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\f0\fs22 \cf0 Enlightenment\
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\'93How do I gain enlightenment?\'94 someone said to me the other day. \'93Can you not grant me some deep experience? I want a radical change in my life.\'94\
I get this asked frequently by many enthusiastic seekers. They are in search of a panacea, some mystical reality that will solve all their problems (spiritual and emotional) forever. While many aspirants understand the importance of persistence and individual effort, most others are looking for a quick fix. Here\'92s a beautiful quote by Adya Shanti that mirrors my own thoughts in ways more than one:\
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\cf3 Many seekers do not take full responsibility for their own liberation, but wait for one big, final spiritual experience which will catapult them fully into it. It is this search for the final liberating experience which gives rise to a rampant form of spiritual consumerism in which seekers go from one teacher to another, shopping for enlightenment as if shopping for sweets in a candy store. This spiritual promiscuity is rapidly turning the search for enlightenment into a cult of experience seekers. And, while many people indeed have powerful experiences, in most cases these do not lead to the profound transformation of the individual, which is the expression of enlightenment.\
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\cf2 One of the greatest misconceptions about enlightenment is that it will just happen. Not so. It has to be earned, it has to be lived. Sometimes I find it challenging to explain to seekers that true enlightenment is not a one-off special moment, but more a culmination of lifelong experiences and practices that result in the dawning of a great insight. I don\'92t blame them for thinking that by the magical touch of some guru or maybe by being struck by lightning, they will arrive at a moment of enlightenment. Partly because we have plenty of spiritual books out there that give that impression. Even I may have inadvertently conveyed the same by sharing one of my most defining spiritual experiences in my memoir. For that matter, Buddha\'92s enlightenment under the Bodhi tree is often construed as an isolated event of extraordinary significance. It was anything but that.\
In comprehending and highlighting such experiences, we tend to overlook the tremendous amount of effort that goes in realizing that state. For a moment, think of enlightenment as winning the Nobel Prize. We can\'92t have it just by visiting other Nobel Laureates and we certainly can\'92t be awarded it just because we want it. After a lifetime of commitment to a cause or producing a phenomenal body of work, and assuming the circumstances are favorable, the committee might consider your nomination and grant you one. No doubt winning the Nobel Prize will bring about a change in your life and lifestyle to a degree, you will inspire more people and so on. But, beyond that, there\'92s not much. It\'92s not going to improve your relationships, it\'92s not going to fix your physical health etc. Those challenges will remain.\
Without preparation and readiness, any spiritual experience is hardly transformational. And if an experience doesn\'92t trigger some kind of lasting transformation in you, however subtle, it holds little meaning ultimately. When you continue to walk the path sincerely, diligently, many learnings, lessons and experiences give you the wisdom to lead your life differently. Differently so in a manner that it\'92s more conducive to retaining a state of bliss. Having said that, even if you are enlightened, it doesn\'92t mean that you won\'92t experience pain or that you will always find joy in everything that goes on in your life.\
R.K. Laxman , one of India\'92s most famous cartoonists ever, writes a lovely passage in his travelogue\'a0
\i The Distorted Mirror
\i0 .\
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\cf3 People are curious about my profession and try to clear their doubts by putting all sorts of questions. Recently a lady asked me, \'93Do you do the drawings for your cartoons yourself?\'94 I answered, \'93Yes, I do.\'94 Then she questioned, \'93And the captions to the cartoons, do you write them too?\'94 \'93Of course,\'94 I said. And, finally, she asked, \'93The ideas for the cartoons, don\'92t say you think them up too?\'94\
\'85\
There is one [question] that is rather rarely asked but which makes me go into deep introspection. This is: \'93When you look around, does everything appear funny to you?\'94\
A cartoonist does not lead a charmed life of perpetual fun out of the reach of the cares and worries that bedevil his fellow men. The fluctuating prices of onions affect me in the same way as they delight or outrage a primary schoolteacher. Likewise, taxes depress my spirit. Bores at the mike, and traffic jams drive me crazy. Surely a doctor does not always look at life in terms of coughs, colds, allergies and bronchial inflammations. A star of the silver screen, I am sure, has enough sense to know that beyond the range of the camera life does not continue to be full of idyllic scenes, sex, songs and ketchup-blood. Why, then, should a cartoonist see living caricatures and hear rib-tickling dialogue all around him? So I comfort myself with the self-assurance that my view of life is normally as banal as that of the next man in the queue for sugar or kerosene.\
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\cf2 Enlightenment is something like that. It does not mean that you don\'92t feel the pain or remain eternally unaffected by everything that goes around you. All of that we must go through based on our karma, temperament and attitude towards life. The only thing that changes is that you grow into a more spiritual being, you become increasingly resilient and kind. What life hurls at you doesn\'92t change, how you catch it or dodge it, does. When it builds to a tipping point, you become kind of independent, very independent. Less worried about what the world thinks of you, how it perceives you and so on. In other words, you draw your own cartoons, write your own captions and, much to the fascination or disbelief of others, come up with the ideas too.\
As the famous Zen saying goes, \'93Before enlightenment: chop wood, fetch water. After enlightenment: chop wood, fetch water.\'94\
Being a\'a0
\i jivan-mukta
\i0 , a liberated soul, or an enlightened person does not relieve one of his or her duties. Self-realization is not, as Eknath Easwaran put it, a compensation for one\'92s good deeds. It is but simply an outlook towards life that you gain from experiential understanding. If you really wish to get a grip on the notion of enlightenment then look upon it as a way of life, a commitment to virtues, as a promise to carry yourself a certain way and leading your life in a manner that befits you.\
Liberation is not plonking a glorious flag on top of Mount Everest, it is but a mindful and diligent journey meandering through many treks and hikes, stopping and camping along the way, meeting and greeting fellow travelers, absorbing the breathtaking views, appreciating the challenges, rejoicing in where you are already. All this while you remain inward focused but goal-oriented.\
When you realize this, a better sense of wellbeing and happiness shrouds you. You understand that there are no dark moments, that you are already enlightened. You just need to live a certain way to experience it. Then you laugh at the discovery that how unnecessarily seriously you\'92ve been taking yourself. As Thich Naht Hanh said:\
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\cf3 I laugh when I think how I once sought paradise as a realm outside of the world of birth. It is right in the world of birth and death that the miraculous truth is revealed. But this is not the laughter of someone who suddenly acquires a great fortune; neither is it the laughter of one who has won a victory. It is, rather, the laughter of one who; after having painfully searched for something for a long time, finds it one morning in the pocket of his coat.\
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\cf2 A religious man called a monk and invited him to bless his new home. The monk politely turned down the request saying he\'92s busy.\uc0\u8232 \'93But, what are you doing?\'94 the man insisted.\u8232 \'93Nothing.\'94\u8232 Thinking that the monk was perhaps not in a mood to visit that day, he let it be and phoned again the next day. \'93Can you come today to bless my home?\'94\u8232 \'93Sorry,\'94 said the monk, \'93I\'92m busy.\'94\u8232 \'93Doing what?\'94\u8232 \'93I\'92m doing nothing,\'94 replied the monk.\u8232 \'93But that was what you were doing yesterday!\'94 said the man.\u8232 \'93Right,\'94 the monk replied. \'93I\'92m not finished yet!\'94\
Enlightenment too is an ongoing affair. No doubt, there can be a transformational moment that changes something in you forever. Living that change, however, is a matter of mindfulness and more. True enlightenment, that.\
This is it. This life. It\'92s beautiful. Live it. Love it. For yourself, for others. Laugh it away. That\'92s all there is to know. Most of the rest, life can do without.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Mind Full to Mindful\
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\f1 \cf2 One day, Buddha was having a quiet moment with his monks when a man approached him and said, \'93Can you please impart me the greatest wisdom in the fewest possible words?\'94\
Buddha recognized this man\'92s presence and his question, and acknowledged it with a gentle smile, maintaining his silence.\
After waiting for a few minutes, the visitor bowed before Buddha and said, \'93Thank you very much. I have received the message. I shall take your leave now.\'94\
Shariputra, one of the more rebellious monks who never hesitated to pose questions to Buddha, asked him as soon as the visitor left, \'93How could this man thank you and gain something that we could not see?\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93Shariputra,\'94 Buddha replied, \'93a good horse runs even at the shadow of a whip. This man was ready.\'94\
Shariputra, however, still did not understand. When Buddha rose from his seat and left to rest for the afternoon, he checked with all the other monks if any of them understood. Apparently, none of them had. They decided to get together and request for great wisdom in the evening discourse.\
They asked Buddha, \'93Can you also impart us some knowledge, some wisdom, some insight \'96 never mind with the fewest possible words \'96 without saying anything at all? Maybe one of us is also ready.\'94\
Buddha just lifted a flower that was beside him, and held it in his hands for a few minutes. He did not say anything. He simply looked at the flower, unblinkingly. This was what Buddha did to impart the greatest wisdom, the greatest way of meditation, the greatest insight \'96 without saying anything. He just stared at the flower, then raised his eyes and smiled. Nobody else smiled except Mahakashyapa, one of his disciples. This was Buddha\'92s first documented transmission of Zen. This is where it all started.\
Mahakashyapa smiled because he understood what Buddha was trying to tell him, with a flower, with silence.\
Anything I or anyone else says will be an interpretation of that. Have you ever wondered why we offer flowers in worship? It\'92s not just for colour and fragrance. If it were just for that, we could offer many other beautiful things. We could smear our deity in beautiful colours; we could spray him with perfumes and scents. But why flowers? There is a very real and beautiful reason behind it. You see, a flower is a living thing. It has life and with time it withers.\
Buddha clarified further, addressing all his monks but looking at Mahakashyapa, \'93Everything is there, Mahakashyapa. Everything is just there. Nothing needs to be done. All you have to do is enjoy the beauty of this flower, with the mindfulness that this flower is not going to last forever \'96 this will one day wither.\'94\
An easy and beautiful way to experience Zen is to keep a flower at your desk at work, and perhaps one on your dining table and in your bedroom too. Don\'92t water it. Don\'92t replace it every day, either. Replace it only when it withers.\
Japanese texts say that the first Zen sutra uttered by Buddha was\'a0
\i Hana Wahraku, Ben Koku Na Haru
\i0 \'a0which means that a single flower blooms, and throughout the world it is spring.\
A flower in Zen is referred to as Buddha because he was born under flowers. He even died on flowers and lived on flowers. His devotees truly loved him more than they loved their own lives. He gained his enlightenment under a tree of flowers. Your mind can also be compared to one. When your mind blooms, the whole world is in spring. When it experiences autumn, no matter how much beauty there is in the external world, all feels lackluster. Everything is doomed and in gloom. Therefore, Zen says, let me simply focus on my mind. Because if I keep my mind in a state of bloom, the world is automatically beautiful.\
You are a flower and you have a beautiful life. Compare your lifestyle to those of billions of people, who can\'92t even afford to live a basic life. Most people don\'92t just order anything they like when they go to a restaurant. They look at the prices on the menu and then decide what they can afford. Not everybody enjoys the luxuries of life, but you do. Remember where you are in your life and what you are blessed with already. If this is not enough, if this still seems inadequate for you to experience happiness in life, then tell me, what would make you happy? Nothing else.\
Zen teaches us that happiness is not a pursuit. It\'92s not something we have to seek. Yes, we should have a zeal, zest and passion for life, but passion should not be taken as recklessness or an immoderate effort. This thing about passion, where you are constantly told you must have a \'93passion\'94 in life, is a very new, very American phenomenon. Billions of people lived before this came into vogue, and they had no \'93passions\'94 in their lives. But they were happy, quiet and content nonetheless.\
Zen says, just let me be in the present moment, that even breathing is a blessing. If I can\'92t be happy with what I have now, I can never be happy with whatever I may have in the future. It is all but apparent that every time and under any circumstances, you will have at least one difficult person in your life. You will face at least one big challenge. And you will have to deal with at least one adversity, whether that is mental, physical, emotional, psychical, psychological or spiritual. This is very much a part of life. But in all this, to be able to flow is Zen.\
In the thousand years after Buddha passed away, Zen did not really catch on. This is because people need anchors; people, they need rituals. When I say to people, \'93Just sit and be aware; you don\'92t have to do anything,\'94 they think it isn\'92t sufficient. As if they have already mastered the art of sitting still! If I give them a mantra \'96 and it is very rare for me to give someone one \'96 they will chant it for a few weeks, maybe months, and then come back to me and say, \'93Okay, what\'92s the next step?\'92\
This is very material thinking. There is no next step. If you can\'92t become one with yourself using any given path, there is no \'93next step\'94 that will ever get you there. There are stages in meditation, not steps, but you don\'92t get to those stages by doing different things. You don\'92t experience those stages by going further. In fact, they are more like states than stages.\
You just do what you do. You keep perfecting it; you keep championing it and then you reach that stage. As a certain martial arts master said to his student, \'93Don\'92t worry about learning ten thousand moves. You are not going to perfect that many. I am not interested in teaching ten thousand moves that you may do only once or twice. I am only interested in teaching you that one winning move that you will practice ten thousand times. That will become your perfect move.\'94\
1000 years passed and in the south of India, in a place called Kanchipuram, in present-day Tamil Nadu, a child was born into a royal family. Deeply influenced by the Buddhist teachings, he set out on a remarkable path that not only revived the Zen thought but took it far and wide\'85\
What you\'92ve just read is an extract from\'a0
\i Mind Full to Mindful
\i0 , my new book on Zen wisdom based on the discourses I gave in my Zen retreats in Canada and India. It\'92s a simple read, very Zen-like, full of anecdotes, with some humor and lovely illustrations. Since Zen is about living in the present, it is about \'93Now\'94, I don\'92t see any reason for you to not get your copy \'93Now\'94. I hope you enjoy this read. \uc0\u8232 \
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
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\f0 \cf2 \
Intention Vs Skill\
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\f1 \cf2 On a daily basis, I hear stories of despair and frustration, of helplessness and procrastination, where with utmost sincerity someone or the other tells me that they so want to do or be a certain way but no matter how hard they try, they keep going back to their old behavioral patterns. Why do we fail to keep our promises or why the path to success (even in small endeavors) is paved with hurdles and obstacles?\
I think I might just have the answer for you in simple and clear terms. But first, a little story that highlights my underlying philosophy.\
An affluent farmer owned coconut plantations, a barn with tens of cows and a small poultry farm. Waking up to a glorious sunrise over the ocean and sleeping under the starlit sky, he lived a simple and content life with his wife and a pet dog.\
\'93We need a full-time farmhand,\'94 his wife said, \'93someone who can stay with us.\'94 The farmer agreed as most of his staff would go back to their homes in the evening and given that they were aging, they required someone to be with them. He sent around a word in the village that a vacancy was available. Many people approached him for the job but one young man stood out in particular for his enthusiasm and confidence.\
\'93And why should I hire you?\'94 the farmer asked.\uc0\u8232 \'93I am honest, hardworking and skilled,\'94 he replied.\u8232 \'93Those I presume by default. Most who apply have those qualities.\'94\u8232 \'93Maybe,\'94 the young man said, \'93But, I can sleep through a raging storm.\'94\
The philosophical reply caught the farmer\'92s fancy and he hired him. True to his word, the farmhand worked tirelessly and managed the affairs well. Within a few months, he completely won the confidence of the couple and they started relying on him more and more.\
One night, their pet dog began howling rather ominously. The farmer and his wife tried to pacify it without any success. Soon, they realized that a violent storm was building up. He leaped out of his bed and rushed to his farmhand who was fast asleep.\
\'93Wake up!\'94 The farmer shook him. \'93A massive storm is coming!\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93Go away,\'94 he replied with squinty eyes staring into the flashlight the farmer held near his face.\u8232 \'93This is ridiculous! Get up, I said!\'94\u8232 \'93I told you, I can sleep through a raging storm,\'94 he answered in a groggy voice and turned to the other side.\u8232 \'93I\'92ll deal with you in the morning!\'94 the farmer yelled and ran outside with his wife to secure his property. The gale-force winds were blowing and a constantly thundering sky made it hard to even hear each other.\
They went to the shed first only to find out that bales of wheat and haystack were neatly bound and covered by a tarpaulin that was secured using tight guylines. The farm tools were placed in the storage shed next to it. The barn was properly locked and the cows looked calm and content with plenty of fodder and water in the trough. The door of the coop was latched properly. Everything was in its place.\
\'93Well,\'94 the wife said to the farmer, \'93he is certainly prepared to sleep through a raging storm.\'94\
We wish to be safe from adversities, temptations and obstacles but the key is preparation. Wanting to secure yourself, desiring to be a certain way, while important, is only the beginning. In fact, it\'92s the easy part. Whether or not you are equipped with (or at least committed to learn) the right knowledge and experience is what determines the probability of success.\
Recently, on the first day of my program, our AV vendor took a double booking and put an inexperienced person in his place to handle our event. The competent core team who was handling the event and our army of devoted volunteers sensed that the quality of our PA system could be better.\
\'93Sorry, Swami,\'94 someone came to me afterwards and said. \'93We\'92ll ensure this doesn\'92t happen tomorrow.\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93Apology accepted,\'94 I said, \'93but, unfortunately that\'92s unlikely to fix the problem.\'94\u8232 \'93I\'92ll personally man the PA system tomorrow,\'94 another pitched in.\u8232 \'93I appreciate it,\'94 I replied, \'93but, are you an expert? Please let\'92s aim to get the vendor back in here.\'94\
To their credit, they took control, pulled up the vendor, made some changes and the rest of the program went smooth as fresh butter (since I\'92ve been talking about cows and barn, a more appropriate analogy didn\'92t occur to me).\
I went on to explain the difference between intention and skill. It is one thing to have the intention to do something right and it is quite another to have the skill to do so. Sometimes you want to help someone or the other person wants to help you, that\'92s all very good but unless you possess the right skill, such intention is not going to amount to much. This gap between intention and skill is why many of us face failures in our endeavors. You may be a great artist, for example, but if your work isn\'92t selling then acquire sales skills. Success in each area requires a different skillset. Perhaps, that\'92s why, learning is a lifelong process.\
You want to be calm, but have you learned this skill? You want to surprise your partner by baking a cake but do you know baking? Plus, if the cake turns out a brick (hopefully, not charcoal), and your partner doesn\'92t appreciate, should you feel bad? Could you deliver in line with your intention? We want to care, love, succeed and so on but in the face of not having the appropriate skill, there\'92s little hope. Almost everything we know in life, we have learned it somewhere. And what we know really well is usually what we have done repeatedly, something we have championed by way of practice and training. That\'92s all there is to it: whatever we intend to accomplish, we need to master the skill behind it. A wise person told me once, \'93The only thing more expensive than hiring a professional is to hire an amateur.\'94\
A small crowd gathered around an old man who fainted in a busy market. Tearing into the assembly a man rushed to the spot where a woman was trying to revive the patient.\
\'93Get away, woman!\'94 he shouted. \'93I\'92m a first-aid specialist. I know exactly what to do.\'94\uc0\u8232 The woman tried to speak but he wasn\'92t having any of it. Finally, she stood on the side, her arms crossed, while the first-aider made frantic efforts to resuscitate the old man.\u8232 \'93When you get to now-call-the-doctor part,\'94 the lady said calmly, \'93I\'92m right here.\'94\
Whatever it is that you want to attain, that\'92s what you want to\'a0
\i be
\i0 . To achieve that, you wish to act or work a certain way. That\'92s your\'a0
\i intention
\i0 . Whether you are able to actually work in your intended manner is a matter of\'a0
\i skill
\i0 . The good news is that given reasonable time, guidance and discipline, each one of us is capable of mastering just about any skill.\
Next time, you find your efforts are not taking you anywhere near your goal, just write down your intention and underneath it the skill required to act in line with your intention. All confusion will dissipate. Work hard on the skill and the rest will fall in place.\
Bridge the gap between intention and skill; success is not far then. It\'92s never too late to start building that bridge. Indeed,\'a0
\i now
\i0 \'a0would just about be the perfect moment to begin.\uc0\u8232 Still waiting?\
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\f0 \cf2 \
Peace\
Swami\
\
The Spirit of Service\
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\f1 \cf2 Legend has it that\'a0the\'a0valiant ruler of Mewar, Maharana Pratap, was once sitting with a humble attendant of his.\'a0The\'a0year was 1580 when he was overpowered in an ongoing conflict with\'a0the\'a0Mughals. Though five years later, Maharana would reclaim most of his empire, presently however, he had been keeping a low profile and rebuilding his army. In this period of hostility and uncertainty, living on frugal means, he was sent two mangoes by one of his subjects.\
His servant cut\'a0the\'a0mangoes in eight parts and arranged them on a plate. They looked luscious, inviting and ripe.\
\'93Tell me how it tastes,\'94 Maharana Pratap said giving\'a0the\'a0first piece to\'a0the\'a0servant.\uc0\u8232 \'93Hukum,\'94 he said, after relishing a bit, \'93it is most delicious!\'94 And he requested another piece.\
A bit surprised, Maharana handed him one more which\'a0the\'a0servant gobbled down in a flash and pleaded for more. The king was taken aback at this unusual behavior but out of care for a man who had been serving him for ages, he obliged.\
\'93Please,\'94 he begged, \'93I\'92m starving. Give me\'a0the\'a0rest and I\'92ll personally go and fetch new mangoes for you.\'94\
In practically no time, one after another, he ate seven pieces while\'a0the\'a0king\'92s expression changed from that of amusement and compassion to disbelief and disgust.\
