstein
----
In war-time.. .truth is so precious that she should always be attended by a bodyguard of lies.
    Winston Churchill
----
Listen! You smell something?
    Ray Stanz (Ghostbuster)
----
Imagination is more important than knowledge.
    Albert Einstein
----
Some guy hit me in the fender the other day. I told him to go forth an prosper fruitfully on his own. Only not in those words.
    Woody Allen
----
It is foolish to tear ones hair in grief, as though sorrow would be made less by baldness.
    Cicero
----
If you have Brains in your head and feet in your shoes you can do any thing
    Dr. Suess
----
Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
    Aldous Huxley
----
Just because I'm paranoid, doesn't mean they aren't after me.
    Lazarus Long
----
One day when I was little, and my parents were having a party, I went around to all the adults and said, drink this and it will make you grow. They all laughed and said I was cute. Then I went to the coat-room and hemmed all their coats.
    Steven Wright
----
I did not get my Spaghetti-Os, I got spaghetti. I want the press to know this. ( Last words before being executed. )
    Thomas J. Grasso
----
Freedom is a feeling you celebrate with the world. Lets make cakes, not weapons. Lets visit the plastic surgeon and replace our arms with wings. This may cost a lot of money.
    Diesel
----
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the people in his car.
----
Ive been in a bad mood for the past couple of years, so why dont you just leave me alone?
    Wyatt Earp
----
Life is like a roll of toilet paper. When it come close to the end, it goes faster.
    Ciara
----
Tell a man there are 300 Billion stars in the universe and hell believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and hell have to touch to be sure.
    Jarger
----
They are GODS... just like Ted Nugent!
    Michael Smith
----
Whining is anger through a small opening.
    Stuart Smalley
----
Arrogance is a form of ignorance.
    Troy Johnson
----
Your random quote from 324 quotes, is:
Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tellem, Certainly I can! - and get busy and find out how to do it.
    Theodore Roosevelt
----
Why is it that when we talk to God were said to be praying, but when God talks to us were schizophrenic?
    Lily Tomlin 
----
"Those that can, do. Those that can't, complain".
    Linus Torvalds
----
"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we 
... 
We must never stop thinking about how best to defend our country. We must always be forward-thinking"
    George W. Bush - In a speech in 06/08/2004
----
"Life, liberty, and the pursuit of spelling errors."
    The Hspell Project
----
"All I can tell you is that pictures come into my head and I write stories about them."
    C. S. Lewis
----
"A neurotic is the man who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the man who lives in it. A psychiatrist is the man who collects the rent."
    Jerome Lawrence
----
"Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind."
    Rudyard Kipling
----
"Scientists theorize about the possibilty of going to the stars, poets go there."
    Albatross
----
"I'd deflower you, but i'm an environmentalist."
    Neils Weilander
----
"I laugh, I smile, and I take Prozac."
    Jocelyn
----
"Any couple who can blush in unison deserve each other."
    Columbine
----
"You know it's love when you memorize her IP number to skip DNS overhead."
    Tarik John Dozier
----
"You know you've been on NetGoth too long when you're overjoyed whenever you get email that doesn't start with a Re:"
    Lex
----
"Work is the curse of the drinking class."
    Oscar Wilde
----
"Friends don't let friends...go to clubs dressed like The Crow."
----
"May the rocks below be merciless and jagged."
    Eileen (Individuation)
----
"There is no cause so noble, that one cannot find fools following it."
----
"He's YOUR god,
They're YOUR rules,
YOU burn in hell."
    Locutus
----
"Uncle Cosmo ... why do they call this a word processor?"
"It's simple, Skyler ... you've seen what food processors do to food, right?"
    MacNelley, "Shoe"
----
"Spare no expense to save money on this one."
    Samuel Goldwyn
----
"Jesus save sinners and redeems them for valuable prizes!"
    Locutus
----
"Life is one big ink blot."
    Leanan Sidhe (Charlotte Ashley)
----
"But it doesn't matter because we're all doomed."
    Eric Parks
----
"I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it."
    Oscar Wilde
----
"I don't have any solution, but I certainly admire the problem."
    Oscar Wilde
----
"By doing just a little every day, I can gradually let the task completely overwhelm me."
    Oscar Wilde
----
"Maybe I'm lucky to be going so slowly, because I may be going in the wrong direction."
    Oscar Wilde
----
"America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between."
    Oscar Wilde
----
"Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child."
    Former Vice President Dan Quayle
----
"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
    J. Danforth Quayle
----
"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change."
    Former Vice President Dan Quayle, 5/22/89
----
"People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history."
    Former Vice President Dan Quayle
----
"I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican."
    Vice President Dan Quayle
----
"TIAC tech support: stealing idiots from villages everywhere."
    Purp
----
"TIAC Human resources: stealing idiots from villages everywhere."
    Ned Brickley
----
"Art is a telling of stories and drumming is one of the earliest forms of that art."
    Neil Peart
----
"Love is the triumph of imagination over the intelligence."
    Danny Cevidanes
----
"If I hammered a three-way plug adapter into my skull and plugged my head into a wall-socket I'd certainly be getting a lot more intellectual stimulation than I'm getting now."
    Kara Bunting
----
"Success didn't spoil me; I've always been insufferable."
    Fran Lebowitz
----
"If you're going to have delusions, you may as well go for the really satisfying ones."
    Marcus Cole, Babylon 5
----
"All of God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable."
    Fran Lebowitz
----
"Think of how stupid the average person is. Now realize that by definition HALF of the population is even STUPIDER."
    Lex
----
"I can resist everything except temptation."
    Oscar Wilde
----
"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away."
    Philip K. Dick
----
"Coincidences are spiritual puns."
    G. K. Chesterton
----
"Conscious is when you are aware of something and conscience is when you wish you weren't."
----
"I had to hit him -- he was starting to make sense."
----
"I'm having an emotional outburst!!"
----
"Hey! I don't steal - I gave that up!"
    Steve B.
----
"The closet upstairs: If you can only rub it in one direction, we carry it!"
    Lex
----
"Democracy is a government where you can say what you think even if you don't think."
----
"However, never daunted, I will cope with adversity in my traditional manner ... sulking and nausea."
    Tom K. Ryan
----
"If God had meant for us to be in the Army, we would have been born with green, baggy skin."
----
"Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform."
    Mark Twain
----
"Not only is this incomprehensible, but the ink is ugly and the paper is from the wrong kind of tree."
    Professor W.
----
"This is a test of the Emergency Broadcast System. If this had been an actual emergency, do you really think we'd stick around to tell you?"
----
"Sometimes I simply feel that the whole world is a cigarette and I'm the only ashtray."
----
"You can't have everything. Where would you put it?"
    Steven Wright
----
"A day without sunshine is like night."
----
"So many rednecks, so little time..."
    Kaos
----
"Heh heh death chicks are cool. They do weird sex stuff."
    Beavis and Butt-Head
----
"I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it."
    Chyle
----
"It just can't be illegal to kill someone that incompetent!"
    ISP owner/sysadmin after speaking with Nynex
----
"He who cannot lie, knows not what truth is."
    Nietzche
----
"Everybody has a right to be stupid, but some people abuse the privilege."
    Joseph Stalin
----
"It's cool! It's groovy! It's got penguins! And wibbly bits!"
    Pete Scathe
----
"Anything is art if an artist says it is."
    Marcel Ducham
----
"I'm a bisexual polyamorous pervert, but I STILL won't sleep with YOU."
    David Gerard
----
"We are painted. Fear us."
    Grimly The Invisible
----
"I'd like to change your mind by hitting it with a rock."
    They Might Be Giants
----
"If I painted my turtle black, would it be spooky?"
    Jhonen Vasquez, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac
----
"Reality is frequently inaccurate."
    Douglas Adams
----
"Hey, this train doesn't talk!"
    Rav3n
----
"It's like a crack pipe for smart people."
    Chat room fanatic Arsenio Hall, talking about the Internet
----
"Punk isn't dead, its waiting in ambush. "
    Jeff-boy
----
"Life doesn't throw me curve balls. It just hits me with the bat."
    Jealousy
----
"Every once in a while, it's a good idea to call out 'Computer, end program,' just to check."
    Dave Noelle
----
"High School is full of morons. Unfortunately most of them TEACH us."
    Scott Murray and Iain Conliffe
----
"I hate you all and I hope you have snacks!"
    Mystery Science Theater 3000
----
"You sir have just crossed my happy line...."
    Timmie
----
"What a cute little cemetery!"
    Edvamp
----
"Stick. Electric. Poke. Cow go Zzzt Zzzt."
    Peter Nielsen
----
"Should I come over and squeak until you fall asleep?"
    Dennis, to Noah
----
"A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn."
----
"The intelligent man finds almost everything ridiculous, the sensible man hardly anything."
    Goethe
----
"Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth."
    John F. Kennedy
----
"The dreams of youth are the regrets of maturity."
    Darkness, Legend
----
"First things first, but not necessarily in that order."
    Doctor Who
----
"And you must always remember there's one good thing about being trapped down here: it'll save funeral expenses."
    Puddleglum
----
It doesn't matter what temperature a room is; it's always room temperature
----
Not all those who wander are lost....
----
"The only religion I know is Love."
    Mahatma Ghandi
----
"The Moral Law tells us the tune we have to play: our instincts are merely the keys."
    C S Lewis
----
"Human beings, all over the earth, have this curious idea that they ought to behave in a certain way, and can't really get rid of it."
    C S Lewis
----
"Who can endure a doctrine which would allow only dentists to say whether our teeth were aching, only cobblers to say whether our shoes hurt us, and only governments to tell us whether we were being well governed?"
    C S Lewis
----
...Sooner or later you're going to realize just as I did that there's a difference between knowing the path and walking the path. 
    From The Matrix
----
"Aim at heaven and you will get earth thrown in. Aim at earth and you get neither."
      Clive Staples Lewis (1898-1963), British writer, critic, "Allegory of Love," "The Chronicles of Narnia"
----
"Notice the waves, each moving in its own order, predictable, unchanging. But drop in a single stone and see how the pattern changes. Everything around it is altered."
      Ambassador Delenn to Sinclair in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"On my world, there are books, thousands of pages, about the power of one mind to change the Universe, but none said it as clearly as this."
    Delenn to Sinclair in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"Damn. You see, it's your fault. You're bad luck. I've always said that about him. Now, come on, come on. Look, you're a security chief. Shouldn't you be out securing something?"
    Londo to Garibaldi in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"Even for an alien, this one is pretty alien."
    Dr. Kyle to Sinclair about Kosh in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"We have unlimited manpower and the will to use it! Can you imagine what we could achieve together?"
"I can, which is why it must never be allowed to happen."
    G'Kar and Delenn in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"You make very good sharks, Mr. Garibaldi. We were pretty good sharks ourselves once, but somehow, along the way, we forgot how to bite. There was a time when this whole quadrant belonged to us. What are we now? Twelve worlds and a thousand monuments to past glories. Living off memories and stories, selling trinkets."
    Londo to Garibaldi in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"My god, man. We've become a tourist attraction. 'See the great Centauri Republic -- open 9 to 5, Earth time.'"
    Londo to Garibaldi in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"I haven't broken the rules in a long time, doctor, so I guess .. I'm about due."
    Takashima to Dr. Kyle in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"Michael, I picked you because you are right for the job. You are not politicking, you are not subtle, and sometimes you are a pain in the ass. And I wouldn't have it any other way."
    Sinclair to Garibaldi in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"There is a hole .. in your mind."
    The Assassin to Sinclair in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"Commander, this little breach of security isn't going to affect my Christmas bonus, is it?"
    Garibaldi to Sinclair in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"Delenn, just before he died, the Minbari assassin looked at me and said: 'There's a hole in your mind.'"
"An old Minbari insult. Nothing you need worry about."
    Sinclair and Delenn in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"I would never tell you anything that was not in your best interest."
    Delenn to Sinclair in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"A poem: a story in meter or rhyme."
"Ahh. 'There once was a man from Nantucket..'"
"You've been talking to Garibaldi again, haven't you?"
    Delenn and Sinclair in Babylon 5:"The Gathering"
----
"All I'm asking is that you trust me."
"Trust you? Londo, my brain will be five days dead before I ever trust a Centauri. The first time we met you people, the first time we met any other civilization, you told us you practically ran the entire galaxy."
    Londo and Garibaldi in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"Appearances aside, we are two completely different species."
"A clerical error."
    Garibaldi and Londo in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"Okay, we made a mistake. I'm sorry. Here, open my wrist."
"Centauri don't have major arteries in their wrist."
"Of course we don't. What do you think, I'm stupid?"
    Londo and Garibaldi in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"Your diligence is commendable. Anything else?"
"No, I just--"
"Then, if you'll excuse me, but I'm in the middle of 15 things, all of them annoying. Thank you for coming by."
    Ivanova to Winters in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"My father always told me: 'The best way to understand someone is to fight him, make him angry. That's when you see the real person.'"
    Sinclair to Ivanova in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"He taught me everything I know about flying, and combat. He said to ignore the propaganda, focus on what you see. I've never seen the Minbari fight dishonorably. They never pull a sneak attack."
    Sinclair to Ivanova in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"So, who are you voting for?"
"I think I'll vote for Marie Crane. .. I do not like Santiago. I always thought that a leader should have a strong chin. He has no chin and his vice-president has several. This, to me, is not a good combination."
    Sinclair and Ivanova in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"We should've wiped out your kind when we had the chance."
"What happened? Run out of small children to butcher?"
    Londo and G'Kar in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"You eat like a starving man."
"Seeing death has the way of doing that to me."
    Ivanova and Garibaldi in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"If you ask me, the universe is going to hell in a handbasket."
    Garibaldi to Ivanova in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"They are alone. They are a dying people. We should let them pass."
"Who? The Narn or the Centauri?"
"Yes."
    Kosh and Sinclair in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"Mr. Garibaldi, you are sitting in my station, using my equipment. Is there a reason for this, or to save time should I just go ahead and snap your hands off at the wrist?"
    Ivanova to Garibaldi in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"The Council, the Council can go to hell. And the emergency session can go to hell. And you, you can go to hell too. I wouldn't want you to feel left out!"
    Londo to Vir Cotto in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"Londo, Londo, why are you doing this?"
"Because, we are a race of lunatics and cowards."
    Vir and Londo in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"Well, unlike me, the Lieutenant Commander takes a while to warm up to people, especially when she's working."
    Garibaldi to Winters in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"The Earth Alliance can't go around being the galaxy's policemen."
    The Senator to Sinclair in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"Mr. Garibaldi! Just now, would you really have killed me?"
"Yes. Yes, I would've, but I'm just as glad I didn't have to. The paperwork's a pain in the butt."
    Londo and Garibaldi in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"Had the silly thing in reverse."
    Duck Dodgers in Babylon 5:"Midnight on the Firing Line"
----
"Always this busy around here?"
"Yes. We like it that way."
    Dr. Franklin and LtCmdr. Ivanova in Babylon 5:"Soul Hunter"
----
Nothing's ever really changed. What difference does it make whether it's the Corporate state or the Nation state? In our struggle for freedom we still find ourselves fighting the state.
    Jay Terpstra
----
War is one of the scourges with which it has pleased God to afflict men.
    Cardinal Richelieu
----
Do not speak harshly to any one; those who are spoken to will answer thee in the same way. Angry speech is painful: blows for blows will touch thee.
    Buddha, The Dharmapada
----
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.
    Douglas Adams
----
Love is the process of my leading you gently back to yourself. 
    Saint Exupery 
----
"Um amigo de verdade não é aquele que separa uma briga sua e sim aquele que chega dando voadora."

"a true friend is not that one that separates to one fight its and yes that one that arrives giving flying."
----
one thing with open source is, you can't criticize it, because they'll only tell you to make it better
----
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where train stops. On my desk, I have a work station...
----
Anarchy, n. Other peoples freedom.
----
Anger is a condition in which the tongue works faster than the mind.
----
Blonde is not a hair color, it is a state of mind.
----
Life was simple before World War II. After that, we had systems.
    Grace Hopper (1906-1992)
----
Nobody believed that I had a running compiler and nobody would touch it. They told me computers could only do arithmetic.
    Grace Hopper (1906-1992)
----
A ship in port is safe; but that is not what ships are built for.
    Grace Hopper (1906-1992)
----
The wonderful thing about standards is that there are so many of them to choose from.
    Grace Hopper (1906-1992), in Computer Networks, 1st. ed (1981)
----
"But Grace, then anyone will be able to write programs!"
    Said to Grace Hopper regarding COBOL
----
Don't take life too seriously: it isn't permanent.
----
I meant what I said and I said what I meant . . . An elephant's faithful One hundred percent.
    Dr. Seuss (1904 - 1991), Horton Hatches the Egg (1940)
----
Adults are just obsolete children and the hell with them.
    Dr. Seuss (Theodor Seuss Geisel) (1904 - 1991)
----
Every time you make something idiot-proof, some bastard re-invents the idiot!
----
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.
----
Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
----
Have a nice day, somewhere else.
----
I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
----
I'm having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I have forgotten this before!
----
I'm not as stupid as you look.
----
I'm on top of the world and afraid of heights.
----
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
----
I don't have an attitude problem: you have a perception problem!
----
I don't need your attitude, I have one of my own!
----
"I must do something" will always solve more problems than "Something must be done".
----
I think, therefore I am wrong.
----
If 'pro' is the opposite of 'con', what is the opposite of 'progress'?
    Mark Twain
----
If the left half of the brain controls the right hand, and the right half the left, than left-handed people are the only ones in their right minds.
----
If the sheep vote, then so must the wolves.
----
If voting changed anything it would be illegal.
----
If winners never quit, and quitters never win, what loser came up with quit while you're ahead?
----
If you can't appreciate it, You don't deserve it.
----
If you cannot win, make the one ahead of you break the record.
----
If you don't like relationships that end, why start them in the first place?
----
In most instances, all an argument proves is that two people are present.
----
In the entire history of the world, nobody ever washed a rented car.
----
It's been a long week today.
----
It's hard to answer what's wrong... when nothing is right.
----
It's mind over matter. You don't mind, it don't matter.
----
It doesn't matter whether you view the glass as half full or half empty, there's still only half a glass worth's there.
----
It is not ignorance that is the problem, but the illusion of knowledge.
----
Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
----
Never mess up an apology with an excuse.
----
Never mistake knowledge for wisdom. One helps you make a living and the other helps you make a life.
----
Nine women cannot deliver a baby in one month.
    F.P. Brooks, The Mythical Man-Month: Essays on Software Engineering
----
No one's perfect; well there was this one guy, but we killed him.
----
Nothing is right in my left brain, nothing is left in my right brain.
----
People say I shouldn't frown because it uses more muscles than smiling. Then I point out that Americans need their exercise.
----
Pessimists are just realist optimists
----
Pray for what you want. Work for what you need.
----
Real programmers don't comment their code. If it was hard to write it should be hard to understand.
----
Realists are just pessimists looking for an excuse for themselves.
----
Reality is a poor substitute for my dreams.
----
"Right" or "Wrong" is always dependent on the context.
----
"Should" and "is" are two different things.
----
Should have, would have, could have but didn't.
----
Since light travels faster than sound, people appear bright until you hear them speak.
----
Some people can carry a tune, and others just drag it behind them in the dirt.
----
Someday we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
----
Sometimes, no matter how much you do, or how much you try, someone will not understand how much you've done until you're gone and they have no one left who actually cares about them, who can look out for them, and who will understand.
----
Tell us what you need and we'll tell you how to get by without it.
----
Temptation is seen from a distance never near.
----
The best defense against logic is ignorance.
----
The glass isn't half empty. It isn't half full. It's just twice the size it should be.
----
The only thing in life achieved without effort is failure.
----
The only time you have too much fuel is when you are on fire.
----
The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds. The pessimist fears this is true.
----
There are only 10 types of people in the world; those who understand trinary, those who don't, and those who mistake it for binary.
----
There are three types of people in this world: the ones who can count, and those who can't.
----
There are three types of people in this world: the ones who keep you alive, the ones who would otherwise cause you to die, and the ones who somehow manage to do both at the same time.
----
They may not remember what you said but they will remember how you made them feel.
----
Those who think they know-it-all are very annoying to those of us who do.
----
Violence is not the answer, however it is a pretty good guess.
----
You can please all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time.
----
You ever feel like the world's a giant game of musical chairs and the music has stopped and we're the only ones without chairs?
----
You have such a pretty smile ... it's a shame the things you hide behind it.
----
"Welcome to DALNet! Where the men are men, the women are men, and the teenage girls are undercover FBI Agents!" 
    DALNet IRC Welcome Message
----
First we thought the PC was a calculator. Then we found out how to turn numbers into letters with ASCII and we thought it was a typewriter. Then we discovered graphics, and we thought it was a television. With the World Wide Web, we've realized it's a brochure 
    Douglas Adams
----
Never underestimate the bandwidth of a station wagon full of backup tapes hurling down the highway.
    Andrew Tanenbaum
----
Of course, the best way to get accurate information on Usenet is to post something wrong and wait for corrections.
    Matthew Austern
----
Come to think of it, there are already a million monkeys on a million typewriters, and Usenet is nothing like Shakespeare.
    Blair Houghton
----
Will journalling become prevalent in the Unix world at large? Probably not. After all, it's nonstandard. 
    The UNIX-HATERS Handbook (1994)
----
The most horrifying thing about Unix is that, no matter how many times you hit yourself over the head with it, you never quite manage to lose consciousness. It just goes on and on
    Patrick Sobalvarro
----
Your job is being a professor and researcher: That's one hell of a good excuse for some of the brain-damages of minix.
    Linus Torvalds to Tanenbaum (author of Minix)
----
VMS is a text-only adventure game. If you win you can use unix.
    W. Davidson
----
There are two major products that come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We don't believe this to be a coincidence
    Jeremy S. Anderson
----
Fixing Unix is easier than living with NT. 
    Jonathan Gilpin
----
Linux is only free if your time is worthless.
----
UNIX is an operating system, OS/2 is half an operating system, Windows is a shell, and DOS is a boot partition virus.
    Peter H. Coffin
----
Always program as if the person who will be maintaining your program is a violent psychopath that knows where you live
    Martin Golding
----
Do what you think is interesting, do something that you think is fun and worthwhile, because otherwise you won't do it well anyway.
    Brian Kernighan
----
.HELP SEX: This system is a computer and as such is not able to help with enquiries of this nature. For details on reproduction see the Xerox documentation.
    Help text from Essex Dec10
----
Around computers it is difficult to find the correct unit of time to measure progress. Some cathedrals took a century to complete. Can you imagine the grandeur and scope of a program that would take as long?
    Epigrams in Programming, ACM SIGPLAN Sept. 1982
----
I invented it, Bill made it famous
    David Bradley (wrote the code for Ctrl-Alt-Delete on the IBM PC)
----
Trust The Computer. The Computer is your friend.
    Paranoia RPG
----
The disadvantage of working over networks is that you can't so easily go into someone else's office and rip their bloody heart out
    Jim McDonald
----
Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window.
    Steve Wozniak
----
Part of the inhumanity of the computer is that, once it is competently programmed and working smoothly, it is completely honest.
    Isaac Asimov
----
I do not fear computers. I fear lack of them.
    Isaac Asimov
----
Software is the soul to the lifeless body of the hardware.
    Ong Lee Shyh
----
Any significant boost in technology could just as easily be a rigged demo.
----
Humans are the best value in computers - where else can you get a non-linear computer weighing only about 160lbs, having a billion binary decision elements, that can be mass-produced by unskilled labour?
----
Heuristics are bug ridden by definition - if they didn't have bugs, then they'd be algorithms.
----
You have a hardware or a software problem
    service manual for Gestetner 3240
----
NEVER EVER mess with a PCB jumper you don't understand, even if it's labelled 'SEX AND FREE BEER'.
    Dave Haynie
----
Software suppliers are trying to make their software packages more user-friendly... Their best approach, so far, has been to take all the old brochures, and stamp the words, 'user-friendly' on the cover
    Bill Gates
----
I don't understand why cheerleaders won't talk to me. Maybe I don't throw five touchdowns against Newport High, but let's see one of those football morons program in assembly language.!
    Chris Lipe
----
You know you're a geek when... You try to shoo a fly away from the monitor with your cursor. That just happened to me. It was scary.
    Juuso Heimonen
----
You can create art and beauty with a computer
    Steven Levy
----
The memory management on the PowerPC can be used to frighten small children.
    Linus Torvalds
----
When all else fails, read the instructions.
    L. Iasellio
----
Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proved it correct, not tried it.
    Donald Knuth
----
Error, keyboard not found - press F1 to continue.
    BIOS system message
----
Life would be so much easier if we only had the source code.
----
Software is like entropy. It is difficult to grasp, weighs nothing, and obeys the second law of thermodynamics; i.e. it always increases.
    Norman R. Augustine
----
Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin.
    John von Neumann (1951)
----
The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance
    Robert R. Coveyou, Oak Ridge National Laboratory
----
/* You are not expected to understand this */
    comment in the context-switching code of the V6 Unix kernel
----
Premature optimization is the root of all evil
    C. A. R. Hoare
----
Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
    Rich Cook
----
If your computer speaks English, it was probably made in Japan.
    Alan J. Perlis
----
If the code and the comments disagree, then both are probably wrong.
    Norm Schryer
----
Artificial Intelligence: the art of making computers that behave like the ones in movies.
    Bill Bulko
----
I have never seen anything fill up a vacuum so fast and still suck.
    Rob Pike (commenting on the X Window System)
----
Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
    Michael Sinz
----
Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing.
    Dick Brandon
----
If you give someone a program, you will frustrate them for a day; if you teach them how to program, you will frustrate them for a lifetime.
----
As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error
    Weisert
----
Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later
    F. Brooks, The Mythical Man-Month
----
A language that doesn't have everything is actually easier to program in than some that do
    Dennis M. Ritchie
----
Base eight is just like base ten really, if you're missing two fingers
    Tom Lehrer
----
Software Engineering is that part of Computer Science which is too difficult for the Computer Scientist.
    F. L. Bauer
----
Memory is like an orgasm. It's a lot better if you don't have to fake it.
    Seymore Cray (on virtual memory)
----
Like car accidents, most hardware problems are due to driver error.
----
Computers do not solve problems, they execute solutions
    Laurent Gasser
----
Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.
    Andy Rooney
----
Reading computer manuals without the hardware is as frustrating as reading sex manuals without the software.
    Arthur C. Clarke
----
Captain Elizabeth Lochley : What the hell is your problem?
Michael Garibaldi : For starters, I don't know you, therefore I don't trust you.
Captain Elizabeth Lochley : The world is full of people you don't know.
Michael Garibaldi : I worry about that all the time.
    Babylon 5
----
Captain John Sheridan : Are you trying to cheer me up?
Susan Ivanova : No sir, wouldn't dream of it.
Captain John Sheridan : Good, I hate being cheered up.
Susan Ivanova : In that case we're all going to die slow, agonizing deaths.
Captain John Sheridan : Thank you, I feel so much better now. 
    Babylon 5
----
Susan Ivanova : Always finding good in every situation, Captain?
Captain John Sheridan : Absolutely. If I didn't, I might end up like you.
Susan Ivanova : Hey, what's that supposed to mean? Did anybody else hear that?
    Babylon 5
----
Ambassador Londo Mollari : When I said my quarters were cold, I did not mean, 'Oh, I think it's a little chilly in here, perhaps I'll throw a blanket on the bed.' No, I said it was COLD, as in, 'Oh, my left arm has snapped off like an icicle and shattered on the floor'! This is highly inappropriate, Captain!
Captain John Sheridan : You're right. There are several other parts of your body I'd much rather see snapped off. 
    Babylon 5
----
Dukhat : When others do a foolish thing, you should tell them it is a foolish thing. They can still continue to do it, but at least the truth is where it needs to be. 
    Babylon 5
----
Kosh Naranek : The avalanche has already started; it is too late for the pebbles to vote. 
    Babylon 5
----
Susan Ivanova : Ivanova is always right. I will listen to Ivanova. I will not ignore Ivanova's recommendations. Ivanova is God. *And*, if this ever happens again, Ivanova will personally rip your lungs out! 
    Babylon 5
----
Captain Susan Ivanova : Good luck, captain. I think you're about to go where... everyone has gone before. 
    Babylon 5
----
Ambassador Vir Cotto : Prophecy is a guess that comes true. When it doesn't, it's a metaphor.
    Babylon 5
----
Lennier : They trained you well on Minbar.
Marcus Cole : They said I had a lot of repressed anger.
Lennier : And?
Marcus Cole : I'm not repressed anymore! 
    Babylon 5
----
Elric : As I look at you, Ambasador Mollari, I see a great hand reaching out of the stars. And I hear sounds; the sounds of billions of people calling out your name.
Ambassador Londo Mollari : My followers?
Elric : Your victims. 
    Babylon 5
----
Citizen G'Kar : Do you want to be president?
Captain John Sheridan : Yes.
Citizen G'Kar : Then put your hand on the book and say I do.
Captain John Sheridan : I do.
Citizen G'Kar : Good, let's eat.
    Babylon 5
----
Sinclair : I'm still waiting for an explanation, gentlemen.
Ambassador Londo Mollari : Yes, and I'm prepared to give you one, Commander, as soon as the room stops spinning.
Sinclair : This station creates gravity by rotation. It never stops spinning.
Ambassador Londo Mollari : Well, you begin to see my problem. 
    Babylon 5
----
Ambassador Londo Mollari : Stop eating that! You don't even know what it is.
Citizen G'Kar : Something called..."rice."
Ambassador Londo Mollari : Yes. And if it was any good, do you think they would have been standing there, throwing it at people? 
    Babylon 5
----
Major Krantz : What if we take you with us, put you on trial.
Zathras : Zathras not of this time. You take, Zathras die. You leave, Zathras die. Either way, it is bad for Zathras. 
    Babylon 5
----
Citizen G'Kar : If I take a lamp and shine it toward the wall, a bright spot will appear on the wall. The lamp is our search for truth... for understanding. Too often, we assume that the light on the wall is God, but the light is not the goal of the search, it is the result of the search. The more intense the search, the brighter the light on the wall. The brighter the light on the wall, the greater the sense of revelation upon seeing it. Similarly, someone who does not search - who does not bring a lantern - sees nothing. What we perceive as God is the by-product of our search for God. It may simply be an appreciation of the light... pure and unblemished... not understanding that it comes from us. Sometimes we stand in front of the light and assume that we are the center of the universe - God looks astonishingly like we do - or we turn to look at our shadow and assume that all is darkness. If we allow ourselves to get in the way, we defeat the purpose, which is to use the light of our search to illuminate the wall in all its beauty and in all its flaws; and in so doing, better understand the world around us. 
    Babylon 5
----
Drazi Ambassador : Captain Sheridan! We thought you were dead!
Captain John Sheridan : I was. I'm better now. 
    Babylon 5
----
Marcus Cole : [after beating someone for information] Its like I always say, you get more with a kind word and a two-by-four than with just a kind word. 
    Babylon 5
----
Susan Ivanova : Ambassador, do you really want to know what's going on down there?
Ambassador Londo Mollari : Yes, absolutely!
Susan Ivanova : Boom. Boom boom boom. Boom boom. Boom! Have a nice day! 
    Babylon 5
----
Citizen G'Kar : With luck, they may never find you, but if they do, you will know pain...
Na'Toth #2 : And you will know fear.
Citizen G'Kar : And then you will die. Have a pleasant flight. 
    Babylon 5
----
Lt. Kemmer: I demand you open a channel to Earth at once.
Susan Ivanova : I'm a Lieutenant Commander on Earth Force, Major. I don't take demands. If you will request, I will consider it.
Lt. Kemmer: Very well, then. I request that you open a channel to Earthdome.
Susan Ivanova : Request denied. Have a nice day. 
    Babylon 5
----
Sinclair : Ready?
Delenn : Why is it that your people always ask someone if they are ready right before you are about to do something massively unwise?
Sinclair : Tradition. 
    Babylon 5
----
Captain John Sheridan : Delenn, I have been working up a good mad all day and I am NOT about to let you ruin it by agreeing with me! 
    Babylon 5
----
Lt. Commander Susan Ivanova : I'll *gain* weight!
Dr. Stephen Franklin : At first, yes.
Lt. Commander Susan Ivanova : Fine! All my life I've fought against imperialism; now *I'm* the expanding Russian frontier!
Dr. Stephen Franklin : Yes, but with very nice borders. 
    Babylon 5
----
I have decided that suicide is completely out of the question. I refuse to end the suffering of others... No, I must contemplate homicide and end the suffering of one... ME!!!
----
An ambassador is an honest man sent abroad to lie for his country.
    Sir Henry Wotton
----
The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.
    Alvin Toffler
----
The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.
    Joseph Heller from Catch 22
----
"People want more.  Thought is overrated.  Look back at history, my dear Socrates, and you will see that all the powerful ideas that have moved men most were simpleminded and superficial, never deep."
    Joseph Heller from Catch 22
----
Man is by nature a political animal.
    Aristotle ,  Politics
----
The people who oppose your ideas the most are those who represent the establishment that your ideas will upset.
    Anthony J. D'Angelo ,  The College Blue Book
----
Never doubt that a small group of committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.
    Margaret Mead
----
There are those who look at things the way they are, and ask why... I dream of things that never were, and ask why not?
    Robert F. Kennedy
----
All thought is naught but a footnote to Plato.
    George Santiano
----
The gods too are fond of a joke.
    Aristotle
----
The greatest discovery of any generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitude.
    William James
----
To find something you can enjoy is far better than finding something you can possess.
    Glenn Holm
----
Do all the good you can, By all the means you can, In all the ways you can, In all the places you can, At all the times you can, To all the people you can, As long as ever you can.
    John Wesley
----
To attempt an understanding of Muad'Dib without understanding his mortal enemies, the Harkonnens, is to attempt seeing Truth without knowing Falsehood. It is the attempt to see the Light without knowing Darkness. It cannot be.
    from "Manual of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
A beginning is the time for taking the most delicate care that the balances are correct. This every sister of the Bene Gesserit knows. To begin your study of the life of Muad'Dib, then, take care that you first place him in his time: born in the 57th year of the Padishah Emperor, Shaddam IV. And take the most special care that you locate Muad'Dib in his place: the planet Arrakis. Do not be deceived by the fact that he was born on Caladan and lived his first fifteen years there. Arrakis, the planet known as Dune, is forever his place.
    from "Manual of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
There should be a science of discontent. People need hard times and oppression to develop psychic muscles.
    from "Collected Sayings of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
'Mood? What has mood to do with it? You fight when the necessity arises — no matter the mood! Mood's a thing for cattle or making love or playing the baliset. It's not for fighting.' 
    counsel of Gurney Halleck to young Paul.
----
"Any road followed precisely to its end leads precisely nowhere. Climb the mountain just a little bit to test that it's a mountain. From the top of the mountain, you cannot see the mountain."
    from "Muad'Dib: Family Commentaries" by the Princess Irulan
----
My father once told me that respect for the truth comes close to being the basis for all morality. "Something cannot emerge from nothing," he said. This is profound thinking if you understand how unstable "the truth" can be.
    from "Conversations with Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
<_molly_> i only shower when i A: smell, or B: fall into the mudd
<melf> Does B happen a lot ?
    Seen on Bash.org - #46712
----
( l008com) Hey does anyone know how David Blaine levitates?
( LoganCale) There are two ways.
( LoganCale) One way he's on a cable and they digitally edit it out.
( l008com) no he's on ABC thats not cable
    Seen on Bash.org - #311282
----
<|P0SiX|> you version'd me because?
<Valin> Because I wanted to see if you are one of those damn Microsoft OS users. You are, and you shouldn't have any nick that has anything to do with the better OSes (the free, unix-like OSes) because anything affiliated with those OSes are too good for the likes of you to soil
<|P0SiX|> [Valin VERSION reply]: mIRC32 v5.41
    Seen on Bash.org - #798
----
<DigiGnome> Real life should have a fucking search function, or something.
<DigiGnome> I need my socks.
    Seen on Bash.org - #1660
----
<+kritical> christin: you need to learn how to figure out stuff yourself..
<+Christin1> how do i do that
    Seen on Bash.org - #3936
----
Panny: I could sell my soul back to my ex for a computer.
RebelPrincess: don't.
Panny: I could sell my soul to Microsoft for a computer.
RebelPrincess: don't!!!!
    Seen on Bash.org - #9262
----
<Pi> Violence solves everything.
<Pi> If you have a problem that violence doesn't solve, then you're not using enough of it.
    Seen on Bash.org - #43724
----
<wecell> new apples look fairly interesting, but i'd hate to buy into something that is going to CRASH all the time.
<DigDug> wecell : What are you using right now?
<wecell> i've always used windows machines.
    Seen on Bash.org - #16
----
@(DonoftheDead) They say if you play a Microsoft CD backwards you hear satanic messages. That's nothing, because if you play it forwards it installs Windows.
    Seen on Bash.org - #83891
----
<Soybomb> On the way home yesterday, I saw a car with a vanity plate that read: LINUX OS
<Soybomb> I really wished for a truck with a WINDOWS plate to ram it...sadly, no.
<Druuna> unfortunately, you'd probably crash before hitting it...
    Seen on Bash.org - #148121
----
<cheapo> haha, this screen appeared on my windows that said "time before shutdown: 60 seconds"
<cheapo> so i turned the windows clock 2 years backwards and now it says "time before shutdown: 729 days" :D:D
<cheapo> i just love windows :D
    Seen on Bash.org - #227455
----
* Reddog is now known as You
* You have performed an Illegal operation, please Restart Windows
* You is now known as Reddog
* Desh has quit IRC (Quit: brb gotta restart windows...stupid trillian yelling at me)
    Seen on Bash.org - #238969
----
<RaZ> I should burn my windows ME CD
<Thrawn> no piracy
<RaZ> I mean BURN it
    Seen on Bash.org - #31899
----
<Neon[UK]>im considering using redhat as my desktop pc
<Neon[UK]>its just so much better
<Neon[UK]>windows error: OMFG THERZZ AN ERRROR!!111 WTF??!?!?!
<Neon[UK]>linux error: hello there, you have an error. here's a detailed list of whats gone wrong and he's how to fix it, would you like some coffee?
    Seen on Bash.org - #65749
----
<Psinic> windows 98 is like that drunk uncle that thinks he knows everything and always tries to convince you he was a CIA operative, and when you argue, he gets violent and then passes out.
    Seen on Bash.org - #14776
----
<Frag_> whats a good bench mark program?
<Ghaleon> Frag_: deltree /y c:\windows
<Ghaleon> the longer it takes, the slower your computer is
<Ghaleon> (ps, just a joke)
<Frag_> uh can i undo deltree?
    Seen on Bash.org - #2884
----
<Ramza> well how come it's down for me?
<Ramza> and don't say because of windows
<Cyan683> Does it give an error, or does it say "Unknown Host"?
<Ramza> yes
<Cyan683> .....
<Cyan683> YES IS NOT AN ANSWER TO "A OR B?"
* Cyan683 sets mode: +i
* Ramza was kicked by Cyan683 (Wham!    --  Kibou to Hikari no script)
* Cyan683 sets mode: -i
* Ramza (spoon@anandtech.com) has joined #starmen
<Ramza> no?
    Seen on Bash.org - #36672
----
krlgol2: Microsoft has also managed to upset women and entire countries. A Spanish-language version of Windows XP, destined for Latin American markets, asked users to select their gender between "not specified," "male" or "bitch," because of an unfortunate error in translation.
    Seen on Bash.org - #395262
----
"Windows - when reboot is the only option"
----
DO you who know what we suffer here, do not forget us in your prayers.
    from Manual of Muad'Dib by the Princess Irulan
----
Deep in the human unconscious is a pervasive need for a logical universe that makes sense. But the real universe is always one step beyond logic.
    from "The Sayings of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
"Don't make me laugh Starfleet ... and don't make me pull rank on you either." 
    B'Elanna to Harry, from Star Trek Voyager - 
----
"Commander Chakotay was just showing me how to contact my animal guide." Janeway to Torres
"I hope you had more success with your animal guide than I had with mine." Torres to Janeway
"B'Elanna is the only person I know who tried to kill her animal guide"  Chakotay
    From Star Trek Voyager
----
B'Elanna: "Harry."
Harry: "B'Elanna, shouldn't you be in engineering?  What are you doing here?"
B'Elanna: "Just answer one question, Starfleet.  Where is here?"
Harry: "What?"
B'Elanna: "Where am I?"
    From Star Trek Voyager
----
"At ease, Ensign, before you sprain something"
    Janeway, From Star Trek Voyager
----
<watashi-x> Oh my God! Are you attemping to DoS me?
<Polymer> WTF are you talking about dumb ass
<Polymer> I can't get into your MS-DOS
    Seen at Bash.org - #14
----
<wecell> new apples look fairly interesting, but i'd hate to buy into something that is going to CRASH all the time.
<DigDug> wecell : What are you using right now?
<wecell> i've always used windows machines.
    Seen at Bash.org - #16
----
<pezmasta> my band is gonna be called: rage against the answering machine
    Seen at Bash.org - #30
----
[17:05] *** D1 sets mode: +o C-Rock
<D1> oh wait, I was trying to kick you.
    Seen at Bash.org - #33
----
Most of our so-called reasoning consists in finding arguments for going on believing as we already do.
    James Harvey Robinson
----
In all things there are three choices: Yes, No & no choice, except in this -- I either choose the truth or I am deceit.
    Sovereign
----
Difficulties are meant to rouse, not discourage. The human spirit is to grow strong by conflict.
    William Ellery Channing
----
All we have of freedom -- all we use or know -- This our fathers bought for us, long and long ago.
    Rudyard Kipling
----
There is nothing so absurd but some philosopher has said it.
    Cicero
----
Do not follow where the path may lead. Go, instead, where there is no path and leave a trail.
----
He helps others most, who shows them how to help themselves.
    A. P. Gouthey
----
While you're saving your face, you're losing your ass.
    President Lyndon Johnson
----
Let him who would enjoy a good future waste none of his present.
    Roger Babson
----
Speak the truth, but leave immediately after.
    Slovenian Proverb
----
Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason.
----
A computer is almost human - except that it does not blame its mistakes on another computer.
----
For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.
    Bob Wells
----
Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without.
    Confucius ,  Analects
----
If you would not be forgotten as soon as you are dead, either write things worth reading about or do things worth writing about.
    Ben Franklin
----
Never look down to test the ground before taking your next step; only he who keeps his eye fixed on the far horizon will find the right road.
    Dag Hammarskjold
----
Everyone is kneaded out of the same dough but not baked in the same oven.
    Yiddish proverb
----
When you have faults, do not fear to abandon them.
    Confucius, The Confucian Analects
----
A good plan executed today is better than a perfect plan executed at some indefinite point in the future.
    George S. Patton ,  General
----
"What's important is not that we can conceive the idea, but that when we actually test it on people you discover it doesn't work... your intuition is wrong."
    Daniel M. Russell (IBM Almaden / Xerox PARC)
----
Torres: "It may be the warriors who get the glory but it's the engineers who build societies, don't forget that." 
    From Star Trek Voyager 7x10 - Flash And Blood #2
----
Dying for Amber is easy...but living for something... that's something much more difficult.
    Bleys from One year leater - The chronicles of Amber, Roger Zelazny
----
Everything seemed hopeless... and then, it got worse.
    Benedict from One year leater - The chronicles of Amber, Roger Zelazny
----
I'm working on it from time to time. I might even finish it by the end of the year (I just don't know which year:) 
    Alex Michailov - seen on his site http://www.stwing.upenn.edu/~avm/Amber.shtml
----
To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them.