\'93You thankless rascal!\'94 Maharana thundered. \'93You are unfit to serve me.\'94 And with that, he put\'a0the\'a0last piece of\'a0the\'a0mango in his mouth only to spit out\'a0the\'a0next moment.\uc0\u8232 \'93You call this sour and bitter mango delicious?\'94 he exclaimed. \'93It tastes horrible!\'94\u8232 \'93I seek thy forgiveness,\'94\'a0the\'a0servant said. \'93For years, you have fed me and my family. Through thick and thin, you have protected us. I can\'92t give you anything in return but at least, I could avoid you tasting those sour mangoes.\'94\
It is fair to expect love in return of love. It is normal to desire acknowledgement of our efforts or recognition of our talents and work. Friendships and relationships thrive when people reciprocate in kind.\
The\'a0spirit\'a0of\'a0service, however, is an entirely different matter.\'a0Service\'a0expects nothing in return other than the well-being of the one we are serving.\
True\'a0service\'a0requires absolute selflessness, something even beyond altruism, for in\'a0service,\'a0the\'a0benchmark is not on whether you are acknowledged or special. Instead, your goal is to devote everything you\'92ve got to serve\'a0the\'a0cause that matters to you. And there lies\'a0the\'a0paradox,\'a0the\'a0more we devote ourselves wholeheartedly to our mission, without worrying about recognition,\'a0the\'a0greater success and satisfaction we derive from walking\'a0the\'a0path.\
Sometimes, people ask me what is surrender and how do we surrender to a cause or person?\'a0Service\'a0is surrender. Without surrender true\'a0service\'a0is not possible and without\'a0service\'a0surrender dies a quick death. Surrender is that feeling at heart that makes us let go. It helps us ease and relax. It makes us understand that we don\'92t have to control everything that is going on in our lives and we can\'92t. And\'a0service\'a0is then devoting wholeheartedly to what we do control: our actions, words and response to whatever comes our way.\
Moshe Kranc cites a beautiful parable (variations of which are found in every culture) in\'a0
\i The Hasidic Masters\'92 Guide to Management
\i0 :\
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\f2 \cf3 I once ascended to the firmaments. I first went to see Hell and the sight was horrifying. Row after row of tables were laden with platters of sumptuous food, yet the people seated around the tables were pale and emaciated, moaning in hunger. As I came closer, I understood their predicament.\
Every person held a full spoon, but both arms were splinted with wooden slats so he could not bend either elbow to bring the food to his mouth. It broke my heart to hear the tortured groans of these poor people as they held their food so near but could not consume it.\
Next I went to visit Heaven. I was surprised to see the same setting I had witnessed in Hell \'96 row after row of long tables laden with food. But in contrast to Hell, the people here in Heaven were sitting contentedly talking with each other, obviously sated from their sumptuous meal.\
As I came closer, I was amazed to discover that here, too, each person had his arms splinted on wooden slats that prevented him from bending his elbows. How, then, did they manage to eat?\uc0\u8232 As I watched, a man picked up his spoon and dug it into the dish before him. Then he stretched across the table and fed the person across from him! The recipient of this kindness thanked him and returned the favor by leaning across the table to feed his benefactor.\
I suddenly understood. Heaven and Hell offer the same circumstances and conditions. The critical difference is in the way the people treat each other.\
I ran back to Hell to share this solution with the poor souls trapped there. I whispered in the ear of one starving man,\'a0\'91You do not have to go hungry. Use your spoon to feed your neighbor, and he will surely return the favor and feed you.\'92\
\'91You expect me to feed the detestable man sitting across the table?\'92\'a0said the man angrily.\'a0\'91I would rather starve than give him the pleasure of eating!\'92\
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\f1 \cf2 When our attention shifts from worrying about ourselves to adding value to the lives of those around us and serving a greater cause, our inherent goodness rises to\'a0the\'a0surface. All becomes possible then.\
Good things become great in due course. Good people become great people with\'a0the\'a0passage of time. This is\'a0the\'a0natural progression. For, goodness does not focus on making a name but making a difference. And that\'92s what\'a0service\'a0does: it makes a difference.\
The ability to care for and serve others is what distinguishes an ordinary person from an enlightened one.\
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\f0 \cf2 Peace\
Swami\
\
Right to Dream\
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\f1 \cf2 It was an overwhelming feeling, something that stunned me and almost sent me in a trance.\
Last month, on 19-Dec, I had the honor of\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "https://www.facebook.com/dr.a.samanta/posts/1444192999022982"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 addressing 10,000+}}\'a0children gathered in one giant hall. It was the largest assembly I had addressed till date. And no, it was not the size of the audience that my eyes welled up. Nor was it the fact that those children gave a thunderous applause when I entered. It was something entirely different. Read on.\
In 1992, a simple man who had grown up in abject poverty with a widowed mother and seven siblings took an unconventional step. He was 27 years old at the time, an age when most of us are thinking about our material goals, an age when it\'92s hard to see past our own desires, when parents are asking about your plans of getting married and settling down and all that. And yet, he quit his job as a Chemistry teacher in a private college and traveled to the innermost regions of his home state, Odisha.\
The idea was very simple: make quality education accessible to the poorest of the poor.\
He brought 12 tribal children with him after giving many assurances to their parents most of whom spoke in a local dialect and did not even know Odiya, the language of the state, or any other official Indian language. He took responsibility for their safety, meals, accommodation, uniforms and education.\
Fast forward to 2018. 25 years later, Prof. Achyuta Samanta\'92s Kalinga Institute of Social Sciences, or KISS as it\'92s commonly known, houses 27,000 tribal children where they are educated from kindergarten to all the way to post graduation. KISS provides free meals, accommodation, education, uniforms, medical facilities to everything else you can imagine under the sun including churning out international rugby players.\
Prof. Samanta didn\'92t just stop at that. Alongside, he built another organization called KIIT (Kalinga Institute of Industrial Technology) where 27,000 paying students are enrolled in various courses. Campus spread over 400 acres. 54,000 students combined (in both KISS and KIIT). 12,000 staff. All from one person\'92s dream and relentless action.\
\'93For every one student enrolled in KIIT,\'94 Prof. Samanta told me, \'93we induct one tribal student in KISS. Income from KIIT is used to fund KISS.\'94\
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{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "https://www.facebook.com/dr.a.samanta/posts/1445816238860658"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 Meeting Achyuta Samanta}}\'a0was a heartwarming experience as he radiated love, wisdom and humility. Till date he lives in a two-bedroom rented house I was told. Never marrying, he has devoted his life to elevate the lives of hundreds of thousands of young children.\
I was amazed to see the discipline and responsiveness of the children. Throughout my speech, every time I asked them a question to ensure they were with me, they answered promptly and correctly. They understood my message, humor and stories.\
\'93It is not your but my pleasure and privilege to be here,\'94 I said to the children. \'93Your mere sight is inspiring me to do more for our world. I thank you, your parents and your teachers.\'94\
\'93Everyone who takes birth is blessed with three basic rights,\'94 I added. \'93Life may not seem fair but no one can take these three rights away from you. The right to dream, the right to choose and the right to act. Dream with open eyes. Make mindful choices and act responsibly.\'94\
The purpose of this post is not to glorify Prof. Samanta, for people like him are beyond endorsements or odes. They are their own makers who cut through adversities like stone through water. Instead, I just wish to share with you how each one of us carries within us a seed of greatness. It is up to us whether we resign to our fate or rewrite it.\
It all starts with a dream but at first, a real dream is not always a grand vision. Google, Facebook or Microsoft founders, when starting out, never thought they would end up building mammoth organizations. Often, the beginning is just a tiny matter you care about, something that\'92s close to your heart. As you continue to work with persistence and sincerity, your dream grows with you. You begin to gain the wisdom to see what all is needed to realize your dream. That, many things must come together for something to take place. Which of the following you think is required to realize a dream?\
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Hard work\
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Destiny\
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Courage\
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Competence\
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All of the above\
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\cf2 The truth is that these are merely the ingredients of success and on their own, ingredients alone don\'92t make a great dish. It is also the recipe, portioning, presentation, ambience, whether it\'92s Beethoven or Bollywood songs playing in the background and so on. Together they influence our overall experience and eventually contribute to how delicious a preparation might taste. In other words, I am suggesting that it\'92s only when we create the right conditions that our dreams begin to materialize.\
If you focus on creating a conducive environment, achieving the desired outcome is only a matter of time then. I remember watching countless birds perch on the trees I see from my window. When it was spring, they came, sang, chirped, played on tender new leaves, butterflies and bees sat on blooming flowers, the grass was green as were the trees. Birds of beautiful color and tiny wings came. I did nothing special to invite those birds except that for the last two years, we had been tending to the health of flora around my cottage. We focused on creating the right conditions and Nature took care of the rest.\
In a family or an organization, if you want to encourage truth and transparency, you have to create an environment that supports it. Whatever we want to boost, we have to encourage it. Therefore, when you are working towards your dream, all you have to do is to be mindful and ask yourself, \'93this step I\'92m about to take, is it taking me away from or towards my dream?\'94\
One baby step followed by another, by another and yet another\'85this continues till one day you walk into your dream, when all that you dreamed once is now around you in the real world. That unreal feeling you get when you climb the Mount Everest, that Samadhi a yogi attains after years of yogic discipline, that moment when a founder-CEO rings the opening bell on the Wall Street to mark the IPO of her company\'85\

\i That\'92s one small step for a man and a giant leap for mankind. ~Neil Armstrong
\i0 \
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\i \cf5 My gratitude to the phenomenal\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "https://twitter.com/arunbothra"}}{\fldrslt \cf6 Mr. Arun Bothra}}\'a0and his loving family who left no stone unturned in organizing a highly productive stay in Odisha and took care of every little detail. Through him alone, I had the chance to meet the wonderful children at KISS.
\i0 \cf2 \
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Shedding Your Past\
\'93I want to change but my past haunts me, Swami,\'94 a visitor said to me recently. \'93I constantly feel guilty for my sins. How do I get rid of my baggage?\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93Two things will follow you to your grave,\'94 I replied. \'93Wanna guess?\'94\u8232 \'93My karma?\'94\u8232 \'93And creditors,\'94 I joked. \'93One comes with baggage and the other with a bag.\'94 He laughed a nervous laugh.\u8232 \'93One is debt,\'94 I added, \'93and the other a debt-collector.\'94\
Our baggage is our unpaid debt.\
And in our life, we attract all sorts of people, some of whom are karmic creditors and they play the role of debt-collectors. That is not to say that there\'92s no way of shedding our past.\
Out of ignorance or arrogance, we all seem to have said or done things we wish we hadn\'92t. Doing bad karma does not necessarily make one bad though. Often, good people end up doing bad things and the so called bad people do plenty of good too. A mere bad thought or action does not make you inferior. Instead, what shows inferiority of consciousness is when we don\'92t have the courage to admit that yes I messed up and I am sorry about it.\
Denial or non-admission of our mistakes creates more baggage than anything else. The moment we accept our fault gracefully, we flush out of our system the emotions of anger (why did I have to be in that situation?) and guilt (why couldn\'92t I act differently?). No doubt that the incident may still remain etched on your mind for a long time, but its recollection does not wreck your peace anymore.\
In\'a0
\i The Way of Chuang Tzu
\i0 , Thomas Merton cites a beautiful story called Flight from Shadow:\
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\f2 \cf3 There was a man who was so disturbed by the sight of his own shadow and so displeased with his own footsteps that he determined to get rid of both. The method he hit upon was to run away from them.\
So he got up and ran. But every time he put his foot down there was another step, while his shadow kept up with him without the slightest difficulty.\
He attributed his failure to the fact that he was not running fast enough. So he ran faster and faster, without stopping until he finally dropped dead.\
He failed to realize that if he merely stepped into the shade, his shadow would vanish, and if he sat down and stayed still, there would be no more footsteps.\
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\f1 \cf2 Call it our past, baggage, our shadow or anything else, the fact is we can\'92t really undo our actions. We can\'92t take back uttered words or undesirable actions. At the most, we can apologize, repent, regret or even heal over time. The truth remains that our past travels with us wherever we go. Only when we are in dark, our shadow merges with the darkness around it. In such darkness, we may momentarily feel that we have no baggage but that\'92s an illusion because we have not got rid of the darkness. Instead, we have hidden ourselves from light.\
Even the most lit room has a dark corner, however small it may be. Similarly, even the best lived life hides in its heart a darkness of some kind. That\'92s our shadow, we can\'92t get rid of it and we have absolutely no reason to be afraid of it. We are beings of light and therefore shadow is inseparable from our existence. What matters not is how long or dark our shadow but where it is: in front of us or behind us.\
One way to have respite from your shadow, as Chuang Tzu contended, is to step into the shade. The tree of grace has that shade as does the tree of truth and forgiveness. The shade of these trees softly absorbs the shadow of the person underneath.\
Another way, often tempting, is to be in the dark and live in it. In darkness, while you may not see the shadow, you won\'92t see much else either\'85no beauty, no light. Millions around us choose to shut themselves from everyone and everything. Due to fear, paranoia, guilt and other feelings, they spend an entire lifetime in dark just to avoid a shadow. The wise one, however, knows better.\
It\'92s only when our shadow is in front that the path ahead appears dark. And, our shadow is ahead of us when we turn our back towards light. When you walk towards light, your shadow will go behind you. It will no longer obscure your path with darkness.\
And that\'92s just about the only method I know of dropping our baggage: we must journey towards light with hope and compassion for ourselves and others. This is the only way to leave our shadow behind us. Forgive yourself for the mistakes of the past. Go easy. This will do you much good and will help you do good for others, which in the longer run can only ever be a good thing.\
If you keep walking your footprints will be behind you. Stop and brood and you are right on them. Pretending that we are spotless like the fresh Himalayan snow, at some point in time, each one of us has cast stones at others. At times, we have been at the receiving end too. In the end, it matters not much so long as we put it behind us.\
I came across a nice little joke in\'a0
\i The Comic Teachings of Mulla Nasruddin
\i0 \'a0by Imam Jamal Rahman. Slightly edited:\
A mother brought her rude young son to Mulla, complaining that she was tired of his rebellious ways.\uc0\u8232 \'93Please,\'94 she said, \'93do something to put a little fear in his heart.\'94\u8232 \'93Right away,\'94 Mulla said confidently. \'93He\'92ll be docile as a cow in no time.\'94\
Mulla stared fiercely into the boy\'92s eyes and commanded him to listen to his mother. He contorted his face terribly and growled deeply. The whole act was so fearsome that the mother fainted and Mulla rushed out of the room. When she regained consciousness, she chided Mulla. \'93I asked you to frighten my son, not me!\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93Madam,\'94 Mulla replied, \'93when you invoke fear, it consumes everyone. It has no favorites. Why, I got so scared myself that I had to leave the room.\'94\
Our shadow, like fear, has no personal favorites. A hue of darkness arises naturally wherever a shadow falls. That\'92s why it\'92s all the more important that not only we make a commitment to face and walk into light but also inspire others to do the same. For, we may be bright as the mid-day sun, if people around us are living in darkness, their shadows will fall on our path. Be light and spread light.\'a0\'a0Moving in the direction of a noble aspiration, towards goodness and kindness is walking into light.\
Let the light of the heart merge with the infinite light around you. Darkness will not matter then. If anything, it will only give greater depth, purpose and meaning to your life.\
Keep walking\'85towards light.\
Peace Swami\
\
What makes a Relationship work\
Our world is made up of people. Usually our finest and worst memories have other people in them. You may desire luxury cars, beach houses, yachts and what not, ultimately though, you dream of sharing them with someone. Away from the madness that courses through the world, you may imagine running away or being by yourself on a remote island or in a Himalayan cave but eventually, your heart yearns to share your joys and sorrows with someone, that perfect person who is there for you, who understands you and so on.\
When love is such a fundamental and mutual requirement of human existence, have you then ever wondered that why do people struggle to be together or fall out so quickly?\
Let me share with you the story of one of our volunteers at the ashram. He along with many others spend a great deal of time here and keep a careful watch. A happy-go-lucky soul, I have seen him keeping the cats away from our kitchens, shooing the birds from trees whenever I sit in the garden, and scaring other dogs. We call him Mixoo because his face is jet black while the rest of his body is snow white.\
While Mixoo is adorable, he\'92s not exactly known for compassion or peace. The other day, someone caught him peeing at the towel of one of our monks. A towel that had been harmlessly drying in sun on a line and not hurting Mixoo in any way. When he was confronted, he wagged his tail, gave the most innocent look and walked away remorsefully. Only that the very next day, he was angling at a towel again.\
He was pulled up once more and thankfully Mixoo refrained from venturing into such leisurely expeditions after that. I\'92d come to accept everything about his behavior except his dominating other creatures in the ashram especially when I sat outside and fed them. Mixoo, however, wouldn\'92t stop eyeing and gorging on others\'92 share. As a result, I banned him for one week to come in my garden and be around during my lunch hour.\
One day, in Feb 2017, I was sitting under my favorite tree and my lunch was about to be served when Shamata Ma (one of my resident disciples) came and told me that Mixoo was no more.\
\'93What!\'94 I couldn\'92t believe my ears. \'93Just yesterday I scolded him and sent him away. He was perfectly fine and playful!\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93A snake bit him in the afternoon, Swamiji,\'94 Ma said. \'93We quickly got a taxi and rushed him to the hospital. The vet gave him an injection, put him on a drip and tried everything but unfortunately, he didn\'92t make it.\'94\u8232 Ma\'92s eyes were filled with tears. I suddenly lost my appetite and Mixoo kept flashing in front of me.\
My lunch was brought and I shared the sad news. A veil of sorrow covered our happiness like unexpected rainclouds on a sunny day. Everyone reminisced how Mixoo used to play and boss around. They recounted many funny stories and we all missed him too much. I rapped my knuckles for scolding him the day before. I remembered him going out of my garden sad. Lunch felt tasteless and the afternoon slow. The evening aarti in the temple was an ordinary affair. I couldn\'92t swallow the truth that we would not see Mixoo again.\
The next day, Swami Vidyananda came running to me most excitedly and said, \'93Swamiji! Mixoo is hale and hearty. He\'92s just fine!\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93But, Ma said he was taken to the hospital and treated and he couldn\'92t survive.\'94\u8232 \'93That was a different dog who had only just started coming here. Ma thought we called\'a0
\i him
\i0 \'a0Mixoo. He is naughty as ever. I just gave Mixoo bread with cream.\'94\uc0\u8232 I erupted in joy and went downstairs. There he was, wagging his tail vigorously. Looking at his shaking and swaying, one might even think his kundalini was awakened, if you see what I mean. I waved him down and he came running and began rolling on the grass in front of me.\
For the next two days, Mixoo was treated like a VIP (Very Important Pet), a celebrity, and every resident of the ashram was elated and fed him all kinds of delicacies. I am sure that he was confused at the sudden display of this great love and attention. He must be thinking, \'93What did I do? What\'92s wrong with these guys? I hope they know that I am\'a0
\i Mixoo
\i0 . The Mixoo. Why me? Why now? Truly, humans are nuts, I tell you. A crazy bunch. Fried with me one day and drooling over the next. What\'92s going on!\'94 I could not only understand his confusion but appreciate it too.\
He was preferred over all the other mongooses, cats and other dogs for the next many days. And it drove home a beautiful lesson: sometimes, you don\'92t know how much you love someone until they walk out. Often, we take the presence of our loved ones for granted. When two people get used to each other, everything between them becomes a kind of norm: love, care, respect, affection and so on. While it\'92s a good thing, it has its downside too: when something becomes normal for us, we often stop valuing it. We start to feel that we no longer have to work on ourselves or on our relationships, that those good feelings will always remain. What had been a privilege, a blessing, all along is now seen as a right. Soon, such sense of entitlement creates expectations. Unfulfilled expectations, in turn, are the root cause of all sore relationships.\
When two people grow apart, both start to focus on the negatives of each other. We only see Mixoo bossing around or marking towels and then one day when we can\'92t see him anymore, we find the same aspects naughty, even cute. All real and mature relationships undergo a phase of crisis when everything you know is challenged. In fact, it is only in stress that you really get to know how fragile or strong a relationship is. And, there\'92s only one thing that sets apart the couple who are celebrating their golden jubilee from the one who are fighting in a court within months of marriage. That is: in a healthy relationship, you focus on the positives in the other person while in a negative one, you do the opposite. When you focus on what\'92s good than what\'92s bad, you naturally learn to value what all is there. And when you truly value something, you work hard to protect it.\
During a heavy downpour that flooded the streets and looked nothing short of a deluge from the time of Noah, a man entered a bakery. His umbrella was battered in the stormy rain and he was completely soaked.\uc0\u8232 \'93One bagel with cream cheese,\'94 the man said.\u8232 \'93Just one?\'94 the baker asked, surprised to see a customer at this hour.\u8232 \'93Yes.\'94\u8232 \'93You must really love my bagels!\'94\u8232 \'93I don\'92t eat bagels. It\'92s to go.\'94\u8232 \'93Oh,\'94 the baker said, \'93is it for your wife?\'94\u8232 \'93You think my mother would send me out in this weather for a bagel?\'94\
It is easy to get carried away and think me-me-me, but a functional relationship is about a lot of patience, mutual care and respect. With such traits blossom the wild flower of love, spreading its fragrance all around, making life more beautiful and worthwhile. Since no man\'92s an island and considering that our memories, thoughts, desires and dreams have other people in them, we may as well value the people we already have in our lives. For, you always value what you truly love. And the only way to keep love is to love back. Love begets love.\

\i (By the way, just two days ago, I saw Mixoo sauntering about the river side without a care in the world.)