    Hamlet (III.i.64-68) 
----
There's something to be said for relatives......it has to be said because it's unprintable!
    Albert Einstein
----
He who exercises government by means of his virtue may be compared to the north polar star, which keeps its place and all the stars turn towards it.
    Confucius ,  The Confucian Analects
----
When people have no other tyrant, their own public opinion becomes one.
    Edward BulwerLytton
----
There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action.
    Goethe
----
I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.
    Confucius
----
He who laughs last is generally the last to get the joke.
    Terry Cohen
----
It is the soldier, not the reporter, who has given us freedom of the press.
It is the soldier, not the poet, who has given us freedom of speech.
It is the soldier, not the campus organizer, who has given us the freedom to demonstrate.
It is the soldier, who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protestor to burn the flag.
    Father Denis Edward O'Brien, USMC
----
<SenorWeird> ugh. I need help
<Duckie5147> with what?
<SenorWeird> I got to the end of a page in this novel i'm reading and I hit the "page down" button on my keyboard.
<Duckie5147> hahaha
<Duckie5147> you need to read things not one the screen
<SenorWeird>  and when the page didn't turn, I got pissed and grabbed the mouse and was like where's the damn scroll bar"
<SenorWeird>  and then I realized...."you're reading a book. let the mouse go."
    Seen at Bash.org - #34066
----
<@Exor[B-AFK]> yeah apparently a teacher in britain was arrested. on him they found a pencil, eraser, ruler, protractor and compass. They said he was part of the Al Gebra network, and that he had weapons of math instruction!
<@Exor[B-AFK]> HA HA.
* Exor[B-AFK] shoots self
    Seen at Bash.org - #98701
----
(Skyler) Alright
(Skyler) Everyone ready?
*** rarrzeroEXE (Hat@1Cust73.tnt3.seymour.in.da.uu.net) Quit (cosmos.esper.net chocobo.esper.net)
*** IAN6990 (XX2IAN2XX@AC98EF09.ipt.aol.com) Quit (cosmos.esper.net chocobo.esper.net)
*** Silence (Silence@AC8274C2.ipt.aol.com) Quit (cosmos.esper.net chocobo.esper.net)
*** Valefor (Valefor@pppta13-471.ght.iadfw.net) Quit (cosmos.esper.net chocobo.esper.net)
*** Flashfire (flashfire.@80.192.168.143) Quit (cosmos.esper.net chocobo.esper.net)
*** aminal (rah@12-238-242-19.client.attbi.com) Quit (cosmos.esper.net chocobo.esper.net)
*** Lani (Lani930@12-248-25-241.client.attbi.com) Quit (cosmos.esper.net chocobo.esper.net)
(Comic-San) ....
    Seen at Bash.org - #23272
----
his_madjesty: hey, I wake up in the middle of the night for all sorts of reasons.
his_madjesty: mostly to get up off the computer chair and go to bed.
    Seend at Bash.org - #448646
----
Calvin: "Any monsters under my bed tonight ?!"
Monster: "NOPE!" "NO!" "UHUH"
Calvin: "Well there'd better NOT be! I'd hate to have to torch one with my flame thrower!"
Hobbes: "You have a flame thrower ??"
Calvin: "They lie I lie"
    From Calvin and Hobbes
----
The man who comes with a tale about others has himself an ax to grind.
    Chinese proverb
----
The great thing about democracy is that it gives every voter a chance to do something stupid.
    Art Spander
----
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
    Carl Zwanzig
----
<DigDug> looks like microsoft is extending http
<DigDug> HTTP 403.9 - Access Forbidden: Too many users are connected
<DigDug> Internet Information Services
<OxOO> that must be visual http++
    Seen at Bash.org - 764
----
<GaRlic> how you like my new name?
<drunkers> it stinks
    Seen at Bash.org - 15614
----
<SomeGuyYouDontKnow> theres a fatal error between the keyboard and the back of the chair
<Yomanman> Norton Crashguard had to shut downthe chair. all unsaved comfort settings have been lost
<SomeGuyYouDontKnow> hit any user to continue
    Seen at Bash.org - 30248
----
* peer stares at CCOutlaw[fagitz]
*** Quits: CCOutlaw[fagitz] (outlawtorn@FFChat-24919.ipt.aol.com) (Connection reset by peer)
<peer> :D
    Seen at Bash.org - 36905
----
<IsamuDyson> i think they need to get out and meet some people
<BloodFromStone> Hey, I won't allow that kind of talk in here.
    Seen at Bash.org - 53321
----
Just because something doesn't do what you planned it to do doesn't mean it's useless.
    Thomas A. Edison
----
If you obey all of the rules, you miss all of the fun.
    Katherine Hepburn
----
If confusion is the first step to knowledge, I must be a genius.
    Larry Leissner
----
I am not one who was born in the possession of knowledge; I am one who is fond of antiquity, and earnest in seeking it there.
    Confucius ,  The Confucian Analects
----
Doubt is not a pleasant condition but certainty is an absurd one.
    Voltaire
----
"Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far"
    Theodore Roosevelt
----
Any man who afflicts the human race with ideas must be prepared to see them misunderstood.
    H. L. Mencken
----
The question is not, can they reason? Nor, can they talk? But, can they suffer?
    Jeremy Bentham
----
Never cut what you can untie.
    Joseph Joubert
----
I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education.
    Wilson Mizner
----
More appealing than knowledge itself is the feeling of knowledge.
    Daniel J. Boorstin
----
A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he gets to know something.
    Wilson Mizner
----
A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions.
    Wilson Mizner
----
Always be nice to people on the way up; because you'll meet the same people on the way down.
    Wilson Mizner
----
If you steal from one author, it's plagiarism; if you steal from many, it's research.
    Wilson Mizner
----
Over in Hollywood they almost made a great picture, but they caught it in time.
    Wilson Mizner
----
Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark; professionals built the Titanic
----
just eat all the people on your way up, cause they will eat your heart out on your way down
    Quaqua
----
The truth is usually just an excuse for a lack of imagination
    Elim Garak
----
Treason, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder
    Elim Garak
----
I cannot forecast to you the action of Russia. It is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma
    Winston Churchill
----
If you think of yourselves as helpless and ineffectual, it is certain that you will create a despotic government to be your master. The wise despot, therefore, maintains among his subjects a popular sense that they are helpless and ineffectual.
    Frank Herbert ,  The Dosadi Experiment
----
"Why do you test for humans?" he asked.
"To set you free."
"Free?"
"Once men turned their thinking over to machines in hope that this would set them free. But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them."
"Thou shalt not make a machine in the likeness of a man's mind," Paul quoted.
"Right out of the Butlerian Jihad and the Orange Catholic Bible," she said.
    From Dune
----
Don't let people drive you crazy when you know it's in walking distance.
----
Nothing is more difficult, and therefore more precious, than to be able to decide.
    Napoleon I
----
If we are to go forward, we must go back and rediscover those precious values -- that all reality hinges on moral foundations and that all reality has spiritual control.
    Martin Luther King, Jr.
----
**  WARNING: USE OF THIS ALPHA RELEASE MAY INFEST YOUR HOUSE WITH  **
**  TERMITES, ROT YOUR TEETH,  GROW HAIR ON YOUR PALMS, AND PASTE  **
**  INNUENDO  INTO  YOUR  C.V.  RIGHT  BEFORE  A  JOB  INTERVIEW!  **
**  DON'T SAY WE DIDN'T WARN YOU, MAN. WE TOTALLY DID RIGHT HERE.  **
    Seen at media-wiki released notes
----
"No. We have to stay here and there's a simple reason why. Ask ten different scientists about the environment, population control, genetics and you'll get ten different answers, but there's one thing every scientist on the planet agrees on. Whether it happens in a hundred years or a thousand years or a million years, eventually our Sun will grow cold and go out. When that happens, it won't just take us. It'll take Marilyn Monroe and Lao-Tzu, Einstein, Morobuto, Buddy Holly, Aristophanes .. and all of this .. all of this was for nothing unless we go to the stars." 
    Commander Sinclair, Babylon 5 "Infection"
----
Civilization exists by geological consent, subject to change without notice.
    Will Durant
----
It is wise to direct your anger towards problems -- not people; to focus your energies on answers -- not excuses.
    William Arthur Ward
----
"I/O, I/O, It's off to disk I go, to read or write a bit or byte. I/O, I/O, I/O"
----
"There are only 10 types of people in this world. Those who know ternary, those who don't and those who confuse it with binary."
----
"Before software can be reusable it first has to be usable."
    Ralph Johnson
----
Software is like entropy. It is difficult to grasp, weighs nothing, and obeys the second law of thermodynamics; i.e., it always increases.
    Norman R. Augustine
----
"You start coding. I'll go find out what they want."
    Computer analyst to programmer
----
The hardest thing is to go to sleep at night, when there are so many urgent things needing to be done. A huge gap exists between what we know is possible with today's machines and what we have so far been able to finish.
    Donald Knuth
----
"... the psychological profiling [of a programmer] is mostly the ability to shift levels of abstraction, from low level to high level. To see something in the small and to see something in the large."
    An interview with Donald Knuth (http://home.hccnet.nl/h.vink/lead.htm). Dr. Dobb's Journal, pages 16-22, April 1996
----
Science is what we understand well enough to explain to a computer. Art is everything else we do.
    Donald Knuth - Foreword to the book A=B
----
Any inaccuracies in this index may be explained by the fact that it has been sorted with the help of a computer.
    Donald Knuth - "Sorting and Searching"
----
Premature optimization is the root of all evil (or at least most of it) in programming.
    Donald Knuth - "Computer Programming as an Art" 1974 Turing Award lecture
----
"The most important thing in the programming language is the name. A language will not succeed without a good name. I have recently invented a very good name and now I am looking for a suitable language."
    Donald Knuth
----
"... in fact what I would like to see is thousands of computer scientists let loose to do whatever they want. That's what really advances the field."
    Donald Knuth
----
A list is only as strong as its weakest link.
    Donald Knuth
----
"An algorithm must be seen to be believed."
    Donald Knuth
----
Fiona: "You didn't slay the dragon?"
Shrek: "It's on my to-do list."
    From Shrek
----
Donkey: "Are we there yet?"
Shrek: "Yes."
Donkey: "Really?"
Shrek: "NOOOO!"
    From Shrek 2
----
Puss in Boots: "STOP Ogre! I have misjudged you."
Shrek: "Join the club, we have jackets."
    From Shrek 2
----
A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals, and you know it.
1500 years ago, everyone knew that the Earth was the center of the universe. 500 years ago, everyone knew that the Earth was flat. 15 minutes ago, you knew that humans were alone on this planet. Imagine what you'll "know" tomorrow.
    Agent K - Man In Black
----
Gentlemen, congratulations. You're everything we've come to expect from years of government training.
    Agent Z - Man In Black
----
"War is good for business." 34th Rule of Acquisition
"Peace is good for business." 35th Rule of Acquisition
    Faringi rules of Acquisition - Star Trek
----
The purpose of war is to support your government's decisions by force. 
    Robert Heinlein, Starship Troopers
----
The people I distrust most are those who want to improve our lives but have only one course of action.
    Frank Herbert
----
The important thing is not to stop questioning.
    Albert Einstein
----
Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
    John Lehman
----
It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy.
    Groucho Marx
----
I don't have a C compiler on my system.  How can I compile perl?