\i0 \
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The Basis of Honor\
Brahma Dutt had been serving the state for forty years and was the most trusted minister in the royal court of Kashi. The king not only consulted him on all important matters but also doted on him to the extent that Brahma Dutt often dined with the royal family. He had full access to the king\'92s private chambers. The courtiers respected him for his uprightness and the subjects of Kashi revered him for his wisdom.\
One day, the security guard of the treasury noticed Brahma Dutt pocketing a few gold coins without recording it in the ledger. He mentioned it to the security chief who instantly dismissed the complaint saying that the honorable minister must be in a rush or the guard, mistaken. A couple of days later, the same thing happened again: Brahma Dutt stole more coins and once again the complaint was dismissed. When the guard reported the occurrence the third time, two new watchmen were deployed on the post. They too confirmed that Brahma Dutt routinely pinched a handful of coins from the royal depository.\
They brought the matter to the king\'92s attention who chastised them for doubting someone as virtuous as Brahma Dutt. This did not deter the security guards from doing their job, however, and eventually they caught him red-handed one day when once again he walked out with a small bag of gold coins without documenting it.\
\'93How dare you touch me?\'94 Brahma Dutt shouted as soon as the guards nabbed him. \'93Don\'92t you know who I am?\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93You may be whoever but right now, you are a thief,\'94 the security chief said. \'93Better cooperate or you\'92ll be sorry.\'94\
Brahma Dutt tried to wriggle out of the situation but the guards were unrelenting and after making a forceful arrest, they presented him to the king like a petty criminal.\
\'93What do you have to say in defense?\'94 The king asked Brahma Dutt after hearing the facts.\uc0\u8232 \'93Nothing, Your Majesty.\'94\u8232 \'93Throw this crook in the prison,\'94 he ordered. \'93I\'92ll announce the full sentence within a week.\'94\u8232 The king was distraught to know that the man he had trusted all his life turned out to be a corrupt official. He stripped the royal insignia off Brahma Dutt\'92s jacket and adjourned the court. The news spread like wildfire and people called Brahma Dutt a thief, rogue, scoundrel and many other things.\
\'93Is everything alright?\'94 the queen asked when she saw the king roaming about in his chamber in the middle of the night. \'93You seem rather worried.\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93I can\'92t fathom that someone like Brahma Dutt could stoop so low and betray me,\'94 the king said and narrated the entire incident.\u8232 \'93So, he said nothing in his defense? Really?\'94\u8232 \'93Not a word.\'94\u8232 \'93Well,\'94 she counseled, \'93there must be more to his act than meets the eye. You must speak with Brahma Dutt privately. Someone like him wouldn\'92t need to pilfer petty amounts, don\'92t you think?\'94\
Before announcing the sentence, the king confronted Brahma Dutt in private and said to him, \'93How could a wise and reputed man like you do that! You served my father, as a child I played in your lap. You could have asked me for the money or for a loan.\'94\
\'93Your Majesty, not a penny has been misappropriated. I had already put the money out of my pocket before I started taking it out a little bit every day. You can have it checked. It was a simple experiment.\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93This is not the time for riddles, old man,\'94 the king said impatiently. \'93Speak clearly.\'94\u8232 \'93Lately, I had started wondering,\'94 Brahma Dutt replied, \'93that, what did you really like about me? Was it my wisdom, my long years of service, my unbiased advice, my reputation or what? I wanted to know what the courtiers and the people of Kashi respected me for?\'94\u8232 \'93All of that perhaps.\'94\u8232 \'93I agree. But,\'94 Brahma Dutt continued, \'93none of that could save me, O King! One small act of misconduct and I was promptly labeled a cheat and scoundrel and what not. I have come to the conclusion that it was my conduct alone that earned me the respect. The moment my conduct was questionable, everything else ceased to matter.\'94\
I find in this story a lifetime\'92s worth of wisdom. Our conduct is our first introduction of our education, upbringing and character. There are always people out there who are more talented, skilled, knowledgeable and intelligent than us. Those who exceed us in looks, wealth and achievements. In the grand scheme of things, however, none of that really matters. It makes little or no difference to others that how long you may have served them or how true your intentions or high your IQ, what ultimately matters is that how noble is your conduct.\
Sure, we earn respect based on how much or what all we know and have, but such honor is based on the assumption that beneath our attainments rests good conduct. No one respects (maybe out of fear but not intrinsically) a gangster like they would a saint. If you examine the lives of Rama, Buddha, Mahavira, Christ or Muhammad, you\'92ll discover it\'92s not that they gave truths to the world that the sages or prophets before them had failed to impart. The world knew already most of what they shared. Instead, it was their conduct that accorded them an immortal status in human history.
\f3 \cf7 \cb8 \
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Whatever be the conduct of a great man (or woman), common people tend to follow that. The world tries to reach the benchmark set by great people with their exemplary conduct.\
\
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\f1 \cf2 \cb1 Conduct, in my view, has three aspects. One, how we carry ourselves and consequently behave with others. Two, how truthful our actions are vis-a-vis our words or promises. And three, how we act under all circumstances. Whether facing adversities, battling temptations or rolling in wealth, somewhere it\'92s our conduct alone that represents who or what we carry inside.\
Like a good conductor effortlessly directs a group of artists producing soulful music that melts and moves us, our mind conducts the ensemble of our thoughts, words and actions. When they are in harmony, the orchestra of life comes alive with beautiful music. But, when each one is playing in a different key and tempo, oblivious to the instructions of the conductor, indifferent to the music of others, all that comes out is cacophonous noise.\
\'93What would be my worth if I were a slave?\'94 the king asked Mulla Nasruddin.\uc0\u8232 \'93It\'92s impossible to imagine, His Excellency.\'94\u8232 \'93Still, I insist. Make a guess. Say a figure.\'94\u8232 \'93With or without your royal robes and embellishments?\'94 Mulla asked.\u8232 \'93With everything on my person as it is.\'94\u8232 \'93Around nine hundred dinars.\'94\u8232 \'93That\'92s ridiculous, Mulla,\'94 the king yelled. \'93My clothes alone are worth that much.\'94\u8232 \'93His Excellency!\'94 Mulla said. \'93I\'92ve already factored all that in.\'94\
Without gentle words, noble intentions and truthful actions, we are worth no more than the sum total of our possessions. The journey from humanity to divinity is paved with good conduct. People may want us for what we do for them, they may respect us for what we have, ultimately though, they love us for how we make them feel. And, how we make others feel is almost entirely dependent on our conduct.\'a0It\'92s as simple as that.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\u8232 \
My Truth\
t\'92s been a while since I last wrote. I am ready to share some information with you all. Here\'92s all about my abouts (how, when, where, what) in the three periods of time. I will try to keep it short.\
On the afternoon of 15th March 2010, I left for my spiritual journey. I went to Varanasi. By 18th March, I had found my guru 80 kilometers north of Varanasi in a little village. He initiated me into sanyasa on the 11th of April. My guru is a Naga saint, seventy five years of age. I left his ashram four months later because I had renounced to seek my own truth; he wanted me to look after his properties and take his seat. I did not want to manage a \'93spiritual business\'94. I came to the Himalayas. Six kilometers further north of Badrinath on the way to Neelkanth, I found a suitable cave on a mountain summit called Narayana Parvata. It had breathtaking view of several waterfalls, multiple water streams and the incomparable pristine purity of the Himalayas. I did two important sadhanas there.\
Two months later, after completing my sadhanas, I went to the abode of lord Jaganatha (Puri). I spent nearly two weeks in Orissa ineffectually searching for a suitable seaside location. I came back to the Himalayas. This time I selected an even more remote location in the Himalayan woods. I will vivify the place in detail some other time. In short, it was simply majestic.\'a0 Regularly sojourned by such wild animals as deer, boars, bears and monstrous rodents, it had a splendid view. It was like Nature\'92s golf course. I started my sadhana there on the 19th of November. I came down for a day to send you folks an email on the 27th December before starting my most important sadhana on the 5th Jan. It lasted for 150 days. Meditation and related activities took 17 hours of time. I will elaborate more on that upon my return. With divine grace, it got completed successfully. In the last 100 days of my sadhana was complete isolation and solitude, even from my own thoughts. The outcome has left me fulfilled.\
I can not give my present whereabouts. But I am happy and safe and in total bliss. Bliss that pervades my entire being almost all the time. I have learned to maintain my meditative state irrespective of the state of the world outside, at any point in time that is. I am moving onto my next and final destination of my spiritual journey.\
My next and concluding sadhana is more a test than an actual sadhana. My core and mainstream sadhana is complete. I have found what I was looking for. It has dawned. I get it now. It is all crystal clear. I got an unambiguous vision of my deity on 13th Feb and then again on May 11. The extraordinary bliss that permeated my whole body thereafter stays with me all the time. I can go back into that experience anytime at will. A one-off fleeting experience that you can not replicate is of little use if any. If we have experienced something as a result of our efforts, we should be able to experience it repeatedly at will. If we have followed our approach systematically, the same experience should occur each time on providing the same conditions. Anyway, I will write more on it later after my return. After completing my concluding sadhana, I will come back and see you all. I will disclose my return date at the end of this email. Before that, I would like to share with you the essence of my findings. As follows:\
Buddha propounded that there is no God or supreme creator. Krishna declared that He is the God. Einstein said that everything is the sum total of energy. Meera found her truth in Krishna, Ramakrishna Parmahansa in Kali, Tulsidasa in Rama, Sankracarya in the formless and many others found there own versions of the truth. Most people agree that kama, krodha, ahamkara etc are not good for them; why do they still engage in them? I wanted to experience my own truth. I am at complete loss of words to put my experience and my current state in words.\
Self realization is no serendipity. It is not an aha moment. Intellectual comprehension of such realization may well be an epiphany, the actual realization is far from it. Self realization can be achieved by anyone who is willing to put in the effort. Dawning of such realization will leave you with only answers. You will no longer have any questions. Intellectually, you may understand the underlying philosophy or doctrinal principles but such an understanding may only make you more rigid. You will end up merely subscribing to a theory with no confirmation about its validity.\
If you believe that the Divine has a form, you can see his form in this very lifetime. If you believe that the Divine is formless, you can experience deep absorption (
\i samadhi
\i0 ) in the foreseeable future. That is what I experienced multiple times. Your world is made up of your thoughts. If your world has a God in it and all your thoughts, all the time, are about Him, His very form will manifest before you. If your world has bliss and all your thoughts, all the time, are focused on such bliss you will experience such bliss. That is a tough ask though because a perfectly stable and still mind is required to meditate on one thought for prolonged periods. It can be achieved with an initial intense effort.\
Just like a neo literate finds it hard to read but achieves proficiency over time, you will encounter numerous hurdles on the way. If you stay course, you will most definitely get to the destination. I have come to know that if you do\'a0
\i bhakti\'a0
\i0 or\'a0
\i dhayana\'a0
\i0 incorrectly, you are not going to ever get to the destination. You will not feel any of the things various scriptures or exegetical texts state regarding blissful experiences or similar other extraordinary claims. If you can do it correctly, you can experience and bring forth your divine side in a short time frame. I have to declare though that it requires a super intense effort.\
I will elucidate my version of what is \'93correct\'94 upon my return. The truth is very simple and you all know it too. But experiencing it is an entirely different ballgame. Most people know right from wrong, yet why do they find themselves engaging in unscrupulous and undesirable acts repeatedly? That is because their mind is not tamed. A restless mind and its modifications (
\i citta vritti
\i0 ) drive them towards experiencing and enjoying the world through their body alone. Purity of discipline, whether in\'a0
\i bhakti\'a0
\i0 or in\'a0
\i dhyana\'a0
\i0 can help you tame your mind. You will then experience an indescribable, incessant flow of bliss. I used to read about it and had some experiences far and few in between. The actual sustained experience of\'a0
\i samadhi\'a0
\i0 is an incredible one. The bliss stays with you all the time with very little effort afterwards.\
I would like to elucidate the difference between intellectual comprehension of the truth and actually experiencing it. Suppose that someone is suffering from cataract. That person is aware of his visual impairment. Is that awareness adequate to correct his vision? He knows where the problem is and he knows that the resultant effect is his inability to see correctly. He is also aware that undergoing a procedure to remove the cataract will fix his vision. Intellectually, he gets it. He understands it. That awareness does not help him in seeing unhindered though. His impairment is not the result of any intellectual\'a0 malfunction. Therefore it can not be fixed with any intellectual comprehension or correction. He must undergo the procedure to correct his vision. Similarly, your distorted view of the world or your deluded mind (
\i citta
\i0 ) is not an intellectual problem.\
Subscribing to any philosophy or believing a certain theory to be the truth \'96 both of which are functions of the mind \'96 is not going to help you uncover your true self let alone any\'a0
\i samadhi\'a0
\i0 or a\'a0
\i darsana\'a0
\i0 of your deity. The most beautiful thing is that you can experience your true nature and you can experience that incessant flow of bliss by taming your mind. A mind that\'92s not settled and under complete control will render you unable to perform devotional service (
\i bhakti
\i0 ) or meditation (
\i dhayana
\i0 ) correctly and purely. In the absence of such purity, you are unlikely to experience anything profound. Once you are able to replicate your experience, your world will change for ever. You would have turned inwards. Completely. You will go through three stages as follows:\
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\f4 \cf9 Dependent\
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\f1 \cf2 This is the first stage. You are dependent on the world for everything. Their comments or criticism arouse positive or negative emotions in you. Their presence or absence makes you feel good or bad. Their actions can give you fulfillment or grief. In essence, your world of thoughts has a lot of people. As a result your world revolves around them. You can not live in solitude. Once you start to turn inwards and inculcate morality in absolutely everything you do with purity of your worldly, spiritual and moral discipline, you will move to stage two.\
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\f4 \cf9 Self-dependent\
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\f1 \cf2 With unfailing morality and purity of discipline, you will start to form your own view. A view about yourself and your world. A view that will remain mostly unmoved by what others think of you. They will still, however, be able to dictate often how you feel about yourself. As you become increasingly self-dependent, you will find solitude a reasonable companion. Someone you don\'92t mind spending some time with occasionally. Your state of mind starts to acquire some stability where you find yourself enjoying most of the things you have to do. However, whenever off-guard your inner world is still overcome by restless thoughts and senses. Your view of the world is still conceptualized based on your acquisition of second hand knowledge. As you begin to get glimpses into your true nature and continue relentlessly, not recklessly, towards self purification, you will move to stage three.\
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\f4 \cf9 Independent\
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\f1 \cf2 You experience an unceasing bliss that permeates your being. You exude radiance and you no longer have any confusions about anything at all. It all makes sense to you now. The realization has dawned on you. You are no longer driven by your mind.You have a still mind with no thoughts and you develop super awareness and super consciousness. Once you discover the pristine purity of your mind, you will understand and know the reality of everything around you. By the time you cross this stage, you will have an answer for everything. You will find yourself unaffected by the worldly emotions. You no longer have any inclination for worldly enjoyments nor are you left with any cravings of any nature. Even your spiritual experiences cease to hold much meaning. You become independent. And that is your true nature. Always in a state of bliss, everything you undertake leads to the same outcome \'97 bliss. Your vision of your deity and your state of\'a0
\i samadhi\'a0
\i0 will not leave you at anytime. Everyone around will experience bliss too, just like everyone under the sun is basked in the sunlight indiscriminately. Whenever you will look at anything or anyone, they will only come across as pure bliss.\
I have come to experience that you can get to stage three and beyond in a short time frame, in this very lifetime. It does not come easy though. An intense effort with the right conditions and balance is required. I may write on it some day in the future in detail. This email is neither the right forum nor the appropriate medium to elaborate my truth. I have shared the vital details with you nevertheless.\
It is no longer a phantom. There is nothing I seek now. I no longer have anything I would like to accomplish or do. For the sake of my vow (
\i sankalpa
\i0 ) and to put my truth to test, I have to spend some more time in solitude. I am more than willing to share my version of the truth with you should you wish to experience the bliss that you perhaps have come to believe as mere allegory in the present times.\
How much longer are you going to go through the unnecessary slog? Do you intend to keep driving to the supermarket till the licensing authority refuses to renew your license on account of your inability to check the blind spot? Are you going to continue to pretend that is how life is supposed to be? Are you waiting for something or someone? How much longer are you going to continue sipping the distasteful instant coffee? Are you going to continue building your world around people? Are you going to get old and be contented with mere phone calls from your children?\
One day you will be woken up from your sleep by a knock audible to you alone. That knock will be the one to put you to the ultimate sleep. At that moment, you will realize that you have already had your last meal, your last phone call, your last email, your last sleep, your last bath and your last conversation. Someone else is having the last word though. It won\'92t be yours. Your preference to stay or go will be mercilessly ignored.\
I am not suggesting that you renounce the world. On the contrary, I am imploring you to learn to live. Gracefully, peacefully, blissfully with the right view of the world and with your own version of the truth. You live in your own house, you wear your own clothes, you do your own job, you drive your own car, but your view of the world and your view of yourself is not your own. It is affected constantly by the world around you. It does not need be that way.\
When you discover your true nature, you become a renunciate even amidst all worldly activities. You can continue your present lifestyle and ride an emotional roller coaster rather frequently or you can experience and expose your divine side. No matter how novice or expert the surfer, they can keep waiting for the best swell or start riding the waves. What matters is that you atleast make a sincere, sustained, persistent and serious attempt. Just look around you. There is so much clutter. Do you need that in your life? Remove the clutter inside you and the outside will start clearing itself. Remove the clutter outside you and your inner cleansing will begin automatically. Live your own life with others, but not induced by them. Your own version. You will be amazed at the discovery of your own truth. It will leave you flabbergasted, spellbound, dumbfounded and completely fulfilled. You will stand delivered.\
This life is like a long drive. There may be some diversions along the way, some stop signs, a probable speeding ticket (or two), some traffic slow-downs, some beautiful scenes along the way, a couple of pit stops, sometimes a breakdown too\'85you keep moving till you get to the destination and then you want to get back home. You come to understand that getting to the destination was not as important as enjoying the ride for a destination is merely another stop. Go on enjoy! But by turning inwards. The drive outside is an illusion, the one inside could not be more real. The one outside is like traffic moving around you whereas the one inside is you driving your own car. You can change course and drive off-peak hours or take a different motorway with much less traffic. The decisions you make inside will change the world outside you. I would like to bring the subject matter to a close for now before this email turns into a scroll. After I complete a couple of outstanding action items, I shall see you all. That should take place within this year. The two dates I have in mind presently are 9-10-11 (9 Oct) or 11-11-11 (11 Nov). That\'92s almost an entire year earlier than I had communicated earlier. I am looking forward to see you all and I am thankful to you all. I have got what I wanted. Upon getting it I realized I am what I wanted. Upon such realization it dawned on me that I am the realization. There was no I either thereupon. I will write to you again in the next few weeks. And I will certainly single out the date by August end and will communicate accordingly.\
I wish you all peace. Please expect to hear from me again soon.\
Please forward this message to all those who have expressed the desire to be included in the recipients list and to all those who you believe may be benefited by it in any way.\
Swami.\
\
Himalyan Expectation\
You know, everyone is carrying an invisible load. Since it is invisible, you remain unaware of such weight as well as oblivious to its continuous piling up. From the moment you can recall to the present one, it has been on your consciousness. As a result, you have accepted it implicitly like a citizen accepts the laws of the country of residence. It is an unequivocal, silent and unconditional acceptance. If you haven\'92t guessed it already, I am referring to the huge weight of expectations. You may believe that you don\'92t have any or that you have only the basic and realistic ones. Think again, I urge you, after going through the following section.\
Expectations are those desires you believe you have the right to see fulfilled. Due to your own conditioning by numerous factors, you develop expectations. They are the primary cause of all grief and stress. Desires, in turn, are those lingering thoughts that you don\'92t abandon. Those thoughts that you have pursued and followed; these are the building blocks of your world. Cemented in attachment, you keep erecting walls of desires around you eventually finding yourself completely trapped with no escape doors. It is a profound subject and I will cover it in detail at another time. For now, I will focus on the present topic of expectations. Expectations ruin your world while desires sustain it and thoughts create it. These all are products of the mind, generally a restless and ignorant mind. Expectations, I figure, are of three types. As follows:\
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\f4 \cf9 Expectations from self\
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\f1 \cf2 Based on your education,\'a0
\i samskara
\i0 , upbringing, your social circle and your professional life \'97 all of which play an important role in your conditioning \'97 you expect yourself to be a certain way before others. You have set for yourself certain benchmarks and standards derived out of information passed onto you in many forms; normally based on the religion you practice and the company you keep in addition to other social and personal factors. When these expectations, the ones you have from yourself, are not met, they give birth to shame and guilt. You feel low and tormented. In a state of as much denial as disbelief, you feel miserable and lost. The eternal you stays buried under these expectations majority of which is a big load of rubbish; putrefying garbage and nothing else. Filter them. Only keep the ones that strengthen your consciousness and make you a more compassionate person. Contemplate on what kind of a person you would like to be as opposed to how you would like to be seen as by others. You may gain an insight!\
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\f4 \cf9 Expectations from others\
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\f1 \cf2 These are the ones you justify and wrongly believe that you rightfully deserve. Whether it is reciprocation, love, things, words, gestures \'97 whatever they may be. Based on all that you have observed and absorbed, all that you have been told and taught, and all that you feel you have done, you desire a certain outcome, often favourable. And because you feel what you desire is legitimate, just and natural, you have added to the burden of expectations. With these, sometimes you are also able to put pressure on the one you expect from all the while increasing your own. When these expectations are not fulfilled, they give you grief and disappointment proportionate to the magnitude of your expectation. Make a list of all the people you care about and what all you expect from them. When done, know that they expect just as much from you. You relinquish yours and with your purified energy they will accept you the way you are gradually lowering their own expectations from you. That\'92s how nature works. Don\'92t just take my word for it; try it and see it for yourself.\
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\f4 \cf9 Others\'92 from you\
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\f1 \cf2 These are designed to give you stress. You are under constant pressure from peers, bosses, friends and family. You have laid your burden on them and they, on you. Beyond the most basic ones, rest all can be dumped. Whether you fulfill their expectations or not, awareness alone is sufficient to condition you and disturb your already perturbed state of mind. When you are clear about the first ones (from yourself) and are able to let go off the second ones (from others), these ones will disappear automatically. Your new found individuality will silently condition others and their expectations.\
Do what you may; you must never part with morality. It is the foundation of bliss, the mother of all virtues. A virtuous life, however busy or entangled it may be, will always result in peace.\
After writing my last post in June, I traveled to Kamakhya (Eastern India \'96 Assam). I had to complete an important initiatory process there. I had the time and opportunity to visit Buddhist monasteries in various regions. Most of them are beautifully set in the living mountains flourishing with flora wonderful past describing. My visits only reaffirmed my own thinking that any attempt to institutionalize spirituality will result into a religion, like any other, with greater emphasis on execution than exploration. The soul of spirituality leaves when labeled as religion. Busy doing than discovering, the lamas were engrossed in following tradition than finding truth.\
In the spirit of an itinerant ascetic, I ranged the Eastern Himalayas before parking myself in a near perfect cottage tucked away in the woods. Though not as sequestered as my previous locations, it was utterly quiet and serene still. I sat there for a month long mantra sadhana. Ah! What sheer joy!\
You have to experience the Himalayan solitude to know what I mean. It is only in solitude that you will discover the drift of your thoughts and the nature of your mind. You discover true beauty. And, beauty does not lie in the eyes of the beholder but in the mind of the perceiver. The cleaner the mind, the greater the beauty, and the quieter the mind, the longer lasting the experience. An empty mind is not a devil\'92s workshop; a passionate mind is. An empty mind, in its own right, is but a divine blessing.\
A quiet mind that has discovered its own nature will set you free. When was the last time you felt free? Like, really free? Free like the rivers that flow unattached, like the wind that simply can not be bound, like the bird soaring high in the sky or like a mendicant who has discarded the worldly ways and has shaken off fear, guilt, shame and traditions that had soiled his consciousness earlier?\
A concluding thought, born out of dental hygiene:\uc0\u8232 Life\'92s like a toothpaste. Initially, it feels full and plenty. The feeling stays until the first few uses. Thereafter, its shape takes a dent. With each subsequent squeeze, you find yourself adjusting its shape, especially if you are someone with attention to detail. Barely do you reach midway, you now have to squeeze bottom up each time. Before you know it, you are at the end of it. But just when you think you are done with it, you squeeze harder and some more comes out. One is rarely out of toothpaste altogether. The last few uses give you the opportunity to buy a new one before you run out of luck with the current one that is now looking flat like a man under debt or expectations!\
Similarly, life feels long, full and plenty at first. Childhood years go by real fast. Afterwards, it is mostly about adjustments before you find yourself at the end of it squeezing harder. But a new body awaits you after you discard this one much like the toothpaste. Life is what you make of it. With nuclear energy in the nucleus of every cell in your body, there are billions in you, it is your choice whether you leave it buried for the fear of radioactivity, or make a nuclear reactor of great utility, or if you let your dark side rule you and make instruments of destruction. The choice is yours.\
Go on enjoy! Squeeze the best, not the hell, out of life. Drop your worries for what is in the book of fate must come to pass. Let go off the meaningless struggle. Watch every moment unfold. Discover the inner ambrosial reservoir of eternal youth, beauty, bliss and joy. Share your life like you share the toothpaste but be yourself like the toothbrush you don\'92t share.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Bhakti\
Last week was packed with action. I met a lot of people, gave discourses and enjoyed Kirtan. People poured in everyday and sang bhajans for hours while I sat and enjoyed in ecstasy. I was deeply moved to see their devotion and love. Expressions of divine love in the form of tears, laughter, goose-bumps, trembling flowed freely as they sang in throaty, husky and melodious voices accompanied by music that accentuated the joy to rapturous levels. I am now proceeding to enjoy some company with \'93solitude\'94 while busying the body and prana in a yogic practice.I would like to elucidate the concept of bhakti, devotional service. The path of bhakti is not as arduous as dhyana, meditation. However, it requires complete surrender if you want to experience the truth with bhakti alone. Combined with the practice of dhyana, bhakti flourishes very quickly and yields amazing results. The system of nine forms of devotional service (navadha bhakti) is designed so that you can take your mind off all worldly matters and channelize your consciousness. This ultimate stage hardly comes easy though. An unstable mind will make you a victim of its restive tendencies vitiating your peace and quiet required to do devotional service correctly. There are three types of devotees (bhaktas). As follows:\
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\f4 \cf9 No Bhava\
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\f1 \cf2 This bhakta is the socialist type. He or She has no desire to serve God or humanity per se. They have mistaken religion for spirituality. Lured by lust and lucre, this bhakta is more worried about building temples, acquiring bigger premises for the religious institution, installation of more deities and holding processions in great fanfare. He will be on some temple committee busying himself with the mundane matters. People of similar mindset regard this individual as a great bhakta, while he believes himself to be the greatest. Otherwise living a debauched life, they expect a special place at each puja. In reality, these bhaktas have been unable to let go off their vikaras. Their lewd eyes look upon all women as objects of lust. Driven by their ego, they flair up at the slightest friction. Due to the deluded nature of their socio-religious practices, they count themselves among the greatest devotees of all times. Occasionally, they will entertain themselves and others by signing a bhajan or two. A bhakta of this nature is anything but that. They derive great pleasure in getting their feet touched and will lavishly blurt out hollow blessings no less than a siddha. Very prompt in offering advice, especially spiritual, they work very hard to push their opinion down your throat.\uc0\u8232 God has never manifested his form in the middle of any procession. He has never emerged out of some idol made from stone. He is in the stone too but the stone is not him. Bhaktas of this category are living in one great illusion. Only some divine intervention, also known as grace, can help them for they listen to no entreaty from anyone.\
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\f4 \cf9 Borrowed Bhava\
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\f1 \cf2 An overwhelming number of devotees fall under this category. This bhakta has not discovered his own truth yet. Their upbringing and second-hand knowledge has shaped them the way they are. He starts out based on a borrowed philosophy, further he borrows the method of worship, the prayers (stutis), devotional songs (bhajans), the associated practices; everything is borrowed. And unfortunately, they are handed down all that from those who have no direct experience themselves. The preachers either heard it from someone or read in some text belonging to an entirely different era, if not age. Ofcourse, they failed to ascertain the esoteric meaning, instead accepting it as told. This bhakta is devout in carrying out his daily practices. He believes that the idol is God! He fails to see his god in a child, in a needy person, in a dog or in a cockroach. He does not feel the pain of others; compassion and mercy are not to be found anywhere. He has come to believe, for reasons unknown to humanity, that his god is greatly pleased by his hollow acts of external worship. He is more worried about cleaning the altar outside than building an exquisite one inside. Many practitioners of various religions fall under this category. This bhakta will adopt morality at convenience and desert it when needed. Haunted by his desires, rage and ego continue to be his masters.\
Better than the first one, this bhakta still has some chance of realization provided morality becomes the foundation of his living and self purification, that of his life. Innate pure bhava will start to rise from the chambers of his heart elevating him.\
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\f4 \cf9 Own Bhava\
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\f1 \cf2 Bhakta of this highest type and a rarity, you have discovered your own truth. Much like Tulsidasa, Meera, Surdasa, Caitanya Mahaprabhu, Guru Nanak, you have turned inwards. You still worship your deity\'92s form outside but with your own bhava. Your acts of inward worship being projected outside are mistaken by onlookers as pure acts of outward worship. This leads to creation of sects further confusing the seekers. This bhakta has transcended the traditional rituals of external worship. Due to a highly virtuous life, and even higher righteous conduct, you have completely purified yourself. In essence, you have become the deity yourself. With child-like innocence and indifferent to the ways of the world, you spend your time in solitude. However, in solitude as well you are always in the company of your personal god. And even in the midst of greatest crowd, you are perfectly alone with your deity. Desires, therefore all vikaras, have completely left you, for, how can darkness and light coexist! You are the light, light of love, peace, bliss and knowledge. Because you have found your God, you develop great dispassion (vairagya) \'97 a natural by product of self-realization. You are ready to work some miracles and your mere presence will transform bhaktas of the first two types as well as others from different walks of life. Just like a student no longer has any use of the text books from the class he has already graduated; you have grown out of rituals and textual practices. For, who has found God by following such practices anyway?\
Bhakti is an act of devotional service, not demented rituals. It is okay to start with a borrowed bhava. With ever increasing purity and commitment imbued in your life and living, you will discover your true bhava before long. The hallmark of a great bhakta is unremitting vairagya and an even state of mind under most, if not all, circumstances. When you relinquish your desires effortlessly and they do not come back to you, a vision of your lord is imminent. You can eulogize feverishly or apologize fulsomely, if you are playing a beggar, you will only collect pennies. Become a worthy recipient and whatever, not whoever, it is that you want will land in your lap; thankfully, not literally.\
Bhakti when done with purity, surrender and vairagya, severs all fetters. It can not deliver you from your ripe karma (prarabdha) however. It will make you imperturbable though. There is no escape from the law of karma. Upon realization of your own bhava, you will gradually move to the ultimate stage \'96 parabhakti. I will write on it some other time.\
So, should you kill your desires and chant the holy names all the times, perhaps even renounce the material world? If you have come to that conclusion, either I could not have conveyed myself any worse or you could not have misunderstood any better. How can you kill the air? You can not curb or kill the desires, lest you erupt like a volcano. Continue to enjoy what life has to offer you within the bounds of morality. Work ceaselessly towards self purification. Along with, start bhakti if you believe in God and only if you can exercise surrender. Bhakti is rarely comparable to love-at-first-sight. It is more like a relationship where your love and bond with your deity grows over time. If you can not surrender, bhakti is not for you. In that case, you can start the practice of meditation and be prepared to bear the rigors of such practice. Only a strenuous effort is going to bring noticeable results. Do not even attempt to curb your desires without understanding their intrinsic nature first. They will go away automatically in due course with either pure bhakti or right meditation; combination of both will set you free in no time.\
Do not abandon external worship till you discover the inner one. Let the truth unfold steadily. When you continue to tread the path with grace, resolve and reverence, never foregoing truth, mercy, forgiveness and compassion, you will certainly come to grace. Have no doubts about that.\
Between slog and sloth, equidistant from indulgence and immolation, there lies the wondrous path of devotional service.\
In my next post, I will cover the subject of desires. If you are able to get a handle on that, you will experience radical and sweeping change in you. Stay tuned. Next post is going to be in the first week of October. I am going for my next sadhana that will not finish before September end.\
I am going to grab a bite now and on that note:\uc0\u8232 Life is like a thali meal. You are very hungry, that\'92s why you ordered it at the first place or perhaps it seemed economical or maybe it was the variety that lured you. Much like in life, you give yourself a series of reasons or excuses before you arrive at a decision. The thali comes before you. Wow! There is a bit of everything, more than half of which you least care about. Some dishes you have to suck on, others require chewing, some you drink and yet there are others you simply leave untouched. It is bedecked with mostly savoury items and a dessert if you got that deluxe thali.\
You go through the first few bites very quickly, each morsel one luxurious bite, before the law of diminishing returns kicks in. The subsequent bites fail to yield as much fulfillment as the previous ones. You no longer adorn each bite as lavishly with multiple curries as at the beginning. The charm is fast eloping. You are now engaged in a conversation, generally with yourself or your bite-buddy if you have company: ah! Why do these guys fry paneer! They should know it becomes hard and not as succulent. I should have ordered the extra chapattis instead of the rice. Look at this mixed veg, a huge piece of potato with just two pieces of cauliflower. This dal is a shocker etc.\
You saved the dessert for the last but now you are feeling full. You still have some of it, because you have paid for it you feel. You have been conditioned to not let go. Hands somewhat smudged in oil, if not smeared in curry, you lift that glass of water to quench your thirst. The residual oil in each bowl of curry gives you the unhealthy feeling. You wonder if you made the right choice. But it is all done now. What is noteworthy that in every likelihood you are going to order the same thali next time too.\
Similarly, life is all about choices. At first, the illusory and elusive pleasures of the world draw your attention like the variety in your thali. Eventually, you get tired \'97 not tired of enjoying them but tired of your inability to sustain such enjoyment, a subtle feeling of non-fulfillment does not leave you. You are unsure from what to keep versus what to rid of. Much like analyzing the thali, you keep analyzing the choices you make in life and you keep your engagement alive in wishful thinking on matters of the past and future. You save the best for the last, but when \'93last\'94 comes, you no longer have the appetite for it. Cravings of the tongue give way to the reality of digestion. At last what quenches your thirst is that glass of pure water. It has not nutritional value, neither a price tag nor any refill conditions. It is Nature\'92s offering and its purity is the primary factor in giving you that feeling of fulfillment.\
Go on enjoy! Order a thali. How about one for the soul too?\
Refill, anyone?\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The Desire Tree\
Just like moisture is inseparable from water, and, heat from light, desires are inseparable from mind. For, desires are but thoughts un-abandoned. Thoughts are just that \'97 thoughts. They are not good or bad, neither sublime or ridiculous, nor right or wrong. All such labels are mere designations you have given based on your conditioning. Intrinsically, thoughts are all the same \'97 identical. It is what you do with the thought that matters than the actual thought itself. Upon emergence of a thought, its pursuit will either take the form of a desire or an emotion, positive or negative. All karma originates from thoughts. A lingering thought destabilizes your mind, disturbing your state of tranquility like the ripple in a still pond. A quiet mind with purified self remains unaffected by the fulfillment or abandonment of desires; both outcomes are perceived by the mind anyway. So, whether you want sense gratification or gratifying recognition, satisfying love or a simple laddoo, there is no difference.\
While the law of karma cannot be discounted, you are doubtlessly a product of your own desires. Your desires prompt you to take action or tread a certain path. Before you can know the nature of your desires, you ought to understand the nature of your mind.\uc0\u8232 When a desire is fulfilled, it gives you temporary joy & pleasure. The outcome is as ethereal and elusive as the desire itself. If desires could be satisfied forever, it would not be fallacious to seek fulfillment. However, when fulfilled, countless more spring up. Once you understand the nature of desires, they stop bothering you. Since you now have a firm grip on the tranquil state of your mind, your thoughts will disappear immediately upon emergence. While desires cannot really be classified, to aid ease and understanding, I am categorizing them for you. Here:\
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\f4 \cf9 Physical desires\
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\f1 \cf2 All forms of sense gratification are pure physical desires. You envisage a pleasant outcome from the fulfillment of these ones. Such anticipated pleasure prompts you to hold onto the thought of satisfying your desire. As a result, your actions, emotions and intelligence work together to attain that fulfillment. These desires can be insatiably active or eternally latent in you, sometimes both. Whatever you enjoy through the body is basically sense gratification. Most people expend their whole life satisfying these ones. They experience everything through the body, live for the body and die for it. They remain faithful, obedient and unquestioning servants of the body. Their life revolves around body\'92s needs for food, clothing, copulation, comfort, care and so forth. Fulfillment of physical desires is fundamentally linked to body\'92s well being. Human body, however, continues to deteriorate and many work incessantly hard to maintain it. A vain exercise, that.\
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\f4 \cf9 Emotional desires\
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\f1 \cf2 Need for love, reciprocation, recognition, sharing fall under this category. These are the result of an ignorant mind and have emerged from conditioning of your mind based on your present lifetime and possibly karmic residue from previous ones. These desires impel you to look outside for fulfillment. You need \'93somebody\'94 for companionship, sharing etc. Since you are now searching outside for inner fulfillment, you have set out on a quest comparable to ranging the universe from one end to the other. Till your last breath, you continue to play a puppet to these ones. Physical ones may subside when body grows weak and old, but emotional desires remain alive and kicking. These desires arise when you forget your true nature and when you are dependant (see My Truth for more on this term). The term \'93emotional needs\'94 is a misnomer. Emotions are a product of the conditioned mind and as such mind has no needs. The sight of a slaughter house may trigger a negative emotion in you, whereas it may be positive for the business owner and neutral for the machine operator. It all depends on how you are conditioned. Upon discovery of your true nature and in maintaining that state, emotional desires will simply disappear.\
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\f4 \cf9 Intellectual desires\
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\f1 \cf2 A conditioned mind, outwardly focused, when temporarily satisfied from the fulfillment of physical and emotional desires, gives birth to intellectual ones. These prompt the individual to create something new or engage in seemingly selfless social causes. Fulfillment from these desires lasts longer than the first two ones. When all else is going well, and when you feel that sense gratification and emotional fulfillment are not enough, these ones take birth. By their very nature, a certain degree of insight is gained. However, an egotist, unsettled and ignorant mind will continue to bind you. You may devote considerable time and energy on these ones, the first two will still not leave you. Predominantly because you have simply engaged your mind elsewhere rather than settling it. Often, pursuit of these desires creates something valuable for the society though. Creating a charitable organization, working towards a material or spiritual discovery, devoting to a social or a religious cause are examples of intellectual desires. Better than the first two, these help you turn inward. The greatest thinkers, inventors and scientists were the product of intellectual desires.\
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\f4 \cf9 Transcendental desire\
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\f1 \cf2 Unlike the other three, this one is always in singular. When the only burning desire to discover your true nature remains, half the work is done. Chances are you have this desire because you have realized the futility of gratifying infinitely insatiable desires of the first three types. Fulfillment of the transcendental desire will free you from the fetters of ignorance, removing all shackles of conditioning. Desire of this nature is the ultimate quest of discovering your own truth. Without saying much, you could be Krishna, Christ, Buddha, Mahavir or any of the greatest preachers, prophets or thinkers the world has ever seen.\
Your false ego holds the fort of physical desires and in turn is boosted by the fulfillment of such desires. Your emotional desires fuel your ego and intellectual ones satisfy it. Ego, a profound subject matter, is a topic for another time. I shall cover it in the near future. For now, know that your false ego is merely an accumulation of your karmic imprints due to\'a0experiencing the world, since eons, as an external and real phenomena. If you peel off the layers of an onion, you are left with nothing in the end. Similarly, when you purify yourself no trace of ego will remain in you for it is the impurity and ignorance that make up this intangible yet concrete element ego.\
Non-fulfillment of physical, emotional, and intellectual desires shatters, hurts, and alters your ego respectively. Paradoxically, non-fulfillment of transcendental desire will arouse dispassion in you impelling you to work harder toward discovering your true nature. And upon that discovery, your ego will dissolve completely. The first two types of desires make you seek the joy outside. That permanent bliss is never to be found outside. So, despite your sincere and strenuous attempt to continuously experience joy from them, you continue, albeit unknowingly, to feed such desires all the while creating more.\
When the raiment of your peace and calm is woven from the fabric of intellectualized truth and conceptualized knowledge, it will unwind itself in a jiffy, without notice, any time your latent desires erupt or when in crisis. You can only tame the beast once you understand its nature. Desires are first to be understood, then tamed, followed by their mastery later conquest before they are eliminated.\
Concentrative meditation will still your mind, and therefore desires. Contemplative meditation or pure bhakti will decimate them completely. Eventually, you will need to learn to take your mind off each time a desire arises. With practice, you will actually start to see you desires as mere thoughts with no intrinsic value. To detect emergence of thoughts requires an ever-present and alert mind \'97 quite like the security system at the airport that beeps even if you walk through it with a penny in your pocket. Riddance from physical desires requires contemplation and relinquishment. Elimination of emotional desires requires reflection and dispassion. To rid of intellectual ones, intelligence and an inward dawning of wisdom is required. Fulfillment of the transcendental desire requires a firm adoption of all aforesaid methods as well as complete surrender if you are a bhakta or an unflinching practice of meditation if you are a yogin.\
One need not be alarmed when desires come knocking, it is only natural. They key is to win the battle without fighting, to reach at a compromise without making one. When you discover your true nature, you will no longer have any illusions about your needs or desires.\
Desires are attractive fruits on the mind tree. How many can you clip or pluck after all; you need to get to the root. And the root of the desire tree is aptly called mind. Expectations are the illegitimate children \'97 with desires as their step-siblings \'97 of an ignorant mind and conditioned self. Once married to a desire, be ready to pay child support for a very long time to come. With many ongoing affairs with other desires and de-facto \'93expectations\'94 at that, you do the math. It pays to be loyal the wise say.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Life is like the four seasons \
Life is like the cyclic four seasons. Irrespective of anyone\'92s preference, each season emerges when due giving way to the next like thoughts in the human mind where cessation of one is immediately succeeded by the emergence of another. During cold, nature shrinks; in autumn, it sheds; in summer it expands and in spring she blossoms. Seasons we dislike seem to last longer.\'a0Flowers bloom in spring and it rains in monsoons.\'a0Temperature drops in winters and mercury rises in summer like consciousness that is affected by the state of prana in your breath. It is all pretty set, almost like a put-up-or-shut-up system.\
Similarly, we all experience life\'92s various colors. Depending on what time of the year you are born, you may experience spring before autumn or vice-versa. And depending on where you are born, you may enjoy pleasant sunshine for most part of the year than bitter cold all year round. You learn to cope up with weather conditions. You layer yourself in winter and the opposite in summer. You get yourself an umbrella during the rainy season. In some regards, it is like always running away from what is at hand. We are always trying to save ourselves. Being one with nature means to experience and enjoy absolutely everything it has to offer. While you should save for the rainy days, you are not exactly a squirrel \'96 are you? Go, wet yourself in the rain sometimes \'97 it may well be grace that\'92s trickling down. Experience the cold \'97 it will only make you stronger.\
When the sun of adversities is shining hot on you turning the warmth of life into scorching heat you find unbearable, you may consider moving to a cold place. When life looks listless like the naked trees of departing autumn, you just need to be a little patient. spend your waiting period looking at pictures of the spring or move to that part of the world where fall it is not. Change is constant; it comes in small, immeasurable units just like even the heaviest downpour is materialized by tiny drops of water. That may not be the desired change however. To seek the change you want, you have to make decisions accordingly. In fact, you have to become the change yourself. A radical decision means a leaping change and a more conservative one brings about safer change.\
Or, the other option is to simply turn inward and know that experience of all external phenomena is merely a short-lived experience of the body. The eternal bliss, percolating drip by drip, within you, is now looking like an ocean. You are safe, happy and blissful inside \'97 completely protected from all heat and cold. While you can see the beautiful colors of fall, it is always spring inside with countless varieties of beautiful flowers dancing to their perfect glory on the mellifluous notes of the gale of bliss (anahata nada); just the right temperature. No muggy weather inside; no bitter cold \'97 only indescribable beauty.\