Since you don't have a C compiler, you're doomed and your vendor should be sacrificed to the Sun gods.  But that doesn't help you.
    Seen at perldoc
----
A poor workman blames his tools.
----
You can't grease a "pig" so many times that he can't be greased one more time.
----
You lose some... and you win some... and some you don't even bother to play
----
You need to bait the hook to catch the fish.
----
You'll always miss 100% of the [basketball] shots you don't take.
----
You have to crawl before you can walk.
----
You can't milk a cow with your hands in your pants.
----
You can't make an omelette without breaking eggs.
----
You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink
----
You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.
----
Worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere
----
Wide ears and short tongue are the best.
----
Why pay for the cow when the milk is free?"
----
Who keeps company with the wolves, will learn to howl.
----
While the cat is away, the mice will play.
----
When in Rome do as the Romans do.
----
Fortunes exist among leftovers.
----
It's easier to make it than thinking about it.
----
Any training school for free citizens must begin by teaching distrust, not trust. It must teach questioning, not acceptance of stock answers.
    From Dune: House Corrino, Cammar Pilru
----
Facts mean nothing when they are preempted by appearence. Do not underestimate the power of impression over reality.
    From Dune: House Harkonnen, Crown Prince Raphael Corrino
----
Discovery is dangerous but so is life. A man unwilling to take risk is doomed never to learn, never to grow, never to live.
    From Dune: House Harkonnen, Planetologist Pardot Kynes
----
There's no secret to balance. You just have to feel the waves.
    From Darwi Odrade, Dune - Chapterhouse
----
When you think to take determination of your fate into your own hands, that is the moment you can be crushed. Be cautious. Allow for surprises. When we create, there are always other forces at work.
    From Darwi Odrade, Dune - Chapterhouse
----
Intelligence takes chance with limited data in an arena where mistakes are not only possible but also necessary.
    From Darwi Odrade, Dune - Chapterhouse
----
Seek freedom and become captive of your desires. Seek discipline and find your liberty.
    From The Coda, Dune - Chapterhouse
----
We witness a passing phase of eternity. Important things happen but some people never notice. Accidents intervene. You are not present at episodes. You depend on reports. And people shutter their minds. What good are reports? History in a news account? Preselected at an editorial conference, digested and excreted by prejudice? Accounts you need seldom come from those who make history. Diaries, memoirs and autobiographies are subjective forms of special pleading. Archives are crammed with such suspect stuff.
    From Darwi Odrade, Dune - Chapterhouse
----
Enter no conflict against fanatics unless you can defuse them. Oppose a religion with another religion only if your proofs (miracles) are irrefutable or if you can mesh in a way that the fanatics accept you as god-inspired.
    From Missionaria Protectiva, Primary Teaching, Dune - Chapterhouse
----
No sweeteners will cloak some forms of bitterness. If it tastes bitter, spit it out. That's what our earliest ancestors did.
    From The Coda, Dune - Chapterhouse
----
"In a world full surrounded by Windows, we're handing out rocks" 
    BeOS Radio
----
"Rip. Mix. Burn" 
    Apple Computer
----
You can't appreciate Shakespeare until you've read him in the original Klingon
    General Chang (Star Trek VI)
----
Please Captain, not in front of the Klingons.
    Spock, to Kirk (Star Trek V)
----
Humour. It is a difficult concept
    Saavik (Star Trek II)
----
I was out saving the galaxy when your grandfather was in diapers
    Kirk - Generations
----
You say history considers me dead. Who am I to argue with history?
    Kirk - Generations
----
Geordi: "Data... I made that joke seven years ago"
Data: "I know.... I just got it!"
    From Generations
----
Normal is what everyone else is and you are not.
    Dr. Soran, to Geordi
----
Rumours of my assimilation have been greatly exagerrated
    Picard - First Contact
----
Do I annoy you?
    Dr. Bashir, Deep Space Nine, The Storyteller
----
The Borg wouldn't know fun if they assimilated an amusement park.
    B'Elanna Torres, Voyager
----
Truth is an excuse for the lack of imagination.
    Garak, Deep Space Nine
----
Sometimes it's possible to make no mistakes and still lose. It is not a weakness. It is life.
    Jean-Luc Picard, Next Generation, Peak Performance
----
I can't disappear any more than you could win a beauty contest.
    Q to Worf, Next Generation, ("Deja Q")
----
The one place where money come before work is in the dictionary
----
Mal: "We're not gonna die. We can't die, Bendis. You know why? Because we are so...very...pretty. We are just too pretty for God to let us die."
    serenity, parts 1 & 2, From Firefly
----
Mal: "I don't believe there's a power in the 'verse that can stop Kaylee from being cheerful." (he smiles at her, never stopping working) "Sometimes you just wanna duct tape her mouth and dump her in the hold for a month."
    serenity, parts 1 & 2, From Firefly
----
Mal: "If anyone gets nosy, just...you know... shoot 'em. "
Zoe: "Shoot 'em?"
Mal: "Politely."
    serenity, parts 1 & 2, From Firefly
----
Book: "I brought you some supper but if you'd prefer a lecture, I've a few very catchy ones prepped...sin and hellfire... one has lepers."
    serenity, parts 1 & 2, From Firefly
----
Jayne: "Testing, testing. Captain, can you hear me?"
Mal: "I'm standing right here."
Jayne: "You're coming through good and loud."
Mal: " 'Cause I'm standing right here."
    serenity, parts 1 & 2, From Firefly
----
Mal: "Well, you were right about this being a bad idea."
Zoe: "Thanks for sayin', sir."
    serenity, parts 1 & 2, From Firefly
----
<billyblacktop> yo yo yo, sup my niggas?
<jimmy2toes>  your not black
<billyblacktop>  how do you know that?
<jimmy2toes>  I hacked your webcam, and now I can see you
<billyblacktop>  yeah right you cant do that
<jimmy2toes> I can and I did.
<billyblacktop>  ok then what color hair do I have
<jimmy2toes> Hmmm, let me zoom in a bit. Blonde, and you are white, about 6' 2", your room has an emenim poster and your bedspread is yellow and blue.
<billyblacktop>  holy fuck man im telling the cops
Quits: {billyblacktop} (billyb@235.253.473.232) (Quit:)
<jimmy2toes>  LMAO, that was a friend of mine, I just set up his comp today, and showed him mirc, he doesnt know my nick, what a fat tool!!!
<nellcarterlookalike>  A fat tool indeed.
    Seen at Bash.org - #16564
----
<Amnesiac> there's something like awk in perl?
    Seen at Bash.org - #75470
----
Some ideas are so stupid that only intellectuals could believe them.
    George Orwell
----
If I had eight hours to chop down a tree, I'd spend six sharpening my ax.
    Abraham Lincoln
----
There is nothing wrong with the software that rm won't cure.
    Arnie Romo
----
Think big.  Pollute the Mississippi.
----
There is no substitute for good manners, except, perhaps, fast reflexes.
----
The problem with any unwritten law is that you don't know where to go to erase it.
    Glaser and Way
----
The Jewel of Judgement, Dworkin's text editor.
And people complain about having to learn vi!
----
The Jewel of Judgement, Dworkin's text editor.
And you thought Emacs had a lot of options.
----
The Jewel of Judgement, Dworkin's operating system.
And people complain about Unix having weird command names!
----
/earth is 98% full ... please delete anyone you can.
----
Windows Error 004 -- Operator Fell Asleep While Waiting
----
We are Microsoft...
OS/2 is irrelevant.
UNIX is irrelevant.
Openness is futile.
Prepare to be assimilated.
----
Your lucky number is 3552664958674928.  Watch for it everywhere.
----
Drive defensively.  Buy a tank.
----
"We are all individuals.  We are all individuals.  We are all individuals..."
----
Monday, n.:
        In Christian countries, the day after the baseball game.
        -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
----
Good news is just life's way of keeping you off balance.
----
"To YOU I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition."
    Woody Allen
----
CChheecckk yyoouurr dduupplleexx sswwiittcchh..
----
A cult is a religion with no political power.
    Tom Wolfe
----
C Code.  C Code run.  Run, Code, RUN!
----
Paranoia is what the lazy call wisdom.
----
Remember -- we're only simulating logic.
----
The only acting you ever see at the Oscars is when people act like they're not mad they lost. Nicole Kidman was smiling so wide, she should have won an Emmy at the Oscars for her great performance. I was like, 'If you'd done that in the movie, you'd have won an Oscar, girl!
    Chris Rock 
----
You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon'.
    Chris Rock
----
A man commented to his lunch companion: "My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire." "You're lucky," sighed the companion. "My wife dreams that in the daytime."
    Sam Ewing
----
The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
    Albert Einstein
----
If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts.
    Albert Einstein
----
Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.
    Albert Einstein
----
The politicians don't just want your money. They want your soul. They want you to be worn down by taxes until you are dependent and helpless. When you subsidize poverty and failure, you get more of both.
    James Dale Davidson
----
For every problem there is a solution which is simple, clean and wrong.
    Henry Louis Mencken
----
The average man doesn't want to be free. He wants to be safe.
    Henry Louis Mencken
----
I believe in only one thing: liberty; but I do not believe in liberty enough to want to force it upon anyone.
    Henry Louis Mencken
----
The trouble with Communism is the Communists, just as the trouble with Christianity is the Christians
    Henry Louis Mencken
----
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.
    Henry Louis Mencken
----
The objection to Puritans is not that they try to make us think as they do, but that they try to make us do as they think
    Henry Louis Mencken
----
Conscience is the inner voice that warns us somebody may be looking.
    Henry Louis Mencken
----
I believe that religion, generally speaking, has been a curse to mankind - that its modest and greatly overestimated services on the ethical side have been more than overcome by the damage it has done to clear and honest thinking
    Henry Louis Mencken 
----
The only really happy folk are married women and single men.
    Henry Louis Mencken
----
The plain truth is that I am not a fair man, and don't want to hear both sides
    Henry Louis Mencken
----
It is hard to believe that a man is telling the truth when you know that you would lie if you were in his place.
    Henry Louis Mencken
----
History deals mainly with captains and kings, gods and prophets, exploiters and despoilers, not with useful men
    Henry Louis Mencken
----
Very few of us are what we seem.
    Agatha Christie
----
Good advice is always certain to be ignored, but that's no reason not to give it
    Agatha Christie
----
But surely for everything you love you have to pay some price
    Agatha Christie
----
Never do anything yourself that others can do for you.
    Agatha Christie
----
Curious things, habits. People themselves never knew they had them.
    Agatha Christie 
----
Where large sums of money are concerned, it is advisable to trust nobody.
    Agatha Christie
----
It is completely unimportant. That is why it is so interesting!
    Agatha Christie
----
Too much mercy... often resulted in further crimes which were fatal to innocent victims who need not have been victims if justice had been put first and mercy second.
    Agatha Christie
----
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
    Douglas Adams
----
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.
    Douglas Adams
----
It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.
    Douglas Adams
----
The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.
    Douglas Adams
----
Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.
    Douglas Adams
----
You live and learn. At any rate, you live.
    Douglas Adams
----
Value your words. Each one may be the last.
    Stanislaw J. Lec
----
In a war of ideas it is people who get killed.
    Stanislaw J. Lec
----
The first condition of immortality is death.
    Stanislaw J. Lec
----
Advice to writers: Sometimes you just have to stop writing. Even before you begin.
    Stanislaw J. Lec
----
The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool.
    Jane Wagner
----
random girl: hey!
me: ...hi?
me: who is this?
random girl: Jessica, I saw u on myspace
random girl: ur hot
me: thanks
random girl: np
me: this girl keeps bugging me, but I don't want to talk to her
me: what should I do?
random girl: make up sum excuse, like ur mom is kickin u off or sumthing
me: oh alright
me: I have to go
me: my mom is kicking me off
me: bye
    Seen at Bash.org, #520670
----
The beginning of knowledge is the discovery of something we do not understand
    Frank Herbert
----
I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.
    Frank Herbert, Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear, "Dune"
----
A process cannot be understood by stopping it. Understanding must move with the flow of the process, must join it and flow with it.
    Frank Herbert, Dune (First Law of Mentat)
----
They're trained to believe, not to know. Belief can be manipulated. Only knowledge is dangerous.
    Dune Messiah
----
"What do you despise? By this are you truly known."
    Frank Herbert (1920-1986) from Dune, Manual of Muad Dib by Princess Irulan 
----
"People need hard times and oppression to develop psychic muscles."
    Frank Herbert (1920-1986), from Dune 
----
Thus spoke St. Alia-of-the-Knife: "The Reverend Mother must combine the seductive wiles of a courtesan with the untouchable majesty of a virgin goddess, holding these attributes in tension so long as the powers of her youth endure. For when youth and beauty have gone, she will find that the place-between, once occupied by tension, has become a wellspring of cunning and resourcefulness."
    from "Muad'Dib, Family Commentaries" by the Princess Irulan
----
You have read that Muad'Dib had no playmates his own age on Caladan. The dangers were too great. But Muad'Dib did have wonderful companion-teachers. There was Gurney Halleck, the troubadour-warrior. You will sing some of Gurney's songs as you read along in this book. There was Thufir Hawat, the old Mentat Master of Assassins, who struck fear even into the heart of the Padishah Emperor. There were Duncan Idaho, the Swordmaster of the Ginaz; Dr. Wellington Yueh, a name black in treachery but bright in knowledge; the Lady Jessica, who guided her son in the Bene Gesserit Way, and--of course--the Duke Leto, whose qualities as a father have long been overlooked.
    from "A Child's History of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
How do we approach the study of Muad'Dib's father? A man of surpassing warmth and surprising coldness was the Duke Leto Atreides. Yet, many facts open the way to this Duke: his abiding love for his Bene Gesserit lady; the dreams he held for his son; the devotion with which men served him. You see him there--a man snared by Destiny, a lonely figure with his light dimmed behind the glory of his son. Still, one must ask: What is the son but an extension of the father?
    from "Muad'Dib, Family Commentaries" by the Princess Irulan
----
With the Lady Jessica and Arrakis, the Bene Gesserit system of sowing implant-legends through the Missionaria Protectiva came to its full fruition. The wisdom of seeding the known universe with a prophecy pattern for the protection of B.G. personnel has long been appreciated, but never have we seen a condition-utextremis with more ideal mating of person and preparation. The prophetic legends had taken on Arrakis even to the extent of adopted labels (including Reverend Mother, canto and respondu, and most of the Shari-a panoplia propheticus). And it is generally accepted now that the Lady Jessica's latent abilities were grossly underestimated.
    from "Analysis: The Arrakeen Crisis" by the Princess Irulan
----
"Yueh! Yueh! Yueh!" goes the refrain. "A million deaths were not enough for Yueh!"
    from "A Child's History of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
Many have marked the speed with which Muad'Dib learned the necessities of Arrakis. The Bene Gesserit, of course, know the basis of this speed. For the others, we can say that Muad'Dib learned rapidly because his first training was in how to learn. And the first lesson of all was the basic trust that he could learn. It's shocking to find how many people do not believe they can learn, and how many more believe learning to be difficult. Muad'Dib knew that every experience carries its lesson.
    from "The Humanity of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
What had the Lady Jessica to sustain her in her time of trial? Think you carefully on this Bene Gesserit proverb and perhaps you will see: "Any road followed precisely to its end leads precisely nowhere. Climb the mountain just a little to test that it's a mountain. From the top of the mountain, you cannot see the mountain."
    from "Muad'Dib: Family Commentaries" by the Princess Irulan
----
It is said that the Duke Leto blinded himself to the perils of Arrakis, that he walked heedlessly into the pit. Would it not be more likely to suggest he had lived so long in the presence of extreme danger he misjudged a change in its intensity? Or is it possible he deliberately sacrificed himself that his son might find a better life? All evidence indicates the Duke was a man not easily hoodwinked.
    from "Muad'Dib: Family Commentaries" by the Princess Irulan
----
Over the exit of the Arrakeen landing field, crudely carved as though with a poor instrument, there was an inscription that Muad'Dib was to repeat many times. He say it that first night on Arrakis, having been brought to the ducal command post to participate in his father's first full staff conference. The words of the inscription were a plea to those leaving Arrakis, but they fell with dark import on the eyes of a boy who had just escaped a close brush with death. They said: "O you who know what we suffer here, do not forget us in your prayers."
    from "Manual of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
On that first day when Muad'Dib rode through the streets of Arrakeen with his family, some of the people along the way recalled the legends and the prophecy and they ventured to shout: "Mahdi!" But their shout was more a question than a statement, for as yet they could only hope he was the one foretold as the Lisan al-Gaib, the Voice from the Outer World. Their attention was focused, too, on the mother, because they had heard she was a Bene Gesserit and it was obvious to them that she was like the other Lisan al-Gaib.
    from "Manual of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
"There is probably no more terrible instant of enlightenment than the one in which you discover your father is a man--with human flesh."
    from "Collected Sayings of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
My father, the Padishah Emperor, took me by the hand one day and I sensed in the ways my mother had taught me that he was disturbed. He led me down the Hall of Portraits to the ego-likeness of the Duke Leto Atreides. I marked the strong resemblance between them--my father and this man in the portrait--both with thin, elegant faces and sharp features dominated by cold eyes. "Princess-daughter," my father said, "I would that you'd been older when it came time for this man to choose a woman." My father was 71 at the time and looking no older than the man in the portrait, and I was but 14, yet I remember deducing in that instant that my father secretly wished the Duke had been his son, and disliked the political necessities that made them enemies.
    "In My Father's House" by the Princess Irulan
----
Greatness is a transitory experience. It is never consistent. It depends in part upon the myth-making imagination of humankind. The person who experiences greatness must have a feeling for the myth he is in. He must reflect what is projected upon him. And he must have a strong sense of the sardonic. This is what uncouples him from belief in his own pretensions. The sardonic is all that permits him to move within himself. Without this quality, even occasional greatness will destroy a man.
    from "Collected Sayings of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
"There is no escape--we pay for the violence of our ancestors."
    from "The Collected Sayings of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
Do you wrestle with dreams? Do you contend with shadows? Do you move in a kind of sleep? Time has slipped away. Your life is stolen. You tarried with trifles, Victim of your folly.
    Dirge for Jamis on the Funeral Plain, from "Songs of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
There is a legend that the instant the Duke Leto Atreides died a meteor streaked across the skies above his ancestral palace on Caladan.
    the Princess Irulan: "Introduction to A Child's History of Muad'Dib"
----
O Seas of Caladan, O people of Duke Leto-- Citadel of Leto fallen, Fallen forever...
    from "Songs of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
When my father, the Padishah Emperor, heard of Duke Leto's death and the manner of it, he went into such a rage as we had never before seen. He blamed my mother and the compact forced on him to place a Bene Gesserit on the throne. He blamed the Guild and the evil old Baron. He blamed everyone in sight, not excepting even me, for he said I was a witch like all the others. And when I sought to comfort him, saying it was done according to an older law of self-preservation to which even the most ancient rulers gave allegiance, he sneered at me and asked if I thought him a weakling. I saw then that he had been aroused to this passion not by concern over the dead Duke but by what that death implied for all royalty. As I look back on it, I think there may have been some prescience in my father, too, for it is certain that his line and Muad'Dib's shared common ancestry.
    from "In My Father's House," by the Princess Irulan
----
Muad'Dib could indeed, see the Future, but you must understand the limits of this power. Think of sight. You have eyes, yet cannot see without light. If you are on the floor of a valley, you cannot see beyond your valley. Just so, Muad'Dib could not always choose to look across the mysterious terrain. He tells us that a single obscure decision of prophecy, perhaps the choice of one word over another, could change the entire aspect of the future. He tells us "The vision of time is broad, but when you pass through it, time becomes a narrow door." And always, he fought the temptation to choose a clear, safe course, warning "That path leads ever down into stagnation."
    from "Arrakis Awakening" by the Princess Irulan
----
At the age of fifteen, he had already learned silence.
    from "A Child's History of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
We came from Caladan--a paradise world for our form of life. There existed no need on Caladan to build a physical paradise or a paradise of the mind--we could see the actuality all around us. And the price we paid was the price men have always paid for achieving a paradise in this life.--we went soft, we lost our edge.
    from "Muad'Dib: Conversations" by the Princess Irulan
----
Family life of the Royal Creche is difficult for many people to understand, but I shall try to give you a capsule view of it. My father had only one real friend, I think. That was Count Hasimir Fenring, the genetic-eunuch and one of the deadliest fighters in the Imperium. The Count, a dapper and ugly little man, brought a new slave-concubine to my father one day and I was dispatched by my mother to spy on the proceedings. All of us spied on my father as a matter of self-protection. One of the slave-concubines permitted my father under the Bene Gesserit-Guild agreement could not, of course, bear a Royal Successor, but the intrigues were constant and oppressive in their similarity. We became adept, my mother and sisters and I, at avoiding subtle instruments of death. It may seem a dreadful thing to say, but I'm not at all sure my father was innocent in all these attempts. A Royal Family is not like other families. Here was a new slave-concubine, then, red-haired like my father, willowy and graceful. She had a dancer's muscles, and her training obviously had included neuro-enticement. My father looked at her for a long time as she postured unclothed before him. Finally he said: "She is too beautiful. We will save her as a gift." You have no idea how much consternation this restraint created in the Royal Creche. Subtlety and self-control were, after all, the most deadly threats to us all.
    "In My Father's House" by the Princess Irulan
----
This Fremen religious adaptation, then, is the source of what we now recognize as "The Pillars of the Universe," whose Qizara Tafwid are among us all with signs and proofs and prophecy. They bring us the Arrakeen mystical fusion whose profound beauty is typified by the stirring music built on the old forms, but stamped with the new awakening. Who has not heard and been deeply moved by "The Old Man's Hymn"?
I drove my feet through a desert
Whose mirage fluttered like a host.
Voracious for glory, greedy for danger,
I roamed the horizons of al-Kulab,
Watching time level mountains
In its search and its hunger for me.
And I saw the sparrows swiftly approach,
Bolder than the onrushing wolf.
They spread in the tree of my youth.
I heard the flock in my branches.
And was caught on their beaks and claws!
    from "Arrakis Awakening" by the Princess Irulan
----
Prophecy and prescience--How can they be put to the test in the face of the unanswered questions? Consider: How much is actual prediction of the "wave form" (as Muad'Dib referred to his vision-image) and how much is the prophet shaping the future to fit the prophecy? What of the harmonics inherent in the act of prophecy? Does the prophet see the future or does he see a line of weakness, a fault or cleavage that he may shatter with words or decisions as a diamond-cutter shatters his gem with a blow of a knife?
    "Private Reflections on Muad'Dib" by the princess Irulan
----
The Fremen were supreme in that quality the ancients called "spannungsbogen"--which is the self-imposed delay between desire for a thing and the act of reaching out to grasp that thing.
    from "The Wisdom of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
My father, the Padishah Emperor, was 72 yet looked no more than 35 the year he encompassed the death of Duke Leto and gave Arrakis back to the Harkonnens. He seldom appeared in public wearing other than a Sardaukar uniform and a Burseg's black helmet with the Imperial lion in gold upon its crest. The uniform was an open reminder of where his power lay. He was not always that blatant, though. When he wanted, he could radiate charm and sincerity, but I often wonder in these later days if anything about him was as it seemed. I think now he was a man fighting constantly to escape the bars of an invisible cage. You must remember that he was an emperor, father-head of a dynasty that reached back into the dimmest history. But we denied him a legal son. Was this not the most terrible defeat a ruler ever suffered? My mother obeyed her Sister Superiors where the Lady Jessica disobeyed. Which of them was the stronger? History already has answered.
    "In My Father's House" by the Princess Irulan
----
God created Arrakis to train the faithful.
    from "The Wisdom of Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
----
If you get up one more time than you fall you will make it through.
    Chinese Proverb
----
The words you speak today should be soft and tender... for tomorrow you may have to eat them.
----
It may be that those who do most, dream most.
    Stephen Leacock
----
Getting a movie made in Hollywood is like trying to grill a steak by having a succession of people coming into the room and breathing on it.
    Douglas Adams
----
"Only the skilled can judge the skillfulness, but that is not the same as judging the value of the result."
    Clive Staples Lewis (1898 - 1963), Source: preface to Paradise Lost.
----
"But how can the characters in a play guess the plot? We are not the playwright, we are not the producer, we are not even the audience. We are on the stage. To play well the scenes in which we are "on" concerns us much more than to guess about the scenes that follow it."
    Clive Staples Lewis (1898 - 1963), The World's Last Night
----
"I can imagine no man who will look with more horror on the End than a conscientious revolution­ary who has, in a sense sincerely, been justifying cruelties and injustices inflicted on millions of his contemporaries by the benefits which he hopes to confer on future generations: generations who, as one terrible moment now reveals to him, were never going to exist. Then he will see the massacres, the faked trials, the deportations, to be all ineffaceably real, an essential part, his part, in the drama that has just ended: while the future Utopia had never been anything but a fantasy."
    Clive Staples Lewis (1898 - 1963), The World's Last Night
----
"Christian Apocalyptic offers us no such hope. It does not even foretell, (which would be more tolerable to our habits of thought) a gradual decay. It foretells a sudden, violent end imposed from without; an extinguisher popped onto the candle, a brick flung at the gramophone, a curtain rung down on the play—"Halt!"
    Clive Staples Lewis (1898 - 1963), The World's Last Night
----
"The doctrine of the Second Coming teaches us that we do not and cannot know when the world drama will end. The curtain may be rung down at any moment: say, before you have finished reading this paragraph."
    Clive Staples Lewis (1898 - 1963), The World's Last Night
----
"The doctrine of the Second Coming has failed, so far as we are concerned, if it does not make us realize that at every moment of every year in our lives Donne's question "What if this present were the world's last night?" is equally relevant."
    Clive Staples Lewis (1898 - 1963), The World's Last Night
----
"Frantic administration of panaceas to the world is certainly discouraged by the reflection that "this present" might be "the world's last night"; sober work for the future, within the limits of ordinary morality and prudence, is not."
    Clive Staples Lewis (1898 - 1963), The World's Last Night
----
"For what comes is Judgment: happy are those whom it finds laboring in their vocations, whether they were merely going out to feed the pigs or laying good plans to deliver humanity a hundred years hence from some great evil. The curtain has indeed now fallen. Those pigs will never in fact be fed, the great campaign against White Slavery or Governmental Tyranny will never in fact proceed to victory. No matter; you were at your post when the Inspection came."
    Clive Staples Lewis (1898 - 1963), The World's Last Night
----
When I take action, I'm not going to fire a $2 million missile at a $10 empty tent and hit a camel in the butt. It's going to be decisive.
    George W. Bush 
----
waaayp - We Are Anxiously Awaiting Your Patches 
    Defined by oliebol
----
There is nobody as enslaved as the fanatic, the person in whom one impulse, one value, has assumed ascendancy over all others.
    Milton R. Sapirstein
----
To see what is right, and not to do it, is want of courage or of principle.
    Confucius
----
A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.
    Douglas Adams ,  Mostly Harmless
----
Anything that happens, happens.
Anything that, in happening, causes something else to happen, causes something else to happen.
Anything that, in happening, causes itself to happen again, happens again.
It doesn't necessarily do it in chronological order, though. 
    Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless
----
The history of the Galaxy has got a little muddled, for a number of reasons: partly because those who are trying to keep track of it have got a little muddled, but also because some very muddling things have been happening anyway.
    Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless
----
A generation which ignores history has no past and no future.
    Robert Heinlein ,  The Notebooks of Lazurus Long
----
History does not record anywhere at any time a religion that has any rational basis. Religion is a crutch for people not strong enough to stand up to the unknown without help. But, like dandruff, most people do have a religion and spend time and money on it and seem to derive considerable pleasure from fiddling with it.
    Robert Heinlein (1907 - 1988), Time Enough for Love (1972)
----
One man's "magic" is another man's engineering. "Supernatural" is a null word.
    Excerpt from the notebooks of Lazarus Long, from Robert Heinlein's "Time Enough for Love"
----
Democracy is based on the assumption that a million men are wiser than one man. How's that again? I missed something.
    Excerpt from the notebooks of Lazarus Long, from Robert Heinlein's "Time Enough for Love"
----
Men rarely (if ever) manage to dream up a god superior to themselves. Most gods have the manners and morals of a spoiled child.
    Excerpt from the notebooks of Lazarus Long, from Robert Heinlein's "Time Enough for Love"
----
One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
    Excerpt from the notebooks of Lazarus Long, from Robert Heinlein's "Time Enough for Love"
----
I've got a twisted sense of humor, and everything amuses me.
    Robert Heinlein (1907 - 1988), Beyond this Horizon
----
Where facts are few, experts are many.
    Donald R. Gannon
----
Share everything. Don't take things that aren't yours. Put things back where you found them.
    Robert Fulghum
----
There is hardly anybody good for everything, and there is scarcely anybody who is absolutely good for nothing.
    Lord Chesterfield
----
It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations.
    Sir Winston Churchill ,  My Early Life (1930)
----
The main dangers in this life are the people who want to change everything -- or nothing.
    Nancy Astor
----
Be wiser than other people, if you can, but do not tell them so.
    Lord Chesterfield
----
Choose your pleasures for yourself, and do not let them be imposed upon you.
    Lord Chesterfield
----
Know the true value of time; snatch, seize, and enjoy every moment of it. No idleness; no laziness; no procrastination; never put off till tomorrow what you can do today.
    Lord Chesterfield
----
Never seem more learned than the people you are with. Wear your learning like a pocket watch and keep it hidden. Do not pull it out to count the hours, but give the time when you are asked.
    Lord Chesterfield
----
[Common sense] is the best sense I know of.
    Lord Chesterfield
----
Wit is so shining a quality that everybody admires it; most people aim at it, all people fear it, and few love it unless in themselves.
    Lord Chesterfield, letter to his godson, December 18, 1765
----
The knowledge of the world is only to be acquired in the world, and not in a closet.
    Lord Chesterfield, Letters to His Son, 1746, published 1774
----
If you are not in fashion, you are nobody.
    Lord Chesterfield, "Letter to his son", April 30, 1750
----
An injury is much sooner forgotten than an insult.
    Lord Chesterfield, Letter to his son, October 9, 1746
----
Advice is seldom welcome, and those who need it the most, like it the least. 
    Lord Chesterfield
----
Better to understand a little than to misunderstand a lot. 
    Lord Chesterfield
----
Dispatch is the soul of business, and nothing contributes more to Dispatch than Method. 
    Lord Chesterfield
----
You must look into people, as well as at them. 
    Lord Chesterfield
----
Take care in your minutes, and the hours will take care of themselves. 
    Lord Chesterfield
----
Nature has hardly formed a woman ugly enough to be insensible to flattery upon her person. 
    Lord Chesterfield
----
History is a confused heap of facts. 
    Lord Chesterfield
----
Whatever is worth doing at all, is worth doing well. 
    Lord Chesterfield
----
Wear your learning, like a watch, in a private pocket: and do not pull it out and strike it, merely to show that you have one. 
    Lord Chesterfield
----
A man's own good breeding is the best security against other people's ill manners. 
    Lord Chesterfield
----
The fewer clear facts you have in support of an opinion, the stronger your emotional attachment to that opinion.
----
If we don't change our direction we're likely to end up where we're headed.
    Chinese Proverb
----
The 50-50-90 rule:  Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
----
Feeling good about government is like looking on the bright side of any catastrophe. When you quit looking on the bright side, the catastrophe is still there.
    P. J. O'Rourke ,  Parliament of Whores (1991)
----
A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
Fish is the only food that is considered spoiled once it smells like what it is.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
Very little is known of the Canadian country since it is rarely visited by anyone but the Queen and illiterate sport fishermen.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
    P.J. O'Rourke, Parliament of Whores
----
There's only one secret to bachelor cooking - not caring how it tastes.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
Politicians are interested in people. Not that this is always a virtue. Fleas are interested in dogs.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a "learning experience." Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've done as a "learning experience." It makes me feel less stupid.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then they get elected and prove it.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relative. Then you can not only be nothing, you can do nothing too.
    P. J. O'Rourke
----
After all, what is your host's purpose in having a party? Surely not for you to enjoy yourself; if that were their sole purpose, they'd have simply sent champagne and women over to your place by taxi.
    P. J. O'Rourke 
----
Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.
    P. J. O'Rourke 
----
Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.
    Scott Adams
----
Anger makes dull men witty, but it keeps them poor.
    Elizabeth I
----
It usually takes a long time to find a shorter way.
----
To be conscious that we are perceiving or thinking is to be conscious of our own existence.
    Aristotle ,  Nicomachean Ethics
----
The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn.
    David Russell
----
I'm a soldier, not a diplomat.  I can only tell the truth.
    Kirk, "Errand of Mercy", stardate 3198.9
----
Morfey is a virus don't add to contacts.
----
"It also makes C++ programmers feel like they know what's going on..."
    Seen at perlmod.pod
----
A Perl module would prefer that you stay out of its living room because you weren't invited, not because it has a shotgun.
    Seen at "Programming Perl" book
----
$cnt = $sky =~ tr/*/*/;     # count the stars in $sky
    Seen at "Programming Perl" book
----
WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH
    From 1984
----
Every age is fed on illusions, lest men should renounce life early and the human race come to an end.
    Joseph Conrad 
----
The wise learn many things from their enemies.
    Aristophanes ,  Birds (414 BC)
----
I think the world is run by 'C' students.
    Al McGuire
----
Where there is an open mind there will always be a frontier.
    Charles F. Kettering
----
To see what is in front of one's nose needs a constant struggle.
    George Orwell
----
Human beings are perhaps never more frightening than when they are convinced beyond doubt that they are right.
    Laurens Van der Post ,  The Lost World of the Kalahari (1958)
----
Oppression can only survive through silence.
    Carmen de Monteflores
----
In order for a war to be just, three things are necessary. First, the authority of the sovereign. Secondly, a just cause. Thirdly, a rightful intention.
    Saint Thomas Aquinas
----
Never argue with a fool. Someone watching may not be able to tell the difference.
----
Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful.
    Samuel Johnson
----
They're funny things, Accidents. You never have them till you're having them.
    A. A. Milne (Eeyore) ,  Pooh's Little Instruction Book
----
A man is very apt to complain of the ingratitude of those who have risen far above him.
    Samuel Johnson English author, critic, & lexicographer (1709 - 1784)
----
"How long does getting thin take?" Pooh asked anxiously.
    A. A. Milne (1882 - 1956)
----
I am a Bear of Very Little Brain, and long words bother me.
    A. A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
----
It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like "What about lunch?"
    Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne
----
Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day.
    Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne
----
A little Consideration, a little Thought for Others, makes all the difference.
    Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne
----
Always watch where you are going. Otherwise, you may step on a piece of the Forest that was left out by mistake.
    Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne
----
It's always useful to know where a friend-and-relation is, whether you want him or whether you don't.
    Rabbit, Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne
----
When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it.
    Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne
----
People who don't Think probably don't have Brains; rather, they have grey fluff that's blown into their heads by mistake.
    Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne
----
If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.
    Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne
----
You can't stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes.
    Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne
----
Those who are clever, who have a Brain, never understand anything.
    Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne
----
Don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can't hear, and not bothering.
    Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne
----
One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.
    A. A. Milne
----
If one is to be called a liar, one may as well make an effort to deserve the name.
    A.A. Milne
----
Insanity -- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
    R. D. Lang
----
* Now talking in #Democrats
<Gunman> is anybody here?
<Gunman> hmm...everybody's an op, but nobodys doing anything...
<Gunman> so im definately in the #democrats channel...
    Seen on Bash.org - #609999
----
<Numi> hey, can you guys just check a site out and tell me if it's up?
<Haddock> depends, what is it?
<Numi> just my apache server, it works for me but seems to be down for anyone else
<Haddock> alright, what's the address?
<Numi> http://127.0.0.1
<Haddock> ......
<Haddock> ...Yeah, it's up.
    Seen on Bash.org - #608521
----
<Dave> So my friend in school Andrew said he had linux
<Dave> After saying he got mIRC
<Dave> I told him you can't have both, mIRC is a windows Client
<Dave> Then he said he had Linux on his laptop
<Dave> I asked him what Distribution he had, he said wal-mart
    Seen on Bash.org - #608242
----
<Caskie> Ive gotta try and write a 17 page letter, but i dont kno what to write
<Fletch> Just write 'i am a fish' 400 times
<Caskie> no! :P, thats a waste of paper
<Fletch> Pfft,Im sick of people saying 'dont waste paper'. If trees wanted to live, they'd all carry guns
    Seen on Bash.org - #607291
----
<k2xl> in 1998, i made a C++ program to calculate pi to a billion digits.
<k2xl> i coded it on my laptop (pentium 2 i think) and then ran the program.
<k2xl> the next day i got a new laptop but decided to keep the program running.
<k2xl> it's been over seven years now since i ran it. and this morning it finished calculating.
<k2xl> the output:
<k2xl>      "THE VALUE OF PI TO THE BILLIONTH DIGIT IS = "
<k2xl> mindblowing eh?
<k2xl> i looked in the code of my program, and i found out that i forgot to output the value :(.
    Seen on Bash.org - #605501
----
Geekie: This chick was yelling at me when I was eating chicken nuggets at mcdonalds today.
Geekie: Like 'DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY DO TO THOSE ANIMAAAAAALS?!?'
Geekie: and this guy behind me goes 'Shut the fuck up, I'm trying to eat my puppy-burger.
Ashleh: What did she do?
Geekie: she stfu. and cried.
    Seen on Bash.org - #604861
----
Optimizations always bust things, because all optimizations are, in the long haul, a form of cheating, and cheaters eventually get caught. 
    Larry Wall
----
The strongest is never strong enough to be always the master, unless he transforms strength into right, and obedience into duty.
    Jean-Jacques Rousseau 
----
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.
    Aristotle
----
He who cannot be a good follower cannot be a good leader.
    Aristotle
----
Those that know, do. Those that understand, teach.
    Aristotle
----
We make war that we may live in peace.
    Aristotle, Nicomachean Ethics, bk. 10, ch. 7, sct. 1177b
----
Law is mind without reason.
    Aristotle 
----
What would I do if I had only six months left to live? I'd type faster.
    Isaac Asimov 
----
Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what's right.
    Isaac Asimov
----
Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.
    Isaac Asimov, Salvor Hardin in "Foundation"
----
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
    Isaac Asimov 
----
If knowledge can create problems, it is not through ignorance that we can solve them.
    Isaac Asimov 
----
A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.
    Douglas Adams, from his book "Mostly Harmless"
----
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
    Douglas Adams 
----
The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair.
    Douglas Adams, from his book "Mostly Harmless"
----
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.
    Douglas Adams 
----
Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the drug store, but that's just peanuts to space.
    Douglas Adams, from his book "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"
----
Humor is just another defense against the universe.
    Mel Brooks
----
Men willingly believe what they wish.
    Gaius Julius Caesar, De Bello Gallico
----
I really get a feeling of my increasing geekiness when I read these threads and find them funny.
    henriquemaia, seen on http://www.ubuntuforums.org/showthread.php?t=201079
----
There is no such thing as an objective vi vs. emacs comparison because it's hard to be objective when vi is obviously so much better 
    evs-chris, seen on http://www.ubuntuforums.org/showthread.php?t=201079
----
We learn something every day, and lots of times it's that what we learned the day before was wrong.
    Bill Vaughn
----
You are not angry with people when you laugh at them. Humor teaches them tolerance.
    W. Somerset Maugham
----
The future is not something we enter. The future is something we create.
    Leonard I. Sweet
----
One day President Roosevelt told me that he was asking publicly for suggestions about what the war should be called. I said at once 'The Unnecessary War'.
    Sir Winston Churchill ,  Second World War (1948)
----
The task of the leader is to get his people from where they are to where they have not been.
    Henry Kissinger
----
10. Specifications are for the weak and timid!
9. You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where you stand!
8. Indentation?! - I will show you how to indent when I indent your skull!
7. What is this talk of 'release'? Klingons do not make software 'releases'. Our software 'escapes' leaving a bloody trail of designers and quality assurance people in its wake.
6. Klingon function calls do not have 'parameters' - they have 'arguments' - and they ALWAYS WIN THEM.
5. Debugging? Klingons do not debug. Our software does not coddle the weak.
4. A TRUE Klingon Warrior does not comment on his code!
3. Klingon software does NOT have BUGS. It has FEATURES, and those features are too sophisticated for a Romulan pig like you to understand.
2. You cannot truly appreciate Dilbert unless you've read it in the original Klingon.
1. Our users will know fear and cower before our software! Ship it! Ship it and let them flee like the dogs they are! 
    Top 10 things likely to be overheard from a Klingon Programmer, http://www.annoyances.org/exec/show/article09-205
----
Get all the fools on your side and you can be elected to anything.
    Frank Dane
----
Men live in a fantasy world. I know this because I am one, and I actually receive my mail there.
    Scott Adams (1957 - )
----
You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.
    Scott Adams, The Dilbert Future
----
cg_n_inefficient_code=06017_N_Inefficient code
% Your statement seems dubious to the compiler.
    Seen on errore.msg of FreePascal
----
EMacs Asterisk Syntax Highlighting - emacs gurus: yet another proof that vim is the greatest is that there is a VIM syntax highlighting page but no emacs one. Look at the comments below.
    Seen on http://www.voip-info.org/wiki/view/vim+syntax+highlighting
----
If you lie to the compiler, it will get its revenge.
    Henry Spencer
----
Trying to outsmart a compiler defeats much of the purpose of using one.
    Kernighan & Plauger, The Elements of Programming Style.
----
It's hard enough to find an error in your code when you're looking for it; it's even harder when you've assumed your code is error-free.
    Steve McConnell Code Complete
----
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization.
    Gerald Weinberg
----
Programming can be fun, so can cryptography; however they should not be combined.
    Kreitzberg and Shneiderman
----
Testing by itself does not improve software quality. Test results are an indicator of quality, but in and of themselves, they don't improve it. Trying to improve software quality by increasing the amount of testing is like trying to lose weight by weighing yourself more often. What you eat before you step onto the scale determines how much you will weigh, and the software development techniques you use determine how many errors testing will find. If you want to lose weight, don't buy a new scale; change your diet. If you want to improve your software, don't test more; develop better.
    Steve McConnell Code Complete
----
Once a new technology starts rolling, if you're not part of the steamroller, you're part of the road.
    Stewart Brand
----
The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it.
    Flannery O'Connor
----
Let us change our traditional attitude to the construction of programs. Instead of imagining that our main task is to instruct a computer what to to, let us concentrate rather on explaining to human beings what we want a computer to do.
    Donald Knuth
----
Be careful about using the following code -- I've only proven that it works, I haven't tested it.
    Donald Knuth
----
Computers are good at following instructions, but not at reading your mind.
    Donald Knuth
----
"... the designer of a new system must not only be the implementor and the first large-scale user; the designer should also write the first user manual. ... If I had not participated fully in all these activities, literally hundreds of improvements would never have been made, because I would never have thought of them or perceived why they were important.
    Donald Knuth"
----
Good code is its own best documentation. As you're about to add a comment, ask yourself, 'How can I improve the code so that this comment isn't needed?' Improve the code and then document it to make it even clearer.
    Steve McConnell Code Complete
----
Success is the happy feeling you get between the time you do something and the time you tell a woman what you did.
    Dilbet, 2006091116330
----
ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year. 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
WITNESS: Forty-five years. 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan. 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo. 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty year old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty. 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Would you repeat the question? 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him! 
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
    Seen at, http://www.moronland.com/moronia/moron/919/
----
"Open source way of thinking is like "drinks on the house" with the ability to stay on-line after"
    Adir Vered
----
They have computers, and they may have other weapons of mass destruction. 
    Janet Reno
----
I think computer viruses should count as life. I think it says something about human nature that the only form of life we have created so far is purely destructive. We've created life in our own image.
    Stephen Hawking
----
If it keeps up, man will atrophy all his limbs but the push-button finger. 
    Frank Lloyd Wright
----
ining the workforce of tomorrow with today's high schools is like trying to teach kids about today's computers on a 50-year-old mainframe. 
    Bill Gates in 2005
----
If software were as unreliable as economic theory, there wouldn't be a plane made of anything other than paper that could get off the ground.
    Jim Fawcette
----
Computers are like bikinis. They save people a lot of guesswork. 
    Sam Ewing
----
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside. 
    "Robert X. Cringely", Computerworld
----
All parts should go together without forcing. You must remember that the parts you are reassembling were disassembled by you. Therefore, if you can't get them together again, there must be a reason. By all means, do not use a hammer. 
    1925 IBM Maintenence Manual
----
Technical people are better off not looking at patents. If somebody sues you, you change the algorithm or you just hire a hit-man to whack the stupid git. 
    Linus Torvalds
----
Considering the current sad state of our computer programs, software development is clearly still a black art, and cannot yet be called an engineering discipline. 
    Bill Clinton
----
At this time I do not have a personal relationship with a computer. 
    Janet Reno
----
For a long time it puzzled me how something so expensive, so leading edge, could be so useless, and then it occurred to me that a computer is a stupid machine with the ability to do incredibly smart things, while computer programmers are smart people with the ability to do incredibly stupid things. They are, in short, a perfect match.
    Bill Bryson
----
The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.
    B. F. Skinner
----
Kirk: Do you want to know something? Everybody's human.
Spock: I find that remark insulting. 
    "Star Trek"
----
There's an old story about the person who wished his computer were as easy to use as his telephone. That wish has come true, since I no longer know how to use my telephone. 
    Bjarne Stroustrup
----
I think and think for months and years. Ninety-nine times, the conclusion is false. The hundredth time I am right. 
    Albert Einstein
----
The first rule of any technology used in a business is that automation applied to an efficient operation will magnify the efficiency. The second is that automation applied to an inefficient operation will magnify the inefficiency. 
    Bill Gates
----
See, no matter how clever your automation systems might be, it all falls apart if your human wetware isn't up to the job. 
    Andrew Orlowski
----
That's the thing about people who think they hate computers. What they really hate is lousy programmers.
    Larry Niven
----
On the Internet, nobody knows you're a dog. 
    Peter Steiner
----
Standards are always out of date. That's what makes them standards. 
    Alan Bennett
----
Scotty: She's all yours, sir. All systems automated and ready. A chimpanzee and two trainees could run her!
Kirk: Thank you, Mr. Scott, I'll try not to take that personally. 
    Star Trek
----
I just found out that the brain is like a computer. If that's true, then there really aren't any stupid people. Just people running DOS.
----
People sould not fear their governments, governments should fear their people.
   Seen at /. - http://yro.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=213586&cid=17363716
----
Before we can start, make sure you have the following:
1. Computer with installed Linux OS
2. Asterisk's installation packages
3. Some free time to spend ;o)
4. An IQ higher than the freezing point of water (in Celsius)
   Seen at http://www.asteriskguru.com/tutorials/basic_installation_information_asterisk_from_source.html
----
"Sometimes lies were more dependable than the truth."
   From Ender's Game
----
"The power to cause pain is the only power that matters, the power to kill and destroy, because if you can't kill then you are always subject to those who can, and nothing and no one will ever save you."
   From Ender's Game
----
"I've lived too long with pain. I won't know who I am without it." 
   Ender Wiggin to Valentine Wiggin, from Ender's Game
----
"I think it's impossible to really understand somebody, what they want, what they believe, and not love them the way they love themselves."
   From Ender's Game
----
[why he attacked a boy who was down] "Knocking him down won the first fight. I wanted to win all the next ones too."
   From Ender's Game
----
All is going well, very well. I couldn't ask for anything better- So Why do I hate my life?
   From Ender's Game
----
He had the respect of everyone, and he was treated with deference in his evening practices. Commanders came to study what he did. Other soldiers approached his table at mess and asked permission to sit down. Even the teachers were respectful. He had so much damn respect he wanted to scream.
   From Ender's Game
----
"I need you to be clever Bean. I need you to think of solutions to problems we haven't seen yet. I want you to try things that no one has ever tried because they're absolutely stupid."
   From Ender's Game
----
Ender knew at this moment he might be able to walk out of the room and end the battle. But the battle would only be fought again. Again and again until the will to fight was finished. The only way to end things completely was to hurt Bonzo enough that his fear was stronger than his hate.
   From Ender's Game
----
"I keep thinking of things I don't want to remember. My whole life keeps playing out as if I were a recorder and someone else wanted to watch the most terrible parts of my life."
   From Ender's Game
----
"We have to go. I'm almost happy here."
   From Ender's Game
----
It was just him and me. He fought with honor. If it weren't for his honor, he and the others would have beaten me together. They might have killed me, then. His sense of honor saved my life. I didn't fight with honor... I fought to win.
   From Ender's Game
----
Thank you for this... For dry eyes and silent weeping. You taught me how to hide anything I felt. More than ever, I need that now.
   From Ender's Game
----
How far should one accept the rules of the society in which one lives? To put it another way: at what point does conformity become corruption? Only by answering such questions does the conscience truly define itself.
   Kenneth Tynan
----
Think if you want to stay alive. Fear will kill you if you don't control it.
   Elyas Machera, The Eye of the World
----
You read too much and understand too little.
   Moiraine Damodred, The Shadow Rising
----
Only the man who could look into the future without worry could thoroughly enjoy the present.
----
There's no patriotism, that's what it is. And no matriotism, either.
   Catch 22
----
He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.
   Catch 22
----
iam a phd remember.. i dont have skills!
----
I must admit, kernel developers do a really good job to piss off people,
we can't do better.
   Florian Klaempfl
----
How should I know if it works? That's what beta testers are for. I only coded it
   Linus Torvalds
----
I'm an idiot.. At least this one [bug] took about 5 minutes to find...
   Linus Torvalds
----
If you want to travel around the world and be invited to speak at a lot of different places, just write a Unix operating system.
   Linus Torvalds
----
Really, I'm not out to destroy Microsoft. That will just be a completely unintentional side effect. 
   Linus Torvalds, (NewYork Times interview)
----
An infinite number of monkeys typing into GNU emacs would never make a good program.
   Linus Torvalds
----
Hey, maybe I could apply for a saint-hood from the Pope. Does somebody know what his email-address is? I'm so nice it makes you puke.
   Linus Torvalds (taken from Linus's reply to someone worried about the future of Linux)
----
When you say "I wrote a program that crashed Windows", people just stare atyou blankly and say "Hey, I got those with the system, *for free*"
   Linus Torvalds
----
Other than the fact Linux has a cool name, could someone explain why I should use Linux over BSD? No. That's it. The cool name, that is. We worked very hard on creating a name that would appeal to the majority of people, and it certainly paid off: thousands of people are using linux just to be able to say "OS/2? Hah. I've got Linux. What a cool name". 386BSD made the mistake of putting a lot of numbers and weird abbreviations into the name, and is scaring away a lot of people just because it sounds too technical.
   Linus Torvalds (Linus Torvalds' follow-up to a question about Linux)
----
The day people think linux would be better served by somebody else (FSF being the natural alternative), I'll "abdicate". I don't think that it's something people have to worry about right now - I don't see it happening in the near future. I enjoy doing linux, even though it does mean some work, and I haven't gotten any complaints (some almost timid reminders about a patch I have forgotten or ignored, but nothing negative so far). Don't take the above to mean that I'll stop the day somebody complains: I'm thick-skinned (Lasu, who is reading this over my shoulder commented that "thick-HEADED is closer to the truth") enough to take some abuse. If I weren't, I'd have stopped developing linux the day ast ridiculed me on c.o.minix. What I mean is just that while linux has been my baby so far, I don't want to stand in the way if people want to make something better of it.
   Linus Torvalds
----
Intelligence is the ability to avoid doing work, yet getting the work done.
   Linus Torvalds
----
Narn: "What is truth and what is god?"
G'Kar: "Truth is a river. (Narns gasp)"
Narn: "And what is god?"
G'Kar: "God is the mouth of the river."
   Babylon 5
----
"I'm going to f---ing bury that guy, I have done it before, and I will do it again. I'm going to f---ing kill Google.
   Steve Ballmer, http://www.smh.com.au/news/technology/microsoft-ceo-im-going-to-fing-kill-google/2005/09/03/1125302772214.html
----
Linux is a cancer that attaches itself in an intellectual property sense to everything it touches.
   Steve Ballmer, Chicago Sun-Times
----
My children - in many dimensions they're as poorly behaved as many other children, but at least on this dimension I've got my kids brainwashed: You don't use Google, and you don't use an iPod.
   Steve Ballmer, http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/fortune_archive/2006/04/03/8373041/index.htm
----
We've had DRM in Windows for years. The most common format of music on an iPod is "stolen".
   Steve Ballmer, http://www.theregister.co.uk/2004/10/07/ballmer_doesnt_get_it/
----
I have never, honestly, thrown a chair in my life.
   Steve Ballmer, http://www.news.com/Ballmer-Trusting-Vista,-battling-Google/2100-1012_3-5902168.html?tag=nl.caro
----
Google's not a real company. It's a house of cards.
   Steve Ballmer
----
There's no chance that the iPhone is going to get any significant market share. No chance.
   Steve Ballmer
----
We don't have a monopoly. We have market share. There's a difference.
   Steve Ballmer
----
DRM is the future.
   Steve Ballmer
----
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
----
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
   Dean Martin
----
An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.
   Dylan Thomas
----
Beer is not a good cocktail-party drink, especially in a home where you don't know where the bathroom is.
   Billy Carter
----
I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a prefrontal lobotomy
   Tom Waits
----
Somebody left the cork out of my lunch
   W.C. Fields
----
Drinking is a way of ending the day.
   Ernest Hemingway
----
There was nothing really as glorious as a good beer shit - I mean after drinking twenty or twenty-five beers the night before. The odor of a beer shit like that spread all around and stayed for a good hour-and-a-half. It made you realize that you were really alive.
   Charles Bukowski
----
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day
   Frank Sinatra
----
I drink to make other people interesting
   George Jean Nathan
----
Propaganda is a soft weapon; hold it in your hands too long, and it will move about like a snake, and strike the other way
   Jean Anouilh, L'Alouette, 1952
----
One of the most horrible features of war is that all the war-propaganda, all the screaming and lies and hatred, comes invariably from people who are not fighting.
   George Orwell, Homage to Catalonia, 1938
----
When any government, or any church for that matter, undertakes to say to its subjects, 'This you may not read, this you must not see, this you are forbidden to know,' the end result is tyranny and oppression, no matter how holy the motives. Mighty little force is needed to control a man whose mind has been hoodwinked; contrariwise, no amount of force can control a free man, a man whose mind is free. No, not the rack, not fission bombs, not anything'you can't conquer a free man; the most you can do is kill him.
   Robert A. Heinlein, If This Goes On, 1940
----
Only the mob and the elite can be attracted by the momentum of totalitarianism itself. The masses have to be won by propaganda
   Hannah Arendt, The Origins of Totalitarianism, 1951
----
Propaganda is to a democracy what the bludgeon is to a totalitarian state.
   Noam Chomsky, Media Control: The Spectacular Achievements of Propaganda, 1997
----
As societies grow decadent, the language grows decadent, too. Words are used to disguise, not to illuminate, action: You liberate a city by destroying it. Words are used to confuse, so that at election time people will solemnly vote against their own interests.
   Gore Vidal, Imperial America, 2004
----
A great deal of intelligence can be invested in ignorance when the need for illusion is deep
   Saul Bellow, To Jerusalem and Back, 1976
----
Men, it has been well said, think in herds; it will be seen that they go mad in herds, while they only recover their senses slowly, and one by one
   Charles Mackay, Extraordinary Popular Delusions and the Madness of Crowds, 1841
----
He who wants to persuade should put his trust not in the right argument, but in the right word. The power of sound has always been greater than the power of sense
   Joseph Conrad, Lord Jim, 1900
----
It is worthy of remark that a belief constantly inculcated during the early years of life, whilst the brain is impressible, appears to acquire almost the nature of an instinct; and the very essence of an instinct is that it is followed independently of reason
   Charles Darwin, The Descent of Man, 1871
----
There once was a virtualization coder,
Whose patches kept getting older,
Each time upstream would drop,
His documentation would slightly rot,
SO APPLY MY F*$KING PATCHES OR I'LL KEEP WRITING LIMERICKS.
   Rusty Russel
----
Just because code is clever doesn't mean it should go in. There are enough things in the kernel which have to be complex that we should always be on the lookout for things which can be made simpler.
   Rusty Russell, in a November 15th, 2007 message on the Linux Kernel mailing list.
----
The greatest problem of communication is the illusion that it has been accomplished. 
   George Bernard Shaw
----
It's not at all important to get it right the first time. It's vitally important to get it right the last time. 
   Andrew Hunt and David Thomas
----
Learning is not compulsory. Neither is survival. 
   W. Edwards Deming
----
Good judgement comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgement.
   Fred Brooks
----
I have always found that plans are useless, but planning is indispensable. 
   Dwight Eisenhower
----
Enjoying success requires the ability to adapt. Only by being open to change will you have a true opportunity to get the most from your talent. 
   Nolan Ryan
----
In war as in life, it is often necessary when some cherished scheme has failed, to take up the best alternative open, and if so, it is folly not to work for it with all your might. 
   Winston Churchill
----
Anyone can dabble, but once you've made that commitment, your blood has that particular thing in it, and it's very hard for people to stop you.
   Bill Cosby
----
One person with passion is better than forty people merely interested. 
   E. M. Forster
----
... Thous who are capable (and some that don't) use Pascal, the others, just say dou' (Homer Simpson like) every other line of code.
   Ido Kanner, Explainin someone why he uses Pascal
----
It was true that I didn't have much ambition, but there ought to be a place for people without ambition, I mean a better place than the one usually reserved. How in the hell could a man enjoy being awakened at 6:30 a.m. by an alarm clock, leap out of bed, dress, force-feed, shit, piss, brush teeth and hair, and fight traffic to get to a place where essentially you made lots of money for somebody else and were asked to be grateful for the opportunity to do so?
   Charles Bukowski, Factotum, Black Sparrow Press, 1975
----
My job consists of basically masking my contempt for the assholes in charge, and, at least once a day, retiring to the men's room so I can jerk off while I fantasize about a life that doesn't so closely resemble Hell.
   American Beauty, 1999
----
One of the saddest things is that the only thing that a man can do for eight hours a day, day after day, is work. You can't eat eight hours a day nor drink for eight hours a day nor make love for eight hours'all you can do for eight hours is work. Which is the reason why man makes himself and everybody else so miserable and unhappy.
   William Faulkner, interview in Writers at Work, 1958
----
Industrial man'a sentient reciprocating engine having a fluctuating output, coupled to an iron wheel revolving with uniform velocity. And then we wonder why this should be the golden age of revolution and mental derangement.
   Aldous Huxley, Time Must Have a Stop, 1944
----
I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables'slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war . . . our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires and movie gods and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off. 
   Fight Club, 1999
----
Work is the refuge of people who have nothing better to do.
   Oscar Wilde
----
For us to live any other way was nuts. Uh, to us, those goody-good people who worked shitty jobs for bum paychecks and took the subway to work every day, and worried about their bills, were dead. I mean they were suckers. They had no balls. If we wanted something we just took it. If anyone complained twice they got hit so bad, believe me, they never complained again. 
   Goodfellas, 1990
----
But men labor under a mistake. The better part of the man is soon ploughed into the soil for compost. By a seeming fate, commonly called necessity, they are employed, as it says in the old book, laying up treasures which moth and rust will corrupt and thieves break through and steal. It is a fool's life, as they will find when they get to the end of it, if not before.
   Henry David Thoreau, Walden, 1854
----
We don't have a lot of time on this earth! We weren't meant to spend it this way. Human beings were not meant to sit in little cubicles staring at computer screens all day, filling out useless forms and listening to eight different bosses drone on about about mission statements. 
   Office Space, 1999
----
As you all know by now, this is the 51st annual Academy Awards. Two hours of sparkling entertainment spread out over a four-hour show.
   Johnny Carson, host, Academy Award ceremony, 1979
----
Good evening, Hollywood phonies.
   Chevy Chase, salutation, hosting the Academy Award ceremony, 1988
----
I never watched the Oscars. Come on, it's a fashion show . . . What straight black man sits there and watches the Oscars? Show me one. And they don't recognize comedy, and you don't see a lot of black people nominated, so why should I watch it? 
   Chris Rock, 77th Academy Awards host, quoted in Entertainment Weekly, 2005
----
The solemnity of the annual Nobel ceremonies in Stockholm with the cheerful bad taste of the grand opening of a shopping center in Los Angeles.
   Vincent Canby, describing the Academy Award ceremony, 1983
----
What does the Academy Award mean? I don't think it means much of anything.
   Sally Field, 1980
----
I have no regard for that kind of ceremony. I just don't think they know what they're doing. When you see who wins those things'or who doesn't win them'you can see how meaningless this Oscar thing is.
   Woody Allen, 1978
----
Awards are meaningless for actors, unless they all play the same part.
   Humphrey Bogart, 1943
----
The Academy Awards are obscene, dirty . . . no better than a beauty contest.
   Dustin Hoffman, 1975
----
The (Academy Award) ceremonies are a two-hour meat parade, a public display with contrived suspense for economic reasons.
   George C. Scott, declining the Oscar for Best Actor, 1971
----
Hello, my name is Sacheen Littlefeather. I'm Apache and president of the National Native American Affirmative Action Committee. I'm representing Marlon Brando tonight and he's asked me to tell you in a very long speech which I cannot share with you presently because of time that he very regretfully cannot accept their very generous award and the reasons for this being the treatment of American Indians by the film industry.
   Sacheen Littlefeather (Maria Cruz), declining Brando's Best Actor Award for The Godfather, 1973 Academy Awards
----
Before I knowed it, I was sayin' out loud, 'The hell with it! There ain't no sin and there ain't no virtue. There's just stuff people do. It's all part of the same thing.'
   The Grapes of Wrath [1939] John Steinbeck
----
Ravished! How ravished one could be without ever being touched. Ravished by dead words become obscene, and dead ideas become obsessions.
   Lady Chatterley's Lover [1928] D. H. Lawrence
----
All this happened, more or less. The war parts, anyway, are pretty much true. One guy I knew really was shot in Dresden for taking a teapot that wasn't his. Another guy I knew really did threaten to have his personal enemies killed by hired gunmen after the war. And so on. I've changed all the names.
   Slaughterhouse-Five [1969] Kurt Vonnegut
----
The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.
   To Kill a Mockingbird [1960] Harper Lee
----
The sun burnt every day. It burnt Time. The world rushed in a circle and turned on its axis and time was busy burning the years and the people anyway, without any help from him. So if he burnt things with the firemen and the sun burnt Time, that meant that everything burnt!
   Fahrenheit 451 [1953] Ray Bradbury
----
It was that kind of a crazy afternoon, terrifically cold, and no sun out or anything, and you felt like you were disappearing every time you crossed a road.
   The Catcher in the Rye [1951] J.D. Salinger
----
"I believe that today more than ever a book should be sought after even if it has only one great page in it. We must search for fragments, splinters, toenails, anything that has ore in it, anything that is capable of resuscitating the body and the soul.
   Tropic of Cancer [1934] Henry Miller
----
The Planet drifts to random insect doom...
   Naked Lunch [1959] William S. Burroughs
----
History...is a nightmare from which I am trying to awake.
   Ulysses [1922] James Joyce
----
Day by day and almost minute by minute the past was brought up to date. In this way every prediction made by the Party could be shown by documentary evidence to have been correct; nor was any item of news, or any expression of opinion, which conflicted with the needs of the moment, ever allowed to remain on record. All history was a palimpsest, scraped clean and reinscribed exactly as often as was necessary.
   1984 [1949] George Orwell
----
Christmas is awesome. First of all you get to spend time with people you love. Secondly, you can get drunk and no one can say anything. Third, you give presents. What's better than giving presents? And fourth, getting presents. So four things. Not bad for one day. It's really the greatest day of all time.
   From The Office
----
I hate Christmas. The mall is full of nothing but women and children. All you hear is 'I want this,' 'Get me this,' 'I have to have this' . . . and then there's the children. And they're all by my store 'cause they stuck the mall Santa right outside ringing his stupid bell. As if you need a bell to notice a 300-pound alcoholic in a red suit. 'Ho, ho, ho,' all day long. So, nice as can be, I go outside, ask him to shut the hell up. He takes a swing at me. So I lay a hook into his fat belly and he goes down. Beard comes off, all the kids start crying and I'm the bad guy.
   Al Bundy in Married . . . With Children
----
You see Santa Claus tonight you better run boy, you better run for ya life! . . . You scared, ain't you? You should be! Christmas Eve is the scariest damn night of the year!
   Silent Night, Deadly Night 
----
Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind
   John F. Kennedy
----
Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose. 
   Helen Keller
----
When you know a thing, to hold that you know it; and when you do not know a thing, to allow that you do not know it - this is knowledge. 
   Confucius ,  The Confucian Analects
----
Reason and free inquiry are the only effectual agents against error. 
   Thomas Jefferson ,  Notes on the State of Virginia
----
There are only two ways by which to rise in this world, either by one's own industry or by the stupidity of others. 
   Jean de LaBruyere
----
Every man has his follies -- and often they are the most interesting thing he had got. 
   Josh Billings
----
You are only as wise as others perceive you to be. 
   M. Shawn Cole
----
The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man. 
   George Bernard Shaw
----
And when it rains on your parade, look up rather than down. Without the rain, there would be no rainbow. 
   Jerry Chin
----
The great thing about mod_rewrite is it gives you all the configurability and flexibility of Sendmail. The downside to mod_rewrite is that it gives you all the configurability and flexibility of Sendmail.
   Brian Behlendorf, Apache Group 
----
Windows is not an operating system, it is a virtual emulation for testing hardware and software reaction for overloading a computer
   Ido Kanner, A conversation regarding the usage of Windows virtualization
----
> I am looking for a Python trainer so we can start offering
> Python training to our customers.

Must... Resist... Oh what the heck.

(read with a heavy southern India accent)

Hello, my name is Ashish Khare, I've been a python trainer for
fourteen years under the great Ranjan of Pushkar, I would love to
train any python that you have, I also do cobra and rattle snakes. I
am highly experienced and my pythons have only bitten 3 people so far,
one of them tried to actually grab it by the teeth, imagine that. No
fatalities so far. I have my own basket and flute and willing to
relocate.

Please call Ashish +91 (98) 1137-7803 for more details.

   Arik Baratz in http://permalink.gmane.org/gmane.comp.python.israel/427
----
my name is Inigo Montoya, you (have tried) to kill my compiler, prepare to die
----
Two men look out through the same bars: One sees the mud and one the stars.
   Frederick Langbridge (1849 - 1923)
----
Marvin: I think you ought to know I'm feeling very depressed.
Trillian: Well, we have something that may take your mind off it.
Marvin: It won't work, I have an exceptionally large mind.
Trillian: Yeah, we know. 
   From The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
----
Marvin: You can blame the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation for making androids with GPP...
Arthur: Um... what's GPP?
Marvin: Genuine People Personalities. I'm a personality prototype. You can tell, can't you...? 
   From The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
----
Marvin: [as they are gazing at the wonder of Magrathea] Incredible... it's even worse than I thought it would be.
   From The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
----
[Arthur and Ford have each been unexpectedly hit in the face by some unknown flyswatter-like thing]
Zaphod: [after finally also being hit in the face] Zarquon! What was that? Geez...
Marvin: [depressed] I'd make a suggestion, but you wouldn't listen.
[even more depressed]
Marvin: No one ever does. 
   From The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
----
Marvin: [as Vogons fire at the group] Don't see what the big deal is... Vogons are some of the worst shots in the galaxy...
Marvin: [one hits Marvin, leaving a smoking hole in his head. he turns] Now I've got a headache! 
   From The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
----
Marvin: Freeze? I'm a robot. I'm not a refrigerator. 
   From The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
----
Marvin: I've been talking to the main computer.
Arthur: And?
Marvin: It hates me. 
   From The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
----
[last lines]
Marvin: Not that anyone cares what I think, but the restaurant is at the *other* end of the Universe. 
   From The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
----
Marvin: I've calculated your chance of survival, but I don't think you'll like it. 
   From The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
----
> Subject: Microsoft Office Communications Server
>
> Has anyone done any integration with this?
>
> All I know so far is that it appears to use some non standard form of
> SIP.
>
> Any pointers?
>
<sarcasm>
What!? Microsoft implementing something not compliant with official
standards. Your kidding?
</sarcasm>
   David Cook, Asterisk users malling list
----
>> Sorry, we dont have telepathy abilities...
>>
>
> Can you add telepathy abilities to the next Lazarus version?
>
> That would be great!
>
This is for Mattias - he is our innovation manager.
   Paul Ishenin, Lazarus malling list
----
Sometimes the appropriate response to reality is to go insane.
   Philip K. Dick, Valis, US science fiction author (1928 - 1982)
----
<durn> are u _the_ r0b0c0d?
<r0b0c0d> yes bish
<durn> omfg everyone is talking about u, u ddos attacking dalnet??
<r0b0c0d> is the pope fuckin old?
   Seen at Bash.org  #44695
----
<jcarle> We don't have SATs in canada.
<jcarle> All our words stop at 6 letters.
   Seen at Bash.org, #71437
----
<abcbooze> a patriot missle shot down a british aircraft
<i8> Damn British pilots flying into our missiles...
   Seem at Bash.org, #82222
----
Topic in #os: hey guyz, stop pickin on irix.
<SCO> w00t! i bought unix! im gonna b so rich!
<novell> /msg atnt haha. idiot.
<novell> whoops. was that out loud?
<atnt> rotfl
<ibm> lol
<SCO> why r u laffin at me?
<novell> dude, unix is so 10 years ago. linux is in now.
<SCO> wtf?
<SCO> hey guyz, i bought caldera, I have linux now.
<red_hat> haha, your linux sucks.
<novell> lol
<atnt> lol
<ibm> lol
<SCO> no wayz, i will sell more linux than u!
<ibm> your linux sucks, you should look at SuSE
<SuSE> Ja. Wir bilden gutes Linux f�r IBM.
<SCO> can we do linux with you?
<SuSE> Ich bin nicht sicher...
<ibm> *cough*
<SuSE> Gut lassen Sie uns vereinigen.
* SuSE is now SuSE[UL]
* SCO is now caldera[UL]
<turbolinux> can we play?
<conectiva> we're bored... we'll go too.
<ibm> sure!
* turbolinux is now turbolinux[UL]
* conectiva is now conectiva[UL]
<ibm> redhat: you should join!
<SuSE[UL]> Ja! Wir sind vereinigtes Linux. Widerstand ist vergeblich.
<red_hat> haha. no.
<red_hat> lamers.
<ibm> what about you debian?
<debian> we'll discuss it and let you know in 5 years.
<caldera[UL]> no one wants my linux!
<turbolinux[UL]> i got owned.
<caldera[UL]> u all tricked me. linux is lame.
* caldera[UL] is now known as SCO
<SCO> i'm going back to unix.
<SGI> yeah! want to do unix with me?
<SCO> haha. no. lamer.
<novell> lol
<ibm> snap!
<SGI> :~(
<SCO> hey, u shut up. im gonna sue u ibm.
<ibm> wtf?
<SCO> yea, you stole all the good stuff from unix.
<red_hat> lol
<SuSE[UL]> heraus laut lachen
<ibm> lol
<SCO> shutup. i'm gonna email all your friends and tell them you suck.
<ibm> go ahead. baby.
<SCO> andandand... i revoke your unix! how do you like that?
<ibm> oh no, you didn't. AIX is forever.
<novell> actually, we still own unix, you can't do that.
<SCO> wtf? we bought it from u.
<novell> whoops. our bad.
<SCO> i own u. haha
<SCO> ibm: give me all your AIX now!
<ibm> whatever. lamer.
* ibm sets mode +b SCO!*@*
* SCO has been kicked from #os (own this.)
   Seen at Bash.org, #106579
----
<@LZ|5133p> gonna have to rebuild my fish tank tomorrow
<@LZ|5133p> getting a new filter
<@LZ|5133p> and fish
<+Toba> pkg_delete fish-tank-1.0.23b
<+Toba> cd /usr/ports/fish/fish-tank-1.2.43c
<+Toba> make all install clean -WITH_FILTER -WITH_FISH
   Seen at Bash.org, #477843
----
<Cyan> Some dude tried to break in last night at like 2am, but I was on the comp and it's like right beside the window so I heard the faggot.
<Cyan> Anyways, I grabbed the folding chair and as soon as he was like halfway through I beat the fucking shit out of him.
<Cyan> So he's laying here unconscious and I call the cops. Once they get here, they search him and look at what he fucking had:
<Cyan> 8 track tape (unlabeled), Flashlight (no batteries), Half eaten box of Fig Newtons, Measuring tape, Instructions to "Monopoly."
<dan> Dude, you fucking killed McGuyver!
   Seen at Bash.org, #823214
----
Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later!
   Brooks Law 
----
The best way to get a project done faster is to start sooner
   Jim Highsmith
----
Even the best planning is not so omniscient as to get it right the first time
   Fred Brooks
----
How does a project get to be a year late?... One day at a time.
   Fred Brooks
----
The bearing of a child takes nine months, no matter how many women are assigned. Many software tasks have this characteristic because of the sequential nature of debugging
   Fred Brooks
----
Plan to throw one (implementation) away; you will, anyhow
   Fred Brooks
----
Every good work of software starts by scratching a developer's personal itch
----
Perfection (in design) is achieved not when there is nothing more to add, but rather when there is nothing more to take away
   Antoine de Saint-Exupery
----
Any fool can write code that a computer can understand. Good programmers write code that humans can understand.
   Martin Fowler
----
Program testing can be used to show the presence of bugs, but never to show their absence!
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
The belief that complex systems require armies of designers and programmers is wrong. A system that is not understood in its entirety, or at least to a significant degree of detail by a single individual, should probably not be built.
   Niklaus Wirth 
----
A primary cause of complexity is that software vendors uncritically adopt almost any feature that users want.
   Niklaus Wirth
----
Prolific programmers contribute to certain disaster.
   Niklaus Wirth
----
Documentation is the castor oil of programming. Managers think it is good for programmers and programmers hate it!.
   Gerald Weinberg
----
Let us change our traditional attitude to the construction of programs. Instead of imagining that our main task is to instruct a computer what to to, let us concentrate rather on explaining to human beings what we want a computer to do.
   Donald Knuth
----
Good code is its own best documentation. As you're about to add a comment, ask yourself, �How can I improve the code so that this comment isn't needed?' Improve the code and then document it to make it even clearer.
   Steve McConnell
----
It's OK to figure out murder mysteries, but you shouldn't need to figure out code. You should be able to read it.
   Steve McConnell 
----
It's better to wait for a productive programmer to become available than it is to wait for the first available programmer to become productive.
   Steve McConnell
----
An organization that treats its programmers as morons will soon have programmers that are willing and able to act like morons only.
   Bjarne Stroustrup
----
Design and programming are human activities; forget that and all is lost.
   Bjarne Stroustrup
----
Before software can be reusable it first has to be usable.
   Ralph Johnson
----
If you think your management doesn't know what it's doing or that your organisation turns out low-quality software crap that embarrasses you, then leave.
   Edward Yourdon, Rise and Resurrection of the American Programmer
----
Real programmers can write assembly code in any language.
   Larry Wall 
----
Up to a point, it is better to just let the snags [bugs] be there than to spend such time in design that there are none.
   Alan M. Turing
----
The price of reliability is the pursuit of the utmost simplicity. It is a price which the very rich may find hard to pay.
   Charles Antony Richard Hoare (C.A.R. Hoare)
----
There are two ways of constructing a software design: One way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult.
   Charles Antony Richard Hoare (C.A.R. Hoare)
----
You cannot teach beginners top-down programming, because they don't know which end is up.
   Charles Antony Richard Hoare (C.A.R. Hoare)
----
Inside every large program, there is a small program trying to get out.
   Charles Antony Richard Hoare (C.A.R. Hoare)
----
The key to performance is elegance, not battalions of special cases.
   Jon Bentley and Doug McIlroy
----
Why do we never have time to do it right, but always have time to do it over?
----
The goal of Computer Science is to build something that will last at least until we've finished building it
----
Better train people and risk they leave - than do nothing and risk they stay
----
Optimism is an occupational hazard of programming: feedback is the treament
   Kent Beck
----
Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.
   Frederick P. Brooks
----
When to use iterative development? You should use iterative development only on projects that you want to succeed.
   Martin Fowler, in "UML Distilled"
----
Simple things should be simple, complex things should be possible.
   The Wiki Way: Quick Collaboration on the Web, Bo Leuf, Ward Cunningham
----
Simplicity is the soul of efficiency.
   Austin Freeman
----
... with proper design, the features come cheaply. This approach is arduous, but continues to succeed.
   Dennis Ritchie
----
A good way to stay flexible is to write less code
----
The best performance improvement is the transition from the nonworking state to the working state.
   John Ousterhout
----
More computing sins are committed in the name of efficiency (without necessarily achieving it) than for any other single reason - including blind stupidity.
   W.A. Wulf
----
The competent programmer is fully aware of the strictly limited size of his own skull; therefore he approaches the programming task in full humility, and among other things he avoids clever tricks like the plague.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
Correctness is clearly the prime quality. If a system does not do what it is supposed to do, then everything else about it matters little.
   Bertrand Meyer
----
One principle problem of educating software engineers is that they will not use a new method until they believe it works and, more importantly, that they will not believe the method will work until they see it for themselves.
   Humphrey, W.S., "The Personal Software Process"
----
Debugging is twice as hard as writing the code in the first place. Therefore, if you write the code as cleverly as possible, you are, by definition, not smart enough to debug it.
   Brian W. Kernighan
----
Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler.
   Albert Einstein
----
Increasingly, people seem to misinterpret complexity as sophistication, which is baffling --- the incomprehensible should cause suspicion rather than admiration. 
   Niklaus Wirth
----
If you cannot grok the overall structure of a program while taking a shower, you are not ready to code it.
   Richard Pattis
----
You can't have great software without a great team, and most software teams behave like dysfunctional families.
   Jim McCarthy
----
The perfect project plan is possible if one first documents a list of all the unknowns.
   Bill Langley
----
If something is worth doing once, it's worth building a tool to do it
----
Always code as if the person who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live
----
... programming requires more concentration than other activities. It's the reason programmers get upset about 'quick interruptions' - such interruptions are tantamount to asking a juggler to keep three balls in the air and hold your groceries at the same time."
   Steve McConnell, Code Complete
----
When debugging, novices insert corrective code; experts remove defective code.
   Richard Pattis
----
Every big computing disaster has come from taking too many ideas and putting them in one place.
   Gordon Bell
----
Conceptual integrity is the most important consideration in system design.
   Fred Brooks, "The Mythical Man-Month"
----
Experience doesn't necessarily teach anything.
   Gerald M. Weinberg, "Understanding the Professional Programmer"
----
No matter what the problem is, it's always a people problem.
   Gerald M. Weinberg
----
Hiring people to write code to sell is not the same as hiring people to design and build durable, usable, dependable software.
   Larry Constantine
----
The wisdom of the wise and the experience of the ages are perpetuated in quotations.
   Benjamin Disraeli 
----
We try to solve the problem by rushing through the design process so that enough time is left at the end of the project to uncover the errors that were made because we rushed through the design process.
   Glenford Myers
----
Programs should be written and polished until they acquire publication quality
   Niklaus Wirth
----
Time pressure gradually corrupts an engineer's standard of quality and perfection. It has a detrimental effect on people as well as products.
   Niklaus Wirth
----
Good engineering is characterized by gradual, stepwise refinement of products that yields increased performance under given constraints and with given resources.
   Niklaus Wirth
----
Software expands to fill the available memory.
   Parkinson
----
Software is getting slower more rapidly than hardware becomes faster.
   Reiser
----
My goal is to make the computer invisible.
   Stu Galley, from Infocom's Implementer's Creed
----
Always honor the system color settings, that is, the colors that the user chose in the control panel. Users have deliberately chosen those colors to give their computer the color scheme they like. Also, many of your vision-impaired users have deliberately set up schemes that they can see more clearly. (For that matter, always honor they system fonts so that your text is readable by people who prefer larger fonts.)
   Joel Spolsky
----
Trying to improve software quality by increasing the amount of testing is like trying to lose weight by weighing yourself more often. 
   Steve McConnell, Code Complete
----
Fifty years of programming language research, and we end up with C++ ???
   Richard A. O'Keefe
----
C++: Hard to learn and built to stay that way
----
C++ is like teenage sex:
       * It's on everyone's mind all the time.
       * Everyone talks about it all the time.
       * Everyone thinks everyone else is doing it.
       * Almost no one is really doing it.
       * The few who are doing it are:
            * doing it poorly.
            * sure it will be better next time.
            * not practicing it safely.
       * Everyone's bragging about their successes all the time, although very few have actually had any.
----
Writing in C or C++ is like running a chain saw with all the safety guards removed
   Bob Gray
----
Ever spend a little time reading comp.lang.c++ ? That's really the best place to learn about the number of C++ users looking for a better language.
   R. William Beckwith
----
The evolution of languages: FORTRAN is a non-typed language. C is a weakly typed language. Ada is a strongly typed language. C++ is a strongly hyped language
   Ron Sercely
----
C(++) is a write-only, high-level assembler language.
   Stefan Van Baelen
----
C++ has it's place in the history of programming languages.
Just as Caligula has his place in the history of the Roman Empire ?
   Robert Firth
----
C++ : Where friends have access to your private members.
   Gavin Russell Baker
----
C++ would make a decent teaching language if we could teach the ++ part without the C part.
   Michael B. Feldman
----
The great thing about Object Oriented code is that it can make small, simple problems look like large, complex ones
----
In C++ it's harder to shoot yourself in the foot, but when you do, you blow off your whole leg.
   Bjarne Stroustrup
----
Top 5 reasons to buy a crappy C++ book:
 5 -- You won't read it anyway 
 4 -- It comes out of your company's wallet, not yours
 3 -- It's the only language left that doesn't try to be "write once, run on any toaster oven"
 2 -- You still can't figure out how pointers work
 1 -- It's still less crappy than the writing on Slashdot
   Amsterdam Vallon, http://books.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=52893&cid=5241935
----
When your hammer is C++, everything begins to look like a thumb.
   Steve Haflich in alt.lang.design, December 1994
----
One of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs 
   Robert Firth
----
I have stopped reading Stephen King novels. Now I just read C code instead. 
   Richard O'Keefe
----
C++ is an atrocity, the bletcherous scab of the computing world, responsible for more buffer overflows, more security breaches, more blue screens of death, more mysterious failures than any other computer language in the history of the planet Earth. 
   Eric Lee Green
----
Arguing that Java is better than C++ is like arguing that grasshoppers taste better than tree bark. 
   Thant Tessman
----
If C++ has taught me one thing, it's this: Just because the system is consistent doesn't mean it's not the work of Satan. 
   Andrew Plotkin
----
Being really good at C++ is like being really good at using rocks to sharpen sticks. 
   Thant Tessman
----
If you think C++ is not overly complicated, just what is a protected abstract virtual base pure virtual private destructor and when was the last time you needed one? 
   Tom Cargill
----
In My Egotistical Opinion, most people's C programs should be indented six feet downward and covered with dirt. 
   Blair P. Houghton
----
A system composed of 100,000 lines of C++ is not be sneezed at, but we don't have that much trouble developing 100,000 lines of COBOL today. The real test of OOP will come when systems of 1 to 10 million lines of code are developed. 
   Ed Yourdon
----
C has all the expressive power of two dixie cups and a string. 
   Jamie Zawinski
----
Within C++, there is a much smaller and cleaner language struggling to get out. 
   Bjarne Stroustrup
----
I invented the term Object-Oriented, and I can tell you I did not have C++ in mind. 
   Alan Kay
----
There are only two things wrong with C++: The initial concept and the implementation. 
   Bertrand Meyer
----
C++ will do for C what Algol-68 did for Algol. 
   David L Jones
----
C is often described, with a mixture of fondness and disdain varying according to the speaker, as "a language that combines all the elegance and power of assembly language with all the readability and maintainability of assembly language." 
   MIT Jargon Dictionary
----
C++ is the only current language making COBOL look good. 
   Bertrand Meyer
----
PL/I and Ada started out with all the bloat, were very daunting languages, and got bad reputations (deservedly). C++ has shown that if you slowly bloat up a language over a period of years, people don't seem to mind as much. 
   James Hague
----
Java is, in many ways, C++--. 
   Michael Feldman
----
You can't prove anything about a program written in C or FORTRAN. It's really just Peek and Poke with some syntactic sugar. 
   Bill Joy
----
C is quirky, flawed and an enormous success. 
   Dennis Ritchie
----
Eiffel borrows quite heavily from some earlier programming languages and I am sure that if we had found a good programming construct in C we would have used it as well. 
   Bertrand Meyer
----
A C program is like a fast dance on a newly waxed dance floor by people carrying razors. 
   Waldi Ravens
----
All C programs do the same thing: look at a character and do nothing with it. 
   Peter Weinberger
----
Whenever the C++ language designers had two competing ideas as to how they should solve some problem, they said, "OK, we'll do them both". So the language is too baroque for my taste. 
   Donald E Knuth
----
The last good thing written in C++ was the Pachelbel Canon. 
   Jerry Olson
----
Other advanced languages, such as assembler and C, were not terribly complex in themselves, but the environments in which applications were developed were downright weird, with mines scattered about everywhere, ready to blow the inattentive programmer out of the water. 
   Bruce Tognazzini
----
Going from programming in Pascal to programming in C, is like learning to write in Morse code. 
   J P Candusso
----
To me C++ seems to be a language that has sacrificed orthogonality and elegance for random expediency. 
   Meilir Page-Jones
----
Any sufficiently complicated C or Fortran program contains an ad hoc informally-specified bug-ridden slow implementation of half of Common Lisp. 
   Philip Greenspun
----
C++ is history repeated as tragedy. Java is history repeated as farce. 
   Scott McKay
----
Unix and C are the ultimate computer viruses. 
   Richard P Gabriel
----
It has been discovered that C++ provides a remarkable facility for concealing the trival details of a program -- such as where its bugs are. 
   David Keppel
----
I view the landslide of C use in education as something of a calamity. 
   Nicklaus Wirth
----
C++ is like jamming a helicopter inside a Miata and expecting some sort of improvement. 
   Drew Olbrich
----
Pointers are like jumps, leading wildly from one part of the data structure to another. Their introduction into high-level languages has been a step backwards from which we may never recover. 
   Tony Hoare
----
C++: Simula in wolf's clothing. 
   Bjarne Stroustrup
----
The belief is still widespread in the commputing community that C and its derivatives are programming languages -- languages intended for people to write programs in. This is a regrettable misunderstanding. 
   Bertrand Meyer
----
From a practical viewpoint, it's easy to see that C will always be with us, taking a place beside Fortran and Cobol as the right tool for certain jobs. 
   Larry O'Brien
----
I consider C++ the most significant technical hazard to the survival of your project and do so without apologies. 
   Alistair Cockburn
----
--> spx2 has joined #soc-help
<spx2> I want to FIGHT FOR PERL IN GSOC !
<spx2> I feel the power of metal in my veins
<spx2> perl is flowing in my blood !
<spx2> What perl Armies can I join this YEAR ?
<ambs> spx2: a lot :)
<spx2> ambs: Hail BRETHREN !
<spx2> where are the armies ???
<spx2> I want to ENGAGE and start preparing my weapons !
<spx2> ambs: what projects are this year ?
<ambs> spx2: ideas at
http://www.perlfoundation.org/perl5/index.cgi?gsoc2008_projects
<spx2> I will fight this year in the PERL battle !
<rindolf> spx2: Python is for the WEAK and TIMID!
<spx2> rindolf: TOTALLY !
* spx2 examines the war grounds
   Seen on hackers il, 12/04/2008
----
<edeca> Hrm. More infernal questions, mainly because I am trying to
make my perl prettier and contain less nasty if's. I have
$foo and $bar which are obtained from split(/ /, 'kitten
loving'). But I don't want undef if the split fails, I'd
rather '' for $bar or both. What's the nicest way to do
that?
<Khisanth> ($foo, $bar) = map { $_ // "" } split / /, $str; # 5.10
version :)
<edeca> Noo 5.10! :)
<Khisanth> ($foo, $bar) = map { defined $_ ? $_ : "" } split / /,
$str; # probably some other shorter ways too
<rindolf> edeca: [bad idea] you can also try using the
conditional->inheritance refactoring.
<rindolf> :-)
* Khisanth pours boiling coffee on rindolf
* <rindolf> Khisanth: I hate coffee, but I guess I deserved it.
* <rindolf> That was a joke, of course.
* <Khisanth> you weren't really supposed to like having boiling anything
* poured on you but I guess you are into the kinkier stuff
*
* -- Freenode's #perl
   Seen on hackers il, 12/04/2008
----
<rbastic> Juerd: eh in today's world of heavy JS on the clientside, i
think it makes a little more sense to use the same lang.
everywhere
<Juerd> rbastic: JS on the client side is because often it's the
only option the universe provides.
<rbastic> Juerd: from a business perspective, you reduce the
complexity and potential difficulties in finding new hires
with the same skillset
<rindolf> rbastic: have you heard of RJS?
<Juerd> rbastic: On the server side, however, you have great
freedom.
<rbastic> rindolf: no, what's that?
<Caelum> larry wants perl6 to run on javascript :)
<rindolf> rbastic: "One Language; and One Sayings".
<Juerd> rbastic: Exactly. I would never hire a server side
programmer who knows *only* Javascript, and is too stupid to
learn whatever we're using on the server side.
<rindolf> rbastic: my translation to a sentence from the Tower of
Babel myth.
<rbastic> Juerd: i'll agree with that also. any real programmer knows
or has at least coded in half a dozen languages before
<Juerd> From a business perspective, you should avoid crap coders at
all cost.
<Juerd> Knows *or* has coded... Hmmm...!
<rindolf> rbastic: though according to what most scholars believe it
was not about using one language but rather thinking the
same.
<Juerd> I hope they haven't coded in half a dozen languages without
knowing them.
<Juerd> That'd be scary.
<zshzn> Reality is scary, Juerd
<talexb> Hmm, BASIC, FORTRAN, COBOL, assembler, C, more assembler, C,
Pascal ... Perl!
-- The Grand Unified Programming Language
   Seen on hackers il, 12/04/2008
----
<rindolf> rbastic: now I'm working with C++.
<rindolf> rbastic: I found out that my project compiles really
quickly.
<rindolf> rbastic: under 5 or 10 minutes on a P4-2.4GHz with 1 GB of
RAM.
<rindolf> rbastic: maybe KDE is making g++ look bad.
<rbastic> rindolf: yeah, i'm not a big KDE fan
<rindolf> rbastic: actually I'm using KDE-3.5.8 here.
<rindolf> rbastic: I was talking about the compilation speed of KDE
apps and KDE itself.
<rindolf> rbastic: possibly because each file has half-a-gazillion
headers.
<rindolf> My C++ code is a server one, so we don't have too many deps.
<rbastic> yeah, isn't there a way to cache header files? ie. in their
"compiled" form?
<rbastic> or is that something I'm remembering from some other
programming language that purported to build on top of C?
<rindolf> rbastic: MSVC has that.
<rbastic> ahh, nods
<rindolf> rbastic: no, Visual C++ has precompiled headers.
<rindolf> rbastic: I remember that I kept deleting them.
<rbastic> yeah, couldn't remember
<rbastic> lol
<rindolf> Pascal compiles very quickly.
<rindolf> That's one of the things I enjoyed in Delphi.
<rbastic> ugh, the app i'm been maintaining in Java was originally a
fat client/server desktop app, written in Delphi
<rindolf> rbastic: ah.
<rbastic> i remember booting up the old app for the first time, and
being amazed at how slow it was
<rbastic> eventually, i had to duplicate a feature in the Java code
and i wasn't sure how it was implemented before
<rindolf> rbastic: you mean the Java app is faster? :S
<rbastic> so being as i had no Delphi experience, and the newer Delphi
environments made NO sense to me at all, i just opened up
the SQL Server query analyzer
<rbastic> rindolf: yes, but only b/c the Delphi programmer was an
idiot, issuing queries over and over again needlessly
<rbastic> rindolf: if you could've seen the MSSQL Performance Analyzer
or whatever, it was basically just.. Query1, Query2, Query3,
Query1, Query2, Query3, repeat.
<rbastic> it was probably the worst ive ever seen in my life.. belongs
on www.thedailywtf.com

-- Can I haz a fast compiler on Freenode's #perl
   Seen on hackers il, 12/04/2008
----
<rindolf> scrottie: hi.
<scrottie> hi rindolf!
<rindolf> scrottie: are you the scrottie from use.perl.org?
<scrottie> yeah.
<rindolf> scrottie: ah, nice to meet you.
<rindolf> Well, chat with you on IRC at least.
* scrottie cowers from the swinging fist probably coming his
* way
* <rindolf> scrottie: I'm "Shlomi%20Fish"
* <scrottie> oh, heh, thanks
* <rindolf> It's a curse.
* <scrottie> hmm. i vaguely remember interesting stuff from you but
* can't honestly place what.
* <scrottie> I know I've seen you around here before too.
* <rindolf> Yeah, my use.perl.org blog is mostly technical and
* perl-related.
* <scrottie> I post on use.perl.org entirely too much.
* <rindolf> So it may be a bit boring.
* <rindolf> Sometimes it's a bit philosophical.
* <rindolf> scrottie: yes.
* <scrottie> heh. and mine is offensively off-topic.
* <rindolf> scrottie: I have other blogs.
* <scrottie> I've posted to livejournal twice!
*
* -- I think too much - therefore I blog too much on Freenode's #perl
   Seen on hackers il, 12/04/2008
----
<rindolf> Can we add styles like <b>, <i>, etc.?
<rindolf> Or colours?
<rindolf> Or blink?
<rindolf> Or images?
<rindolf> Or flash applets?
<scrottie> <banner>!
<alanhaggai> rindolf: No I think. Google's Web Application does not
allow them. It is just a <textarea>.

-- How intrusive do you want your text to be?
-- Freenode's #perl
   Seen on hackers il, 12/04/2008
----
<rindolf> A lot of ise's [in Aspell's British Spelling checker] are false
positivies.
<rindolf> positives even.
<rindolf> People who say $minor_spelling_correction even, are lam.
<rindolf> lame even.
<rindolf> I never get tired of these self-referential jokes.

-- Freenode's #perl
   Seen on hackers il, 12/04/2008
----
When finlly you understand life, you finish your own

quando compreenderes a vida, acabas com a tua
   Ido Kanner
----
The first 90 percent of the code accounts for the first 90 percent of the development time... The remaining 10 percent of the code accounts for the other 90 percent of the development time.
   Tom Cargill
----
Most of you are familiar with the virtues of a programmer. There are three, of course: laziness, impatience, and hubris.
   Larry Wall
----
Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring aircraft building progress by weight.
   Bill Gates
----
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is.
   Jan L. A. van de Snepscheut
----
The hardest part of design... is keeping features out.
   Donald Norman 
----
If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
Software and cathedrals are much the same - first we build them, then we pray.
----
The software isn't finished until the last user is dead.
----
Programming is 10% science, 20% ingenuity, and 70% getting the ingenuity to work with the science.
----
All programmers are playwrights and all computers are lousy actors
----
Bad code isn't bad, its just misunderstood.
----
It is easier to measure something than to understand what you have measured.
----
The sooner you get behind in your work, the more time you have to catch up.
----
When a programming language is created that allows programmers to program in simple English, it will be discovered that programmers cannot speak English.
----
Benchmarks don't lie, but liars do benchmarks
----
Your code does not start at the compiler nor does it stop at the JVM
----
One lesson that most developers don't learn is to debug outside the debugger. As an engineer there are times when you need to troubleshot, problem solve, and debug not just your software from the comforts of your favorite IDE but the whole software stack, network, hardware, user's environment, and even the user himself.
----
You can unit test and statically analysis software, but you can't probe your users.
----
Every problem, issue, and bug experienced by the end user directly and indirectly with your software eventually needs to be implicitly and explicitly dealt with by your software development team.
----
I wish development teams spend more time streamlining their process rather than prematurely optimizing their code
----
It is OK to have software with bugs, bugs can be fixed. It is not OK to have software with excuses!
----
Learn, plan, design, code, integrate, build, release, rinse, and repeat.
----
Management has a way of over emphasizing the blatantly obvious
----
I've discovered that Windows security is an oxymoron!
----
I know that techies, myself included, are always bragging about how their code is poetry but I have never meet a poet laureate in a development team.
----
Remixing and mashing up Google Maps and Flickr is like the 'Hello, World' first program of Web 2.0 mashups.
----
Open Source code equals community.
----
As a rule of thumb, I never cache, pool, or use as singleton mutable objects
----
Bugs by nature are out of the box, as a developer, you need to expand the box.
----
WWGD: What would Google do?
----
At some companies, the term Spec stands for Speculation
----
I went to school to learn how to program software applications, which inevitably have bug defects. There was no course at my university on testing, debugging, profiling, or optimization. These things you have to learn on your own, usually in a tight deadline.
----
To most Java developers, Ruby/Rails is like a mistress. Ruby/Rails is young, new, and exciting; but eventually we go back to old faithful, dependable, and employable Java with some new tricks and idioms and we are the better programmer for it.
----
You might as well hire your customers and pay them 50K/year because they are your new QA. 
----
There is a saying, those who can, do; those who can't, teach. It can be said that in software engineering, those who can, code, those who can't, manage. 
----
The greatest thing about Ruby on Rails is neither Ruby nor Rails, the best aspect of Rails is that it questioned the 'best practices' (and worst nightmares) of the current state of web development with its philosophy of Convention over Configuration and Don't Repeat Yourself principle.
----
There is more than one way to do it, but do it how ever more than one developer can understand it.
----
Design a software solution for the end user, not for a fellow developer, or worse yet your database.
----
If the end user can't use your software, that's a bug.
----
You may consider your code as art but no one is going to hang your code in the Louvre
----
Use the quicksort approach to problem solving.
----
Having code working on the developer's machine is not a valid solution, software needs to work at the client's site too!
----
The anti-FUD: Fighting FUD with more FUD
----
Unfortunately, there is no performance enhancement supplement you can take to make you a better software engineer.
----
Even the best process and best technology fail, if the people fail. People often fail, when management fails to provide the right incentive, motivation, and passion-oriented environment that people like to be a part of.
----
Failure is a form of experience.
----
Everyone has their own way of learning and should be granted the opportunity to digest information as they know how to learn best, whether it is through documentation, screen shots, class diagrams, use cases, prototyping, refactoring, and even rewriting.
----
It is commonly said that you don't know what you have until you lose it. With software you usually don't know what the user will want until you ship.
----
As a developer, it is not like we get royalties on our work, so what do I care that 5% of my software is pirated, those that do pay for it make up the perceived loss.
----
Software companies should listen to their customers, even those that use their software a few times, instead of their lawyers, that most likely never have used their software.
----
Every piece of code has bugs, but not every bug needs to be in the code.
----
Testing is not a one time, one shot deal. Testing is like marriage, you have to work at it every day for it to be successful.
----
I don't hire software engineers to code. The primary function of an software engineer is to learn and analysis and decode a problem mentally so that then can later code their language of choice.
----
Software engineering is nothing like civil engineering. Software engineers listen too much to their end users. If civil engineers listen to their users as much we would software developers do most buildings would end up like the Winchester Mystery House with a freeway offramp coming right up to their driveway.
----
This feature might have been due yesterday, but telling me a day after it is due is not a schedule!
----
A business laptop given to a knowledge worker should be treated such as a marine treats his issued assault weapon, with the utmost respect and intimate knowledge of its inner workings. A business laptop is usually loaded with sensitive and proprietary information, and it is just pathetic when someone can't change the display on their own machine to use a projector.
----
If you don't understand Open Source licensing, don't start an Open Source project. Keep your code!
----
The real value of code does not lie in the source code, the value lies in the knowledge and expertize of the community.
----
For every one line of code in jQuery, there is at least one plugin written by a third party.
----
There cannot be a killer app without a killer community.
----
The easier it is to reproduce a bug, the easier it is to fix.
----
You can't have five top priorities at once.
----
As a software engineer, it is better to think of yourself as ninja programmer rather than a mercenary coder.
----
Its not a team meeting if only one person talks, that's more like a presentation.
----
The anatomy of a Google application is sheer simplicity, great user interface and experience, accessible data API, and instant scalability.
----
A properly written application might scale to millions of users, a top developer at most can scale to a few tasks a day.
----
A programming language shouldn't change it's accent in every major point release. This is also true about libraries, frameworks, and APIs.
----
Adhering to a process is like a freeway, when everyone is going at sustainable developer velocity, the process is flowing. But it only takes one developer to stall in the middle of the process to back up and side rail the whole team, as one stalled car in the freeway backs up everybody.
----
In the end, all software end up the same, just a bunch of boxes wired together.
----
Software development teams are like Tolstoy's Family, there is a one way to produce happy software, but unlimited number of ways to be down trodden frustrated and dysfunctional software.
----
Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring a horror flick by the number of victims, for either case it's usually a gorefest.
----
As software developers, half the stuff we do is hacks for the other half.
----
Don't let the spec define and technology limit user experience.
----
Software engineering wants to be a creative, like writing, and disciplined, like engineering, but it is often neither.
----
Remember that process is there to help people, not people to push along the process.
----
I've heard of greenfield app, now brownfield app. A brownfield that contaminated by poor practices but has the potential to be revived. What is next? Cloverfield?
----
The only thing I hate most other writing unit tests, is refactoring, updating, and maintaining code that do not have unit tests.
----
In most applications you'll ever develop, optimization and scalability are just 10% of the job. Focus on the 90%, which is getting the thing to work correctly.
----
Learning a new platform requires you learn a whole set of known issues and limitations, and to discover new ones in the process.
----
Anyone eager to deploy a web application on a new framework is a masochist.
----
Backward compatibility is not just about code but also applies to usability. Backward compatible is about implies to user expectations.
----
Rails is not just opinionated software, it is fascist software.
----
The Java version of a Hello World example Web Services using Axis 2 is just about ten lines of code, 55 jars, and 20MB war file. Fail.
----
Everyone has ideas, ideas are a cheap commodity. Visualizing an idea for five minutes is not the same thing as working years to actualize it.
----
Not every cloud computing initiative has a silver lining.
----
Big O notation is used to describe computational complexity, I use Big H notation to describe the level of a hack. H(n!) describes a MacGyver level hack. Similarly there is a Big F notation for level of FAIL.
----
In programming there is force of nature or grace of God, just hacks of probability and redundancy.
----
Saying that it will be fixed in the a future release does not fix the problem. 
----
When hiring, I'll take someone that wants to do it over someone that has done it once and is willing to do it again until something better comes along. That is the difference between passion and bandwagon, career man and salary man, patriot and mercenary, love and prostitution.
----
If all things are equal and fully qualify, hire those that want to be there, contract those that just need to be somewhere.
----
It doesn't matter how smart you are, or how smart I think I am. Regression testing will prove us wrong.
----
I have heard that some teams follow the Software Development Life Cycle. But I have seen teams follow the Software Development Death March.
----
Recruit. Retain. Retrain.
----
Some entrepreneurs idea of a business model is how much they can charge their customers not what they can do for them.
----
Some entrepreneurs are looking for a sexy business model, I'll stick to my hard working homely business model.
----
Service provider: Good, Fast, Cheap. Pick two. Employee: passionate, knowledgeable, productive. Pick one.
----
When people are too busy to learn, they are not being productive.
----
Which is best, an extraordinary idea executed ordinary and ordinary idea executed extraordinary?
----
Learn to manage your manager.
----
You could only be excellent, you can't be half excellent
----
You can only stand in front of a client only if you know what you say you know.
----
You can't charge for testing, but it saves you time and money, it is an investment in quality and sanity. 
----
The problem with frameworks is that you most often have a very narrow frame to work with.
----
Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. 
   George Burns
----
If you are spending more time writing code than thinking about what code you should write - you are doing something wrong. Very wrong. Or it's something trivial enough to not be of much importance. Or it's Java.
   Developing at the speed of thought
----
Those who do not understand Unix are condemned to reinvent it, poorly.
   Henry Spencer
----
Evolution always seems to win out over revolution when it comes to technology.
   Rick Hightower
----
C++ is popular because it is like C. Java is popular because it is like C++ and C. C# is popular because it is like Java. See a pattern
   Rick Hightower
----
Process makes us strong. ... Process allows us to draw pretty charts and graphs on endless presentations.
   Crystal Methodology
----
I really think types are the fundamental currency of Java, not strings.
   Crazy Bob Lee
----
Don't be a corporate programmer. They demand all of your creativity and trust none of your judgment.
   Zed Shaw
----
I really think a major problem in our industry is that programmers turn their brains off when someone with a Ph.D. or who's written a book makes a statement.
   Zed Shaw
----
Don't just fucking blog, but write some software and give it away. While the average person can only read a human language, the people you really need to hit with your message as a programmer are other coders.
   Zed Shaw
----
The programmer who programs least, programs best.
   Justin Etheredge
----
Well, it has been said over and over again that the tremendous cost of programming is caused by the fact that it is done by cheap labor, which makes it very expensive, and secondly that people rush into coding.
   Dr. Edsger W. Dijkstra
----
The biggest issue on software teams is making sure everyone understands what everyone else is doing.
   Martin Fowler
----
You should be 95% certain that a candidate would be a great hire before they ever set foot in an interview room.
   Jeff Atwood
----
What software developers do best is learn.
   Jeff Atwood
----
Saying you understand SQL is the best way of getting me to ask you to design a table to describe a hierarchical structure or give a talk on concurrency.
   Clinton Pierce
----
For instance, ideas at Google do not burst forth from the heads of geniuses and then find their way unimpeded to huge audiences of receptive users. Rather ideas emerge, are torn to shreds, reformulated, torn to shreds, prototyped, torn to shreds, launched to internal users, torn to shreds, rebuilt and relaunched, torn to shreds, refined some more, torn to shreds, put back together one last time, torn to shreds by SREs, tweaked again in a seemingly-endless frenzy of last minute work, and launched...whereupon they are torn to shreds by bloggers, journalists, and competitors. The magic of Google is that tearing to shreds...
   Kevin Scott
----
why is it that the software development industry, which has all these awesome ways of sharing what has previously been done, constantly finds itself reinventing the wheel?
   Robert Fischer
----
Building Facebook Applications is not a business plan, unless you are a web developer who does freelance Facebook application development. It is the McDonalds equivalent of a business plan. Quick, cheap, greasy and ultimately unfulfilling.
   Jevon MacDonald
----
Software is error-ridden in part because of its growing complexity. The size of software products is no longer measured in thousands of lines of code, but in millions. Software developers already spend approximately 80 percent of development costs on identifying and correcting defects, and yet few products of any type other than software are shipped with such high levels of errors.
   National Institute of Standards and Technology
----
While machines have changed enormously, the business of software development has been rather static. We still spend most of our time working n requirements and specification, the low-tech part of our work.
   Tom DeMarco and Timothy Lister
----
Productivity within the software industry has improved by three to five percent a year, only marginally better than the steel or automobile industry.
   Tom DeMarco and Timothy Lister
----
Count on the best people outperforming the worst by about 10:1. Count on the best performer being about 2.5 times better than the median performer.
   Tom DeMarco and Timothy Lister
----
People who had ten years of experience did not outperform those with two years of experience.
   Tom DeMarco and Timothy Lister
----
There was a very weak relationship between salary and performance.
   Tom DeMarco and Timothy Lister
----
The business we're in is more sociological then technological, more dependent on workers' abilities to communicate with each other than their abilities to communicate with machines.
   Tom DeMarco and Timothy Lister
----
Having a resume begs for you to go into that big machine that looks for relevant keywords, and begs for you to get a job as a cog in a giant machine.
   seth Godin
----
The flip side of code ownership is code responsibility.
   Jeff Atwood
----
The First Rule of Programming: It's Always Your Fault
  Jeff Atwood
----
Stop being a software factory, write a software factory.
  Richard Campbell
----
Programming books sold by weight, not by volume.
  Jeff Atwood
----
People who talk big about scalability don't need to worry about it
  Ted Dziuba
----
Dude, your app isn't having scalability problems because of the architecture. It's having scalability problems because you coded a ton of N^2 loops into it and you're too self-important to get peer reviews on your commits.
  Ted Dziuba
----
If you haven't discussed capacity planning, you can't discuss scalability
  Ted Dziuba
----
Unless you know what you need to scale to, you can't even begin to talk about scalability.
  Ted Dziuba
----
Choosing technology don't mean shit if you don't know how to use it
  Ted Dziuba
----
Buying new software should require product research, multiple demos, on-site testing, reference checking, and planning
  Gene Marks
----
The bottleneck in writing code isn't in the writing of the code, it's in understanding and conceptualising what needs to be done.
  Shane Legg
----
I use a variety of languages, tools, and OSes, and my choice of which to use are all geared around a single end goal: not to promote my own social or political agenda, but to make my customer happy.
  Ted Neward
----
For all those who don't get it, languages don't scale, architectures do.
  Blaine Cook
----
Faster means cheaper, it doesn't mean more scalable.
  Blaine Cook
----
We are not solving problems, we are approximating solutions.
  Sean Parent
----
All problems of scale become a network problem.
  Sean Parent
----
Programming in of itself is just an activity, like brushing your teeth. In the same way brushing your teeth doesn't make you a dentist, writing code doesn't make you an engineer, artist, or scientist.
   Christopher Diggins
----
If you want to create a memorable company, you have to fill your company with memorable people.
   Bill Taylor
----
From what I've seen of it, PHP isn't so much a language as a random collection of arbitrary stuff, a virtual explosion at the keyword and function factory.
   Jeff Atwood
----
All the PHP code I've seen in that experience has been messy, unmaintainable crap. Spaghetti SQL wrapped in spaghetti PHP wrapped in spaghetti HTML, replicated in slightly-varying form in dozens of places.
   Tim Bray
----
One day, you may need a super-scalable architecture to keep up with the traffic. But before that, it's more important to focus on building a great software that makes people happy.
   Jerry Luk
----
The Golden Rule of Data Manipulation: It is always easier and more flexible to combine data elements rather than to break them apart.
   Jeff Smith
----
Is the community around a product more important than the product itself?
   Jeff Atwood
----
Most programming languages contain good parts and bad parts. I discovered that I could be better programmer by using only the good parts and avoiding the bad parts.
   Douglas Crockford
----
It turns out that strong typing does not eliminate the need for careful testing. And I have found in my work that the sorts of errors that strong type checking finds are no the errors I worry about.
   Douglas Crockford
----
Obsolete comments are worse than no comments.
   Douglas Crockford
----
Generally, the craft of programming is the factoring of a set of requirements into a set of functions and data structures.
   Douglas Crockford
----
Software is usually expected to be modified over the course of its productive life. The process of converting one correct program into a different correct program is extremely challenging.
   Douglas Crockford
----
It turns out that style matters in programming for the same reason that it matters in writing. It makes for better reading.
   Douglas Crockford
----
Features have a specification cost, a design cost, and a development cost. There is a testing cost and a reliability cost. ... Features have a documentation cost. Every feature adds pages to the manual increasing training costs.
   Douglas Crockford
----
Features that offer value to a minority of users impose a cost on all users.
   Douglas Crockford
----
The worst interview question is the question taken out of context.
   Sasha Goldshtein
----
Efficiency and quality are of equal importance!! Both come from experience, not from study. Study as you go, don't assume that you're ready for the real world because you studied first.
   Jon Davis
----
The [iPhone] SDK has more restrictions than Guantanamo.
   Matt Buchanan
----
Closures are the new web framework, everybody wants one.
   Dick Wall
----
I admit it, programming pleases me sexually.
   Daniel Fischer
----
It's as easy to hire great Ruby programmers as it is to hire great Java programmers or great programmers for any given popular language. The problem is, it's not easy to hire great programmers in any language.
   Jay Fields
----
50% of all people doing business software development should find a new profession.
   Jay Fields
----
Creativity is your most important asset in development, and the first one to go with sleep deprivation.
   Daniel Haran
----
The art of programming is finding patterns where others see only chaos.
   Eric Filson
----
The chief cause of problems is solutions.
   Eric Severeid
----
The user is NOT a lower life form
   Ken Becker
----
True interactivity is not about clicking on icons or downloading files, it's about encouraging communication.
   Ed Scholssberg
----
A picture is worth a thousand words. An interface is worth a thousand pictures.
   Ben Shneiderman
----
The joy of an early release lasts but a short time. The bitterness of an unusable system lasts for years.
   Anonymous Release Engineer
----
If we want users to like our software, we should design it to behave like a likeable person.
   Alan Cooper
----
Any darn fool can make something complex; it takes a genius to make something simple.
   Albert Einstein
----
Never use a warning when you mean undo.
   Aza Raskin
----
If you need the approval of the platform vendor to ship an app, then it isn't a platform.
   Dave Winer
----
Marketing has long known how to exploit fads and how to develop trends.
   Geoffrey Moore
----
As a buying group, visionaries are easy to sell but very hard to please. This is because they are buying a dream - which, to some degree, will alwasy be a dream.
   Geoffrey Moore
----
The biggest problem is typically overly ambitious expectations combined with undercapitalization.
   Geoffrey Moore
----
To enter the maintsteam market is an act of aggression. The companies who have already established relationships with your target customer will resent your intrusion and do everything they can to shut you out.
   Geoffrey Moore
----
The sooner you start to code, the longer the program will take.
   Roy Carlson
----
If the code and the comments disagree, then both are probably wrong.
   Norm Schryer
----
If you have too many special cases, you are doing it wrong.
   Craig Zerouni
----
Testing can show the presence of bugs, not their absence.
   Edsger W. Dijkstra
----
Each new user of a new system uncovers a new class of bugs.
   Brian Kernighan
----
The fastest algorithm can frequently be replaced by one that is almost as fast and much easier to understand.
   Douglas W. Jones
----
Whenever possible, steal code.
   Tom Duff
----
I would rather write programs to help me write programs than write programs.
   Dick Sites
----
Furious activity is no substitute for understanding.
   H.H. Williams
----
One person's constant is another person's variable.
   Susan Gerhart
----
One person's data is another person's program.
   Guy L. Steele, Jr.
----
The computer industry is the only industry that is more fashion-driven than women's fashion.
   Larry Ellison
----
When in doubt, use brute force.
   Ken Thompson, Bell Labs
----
Avoid arc-sine and arc-cosine functions---you can usually do better by applying a trig identity or computing a vector dot-product.
   Jim Conyngham, Arvin/Calspan Advanced Technology Center
----
Allocate four digits for the year part of a date: a new millennium is approaching.
   David Martin, Norristown, Pennsylvania
----
Avoid asymmetry.
   Andy Huber, Data General Corporation
----
If you can't write it down in English, you can't code it.
   Peter Halpern, Brooklyn, New York
----
Details count.
   Peter Weinberger, Bell Labs
----
Get your data structures correct first, and the rest of the program will write itself.
   David Jones, Assen, The Netherlands
----
A program designed for inputs from people is usually stressed beyond breaking point by computer-generated inputs.
   Dennis Ritchie, Bell Labs
----
Twenty percent of all input forms filled by people contain bad data.
   Vic Vyssotsky, Bell Labs
----
Eighty percent of all input forms ask questions they have no business asking.
   Mike Garey, Bell Labs
----
Don't make the user interface provide information that the system already knows.
   Rick Lemmons, Cardinal Data Systems
----
For 80% of all data sets, 95% of the information can be seen in a good graph.
   William S. Cleveland, Bell Labs
----
Do you really need to scale this now when you have two users per day ?!
   Ido Kanner seeing premature scaling for software
----
Premature scaling is a root for bad design
   Ido Kanner
----
Of all my programming bugs, 80% are syntax errors. Of the remaining 20%, 80% are trivial logical errors. Of the remaining 4%, 80% are pointer errors. And the remaining 0.8% are hard.
   Marc Donner, IBM Watson Research Center
----
It takes three times the effort to find and fix bugs in system test than when done by the developer. It takes ten times the effort to find and fix bugs in the field than when done in system test. Therefore, insist on unit tests by the developer.
   Larry Bernstein, Bell Communications Research
----
Don't debug standing up. It cuts your patience in half, and you need all you can muster.
   Dave Storer, Cedar Rapids, Iowa
----
Don't get suckered in by the comments---they can be terribly misleading. Debug only code.
   Dave Storer, Cedar Rapids, Iowa
----
If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
   Ronald Reagan, Santa Barbara, California
----
If we can't fix it, it ain't broke.
   Lieutenant Colonel Walt Weir, United States Army
----
The first step in fixing a broken program is getting it to fail repeatably.
   Tom Duff, Bell Labs
----
The First Rule of Program Optimization: don't do it.
The Second Rule of Program Optimization: Don't do it yet
   Michael Jackson, Michael Jackson Systems Ltd.
----
In non-I/O-bound programs, less than four percent of a program generally accounts for more than half of its running time.
   Don Knuth, Stanford University
----
Before optimizing, use a profiler to locate the "hot spots" of the program.
   Mike Morton, Boston, Massachusetts
----
When you turn an ordinary page of code into just a handful of instructions for speed, expand the comments to keep the number of source lines constant.
   Mike Morton, Boston, Massachusetts
----
Good code document itself, great code use good comments as part of it's documentation.
   Ido Kanner
----
If the programmer can simulate a construct faster than a compiler can implement the construct itself, then the compiler writer has blown it badly.
   Guy L. Steele, Jr., Tartan Laboratories
----
To speed up an I/O-bound program, begin by accounting for all I/O. Eliminate that which is unnecessary or redundant, and make the remaining as fast as possible.
   David Martin, Norristown, Pennsylvania
----
The fastest I/O is no I/O.
   Nils-Peter Nelson, Bell Labs
----
The cheapest, fastest and most reliable components of a computer system are those that aren't there.
   Gordon Bell, Encore Computer Corporation
----
Most assembly languages have a loop operation that does a compare and branch in a single machine instruction; although it was intended for loops, it can sometimes be used to do a general comparison very efficiently.
   Guy L. Steele, Jr., Tartan Laboratories
----
Making a wrong program worse is no sin.
   Bill McKeenan, Wang Institute
----
Electricity travels a foot in a nanosecond.
   Commodore Grace Murray Hopper, United States Navy
----
Don't include a sentence in documentation if its negation is obviously false.
   Bob Martin, AT&T Technologies
----
When explaining a command, or language feature, or hardware widget, first describe the problem it is designed to solve.
   David Martin, Norristown, Pennsylvania
----
A {specification, design, procedure, test plan} that will not fit on one page of 8.5-by-11 inch paper cannot be understood.
   Mark Ardis, Wang Institute
----
The job's not over until the paperwork's done.
----
The structure of a system reflects the structure of the organization that built it.
   Richard E. Fairley, Wang Institute
----
Don't keep doing what doesn't work.
----
The first 90% of the code accounts for the first 90% of the development time. The remaining 10% of the code accounts for the other 90% of the development time.
   Tom Cargill, Bell Labs
----
Less than 10% of the code has to do with the ostensible purpose of the system; the rest deals with input-output, data validation, data structure maintenance, and other housekeeping.
   Mary Shaw, Carnegie-Mellon University
----
Don't write a new program if one already does more or less what you want. And if you must write a program, use existing code to do as much of the work as possible.
   Richard Hill, Hewlett-Packard S.A., Geneva, Switzerland
----
Good customer relations double productivity.
   Larry Bernstein, Bell Communications Research
----
Translating a working program to a new language or system takes ten percent of the original development time or manpower or cost.
   Douglas W. Jones, University of Iowa
----
Don't use the computer to do things that can be efficiently done by hand.
   Richard Hill, Hewlett-Packard S.A., Geneva, Switzerland
----
Don't use hands to do things that can be efficiently done by the computer.
   Tom Duff, Bell Labs
----
Brooks's Law of Prototypes: Plan to throw one away, you will anyhow.
   Fred Brooks, University of North Carolina
----
If you plan to throw one away, you will throw away two.
   Craig Zerouni, Computer FX Ltd., London, England
----
Prototyping cuts the work to produce a system by 40%.
   Larry Bernstein, Bell Communications Research
----
Thompson's Rule for First-Time Telescope Makers: It is faster to make a four-inch mirror and then a six-inch mirror than to make a six-inch mirror.
   Bill McKeenan, Wang Institute
----
Always do the hard part first. If the hard part is impossible, why waste time on the easy part? Once the hard part is done, you're home free.