Go on, have a vacation! Take a trip to the quiet seaside of bliss within you. I can help you with the one way directions. For, I am confident, you will not feel the need or the urge to return once there.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Nature Vs You\
Why Me? It is a question that knocks many during the course of their life, some simply get knocked out by it while others, only knocked down. All of you must have seen, on many occasions, horrible things happening to good people and terrible people leading a life of richness. It is not uncommon to see those who took utmost care of their health, suffer from dreadful diseases. Many a time those who abused their body in every possible way go well into their nineties enjoying good health. Some, who always had been faithful to their partners are deserted by them for no apparent reason. This person who played by the rules ends up single, lonely and devastated \'97 both emotionally and physically, often financially too.\
So, how does this all fit in?A right answer is an offspring of a correct question. Instead of brooding over matters negatively asking \'93why me\'94, you should examine the life of your role model and ask \'91why not me?\'92 or \'91how can it be me?\'92If you want to greatly enhance your capabilities, you need to start deriving power from Mother Nature. Nature, that is full of divine energy, has something extraordinary to offer \'97 both towards fulfilling your material and spiritual ambitions. However, before you can have nature work for you, you need to develop a personal ecosystem \'97 a conscious replica of Nature.\
If you observe nature closely, you will find that there is no struggle in its play. It accepts what helps it to move and simply rejects all that misfits in its ecosystem. You offer a seed at the right time, it sprouts, other times, it perishes. You offer it artificial material like polythene and it is neither accepted nor destroyed; Nature simply rejects it. Before you can develop a personal ecosystem, you need to spend time analyzing yourself. Know what is hot from what is not for you. Understand what triggers disagreeable reactions in you and what prompts right actions from you. You need to know what makes you tick from what turns you sick. Since you are the one who is affected, this intellectual exercise focuses entirely on you. Do not go down the binge road or attempt to change anything in others. You are the subject, object, cause and outcome we are concerned with. Once you start to know yourself, even if only intellectually at this stage, you are ready to synthesize.\
Like nature, accept and therefore let sprout all that leads to bliss and reject all that misfits. Like the seed that perishes rather than sprout when sowed in the wrong season, learn to absorb all that is right but is offered to you at the wrong time. Nature does not leave any trace of the perished seed, it is called absorbing, forgiving and forgetting. You must remember not to complain like Nature. Much like Her, whenever anything is offered to you, you should either accept, absorb, or reject. They are the only three choices. It is impossible for anyone to grieve you unless you let that happen to yourself.\
Unfortunately, the same goes for all the positive emotions too \'97 no one can give you joy unless you allow yourself to be happy. Nature is always open to all, but it simply pursues its own course. Remember however, this is only an intellectual exercise; it will not take you right to the destination. It will set you on the right path of discovering a state of peace and bliss though. Once you discover your own truth, all this will be like kindergarten education to a doctorate.\
As part of this intellectual exercise, playing in the act of nature, you can choose from one of the four roles. The more you stick to the same role, the greater the proficiency in acting such role out. Sometimes a switch is a necessity, other times, merely a convenience. After all, you may be the CEO, you still report to the Board. Or you may be the Director, you don\'92t escape being appraised by your better half. I am elucidating the four roles for you. Ascertain which one you are playing presently and then work from there. As follows:\
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\f4 \cf9 The Penitent\
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\f1 \cf2 There is no dearth of people who take on the role of The Penitent. In a state of remorse, they choose to beg from nature. Begging only yields pennies and one must look downright pitiable to collect even that. The Penitent treads the ruinous path of self-pity, constantly whinging and has decided to cling onto his deluded belief about himself especially in regards to his inability to live a meaningful life. The hallmark of The Penitent is that he is always begging and is never happy. He has chosen to no longer try, assuming he ever did at the first place that is. No one can help these beyond a certain point. Only when they choose to make a switch to another role are they ready to elevate themselves.\
The Penitent is always wondering \'93Why Me\'94 and believes that the successful are so either on account of deceit or a stint of luck. A noteworthy point: no one wants to play this role. The one who does, often has harbored great negativity and remorse; So much so that they refuse to be helped. In some rare cases, due to\'a0
\i prarabdha
\i0 , one is forced to take on this role. God or Nature \'97 two words you can safely interchange \'97 does not come to the rescue of the Penitent, save some\'a0
\i pauranic
\i0 \'a0legends. If you are drowning in the water and do not know how to swim, you can beg till the cows come home, no God is going to emerge anytime soon. You can have nature help you provided you know how to summon her in the hour of need.\
The lives of the greatest yogis,\'a0
\i tapasvis
\i0 ,\'a0
\i bhaktas\'a0
\i0 and divine souls are full of examples where they would tap into the power of nature to help others, rather than begging from her. Praying is not to be confused with begging. A prayer when unaccompanied with the right effort and\'a0
\i bhava
\i0 \'a0does indeed sound like pleading. Praying can yield desired results provided some conditions are met. I will cover this another time; it is a sublime and beautiful subject, the one I will take delight in expounding. Getting back to the current topic, no matter what, try to refrain from playing The Penitent. There is no glory, only gluttony, in this role. Instead, choose the one from the following three:\
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\f4 \cf9 The Peasant\
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\f1 \cf2 The majority out there play this role. They accept whatever is handed down to them; whether that is religion, philosophy, rules, teachings, methods, relationships; everything. The Peasant will accept it, mostly unquestioningly. They do not even dare to seek their own truth or make amends. They have found their comfort zone in their false sense of security. He is not concerned with the illusory nature of the world or its reality. From his point of view, he could not care less. He has a roof, even if rented, he gets his meals as well as his share of venery. Day in, day out \'97 he will show up at work till his last day of retirement; he will go home and have his dinner; he will copulate as permitted by his body and will blindly follow a certain religion. Ironically, there is not much wrong in playing the Peasant. How does it matter to the frog of the well that there is an ocean outside! The Peasant makes a great supporter. Nature often takes care of the Peasant because he is playing by the rules and doing his share of work. As a result, he will receive his entitlements so long as he continues to effectively perform his role. This role has no charm or excitement. The Peasant is not living but simply getting by. The day he is able to taste the richness of life or its right but seemingly unfair brutality, the Peasant wakes up from his slumber. He refuses to play this role any longer. Almost everyone plays this role at least once in their life. some get tethered to the post of comfort while many choose to range and move about freely. Of those who break new ground, they generally play one of the following roles:\
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\f4 \cf9 The Peer\
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\f1 \cf2 At some point in time, often due to an inner awakening, the Peasant asks himself the most important question of his life \'97 is there a better way to lead my life? When pursued, this question is sufficient to set the ball rolling. The Peer, unlike the Peasant, starts to build on his new found individuality. He starts to create his own ecosystem no longer accepting everything on face value alone. He learns to question, a skill he develops and nurtures over time. His life has more action and excitement than the Peasant. But the Peer is a transient role. With great tenacity, he will either move to the top level or fall back to being a servant. On the positive side, even if he does go back to being the Peasant, he will never be the same again. He is going to be an outstanding one. The Peer understands that the nature must support him in his endeavours \'97 after all it is survival for the fittest. He is not happy just being a bee anymore, he wants to be the queen bee. The Peer starts to experience greater joy. He finds obstacles clearing themselves from his way, especially so if he persists with intelligence \'97 adapting, adopting, abandoning, absorbing whatever, however, whenever and wherever needed. The crown of The Potentate awaits such seeker.\
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\f4 \cf9 The Potentate\
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\f1 \cf2 The Potentate has discovered his own truth. He fully understands that mere great physical effort does not equate to extraordinary results. In the accomplishment of any goal, several factors and forces play their part \'97 a lot of which remains veiled, invisible, incomprehensible and inexplicable. The Potentate has struck a chord, actually almost a deal, with Nature. Nature passes on its divinity to the Potentate choosing him to serve humanity and help numerous people along the way. More than just an instrument of God, this one becomes a working replica of Nature. He gets almost all his work done with the mere power of a thought originated from his pure mind and released into the cosmos through his divine aura. His very voice and every word uttered becomes the supreme sanctum sound piercing through the hearts of those who come in contact with him. He has found his true nature, super-knowledge sprouts, as if automatically. He becomes the\'a0sovereign\'a0of an exalted and seraphic kingdom \'97 the hearts of people.\
So, what does it take to become the Potentate! Here is the answer; brevity being not my forte, I shall make it short nevertheless:\
1.\'a0
\i Naitikta
\i0 : Inculcate morality in your speech, actions and thoughts.\
2.\'a0
\i Vairagya
\i0 : Be indifferent to the pleasures of the material world.\
3.\'a0
\i Marga
\i0 : Choose your path \'97\'a0
\i bhakti\'a0
\i0 or
\i \'a0dhayana\'a0
\i0 to begin with.\
4.\'a0
\i Shradha
\i0 : Commit yourself fully to your chose path.\
5.\'a0
\i Pramana
\i0 : Form your view based on direct unsullied experience and not intellectual fabrication.\
6.\'a0
\i Tapas
\i0 :\'a0Persist with patience and intelligence till you get to the end.\
7.\'a0
\i Samadhi
\i0 :\'a0Allow the truth, your own truth, to dawn on you.\
8.\'a0
\i Anubhava
\i0 : Continue still till you are able to replicate your experience.\
9.\'a0
\i Turiya
\i0 : Learn to absorb and live with the extraordinary bliss that gushes forth and stays with you.\
10.\'a0
\i Samarpana
\i0 : Dedicate your life to helping others, so you may help other seekers.\
The joy of giving far exceeds any other.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami.\
\
Life is like a Movie\
Life is like a movie. Whether it is good or bad, long or short is more a question of individual preference than industry positioning. Some movies unanimously fall in the category of tragedy while many others get classified as comedy. Some go like a slow drama, some, melodrama while many are too action packed to be a drama. And, of course, some are labeled as horror and some simply are horrible. Some are thrilling while many others, grilling. Once in the cinema hall, you seem to have a little choice.\
Regardless of how bogus the movie, you rarely choose to quit. You feel you may as well sit through since you have paid for it. some people choose to commit movicide \'97 they leave in between consciously. Sometimes, the movie is just too good. Oh! but the rowdy ones behind must comment on every scene all the while kicking your seat with each movement of their wobbly legs. Not to mention the guy next to you, the one who is on a mission to exhaust nation\'92s corn chips supply, keeps munching with loud crackling sound as at apocalypse.\
To top it all, you may have well-behaved creatures in the row in front who are slurping their cola like the hiss of an anaconda. They have decided to release all the locked up cola in the mini glaciers in the glass by shaking it vigorously, almost like micro-global-warming. You feel helpless, perhaps frustrated. Your attempts to ignore it all and focus on the movie offer you little consolation. Similarly, such is life.\
There are some factors in your control while many others seem completely out of bounds. You learn to live with some as matter-of-fact and some others you struggle with. But let me share a secret: you can change the movie whenever you want, absolutely at will. Change in the movie will automatically bring about change in the audience that surrounds you. You would not really take your kids to a horror movie classified beyond their present age, for example. The noisy guys are unlikely to be found in a romantic movie and so forth.The movie of life, while projected on a screen you can see externally, is undoubtedly your own choice.\
Your mind is the powerful projector playing the reel of your thoughts. And this projector is powered by the vital life force (prana) in your breath. If your mind is under control, you can change the reel to your liking. And if your breath is under control you can simply pause or turn off the projector at will. I have not only shared an important secret with you, I have also exposed, in clear terms, albeit briefly, the most important yogic secret.Go on enjoy! Have a nice time at the movies. How about pitting the Pitt and colonizing the Clooney for a change! Play your own movie, the one you like, the one that delights you, uplifts you and boosts your spirits. Play it at your own terms, in your preferred setting; watch it in your private hall, arranged and serviced as per you preference. That is how I watch it!\
Care to join me, anyone?\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The first Step in Meditation\
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\f4 \cf9 Prerequisites\
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\f1 \cf2 A burning desire to experience your true nature and an unwavering commitment to your chosen path are the prerequisites. Please reread\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2011/10/the-be-natural-system.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 Nature and You}}, especially the last section listing the ten points.\
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\f4 \cf9 Starting Point\
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\f1 \cf2 Commit to the practice of meditating daily, even twice a day if you are on the path of meditation. If you want a vision of your deity, you need to develop a bond first. Start crying for you deity while chanting the holy names. Sounds unreasonable, if not outright silly? Try it to see the results. Offer whatever you are doing to your\'a0
\f5\i Ishta
\f1\i0 . Eat, breathe, live, sleep for your personal god. It is the slow and steady path but the one that can purify you quickly.\
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\f4 \cf9 Commitment\
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\f1 \cf2 It is a question of priority. Can you give me an hour of your time daily? If not, can you start thinking about what I tell you when you are driving, or bathing, for example? If not, can you give up watching TV or reading newspaper and devote that time to the path? If not, can you set aside a certain number of days in a year exclusively dedicated to the practice, almost like a meditation retreat? I am happy to offer you direct supervision and guidance. If not, can you start practicing compassion and non-violence under all circumstances, and, truth under all possible circumstances? If not, for every emotion or sentiment offered to you, can you return love? Imagine where you will end up if you adopted all of the above.\
If you carry out an initially intense effort, the flux of purified energy will automatically bring about the required changes. If you tread the path slowly, steadily and correctly, the urge to increase intensity will emerge automatically. So, either way you can get to the destination. At some point, a dedicated effort will be required if you want to get to that state of permanent bliss. Do not ponder over matters of future in regards to taking time out; it is lot more important to get started. Choose one, many or all of the aforesaid points. From my point of view, I would like to offer the complete system \'97 the system of self transformation. A piecemeal introduction will be of little use. And to document the whole system, I require some time.\
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\f4 \cf9 Riddance from impurities\
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\f1 \cf2 Imagine a glass full of salty water. Your goal is to get rid of the salt. There are many such methods as distillation etc to choose from, all of which lead to the same outcome. However, all of them require certain apparatus and paraphernalia. The easiest way is to start pouring fresh water in the glass. Soon, it will start to overflow. If you continue pouring the fresh water, eventually not a trace of impurity will remain and the glass will be full of pure water. Such is the state of your mind. If you cannot afford the system of\'a0
\f5\i dhyana
\i0 (
\f1 comparable to processes requiring apparatus), you can start pouring in devotional sentiments or moral thoughts. All impurities will flow out of your system leaving you pristine and unblemished.\
We cannot change the past, so give yourself a clean state with resolve and do not be too hard on yourself. Regardless of what all has been done in the past, if you want to go through self purification leading to self transformation, you can do it. I doubt there has ever been a saint who never sinned. And even if there were, it still does not change the life of those sinners who became sages. The primary difference between a sage and a sinner is the former\'92s ability to exercise morality and return all emotions with love and love alone. The sinner reacts but the saint only ever acts, unconditionally if you will. Nobody can stop you from acting with compassion other than you alone.\
If you do not change what you do, how can Nature change what you get! After all, we only ever reap, in multifold, what we sow!\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The two Spiritual Approaches\
Living in the woods is an experience divine in itself, saving disagreements with insects, mosquitoes and rats. The wild ones start to behave like chartered socialites but insects and mice seem to have traded their conscience for securing a place in the woods. They are all there to train you though. Once you learn to put up with them, putting up with \'93humans\'94 is a child\'92s play thereafter. During my main meditation of seven months, I lived in a run-down hut. It was old and pseudo-abandoned, like many gadgets in your possession. It had more cobwebs, some gossamer and other, more prominent, than the blades of grass that made the\'a0thatched roof.\
The only thing that outnumbered the webs were holes in the walls. For, the walls were made from wooden planks haphazardly placed next to each other. A job seemed to be done by either the unwilling or the underpaid worker, if not both. The webs reminded me of the traps of thoughts intelligently crafted by the mind, and, holes, that of glaring loopholes in human assumptions about the universal existence.\
Bees, hornets droned in hundreds around that place, predominantly because on the ground had blossomed thousands of mini-flowers of blue, white and yellow hues. The yellow ones were of particular interest to the baboons as if they, the primitive restless apes with no civic sense, had sophisticated taste buds. You could see how beggars too can be choosers when presented with the opportunity. While believing a certain theory of science, apes would be my ancestral cousins, I still did not feel much respect for them. For, they were rowdy like the passionate mind and restless like the indecisive one who fails to stay on anything like the baboons who would keep hopping from one branch to another. They were very cute though and occasionally I found myself appreciating the fine down on their bodies that protected them from subzero cold and chill. The monkeys still did not win over the monk though. Unlike the brown city dwellers, and I am only referring to apes, these ones had silver gray fur with black faces and limbs dark as coal.\
Moving on from apes to bees, I had the opportunity, on multiple occasions, to closely observe bees, ants and spiders. From those moments emerged an interesting analogy, I would like to share with you: As follows:I found that bees and ants were always working, bees being more restless. Unlike any cow, goat or buck, I never found one relaxing. Even on the hive, they were constantly buzzing. A feature common among both ants and bees is that they work for someone else \'97 for their respective queens, and that they both live in colonized settings.\
Another important point, equally noteworthy, is\'a0that\'a0they are busy hoarding. Possibly because they work for someone else, their\'a0sovereign ensures that they are always working servilely for a pittance, if that. The bees have accepted it as a fact-of-life. After all, if thousands others are working like peasants, this must be the right, decent, social, rewarding and only way of working \'97 strikingly resonant with the common human psyche. The bees, it appears, \'a0choose never to stop and think; they have simply bought into the group intelligence \'97 if all others are following this approach, it must have some merit. The queen bee, as I understand, is of slightly larger size than the \'93worker\'94 bees. But that is not the only differentiation, it is the unique scent of the queen bee that makes it the queen bestowing the royal status.\
Before I offer you my \'93interesting analogy\'94, I would like to draw your attention to the ways of the spider. A spider is a unique and an independent operator. A spider does not buzz or budge for food. It selects a place, almost as an act of apparent intelligence, and quietly begins its work. It is not worried about the future. It weaves its web and waits patiently, often not staying in or on but outside the web. I never saw any spider showing any signs of restlessness. It lives for the present moment and resides neither in colonies nor in abject slavery. It does live on faith, but not blind faith. I observed, if for days no prey finds its death in the web, the spider starts to weave a new one.\
Like the very competent person, the spider gets the job done without overworking. Some creature comes flying right into the web; the spider starts to move immediately. It is swift and alert like a mouse this time. It strangles its prey to death and feeds on it till satisfied. As time continues ticking, with each new dawn, the providence keeps delivering fresh food right at the \'93webstep\'94. The spider, like the ultimate devotee, has learned to do the right karma and live with complete surrender. It lives on the faith that food will come, for it seems to know that all karma must bear fruit eventually.\
So! you can choose to be the spider or the bee. The choice is yours. While their ways of working could yield results accordingly in the material world too, my focus here is spiritual attainment.\
The queen bee is your mind. If you continue to work for your mind, you choose to do so at your own peril and that too for a dribble. It will keep you busy in the unnecessary slog and you will continue to drone loudly as well as hop restlessly till your last breath. Being the bee, you may enjoy the fragrance of the flower from whose pollen you are extracting the juice but you will not be allowed to partake of the honey. The honey in the hive is much too much for even the queen (read mind). Someone else will simply walk away with the whole apiary one day. Do not work for your queen. Starting a revolt may simply be a gut reaction but sustaining such rebel needs great effort and intelligence while seeing it succeed requires all of the above plus extraordinary persistence, tenacity and discipline.\
If you are going to revolt against the restless and listless life of a bee, you better be ready to assiduously work till the end; your task is mammoth \'97 finding peace in a noisy world, and your goal, only as monumental as audacious \'97 turning the queen bee into your obedient slave. It is achievable though. The stillness of your mind will make you larger than life and unflinching morality will give you the scent that will madden not only the queen bee but all other creatures that will ever cross their glance with you. A snake may be million times more deadly than the lion, but it is latter\'92s grace and manner that has him crowned the king; for, among other things, under normal circumstances, a lion does not kill unless it is for lunch.\
If revolting is not your cup of tea, you may choose to be docile like the spider. It still requires a significant mind shift. While continuing to be the bee enslaving the queen is a matter of revolt and resolve, going from bee to spider is more like a renaissance. From living in dense colonies, you now must learn to live peacefully in solitude. Ever doing the right karma, you learn to surrender with utmost faith. You let go off hopping around and learn to be still and situated in the\'a0
\i bhava
\i0 \'a0of your lord. You do what you have to do leaving the futility or fruition of your efforts to your deity. You are no longer interested in the honey or temporary pleasure from the fragrance of a flower. Like the spider knits its web with the sole purpose of preying, you \'a0do all your work with the only intent of seeing your I
\i shta
\i0 .\
All the time, the spider is firmly established in the\'a0
\i bhava
\i0 \'a0of plundering \'97 it stays on the wall but moves without a moment\'92s hesitation at the first sighting of any foreign creature in its web; you too, like a true devotee, must stay in the\'a0
\i bhakti bhava
\i0 \'a0stealing every opportunity of rendering devotional service. Great mindfulness is required to see no opportunity leaves you unmet. With the surrender matching that of a spider, the providence will take care of you without fail. In other words, you will be a worthy recipient of divine grace. The spider weaves the web but never gets caught in it, like the self-realized person who lives in the world but never gets entangled in its fabric. Like the spider, he understands that the web is designed for provisions and that unless he is careful, he will, with time being the only separator, one day, become the provision himself. He lives in the world like tongue in the denture, enjoying the taste but not getting bit or chewed.\
Like hive is the work of bees, and web, spider \'97 your life is your creation. You have worked hard collecting nectar from the flowers building your own hive and many times, you have swallowed your own spittle in knitting your world. Unlike the spider weaving its web round and round, I can only hope that you stopped, however rarely, to critically examine, analyse and value your work. Whether you are the spider or the prey, if you get entangled in the web, you will only be greeted by struggle and agony.\
Go on enjoy! Learn to sip the juice from flowers with detachment till such time that you learn to imbibe the nectar within you. In your relentless pursuit of weaving your own web, be sure you do not design it so complex that it turns into a trap. You deserve better.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Depression the Yogic view\
Today I found out about someone who is suffering from depression. I sincerely wished I could see them in person and help them come out of it. Since that may not be possible considering my physical location, I am choosing this blog to convey my message.I have known many people who have suffered from depression; some were affected so severely that they quit their jobs and virtually locked themselves in their homes, almost like solitary confinement. With some I spent tens of hours spanning over months to assist them in coming out of it.\
When one is affected by depression, the kith and kin experience it too. But all the others in the family have to cope because if they start to express their depressed state, the patient suffers even more. In this post, I am going to focus on the definition of depression, its cause and cure. It is a challenge to cover the topic in detail in a blog post, I must try nevertheless. Embrace yourself for a long post.\
Before I offer you my point of view, I would like to draw your attention to certain important details. As follows:\
Please remember that I am not a medical but a meditation specialist. My viewpoint here is based on my years of yogic practices (
\i kriy\uc0\u257 
\i0 ), meditation and many months of very intense practice. The sole purpose of such meditation was to experience the true nature of mind, its natural state that resultantly unravels the mysteries of mind; not brain, not body, just mind.\
The information in this post is primarily and directly based on the knowledge that gushes forth when I am in a state of meditational equipoise. To better illustrate my point, I have drawn on information from\'a0
\i vedic
\i0 \'a0texts, hence my use of Sanskrit terms, as well as from my experiences in dealing with those who went through depression during the course of their own lives. If you can see the world through my eyes, the scenery will change instantly. And to have my vision, you just have to do what I do; everything else will follow in tow. Please read this post several times to understand the message.\
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\f4 \cf2 What is Depression?\
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\f1 \cf2 Depression is a state of mind. It is not a physical ailment; it is not a neurological disorder and it is rarely\'a0a malfunctioning of the brain. It is strictly a condition of the mind. And mind pervades your whole body and beyond. It is for this reason that pacification of the mind calms the whole body just like its restlessness upsets the whole system. Severity of depression can be ascertained from the symptoms of the patient. While I am using the term patient, that truly is an oxymoron. There really cannot be a \'93patient\'94 for depression because it is not a \'93disease\'94 that one can suffer from. It is simply a mismatch of the colliding psychic imprints (
\i v\uc0\u257 san\u257 
\i0 ) also known tendencies of the mind. Mind cannot malfunction for the true nature of mind is pure bliss (
\i \uc0\u257 nanda
\i0 ) and beyond all subjective characterizations and dualities (
\i dvanda
\i0 ). Good-bad, right-wrong, true-false and so forth are examples of such designations and dualities.\
In order to correctly adjudge the severity of depression, please go through the following section carefully and patiently. I will try to simplify but we are dealing with a complex subject. So, reread as many times as required to fully absorb the meaning.\
You have three bodies, namely, gross body (
\i sth\uc0\u363 la \u347 ar\u299 ra
\i0 ), subtle body (
\i s\uc0\u363 k\u7779 ma \u347 ar\u299 ra
\i0 ) and causal body (
\i k\uc0\u257 ra\u7751 a \u347 ar\u299 ra
\i0 ). Your gross body is your physical body made from flesh and bones etc. Your subtle body is made from your consciousness and an amalgamation of your emotions. And the causal body is made from your soul (read Self or Mind). On the causal body rests both the gross and subtle body. These three bodies operate in conjunction with five sheaths (
\i ko\uc0\u7779 a
\i0 ), namely, gross (
\i annamaya ko\uc0\u7779 a
\i0 ), mind (
\i manomaya ko\uc0\u7779 a
\i0 ), life force (
\i pr\uc0\u257 \u7751 amaya ko\u7779 a
\i0 ), wisdom (
\i vij\'f1\uc0\u257 namaya kosha
\i0 ) and bliss (
\i \uc0\u257 nandamaya ko\u7779 a
\i0 ). These collectively affect the five fundamental energies (
\i v\uc0\u257 yu
\i0 ) in your body, namely, vital life energy (
\i pr\uc0\u257 \u7751 a vayu
\i0 ), descending energy (
\i ap\uc0\u257 na v\u257 yu
\i0 ), ascending energy (
\i ud\uc0\u257 na v\u257 yu
\i0 ), thermal energy (
\i sam\uc0\u257 na v\u257 yu
\i0 ), and diffusive energy (
\i vy\uc0\u257 na v\u257 yu
\i0 ).\
Manipulation of the energies can affect the state of the sheaths as well as the three bodies, and vice-versa. Everything, absolutely everything that happens in your body is directly linked to the aforesaid. I will not elucidate the energies and sheaths in this post, lest this becomes a book. I will, however, briefly explain the three bodies and their link to all bodily and mental conditions that require medication for their cure.\
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\f4 \cf2 Gross body (Physical body)\
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\f1 \cf2 According to\'a0
\i Ayurveda
\i0 \'a0and many other yogic texts, your physical body is made from seven key elements. They are saliva (
\i rasa
\i0 ), blood (
\i rakta
\i0 ), flesh (
\i m\uc0\u257 \u7745 sa
\i0 ), fat (
\i meda
\i0 ), bones (
\i asthi
\i0 ), marrow (
\i majj\uc0\u257 
\i0 ) and the creative fluid (
\i \uc0\u347 ukra
\i0 ). The composition of three humors: wind (
\i v\uc0\u257 ta
\i0 ), bile (
\i pitta
\i0 ) and phlegm (
\i kapha
\i0 ) determine how your body treats intake of any food from the air you breathe to the fatty desserts you may enjoy. The five energies affect such factors as digestion and metabolism. That is purely from the perspective of the gross body. Once the gross body has processed the food, the subtle body (read Consciousness), depending on its own state determines how such food affects your physical body. It is for this reason some eat very little but accumulate a lot of fat and some eat lot more but do not put on any weight.\
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\f4 \cf2 Subtle body (Consciousness)\
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\f1 \cf2 In simple terms, subtle body is another name for your state of consciousness. At any point in time, your consciousness can be in one of the five states namely, conscious (
\i caitanya
\i0 ), subconscious (
\i upacaitanya
\i0 ), unconscious (
\i an\uc0\u257 caitanya
\i0 ), non conscious (
\i acaitanya
\i0 ) and superconscious (
\i par\uc0\u257 caitanya
\i0 ). Further more, you could be in dreaming\'a0(
\i svapana
\i0 ), waking\'a0(
\i j\uc0\u257 grat
\i0 ), sleeping\'a0(
\i su\uc0\u7779 upta
\i0 )\'a0or transcendental\'a0(
\i tur\uc0\u299 ya
\i0 )\'a0state. Once again, to preserve brevity, I will elaborate on these terms another time. For now, I just want you to be aware of the terms to gain a holistic view. This is where all your emotions live, in the subtle body that is. All involuntary functions of the body, including heart beat, pulse, blood pressure and the like are impacted by the subtle body. Control of the subtle body can give you direct control over all the involuntary functions of the body. I say this from first-hand experience I can demonstrate under laboratory conditions.\
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\f4 \cf2 Causal body (Soul)\
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\f1 \cf2 Your causal body is directly responsible for your consciousness and bodily existence. Many yogic texts state that upon death the soul travels from one body to another just like we discard sullied clothes for fresh ones. But that is not all; the soul does not travel alone. Along with it go the tendencies of the mind (
\i citta v\uc0\u7771 tti
\i0 ). Such tendencies that have been strengthened by experiencing the world as an external phenomena through the perception of sound (
\i \uc0\u347 abda
\i0 ), touch (
\i spar\uc0\u347 a
\i0 ), taste (
\i rasa
\i0 ), form (
\i r\uc0\u363 pa
\i0 ), and smell (
\i gandha
\i0 ) with the aid of ears, skin, tongue, eyes, and nose. Causal body, in a way, is your true nature. It is your unconditioned Self, natural state of your mind. But just like rusted iron is a poor conductor of electricity, conditioned Self is a poor conductor of bliss. All tendencies of the mind live in your causal body.\
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\f4 \cf2 Life Cycle of a Disease\
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\f1 \cf2 Most physical diseases are not the causes but the symptoms. They are symptoms of a conditioned consciousness that is now polluted. When subtle body is stressed, the signs of disease will emerge in the physical body. It is possible to curb certain diseases of the gross body with treatment and therapy but complete healing only occurs when the root cause is eliminated from the subtle body. Imagine a cancer patient who gets operated for a tumor in the stomach. Whatever be the nature of his tumor, if he does not change his lifestyle \'97 directly affecting his gross body, and does not change his outlook towards life \'97 directly affecting his subtle body, his tumor is likely to come back. If he can get in touch with his causal body, either by way of meditation (
\i dhy\uc0\u257 na
\i0 ) or deep devotional absorption (
\i mah\uc0\u257 bh\u257 va
\i0 ), he can flush the disease out of his system, forever that is.\
Some diseases originate in the gross body and traveling through the subtle (consciousness), affect the causal body (soul).\'a0Such diseases affect one\'92s physical, mental and spiritual health. These ones are easier and quicker to fix compared to\'a0those that are due to the diseased causal body. Those ailments that occur in the subtle body, directly from polluted\'a0consciousness, grow into resident diseases in the physical body. An emotional imbalance, therefore an ill subtle body, is\'a0the primary cause of all chronic ailments. The ones originating from the causal body take the longest to heal and often\'a0end up being terminal conditions of the physical body.\
The state of your conditioned soul has a direct impact on your consciousness which in turn affects your physical body.\'a0Those who live a stress free life tend to enjoy a longer life in a healthier body. Functions of the physical body are\'a0affected by the state of the consciousness and soul. For example, a patient administered with general anesthesia cannot\'a0move as his consciousness (subtle body) has been influenced. And someone proclaimed dead, therefore signifying absence of causal body (soul), is unable to ever get back his state of consciousness or body movements.\
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\f4 \cf2 Causes of Depression\
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\f1 \cf2 A pertinent question: what causes depression? Depression is a state of mind. It originates in the causal body. The mind has become a victim of its own latent tendencies. It can happen from curbing your desires or an unfulfilling life, both of which are caused by ignorance of the conditioned mind. A lot of people lead an unfulfilling life; some choose to ignore the voice of the soul while many others drown it in material pursuits. But, one day it catches up.\
There can be no external medication for the sick causal body. Before we can get to the cure for depression, it is important to ascertain the type of depression.\
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\f4 \cf2 Severe Depression\
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\f1 \cf2 If your body is now unwell because of the depression and you have developed hypertension, high blood pressure, loss of appetite or irregular appetite or similar problems, your depression has already traveled to the physical body. Chances are you suffer from constipation as well. To label your depression as severe, in addition to the aforesaid physical symptoms, you must also have all the signs outlaid under \'93Mild Depression\'94 and \'93Illusory Depression\'94. You are at this stage because of a stressful life, emotional turmoil and because your soul went through a long period of starvation somehow managing to survive the spiritual famine. This does not mean that your depression cannot be cured; it merely signals that you will need to work at all three levels. I shall cover this in a bit more detail under the \'93Cure\'94 section.\
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\f4 \cf2 Mild Depression\
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\f1 \cf2 If your body is fit but you simply have lost taste in most things you used to enjoy and you find yourself indecisive as well as indifferent, chances are your depression has risen to the level of the subtle body but has not yet touched your physical body. It is still at the level of the consciousness. It can be cured with discipline and effort.\
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\f4 \cf2 Illusory Depression\
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\f1 \cf2 If your signs of depression are limited to great boredom, sluggishness, stupor, insomnia, phobia, and restlessness, your depression is at the initial level. You are still in the green zone and can get back to your original mental health in a short time frame.\
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\f4 \cf2 Cure for Depression\
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\f1 \cf2 For the cure to work, you must be in agreement with my aforesaid thesis. If after reading the above, you find yourself nodding affirmatively, continue reading.\
Before you get to the actual cure, please be aware that your depression is not the result of some overnight act and therefore cannot be fixed overnight. You must not get depressed about not being able to quickly get rid of your depression. Be patient. You can surely come out of it as easily as you went into such depression at the first place. But be very patient and relaxed about it. Know that it is your mind playing tricks and if you catch it red handed, it will stop.\
Let us get to the cure:\uc0\u8232 If you are not taking anti-depressants currently, half the job is already done. Please do not start taking such pills. They are soporific substances designed to artificially pacify your brain creating the illusion of a calm mind. Gradually, their dosage needs increasing as your brain gets used to it.\
To not only completely get rid of depression but feel fitter than you have ever been, you need to cover all three aspects: body, consciousness, and the soul.\
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\f4 \cf2 Gross body (Physical)\
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\f1 \cf2 Do the following, or some of the following, to regain fitness of your gross body:\
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\ls2\ilvl0\cf2 \kerning1\expnd0\expndtw0 {\listtext	1.	}\expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0
Tire your body out a little. Go work out in the gym or play some sport.\
\ls2\ilvl0\kerning1\expnd0\expndtw0 {\listtext	2.	}\expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0
Eat vegetarian foods that are alkaline in nature. Avoid acidic foods. Increase intake of whole meals. Avoid starchy foods and spices.\
\ls2\ilvl0\kerning1\expnd0\expndtw0 {\listtext	3.	}\expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0
Eat at strictly the same time every day. Do not keep large gaps between your meals. That prompts the body to use stored energy raising insulin levels.\
\ls2\ilvl0\kerning1\expnd0\expndtw0 {\listtext	4.	}\expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0
Go to bed at exactly the same time every day. Do not get stressed about not being able to sleep. Just hit the sack as a matter of discipline.\
\ls2\ilvl0\kerning1\expnd0\expndtw0 {\listtext	5.	}\expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0
Get up at exactly the same time.\
\ls2\ilvl0\kerning1\expnd0\expndtw0 {\listtext	6.	}\expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0
Avoid watching TV. It really dulls the body and mind.\
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\f4 \cf2 Subtle Body (Consciousness)\
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\f1 \cf2 To purify the subtle body and therefore your emotional health, do the following:\
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\ls3\ilvl0\cf2 \kerning1\expnd0\expndtw0 {\listtext	1.	}\expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0
Do some selfless service or engage in an emotionally fulfilling social or spiritual cause.\
\ls3\ilvl0\kerning1\expnd0\expndtw0 {\listtext	2.	}\expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0
Do what makes you happy. If you like going outdoors, painting, cooking, reading or whatever it may be, do it. Do NOT read up on depression and other people\'92s stories.\
\ls3\ilvl0\kerning1\expnd0\expndtw0 {\listtext	3.	}\expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0
Do not talk to those who drain you out emotionally. Reduce phone calls and pointless conversations.\
\ls3\ilvl0\kerning1\expnd0\expndtw0 {\listtext	4.	}\expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0
Do not mention to anyone that you are under depression. Most people will say there is nothing to worry and that you are just stressed, and all the others cannot do a thing about it.\
\ls3\ilvl0\kerning1\expnd0\expndtw0 {\listtext	5.	}\expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0
Even the physicians, after you pay them a few visits and keep complaining of depression, they will diagnose you with it putting you on some ludicrous prescription plan. I even suggest that depression is probably a trick condition, a highly profitable one, created by the pharmaceutical companies.\
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\cf2 Depression is not a type of fear that you need to face it to decimate it. It is just a state of mind, albeit not the desirable one. Just like you think of ice cream but may not have it, you can choose to let go off depression exactly like that. It is impossible to know or feel that you have depression till you entertain the thought of actually having it.\
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\f4 \cf2 Causal Body (Soul)\
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\f1 \cf2 Give at least thirty minutes of your time every day doing the following and watch depression disappearing miraculously before long:\
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Meditate for fifteen minutes in the morning and fifteen minutes just before going to bed. Doing for longer duration will be even better. Before you can meditate you need to build concentration. In order to do that, light a candle, keep it at your eye level and at a distance of about two feet from you and watch it unblinking. It will take some effort to not blink but do it for as long as comfortable. It is a deviation from the standard concentration practice of\'a0
\i Trataka
\i0 where eyes are just not blinked.\
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Listen to some devotional songs or pleasant music to take your mind off worldly thoughts.\
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Sleep on your right side whenever possible. This activates the lunar channel\'a0(
\i ida nadi
\i0 ), left breath and brings down body temperature. There is a reason why meditational practices flourish in cold places. Discriminating faculties of the mind calm down significantly when in cold and breathing through the left nostril.\
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Try to maintain a happy disposition. Know that you are an instrument in the hands of the Divine and that He is looking after you. To the one who seeks His sanctuary (
\i \uc0\u347 ara\u7751 \u257 gati
\i0 ), he basks in His Grace unconditionally. Harbour no doubts on that front.\
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And smile! Try it. Do not let that smile leave your face.\uc0\u8232 \
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\cf2 The practice of meditation stills the five energies and pierces through the five sheaths.\
Oversimplifying, there is no more to you than the three bodies, five sheaths and five energies. If you work on the three aspects, that is \'97 body, consciousness and soul, you will see tangible results within a period of twenty eight days.\
Doing it continuously for forty days will stabilize the energies. Most yogic practices take six months to show their full effect. So, doing it for the full six months will completely get rid of your depression all the while transforming your state of consciousness and the spin of your chakras. You will be completely healed. Six months. No medication.\
Art is long and time is fleeting as Robert Frost would say. There is much I want to write and share on this. This post has become heinously long already. I hope that you can put in the effort and feel better by following the approach.\
May all sentient beings experience bliss and live a life free of diseases, poverty and hunger.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Life is like a Musical Instrument\
Life is like a musical instrument. It can sound mellifluous or cacophonous depending on the player who is playing it. Some instruments require perfect stillness of the fingers, others, great dexterity. Some you have to beat while many you have to blow. Each one\'92s music is unique with some being outstandingly distinctive. Some are only ever designed for accompaniment. Some are very famous, others popular and many, only too obscure. In the hands of an expert, the instrument seems to come alive; so much so, it becomes hard to know who to appreciate more, the instrument or the player.\
Some instruments are larger than life while many are smaller than a stapler; the same goes for players and their temperaments too. Intrinsically, an instrument is devoid of any essence for, it is always the player who makes it sound either like flowing river or falling rocks. It almost seems that any given instrument gives you very limited choice \'97 one drum with a couple of sticks or seven notes and an octave or two, after all, in how many different ways can you play it. But, we all know, that the \'93player\'92 can just play tunes with each sounding one better than the others. What a miracle!Quite similarly, life is how you play it.\
The player always comes up with more enigmatic, enchanting, unique tunes \'97 tunes that stir your soul, the ones that can make you cry or laugh, tunes that you could have never perceived, but the player continues to surprise the world. What else can explain existence of millions of soundtracks, instrumental or otherwise, across the globe. If you are able to play all the tunes that Mozart or Beethoven ever played, while that is commendable, it is not sufficient for the world to appreciate you or for the history to grant you a place in its ranks. If, however, you played only your own tunes outperforming or even outnumbering, qualitatively or quantitatively, any of the past greats, the world will respect you for your originality. Across all fields, the ones who come up with their own, original viewpoint, philosophy or theory are the ones who help the society move forward.\
Go on play! But be sure to play your tune. Make your own music. Avoid blowing your own trumpet though. Add your own voice. Take training first, if necessary, so you learn better how to play. But never take training on what to play \'97 you be the decision maker on that. Play the most beautiful music present in you adding your inner voice. Once trained, you can produce the most seductive, enchanting, melodious and rapturous music, upon hearing which your inner voice will find sound automatically in the manner most profound and sublime besides being original and unique. Do not play anyone else\'92s tunes. Select your own instrument, play your own tune, why, conduct your own orchestra in manner no less than grand, in style no less than great with unmatched grace. Well, that will certainly require turning inward!\
Please, but for the welfare of others, a public performance \'97 only after you are ready to step outside the bathroom, robed appropriately.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The silent Agreement of the Faithful\
From day one at the ashram, we have been having regular visitors. There are two locals who visit us absolutely every day. One is fair colored and the other one is dusky. They both have very different temperaments yet they come almost at the same time. The fair one likes to sit close to me whereas the dusky prefers to maintain distance. It appears they do not come for any j
\f2 \uc0\u8134 
\f1 ana or to listen to discourses. In fact, they have no questions. They are happy expressing their love. The dusky one has sharp features and she is not as emotional as the fair one. The fair one however has soft eyes and a pleasant countenance. Like the two-legged locals, the fair one seems to have not had a bath since Christmas. She likes to roll on the ground as soon as I approach her. The dusky one simply wags her tail from a distance. So much so for the human-animal bond\'85 I am putting us in the human category, albeit a little doubtfully.\
We cook food twice a day. We make it a point to cook two extra chapattis for our friends. Because of their love, they often end up getting some additional bites from me too. When I am eating, they come and sit next to me unblinking, gazing at me out of their soft eyes while clearly expressing the need for food. Their expression is convincing and their persistence, only too compelling.\
The other day, while their loving gaze was imploring me to feed them out of my share, they suddenly started barking. While I sat thunderstruck from their unexpected loud bark, they moved at lightening pace to the other edge of the ashram. I wondered; I thought perhaps another dog nearby in their territory prompted such reaction as I had witnessed a vicious dog-fight on the very first day. Such is the nature of mind, an outcome of millions of years of evolution: we rely on the knowledge from past to make sense of the present. Transcending this tendency is self-realization. Always living in the present moment and being aware of every single such moment that unfolds before us is the hallmark of a highly vigilant mind.\
Getting back to the present story, there was no sign of another dog, instead, they were barking at some visitors. From the scent of the strangers, the dogs figured they meant no harm. Consequently, they backed out. The strangers were three local women who had come to pay us a visit. The locals come to the ashram as if they are visiting a temple. They have no questions about God or the Divine. Occasionally they have queries around the well being of their cattle and kids, about rain and rainy days; but that is pretty much about it. Please allow me to make some stereotypical statements without prejudice or pun.\
Education somehow takes away the devotion. The educated wants to know before he does. He feels he must base his faith on certain intellectual ground. It must make sense to the educated. Comparatively, the villagers are quite simple. They are just happy to believe. Could that be blind faith? The faith of the educated is blinded by his self-proclaimed scholarship based on his custody of second-hand knowledge. The faith of the villager is based on nothing. It is empty of all cognitive content. In one, the believer is blind and in the other the belief is blind. If one is better than the other that is for you to decide. To the devotee, however, he needs no rationale.\'a0
\f2\i Bhakti
\f1 \'a0
\i0 is designed to cut the chords of perceptions and proclivities. For that, one must rise above intellect. Such transcendental state allows the believer and the belief to become one. The moment you become one, at that very second will manifest the form of your deity. Not just a column of light or some haloed figure of various hues, I am referring to a tangible form you can touch.\
Once again getting back to dogs, I was touched by their loyalty. Because we have been feeding them, they started watching the property. They want to protect us. That is the silent agreement of the faithful. They get food, they start watching. They get love, they give love back. They don\'92t get love, they still give you love. No matter what your mood, they wag. No matter what their mood, they still wag. When you feel playful, they want to play with you. You give them chapatti with ghee, they accept it gleefully. You offer them without ghee, they seem just as happy.\