Always do the east part first. What you think at first is the easy part often turns out to be the hard part. Once the easy part is done, you can concentrate all your efforts on the hard part.
   Al Schapira, Bell Labs
----
Sure, 90% of all software is crap. That's because 90% of everything is crap.
   Mary Shaw, Carnegie-Mellon University
----
If you lie to the computer, it will get you.
   Peter Farrar, Germantown, Maryland
----
If a system doesn't have to be reliable, it can do anything else.
   H.H.Williams, Oakland, California
----
KISS: Keep it simple, stupid.
----
Eschew clever rules.
   Joe Condon, Bell Labs
----
I head a nation of a million presidents.
   Chaim Weizmann
----
Miracles sometimes occur, but one has to work terribly hard for them.
   Chaim Weizmann
----
Restlessness and discontent are the first necessities of progress.
   Thomas A. Edison
----
An idea is something that won't work unless you do.
   Thomas A. Edison
----
Anything that won't sell, I don't want to invent. Its sale is proof of utility, and utility is success.
   Thomas A. Edison
----
As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey.
   Thomas A. Edison
----
Be courageous. I have seen many depressions in business. Always America has emerged from these stronger and more prosperous. Be brave as your fathers before you. Have faith! Go forward!
   Thomas A. Edison
----
Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the Western Spiral arm of the Galaxy lies a small unregarded yellow sun. Orbiting this at a distance of roughly ninety-eight million miles is an utterly insignificant little blue-green planet whose ape-descended life forms are so amazingly primitive that they still think digital watches are a pretty neat idea.
   Douglas Adams
----
It is not the fall that kills you. It's the sudden stop at the end.
   Douglas Adams
----
A common mistake people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools
   Douglas Adams
----
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.
   Douglas Adams
----
Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
   Douglas Adams
----
He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.
   Douglas Adams
----
He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.
   Douglas Adams
----
Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.
   Douglas Adams
----
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer.
   Douglas Adams
----
Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too?
   Douglas Adams
----
Life is wasted on the living.
   Douglas Adams
----
The moment at which two people, approaching from opposite ends of a long passageway, recognize each other and immediately pretend they haven't. This is to avoid the ghastly embarrassment of having to continue recognizing each other the whole length of the corridor.
   Douglas Adams
----
There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
   Douglas Adams
----
To give real service you must add something which cannot be bought or measured with money, and that is sincerity and integrity.
   Douglas Adams
----
What to do if you find yourself stuck in a crack in the ground underneath a giant boulder you can't move, with no hope of rescue. Consider how lucky you are that life has been good to you so far. Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far, which given your current circumstances seems more likely, consider how lucky you are that it won't be troubling you much longer.
   Douglas Adams
----
All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.
   George Orwell, Animal Farm
----
All issues are political issues, and politics itself is a mass of lies, evasions, folly, hatred and schizophrenia.
   George Orwell
----
At any given moment, there is a sort of all pervading orthodoxy, a general tacit agreement not to discuss large and uncomfortable facts.
   George Orwell
----
If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.
   George Orwell
----
In a time of universal deceit - telling the truth is a revolutionary act
   George Orwell
----
Political or military commentators, like astrologers, can survive almost any mistake, because their more devoted followers do not look to them for an appraisal of the facts but for the stimulation of nationalistic loyalties.
   George Orwell, Notes on Nationalism
----
A dirty joke is a sort of mental rebellion.
   George Orwell
----
A liberal is a power worshipper without the power.
   George Orwell
----
A tragic situation exists precisely when virtue does not triumph but when it is still felt that man is nobler than the forces which destroy him.
   George Orwell
----
All people who have reached the point of becoming nations tend to despise foreigners, but there is not much doubt that the English-speaking races are the worst offenders. One can see this from the fact that as soon as they become fully aware of any foreign race they invent an insulting nickname for it.
   George Orwell
----
All writers are vain, selfish and lazy, and at the very bottom of their motives lies a mystery. Writing a book is a long, exhausting struggle, like a long bout of some painful illness. One would never undertake such a thing if one were not driven by some demon whom one can neither resist nor understand.
   George Orwell
----
As with the Christian religion, the worst advertisement for socialism is its adherents.
   George Orwell
----
At 50, everyone has the face he deserves.
   George Orwell
----
Autobiography is only to be trusted when it reveals something disgraceful. A man who gives a good account of himself is probably lying, since any life when viewed from the inside is simply a series of defeats.
   George Orwell
----
But the thing that I saw in your face no power can disinherit: No bomb that ever burst shatters the crystal spirit.
   George Orwell
----
Doublethink means the power of holding two contradictory beliefs in one's mind simultaneously, and accepting both of them.
   George Orwell
----
Early in life I had noticed that no event is ever correctly reported in a newspaper.
   George Orwell
----
Enlightened people seldom or never possess a sense of responsibility.
   George Orwell
----
For a creative writer possession of the "truth" is less important than emotional sincerity.
   George Orwell
----
Four legs good, two legs bad.
   George Orwell
----
Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows.
   George Orwell
----
Good novels are not written by orthodoxy-sniffers, nor by people who are conscience-stricken about their own orthodoxy. Good novels are written by people who are not frightened.
   George Orwell
----
He is a man of thirty-five, but looks fifty. He is bald, has varicose veins and wears spectacles, or would wear them if his only pair were not chronically lost. If things are normal with him, he will be suffering from malnutrition, but if he has recently had a lucky streak, he will be suffering from a hangover. At present, it is half past eleven in the morning, and according to his schedule he should have started work two hours ago; but even if he had made any serious effort to start, he would have been frustrated by the almost continuous ringing of the telephone bell, the yells of the baby, the rattle of an electric drill out in the street, and the heavy boots of his creditors clumping up the stairs. The most recent interruption was the arrival of the second post, which brought him two circulars and an income tax demand printed in red. Needless to say, this person is a writer.
   George Orwell
----
He is as antisocial as a flea. Clearly, such people are undesirable, and a society in which they can flourish has something wrong with it.
   George Orwell
----
He is fiddling while Rome is burning, and, unlike the enormous majority of people who do this, fiddling with his face towards the flames.
   George Orwell
----
He left behind, as his essential contribution to literature, a large repertoire of jokes which survive because of their sheer neatness, and because of a certain intriguing uncertainty - which extends to Wilde himself - as to whether they really mean anything.
   George Orwell
----
He who controls the past commands the future. He who commands the future conquers the past.
   George Orwell
----
I sometimes think that the price of liberty is not so much eternal vigilance as eternal dirt.
   George Orwell
----
If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face - forever.
   George Orwell
----
In every one of those little stucco boxes there's some poor bastard who's never free except when he's fast asleep and dreaming that he's got the boss down the bottom of a well and is bunging lumps of coal at him.
   George Orwell
----
In our time, political speech and writing are largely the defence of the indefensible.
   George Orwell
----
Joyce is a poet and also an elephantine pedant.
   George Orwell
----
Language ought to be the joint creation of poets and manual workers.
   George Orwell
----
Men are only as good as their technical development allows them to be.
   George Orwell
----
Men can only be happy when they do not assume that the object of life is happiness.
   George Orwell
----
Most people get a fair amount of fun out of their lives, but on balance life is suffering, and only the very young or the very foolish imagine otherwise.
   George Orwell
----
Most revolutionaries are potential Tories, because they imagine that everything can be put right by altering the shape of society; once that change is effected, as it sometimes is, they see no need for any other.
   George Orwell
----
Myths which are believed in tend to become true.
   George Orwell
----
Nationalism is power hunger tempered by self-deception.
   George Orwell
----
No advance in wealth, no softening of manners, no reform or revolution has ever brought human equality a millimetre nearer.
   George Orwell
----
No one can look back on his schooldays and say with truth that they were altogether unhappy.
   George Orwell
----
Not to expose your true feelings to an adult seems to be instinctive from the age of seven or eight onwards.
   George Orwell
----
On the whole, human beings want to be good, but not too good, and not quite all the time.
   George Orwell
----
One can love a child, perhaps, more deeply than one can love another adult, but it is rash to assume that the child feels any love in return.
   George Orwell
----
One cannot really be a Catholic and grown up.
   George Orwell
----
One of the effects of a safe and civilized life is an immense oversensitiveness which makes all the primary emotions somewhat disgusting. Generosity is as painful as meanness, gratitude as hateful as ingratitude.
   George Orwell
----
Part of the reason for the ugliness of adults, in a child's eyes, is that the child is usually looking upwards, and few faces are at their best when seen from below.
   George Orwell
----
Political speech and writing are largely the defense of the indefensible.
   George Orwell
----
Power is not a means, it is an end. One does not establish a dictatorship in order to safeguard a revolution; one makes the revolution in order to establish the dictatorship.
   George Orwell
----
Power-worship blurs political judgment because it leads, almost unavoidably, to the belief that present trends will continue. Whoever is winning at the moment will always seem to be invincible.
   George Orwell
----
Probably the battle of Waterloo was won on the playing-fields of Eton, but the opening battles of all subsequent wars have been lost there.
   George Orwell
----
Progress and reaction have both turned out to be swindles. Seemingly, there is nothing left but quietism - robbing reality of its terrors by simply submitting to it.
   George Orwell
----
Progress is not an illusion, it happens, but it is slow and invariably disappointing.
   George Orwell
----
Prolonged, indiscriminate reviewing of books is a quite exceptionally thankless, irritating and exhausting job. It not only involves praising trash but constantly inventing reactions towards books about which one has no spontaneous feeling whatever.
   George Orwell
----
Saints should always be judged guilty until they are proved innocent.
   George Orwell
----
Serious sport has nothing to do with fair play. It is bound up with hatred, jealousy, boastfulness, disregard of all rules and sadistic pleasure in witnessing violence. In other words, it is war minus the shooting.
   George Orwell
----
So much of left-wing thought is a kind of playing with fire by people who don't even know that fire is hot.
   George Orwell
----
Society has always seemed to demand a little more from human beings than it will get in practice.
   George Orwell
----
The Catholic and the Communist are alike in assuming that an opponent cannot be both honest and intelligent.
   George Orwell
----
The English are probably more capable than most peoples of making revolutionary change without bloodshed. In England, if anywhere, it would be possible to abolish poverty without destroying liberty.
   George Orwell
----
The atmosphere of orthodoxy is always damaging to prose, and above all it is completely ruinous to the novel, the most anarchical of all forms of literature.
   George Orwell
----
The atom bombs are piling up in the factories, the police are prowling through the cities, the lies are streaming from the loudspeakers, but the earth is still going round the sun.
   George Orwell
----
The books one reads in childhood, and perhaps most of all the bad and good bad books, create in one's mind a sort of false map of the world, a series of fabulous countries into which one can retreat at odd moments throughout the rest of life, and which in some cases can survive a visit to the real countries which they are supposed to represent.
   George Orwell
----
The child thinks of growing old as an almost obscene calamity, which for some mysterious reason will never happen to itself. All who have passed the age of thirty are joyless grotesques, endlessly fussing about things of no importance and staying alive without, so far as the child can see, having anything to live for. Only child life is real life.
   George Orwell
----
The essence of being human is that one does not seek perfection, that one is sometimes willing to commit sins for the sake of loyalty, that one does not push asceticism to the point where it makes friendly intercourse impossible, and that one is prepared in the end to be defeated and broken up by life, which is the inevitable price of fastening one's love upon other human individuals.
   George Orwell
----
The existence of good bad literature - the fact that one can be amused or excited or even moved by a book that one's intellect simply refuses to take seriously - is a reminder that art is not the same thing as cerebration.
   George Orwell
----
The great disadvantage, and advantage, of the small urban bourgeois is his limited outlook. He sees the world as a middle-class world, and everything outside these limits is either laughable or slightly wicked.
   George Orwell
----
The great enemy of clear language is insincerity. When there is a gap between one's real and one's declared aims, one turns as it were instinctively to long words and exhausted idioms, like a cuttlefish squirting out ink.
   George Orwell
----
The high sentiments always win in the end, the leaders who offer blood, toil, tears and sweat always get more out of their followers than those who offer safety and a good time. When it comes to the pinch, human beings are heroic.
   George Orwell
----
The intellectual is different from the ordinary man, but only in certain sections of his personality, and even then not all the time.
   George Orwell
----
The main motive for "nonattachment" is a desire to escape from the pain of living, and above all from love, which, sexual or non-sexual, is hard work.
   George Orwell
----
The moralist and the revolutionary are constantly undermining one another. Marx exploded a hundred tons of dynamite beneath the moralist position, and we are still living in the echo of that tremendous crash. But already, somewhere or other, the sappers are at work and fresh dynamite is being tamped in place to blow Marx at the moon. Then Marx, or somebody like him, will come back with yet more dynamite, and so the process continues, to an end we cannot foresee.
   George Orwell
----
The "Communism" of the English intellectual is something explicable enough. It is the patriotism of the deracinated.
   George Orwell
----
There is hardly such a thing as a war in which it makes no difference who wins. Nearly always one side stands more or less for progress, the other side more or less for reaction.
   George Orwell
----
Throughout recorded time ... there have been three kinds of people in the world, the High, the Middle, and the Low. They have been subdivided in many ways, they have borne countless different names, and their relative numbers, as well as their attitude towards one another, have varied from age to age: but the essential structure of society has never altered. Even after enormous upheavals and seemingly irrevocable changes, the same pattern has always reasserted itself, just as a gyroscope will always return to equilibrium, however far it is pushed one way or the other. The aims of these three groups are entirely irreconcilable.
   George Orwell
----
To a surprising extent the war-lords in shining armour, the apostles of the martial virtues, tend not to die fighting when the time comes. History is full of ignominious getaways by the great and famous.
   George Orwell
----
To accept civilization as it is practically means accepting decay.
   George Orwell
----
To an ordinary human being, love means nothing if it does not mean loving some people more than others.
   George Orwell
----
To say "I accept" in an age like our own is to say that you accept concentration-camps, rubber truncheons, Hitler, Stalin, bombs, aeroplanes, tinned food, machine guns, putsches, purges, slogans, Bedaux belts, gas-masks, submarines, spies, provocateurs, press-censorship, secret prisons, aspirins, Hollywood films and political murder.
   George Orwell
----
To survive it is often necessary to fight and to fight you have to dirty yourself.
   George Orwell
----
To walk through the ruined cities of Germany is to feel an actual doubt about the continuity of civilization.
   George Orwell
----
To write or even speak English is not a science but an art. There are no reliable words. ... Whoever writes English is involved in a struggle that never lets up even for a sentence. He is struggling against vagueness, against obscurity, against the lure of the decorative adjective, against the encroachment of Latin and Greek, and, above all, against the worn-out phrases and dead metaphors with which the language is cluttered up.
   George Orwell
----
Under the spreading chestnut tree I sold you and you sold me: There lie they, and here lie we Under the spreading chestnut tree.
   George Orwell
----
We of the sinking middle class ... may sink without further struggles into the working class where we belong, and probably when we get there it will not be so dreadful as we feared, for, after all, we have nothing to lose but our aitches.
   George Orwell
----
What can you do against the lunatic who is more intelligent than yourself, who gives your arguments a fair hearing and then simply persists in his lunacy?
   George Orwell
----
Who controls the past controls the future: who controls the present controls the past.
   George Orwell
----
I have a quote for every event, except for this one.
   Ido Kanner
----
I care not much for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
A Government of the people, by the people and for the people, shall not perish from the earth.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
A house divided against itself cannot stand - I believe this government cannot endure permanently half slave and half free.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
A jury too often has at least one member more ready to hang the panel than to hang the traitor.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
A universal feeling, whether well or ill founded, cannot be safely disregarded.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
A woman is the only thing I am afraid of that I know will not hurt me.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
All my life I have tried to pluck a thistle and plant a flower wherever the flower would grow in thought and mind.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
All that I am or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Among free men there can be no successful appeal from the ballot to the bullet.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
As I would not be a slave, so I would not be a master. This expresses my idea of democracy.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
As our case is new, we must think and act anew.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Avoid popularity if you would have peace.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Ballots are the rightful and peaceful successors of bullets.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Be sure you put your feet in the right place, then stand firm.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Beware of rashness, but with energy, and sleepless vigilance, go forward and give us victories.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
But in a larger sense we cannot dedicate, we cannot consecrate, we cannot hallow this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it far above our poor power to add or detract.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Character is like a tree and reputation like its shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Commitment is what transforms a promise into reality.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Common looking people are the best in the world: that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Determine that the thing can and shall be done, and then we shall find the way.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Do not destroy that immortal emblem of humanity, the Declaration of Independence.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Do not worry; eat three square meals a day; say your prayers; be courteous to your creditors; keep your digestion good; exercise; go slow and easy. Maybe there are other things your special case requires to make you happy; but, my friend, these I reckon will give you a good lift.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Don't worry when you are not recognized, but strive to be worthy of recognition.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Every man is said to have his peculiar ambition.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Every man over forty is responsible for his face.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Everybody likes a compliment.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Fellow citizens, we cannot escape history.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Few can be induced to labor exclusively for posterity; and none will do it enthusiastically. Posterity has done nothing for us; and theorize on it as we may, practically we shall do very little for it, unless we are made to think we are at the same time doing something for ourselves.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Force is all-conquering, but its victories are short-lived.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Fourscore and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. We here highly resolve that the dead shall not have died in vain, that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom; and that government of the people, by the people, and for the people, shall not perish from the earth.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Freedom is not the right to do what we want, but what we ought. Let us have faith that right makes might and in that faith let us; to the end, dare to do our duty as we understand it.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Freedom is the last, best hope of earth.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Friends, I agree with you in Providence; but I believe in the Providence of the most men, the largest purse, and the longest cannon.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
God must love the common man, he made so many of them.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Having thus chosen our course, without guile and with pure purpose, let us renew our trust in God, and go forward without fear and with manly hearts.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
He reminds me of the man who murdered both his parents, and then when the sentence was about to be pronounced, pleaded for mercy on the grounds that he was orphan.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
He who molds the public sentiment ... makes statues and decisions possible or impossible to make.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Hold on with a bulldog grip, and chew and choke as much as possible.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Honest statesmanship is the wise employment of individual meanness for the public good.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed but I am bound to live the best life that I have. I must stand with anybody that stands right and part from him when he goes wrong.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I am not concerned that you have fallen - I am concerned that you arise.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I believe, if we take habitual drunkards as a class, their heads and their hearts will bear an advantageous comparison with those of any other class. There seems ever to have been a proneness in the brilliant and warm-blooded to fall into this vice.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I bring to this great work a heart filled with love for my country and an honest desire to do what is right.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I can make a General in five minutes but a good horse is hard to replace.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I claim not to have controlled events, but confess plainly that events have controlled me.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I desire to so conduct the affairs of this administration that if at the end, when I come to lay down the reins of power, I have lost every other friend on earth, I shall at least have one friend left, and that friend shall be down inside of me.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I do the very best I know how - the very best I can; and I mean to keep on doing so until the end.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I don't know who my grandfather was; I am much more concerned to know what his grandson will be.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I don't think much of a man who is not wiser today than he was yesterday.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I dream of a place and a time where America will once again be seen as the last best hope on earth.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I fear explanations explanatory of things explained.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I have been driven many times to my knees by the overwhelming conviction that I had nowhere to go. My own wisdom, and that of all about me, seemed insufficient for the day.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I have come to the conclusion never again to think of marrying, and for this reason, I can never be satisfied with anyone who would be blockhead enough to have me.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I laugh because I must not cry. That is all. That is all.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I never had a policy; I have just tried to do my very best each and every day.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I see in the near future a crisis approaching that unnerves me and causes me to tremble for the safety of my country. Corporations have been enthroned, an era of corruption in high places will follow, and the money-power of the country will endeavor to prolong it's reign by working upon the prejudices of the people until the wealth is aggregated in a few hands and the Republic is destroyed.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I shall do more whenever I shall believe doing more will help the cause.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I shall try to correct errors when shown to be errors, and I shall adopt new views so fast as they shall appear to be new views.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I sincerely wish war was a pleasanter and easier business than it is, but it does not admit of holidays.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I walk slowly, but I never walk backward.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I want it said of me by those who knew me best, that I always plucked a thistle and planted a flower where I thought a flower would grow.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
I will prepare and some day my chance will come.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
If I care to listen to every criticism, let alone act on them, then this shop may as well be closed for all other businesses. I have learned to do my best, and if the end result is good then I do not care for any criticism, but if the end result is not good, then even the praise of ten angels would not make the difference.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
If I had eight hours to chop down a tree, I'd spend six sharpening my ax.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
If destruction be our lot, we must ourselves be its author and finisher. As a nation of freemen, we must live through all time, or die by suicide.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
If elected I shall be thankful; if not, it will be all the same.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
If once you forfeit the confidence of your fellow-citizens, you can never regain their respect and esteem.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
If there is anything that a man can do well, I say let him do it. Give him a chance.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
If we could first know where we are and whither we are tending, we could then better judge what to do and how to do it.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
If you want to win a man to your cause, first convince him that you are his sincere friend.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
If you would win a man to your cause, first convince him that you are his sincere friend. Therein is a drop of honey that catches his heart, which, say what you will, is the great high-road to his reason, and which, when once gained, you will find but little trouble in convincing his judgment of the justice of your cause.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
In giving freedom to the slave, we assure freedom to the free - honorable alike in what we give and what we preserve.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
It is the eternal struggle between these two principles - right and wrong. They are the two principles that have stood face to face from the beginning of time and will ever continue to struggle. It is the same spirit that says, "You work and toil and earn bread, and I'll eat it."
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Labor is prior to, and independent of, capital. Capital is only the fruit of labor, and could never have existed if labor had not first existed. Labor is the superior of capital, and deserves much the higher consideration. Capital has its rights, which are as worthy of protection as any other rights.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Let no feeling of discouragement prey upon you, and in the end you are sure to succeed.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Let not him who is houseless pull down the house of another, but let him work diligently and build one for himself, thus by example assuring that his own shall be safe from violence when built.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Let the people know the truth and the country is safe.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Marriage is neither heaven nor hell, it is simply purgatory.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Military glory - the attractive rainbow that rises in showers of blood.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Must a government be too strong for the liberties of its people or too weak to maintain its own existence?
   Abraham Lincoln
----
My father taught me to work, but he did not teach me to love it.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
My great concern is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with your failure.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
No man has a good enough memory to make a successful liar.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
No man is good enough to govern another man without that other's consent.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Nothing valuable can be lost by taking time.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
People who like this sort of thing will find this the sort of thing they like.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Prohibition goes beyond the bounds of reason in that it attempts to control a man's appetite by legislation and makes crimes out of things that are not crimes.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Prohibition will work great injury to the cause of temperance. It is a species of intemperance within itself, for it goes beyond the bounds of reason in that it attempts to control a man's appetite by legislation, and makes a crime out of things that are not crimes. A Prohibition law strikes a blow at the very principles upon which our government was founded.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Property is the fruit of labor; property is desirable; it is a positive good in the world.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Public sentiment is everything, without it nothing can fail, without it nothing can succeed.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Quarrel not at all. No man resolved to make the most of himself can spare time for personal contention. Still less can he afford to take all the consequences, including the vitiating of his temper and loss of self control. Yield larger things to which you can show no more than equal right; and yield lesser ones, though clearly your own. Better give your path to a dog than be bitten by him in contesting for the right. Even killing the dog would not cure the bite.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Seriously, I do not think I am fit for the presidency.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Slavery is founded on the selfishness of man's nature - opposition to it on his love of justice. These principles are in eternal antagonism; and when brought into collision so fiercely as slavery extension brings them, shocks and throes and convulsions must ceaselessly follow.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Tell me what brand of whiskey that Grant drinks. I would like to send a barrel of it to my other generals.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
That some should be rich, shows that others may become rich, and, hence, is just encouragement to industry and enterprise.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
The best thing about the future is that it comes only one day at a time.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
The dogmas of the quiet past are inadequate to the stormy present. The occasion is piled high with difficulty, and we must rise with the occasion. As our case is new, so we must think anew and act anew.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
The fiery trials through which we pass will light us down in honor or dishonor to the latest generation.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
The power confided in me will be used to hold, occupy and possess the property and places belonging to the government, and to collect the duties and imposts.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
The probability that we may fail in the struggle ought not to deter us from the support of a cause we believe to be just.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
The sense of obligation to continue is present in all of us. A duty to strive is the duty of us all. I felt a call to that duty.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
The shepherd drives the wolf from the sheep's throat, for which the sheep thanks the shepherd as his liberator, while the wolf denounces him for the same act as the destroyer of liberty.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
The things I want to know are in books; my best friend is the man who'll get me a book I ain't read.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
The way for a young man to rise is to improve himself in every way he can, never suspecting that anybody wishes to hinder him.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
There are few things wholly evil or wholly good. Almost everything, especially of government policy, is an inseparable compound of the two, so that our best judgment of the preponderance between them is continually demanded.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
These capitalists generally act harmoniously and in concert, to fleece the people.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Those who deny freedom to others, deserve it not for themselves.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
To correct the evils, great and small, which spring from want of sympathy and from positive enmity among strangers, as nations or as individuals, is one of the highest functions of civilization.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
To sin by silence, when they should protest, makes cowards of men.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Upon the subject of education, not presuming to dictate any plan or system respecting it, I can only say that I view it as the most important subject which we as a people may be engaged in. That everyone may receive at least a moderate education appears to be an objective of vital importance.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Wanting to work is so rare a merit that it should be encouraged.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
We know nothing of what will happen in future, but by the analogy of experience.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
We live in the midst of alarms; anxiety beclouds the future; we expect some new disaster with each newspaper we read.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
We must ask where we are and whither we are tending.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory, stretching from every battlefield and patriot grave, to every living heart and hearth-stone, all over this broad land, will yet swell the chorus of the Union when again touched, as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
We must not promise what we ought not, lest we be called on to perform what we cannot.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
We should be too big to take offense and too noble to give it.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Were it not for my little jokes, I could not bear the burdens of this office.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
What is conservatism? It is not adherence to the old and tried, but against the new and untried.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
What kills the skunk is the publicity it gives itself.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
When I do good, I feel good. When I do bad, I feel bad. And that's my religion.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
When I hear a man preach, I like to see him act as if he were fighting bees.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
When I'm getting ready to reason with a man, I spend one-third of my time thinking about myself and what I am going to say and two-thirds thinking about him and what he is going to say.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
When you have got an elephant by the hind legs and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Whenever I hear anyone arguing for slavery, I feel a strong impulse to see it tried on him personally.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Whether or not the world would be vastly benefited by a total banishment from it of all intoxicating drinks seems not now an open question. Three-fourths of mankind confess the affirmative with their tongues, and I believe all the rest acknowledge it in their hearts.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Will springs from the two elements of moral sense and self-interest.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
With high hope for the future, no prediction is ventured.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
With the catching ends the pleasures of the chase.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
You can fool some of the people all the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you cannot fool all of the people all the time.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
You cannot escape the responsibility of tomorrow by evading it today.
   Abraham Lincoln
----
Any solid lighter than a fluid will, if placed in the fluid, be so far immersed that the weight of the solid will be equal to the weight of the fluid displaced.