The only discrimination they do is to differentiate between their provider and the stranger, between the friend and foe of their master. That is the silent agreement of the faithful.\
Their behavior matches, if not surpasses, the one you come to see from a self-realized soul. They are living in the present moment. Is it any wonder that dog is an anagram of god? After all, it is the same God who lives in all. No exceptions. And who lives in God? Are drops fundamental to the sea for the ocean is made up of drops? Or, is it the other way for it is in the ocean the drop finds refuge? Either way, both are complete in their own right. The invocation mantra of the\'a0
\f2\i I\uc0\u347 \u257 v\u257 sya upanishad
\f1\i0 \'a0states the following:\
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\f6 \cf2 \uc0\u2323 \u2365 \u2350 \u2381 
\f1  
\f6 \uc0\u2346 \u2370 \u2352 \u2381 \u2339 \u2350 \u2342 \u2307 
\f1  
\f6 \uc0\u2346 \u2370 \u2352 \u2381 \u2339 \u2350 \u2367 \u2342 \u2306 
\f1  
\f6 \uc0\u2346 \u2370 \u2352 \u2381 \u2339 \u2366 \u2340 \u2381 \u2346 \u2369 \u2352 \u2381 \u2339 \u2350 \u2369 \u2342 \u2330 \u2381 \u2351 \u2340 \u2375 
\f1  |\uc0\u8232 
\f6 \uc0\u2346 \u2370 \u2352 \u2381 \u2339 \u2360 \u2381 \u2351 
\f1  
\f6 \uc0\u2346 \u2370 \u2352 \u2381 \u2339 \u2350 \u2366 \u2342 \u2366 \u2351 
\f1  
\f6 \uc0\u2346 \u2370 \u2352 \u2381 \u2339 \u2350 \u2375 \u2357 \u2366 \u2357 \u2358 \u2367 \u2359 \u2381 \u2351 \u2340 \u2375 
\f1  ||\
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\f2\i \cf2 om p\uc0\u363 r\u7751 amada\u7717  p\u363 r\u7751 amida\u7745  p\u363 r\u7751 \u257 tpur\u7751 amudacyate |
\f1\i0 \uc0\u8232 
\f2\i p\uc0\u363 r\u7751 asya p\u363 r\u7751 am\u257 d\u257 ya p\u363 r\u7751 amev\u257 va\u347 i\u7779 yate ||
\f1\i0 \
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\b \cf2 Thus:
\b0 \'a0That is Complete. This is complete. From complete has emerged complete. After taking complete away from complete, what remains is also Complete.\
The Nature also operates on a silent agreement. One for another time\'85\
Hare Krishna\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Living in Pjyamas\
You come home tired; knackered and knocked out. You had the usual day. You probably dozed off that five minutes extra in the morning that triggered the start of a frenzied day. Everything had to be done in a hurry; by the time you got to breakfast, the delay was extended to ten minutes. God alone knows who ate the five minutes you did not even snooze.\
Anyway, you either go for a breakfast that is not filling or you skip it altogether. You justify skipping your breaky saying it will help you shed some weight but you do not want to think about the damage it will cause including insulin level in your blood that is now matching economic inflation. You turn on the lousy radio in your car, go through the traffic slower than an old snail. You reach work. Before you take another breath, you log on and fire off an email or two, almost silently declaring your time of arrival.\
Hectic day! Pointless meetings, useless attendees, baseless targets, senseless spending, reckless execution, endless emails, mindless planning and only lesser remuneration; in short, all the elements were present to make your day the usual corporate day. You spend your day exchanging nods in agreement, when in fact, you violently disagree internally. But for the sake of maintaining world peace, you let it go with a nod and a grin. You exchange smiles and\'a0pleasantries with the one you would happily hew the head off and feed on his gore before walking around holding his hacked head by its hair, like a prized possession, in the manner of a wrathful goddess. I dare not think what if the victim happens to be bald.\
It is lunch time. You are hungry but because of the missed breakfast, skim milk coffee, and consequently raised insulin levels, your appetite is deluded like the conditioned mind. You are not sure what to eat, just like you are unsure why you are even working the way you are. A full meal is a bit too much and just the sandwich is a little too less. Oh! these choices. You are asked to join for lunch by your co-workers. You promptly agree and you all go in a group like a flock of sheep. You land in a noisy restaurant, as if the inner turmoil is not enough. Everybody is talking, no one is listening and barely anything can be heard. A natural start, that. You finish that lunch, pay your share of the bill and get back to work. It feels boringly quiet. You finish the rest of your day.\
You start commuting back to home. You are too tired to think. Maybe, you take a couple of personal phone calls. You turn on some music and not the radio channel hoping it may relax or excite you. But in between traffic and changing lanes, before you know it, you are home. Maybe you are someone who jumps\'a0straight\'a0into the shower or perhaps you eat a light meal, brush your teeth and take that shower that makes you feel fresh and light. Either way, after the bath, the most important moment of the day arrives: Lo and behold, it is emerging on the horizon \'97 you slip into your pajamas.\
It feels as if the stressful day did not happen. You feel free as the flying bird and quiet as mouse. Let us not think about your spouse\'92s decision to flick through each channel on the satellite TV a minimum of forty seven times. Getting back to you, slipping on the pajamas has done something to you. You feel yourself. You are now laughing, talking, eating and behaving differently. The fourteen dollar walmart-retailed-made-in-china pajamas have done what the four-hundred-dollar Versace trousers could not. You just feel very comfortable. You may have the compulsive disorder of ironing your night suit but that does not deter you for you are being yourself now. What\'a0miraculous pair of pajamas!\
I hope you know what is happening behind the scenes. You are feeling free and light because you are being yourself. You do not have to pretend to be someone else. \'a0Mostly that someone else is not a person but a role. It may be the role of a competent worker, a kind boss, a friendly peer, a team player at work, a disciplined driver on the road, or a good listener on the phone, a caring mother, a loving partner, a compassionate fellow, a fine daughter and so forth. You are not given the chance to be in your pajamas. You always have to wear the garb of the role. The guise you put on also, as if automatically, brings about some changes, however subtle, prominent or temporary, in your personality. Because now you are \'93playing\'94 a certain role, you have the invisible burden of getting and doing it right.\
The act of turning inward is like putting on the comfy, wrinkle-free, and soft pajamas. Once you are in your pajamas and you learn to be comfortable seeing clad in one, you not only perform every role far more effectively but also with much greater ease, almost effortlessly.\
Living in your pajamas means being yourself. No make up, no matching shoes or accessories, or carrying yourself a certain manner, no crap \'97 just you being who you are. You no longer have to laugh softly with great finesse, you can roar like the thunder, peal upon peal, if you so wished. Why bother having or wanting anything from those who will only give you that if you were a certain way! Accept others as they are and do not waste your time being someone else if they cannot accept you for who you are. Once you turn the tables on your mind, everything will become clear. You will love everybody in their pajamas and they will only have love and respect for you. All other emotions are now in the dirty laundry with your other garbs.\
Go on now! Find yourself that pair and learn to live in it. You need to discover yourself before you can be yourself. After all, even in pajamas, an XXL will not give you comfort and warmth if you are designed for an XS.\
Discover your own truth. Wear your own pajamas \'97 preferably made from natural material like cotton, for the last thing you want is to have that pair made from artificial fabric. Clearly, you are not getting ready for a fancy dress competition. In your pajamas, you may resemble the mighty pooh or the miniature teletubby, but whoever you may look like, you will entertain yourself heartily; know that much for a fact.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Life is like a Trip to the SuperMarket\
Life is like a trip to the supermarket. You go grocery shopping mainly as a matter of necessity. You may be someone who either makes a mental note of what all you are going to buy or someone who is in possession of a well documented list before you enter the supermarket. In any case, once in, you invariably recall some additional items. You are not too keen to make the trip but it seems you have no choice. You park your car away from the unfettered shopping carts that are ranging the parking lot with no sense of direction and with complete disregard for basic traffic etiquette.\
You walk towards the supermarket; just before you enter, you pull out a shopping trolley with a jerk. Your freedom is now limited to the movement of the cart. You are greeted by a colorful view of fresh produce and big flashing cards depicting price. An overwhelming feeling takes you over; a few moments later, you are lost. You are now walking past various aisles like the mouse trying to navigate its way through a maze. There is stuff everywhere. It does not matter which way you dart your glances or still your gaze, there is more stuff. And many choices for every item, at that. Did it really have to be that complicated!\
Your shopping cart that is now full of items is behaving more like a pram with a handful three year old in it. You have to put in the extra effort to make it move with precision. Exactly like a child\'92s pram, you do not feel comfortable leaving it unattended. You do part with it to quickly grab that item, you keep a watch on it \'97 as if, a group of cart thieves are waiting for the right opportunity or there is a cart ranger who will book you for parking in the wrong zone. Anyway, feeling drained and thirsty, you get in the check out lane. You are greeted with the customary smile by the check out operator.\
They ask you if you are doing well. But they are not really interested in knowing that, for, they start scanning before you can answer. At least, they are not judging you from your purchases; the fact is they could not be bothered. In other words, they are as interested in knowing about you as you about them. The total turns out to be more than expected. You bite the bullet paying it. You also make a soon-to-be-forgotten mental note on\'a0being careful about your purchasing next time. You walk up to your car, unload everything from the trolley and load your car only to unload again when you get home just a few minutes later.\
So strikingly similar to life, your supermarket experience. Your life may be easy if you know exactly what you want, but this world can be an overwhelming place. The work of making choices does not cease till your last breath. Like grocery shopping, the choices you make determine the financial and material outcome at the check out time. The more you choose to load in your cart, the more tied you are to it. Like the supermarket purchases, some things you buy impulsively, others, thoughtfully and yet there are many you pick based on looks while there are some you thoroughly scan and compare before buying.\
The way you act in life can be ascertained from your way of grocery shopping. If you are looking for a responsible partner, carefully observe other shoppers and pick one from those who are buying off a list prominently held in their hands. If however, you are looking for the adventurous type, look for the most stacked cart with the owner who is on the phone and who also buys the chewing gums and magazines while waiting at the checkout counter. That is that for the partner tip; after all, you may as well pick the one you will share your meals with from the place you buy the ingredients from.\
Anyway, getting back to the choices, you feel walking through the various stages of life is an automatic act \'97 almost like moving through the aisles of the supermarket. You feel that way because of your conditioning. Only if you choose to stop, think and reflect on your life, your choice maybe wholesomely different to the current ones.\'a0Just like the checkout operator, the worldly conventions are only customary.\
The world is not really interested in what you mean; just so long you buy the stuff and pay your bill, you are labeled worthy. But regardless of how much you buy, or if anything at all, you still have to exit and get home. You may love or hate the supermarkets, they are only transient; you must leave eventually. There are no chairs there for you to sit and wait, no place to hide either. Such is the reality of this world too. It is transient, a temporary place and a permanent illusion. This is not your permanent home, certainly not that of your soul. You will only feel peaceful when home. Irrespective of the size and state of your home, you do not feel lost in your own home.\
The world inside is your home. It is complete; eternally stocked with all the provisions, it is plush and full of infinite luxury. No stress, no loading-unloading, no bill payments, no making choices all the time. Whatever you want, and, can ever want, is available in plenty. Go home! Be at home!\
Next in the line, please\'85\
Hare Krishna\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
\
Living with Love\
If I were to pick the most important word from the dictionary, without a moment\'92s hesitation, I would pick Love. The greatest and most sublime of all emotions is love. Its\'a0profundity renders it unjust for love to be merely classified as an emotion, it is a state of being, a transcendental state at that. The more firmly you are situated in love, the greater the bliss; such bliss that is immanent in you will start emanating from you. If it were to come down to just one difference\'a0\'a0between being divine and being human, it would be former\'92s ability to always only give out love compared to the latter who, sometimes, falters.\
This genuine word most pure, in this artificial world mostly impure, however, has been overused and abused so often that it has become a blanket term for many things it is not. A lot of people love someone or some philosophy or a cult or sect or their possessions and devote their entire life, saving for and protecting them. People also refer to growing in and out of love and consequently relationships. Some pledge their life and \'93love\'94 to each other only to separate later on. There are many who find their love fade away with\'a0time\'a0like the most glittering colors do under the sun. But if it was true\'a0love, how could it fizzle away? Truth, while it may be not be absolute, is not dependent either. Similarly, true love is not conditional, for what is based on certain criteria is more an agreement.\
Many a few are able to love God truly. God does not talk to them or directly answer their questions. He does not partake of their offerings nor does he ever show His form to them. They still continue to love God and cry for Him however. If they are not doing such worship out of any fear or with a view to attain some objective, they are close to true love. Whether they are completely established in love can only be ascertained when they hold a communion with the God in a human being. If they are still able to love everyone with the same emotion, they have become an embodiment of love. When, the only emotion they reciprocate with is love, they are no less than love incarnate. Know that in the presence of such person your own being undergoes a silent transformation.\
Loving God is easy for He neither criticizes nor complements; He does not hug you nor stave you off. You have accepted Him the way He is. He is a product of your belief; unfortunately, often not your own belief but the one passed onto you. Loving God is still a divine act for a human being; loving all is a godly act of a divine being. If you do not have any realization of your own, and you do not have any knowledge about anything but if you choose to only return all emotions with love, people will offer you the highest place on the altar of their hearts and will worship you more than they ever worshiped God. When stroked by\'a0trouble you will be in their thoughts before God and when struck by joy they will attempt to contact you before visiting the shrine.\
So, how can you ascend to the level of a divine being! Actually, it is easier than you think; the practice may be harder than mere comprehension of the underlying philosophy. You must be comfortable with yourself and be contented with what you have in order to cultivate the emotion of love. You must also learn to stay inwards so you may not only maintain your blissful state but be\'a0imperturbed\'a0by the emotional, intellectual, and material offerings of the world. That will allow you to always only give out love \'97 pure, unalloyed and pristine.\
Love is innate in everyone. It is the cause of your existence and the basis of your being. It is often misplaced at the same time in most people. Love when misdirected takes the form of an attachment and when mispositioned, it promptly becomes an obsession. Till such time that you turn inward completely, you can make an effort to discover your present state of love. The following section will help you do that. Once done, you can repair it if damaged, rejuvenate if worn out, renew it if expired, and strengthen if weak. It is going to take some work but the rewards are infinitely priceless. Regarding the present placement of love in you, reflect on the following:\
People love different things and they do so differently. Often attachment, infatuation, attraction or certain desires ranging from lust to liking, from pity to passion are mistaken for love. Love may well be the basis of such emotions as well as the trigger but it is when love is polluted and no longer pristine, it permanently assumes one of the aforesaid forms. Love is very fluid, and, an apt shapeshifter. Of those who love, their love is generally divided among the following three in no fixed ratio; sometimes they only love one of the three, other times, only two. Your goal is to channelize all your love from other categories into the single most important one. Onto the categories:\
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\f4 \cf9 Those who love things\
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\f1 \cf2 There is no dearth of people who fall in this category. They love things and they are totally, head over heels, in love with their possessions. Personally, I am always amused when people are in love with non-living things. These ones are deeply attached to their cars, gadgets, accessories and so forth. Basically, for everything they own and has a price in the market, they are in love with that. If this person\'92s wife has a car accident, he is more worried about the car and insurance than his own wife. He may, only just, cleverly hide his emotions and customarily enquire about wife\'92s well being immediately followed by a series of questions regarding the car, damage and the like. A significant portion of their time is spent caring for their soulless possessions, the rest on talking about them and any remaining, worrying about them.\
Love is a peculiar emotion. It transforms\'a0you into the one you offer it to. You start loving a criminal, you will find yourself accepting his immoral ways becoming one yourself with your acceptance. You love a saint, you will turn into one too. Similarly, when you start to love things, you become a lifeless thing yourself. The only difference \'97 you have consciousness and things do not. When in love with things, you will not be able to love people; certainly not so freely or expressively. I hope you know that your car, house or golf clubs do not love you at all. They are just as ready and able in anyone else\'92s hands as in yours. If you continue to be a thing by loving things, you will soon be a thing forgotten as well. Because you are a thing now, you will either be outdated, obsolete or\'a0old-fashioned\'a0one day in the future, for, that is the fate of all \'93things\'94 eventually.\
If, sadly enough, you are one of these people, you need to do some serious thinking. Let go off your attachment with things. Direct all your love to the other category. Love only grows when distributed among living beings, for it is only in another living being that it lives, otherwise it dies. Loving things will drain you out of love leaving you hanging high and dry; too high for anyone to hear you and too dry to retain any fragrance or taste. If you do not start loving people infinitely more than you love your things, you will waste your beautiful life on lifeless things before the life in you flees away too leaving all, absolutely all such things, behind you for others to use and abuse at their will and leisure. Your dead photo hung incongruously, in a manner no less unceremonious, on a listless wall will be the only reminder that you ever existed.\
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\f4 \cf9 Those who love philosophy\
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\f1 \cf2 Some people are in love with a philosophy, a religion, a cult, a sect, a cause or a certain belief system. Of the above, a cause if dedicated to the welfare of others may be worth loving. The rest may deserve your attention, opinion or even sympathy but not your love. Remember, you are what you think but you become what you love. These people, the ones who love not things but a certain intellectual proposition, are still better than the first ones. At least, they develop their intellect or live their life in accordance with the religion or cult. All religions, I believe, have something wonderful to offer.\
There is a caveat though. An ongoing affair with a philosophy, can turn one into a fanatic and sometimes, an extremist. Once down that route, it is very hard to change. Since you adopted a doctrine, not based on your own discovery, but either at the whim of your mind or a superficial intellectual grasp, giving it your love will turn you into a superficial and dry person. Love perishes in dryness.\
Those who are in love with a philosophy or the like have bought into someone else\'92s opinion; consequently, their love, its concept, and its expression reduces to an artificial manufacture and opinionated theory. Most religious professions, paid or voluntary, social or commercial, fall under this category. Such practitioners consider the cause or doctrine above other human beings. Some will even give or take life for such cause.\
If, by any remote chance, you happen to be in this category which you may be justifying by branding your obsession as your passion, please, I implore you, take a good look and try to see\'a0trees\'a0from woods. If must you dedicate your life to a philosophy or a set of\'a0dogmas, at least, create your own.\
A borrowed one will only fetter you robbing you of your freedom. The\'a0ultimate\'a0attainment is to shift your focus of\'a0love\'a0from this one to the next category; as follows:\
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\f4 \cf9 Those who love other living beings\
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\f1 \cf2 You are the one who has learnt that fellow human beings, regardless of the virtual differences of race, creed, pigmentation, are just about as human as you and as divine as the One you worship. I thank you for gracing the planet earth. You make this world a beautiful place. You may practice whatever religion, you have discovered and understood the essence of spirituality. When you treat everyone like you treat yourself and see everyone as you see your God and when everyone only gets back love from you, you are a sage. True love is unconditional. It is not governed by the action-reaction laws of motion just as it is not a theory of physics.\
When you throw a stone or a flower in a lake, the lake accepts both with equal indifference. The stone drowns immediately; the lake accepts it and does not complain. But the lake thanks you by keeping the flower afloat. When you either expect or want anything in return for your \'93love\'94, be sure what you have is not love. When you give love conditional upon having something first \'97 be it mannerisms, love, respect, anything at all \'97 that is not love either. But, when the only thing you have to offer is love, that undoubtedly is love.\
Whenever you buy anything from the market, you always pay the price with money. Money is the only thing you offer to buy the intended item. The more you have the more you can buy. Equivalently, love is just about the only currency for all that is priceless. The more you have it, the greater your choice. The more you can give, the more you can buy. Just like you may have a million dollars, if you are not prepared to part with a dime, you cannot buy anything. You may be a great saint or a heinous sinner, if you are not willing to give love you cannot have any in return. When you give out every ounce of love you have in you, you will be rewarded with an infinite supply of bliss and love.\
Love is part of your very existence. If you want to experience bliss without treading an arduous path of tedious practices, just start giving out love. For every emotion you are offered, return it with love; for each gesture you are shown, gesticulate back yours of love, for every word uttered to you, articulate yours with love. Try this unfailingly for a few months and see the difference for yourself.\
Give your love to people, living beings, before you offer it to a religion or a thing. And things remain just that \'97 lifeless, soulless things. Tell your car that you are very sad today and see if responds with the care you always showed it. Talk to your God, your religion, telling them you are feeling low, and see if he comes out of the book, picture or idol. Try the same with a human being, you will at least get a response. Before you go tell another person of your woes, listen to someone with his and help him feel better. When done to a few people a few times, you will always have a listener, a carer, someone who wants you to be happy.\
I hope you know that your love is worth lot more than wasting on things.\
Go on! learn to love so you can learn to live! Express your love. Make someone feel special. Make others feel important. Make all feel human. Make everyone a recipient of your\'a0love. Make each one yours. If you are tired of being human, become god instead. Be divine. All of the above is only possible when you can live a life free of expectations. And that, in turn, is possible only after you have turned inward. Turning inward will open the flood gates of\'a0love\'a0and bliss. It is only natural then you will give out what you have in you. Imagine being infinitely loving and blissful and eternally so at that.\
Love.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Life is Like The Sky\
Life is like the sky, sometimes cloudy, other times, very clouded. The same sky offers a completely different view depending on the time of the day. At night it is full of stars and the waning or the waxing moon. During the day, it is full of light. Artificial lighting of cities make the beautiful star-studded sky hazy. The same sky when covered with clouds hides both the very bright sun or the soft moon. Clouds seem to come from nowhere followed by rain. Sometimes the same cloudy sky dislodges a hail storm, other times, the very quiet but cold snow.\
If you look up, you are looking at the infinite sky. If you look straight you may be greeted by the horizon creating the illusion of sky meeting earth. Rain, thunder, showers, snowfall, even day or the night are merely transient phases in the sky. The sky does not get affected by it. It remains infinite and blue. Moods of various seasons are allowed, if not accepted, by the sky in an unassuming and unattached fashion. It does not lose its unsullied nature. You can move to any part of the world, the sky stays the same. Whether it is the noisy jet that is flying or the quiet trackless bird, the sky does not discriminate. The clouds may be in the sky but the sky is not in the clouds. How ideal!\