   Archimedes, On Floating Bodies, I, prop 5
----
Do not disturb my circles! (Noli turbare circulos meos.)
   Archimedes
----
Give me a place to stand and I will move the earth.
   Archimedes
----
There are things which seem incredible to most men who have not studied mathematics.
   Archimedes
----
Consider how much more you often suffer from your anger and grief, than from those very things for which you are angry and grieved.
   Marcus Antonius
----
Mark how fleeting and paltry is the estate of man - yesterday in embryo, tomorrow a mummy or ashes. So for the hairsbreadth of time assigned to thee, live rationally, and part with life cheerfully, as drops the ripe olive, extolling the season that bore it and the tree that matured it.
   Marcus Antonius
----
Opinion is the main thing which does harm or good in the world. It is our false opinions that ruin us.
   Marcus Antonius
----
Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present.
   Marcus Aurelius, Meditations
----
Observe always that everything is the result of a change, and get used to thinking that there is nothing Nature loves so well as to change existing forms and to make new ones like them.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
The work of philosophy is simple and discreet. Let us not get carried away by the swollen puffiness of solemn affectation.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
A man should be upright, not be kept upright.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
A man should remove not only unnecessary acts, but also unnecessary thoughts, for then superfluous activity will not follow.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
A man's happiness: to do the things proper to man.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
A man's life is what his thoughts make of it.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with whom fate brings you together, but do so with all your heart.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Adapt yourself to the things among which your lot has been cast and love sincerely the fellow creatures with whom destiny has ordained that you shall live.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
And thou wilt give thyself relief, if thou doest every act of thy life as if it were the last.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Because your own strength is unequal to the task, do not assume that it is beyond the powers of man; but if anything is within the powers and province of man, believe that it is within your own compass also.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Confine yourself to the present.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Constantly observe everything that takes place by change, and adapt yourself to consider that the universe's nature loves nothing as much as changing things that are, and making new things like them. In a way, everything that exists is like the seed of what it will be.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Death is a release from the impressions of the senses, and from desires that make us their puppets, and from the vagaries of the mind, and from the hard service of the flesh.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Despise not death, but welcome it, for nature wills it like all else.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Dig within. Within is the wellspring of Good; and it is always ready to bubble up, if you just dig.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Do every act of your life as if it were your last.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Each thing is of like form from everlasting and comes round again in its cycle.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Every man's life lies within the present; for the past is spent and done with, and the future is uncertain.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Everything that exists is in a manner the seed of that which will be.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
He who lives in harmony with himself lives in harmony with the universe.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Here is the rule to remember in the future, When anything tempts you to be bitter: not, "This is a misfortune" but "To bear this worthily is good fortune."
   Marcus Aurelius
----
How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
How much time he saves who does not look to see what his neighbor says or does or thinks.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
I have often wondered how it is everyone loves himself more than the rest of men, but yet sets less value on his own opinions of himself than the opinions of others.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
If it is not right do not do it; if it is not true do not say it.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
If thou workest at that which is before thee ... expecting nothing, fearing nothing, but satisfied with thy present activity according to Nature, and with heroic truth in every word and sound which thou utterest, thou wilt live happy. And there is no man who is able to prevent this.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself but to your own estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
If you are pained by external things, it is not they that disturb you, but your own judgment of them. And it is in your power to wipe out that judgment now.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
It is not the weight of the future or the past that is pressing upon you, but ever that of the present alone. Even this burden, too, can be lessened if you confine it strictly to its own limits.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Let it be your constant method to look into the design of people's actions, and see what they would be at, as often as it is practicable; and to make this custom the more significant, practice it first upon yourself.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Let men see, let them know, a real man, who lives as he was meant to live.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Let not your mind run on what you lack as much as on what you have already.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Life is neither good or evil, but only a place for good and evil.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Live not as though there were a thousand years ahead of you. Fate is at your elbow; make yourself good while life and power are still yours.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Look well into thyself; there is a source which will always spring up if thou wilt always search there.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Loss is nothing else but change, and change is Nature's delight.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Love only what befalls you and is spun for you by fate.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Man must be arched and buttressed from within, else the temple wavers to dust.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Men exist for the sake of one another.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Nothing befalls a man except what is in his nature to endure.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Nothing happens to any man that he is not formed by nature to bear.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Nothing has such power to broaden the mind as the ability to investigate systematically and truly all that comes under thy observation in life.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Nowhere can man find a quieter or more untroubled retreat than in his own soul.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Observe constantly that all things take place by change, and accustom thyself to consider that the nature of the Universe loves nothing so much as to change the things which are, and to make new things like them.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Our life depends on what our thoughts make it.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Remember how often you have postponed minding your interest, and let slip those opportunities the gods have given you. It is now high time to consider what sort of world you are part of, and from what kind of governor of it you are descended; that you have a set period assigned you to act in, and unless you improve it to brighten and compose your thoughts, it will quickly run off with you, and be lost beyond recovery.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Remember that very little is needed to make a happy life.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
That which is not good for the beehive cannot be good for the bees.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
The art of living is more like wrestling than dancing.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
To understand the true quality of people, you must look into their minds, and examine their pursuits and aversions.
   Marcus Aurelius
----
Soon silence will have passed into legend. Man has turned his back on silence. Day after day he invents machines and devices that increase noise and distract humanity from the essence of life, contemplation, meditation.
   Jean Arp
----
All human evil comes from a single cause, man's inability to sit still in a room.
   Blaise Pascal
----
All of our reasoning ends in surrender to feeling.
   Blaise Pascal 
----
As men are not able to fight against death, misery, ignorance, they have taken it into their heads, in order to be happy, not to think of them at all.
   Blaise Pascal
----
Atheism shows strength of mind, but only to a certain degree.
   Blaise Pascal 
----
Belief is a wise wager. Granted that faith cannot be proved, what harm will come to you if you gamble on its truth and it proves false? If you gain, you gain all; if you lose, you lose nothing. Wager, then, without hesitation, that He exists.
   Blaise Pascal 
----
Between us and heaven or hell there is only life, which is the frailest thing in the world.
   Blaise Pascal 
----
Can anything be stupider than that a man has the right to kill me because he lives on the other side of a river and his ruler has a quarrel with mine, though I have not quarrelled with him?
   Blaise Pascal 
----
Chance gives rise to thoughts, and chance removes them; no art can keep or acquire them.
   Blaise Pascal 
----
Concupiscence and force are the source of all our actions; concupiscence causes voluntary actions, force involuntary ones.
   Blaise Pascal
----
Continuous eloquence wearies. Grandeur must be abandoned to be appreciated. Continuity in everything is unpleasant. Cold is agreeable, that we may get warm.
   Blaise Pascal 
----
Each player must accept the cards life deals him or her: but once they are in hand, he or she alone must decide how to play the cards in order to win the game.
   Voltaire
----
There are men who can think no deeper than a fact
   Voltaire
----
say, "Believe as I do, or I shall assassinate you"
   Voltaire
----
What is madness? To have erroneous perceptions and to reason correctly from them
   Voltaire
----
Ice-cream is exquisite. What a pity it isn't illegal.
   Voltaire
----
Christianity is the most ridiculous, the most absurd, and bloody religion that has ever infected the world
   Voltaire
----
The best government is a benevolent tyranny tempered by an occasional assassination.
   Voltaire
----
Men hate the individual whom they call avaricious only because nothing can be gained from him.
   Voltaire
----
Our wretched species is so made that those who walk on the well-trodden path always throw stones at those who are showing a new road
   Voltaire
----
It is not enough to conquer; one must also know how to seduce
   Voltaire
----
To succeed in chaining the multitude, you must seem to wear the same fetters
   Voltaire
----
The very impossibility in which I find myself to prove that God is not, discovers to me his existence.
   Voltaire
----
Four thousand volumes of metaphysics will not teach us what the soul is
   Voltaire
----
Doubt is uncomfortable, certainty is ridiculous.
   Voltaire
----
We cannot wish for that we know not.
   Voltaire
----
Chance is a word void of sense; nothing can exist without a cause.
   Voltaire
----
All is for the best in the best of all possible worlds.
   Voltaire
----
The great consolation in life is to say what one thinks
   Voltaire
----
Your destiny is that of a man, and your vows those of a god.
   Voltaire
----
Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly
   Voltaire
----
One always speaks badly when one has nothing to say
   Voltaire
----
Think for yourselves and let others enjoy the privilege to do so, too
   Voltaire
----
I keep to old books, for they teach me something; from the new I learn very little.
   Voltaire
----
Superstition sets the whole world in flames; philosophy quenches them
   Voltaire
----
The art of government is to make two-thirds of a nation pay all it possibly can pay for the benefit of the other third.
   Voltaire
----
To announce truths is an infallible receipt for being persecuted.
   Voltaire
----
There are truths that are not for all men, nor for all occasions
   Voltaire
----
One of the chief misfortunes of honest people is that they are cowardly.
   Voltaire
----
For seventeen hundred years the Christian sect has done nothing but harm
   Voltaire
----
Everything persecutes me in this world, even things that do not exist
   Voltaire
----
If God created us in His image we have certainly returned the compliment.
   Voltaire
----
He must be very ignorant for he answers every question he is asked
   Voltaire
----
Every abuse ought to be reformed, unless the reform is more dangerous than the abuse itself.
   Voltaire
----
Only your friends steal your books
   Voltaire
----
The first priest was the first rogue who met the first fool
   Voltaire
----
It is far better to be silent than merely to increase the quantity of bad books
   Voltaire
----
Of all religions, Christianity is without a doubt the one that should inspire tolerance most, although, up to now, the Christians have been the most intolerant of all men
   Voltaire
----
Philosopher: A lover of wisdom, which is to say, Truth
   Voltaire
----
Poetry is the music of the soul, and, above all, of great and feeling souls.
   Voltaire
----
His face bespoke his soul
   Voltaire
----
It is with books as with men: a very small number play a great part, the rest are lost in the multitude
   Voltaire
----
It is lamentable, that to be a good patriot one must become the enemy of the rest of mankind.
   Voltaire
----
The best is the enemy of the good.
   Voltaire
----
Appreciation is a wonderful thing: It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well
   Voltaire
----
Woe to the makers of literal translations, who by rendering every word weaken the meaning! It is indeed by so doing that we can say the letter kills and the spirit gives life.
   Voltaire
----
Work spares us from three evils: boredom, vice, and need
   Voltaire
----
It is vain for the coward to flee; death follows close behind; it is only by defying it that the brave escape.
   Voltaire
----
To hold a pen is to be at war.
   Voltaire
----
Doubt is not a pleasant condition but certainty is an absurd one.
   Voltaire
----
I cannot imagine how the clockwork of the universe can exist without a clockmaker.
   Voltaire
----
It is not known precisely where angels dwell -- whether in the air, the void, or the planets. It has not been God's pleasure that we should be informed of their abode.
   Voltaire
----
Let us read and let us dance - two amusements that will never do any harm to the world.
   Voltaire
----
It is said that the present is pregnant with the future.
   Voltaire
----
All succeeds with people who are of cheerful disposition
   Voltaire
----
A long dispute means both parties are wrong
   Voltaire
----
Nothing can be more contrary to religion and the clergy than reason and common sense
   Voltaire
----
The first step, my son, which one makes in the world, is the one on which depends the rest of our days.
   Voltaire
----
History is nothing but a pack of tricks that we play upon the dead
   Voltaire
----
All men are born with a nose and ten fingers, but no one was born with a knowledge of God
   Voltaire
----
Men appear to prefer to ruin one another's fortunes, and to cut each other's throats over a few miserable villages, than to extend the means of human happiness
   Voltaire
----
We have a natural right to make use of our pens as of our tongues, at our peril, risk and hazard.
   Voltaire
----
Indeed, history is nothing more than a tableau of crimes and misfortunes.
   Voltaire
----
Injustice in the end produces independence.
   Voltaire
----
History is fables agreed upon.
   Voltaire
----
Anyone who seeks to destroy the passions instead of controlling them is trying to play the angel.
   Voltaire
----
When we hear news we should always wait for the sacrament of confirmation
   Voltaire
----
That is well said, replied Candide, but we must cultivate our garden
   Voltaire
----
Doctors are men who prescribe medicines of which they know little, to cure diseases of which they know less, in human beings of whom they know nothing
   Voltaire
----
If God did not exist it would be necessary to invent Him. But all nature cries aloud that He does exist.
   Voltaire
----
If you wish to converse with me, define your terms
   Voltaire
----
Men use thought only as authority for their injustice, and employ speech only to conceal their thoughts
   Voltaire
----
He is a hard man who is only just, and a sad one who is only wise.
   Voltaire
----
All the citizens of a state cannot be equally powerful, but they may be equally free
   Voltaire
----
Doubt is not a pleasant condition, but certainty is absurd
   Voltaire
----
It is as impossible to translate poetry as it is to translate music.
   Voltaire
----
Pleasure is the object, duty and the goal of all rational creatures.
   Voltaire
----
Since the whole affair had become one of religion, the vanquished were of course exterminated
   Voltaire
----
Do well and you will have no need for ancestors.
   Voltaire
----
The punishment of criminals should be of use; when a man is hanged he is good for nothing
   Voltaire
----
How I like the boldness of the English, how I like the people who say what they think!
   Voltaire
----
I know many books which have bored their readers, but I know of none which has done real evil
   Voltaire
----
It is an infantile superstition of the human spirit that virginity would be thought a virtue and not the barrier that separates ignorance from knowledge
   Voltaire
----
God is a comedian, playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.
   Voltaire
----
Self-love is the instrument of our preservation.
   Voltaire
----
He was a great patriot, a humanitarian, a loyal friend - provided, of course, that he really is dead.
   Voltaire
----
No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible.
   Voltaire
----
Illusion is the first of the pleasures
   Voltaire
----
It is today, my dear, that I take a perilous leap.
   Voltaire
----
Clever tyrants are never punished.
   Voltaire
----
We owe respect to the living. To the dead we owe only truth.
   Voltaire
----
Governments need to have both shepherds and butchers.
   Voltaire
----
You must have the devil in you to succeed in any of the arts
   Voltaire
----
Tyrants have always some slight shade of virtue; they support the laws before destroying them
   Voltaire
----
I know of nothing more laughable than a doctor who does not die of old age.
   Voltaire
----
You will notice that in all disputes between Christians since the birth of the Church, Rome has always favored the doctrine which most completely subjugated the human mind and annihilated reason
   Voltaire
----
When he who hears does not know what he who speaks means, and when he who speaks does not know what he himself means, that is philosophy
   Voltaire
----
Use, do not abuse; neither abstinence nor excess ever renders man happy.
   Voltaire
----
They (the British) are like their own beer; froth on top, dregs at bottom, the middle excellent
   Voltaire
----
The person ready to believe unlikely and unproved things is readily made a slave of by the crafty
   Voltaire
----
Prejudice is the reason of fools
   Voltaire
----
To a toad, what is beauty? A female with two pop-eyes, a wide mouth, yellow belly and spotted back
   Voltaire
----
The only way to compel men to speak good of us is to do it.
   Voltaire
----
In this country it is considered wise to kill an admiral from time to time in order to encourage the others
   Voltaire
----
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
   Voltaire
----
God is not on the side of the big battalions, but on the side of those who shoot best
   Voltaire
----
I should stop myself from dying if a good joke or a good idea occurred to me
   Voltaire
----
How inexpressible is the meanness of being a hypocrite! how horrible is it to be a mischievous and malignant hypocrite.
   Voltaire
----
It requires ages to destroy a popular opinion
   Voltaire
----
We must distinguish between speaking to deceive and being silent to be reserved.
   Voltaire
----
Prejudice is an opinion without judgment
   Voltaire
----
I die adoring God, loving my friends, not hating my enemies, and detesting superstition
   Voltaire
----
Whatever you do, stamp out abuses, and love those who love you.
   Voltaire
----
Ideas are like beards; men do not have them until they grow up.
   Voltaire
----
Very learned women are to be found, in the same manner as female warriors; but they are seldom or ever inventors.
   Voltaire
----
There are no sects in geometry
   Voltaire
----
We are rarely proud when we are alone.
   Voltaire
----
Divorce is probably of nearly the same date as marriage. I believe, however, that marriage is some weeks the more ancient.
   Voltaire
----
The atheists are for the most part impudent and misguided scholars who reason badly, and who, not being able to understand the Creation, the origin of evil, and other difficulties, have recourse to the hypothesis of the eternity of things and of inev
   Voltaire
----
Love is a canvas furnished by Nature and embroidered by imagination.
   Voltaire
----
But nothing is more estimable than a physician who, having studied nature from his youth, knows the properties of the human body, the diseases which assail it, the remedies which will benefit it, exercises his art with caution, and pays equal attention to the rich and the poor.
   Voltaire
----
It is one of the superstitions of the human mind to have imagined that virginity could be a virtue.
   Voltaire
----
It is amusing that a virtue is made of the vice of chastity; and it's a pretty odd sort of chastity at that, which leads men straight into the sin of Onan, and girls to the waning of their color
   Voltaire
----
An infallible method of making fanatics is to persuade before you instruct
   Voltaire
----
By appreciation, we make excellence in others our own property.
   Voltaire
----
The poor man is never free; he serves in every country
   Voltaire
----
He who is not just is severe, he who is not wise is sad.
   Voltaire
----
The secret of being tiresome is in telling everything.
   Voltaire
----
The sentiment of justice is so natural, and so universally acquired by all mankind, that it seems to be independent of all law, all party, all religion.
   Voltaire
----
Nothing would be more tiresome than eating and drinking if God had not made them a pleasure as well as a necessity.
   Voltaire
----
In my life, I have prayed but one prayer: oh Lord, make my enemies ridiculous. And God granted it.
   Voltaire
----
I believe that there never was a creator of a philosophical system who did not confess at the end of his life that he had wasted his time. It must be admitted that the inventors of the mechanical arts have been much more useful to men that the inventors of syllogisms. He who imagined a ship towers considerably above him who imagined innate ideas.
   Voltaire
----
A woman can keep one secret - the secret of her age
   Voltaire
----
Fear follows crime, and is its punishment
   Voltaire
----
This agglomeration which was called and which still calls itself the Holy Roman Empire was neither holy, nor Roman, nor an Empire
   Voltaire
----
It is fancy rather than taste which produces so many new fashions
   Voltaire
----
In general, the art of government consists in taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other
   Voltaire
----
It is clear that the individual who persecutes a man, his brother, because he is not of the same opinion, is a monster
   Voltaire
----
What a heavy burden is a name that has become famous too soon.
   Voltaire
----
If there had been a censorship of the press in Rome we should have had today neither Horace nor Juvenal, nor the philosophical writings of Cicero
   Voltaire
----
Every man is guilty of all the good he didn't do
   Voltaire
----
God gave us the gift of life; it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well.
   Voltaire
----
Superstition is to religion what astrology is to astronomy: the mad daughter of a wise mother
   Voltaire
----
Whatever you do, crush the infamy
   Voltaire
----
Love truth, but pardon error
   Voltaire
----
Originality is nothing by judicious imitation. The most original writers borrowed one from another.
   Voltaire
----
I advise you to go on living solely to enrage those who are paying your annuities. It is the only pleasure I have left.
   Voltaire
----
Satire lies about literary men while they live and eulogy lies about them when they die.
   Voltaire
----
Judge a person by their questions, rather than their answers.
   Voltaire
----
Exaggeration, the inseparable companion of greatness
   Voltaire
----
Faith consists in believing when it is beyond the power of reason to believe.
   Voltaire
----
To enjoy life, we must touch much of it lightly
   Voltaire
----
All men have equal rights to liberty, to their property, and to the protection of the laws
   Voltaire
----
Life is thickly sown with thorns, and I know no other remedy than to pass quickly through them. The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us.
   Voltaire
----
It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong.
   Voltaire
----
From the pain come the dream
From the dream come the vision
From the vision come the people
From the people come the power
From this power come the change
   Peter Gabriel
----
One thing that really appeals to me is this idea of music being a living thing that has an evolution that, in a way, enables the artist to sell a process rather than a piece of product.
   Peter Gabriel
----
As the band got more successful, it was increasingly difficult to get people to take a risk with something that might jeopardize their livelihood.
   Peter Gabriel, on Genesis
----
I think it is the weak and the young and the minorities that you need to look after to get a healthy creative environment - to get a lot of choices, a lot of different styles of music, a lot experimental stuff that everyone else feeds off.
   Peter Gabriel
----
Without a good library, most interesting tasks are hard to do in C++;
but given a good library, almost any task can be made easy.
   Bjarne Stroustrup
----
If I were a medical man, I should prescribe a holiday to any patient who considered his work important.
   Bertrand Russell, The Autobiography of Bertrand Russell
----
With equal passion I have sought knowledge. I have wished to understand the hearts of men. I have wished to know why the stars shine. And I have tried to apprehend the Pythagorean power by which number holds sway about the flux. A little of this, but not much, I have achieved.
   Bertrand Russell, The Autobiography of Bertrand Russell
----
Of all forms of caution, caution in love is perhaps the most fatal to true happiness.
   Bertrand Russell
----
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, 
but wiser people so full of doubts.
    Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
----
Freedom of opinion can only exist when the government thinks itself secure.
    Bertrand Russell
----
All exact science is dominated by the idea of approximation.
    Bertrand Russell
----
The greatest challenge to any thinker is stating the problem in a way that will allow a solution.
   Bertrand Russell
----
War does not determine who is right. War determines who is left.
   Bertrand Russell
----
We are faced with the paradoxical fact that education has become one of the chief obstacles to intelligence and freedom of thought.
   Bertrand Russell
----
No man can be a good teacher unless he has feelings of warm affection toward his pupils and a genuine desire to impart to them what he believes to be of value.
   Bertrand Russell
----
One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Our mental make-up is suited to a life of very severe physical labor
   Bertrand Russell
----
The world that we must seek is a world in which the creative spirit is alive, in which life is an adventure full of joy and hope, based rather upon the impulse to construct than upon the desire to retain what we possess or to seize what is possessed by others.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Fear is the main source of superstition, and one of the main sources of cruelty. To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Envy consists in seeing things never in themselves, but only in their relations. If you desire glory, you may envy Napoleon, but Napoleon envied Caesar, Caesar envied Alexander, and Alexander, I daresay, envied Hercules, who never existed.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Extreme hopes are born from extreme misery.
   Bertrand Russell
----
The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge
   Bertrand Russell
----
Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.
   Bertrand Russell
----
So far as I can remember, there is not one word in the Gospels in praise of intelligence.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Men are born ignorant, not stupid. They are made stupid by education.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Science is what you know, philosophy is what you don't know.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Marriage is for women the commonest mode of livelihood, and the total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution.
   Bertrand Russell
----
People are zealous for a cause when they are not quite positive that it is true
   Bertrand Russell
----
Psychology often becomes the disease of which it should be the cure
   Bertrand Russell
----
If we could all live solitary and without labor, we could all enjoy this ecstasy of independence; since we cannot, its delights are only available to madmen and dictators
   Bertrand Russell
----
In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted.
   Bertrand Russell
----
No great achievement is possible without persistent work.
   Bertrand Russell
----
It [the world] must be a world in which affection has free play, in which love is purged of the instinct for domination, in which cruelty and envy have been dispelled by happiness and the unfettered development of all the instincts that build up life and fill it with mental delights. Such a world is possible; it waits only for men to wish to create it.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Three passions, simple but overwhelmingly strong, have governed my life: the longing for love, the search for knowledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind.
   Bertrand Russel
----
The point of philosophy is to start with something so simple as not to seem worth stating, and to end with something so paradoxical that no one will believe it.
   Bertrand Russel
----
The thing that I should wish to obtain from money would be leisure with security.
   Bertrand Russel
----
Much that passes as idealism is disguised hatred or disguised love of power.
   Bertrand Russel
----
To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead.
   Bertrand Russel
----
To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Religion is something left over from the infancy of our intelligence, it will fade away as we adopt reason and science as our guidelines.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Freedom in general may be defined as the absence of obstacles to the realization of desires
   Bertrand Russell
----
Love is something far more than desire for sexual intercourse; it is the principal means of escape from the loneliness which afflicts most men and women throughout the greater part of their lives.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Neither a man nor a crowd nor a nation can be trusted to act humanely or to think sanely under the influence of a great fear.
   Bertrand Russell
----
There is something feeble and a little contemptible about a man who cannot face the perils of life without the help of comfortable myths
   Bertrand Russell
----
Life is nothing but a competition to be the criminal rather than the victim.
   Bertrand Russell
----
If everything must have a cause, then God must have a cause. If there can be anything without a cause, it may just as well be the world as God, so that there cannot be any validity in that argument
   Bertrand Russell
----
Anything you're good at contributes to happiness
   Bertrand Russell
----
Religions, which condemn the pleasures of sense, drive men to seek the pleasures of power. Throughout history power has been the vice of the ascetic.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Many a man will have the courage to die gallantly, but will not have the courage to say, or even to think, that the cause for which he is asked to die is an unworthy one
   Bertrand Russell
----
To be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness.
   Bertrand Russell
----
The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so.
   Bertrand Russell
----
It is possible that mankind is on the threshold of a golden age; but, if so, it will be necessary first to slay the dragon that guards the door, and this dragon is religion
   Bertrand Russell
----
The demand for certainty is one which is natural to man, but is nevertheless an intellectual vice
   Bertrand Russell
----
I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Collective fear stimulates herd instinct, and tends to produce ferocity toward those who are not regarded as members of the herd.
   Bertrand Russell
----
A hallucination is a fact, not an error; what is erroneous is a judgment based upon it.
   Bertrand Russell
----
The secret to happiness is to face the fact that the world is horrible
   Bertrand Russell
----
A happy life must be to a great extent a quiet life, for it is only in an atmosphere of quiet that true joy dare live
   Bertrand Russell
----
The only thing that will redeem mankind is cooperation.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Contempt for happiness is usually contempt for other people's happiness, and is an elegant disguise for hatred of the human race
   Bertrand Russell
----
What is wanted is not the will to believe, but the wish to find out, which is its exact opposite
   Bertrand Russell
----
The most savage controversies are about matters as to which there is no good evidence either way
   Bertrand Russell
----
The infliction of cruelty with a good conscience is a delight to moralists. That is why they invented Hell.
   Bertrand Russell
----
There will still be things that machines cannot do. They will not produce great art or great literature or great philosophy; they will not be able to discover the secret springs of happiness in the human heart; they will know nothing of love and friendship.
   Bertrand Russell
----
One should respect public opinion insofar as is necessary to avoid starvation and keep out of prison, but anything that goes beyond this is voluntary submission to an unnecessary tyranny.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Most people would rather die than think: many do.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Civilized people cannot fully satisfy their sexual instinct without love
   Bertrand Russell
----
The wise man thinks about his troubles only when there is some purpose in doing so; at other times he thinks about other things
   Bertrand Russell
----
Why is propaganda so much more successful when it stirs up hatred than when it tries to stir up friendly feeling?
   Bertrand Russell
----
Sin is geographical.
   Bertrand Russell
----
The most valuable things in life are not measured in monetary terms. The really important things are not houses and lands, stocks and bonds, automobiles and real state, but friendships, trust, confidence, empathy, mercy, love and faith.
   Bertrand Russell
----
This has been my life. I have found it worth living, and would gladly live it again if the chance were offered me.
   Bertrand Russell
----
What men want is not knowledge, but certainty.
   Bertrand Russell
----
All exact science is dominated by the idea of approximation.
   Bertrand Russell
----
When one admits that nothing is certain one must, I think, also add that some things are more nearly certain than others
   Bertrand Russell
----
The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence whatever that it is not utterly absurd.
   Bertrand Russell
----
There is much pleasure to be gained from useless knowledge.
   Bertrand Russell
----
I've made an odd discovery. Every time I talk to a savant I feel quite sure that happiness is no longer a possibility. Yet when I talk with my gardener, I'm convinced of the opposite.
   Bertrand Russell
----
The true spirit of delight, the exaltation, the sense of being more than Man, which is the touchstone of the highest excellence, is to be found in mathematics as surely as in poetry
   Bertrand Russell
----
God is a reality of spirit... He cannot... be conceived as an object, not even as the very highest object. God is not to be found in the world of objects.
   Bertrand Russell
----
More important than the curriculum is the question of the methods of teaching and the spirit in which the teaching is given
   Bertrand Russell
----
To be able to fill leisure intelligently is the last product of civilization, and at present very few people have reached this level.
   Bertrand Russell
----
If you wish to be happy yourself, you must resign yourself to seeing others also happy
   Bertrand Russell
----
I believe in using words, not fists... I believe in my outrage knowing people are living in boxes on the street. I believe in honesty. I believe in a good time. I believe in good food. I believe in sex.
   Bertrand Russell
----
The essence of the Liberal outlook lies not in what opinions are held, but in how they are held: instead of being held dogmatically, they are held tentatively, and with a consciousness that new evidence may at any moment lead to their abandonment.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Thinking you know when in fact you don't is a fatal mistake, to which we are all prone
   Bertrand Russell
----
It's a waste of energy to be angry with a man who behaves badly, just as it is to be angry with a car that won't go
   Bertrand Russell
----
I say quite deliberately that the Christian religion, as organized in its churches, has been and still is the principal enemy of moral progress in the world
   Bertrand Russell
----
What hunger is in relation to food, zest is in relation to life
   Bertrand Russell
----
Happiness is not best achieved by those who seek it directly
   Bertrand Russell
----
It has been said that man is a rational animal. All my life I have been searching for evidence which could support this.
   Bertrand Russell
----
I had supposed until that time that it was quite common for parents to love their children, but the war persuaded me that it is a rare exception. I had supposed that most people liked money better than almost anything else, but I discovered that they liked destruction even better. I had supposed that intellectuals frequently loved truth, but I found here again that not ten per cent of them prefer truth to popularity.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Science can teach us, and I think our own hearts can teach us, no longer to look around for imaginary supports, no longer to invent allies in the sky, but rather to look to our own efforts here below to make this world a fit place to live in, instead
   Bertrand Russell
----
The degree of one's emotions varies inversely with one's knowledge of the facts.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Men who are unhappy, like men who sleep badly, are always proud of the fact
   Bertrand Russell
----
The teacher, like the artist and the philosopher, can perform his work adequately only if he feels himself to be an individual directed by an inner creative impulse, not dominated and fettered by an outside authority.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Science may set limits to knowledge, but should not set limits to imagination.
   Bertrand Russell
----
My first advice on how not to grow old would be to choose you ancestors carefully.
   Bertrand Russell
----
The observer, when he seems to himself to be observing a stone, is really, if physics is to be believed, observing the effects of the stone upon himself.
   Bertrand Russell
----
To be happy in this world, especially when youth is past, it is necessary to feel oneself not merely an isolated individual whose day will soon be over, but part of the stream of life flowing on from the first germ to the remote and unknown future.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Three passions, simple but overwhelmingly strong, have governed my life: the longing for love, the search for knowledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Italy, and the spring and first love all together should suffice to make the gloomiest person happy.
   Bertrand Russell
----
If we were all given by magic power to read each other's thoughts, I suppose the first effect would be to dissolve all friendships
   Bertrand Russell
----
The greatest challenge to any thinker is stating the problem in a way that will allow a solution
   Bertrand Russell
----
You must not kill your neighbor, whom perhaps you genuinely hate, but by a little propaganda this hate can be transferred to some foreign nation, against whom all your murderous impulses become patriotic heroism
   Bertrand Russell
----
Right discipline consists, not in external compulsion, but in the habits of mind which lead spontaneously to desirable rather than undesirable activities.
   Bertrand Russell
----
It is illegal in England to state in print that a wife can and should derive sexual pleasure from intercourse
   Bertrand Russell
----
What a man believes upon grossly insufficient evidence is an index into his desires -- desires of which he himself is often unconscious. If a man is offered a fact which goes against his instincts, he will scrutinize it closely, and unless the evidence is overwhelming, he will refuse to believe it. If, on the other hand, he is offered something which affords a reason for acting in accordance to his instincts, he will accept it even on the slightest evidence. The origin of myths is explained in this way.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Life is a brief, small, and transitory phenomenon in an obscure corner, not at all the sort of thing that one would make a fuss about if one were not personally concerned
   Bertrand Russell
----
None but a coward dares to boast that he has never known fear.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Every advance in civilization has been denounced as unnatural while it was recent
   Bertrand Russell
----
Patriots always talk of dying for their country, and never of killing for their country.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons.
   Bertrand Russell
----
There is no nonsense so arrant that it cannot be made the creed of the vast majority by adequate governmental action
   Bertrand Russell
----
No one gossips about other people's secret virtues.
   Bertrand Russell
----
We have, in fact, two kinds of morality side by side; one which we preach but do not practice, and another which we practice but seldom preach.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Democracy is the process by which people choose the man who'll get the blame.
   Bertrand Russell
----
To teach how to live without certainty, and yet without, being paralyzed by hesitation, is perhaps the chief thing that philosophy in our age can do for those who study it
   Bertrand Russell
----
All who are not lunatics are agreed about certain things : That it is better to be alive than dead, better to be adequately fed than starved, better to be free than a slave
   Bertrand Russell
----
Machines are worshipped because they are beautiful, and valued because they confer power; they are hated because they are hideous, and loathed because they impose slavery
   Bertrand Russell
----
By self-interest, Man has become gregarious, but in instinct he has remained to a great extent solitary; hence the need of religion and morality to reinforce self-interest
   Bertrand Russell
----
The most savage controversies are those about matters as to which there is no good evidence either way. Persecution is used in theology, not in arithmetic.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Advocates of capitalism are very apt to appeal to the sacred principles of liberty, which are embodied in one maxim: The fortunate must not be restrained in the exercise of tyranny over the unfortunate
   Bertrand Russell
----
A life without adventure is likely to be unsatisfying, but a life in which adventure is allowed to take whatever form it will is sure to be short.
   Bertrand Russell
----
The secret of happiness is this: let your interests be as wide as possible, and let your reactions to the things and persons that interest you be as far as possible friendly rather than hostile.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Ethics is in origin the art of recommending to others the sacrifices required for cooperation with oneself.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Unless a man has been taught what to do with success after getting it, the achievement of it must inevitably leave him a prey to boredom.
   Bertrand Russell
----
The three main extra-rational activities in modern life are religion, war, and love; all these are extra-rational, but love is not anti-rational, that is to say, a reasonable man may reasonably rejoice in its existence
   Bertrand Russell
----
Mathematics is the only science where one never knows what one is talking about nor whether what is said is true
   Bertrand Russell
----
By religion I mean a set of beliefs held as dogmas, dominating the conduct of life, going beyond or contrary to evidence, and inculcated by methods which are emotional or authoritarian, not intellectual
   Bertrand Russell
----
Mathematics, rightly viewed, posses not only truth, but supreme beauty; a beauty cold and austere, like that of sculpture
   Bertrand Russell
----
Every man, wherever he goes, is encompassed by a cloud of comforting convictions which move with him like flies on a summer day
   Bertrand Russell
----
Few people can be happy unless they hate some other person, nation, or creed
   Bertrand Russell
----
I do not pretend that birth control is the only way in which population can be kept from increasing. There are others, which, one must suppose, opponents of birth control would prefer.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Law in origin was merely a codification of the power of dominant groups, and did not aim at anything that to a modern man would appear to be justice
   Bertrand Russell
----
I like mathematics because it is not human and has nothing particular to do with this planet or with the whole accidental universe - because, like Spinoza's God, it won't love us in return.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Human life, its growth, its hopes, fears, loves, et cetera, are the result of accidents
   Bertrand Russell
----
I am not myself in any degree ashamed of having changed my opinions
   Bertrand Russell
----
Even when the experts all agree, they may well be mistaken.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Throughout the long period of religious doubt, I had been rendered very unhappy by the gradual loss of belief, but when the process was completed, I found to my surprise that I was quite glad to be done with the whole subject
   Bertrand Russell
----
The qualities most needed are charity and tolerance, not some form of fanatical faith such as is offered to us by the various rampant isms
   Bertrand Russell
----
In order to be happy we require all kinds of supports to our self-esteem. We are human beings, therefore human beings are the purpose of god's creation
   Bertrand Russell
----
There's a Bible on the shelf there. But I keep it next to Voltaire-poison and antidote.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Aristotle maintained that women have fewer teeth than men; although he was twice married, it never occurred to him to verify this statement by examining his wives' mouths.
   Bertrand Russell
----
For my part I distrust all generalizations about women, favorable and unfavorable, masculine and feminine, ancient and modern; all alike, I should say, result from paucity of experience.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Most political leaders acquire their position by causing large numbers of people to believe that these leaders are actuated by altruistic desires
   Bertrand Russell
----
Drunkenness is temporary suicide: the happiness that it brings is merely negative, a momentary cessation of unhappiness
   Bertrand Russell
----
I've always thought respectable people scoundrels, and I look anxiously at my face every morning for signs of my becoming a scoundrel.
   Bertrand Russell
----
We must care about the world of our children and grandchildren, a world we may never see.
   Bertrand Russell
----
Doing linear scans over an associative array is like trying to club someone to death with a loaded Uzi
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
For me, writing is a love-hate relationship.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
Hubris itself will not let you be an artist.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
I am not a sort of person who wants to run a company.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
I still drive my 1977 Honda Accord. The paint is almost all worn off. It's still running.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
I take time to watch anime. I don't know whether I'm allowed to, but I do it anyway.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
I talked about becoming stupid, but I've always been stupid. Fortunately I've been just smart enough to realize that I'm stupid.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
I think computer science, by and large, is still stuck in the Modern age.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
I think operating systems work best if they're free and open. Particular applications are more likely to be proprietary.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
I think software patents are a bad idea. Many patents are given for trivial inventions.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
I think the way IBM has embraced the open source philosophy has been quite astonishing, but gratifying. I hope they'll do very well with it.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
I want people to use Perl. I want to be a positive ingredient of the world and make my American history. So, whatever it takes to give away my software and get it used, that's great.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
I'm just paid to do whatever I want to do. Some of the time it's development, and some of the time it's just goofing off.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
I'm never satisfied because I've been always interested in too many things and I always want to do everything at once.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
If any ideology is so serious that you can't have fun while you're doing it, it's probably too serious.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
If you're a large corporation, you can afford to pay the money to register patents, but if you're an individual like me, you can't.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
Many days I don't write any code at all, and some days I spend all day writing code.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
One of the very basic ideas of Post-Modernism is rejection of arbitrary power structures. Different people are sensitive to different kinds of power structures.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
Perl was designed to work more like a natural language. It's a little more complicated but there are more shortcuts, and once you learned the language, it's more expressive.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
Post-Modernism was a reaction against Modernism. It came quite early to music and literature, and a little later to architecture. And I think it's still coming to computer science.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
Programmers can be lazy.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
Some of modern engineering is necessary to good art. But I think of myself is a cultural artist.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
Somebody out there is going to do something that's far more surprising than anything that I would do. I was surprised by the whole web thing in the first place.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
The Harvard Law states: Under controlled conditions of light, temperature, humidity, and nutrition, the organism will do as it damn well pleases.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
The problems that I really like to solve are our cultural problems.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
The three chief virtues of a programmer are: Laziness, Impatience and Hubris.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
The world has become a larger place. The universe has been expanding, and Perl's been expanding along with the universe.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
There is no schedule. We are all volunteers, so we get it done when we get it done. Perl 5 still works fine, and we plan to take the right amount of time on Perl 6.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
To be a good artist, you have to serve the work of art and allow it to be what it is supposed to be.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
We all agree on the necessity of compromise. We just can't agree on when it's necessary to compromise.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
We are so Post-Modern that we don't realize how Post-Modern we are anymore.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
When I announced the development of Perl 6, I said it was going to be a community design. I designed Perl, myself. It's limited by my own brain power. So I wanted Perl 6 to be a community design.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
Younger hackers are hard to classify. They're probably just as diverse as the old hackers are. We're all over the map.
   Larry Wall, http://linuxshellaccount.blogspot.com/2009/01/quotes-from-larry-wall-unix-and-linux.html
----
He who lives by the sword, die by the sword
   The way of the warrior
----
Next to being married, a girl likes to be crossed in love a little now and then.
   Jane Austen
----
Pretend inferiority and encourage his arrogance.
   Sun Tzu
----
Regard your soldiers as your children, and they will follow you into the deepest valleys; look on them as your own beloved sons, and they will stand by you even unto death.
   Sun Tzu
----
Opportunities multiply as they are seized.
   Sun Tzu
----
Supreme excellence consists in breaking the enemy's resistance without fighting.
   Sun Tzu
----
War is based on deception.
   Sun Tzu
----
The art of war teaches us to rely not on the likelihood of the enemy's not coming, but on our own readiness to receive him; not on the chance of his not attacking, but rather on the fact that we have made our position unassailable.
   Sun Tzu
----
Strategy without tactics is the slowest route to victory. Tactics without strategy is the noise before defeat.
   Sun Tzu
----
You have to believe in yourself.
   Sun Tzu
----
Let your plans be dark and as impenetrable as night, and when you move, fall like a thunderbolt.
   Sun Tzu
----
Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win.
   Sun Tzu
----
If you know the enemy and know yourself you need not fear the results of a hundred battles.
   Sun Tzu
----
Can you imagine what I would do if I could do all I can?
   Sun Tzu
----
Know thy self, know thy enemy. A thousand battles, a thousand victories.
   Sun Tzu
----
Be extremely subtle, even to the point of formlessness. Be extremely mysterious, even to the point of soundlessness. Thereby you can be the director of the opponent's fate.
   Sun Tzu
----
Invincibility lies in the defence; the possibility of victory in the Attack.
   Sun Tzu
----
Prohibit the taking of omens, and do away with superstitious doubts. Then, until death itself comes, no calamity need be feared.
   Sun Tzu
----
If you are far from the enemy, make him believe you are near.
   Sun Tzu
----
The good fighters of old first put themselves beyond the possibility of defeat, and then waited for an opportunity of defeating the enemy.
   Sun Tzu
----
Thus, what is of supreme importance in war is to attack the enemy's strategy.
   Sun Tzu
----
For to win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill.
   Sun Tzu
----
There has never been a protracted war from which a country has benefited.
   Sun Tzu
----
All warfare is based on deception. Hence, when able to attack, we must seem unable; when using our forces, we must seem inactive; when we are near, we must make the enemy believe we are far away; when far away, we must make him believe we are near.
   Sun Tzu
----
All war is deception.
   Sun Tzu
----
The one who figures on victory at headquarters before even doing battle is the one who has the most strategic factors on his side.
   Sun Tzu
----
If you know the enemy and know yourself, your victory will not stand in doubt; if you know Heaven and know Earth, you may make your victory complete.
   Sun Tzu
----
The opportunity to secure ourselves against defeat lies in our own hands, but the opportunity of defeating the enemy is provided by the enemy himself.
   Sun Tzu
----
He who knows when he can fight and when he cannot, will be victorious.
   Sun Tzu
----
For them to perceive the advantage of defeating the enemy, they must also have their rewards.
   Sun Tzu
----
Confront them with annihilation, and they will then survive; plunge them into a deadly situation, and they will then live. When people fall into danger, they are then able to strive for victory.
   Sun Tzu
----
He who is prudent and lies in wait for an enemy who is not, will be victorious.
   Sun Tzu
----
If ignorant both of your enemy and yourself, you are certain to be in peril.
   Sun Tzu
----
All men can see these tactics whereby I conquer, but what none can see is the strategy out of which victory is evolved.
   Sun Tzu
----
The skilful employer of men will employ the wise man, the brave man, the covetous man, and the stupid man.
   Sun Tzu
----
In the practical art of war, the best thing of all is to take the enemy's country whole and intact; to shatter and destroy it is not so good.
   Sun Tzu
----
There is no instance of a nation benefiting from prolonged warfare.
   Sun Tzu
----
Thus it is that in war the victorious strategist only seeks battle after the victory has been won, whereas he who is destined to defeat first fights and afterwards looks for victory.
   Sun Tzu
----
The enlightened ruler is heedful, and the good general full of caution.
   Sun Tzu
----
Secret operations are essential in war; upon them the army relies to make its every move.
   Sun Tzu
----
Hence that general is skilful in attack whose opponent does not know what to defend; and he is skilful in defense whose opponent does not know what to attack.
   Sun Tzu
----
The general who wins the battle makes many calculations in his temple before the battle is fought. The general who loses makes but few calculations beforehand.
   Sun Tzu
----
Do not press an enemy at bay.
   Sun Tzu
----
The skillful leader subdues the enemy's troops without any fighting; he captures their cities without laying siege to them; he overthrows their kingdom without lengthy operations in the field. With his forces intact he disputes the mastery of the emp
   Sun Tzu
----
A kingdom that has once been destroyed can never come again into being; nor can the dead ever be brought back to life.
   Sun Tzu
----
A wise general makes a point of foraging of the enemy.
   Sun Tzu
----
When envoys are sent with compliments in their mouths, it is a sign that the enemy wishes for a truce.
   Sun Tzu
----
The art of giving orders is not to try to rectify the minor blunders and not to be swayed by petty doubts.
   Sun Tzu
----
So there are five ways of knowing who will win. Those who know when to fight and when not to fight are victorious. Those who discern when to use many or few troops are victorious. Those whose upper and lower ranks have the same desire are victorious.
   Sun Tzu
----
It is essential to seek out enemy agents who have come to conduct espionage against you and to bribe them to serve you. Give them instructions and care for them. Thus doubled agents are recruited and used.
   Sun Tzu
----
defeat the enemies strategy
   Sun Tzu
----
The quality of decision is like the well-timed swoop of a falcon which enables it to strike and destroy its victim.
   Sun Tzu
----
O divine art of subtlety and secrecy! Through you we learn to be invisible, through you inaudible and hence we can hold the enemy's fate in our hands.
   Sun Tzu
----
There are not more than five musical notes, yet the combinations of these five give rise to more melodies than can ever be heard.
   Sun Tzu
----
Now the reason the enlightened prince and the wise general conquer the enemy whenever they move and their achievements surpass those of ordinary men is foreknowledge.
   Sun Tzu
----
If our soldiers are not overburdened with money, it is not because they have a distaste for riches; if their lives are not unduly long, it is not because they are disinclined to longevity.
   Sun Tzu
----
The general who advances without coveting fame and retreats without fearing disgrace, whose only thought is to protect his country and do good service for his sovereign, is the jewel of the kingdom.
   Sun Tzu
----
The ultimate in disposing one's troops is to be without ascertainable shape. Then the most penetrating spies cannot pry in nor can the wise lay plans against you.
   Sun Tzu
----
So the important thing in a military operation is victory, not persistence.
   Sun Tzu
----
To perceive victory when it is known to all is not really skilful. Everyone calls victory in battle good, but it is not really good.
   Sun Tzu
----
In peace prepare for war, in war prepare for peace. The art of war is of vital importance to the state. It is matter of life and death, a road either to safety or to ruin. Hence under no circumstances can it be neglected.
   Sun Tzu
----
It is imperative to contest all factions for complete victory, so the army is not garrisoned and the profit can be total. This is the law of strategic siege.
   Sun Tzu
----
The best victory is when the opponent surrenders of its own accord before there are any actual hostilities...It is best to win without fighting.
   Sun Tzu
----
Therefore a victorious army first wins and then seeks battle; a defeated army first battles and then seeks victory.
   Sun Tzu
----
According to my assessment, even if you have many more troops than others, how can that help you to victory?
   Sun Tzu
----
Of all those in the army close to the commander none is more intimate than the secret agent; of all rewards none more liberal than those given to secret agents; of all matters none is more confidential than those relating to secret operations.
   Sun Tzu
----
If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight, even though the ruler forbid it; if fighting will not result is victory, then you must not fight, even at the ruler's bidding.
   Sun Tzu
----
The proximity of an army causes prices to go up; and high prices cause people's substance to be drained away. When their substance is drained away, they will be afflicted by heavy exactions. With this loss of substance and exhaustion of strength, the homes of the people will be stripped bare, and their incomes dissipated.
   Sun Tzu
----
One who sets the entire army in motion to chase an advantage will not attain it.
   Sun Tzu
----
Unhappy is the fate of one who tries to win his battles and succeed in his attacks without cultivating the spirit of enterprise, for the result is waste of time and general stagnation.
   Sun Tzu
----
The clever combatant imposes his will on the enemy, but does not allow the enemy's will to be imposed on him.
   Sun Tzu
----
I know why it has the name "C" and "C++" for the languages: It's the grade of the language...
   Ido Kanner
----
Tardiness often robs us opportunity, and the dispatch of our forces.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
There is nothing more difficult to take in hand, more perilous to conduct or more uncertain in its success than to take the lead in the introduction of a new order of things.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Hatred is gained as much by good works as by evil.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Before all else, be armed.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
The more sand that has escaped from the hourglass of our life, the clearer we should see through it.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
There are three kinds of intelligence: one kind understands things for itself, the other appreciates what others can understand, the third understands neither for itself nor through others. This first kind is excellent, the second good, and the third kind useless.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Whosoever desires constant success must change his conduct with the times.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Men shrink less from offending one who inspires love than one who inspires fear.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
He who wishes to be obeyed must know how to command.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
There is no surer sign of decay in a country than to see the rites of religion held in contempt
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
So long as the great majority of men are not deprived of either property or honor, they are satisfied
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
And here comes in the question whether it is better to be loved rather than feared, or feared rather than loved. It might perhaps be answered that we should wish to be both; but since love and fear can hardly exist together, if we must choose between them, it is far safer to be feared than loved....I sum up by saying that since his being loved depends upon his subjects, while his being feared depends upon himself, [one] should build on what is his own, and not on what rests with others.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Men in general judge more from appearances than from reality. All men have eyes, but few have the gift of penetration
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
For as laws are necessary that good manners be preserved, so there is need of good manners that law may be maintained
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
War is just when it is necessary; arms are permissible when there is no hope except in arms.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Entrepreneurs are simply those who understand that there is little difference between obstacle and opportunity and are able to turn both to their advantage.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Men in general judge more by the sense of sight than by the sense of touch, because everyone can see, but only a few can test by feeling. Everyone sees what you seem to be, few know what you really are, and those few do not dare take a stand against the general opinion.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Of mankind we may say in general they are fickle, hypocritical, and greedy of gain.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
There is no avoiding war; it can only be postponed to the advantage of others.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
One who deceives will always find those who allow themselves to be deceived.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
The promise given was a necessity of the past: the word broken is a necessity of the present.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
God is not willing to do everything, and thus take away our free will and that share of glory which belongs to us
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
I'm not interested in preserving the status quo; I want to overthrow it.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Never was anything great achieved without danger
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Politics have no relation to morals.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
There is nothing more difficult to carry out, nor more doubtful of success, nor more dangerous to handle, that to institute a new order of things
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Men are so simple and so much inclined to obey immediate needs that a deceiver will never lack victims for his deceptions
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
If an injury has to be done to a man it should be so severe that his vengeance need not be feared
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
A prince must imitate the fox and the lion, for the lion cannot protect himself from traps, and the fox cannot defend himself from wolves. One must therefore be a fox to recognize traps, and a lion to frighten wolves. Those that wish to be only lions do not understand this. Therefore, a prudent ruler ought not to keep faith when by so doing it would be against his interest, and when the reasons which made him bind himself no longer exist. If men were all good, this precept would not be a good one; but as they are bad, and would not observe their faith with you, so you are not bound to keep faith with them.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
It is not titles that honor men, but men that honor titles.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
The question is, then, do we try to make things easy on ourselves or do we try to make things easy on our customers, whoever they may be?
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
And if, to be sure, sometimes you need to conceal a fact with words, do it in such a way that it does not become known, or, if it does become known, that you have a ready and quick defense
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Where the willingness is great the difficulties cannot be great
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
The new ruler must determine all the injuries that he will need to inflict. He must inflict them once and for all.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
A wise ruler ought never to keep faith when by doing so it would be against his interests.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Men should be either treated generously or destroyed, because they take revenge for slight injuries - for heavy ones they cannot
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Princes and governments are far more dangerous than other elements within society.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
No enterprise is more likely to succeed than one concealed from the enemy until it is ripe for execution.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
It is necessary for him who lays out a state and arranges laws for it to presuppose that all men are evil and that they are always going to act according to the wickedness of their spirits whenever they have free scope
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Hence it comes about that all armed prophets have been victorious, and all unarmed prophets have been destroyed.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
The wish to acquire more is admittedly a very natural and common thing; and when men succeed in this they are always praised rather than condemned. But when they lack the ability to do so and yet want to acquire more at all costs, they deserve condemnation for their mistakes.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Benefits should be conferred gradually; and in that way they will taste better
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Men are more apt to be mistaken in their generalizations than in their particular observations.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Men rise from one ambition to another: first, they seek to secure themselves against attack, and then they attack others.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
The one who adapts his policy to the times prospers, and likewise that the one whose policy clashes with the demands of the times does not.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Severities should be dealt out all at once, so that their suddenness may give less offense; benefits ought to be handed ought drop by drop, so that they may be relished the more.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
We cannot attribute to fortune or virtue that which is achieved without either.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
War should be the only study of a prince. He should consider peace only as a breathing-time, which gives him leisure to contrive, and furnishes as ability to execute, military plans.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
The fact is that a man who wants to act virtuously in every way necessarily comes to grief among so many who are not virtuous.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
A return to first principles in a republic is sometimes caused by the simple virtues of one man. His good example has such an influence that the good men strive to imitate him, and the wicked are ashamed to lead a life so contrary to his example.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
A prince never lacks legitimate reasons to break his promise
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
It is better to be bold than too circumspect, because fortune is of a sex which likes not a tardy wooer and repulses all who are not ardent
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Men sooner forget the death of their father than the loss of their patrimony.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
A wise man will see to it that his acts always seem voluntary and not done by compulsion, however much he may be compelled by necessity.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
There is no other way for securing yourself against flatteries except that men understand that they do not offend you by telling you the truth; but when everybody can tell you the truth, you fail to get respect
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
Men nearly always follow the tracks made by others and proceed in their affairs by imitation, even though they cannot entirely keep to the tracks of others or emulate the prowess of their models. So a prudent man should always follow in the footsteps of great men and imitate those who have been outstanding. If his own prowess fails to compare with theirs, at least it has an air of greatness about it. He should behave like those archers who, if they are skilful, when the target seems too distant, know the capabilities of their bow and aim a good deal higher than their objective, not in order to shoot so high but so that by aiming high they can reach the target.
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
For the great majority of mankind are satisfied with appearance, as though they were realities and are often more influenced by the things that seem than by those that are
   Niccolo Machiavelli
----
According to Jim the sequence of Blob creation is as follows:
1. Barry Robinson, my boss at DEC, was prone to wandering around muttering "blobs, blobs, we gotta have blobs." When I asked what a blob was, he pointed out that I was the architect and that was my job.
   Seen at http://www.ibphoenix.com/main.nfs?page=ibp_blobs
----
According to Jim the sequence of Blob creation is as follows:
4. The retired bouncer hired to head the DSRI process rules that blobs were in, but had to be renamed "segmented strings" to avoid offending Clevelandites (or whatever).
   Seen at http://www.ibphoenix.com/main.nfs?page=ibp_blobs
----
According to Jim the sequence of Blob creation is as follows:
5. Much later, Terry McKiever, an Apollo marketing gnome, fell in love with the concept of blob, but felt the blob needed to be an acronym. She started calling them "basic large objects." Apollo never private labelled the product, so this should be irrelevant. Unfortunately, her ravings got the attention of Informix (I think) who announced that they would support "binary large objects" at some future time. The damage was done.
   Seen at http://www.ibphoenix.com/main.nfs?page=ibp_blobs
----
Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.
   Epicurus
----
Living with integrity means: Not settling for less than what you know you deserve in your relationships. Asking for what you want and need from others. Speaking your truth, even though it might create conflict or tension. Behaving in ways that are in harmony with your personal values. Making choices based on what you believe, and not what others believe.
   Barbara De Angelis
----
If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together.. there is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. but the most important thing is, even if we're apart.. i'll always be with you.
   Winnie the Pooh
----
The folks you help won't remember it and the folks you hurt won't ever forget it.
   Bill Clayton
----
When we're incomplete, we're always searching for somebody to complete us. When, after a few years or a few months of a relationship, we find that we're still unfulfilled, we blame our partners and take up with somebody more promising. This can go on and on--series polygamy--until we admit that while a partner can add sweet dimensions to our lives, we, each of us, are responsible for our own fulfillment. Nobody else can provide it for us, and to believe otherwise is to delude ourselves dangerously and to program for eventual failure every relationship we enter.
   Tom Robbins
----
Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity.
   Albert Einstein
----
We used to think that if we knew one, we knew two, because one and one are two. We are finding that we must learn a great deal more about 'and.'
   Sir Arthur Eddington
----
Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it.
   Swedish Proverb
----
As pascal shows, something proven is often better as some hype ;)
   Florian Klaempfl, seen at http://www.mail-archive.com/fpc-other@lists.freepascal.org/msg00209.html
----
With risk there may be change; with change there must always be risk.
   Dale Wyllie
----
You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.
   Buddha
----
Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
   Jalal ad-Din Rumi
----
Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.
   Benjamin Spock
----
Courage consists in the power of self-recovery.
   Ralph Waldo Emerson
----
You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.
   Brian Tracy
----
Only the shallow know themselves.
   Oscar Wilde
----
I don't at all like knowing what people say of me behind my back. It makes me far too conceited.
   Oscar Wilde
----
You never find yourself until you face the truth
   Pearl Bailey
----
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
   Earl Wilson
----
You cannot hate other people without hating your self
   Oprah Winfrey
----
Write to be understood, speak to be heard, read to grow...
   Lawrence Clark Powell
----
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose
   George Carlin
----
Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving.
   Dale Carnegie
----
With self-discipline most anything is possible.
   Theodore Roosevelt
----
Self-worth comes from one thing -- thinking that you are worthy.
   Wayne Dyer
----
All of the significant battles are waged within the self
   Sheldon Kopp
----
Good government is no substitute for self-government
   Mahatma Gandhi
----
I am, indeed, a king, because I know how to rule myself.
   Pietro Aretino
----
The surest aid in combating the male's disease of self-contempt is to be loved by a clever woman.
   Friedrich Nietzsche
----
I am afraid to show you who I really am, because if I show you who I really am, you might not like it--and that's all I got.
   Sabrina Ward Harrison
----
People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself. But the self is not something one finds, it is something one creates.
   Thomas S. Szasz
----
A man should first direct himself in the way he should go. Only then should he instruct others.
   Buddha
----
Self-disciplined begins with the mastery of your thoughts. If you don't control what you think, you can't control what you do. Simply, self-discipline enables you to think first and act afterward.
   Napoleon Hill
----
People love others not for who they are but for how they make them feel
   Irwin Federman
----
They cannot take away our self-respect if we do not give it to them.
   Mahatma Gandhi
----
Be yourself, don't take anyone's shit, and never let them take you alive.
   Gerard Way
----
We talk of choosing our friends, but friends are self-elected
   Ralph Waldo Emerson
----
I have been a selfish being all my life, in practice, though not in principle.
   Jane Austen
----
Which painting in the National Gallery would I save if there was a fire? The one nearest the door of course.
   George Bernard Shaw
----
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go
   Oscar Wilde
----
How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.
   Oscar Wilde
----
Not all those who wander are lost.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
There is nothing like looking, if you want to find something. You certainly usually find something, if you look, but it is not always quite the something you were after.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
You can only come to the morning through the shadows.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Fair speech may hide a foul heart.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
The Road goes ever on and on down from the door where it began. Now far ahead the Road has gone, and I must follow, if I can, pursuing it with eager feet, until it joins some larger way where many paths and errands meet. And whither then? I cannot say.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them? Then do not be too eager to deal out death in judgement. For even the very wise cannot see all ends.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
It is a dangerous business going out your front door.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
It is the job that is never started that takes longest to finish.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
The wise speak only of what they know.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Courage is found in unlikely places.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
I have no help to send, therefore I must go myself.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
A star shone at the hour of our meeting.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Remember what Bilbo used to say: It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
There are many powers in the world, for good or for evil. Some are greater than I am. Against some I have not yet been measured. But my time is coming.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
All that is gold does not glitter, not all those who wander are lost; the old that is strong does not wither, deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, a light from the shadows shall spring; renenwed shall be blade that was broken, the crownless again shall be king.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
I do not love the bright sword for it's sharpness, nor the arrow for it's swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Let him not vow to walk in the dark, who has not seen the darkness fall.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
It needs but one foe to breed a war, and those who have not swords can still die upon them
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
He who breaks a thing to find out what it is, has left the path of wisdom.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
What do you mean? Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good on this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
But that's not the way of it with the tales that really mattered, or the ones that stay in the mind. Folk seem to have just landed in them, usually - their paths were laid that way, as you put it. But I expect they had lots of chances, like us, of turning back, only they didn't. And if they had, we shouldn't know, because they'd have been forgotten. We hear about those as just went on - and not all to a good end, mind you; at least not to what folk inside a story and not outside it call a good end
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
I wish life was not so short, he thought. languages take such a time, and so do all the things one wants to know about.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Some who have read the book, or at any rate have reviewed it, have found it boring, absurd, or contemptible; and I have no cause to complain, since I have similar opinions of their works, or of the kinds of writing that they evidently prefer.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
So comes snow after fire, and even dragons have their ending.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
The wolf that one hears is worse than the orc that one fears.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
What do you fear my lady?
A cage. To stay behind bars until use and old age accept them and all chance of valor has gone beyond beyond recall or desire.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
N-nothing important. That is, I heard a good deal about a ring, and a dark lord, and something about the end of the world, but please, Mr. Gandalf, sir, don't hurt me. Don't turn me into anything... unnatural.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Do not meddle in the affairs of Wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Lord Denethor is Boromir's father. To bring him news of his beloved son's death would be most unwise. And don't mention Frodo or the ring. And say nothing of Aragorn either. In fact, it's best if you don't speak at all, Peregrin Took.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Aragorn: Hold your ground, hold your ground. Sons of Gondor, of Rohan, my brothers. I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me. A day may come when the courage of men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship, but it is not this day. An hour of wolves and shattered shields, when the age of men comes crashing down, but it is not this day. This day we fight! By all that you hold dear on this good Earth, I bid you *stand, Men of the West!*
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Fealty with love, Valor with honor, oathbreaking with vengeance.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them
One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
That is Shadowfax. He is cheif of the Maeras, lords of all horses, and not even Theoden, King of Rohan, has ever looked on a better. Does he not shine like silver, and run as smoothly as a swift stream?
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Everything to me that is the most important, and the most moving in the book, they've gotten on the stage.
   Rachel Tolkien
----
It's wisdom to recognize necessity, when all other courses have been weighed, though as folly it may appear to those who cling to false hope.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
It must often be so, Sam, when things are in danger: someone has to give them up, lose them, so that others may keep them.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
The world is full enough of hurts and mischance without wars to multiply them.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
hope is not victory
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
The wide world is all about you; you can fence yourselves in, but you cannot forever fence it out.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Still round the corner there may wait, A new road or a secret gate.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
He should not vow to walk in the dark, who has not seen the nightfall.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
It's like things are in the world. Hopes fail. An end comes. We have only a little time to wait now.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
She should not die, so young and beautiful. At least, she should not die alone.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
But that's not the way of it with the tales that really mattered, or the ones that stay in the mind. Folk seem to have just landed in them, usually - their paths were laid that way, as you put it. But I expect they had lots of chances, like us, of turning back, only they didn't. And if they had, we shouldn't know, because they'd have been forgotten. We hear about those as just went on - and not all to a good end, mind you; at least not to what folk inside a story and not outside it call a good end
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Then suddenly out of the gloom came a sharp hiss. 'What has it got in its pocketses?'
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
And it is not always good to be healed in body. Nor is it always evil to die in battle, even in bitter pain. Were I permitted, in this dark hour I would choose the latter.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
A box without hinges, key, or lid, yet golden treasure inside is hid.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
Now is the hour come, Riders of the Mark, sons of Eorl! Foes and fires are before you, and your homes far behind. Yet, though you fight upon an alien field, the glory that you reap there shall be your own forever. Oaths ye have taken: now fulfil them all, to lord and land and league of friendship!
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
I am told that I talk in shorthand and then smudge it.
   J.R.R. Tolkien
----
I think we dream so we don't have to be apart so long. If we're in each other's dreams, we can be together all the time.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
We're so busy watching out for what's just ahead of us that we don't take time to enjoy where we are.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Who was the first guy that look at a cow and said," I think that I'll drink whatever comes out of those things when I squeeze them?
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Well, remember what you said, because in a day or two, I'll have a witty and blistering retort! You'll be devastated THEN!
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
I can't tell if that's funny or really scary.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Life is like topography, Hobbes. There are summits of happiness and success, flat stretches of boring routine, and valleys of frustration and failure.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
You can't just turn on creativity like a faucet. You have to be in the right mood.
What mood is that?
Last-minute panic.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Careful. We don't want to learn from this.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
County library? Reference desk, please. Hello? Yes, I need a word definition. Well, that's the problem. I don't know how to spell it and I'm not allowed to say it. Could you just rattle off all the swear words you know and I'll stop you when...Hello?
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
What fun is it being cool if you can't wear a sombrero?
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Girls are like slugs. They serve some purpose but it's hard to imagine what.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
"I've been thinking Hobbes --"
"On a weekend?"
"Well, it wasn't on purpose..."
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Dad, how do soldiers killing each other solve the world's problems?
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Do you think there is a God? ... Well, somebody's out to get me.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Don't walk away! I'm trying to apologize you dumb noodleloaf!
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Talking with you is sort of the conversational equivalent of an out of body experience.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
I wonder if I can grow fangs when my baby teeth fall out.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Unfortunately for my report, mom caught me and I didn't get to see how it ended.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Maybe then I can finish my book.
   Calvin & Hobbes
----
Success and failure are both difficult to endure. Along with success come drugs, divorce, fornication, bullying, travel, meditation, medication, depression, neurosis and suicide. With failure comes failure.
   Joseph Heller
----
I had examined myself pretty thoroughly and discovered that I was unfit for military service.
   Joseph Heller
----
Every writer I know has trouble writing.
   Joseph Heller
----
Procastination is the thief of time.
   Joseph Heller
----
I want to keep my dreams, even bad ones, because without them, I might have nothing all night long.
   Joseph Heller
----
He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.
   Joseph Heller
----
The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.
   Joseph Heller
----
When I read something saying I've not done anything as good as "Catch-22" I'm tempted to reply, "Who has?"
   Joseph Heller
----
There was only one catch and that was Catch-22, which specified that a concern for one's own safety in the face of dangers that were real and immediate was the process of a rational mind.
   Joseph Heller
----
When I grow up I want to be a little boy.
   Joseph Heller
----
Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them.
   Joseph Heller
----
He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.
   Joseph Heller
----
He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.
   Joseph Heller
----
Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry.
   Joseph Heller
----
Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't, don't call it destiny; call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.
   Joseph Heller
----
I think in every country that there is at least one executive who is scared of going crazy.
   Joseph Heller
----
But that was war. Just about all he could find in its favor was that it paid well and liberated children from the pernicious influence of their parents.
   Joseph Heller
----
We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist.
   Joseph Heller
----
The Lord gave us farmers two strong hands so we could grab as much as we could with both of them
   Joseph Heller
----
Lots of people who complained about us receiving the MBE received theirs for heroism in the war - for killing people. We received ours for entertaining other people. I'd say we deserve ours more.
   Joseph Heller
----
Rise above principal and do what's right.
   Joseph Heller
----
Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that he could put his finger without delay on any one he wanted to worry about.
   Joseph Heller
----
Peace on earth would mean the end of civilization as we know it.
   Joseph Heller
----
My drawings have been described as pre-intentionalist, meaning that they were finished before the ideas for them had occurred to me. I shall not argue the point.
   Joseph Heller
----
I don't believe in miracles because it's been a long time since we've had any.
   Joseph Heller
----
[(CNN) --] Everyone in my book accuses everyone else of being crazy, ... Frankly, I think the whole society is nuts -- and the question is: What does a sane man do in an insane society?
   Joseph Heller
----
[Catch22] specified that a concern for one's safety ... was the process of a rational mind. Orr was crazy and could be grounded. All he had to do was ask, and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions.
   Joseph Heller
----
A large part of the public sentiment was my own, ... They saw an absurd quality, a mendacious quality in many of our political leaders and business leaders.
   Joseph Heller
----
Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
   Michael Sinz
----
It is practically impossible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
A crash is when your competitor's program dies. When your program dies, it is an 'idiosyncrasy'.
   Guy Kawasaki
----
APL is a mistake, carried through to perfection. It is the language of the future for the programming techniques of the past: it creates a new generation of coding bums.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
Crash programs fail because they are based on theory that, with nine women pregnant, you can get a baby in a month.
   Werner von Braun
----
Don't blame me for the fact that competent programming, as I view it as an intellectual possibility, will be too difficult for 'the average programmer', you must not fall into the trap of rejecting a surgical technique because it is beyond the capabilities of the barber in his shop around the corner.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring aircraft building progress by weight.
   Bill Gates
----
Programming graphics in X is like finding the square root of PI using Roman numerals
   Henry Spencer
----
Copying all or parts of a program is as natural to a programmer as breathing, and as productive. It ought to be as free.
   Richard Stallman
----
I've always said my career is somewhere between children's programming and hard-core porn.
   Gilbert Gottfried
----
Who can afford to do professional work for nothing? What hobbyist can put 3-man years into programming, finding all bugs, documenting his product and distribute for free? The fact is, no one besides us has invested a lot of money in hobby software.
   Bill Gates
----
Object-oriented programming is an exceptionally bad idea which could only have originated in California.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
Low-level programming is good for the programmer's soul.
   John Carmack
----
Programming is not a zero-sum game. Teaching something to a fellow programmer doesn't take it away from you. I'm happy to share what I can, because I'm in it for the love of programming.
   John Carmack
----
They don't watch programs anymore; they watch pieces of programs.
   Carrie Heeter
----
Computer science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
Program testing can be used to show the presence of bugs, but never to show their absence!
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
The question of whether a computer can think is no more interesting than the question of whether a submarine can swim.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
Progress is possible only if we train ourselves to think about programs without thinking of them as pieces of executable code.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
If in physics there's something you don't understand, you can always hide behind the uncharted depths of nature. You can always blame God. You didn't make it so complex yourself. But if your program doesn't work, there is no one to hide behind. You cannot hide behind an obstinate nature. If it doesn't work, you've messed up.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
Don't blame me for the fact that competent programming, as I view it as an intellectual possibility, will be too difficult for 'the average programmer', you must not fall into the trap of rejecting a surgical technique because it is beyond the capabilities of the barber in his shop around the corner.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
APL is a mistake, carried through to perfection. It is the language of the future for the programming techniques of the past: it creates a new generation of coding bums.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
The effort of using machines to mimic the human mind has always struck me as rather silly. I would rather use them to mimic something better.
   Edsger Dijkstra
----
Often people, especially computer engineers, focus on the machines. They think, "By doing this, the machine will run faster. By doing this, the machine will run more effectively. By doing this, the machine will something something something." They are focusing on machines. But in fact we need to focus on humans, on how humans care about doing programming or operating the application of the machines. We are the masters. They are the slaves.
   Yukihiro Matsumoto, creator of Ruby
----
Focused, hard work is the real key to success. Keep your eyes on the goal, and just keep taking the next step towards completing it. If you aren't sure which way to do something, do it both ways and see which works better.
   John Carmack
----
Focus is a matter of deciding what things you're not going to do.
   John Carmack
----
It's nice to have a game that sells a million copies.
   John Carmack
----
Think of what we, and others, are doing as building the largest roller coaster in the world. Rocket science is mythologized out of whack with its difficulty. Nine out of 10 people will fail, but one of us will eventually get through.
   John Carmack
----
Note to self: Pasty-skinned programmers ought not stand in the Mojave desert for multiple hours.
   John Carmack
----
I'd rather have a search engine or a compiler on a deserted island than a game.
   John Carmack
----
The speed of light sucks.
   John Carmack
----
Everybody's saturated with the marketing hype of next-generation consoles. They are wonderful, but the truth is that they are as powerful as a high end PC is right now.
   John Carmack
----
Sony sort of takes this position where, [they say] 'Okay, it's going to be difficult, maybe its going to suck to do this, but the good game developers are going to suck it up and make it work.' There's some truth to that, ... There will be the developers that go ahead and have a miserable time and do get good performance out of some of these multi-core approaches. And Cell is worse than others in some respects, here.
   John Carmack
----
Every program has (at least) two purposes: The one for which it was written and another for which it wasn't.
   Alan Perlis
----
The string is a stark data structure and everywhere it is passed there is much duplication of process. It is a perfect vehicle for hiding information.
   Alan Perlis
----
Don't have good ideas if you aren't willing to be responsible for them.
   Alan Perlis
----
Computer Science is embarrassed by the computer.
   Alan Perlis
----
It goes against the grain of modern education to teach students to program. What fun is there to making plans, acquiring discipline, organizing thoughts, devoting attention to detail, and learning to be self critical.
   Alan Perlis
----
If you have a procedure with 10 parameters, you probably missed some.
   Alan Perlis
----
Fools ignore complexity. Pragmatists suffer it. Some can avoid it. Geniuses remove it.
   Alan Perlis
----
Symmetry is a complexity-reducing concept (co-routines include subroutines); seek it everywhere.
   Alan Perlis
----
We toast the Lisp programmer who pens his thoughts within nests of parentheses.
   Alan Perlis
----
I think it is inevitable that people program poorly. Training will not substantially help matters. We have to learn to live with it.
   Alan Perlis
----
You can measure a programmer's perspective by noting his attitude on the continuing vitality of FORTRAN.
   Alan Perlis
----
In a 5 year period we get one superb programming language - only we can't control when the 5 year period will begin.
   Alan Perlis
----
A picture is worth 10K words - but only those to describe the picture. Hardly any sets of 10K words can be adequately described with pictures.
   Alan Perlis
----
There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third one works.
   Alan Perlis
----
The computing field is always in need of new cliches.
   Alan Perlis
----
If a listener nods his head when you're explaining your program, wake him up.
   Alan Perlis
----
It is easier to write an incorrect program than understand a correct one.
   Alan Perlis
----
A programming language is low level when its programs require attention to the irrelevant.
   Alan Perlis
----
When someone says "I want a programming language in which I need only say what I wish done," give him a lollipop.
   Alan Perlis
----
Lisp programmers know the value of everything and the cost of nothing.
   Alan Perlis, Yale University
----
In computing, turning the obvious into the useful is a living definition of the word "frustration".
   Alan Perlis
----
It is easier to change the specification to fit the program than vice versa.
   Alan Perlis
----
If your computer speaks English, it was probably made in Japan.
   Alan Perlis
----
In software systems it is often the early bird that makes the worm.
   Alan Perlis
----
A year spent in artificial intelligence is enough to make one believe in God.
   Alan Perlis
----
Is it possible that software is not like anything else, that it is meant to be discarded: that the whole point is to always see it as a soap bubble? 
   Alan Perlis
----
Simplicity does not precede complexity, but follows it.
   Alan Perlis
----
The best book on programming for the layman is "Alice in Wonderland"; but that's because it's the best book on anything for the layman.
   Alan Perlis
----
Some programming languages manage to absorb change, but withstand progress.
   Alan Perlis
----
Syntactic sugar causes cancer of the semicolon.
   Alan Perlis
----
Friends show their love - in times of trouble, not in happiness
   Euripides
----
No one is in control of your happiness but you; therefore, you have the power to change anything about yourself or your life that you want to change.
   Barbara De Angelis
----
Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.
   Lao Tzu
----
Don't marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can't live without.
   Dr. James C. Dobson
----
The one thing children wear out faster than shoes is parents.
   John J. Plomp
----
The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present.
   Barbara De Angelis
----
People do not seem to realize that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character.
   Ralph Waldo Emerson
----
Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving.
   Dale Carnegie
----
Success builds character, failure reveals it
   Dave Checkett
----
A man travels the world in search of what he needs and returns home to find it.
   George Moore
----
May you have love that never ends, lots of money and lots of friends. Health be yours, whatever you do and may God send many blessings to you.
   Irish Blessings
----
Always do what you are afraid to do.
   Ralph Waldo Emerson
----
The key to change... is to let go of fear.
   Rosanne Cash
----
Fear of failure must never be a reason not to try something.
   Frederick Smith
----
You don't develop courage by being happy in your relationships everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity.
   Epicurus
----
Whenever you're in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude.
   William James
----
The quality of your life is the quality of your relationships.
   Anthony Robbins
----
The decision to kiss for the first time is the most crucial in any love story. It changes the relationship of two people much more strongly than even the final surrender; because this kiss already has within it that surrender.
   Emil Ludwig
----
I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I was so poor growing up - if I wasn't a boy - I'd have had nothing to play with
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
With me, nothing goes right. My psychiatrist said my wife and I should have sex every night. Now, we'll never see each other!
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I was such an ugly kid - When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
If it wasn't for pick-pockets I'd have no sex life at all.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
My wife was afraid of the dark... then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
girl phoned me the other day and said .... Come on over, there's nobody home. I went over. Nobody was home.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I met the surgeon general - he offered me a cigarette.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
What a dog I got, his favorite bone is in my arm.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I'm so ugly - My father carries around a picture of the kid who came with his wallet
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
My mother never breast-fed me. She told me she liked me as a friend.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
My cousins gay, he went to London only to find out that Big Ben was a clock.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I get no respect. The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I'm so ugly - My mother had morning sickness - After I was born
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I'm so ugly - I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I'd get
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing at me.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
At twenty a man is full of fight and hope. He wants to reform the world. When he is seventy he still wants to reform the world, but he know he can't.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
Life is just a bowl of pits.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
At my age, I'm envious of a stiff wind.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
Men who do things without being told draw the most wages.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
They change the sheets every day... from one bed to another.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I'm taking Viagra and drinking prune juice - I don't know if I'm coming or going.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
Yeah, I know I'm ugly... I said to a bartender, 'Make me a zombie.' He said 'God beat me to it.'
   Rodney Dangerfield
----
It had to be hammered home quite a bit because I didn't see any humour in my life at all.
   Jimmy Carr
----
fans have been writing in asking why the show hasn't made a return. Bosses felt it was the right time.
   Jimmy Carr
----
yambch - Yet Another Mysql Bug that Caused me an Headache
----
I believe cats to be spirits come to earth. A cat, I am sure, could walk on a cloud without coming through.
   Jules Verne
----
Anything one man can imagine, other men can make real
   Jules Verne
----
The sea is everything. It covers seven tenths of the terrestrial globe. Its breath is pure and healthy. It is an immense desert, where man is never lonely, for he feels life stirring on all sides.
   Jules Verne
----
Science, my lad, is made up of mistakes, but they are mistakes which it is useful to make, because they lead little by little to the truth.
   Jules Verne
----
He believed in it, as certain good women believe in the leviathan--by faith, not by reason.
   Jules Verne
----
The resolutions passed at the last meeting produced a great effect out of doors. Timid people took fright at the idea of a shot weighing 20,000 pounds being launched into space; they asked what cannon could ever transmit a sufficient velocity to such a mighty mass.
   Jules Verne
----
We may brave human laws, but we cannot resist natural ones.
   Jules Verne
----
To those who were not familiar with the motions of the moon, they demonstrated that she possesses two distinct motions, the first being that of rotation upon her axis, the second being that of revolution round the earth, accomplishing both together in an equal period of time, that is to say, in twenty-seven and one-third days.
   Jules Verne
----
Ah, pierce me 100 times with your needles fine and I will thank you 100 times, Saint Morphine, you who Aeseulapus has made a God.
   Jules Verne
----
Was I to believe him in earnest in his intention to penetrate to the centre of this massive globe? Had I been listening to the mad speculations of a lunatic, or to the scientific conclusions of a lofty genius? Where did truth stop? Where did error begin?
   Jules Verne
----
Liberty is worth paying for ...
   Jules Verne
----
This forcible abduction, so roughly carried out, was accomplished with the rapidity of lightning. I shivered all over. Whom had we to deal with? No doubt some new sort of pirates, who explored the sea in their own way. Hardly had the narrow panel closed upon me, when I was enveloped in darkness.
   Jules Verne
----
The Nautilus was piercing the water with its sharp spur, after having accomplished nearly ten thousand leagues in three months and a half, a distance greater than the great circle of the earth. Where were we going now, and what was reserved for the future?
   Jules Verne
----
It was all very well for an Englishman like Mr. Fogg to make the tour of the world with a carpet-bag; a lady could not be expected to travel comfortably under such conditions.
   Jules Verne
----
Everybody knows that the great reversed triangle of land, with its base in the north and its apex in the south, which is called India, embraces fourteen hundred thousand square miles, upon which is spread unequally a population of one hundred and eighty millions of souls.
   Jules Verne
----
On the morrow the horizon was covered with clouds- a thick and impenetrable curtain between earth and sky, which unhappily extended as far as the Rocky Mountains. It was a fatality!
   Jules Verne
----
He rose at thirteen minutes to one, and directed his steps towards the large hall, a sumptuous apartment adorned with lavishly-framed paintings. A flunkey handed him an uncut Times, which he proceeded to cut with a skill which betrayed familiarity with this delicate operation.
   Jules Verne
----
We were alone. Where, I could not say, hardly imagine. All was black, and such a dense black that, after some minutes, my eyes had not been able to discern even the faintest glimmer.
   Jules Verne
----
On the 31st of October, at ten o'clock in the morning, the troop disembarked on the quays of Tampa Town; and one may imagine the activity which pervaded that little town, whose population was thus doubled in a single day.
   Jules Verne
----
The way of describing this unlooked-for scene, the history of the patriot ship, told at first so coldly, and the emotion with which this strange man pronounced the last words, the name of the Avenger, the significance of which could not escape me, all impressed itself deeply on my mind. My eyes did not leave the Captain, who, with his hand stretched out to sea, was watching with a glowing eye the glorious wreck.
   Jules Verne
----
It swam crossways in the direction of the Nautilus with great speed, watching us with its enormous staring green eyes. Its eight arms, or rather feet, fixed to its head, that have given the name of cephalopod to these animals, were twice as long as its body, and were twisted like the furies' hair.
   Jules Verne
----
How much further can we go? What are the final frontiers in this quest for travel? Will humankind only be satisfied when journeys into space become readily available and affordable?
   Jules Verne
----
Travel enables us to enrich our lives with new experiences, to enjoy and to be educated, to learn respect for foreign cultures, to establish friendships, and above all to contribute to international cooperation and peace throughout the world.
   Jules Verne
----
It is not so much our friends' help that helps us as the confident knowledge that they will help us.
   Epicurus
----
What's the message in Metallica? There is no message, but if there was a message, it really should be look within yourself, don't listen to me, don't listen to James, don't listen to anybody, look within yourself for the answers.
   Lars Ulrich
----
As long as it says Metallica on the record it's Metallica.
   Lars Ulrich
----
Fascism should more appropriately be called Corporatism because it is a merger of state and corporate power
   Benito Mussolini
----
Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.
   Confucius
----
Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
   Winston Churchill
----
Where there is shouting, there is no true knowledge.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The noblest pleasure is the joy of understanding.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
As a well spent day brings happy sleep, so a life well spent brings happy death.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The eye sees a thing more clearly in dreams than the imagination awake.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
I have been impressed with the urgency of doing. Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Being willing is not enough; we must do.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
There are three classes of people: those who see. Those who see when they are shown. Those who do not see.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The greatest deception men suffer is from their own opinions.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
While I thought that I was learning how to live, I have been learning how to die.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Our life is made by the death of others.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
If you are alone you belong entirely to yourself. If you are accompanied by even one companion you belong only half to yourself, or even less, in proportion to the thoughtlessness of his conduct; and if you have more than one companion you will fall more deeply into the same plight.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Art is never finished, only abandoned.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
A well-spent day brings happy sleep
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Where the spirit does not work with the hand there is no art
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Time stays long enough for anyone who will use it.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
You can have no dominion greater or less than that over yourself.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Iron rusts from disuse; water loses its purity from stagnation ... even so does inaction sap the vigour of the mind.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The depth and strength of a human character are defined by its moral reserves. People reveal themselves completely only when they are thrown out of the customary conditions of their life, for only then do they have to fall back on their reserves.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
It's easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Learning never exhausts the mind
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Nature never breaks her own laws
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Blinding ignorance does mislead us. O! Wretched mortals, open your eyes!
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Water is the driving force of all nature.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
He who is fixed to a star does not change his mind.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
In rivers, the water that you touch is the last of what has passed and the first of that which comes; so with present time.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Beyond a doubt truth bears the same relation to falsehood as light to darkness.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
As every divided kingdom falls, so every mind divided between many studies confounds and saps itself.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Even the richest soil, if left uncultivated will produce the rankest weeds.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
He who does not punish evil commands it to be done.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
You do ill to praise, but worse to censure, what you do not understand
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Iron rusts from disuse, stagnant water loses its purity, and in cold weather becomes frozen, even so does inaction sap the vigors of the mind.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
As a well-spent day brings happy sleep, so life well used brings happy death.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
There shall be wings! If the accomplishment be not for me, 'tis for some other.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
He who wishes to be rich in a day will be hanged in a year
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The human foot is a masterpiece of engineering and a work of art.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The truth of things is the chief nutriment of superior intellects.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
All our knowledge has its origins in our perceptions.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The function of muscle is to pull and not to push, except in the case of the genitals and the tongue.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Who sows virtue reaps honor.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
He who loves practice without theory is like the sailor who boards ship without a rudder and compass and never knows where he may cast.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The smallest feline is a masterpiece.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
I have wasted my hours
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Human subtlety will never devise an invention more beautiful, more simple or more direct than does nature because in her inventions nothing is lacking, and nothing is superfluous.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Life well spent is long.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
People react to fear, not love - they don't teach that in Sunday School, but it's true.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Learning acquired in youth arrests the evil of old age; and if you understand that old age has wisdom for its food, you will so conduct yourself in youth that your old age will not lack for nourishment.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Just as iron rusts from disuse, even so does inaction spoil the intellect.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
He turns not back who is bound to a star
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
I have offended God and mankind because my work didn't reach the quality it should have.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The part always has a tendency to reunite with its whole in order to escape from its imperfection.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Men of lofty genius when they are doing the least work are most active.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Thirst will parch your tongue and your body will waste through lack of sleep ere you can describe in words that which painting instantly sets before the eye
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Every now and then go away, have a little relaxation, for when you come back to your work your judgment will be surer. Go some distance away because then the work appears smaller and more of it can be taken in at a glance and a lack of harmony and proportion is more readily seen.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Just as courage imperils life, fear protects it.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Common Sense is that which judges the things given to it by other senses.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Painting is poetry that is seen rather than felt, and poetry is painting that is felt rather than seen
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Experience does not err. Only your judgments err by expecting from her what is not in her power.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The most praiseworthy form of painting is one that most resembles what it imitates.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The desire to know is natural to good men.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
I roamed the countryside searching for answers to things I did not understand. Why thunder lasts longer than that which causes it, and why immediately on its creation the lightning becomes visible to the eye while thunder requires time to travel.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The men of experiment are like the ant; they only collect and use. But the bee . . . gathers its materials from the flowers of the garden and of the field, but transforms and digests it by a power of its own.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Experience does not ever err; it is only your judgment that errs in promising itself results which are not caused by your experiments
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
A good painter is to paint two main things, men and the working of man's mind.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Intellectual passion drives out sensuality
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Many have made a trade of delusions and false miracles, deceiving the stupid multitude.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Patience serves as a protection against wrongs as clothes do against cold. For if you put on more clothes as the cold increases, it will have no power to hurt you. So in like manner you must grow in patience when you meet with great wrongs, and they
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Wisdom is the daughter of experience.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Thou, O God, dost sell us all good things at the price of labor
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The art of procreation and the members employed therein are so repulsive, that if it were not for the beauty of the faces and the adornments of the actors and the pent-up impulse, nature would lose the human species.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Anyone who conducts an argument by appealing to authority is not using his intelligence he is just using his memory
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Just as eating contrary to the inclination is injurious to the health, so study without desire sports the memory, and it retains nothing that it takes in.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
No member needs so great a number of muscles as the tongue; this exceeds all the rest in the number of its movements
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Nature is full of infinite causes that have never occurred in experience.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Although nature commences with reason and ends in experience it is necessary for us to do the opposite, that is to commence with experience and from this to proceed to investigate the reason.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
The poet ranks far below the painter in the representation of visible things, and far below the musician in that of invisible things.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Nothing can be love or hated unless it is first known.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
I have learned from an early age to abjured the use of meat, and the time will come when men such as I will look upon the murder of animals as they now look upon the murder of men
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Obstacles cannot crush me. Every obstacle yields to stern resolve. He who is fixed to a star does not change his mind.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
When once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you will always long to return.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
Intellectual passion dries out sensuality.
   Leonardo da Vinci
----
RT @gadievron @beaker True life TCP confessions: "Forgive me father, for I have SYN'd. It's been 230 ms since my last retransmission..."
----
I have a great love and respect for religion, great love and respect for atheism. What I hate is agnosticism, people who do not choose.
   Orson Welles
----
A friend is someone who lets you have total freedom to be yourself.
   Jim Morrison
----
<Cthon98> hey, if you type in your pw, it will show as stars
<Cthon98> ********* see!
<AzureDiamond> hunter2
<AzureDiamond> doesnt look like stars to me
<Cthon98> <AzureDiamond> *******
<Cthon98> thats what I see
<AzureDiamond> oh, really?
<Cthon98> Absolutely
<AzureDiamond> you can go hunter2 my hunter2-ing hunter2
<AzureDiamond> haha, does that look funny to you?
<Cthon98> lol, yes. See, when YOU type hunter2, it shows to us as *******
<AzureDiamond> thats neat, I didnt know IRC did that
<Cthon98> yep, no matter how many times you type hunter2, it will show to us as *******
<AzureDiamond> awesome!
<AzureDiamond> wait, how do you know my pw?
<Cthon98> er, I just copy pasted YOUR ******'s and it appears to YOU as hunter2 cause its your pw
<AzureDiamond> oh, ok.
   Seen at http://www.bash.org/?244321
----
The guy who thought of that should be shot, hanged, guillotined and poisoned. (you pick your order)
   Michael Van Canneyt, Seen at FPC-Devel malling list
----
Finding the right Question is more valuable and rewarding than finding the right Answer.
   Leif Ericsson Leo Veness
----
Fall seven times, stand up eight.
   Japanese Proverb
----
I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it.
   Thomas Jefferson
----
To see what is right and not to do it is cowardice. 
   Confucius
----
The race is not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running.
----
Dare to be Great
----
Winners never quit and quitters never win. 
   Vince Lombardi
----
I hated every minute of training, but I said, ''Don't quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.''
   Muhammad Ali
----
The difference between try and triumph is a little umph.
----
Men are made stronger on realization that the helping hand they need is at the end of their own arm.
   Sidney J. Phillips
----
Saints are sinners who kept on going.
   Robert Louis Stevenson
----
With ordinary talent and extraordinary perseverance, all things are attainable. 
   Thomas Foxwell Buxton
----
Do not look where you fell, but where you slipped.
   African Proverb
----
Go to the edge of the cliff and jump off. Build your wings on the way down. 
   Ray Bradbury
----
If you can do a half-assed job of anything, you're a one-eyed man in a kingdom of the blind.
   Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
----
Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.
   Winston Churchill
----
Fortune sides with he who dares. 
   Virgil
----
The only certain means of success is to render more and better service than is expected of you, no matter what your task may be. This is a habit followed by all successful people since the beginning of time. Therefore I say the surest way to doom yourself to mediocrity is to perform only the work for which you are paid. 
   Og Mandino
----
Stubbornly persist, and you will find that the limits of your stubbornness go well beyond the stubbornness of your limits.
   Robert Brault
----
Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you.
   Ralph Waldo Emerson
----
Sweat is the cologne of accomplishment.
   Heywood Hale Broun
----
Courage is not the lack of fear.
It is acting in spite of it. 
   Mark Twain
----
A great deal of talent is lost to the world for want of a little courage. Every day sends to their graves obscure men whose timidity prevented them from making a first effort.
   Sydney Smith
----
A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.
   John A. Shedd
----
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. 
   Sir Winston Churchill
----
Some people dream of success while others wake up and work hard at it.
----
The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary.
   Donald Kendall
----
We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit.
   Aristotle
----
Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered - either by themselves or by others.
   Mark Twain
----
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful people could change the world. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has.
   Margaret Mead
----
I'd rather be a failure at something I enjoy than a success at something I hate.
   George Burns
----
If we are facing in the right direction, all we have to do is keep on walking. 
   Buddhist Proverb
----
When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.
   Franklin D. Roosevelt
----
When the world says, "Give up," 
Hope whispers, "Try it one more time."
----
Nothing will ever be attempted if all possible objections must first be overcome.
   Samuel Johnson
----
The hardest thing in life to learn is which bridge to cross and which to burn.
   David Russell
----
If not now, when? If not us, who?
   George Romney
----

Benjamin Franklin's Thirteen Virtues

1. Temperance. Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation.
2. Silence. Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation.
3. Order. Let all your things have their places; let each part of your business have its time.
4. Resolution. Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve.
5. Frugality. Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i.e., waste nothing.
6. Industry. Lose no time; be always employ'd in something useful; cut off all unnecessary actions.
7. Sincerity. Use no hurtful deceit; think innocently and justly, and, if you speak, speak accordingly.
8. Justice. Wrong none by doing injuries, or omitting the benefits that are your duty.
9. Moderation. Avoid extreams; forbear resenting injuries so much as you think they deserve.
10. Cleanliness. Tolerate no uncleanliness in body, cloaths, or habitation.
11. Tranquility. Be not disturbed at trifles, or at accidents common or unavoidable.
12. Chastity. Rarely use venery but for health or offspring, never to dulness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another's peace or reputation.
13. Humility. Imitate Jesus and Socrates.
----
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
----
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
   Robert Bloch 
----
There is a place you can touch a woman that will drive her crazy. Her heart. 
   Melanie Griffith 
----
The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.
   Mark Twain 
----
Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected! 
----
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people. 
----
Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery. 
----
Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.
   Buddha
----
Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.
   Buddha
----
All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become.
   Buddha
----
You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.
   Buddha
----
The whole secret of existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will become of you, depend on no one. Only the moment you reject all help are you freed.
   Buddha
----
No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.
   Buddha
----
When you realize how perfect everything is you will tilt your head back and laugh at the sky
   Buddha
----
What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow: Our life is the creation of our mind.
   Buddha
----
Jazz isn't dead. It just smells funny.
   Frank Zappa
----
Information is not knowledge.
Knowledge is not wisdom.
Wisdom is not truth.
Truth is not beauty.
Beauty is not love.
Love is not music.
Music is THE BEST.
   Frank Zappa
----
A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything.
   Friedrich Nietzsche 
----
Change of Cast. - As soon as a religion comes to dominate it has as its opponents all those who would have been its first disciples.
   Nietzsche Quotes - Human, all too Human, s.118
----
Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
   Jay Leno
----
If Beethoven had been killed in a plane crash at the age of 22, it would have changed the history of music... and of aviation.
   Tom Stoppard
----
You create your opportunities by asking for them.
   Patty Hansen
----
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
   Mae West (1892 - 1980)
----
I look at what the phone company does and do the opposite.
   Craig Newmark 
----
Some people like my advice so much that they frame it upon the wall instead of using it.
   Gordon R. Dickson
----
You cannot choose your battlefield, God does that for you;
But you can plant a standard Where a standard never flew.
    Nathalia Crane
----
Man's right to know, to learn, to inquire, to make bona fide errors, to investigate human emotions must, by all means, be safe, if the word FREEDOM should ever be more than an empty political slogan.
    Wilhelm Reich
----
There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.
    Will Rogers
----
Remember, remember, the 5th of November
The Gunpowder Treason and plot;
I know of no reason why Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot.
    Traditional rhyme for Guy Fawkes Night. 
----
I don’t think that combat has ever been written about truthfully; it has always been described in terms of bravery and cowardice. I won’t even accept these words as terms of human reference any more. And anyway, hell, they don’t even apply to what, in actual fact, modern warfare has become.
    James Jones
----
Do not wait for the Last Judgment. It takes place every day.
    Albert Camus
----
The important thing is to pull yourself up by your own hair to turn yourself inside out and see the whole world with fresh eyes
    Peter Weiss
----
To love another is something like prayer and it can't be planned, you just fall into its arms because your belief undoes your disbelief.
    Anne Sexton
----
There's never been a true war that wasn't fought between two sets of people who were certain they were in the right. The really dangerous people believe they are doing whatever they are doing solely and only because it is without question the right thing to do. And that is what makes them dangerous.
    "Mr. Wednesday" in American Gods by Neil Gaiman
----
To be what we are, and to become what we are capable of becoming, is the only end of life.
    Robert Louis Stevenson
----
A moment comes, which comes but rarely in history, when we step out from the old to the new, when an age ends, and when the soul of a nation, long suppressed, finds utterance.
    Jawaharlal Nehru
----
The deepest feeling always shows itself in silence;
not in silence, but restraint.
    Marianne Moore
----
We must face problems which do not lend themselves to easy or quick or permanent solutions. And we must face the fact that the United States is neither omnipotent nor omniscient, that we are only six percent of the world's population, that we cannot impose our will upon the other ninety-four percent of mankind, that we cannot right every wrong or reverse each adversity, and that therefore there cannot be an American solution to every world problem.
    John F. Kennedy
----
It requires twenty years for a man to rise from the vegetable state in which he is within his mother's womb, and from the pure animal state which is the lot of his early childhood, to the state when the maturity of reason begins to appear. It has required thirty centuries to learn a little about his structure. It would need eternity to learn something about his soul. It takes an instant to kill him.
    Voltaire
----
To see a World in a Grain of Sand
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower,
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand
And Eternity in an hour.
    William Blake
----
All that is not eternal is eternally out of date.
    C. S. Lewis
----
The truth is, when all is said and done, one does not teach a subject, one teaches a student how to learn it.
    Jacques Barzun
----
If you give a good idea to a mediocre team they will screw it up; if you give a mediocre idea to a great team they will either fix it or throw it away and come up with something that works
    Ed Catmull, Pixar
----
I do not suffer from Misanthropy, I suffer from the human race
----
I dream of a better tomorrow... where chickens can cross roads and not have their motives questioned 
----
I'm never wrong. I once thought I was wrong, turns out, I was mistaken. 
----
No one will win the battle of the sexes, there is too much flirting with the enemy
    Henry Kissinger 
----
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
    W. C. Fields
----
Last night I was looking at the stars and I wondered... where the hell's my ceiling! 
----
I'm trying to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head that far up your a**. 
----
i'm one of those people that laughs at a joke 3 TIMES:
>>ONCE when it's told to me
>>ONCE when it's explained to me
>>and
>>ONCE 5 minutes later when i finally understand it 
----
Whoever said nothing was impossible never tried slamming a revolving door. 
----
When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the fire department generally uses water. 
----
What happens if you get scared half to death twice??? 
----
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
    Benjamin Franklin
----
Never play leap frog with a unicorn 
----
Sometimes my mind wanders; other times it leaves completely. 
----
When life gives you lemons, make orange juice and leave the world wondering how the hell you did it. 
----
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing
----
A day without sunshine is like, night.
----
A rule of grammar: double negatives are a no-no
----
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something
----
If the grass is greener on the other side, you can bet the water bill is higher
----
Many people quit looking for work when they find a job
----
Don't tell me the sky is the limit when we've put footprints on the moo
----
Politicians and diapers need to be changed regularly, usually for the same reason.
----
Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them.
----
For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
----
I tried to put my head together but now my body is falling apart!!
----
A penny saved is a government oversight
----
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends. 
----
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement .
----
If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody. 
----
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble
----
Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells 'Theirs.' 
----
Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf.
----
I say no to alcohol, it just doesn't listen. 
----
Work is fine if it doesn't take too much of your time
----
Born free, taxed to death
----
Whether you think you can or can't, you're right
----
Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film
----
Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking
----
The trouble with being punctual is that no one is there to appreciate it
----
In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?
----
The cigarette does the smoking you are just the sucker. 
----
Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock
----
To err is human, to forgive is not a Company policy
----
The road to success..... Is always under construction
----
Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does milk
----
In order to get a loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it
----
All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive, fattening or married to someone else
----
Silence is golden... duck tape is silver
----
By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong
----
I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
----
We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police
----
Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship
----
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list
----
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
----
If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong
----
We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public
----
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad
----
Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up
----
Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand
    Mae West
----
Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't
----
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research
----
If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?
----
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments
----
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
----
Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?
----
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks
----
I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian
----
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing
----
I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you
----
I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it...so I said "Implants?"
----
Good girls are bad girls that never get caught
----
Some people say "If you can't beat them, join them". I say "If you can't beat them, beat them", because they will be expecting you to join them, so you will have the element of surprise
----
The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!
----
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live
----
Laugh at your problems, everybody else does
----
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back
----
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip
----
Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were
----
When in doubt, mumble
----
Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen
----
Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off
----
Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you're an asshole
----
I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours
----
I should've known it wasn't going to work out between my ex-wife and me. After all, I'm a Libra and she's a bitch
----
I always take life with a grain of salt, ...plus a slice of lemon, ...and a shot of tequila.
----
Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat
----
There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away
----
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure
----
You are such a good friend that if we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket... I'd miss you heaps and think of you often
----
I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."
----
Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil
----
Does this rag smell like chloroform to you? 
----
A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist
----
Some people hear voices.. Some see invisible people.. Others have no imagination whatsoever
----
A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer
----
If winning isn't everything why do they keep score?
----
Virginity is like a soapbubble, one prick and it is gone
----
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you!
----
A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it
----
Hallmark Card: "I'm so miserable without you, it's almost like you're still here."
----
If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child
----
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be
----
Top 20 Replies by programmers when their program do not work:

20. That's weird ...
19. It's never done that before ...
18. It worked yesterday 
17. How is it possible ?
16. It must be a hardware problem
15. What did you type it wrong to make it crash ?
14. There is something funky in your data
13. I haven't touched this module in weeks !
12. You must have the wrong version
11. It's just unlucky coincidence
10. I can't test everything
9. THIS can't be the source of THAT
8. It works, but it haven't been tested
7. Somebody must have changed my code
6. Did you check for a virus in your system ?
5. Even though it does not work, how does it feel ?
4. You can't use that version on your system
3. Why do you want to do it that way ?
2. Where were you when the program blow up ?
1. It works on my machine
----
I do not have an off by one bugs, i'm just ahead of the buffer ...
    ik5
----
The man who passes the sentence should swing the sword
    Eddard Stark - Game of thrones
----
Let us make a special effort to stop communicating with each other, so we can have some conversation.
    Judith Martin
----
A certain amount of opposition is a great help to a man; it is what he wants and must have to be good for anything. Hardship and opposition are the native soil of manhood and self-reliance.
    John Neal
----
The strongest possible piece of advice I would give any young woman is: Don't screw around, and don't smoke.
    Edwina Currie, in Observer, 1988
----
The law is not so much carved in stone as it is written in water, flowing in and out with the tide.
    Jeff Melvoin, Northern Exposure, Crime and Punishment, 1992
----
Get not your friends by bare compliments, but by giving them sensible tokens of your love.
    Socrates (469 BC - 399 BC)
----
Laughter is an instant vacation.
    Milton Berle (1908 - 2002)
----
A handful of patience is worth more than a bushel of brains.
    Dutch Proverb
----
A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
    Groucho Marx (1890 - 1977)
----
I am patient with stupidity but not with those who are proud of it.
    Edith Sitwell (1887 - 1964)
----
Life is like Stepping onto a boat which is about to sail out to sea and sink
    Suzuki Roshi, Zen master
----
May you live in interesting times, and attract the attention of important people.
----
Some would sooner die than think.  In fact, they often do.
    Bertrand Russell
----
And life itself confided this secret to me:  'Behold, it said, 'I am that which must always overcome itself.  Indeed, you call it a will to procreate or a drive to an end, to something higher, farther, more manifold....
    Thus Spake Zarathustra II 12
----
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.
    Aristotle
----
Whenever you point your finger at someone, you have *3* pointed at yourself.
    Hindu proverb
----
The tragedy of this life is not failure, but low aim.
    Benjamin Mays
----
Think universally, Act Selfishly
----
I have opinions of my own--strong opinions--but I don't always agree with them.
    George Bush I
----
The state is the great fictitious entity by which everyone seeks to live at the expense of everyone else.
    Frederic Bastiat
----
Anarchy means having to put up with things that really piss you off.
----
psychedelic drugs cause paranoia, confusion, and total loss of reality in politicians that have never taken them
    Dr. Timothy Leary
----
There is no better argument against democracy than a five-minute conversation the common man
    Winston Churchill
----
I said a lot of stupid things when I was with the Conservative Party, and I left them, because I did not want to go on saying stupid things.
    Winston Churchill
----
Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few.
    G. B. Shaw
----
Spending on the military doesn't increase the deficit.
    Ronald Reagan
----
If ignorance ever goes to $40 a barrel, I want drillin' rights on that man's head.
    Texas Agriculture Commissioner Jim Hightower discussing President George Bush's policies
----
There's a lot of uncertainty that's not clear in my mind.
    Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis
----
Laws... so widely disobeyed and which cannot be enforced only promote disrespect for the law in general.
    New Jersey Assemblyman Mikulak, regarding the 55 MPH limit
----
The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly,' meaning 'many,' and the word 'ticks,' meaning 'blood sucking parasites.'
    Dave Barry
----
Power which can be abused, will be abused.
    Jim Warner
----
The Pen is mightier than the Sword.
The Court is mightier than the Pen.
The Sword is mightier than the Court.
    Rey Barry
----
The penalty that good men pay for not being interested in politics is to be governed by men worse than themselves...
    Plato
----
He's suffering from Politicians' Logic. Something must be done, this is something, therefore we must do it.
    Jonathan Lynn and Antony Jay, "Yes, Prime Minister"
----
Outlawing drugs in order to solve drug problems is much like outlawing sex... to win the war against AIDS.
    Ronald Siegel, "Intoxication"
----
If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.
    Derek Bok, president of Harvard
----
What right does Congress have to go around making laws just because they deem it necessary?
    Marion Barry
----
A billion dollars here and a billion dollars there soon added up to real money.
    Senator Everett Dirksen
----
The question of whether a computer can think is no more interesting than the question of whether a submarine can swim.
    Edsger W. Dijkstra
----
Never mistake a clear view for a short distance
    Paul Saffo, Institute for the Future
----
We cannot predict where, ultimately, the Computer Revolution will take us. All we know for certain is that, when we finally get there, we won't have enough RAM.
    Dave Barry
----
I admit that when I was in school I wrote COBOL. But I didn't compile.
    Bill davidsen, GE Corp. R&D Center; Box 8; Schenectady NY 12345
----
A month in the laboratory can often save an hour in the library.
    F. H. Westheimer
----
Computers are useless. All they can do is give you answers.
    Pablo Picasso
----
Along with the standard computer warranty agreement which said that if the machine

 * didn't work,
 * didn't do what the expensive advertisement said,
 * electrocuted the immediate neighbourhood,  and in fact failed entirely to be 
   inside the expensive box when you opened it,

this was expressly, absolutely, implicitly and in no event the fault or responsibility of the manufacturer, that the purchaser should consider himself lucky to be allowed to give his money to the manufacturer, and that any attempt to treat what had just been paid for as the purchaser's own property would result in the attentions of serious men with menacing briefcases and very thin watches.

    Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman, Good Omens
----
Do not go gentle into that long, dark night but rage, rage against the dying of the light.
    Dylan Thomas
----
Zero defects: 
 The result of shutting down a production line.
    Kelvin Throop III, "The Management Dictionary"
----
There are bugs and then there are bugs. And then there are bugs.
    Karl Lehenbauer
----
A Consultant is a guy who knows 125 different ways to make love, but who doesn't know any women.
    Mark Russell
----
We're going to have tentacles into the PC-buying community that are going to get us closer and closer to the right answers.
    Andrew Grove, Intel's CEO speaking on the Pentium math errors
----
Each time you toss out a "singing" greeting card, you are disposing of more computing power than existed in the entire world before 1950.
    Paul Saffo, futurist
----
On two occasions I have been asked [by members of Parliament!], `Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?'  I am not able rightly to apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question.
    Charles Babbage
----
In fact, "atheism" is a term that should not even exist. No one ever needs to identify himself as a "non-astrologer" or a "non-alchemist." We do not have words for people who doubt that Elvis is still alive or that aliens have traversed the galaxy only to molest ranchers and their cattle. Atheism is nothing more than the noises reasonable people make in the presence of unjustified religious beliefs.
    Sam Harris, Letter to a Christian Nation 
----
Consider it: every person you have ever met, every person will suffer the loss of his friends and family. All are going to lose everything they love in this world. Why would one want to be anything but kind to them in the meantime?
    Sam Harris, The End of Faith: Religion, Terror, and the Future of Reason 
----
Theology is ignorance with wings
    Sam Harris
----
I have no special talent, I'm only passionatley courious.
    Albert Einstein
----
One disk to rule them all, One disk to find them. 
One disk to bring them all and in the darkness grind them. 
In the Land of Redmond where the shadows lie.
    The Silicon Valley Tarot, Henrique Holschuh
----
I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours
    Stephen Roberts 
----
If the consumer price data confirm an acceleration in inflation then there's a real risk the bank could tighten as soon as November
    Stephen Roberts
----
Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
    Oscar Wilde
----
... when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.
    Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
----
The only way you can beat the lawyers is to die with nothing.
    Will Rogers
----
What is written without effort is in general read without pleasure.
    Samuel Johnson
----
You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.
    Mae West
----
A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing.
    Joey Adams
----
Only one thing, is impossible for god: to find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.
    Mark Twain
----
Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
    Mark Twain
----
Beauty: The power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
    Ambrose Bierce
----
Sex with love is the greatest thing in life. But sex without love - that's not so bad either.
    Mae West
----
I love flying. I've been to almost as many places as my luggage.
    Bob Hope
----
Technological progress has merely provided us with more efficient means for going backwards.
    Aldous Huxley
----
Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is.
    Barbara Bush
----
To invent, you need a good imagination and a pile of junk.
    Thomas Alva Edison
----
And lastly there is the oldest and deepest desire, the Great Escape: the Escape from Death.
    J.R.R. Tolkien
----
One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.
    Rita Mae Brown
----
Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind.
    John F. Kennedy
----
The profession of book writing makes horse racing seem like a solid and stable business.
    John Steinbeck
----
There ought to be one day - just one - when there is open season on senators.
    Will Rogers
----
Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin
bottle: "Take two aspirin" and "Keep away from children"
----
If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the
impersonators would be dead.
    Johnny Carson
----
If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number?
    Robin Williams
----
I was the first woman to burn my bra - it took the fire department four days to put it out.
    Dolly Parton
----
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men.
Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.
    Tiger Woods
----
Nature gave us one tongue and two ears so we could hear twice as much as we speak.
    Epictetus 
----
Two monologues do not make a dialogue.
    Jeff Daly
----
They have come up with a perfect understanding. He won't try to run her life, and he won't try to run his, either
----
A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.
    Oscar Wilde
----
A man who marries a woman to educate her falls a victim to the same fallacy as the woman who marries a man to reform him.
    Elbert Hubbard 
----
All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult.
----
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too.
    Henry Louis Mencken 
----
By all means marry. If you get a good wife you will become happy, and if you get a bad one you will become a philosopher.
    Socrates 
----
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
    Zsa Zsa Gabor
----
If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers
----
It is most unwise for people in love to marry.
    George Bernard Shaw 
----
Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and half shut afterwards.
    Benjamin Franklin
----
Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before marriage, which is never advisable.
    Oscar Wilde
----
My wife and I tried to breakfast together, but we had to stop or our marriage would have been wrecked.
    Winston Churchill 
----
Never take a wife until you have a house (and a fire) to put her in.
    Benjamin Franklin 
----
We wanted proper outback: a place where men were men and sheep were nervous.
    Bill Bryson, "Down Under"
----
[a grizzly] can tear through a tree like a Jewish mother through self-esteem.
    The Simpsons
----
"NULLUS ANXIETAS" - Motto of the EcksEcksEcksEcks University,
    Terry Pratchett, "The Last Continent"
----
(God) is my favourite fictional character.
    Homer Simpson
----
I was being prosecuted for my beliefs.... I believed people wouldn't notice I'd 
sold them camels with plaster teeth until I was well out of town. 
    Khuft, Terry Pratchett, "Pyramids"
----
...plasma or LCD television panels large enough to deserve their own postcode...
----
Please don't eat me, I have wife and kids - eat them!
    Homer Simpson
----
Don't blame me, *I* voted for Kodos 
    Homer Simpson
----
Television is a medium because anything well done is rare.
    Fred Allen
----
Why a man would want a wife is a big mystery to some people.
Why a man would want two wives is a bigamystery.
----
There is not enough time to do all the nothing we want to do.
    Bill Watterson
----
Judge: "Are you trying to show contempt for this court, Mr Smith?"
F. E. Smith: "No, My Lord. I am attempting to conceal it."
----
Promises are like babies: fun to make, but hell to deliver.
    Nadav Har'El
----
The problem with political jokes is they get elected.
    Henry Cate
----
Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.
    Joey Adams
----
DNA - National Dyslexic Association
----
To retain respect for sausages and laws, one must not watch them in the making.
    Otto von Bismarck
----
If you advertise you framework as "even an idiot can make a page in 30 minutes" 
you will end up with a lot of idiots writing pages in 30 minutes...
    levhita - https://github.com/rails/rails/issues/5228#issuecomment-4374607
----
Treat the earth well: it was not given to you by your parents, it was loaned to you by your children.
    Native American
----
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost .... I am helpless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend that I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in this same place.
But, it isn't my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in ... it's a habit ... but, my eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

I walk down another street
    By Portia Nelson
----
I see a glass and a lequid, and I choose how to look at it, and use it
----
There are only two hard things in Computer Science: cache invalidation, naming things and off-by-one errors.
    Cody Brocious, seen at https://twitter.com/#!/daeken/status/181865909865029632
----
Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
    Dr. Seuss
----
Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.
    Dr. Seuss, Happy Birthday to You! 
----
The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you'll go.
    Dr. Seuss, I Can Read With My Eyes Shut! 
----
A person's a person, no matter how small.
    Dr. Seuss, Horton Hears a Who! 
----
Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, Nothing is going to get better. It's not.
    Dr. Seuss, The Lorax 
----
Being crazy isn't enough.
    Dr. Seuss
----
Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, it's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope.
    Dr. Seuss
----
I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!
    Dr. Seuss
----
From there to here, from here to there, funny things are everywhere!
    Dr. Seuss, One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish 
----
Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try!
    Dr. Seuss
----
If things start happening, don't worry, don't stew, just go right along and you'll start happening too.
    Dr. Seuss
----
I meant what I said and I said what I meant. An elephant's faithful one-hundred percent!
    Dr. Seuss, Horton Hatches the Egg 
----
You're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting,
So... get on your way!
    Dr. Seuss, Oh, the Places You'll Go! 
----
How did it get so late so soon?
    Dr. Seuss
----
Today was good. Today was fun. Tomorrow is another one.
    Dr. Seuss
----
If you never did you should. These things are fun and fun is good.
    Dr. Seuss
----
So be sure when you step, Step with care and great tact. And remember that life's A Great Balancing Act. And will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and ¾ percent guaranteed) Kid, you'll move mountains.
    Dr. Seuss, Oh, The Places You'll Go! 
----
Why fit in when you were born to stand out?
    Dr. Seuss
----
All alone! Whether you like it or not, alone is something you'll be quite a lot!
    Dr. Seuss, Oh, the Places You'll Go! and The Lorax 
----
When beetles fight these battles in a bottle with their paddles
and the bottle's on a poodle and the poodle's eating noodles...
...they call this a muddle puddle tweetle poodle beetle noodle
bottle paddle battle.
    Dr. Seuss, Fox in Socks 
----
Only you can control your future.
    Dr. Seuss
----
You’ll miss the best things if you keep your eyes shut.
    Dr. Seuss, I Can Read With My Eyes Shut! 
----
They say I'm old-fashioned, and live in the past, but sometimes I think progress progresses too fast!
    Dr. Seuss
----
You can get help from teachers, but you are going to have to learn a lot by yourself, sitting alone in a room.
    Dr. Seuss
----
I'm afraid that sometimes you'll play lonely games too. Games you can't win 'cause you'll play against you.
    Dr. Seuss
----
I’m glad we had the times together just to laugh and sing a song, seems like we just got started and then before you know it, the times we had together were gone.
    Dr. Seuss
----
ASAP. Whatever that means. It must mean, 'Act swiftly awesome pacyderm!
    Dr. Seuss, Horton Hears a Who! 
----
And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow,
stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.
    Dr. Seuss, How the Grinch Stole Christmas 
----
Think and wonder, wonder and think.
    Dr. Seuss
----
I am the Lorax. I speak for the trees. I speak for the trees for the trees have no tongues.
    Dr. Seuss, The Lorax 
----
Look at me!
Look at me!
Look at me NOW!
It is fun to have fun
But you have to know how.
    Dr. Seuss, The Cat in the Hat (Deluxe Edition) 
----
We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone 
whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual
weirdness and call it love
    Dr. Seuss
----
Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.
    Robert J. Hanlon
----
I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself. A small bird will drop frozen dead from a bough without ever having felt sorry for itself
    David Herbert Lawrence
----
Only when you understand that you were wrong, and asked the wrong question for 
the search, you can correct yourself and look for the proper answer
    IK
----
Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.
    Mark Twain
----
Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.
    Mark Twain
----
If you have ten thousand regulations you destroy all respect for the law.
    Winston Churchill
----
Healthy citizens are the greatest asset any country can have.
    Winston Churchill
----
Politics is not a game. It is an earnest business.
    Winston Churchill
----
Let us not seek the Republican answer or the Democratic answer, but the right answer. 
Let us not seek to fix the blame for the past. 
Let us accept our own responsibility for the future.
    John F. Kennedy 
----
The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive
the situation, unless you realize that that situation is over, you cannot move forward.
    Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free 
----
Letting go doesn't mean that you don't care about someone anymore. 
It's just realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.
    Deborah Reber, Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul 
----
Some birds are not meant to be caged, that's all. Their feathers are too bright,
their songs too sweet and wild. So you let them go, or when you open the cage to
feed them they somehow fly out past you. And the part of you that knows it was 
wrong to imprison them in the first place rejoices, but still, the place where 
you live is that much more drab and empty for their departure.”
    Stephen King, Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption: A Story from Different Seasons 
----
If people refuse to look at you in a new light and they can only see you for 
what you were, only see you for the mistakes you've made, if they don't realize 
that you are not your mistakes, then they have to go.
    Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free 
----
If you want to forget something or someone, never hate it, or never hate him/her.
Everything and everyone that you hate is engraved upon your heart; 
if you want to let go of something, if you want to forget, you cannot hate.
    C. JoyBell C.
----
Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what 
you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don't.
    Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free 
----
No matter how much suffering you went through, you never wanted to let go of those memories.
    Haruki Murakami
----
You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that 
they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles.
    C. JoyBell C.
----
It is important that we forgive ourselves for making mistakes. We need to learn 
from our errors and move on.
    Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free 
----
You must learn to let go. Release the stress. You were never in control anyway.
    Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free
----
Letting go means to come to the realization that some people are a part of your 
history, but not a part of your destiny.
    Steve Maraboli
----
If you let go a little, you will have a little peace. If you let go a lot, you will have a lot of peace.
    Ajahn Chah
----
How undisturbed, the sleep of the foolish.
    Philip K. Dick
----
1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d
----
I'm not anti-social; I'm just not user friendly
----
I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code
----
Passwords are like underwear: You shouldn’t leave them out where people can see them. 
You should change them regularly. 
And you shouldn’t loan them out to strangers.
----
Concept: On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape button
----
My software never have bugs. It just develops random features
----
Roses are #FF0000
Violets are #0000FF
All my base
Are belong to you
    Seen on /.
----
Girls are like internet domain names, the ones I like are already taken
----
You know you need a life when...
1. You spend every Friday night on the computer
2. You just finished watching all three seasons of "Star Trek"
3. You've attempted watching the entire "Lord of the Rings" trilogy extended versions+ deleted scenes, etc.
4. You spend countless hours on youtube
5. You spend time reading things like this
6. You agree with any of the above...
    Dally D
----
That's a PEBKAC problem. (Problem Exists Between Keyboard And Chair)
----
Whenever government assumes to deliver us from the trouble of thinking for ourselves, 
the only consequences it produces are those of torpor and imbecility.
    William Godwin
----
All diplomacy is a continuation of war by other means.
    Zhou Enlai
----
If people knew how hard I had to work to gain my mastery, it would not seem so wonderful at all.
    Michelangelo
----
Even when laws have been written down, they ought not always to remain unaltered.
    Aristotle
----
As a rule, indeed, grown-up people are fairly correct on matters of fact; it is in the higher gift of imagination that they are so sadly to seek.
    Kenneth Grahame
----
We are not an endangered species ourselves yet, but this is not for lack of trying.
    Douglas Adams
----
A leader is one who, out of madness or goodness, volunteers to take upon himself the woe of the people. 
There are few men so foolish, hence the erratic quality of leadership in the world.
    John Updike
----
I knew, as everyone knows, that the easiest way to attract a crowd is to let it 
be known that at a given time and a given place some one is going to attempt 
something that in the event of failure will mean sudden death.
    Harry Houdini
----
If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least once in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things.
    Rene Descartes
----
Don't be afraid to cry. It will free your mind of sorrowful thoughts.
    Hopi Proverb 
----
Day and night cannot dwell together
    Duwamish  
----
It is better to have less thunder in the mouth and more lightning in the hand. 
    Apache Proverb 
----
All plants are our brothers and sisters. They talk to us and if we listen, we can hear them.
    Arapaho Proverb
----
Tell me and I'll forget. Show me, and I may not remember. Involve me, and I'll understand
    Native American Proverb
----
Before eating, always take time to thank the food.
    Arapaho Proverb
----
When we show our respect for other living things, they respond with respect for us.
    Arapaho Proverb
----
If we wonder often, the gift of knowledge will come.
    Arapaho Proverb 
----
Most of us do not look as handsome to others as we do to ourselves.
    Assiniboine
----
Those that lie down with dogs, get up with fleas.
    Blackfoot Proverb
----
In age, talk; in childhood, tears.
    Hopi Proverb
----
We always return to our first loves
    Native American Proverb
----
What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. 
It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. 
It is the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset.
    Blackfoot Proverb
----
When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced. 
Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice.
    Cherokee Proverb
----
Those who have one foot in the canoe, and one foot in the boat, are going to fall into the river
    Tuscarora Proverb
----
The weakness of the enemy makes our strength.
    Cherokee Proverb
----
When the white man discovered this country, Indians were running it. 
No taxes, no debt, women did all the work.  
White man thought he could improve on a system like this.
    Cherokee Proverb
----
Poverty is a noose that strangles humility and breeds disrespect for God and man.
    Sioux
----
Do not judge your neighbor until you walk two moons in his moccasins.
    Cheyenne
----
There is nothing as eloquent as a rattlesnakes tail.
    Navajo
----
Force, no matter how concealed, begets resistance.
    Lakota
----
Our first teacher is our own heart.
    Cheyenne
----
Everyone who is successful must have dreamed of something.
    Maricopa
----
All who have died are equal.
    Comanche
----
Remember that your children are not your own, but are lent to you by the Creator.
    Mohawk
----
One rain does not make a crop.
    Creole
----
Man's law changes with his understanding of man. Only the laws of the spirit remain always the same.
    Crow
----
What the people believe is true.
    Anishinabe
----
You already possess everything necessary to become great.
    Crow
----
There is no death, only a change of worlds.
    Duwamish
----
Life is not separate from death. It only looks that way.
    Blackfoot
----
You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.
    Navajo
----
It is less of a problem to be poor, than to be dishonest.
    Anishinabe
----
One finger cannot lift a pebble.
    Hopi
----
Beware of the man who does not talk, and the dog that does not bark.
    Cheyenne
----
All dreams spin out from the same web.
    Hopi
----
He who would do great things should not attempt them all alone.
    Seneca
----
Even a small mouse has anger.
    Native American
----
If a man is as wise as a serpent, he can afford to be as harmless as a dove.
    Cheyenne
----
The rainbow is a sign from Him who is in all things.
    Hopi
----
Walk lightly in the spring; Mother Earth is pregnant.
    Kiowa
----
When a man moves away from nature his heart becomes hard.
    Lakota
----
Old age is not as honorable as death, but most people want it.
    Crow
----
Many have fallen with the bottle in their hand.
    Lakota
----
Everything the power does, it does in a circle.
    Lakota
----
A brave man dies but once, a coward many times.
    Native American
----
A man or woman with many children has many homes.
    Lakota and Sioux
----
Seek wisdom, not knowledge. Knowledge is of the past, Wisdom is of the future.
    Lumbee
----
If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies in yourself.
    Minquass
----
A good chief gives, he does not take.
    Mohawk
----
Coyote is always out there waiting, and Coyote is always hungry.
    Navajo
----
Listening to a liar is like drinking warm water
    Native American
----
Every animal knows more than you do.
    Nez Perce
----
To touch the earth is to have harmony with nature.
    Oglala Sioux
----
When a fox walks lame, the old rabbit jumps. 
    Oklahoma
----
A starving man will eat with the wolf.
    Oklahoma
----
A danger foreseen is half-avoided. 
    Cheyenne
----
The coward shoots with shut eyes.
    Oklahoma
----
It is easy to be brave from a distance. 
    Omaha 
----
The bird who has eaten cannot fly with the bird that is hungry. 
    Omaha
----
Ask questions from you heart and you will be answered from the heart. 
    Omaha
----
A hungry stomach makes a short prayer.
    Paiute
----
Do not wrong or hate your neighbor for it is not he that you wrong but yourself.
    Pima
----
Make my enemy brave and strong, so that if defeated, I will not be ashamed.
    Plains
----
Cherish youth, but trust old age.
    Pueblo
----
Sharing and giving are the ways of God.
    Sauk
----
We are all one child spinning through Mother Sky.
    Shawnee
----
Each person is his own judge.
    Shawnee
----
We are made from Mother Earth and we go back to Mother Earth. 
    Shenandoah
----
It is no longer good enough to cry peace, we must act peace, live peace and 
live in peace.
    Shenandoah
----
There are many good moccasin tracks along the trail of a straight arrow. 
    Sioux
----
A rocky vineyard does not need a prayer, but a pick ax.
    Navajo
----
With all things and in all things, we are relatives. 
    Sioux
----
The one who tells the stories rules the world. 
    Hopi
----
A people without a history is like the wind over buffalo grass. 
    Sioux
----
The moon is not shamed by the barking of dogs.
    Southwest
----
Regard Heaven as your father, Earth as your Mother and all things as your Brothers and Sisters.
    Native American
----
White men have too many chiefs.
    Nez Perce
----
If a man is to do something more than human, he must have more than human powers.
    Native American
----
The soul would have no rainbow if the eye had no tears.
    Native American
----
Wisdom comes only when you stop looking for it and start living the life the 
Creator intended for you. 
    Hopi
----
Not every sweet root gives birth to sweet grass
    Native American
----
Take only what you need and leave the land as you found it. 
    Arapaho
----
It takes a thousand voices to tell a single story.
    Native American
----
Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.
    Cherokee
----
No river can return to its source, yet all rivers must have a beginning.
    Native American
----
Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf.
    Native American
----
Man has responsibility, not power.
    Tuscarora
----
The rain falls on the just and the unjust.
    Hopi
----
Each bird loves to hear itself sing.
    Arapaho
----
The way of the troublemaker is thorny.
    Umpqua
----
God gives us each a song.
    Ute
----
A man must make his own arrows.
    Winnebago
----
After dark all cats are leopards.
    Zuni
----
When you die, you will be spoken of as those in the sky, like the stars.
    Yurok
----
It takes many nails to build crib, but only one screw to fill it.
    Chinese Proverb 
----
People who think they know everything are annoying to those of us who do
----
 To speak before you think is like wiping your ass before you shit
----
Everyone likes a little ass, but no one likes a smart ass.
    Mr. Jack Tinner
----
Hey man, I may not go down in history, but I'll go down on your daughter.
    Ryan Macdonald
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Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur?
A: A "megasoreass"
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Why do we call something sent by car a "shipment" and something sent by ship a "cargo?
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If our food and drink don't meet your standards, please lower your standards
    Chewy's Restaurant Wall
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 Pretend you're smart: use quotes.
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There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
    Steven Wright
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It's hard to argue with the government. Remember, they run the Bureau of Alcohol, 
Tobacco and Firearms, so they must know a thing or two about satisfying women.
    Scott Adams 
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I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.
    A Bit of Fry and Laurie
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What is a committee? A group of the unwilling, picked from the unfit, to do the unnecessary.
    Mark Twain
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I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
    A. Whitney Brown
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A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.
    William James
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When cryptography is outlawed, bayl bhgynjf jvyy unir cevinpl.
("When cryptography is outlawedonly outlaws will have privacy") 
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You don't buy the drink here, you only rent it
    Restroom Graffiti 
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X-rated movies are all alike... the only thing they leave to the imagination is the plot. 
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All racists who are prepared to die for their country, please do that now.
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Always remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else
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Booze is the answer. I don't remember the question.
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I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.
    Bruce Lee
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Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one
    Bruce Lee
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Don't get set into one form, adapt it and build your own, and let it grow, be like water. 
Empty your mind, be formless, shapeless — like water. Now you put water in a cup,
it becomes the cup; You put water into a bottle it becomes the bottle; 
You put it in a teapot it becomes the teapot. Water can flow or it can crash. 
Be water, my friend.
    Bruce Lee
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If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you'll never get it done.
    Bruce Lee
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Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty,
often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, 
our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.
    Bruce Lee
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Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to 
the object, and you shall find a way around or through it. 
If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves.

Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup,
it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. 
You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. 
Be water, my friend.
    Bruce Lee
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Be happy, but never satisfied.
    Bruce Lee
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Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them.
    Bruce Lee
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Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty,
often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, 
our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.
    Bruce Lee
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Adapt what is useful, reject what is useless, and add what is specifically your own.
    Bruce Lee
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A wise man can learn more from a foolish question than a fool can learn from a wise answer.
    Bruce Lee
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I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who 
had practiced one kick 10,000 times.
    Bruce Lee
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The doubters said,
"Man can not fly,"
The doers said,
"Maybe, but we'll try,"
And finally soared
In the morning glow
While non-believers
Watched from below.
    Bruce Lee
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If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, 
it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. 
There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them.
    Bruce Lee
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To hell with circumstances; I create opportunities.
    Bruce Lee
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If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you'll never get it done.
    Bruce Lee
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The key to immortality is first living a life worth remembering.
    Bruce Lee
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A goal is not always meant to be reached, it often serves simply as something to aim at.
    Bruce Lee
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Don't fear failure. — Not failure, but low aim, is the crime.
In great attempts it is glorious even to fail.
    Bruce Lee, Striking Thoughts: Bruce Lee's Wisdom for Daily Living 
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If you don't want to slip up tomorrow, speak the truth today.
    Bruce Lee
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Use only that which works, and take it from any place you can find it.
    Bruce Lee, Tao of Jeet Kune Do 
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Not being tense but ready.
Not thinking but not dreaming.
Not being set but flexible.
Liberation from the uneasy sense of confinement.
It is being wholly and quietly alive, aware and alert, ready for whatever may come.
    Bruce Lee, Tao of Jeet Kune Do 
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It is not a daily increase, but a daily decrease. Hack away at the inessentials.
    Bruce Lee
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The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not
to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or defeat. Let nature take its course,
and your tools will strike at the right moment.
    Bruce Lee
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Empty your cup so that it may be filled; become devoid to gain totality.
    Bruce Lee
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Notice that the stiffest tree is most easily cracked, while the bamboo or willow
survives by bending with the wind.
    Bruce Lee
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A quick temper will make a fool of you soon enough.
    Bruce Lee
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Forget about winning and losing; forget about pride and pain. Let your opponent
graze your skin and you smash into his flesh; let him smash into your flesh and
you fracture his bones; let him fracture your bones and you take his life! 
Do not be concerned with escaping safely- lay your life before him!!
    Bruce Lee
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If there is a God, he is within. You don't ask God to give you things, you 
depend on God for your inner theme.
    Bruce Lee
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A good teacher protects his pupils from his own influence. 
    Bruce Lee
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To spend time is to pass it in a specified manner. To waste time is to expend it
thoughtlessly or carelessly. We all have time to either spend or waste and it is
our decision what to do with it. But once passed, it is gone forever.
    Bruce Lee
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Art calls for complete mastery of techniques, developed by reflection within the soul.
    Bruce Lee
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Time means a lot to me because you see I am also a learner and am often lost in
the joy of forever developing.
    Bruce Lee
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For it is easy to criticize and break down the spirit of others, but to know 
yourself takes a lifetime.
    Bruce Lee, Striking Thoughts: Bruce Lee's Wisdom for Daily Living 
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Take things as they are. Punch when you have to punch. Kick when you have to kick.
    Bruce Lee
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Be self aware, rather than a repetitious robot
    Bruce Lee
----
Now I see that I will never find the light
Unless, like the candle, I am my own fuel,
Consuming myself.
    Bruce Lee
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If you love life, don't waste time, for time is what life is made up of.
    Bruce Lee
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Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and 
look for a successfull personality and duplicate it.
    Bruce Lee
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The spirit of the individual is determined by his dominating thought habits.
    Bruce Lee, Jeet Kune Do: Bruce Lee's Commentaries on the Martial Way 
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As you think, so shall you become.
    Bruce Lee
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The meaning of life is that it is to be lived, and it is not to be traded and 
conceptualized and squeezed into a patter of systems.
    Bruce Lee, Striking Thoughts: Bruce Lee's Wisdom for Daily Living 
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Defeat is not defeat unless accepted as a reality-in your own mind.
    Bruce Lee
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You must be shapeless, formless, like water. When you pour water in a cup, it 
becomes the cup. When you pour water in a bottle, it becomes the bottle. When 
you pour water in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Water can drip and it can crash. 
Become like water my friend.
    Bruce Lee
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Self-knowledge involves relationship. To know oneself is to study one self in 
action with another person. Relationship is a process of self evaluation and 
self revelation. Relationship is the mirror in which you discover yourself - to 
be is to be related.
    Bruce Lee
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Don't get set into one form, adapt it and build your own, and let it grow, be like water.
    Bruce Lee
----
Using no way as a way, having no limitation as limitation.
    Bruce Lee, Tao of Jeet Kune Do 
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The stillness in stillness is not the real stillness; only when there is 
stillness in movement does the universal rhythm manifest.
    Bruce Lee
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Boards don't hit back.
    Bruce Lee
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Many people dedicate their lives to actualizing a concept of what they should be
like, rather than actualizing themselves.
This difference between self-actualization and self-image actualization is very
important. Most people live only for their image
    Bruce Lee
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Everything you do, if not in a relaxed state will be done at a lesser level than
you are proficient. Thus the tensed expert marksman will aim at a level less than
his/her student.
    Bruce Lee
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Ever since I was a child I have had this instinctive urge for expansion and growth.
To me, the function and duty of a quality human being is the sincere and honest 
development of one's potential.
    Bruce Lee
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Don't blink. Blink and you're dead. They are fast. Faster than you can believe. 
Don't turn your back. Don't look away. And don't blink. Good Luck. 
    Dr Who 
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People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, 
but *actually* from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint - it's more like a 
big ball of wibbly wobbly... time-y wimey... stuff. 
    Dr Who
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There are worlds out there where the sky is burning, where the sea's asleep and 
the rivers dream, people made of smoke and cities made of song. 
Somewhere there's danger, somewhere there's injustice and somewhere else the 
tea is getting cold. Come on, Ace, we've got work to do.
    Dr Who
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