Similarly, a life of purity will always be like the blue sky. If you are always aiming for something higher, a terminal point may never come just like if you are running towards the horizon, there is never a finish line. A rainbow always emerges in the clean sky. And sky is often clear and clean soon after the downpour. When you are experiencing rainy days, take an umbrella or sit tight, be patient, clear days are just round the corner. If you always want a clear sky, you may have to live in the normally inhabitable deserts. When life appears dark like the sky on the night of new moon, you can settle your gaze at the glimmering stars. When sun is spewing fire, do not stare at it. Let it be certain in your mind that all the colors of sky are only the most temporary phases.\
Your true nature like the blue sky is unaffected by all internal and external phenomena. If you always find it cloudy and muggy, you are merely looking at a photograph depicting that weather. Removal of that picture (read thought) from your sight will unveil a new one. It is merely your conditioned self that you do not experience the pleasant tropical weather all the time. When you turn inward, the sky is beautifully blue with pleasant temperature. You can be by the seaside or the Himalayas anytime you wish, absolutely at will. There is a microcosm in you. When you know who you really are, the clouds of ignorance and all negative emotions dissipate promptly. Only the warmth of love, the radiance of peace, the shower of grace, the clouds of compassion, the soft moon of kindness, and forbearance\'a0of the sky remains. You remain pure, unblemished, for that is how you really are.\
The dawn always follow the dusk, summers are greeted by the winters, days follow nights, but, these all are ephemeral expressions of duality; expressions of the conditioned mind and an interdependent phenomena. Is light absence of darkness, or, is darkness absence of light? Is joy lack of sorrow, or, is sorrow lack of joy? Is heat absence of cold, or, is cold absence of heat? In essence, these are subjective characterizations and dependent on the conditioning of an individual. A farmer in Australia may feel pleasant at thirty five degrees Celsius whereas an immigrant from Alaska may sweat at twenty five.\
While experiences of the body can not just be ignored, all things experienced by the mind can be turned into a sublime and uniform experience, a divine one. It is not that the self-realized will not feel heat or cold, he will bear both with grace. That is only for the external phenomena; for all emotions, desires and the like, the self-realized remains unaffected, unperturbed and alike \'97 just like the sky.\
Free yourself. Know yourself. Be yourself. Realize your Self.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The chosen Path\
When there is any confusion, it is not real calling.\
What is the difference between real thirst and illusory thirst? Real thirst can only be curbed for a short period whereas the illusory one disappears as soon as you are able to take your mind off it. When the calling is real, the decision is barely and rarely in the hands of the one ordained. Nature will automatically drag that person in his natural play field. Real calling is never a product of the mind, desired way of living is the result of cogitation and deliberation. In latter, one analyses a series of options available and chooses the best one. Real calling connects at a deeper level. It cedes all cogitation.\
If you choose your \'93desired path\'94 and feel it is not for you after you have started walking it, leave your desired path. Simple! Who says that one has to stick to something for one\'92s whole life? A good way to test is to start living it quietly. Live the desired way unannounced and see if this is what you want. Take time off and live it completely for a short period first. Once you feel that this is exactly what you want, you can make your decision public. Years ago, I stumbled upon a funny yet sublime quote: \'93If at first you do not succeed, don\'92t tell anyone.\'94\
Treading any new path requires that one gives up the old one. Imagine climbing a staircase. At some point in time, you must completely abandon the present rung of the ladder to get to the next one. With one foot on the preceding rung and other on the next one, it is impossible to advance. Often non-fulfillment comes when the seeker wants the best from his past with his present (read chosen) lifestyle. It does not work that way. A new lifestyle is a new lifestyle. It may not have any elements of the past. A tamed mind finds it easy to adjust and love it whereas an outwardly focused one wants the best of the both worlds. In fact, it holds true for all aspects of material life too. Mind is always making you compare your past with present to create a picture of the future, immediate or distant.\
If you are willing to relinquish \'97 not the world but your world of desires \'97 treading any path becomes easy. Without\'a0
\f2\i vair\uc0\u257 gya
\f1\i0 (indifference and dispassion towards the material comforts) it is not possible to tread any spiritual path and without\'a0
\f2\i abhy\uc0\u257 sa
\f1\i0 \'a0(spiritual discipline), it is impossible to get results. \'a0The path is arduous but peerless work meets priceless rewards!\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The Successful or Successfool\
\
Everybody likes to succeed. Since eons, the tradition has been that the passing generation conditions the upcoming with their definition of success. Very often, I find that people are trying to succeed based on someone else\'92s criteria and benchmark. Some are successful, some, full of success. Some succeed but do not know it, as a result they continue the toil and struggle; they are not successful but successfools. Some get fulfilled with their success, others only get fooled by it.\
Averagely, in a class of forty students, two get high distinction, three, distinction, and ten, credit with twenty getting just the pass. Five, however, fail to score above the threshold and are given a \'93fail\'94. Those who get fail, are they not successful? Or, the five who get high distinction, are they successful? The five who failed may well succeed at other endeavors. Their current grade is merely a stamp, a label, based on the criteria of some institution. While it is easy to see success vis-a-vis failure in this instance, the lines are offered blurred in other streams of life.\
Is divorce a failure of marriage or the partners? Is sacking an employee a failure of the employee, employer or the job? What about not getting to the top level, or failing to secure that job or promotion? How about not bagging that gold medal or securing that place in the intended school? Upon careful examination, you will notice that almost all the time, you are branded \'93failure\'94 because you are not good enough in the eyes of the one making the the judgement \'97 be it an organisation or an individual. In reality, it does not matter what others think of you., especially if you have the strength of individuality and your own character. The lives of the greatest achievers across the globe exhibit exactly that.\
The most divine preachers, and, materially, some of the most successful were, at first, deemed losers by their respective societies. But that did not deter them from pursuing their own path, on their terms, based on their own criteria, setting their own benchmark. When their persistence paid off, they had numerous followers and many takers of their path. The cattle only follow the shepherd because of shepherd\'92s resolve to lead the flock; when one starts following, the others follow suit. If the shepherd loses his resolve and does not set his own success criteria, he would soon be lost in the flock of sheep. Even his loud roars will drown in the bleating of sheep. And dogs, they are only used for rounding up the sheep and not for leading them.\
There is a huge communication gap between the shepherd and the sheep, absence of a common spoken language being the greatest barrier. But the strength of shepherd\'92s own leadership \'97 born out of determination, experience and individuality \'97 overcomes that easily. With a stick in his hand, a couple of whistling sounds and whispers, as well as servile dogs give shepherd the control and sovereignty.\
Succeeding at any endeavour can be compared to drilling a hole in the wall. The driller\'92s only focus is that hole at the time of drilling. The drilling machine and driller\'92s force are directed at that point on the wall with immaculate precision.\'a0 The outcome is achieved in no time with the focus, persistence and, equally importantly, the right tool. You can have the right precision, energy and attitude but using a spoon to drill a hole will only give you scraping on the wall.\
A focused mind is the right tool, almost like the multipurpose drill that comes with tens of attachments. A settled mind is the most capable and competent shepherd. The senses will then serve as the watch dogs. With noble intentions, clear goal, morality as the foundation, compassionate attitude, contented soul, a peaceful mind, clear conscience, relentless pursuit, incessant effort and iron resolve, you will be truly successful before long. It may sound a lot but in reality it is not.\
A mind that has turned inward with morality as the guiding light will supply you with all the other ingredients. For, your mind is the source of each one of them. If you can exercise surrender at that, with devotion and fervor to your God, the bulk of the work is done. You are ready for success to kiss your feet and be available to you at your beck and call.\
A common folly is to keep setting new goals when you get to the current one. It feels natural and normal but that does not qualify it being right too. If you keep shifting the goal post, you will keep working for the rest of your life. Your struggle between want-to-do versus have-to-do will continue. Ever setting new material goals is merely your mind fooling you and keeping you busy.\
Know what you want materially, give a portion of your life to attain that. Once done, consider busying yourself on things you have always wanted to do. Dedicate your life to the welfare of others or to your own spiritual attainment; both of which are not mutually exclusive; in fact, complementary.\
Although a matter of personal opinion, it is not worthwhile to waste your whole life on material pursuits. However successful, that will be a life incomplete and not without stress. Learn to strike the balance. If you are able to let go off your desires, your needs will come down accordingly. And with that, the need for material struggle will start to disappear too. I know many people who could retire and live a more meaningful, fulfilling and relaxed life. But they choose to continue with the struggle. Partly because their passionate and restless mind does not allow them to put their feet up and relax and partly because they do not know any better. Some, of course, do not want to know \'97 \'93successfools\'94!\
Treading the path of self realization with sincerity will ignite the wildfire of transformation in you. Everything becomes clear. The futility of vain efforts burns completely in that process. You will come to know success like never before. No more tides of desires in the ocean of bliss in you. No more leaking holes in the pot of your consciousness, decidedly none in your conscience. Just you, in your own world, with everything you may possibly need available at your command. Success embodied, success glorified \'97 \'93successful\'94!\
Go on! Be successful. Aim for inner success this time. Once you start to enjoy the inner journey, the outer one will appear listless, lifeless and meaningless. Know what you want and when you have it, be contented. Do not keep wanting more; a blunder, that.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
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{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://omswami.com/2011/12/king-in-the-cattle-nature-of-mind.html"}}{\fldrslt 
\f4 \cf4 \cb10 The Conditioning of Mind: King in the Cattle}}
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\f1 \cf2 \cb1 \
Once upon a time, there was a lioness. She dies during the course of giving birth to her cub. A small girl who had never seen a cub happens to be in the woods at that time. She picks up the cub and brings it home. The cub is fed goat\'92s milk and is made to live with other goats. They all grow up together. The lion starts to feed on grass like the other goats. Living like the cattle, the lion forgets its true nature.\
One day, while grazing along with the herd, the lion gets aloof and finds itself lost in the shadows of the jungle. As he attempts to navigate his way back, he gets even deeper in the woods. He feels scared and sees a wolf from a distance. The lion, unaware of his ferocity and out of ignorance, starts running for its life. However, much to his surprise all the other animals start running away as they see the lion approaching. The lion stops and thinks to make sense of what he just witnessed. An eerie feeling takes over him. He starts to feel there is more to it than meets the eye. He starts to ponder over the incident of other animals dashing upon his sighting. He decides to explore the matter further.\
He starts to move around a little more freely and a little less scared. Wherever he goes, he sees the same reaction: all the other animals start scrambling. It goes like this before he sees a group of lions feeding on a freshly killed bull\'92s gore. A latent desire to partake of the meat arouses in him. His surprise elevates to the level of shock. As if automatically, he feels the urge to make his own lunch. He decides to hunt down a calf. The joy he discovers in the hunt and feeding on the prey far exceeds any other he had ever experienced. Additionally, an innate sense of fearlessness emerges. He feels the jungle is his home and that no one around can dare to kill him.\
Similarly, your true nature is bliss and fearlessness. The lion in you has started behaving like the goats because it\'92s\'a0been brought up with them. This is called conditioning. \'a0You have lost sight of your true nature due to numerous factors. Predominantly, experiencing the world through the body since eons has made you forget who you really are. As a result, the connection with the Supreme Soul is lost.\
The bliss you seek does not exist in the world outside; instead, a whole world exists in the bliss within you. Self realization is about finding that eternal reservoir of bliss and peace. Your true nature is pure bliss and unimpeded joy, infinitely so. You have been conditioned, inadvertently or otherwise, by the society and other evolutionary forces. Your conditioned soul is a product of the collective intelligence of the world. You, however, are a product of your karma and your desires. You have forgotten your true nature because of the conditioning. Such conditioning has come to you in the form of religion, social, family, and moral values. Since eons, preceding generations have accepted such standards, mostly unquestioningly, passing them onto the successive ones.\
The world you see externally is merely a projection of the world within you. In fact, the world outside is an exact replica of the one in you. Your inner world is a product of your thoughts. Due to your forgotten nature, your inner world constantly gets affected by the world outside. If the inner world is in turmoil, the outside one will appear just as listless and doomed.\
The goal of the Yoga of Self Transformation is to help you discover and get back in touch with your inner world, your real nature. \'a0I can only share with you the practices and show you the path; its attainment is your personal matter.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The psychic imprints\
Imagine a spinning wheel painted with spectral hues. Since it is spinning its face appears illusory white. In reality, there is no white colour on the wheel but because it is spinning with a combination of the spectral shades on its face, it appears white. Similarly, mind is always moving. Like the spinning wheel, it creates an illusion of reality of the material world. It makes the world look like a permanent place. However, that is not so.\
In order to understand your true nature, the one independent and cleared of all conditioning, your mind must acquire certain stillness. To attain that stillness and examine the nature of mind, its movement must cease. It is only after such cessation you can see the real colours. Purity of discipline in your karma helps a great deal in achieving mental stability. Whatever you do with speech, actions or words leave an imprint on your mind. The objective of this article is to help you see how all karma have a residual trail. Such residue covers and conditions your mind.\
Most yogic texts demand the practitioner to follow strict karmic and moral discipline. Truly profound, if you ask me!\'a0Getting back to\'a0karma\'a0and their residue:\
Karma are of three types, namely, physical, verbal, and mental. Every action leaves behind an imprint. Physical actions may produce tangible residue whereas verbal and mental karma create psychic imprints. If you analyze the trail of any karma, you may be surprised how it may wane but never gets destroyed completely. It is the residue of each karma that conditions you. Let me elaborate with the help of an example. As follows:\
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\f4 \cf9 1.\'a0Physical \'a0Karma \'96 Tangible Residue\
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\f1 \cf2 All physical actions requiring touch are physical karma. Physical karma leave behind physical residue. Let us say you have an apple. You peel and deseed it to enjoy better taste. You eat the apple leaving the skin and seeds behind. Your action of eating the fruit has resulted in the residue of apple skin and seeds. You dispose of the uneaten parts. A cow comes and gladly accepts that as its food. The residue you left behind has now impacted someone else you may not even know. That apple you consumed is now in your body. It is processed by your digestive system. Two sets of residues are formed. The one that gets absorbed in your body is now traveling in your veins by way of blood and the unabsorbed portion (read residue) is let out of your physical system by way of urine and feces. Further, bacteria and other atomic entities may feed on such excreta.\
Your physical karma of eating an apple has left an imprint on you and other life forms. The residue from the apple that is in your blood directly affects your physical health. The residue eaten by the cow has a bearing on its health and on the quality of milk it produces. The excrements from your body have an impact on atomic life forms as well as the environment. It does not seem much, does it? Now imagine six billion humans on the planet doing that. Further, envision billions of other living creatures in the equation. The physical world is a residue of the collective karma. It is the residue that matters. \'a0Your physical karma has a telling impact on you and your immediate surroundings; plus, it has an impact on the whole world. On the path to self transformation, self control starts by following the discipline of living. The actual practices around this will be covered in due course under the appropriate sections.\
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\f4 \cf9 2.Verbal Karma \'96\'a0Psychic Residue\
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\f1 \cf2 Whether an instruction, statement, question, whatever it may be \'97 \'a0anything you utter is verbal karma. All verbal karma leave behind psychic residue. Words uttered by you have a great impact on your mind and consciousness as well as on the mind of those at the receiving end. A conditioned mind is supported and driven by psychic imprints. It is relatively easy to clean up physical residue but psychic one takes much greater effort. Let us go back to the example of the apple. Further assume you are a person of fine taste and that this time you have company while eating.\
The apple is deliciously fresh and crunchy with perfect sweetness. You remark about its taste and how you have never had such amazing apple. A few weeks later you may not recall the taste of apple but you are likely to remember what you had said at the time of consumption. In fact, anytime anyone else is going to make a similar remark about other fruits, it may remind you of the apple. And here is the interesting point: if you had not uttered anything while eating that apple, it would be much easier for you to forget about the apple. \'a0Why? Because you left no psychic imprint beyond the taste and sight of the fruit. On the path of self transformation, at some point in time, one ought to observe strict verbal discipline. I shall elucidate more on this in the relevant sections.\
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\f4 \cf9 3.Mental Karma \'96 Psychic Imprint\
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\f1 \cf2 The subtlest and most powerful of the three karma is a mental karma. It leaves behind a permanent trail; an imprint that is hard to erase. The origin of all karma of any type is a thought. Pursuit of a thought is mental karma. It has an immediate impact on your mental state, a lasting impact on your consciousness and an everlasting effect, however subtle, on your mind. Once again, let us go back to our example of apple. This time, you do not have the apples with you. The thought of an apple crosses your mind. You do not drop that thought. Instead, you start to pursue it. From the original thought of the apple, you are recalled of the time you last had an apple. That thought may link you to the thought of buying the apple from the shop.\
Just note that the initial apple-thought has now shifted and you are now thinking about the shop. The shop owner\'92s picture and communication flashes in front of you. You recall giving money to seller. You are reminded of another customer, who was shopping for bananas, standing next to you. You further recall how she was carefully picking the bananas and her physical attributes. You are now reminded of her statements, her voice and how she paid to the shop owner. You are tossed back to the thought of the shopkeeper because he returns you the change with your bag of apples. You take the bag and start walking. You are now reminded of the market conditions. You may further recall some unpleasant incident that happened one time in the market. And on and on and on\'85\
Had you dropped the thought of apple at the very moment it emerged, you would not have gone through the grind of mental karma. And all this depends on your memory. \'a0Only if you had remembered to not think of things other than the object of your meditation, you would have enjoyed a lucid, crisp and gratifying session of meditation. I hope you know that an average human being goes through sixty thousand thoughts during the course of twenty four hours. No wonder you enjoy sleep! At least, you get some break. The act of concentration is designed to instill a discipline of mental karma. And, the art of meditation is to maintain that state.\
Memory has a very important role to play in correct meditation. When you are able to retain only a part of your memory, that is \'97\'a0the object of meditation, you are moving towards achieving the tranquil state. However, memory is also your greatest hurdle in meditating correctly. Primarily because your memory is an accumulation, a storage tank, of your psychic imprints.\
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\f3 \cf7 \cb8 \
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\f1 \cf2 \cb1 It is not possible to empty your memory store. However, it is possible to drop the thought as soon as it starts to emerge. That leads to a state of non-recollection. When you hold your mind in the tranquil absorptive state, afflictions from psychic imprints start to fade.\
Your mind operates on the famous computing principle of GIGO \'97 Garbage In, Garbage Out. If you do ill, speak ill and think ill, the residue is going to leave you sick. If you do well, speak well and think well, the outcome is going to be well. Excess of anything results in excess residue. The more you eat, the greater the inventory, the bigger the headache of managing it. Imagine having a warehouse stocked up with unnecessary widgets. Your mind is a warehouse. Do not stock it up with useless stuff. Watch what you do, say, and think; transformation will begin automatically.\
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\f1 \cf2 \cb1 In the absence of wind the flame stays steady; similarly a tranquil mind remains still in the absence of wind of desires. And once again: desires are simply thoughts un-abandoned.\'a0With an ever present mind that has turned inward or surrendered to the Divine, you will never find yourself pursuing unwanted thoughts. In that state of non-pursuit, how can there be any disagreeable reactions from you? In the light of the vigilance of the still mind, how can there be any deviations from the object of your meditation (read bliss)? A mind that has gone empty fills with love naturally.\
Just like body gets tired after prolonged physical work; just like you get tired if you speak continuously for long periods, your mind gets tired from unceasing mental karma. A complete adoption of the yoga of self transformation in your life, living and character will allow you to enjoy deep dives in the ocean of bliss within you. A fit body, restrained speech and a calm mind \'97 natural outcome of correctly treading the path.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The untamed mind\
On the road to Self Transformation, we will begin with mental transformation. Mind is made up of thoughts and such thoughts are devoid of any essence. Thoughts take the form of conversations. The practice of observing silence forms the basis of mental transformation. In this post, I am expounding on the nature of conversations. In the next post on Self Transformation, I will cover the actual practice.\
Of the human urges, a great one is the urge to talk. It is believed that all living beings communicate in their respective languages. Humans, however, due to developed intellect and conditioned self, have developed the system of holding elaborate conversations. If you look around you will find most people talking most of the time. A lot that is being talked is not heard. The urge to talk arises directly from the restless mind. Whether such talk is useful or useless, positive or negative is subject to individual interpretation. Before we delve deeper, I would like to elucidate the types of conversations, their point of origin and impact thereof. Purely from the perspective of engagement of mind, they are of three types: Here:\
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\f4 \cf9 Gross Conversations\
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\f1 \cf2 These are the outcome of an outwardly focused mind. All conversations held with others using words or gestures are physical conversations. Majority are holding these for most part of the day. This could be in the shape of writing emails, phone calls, in-person conversations and the like. Gross conversations, believe it if you can, add to the unrest of the mind. These ones are the primary cause of one\'92s turning outward. A mind that has become extrovert will compel you to derive all enjoyment from external phenomena. An external journey is incapable of offering you permanent bliss. It may have many short steps of joy or pleasures but not an infinite supply.\
A good way to start turning inward is to reduce the number of these conversations as much as possible. Given your personal, professional and social engagements, it may not be possible for you to cut down on these a great deal immediately but getting started with resolve will unfold the path for you step-by-step as you continue to move. Once you get used to staying quiet for long periods, you will experience certain quietude of the mind. That will, ineluctably, diminish the urge to talk. Next time you want to talk about weather, politics etc, hold the urge for it is unlikely you will gain anything out of it, and, chances are that the other person is not actually listening to your point of view anyway. Most people are not really listening but simply waiting for the speaker to finish his point so they can begin theirs.\
Most social conversations are pointless and unnecessary engagements of the conditioned mind. With the advent of social networking sites, such conversations are becoming a greater part of the lives of many; only contributing to impatience and restlessness of the conditioned mind.\
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\f4 \cf9 Mental Conversations\
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\f1 \cf2 These ones are the result of an unsettled mind. When you are not talking to someone, chances are, you are holding a communion with yourself. Thoughts when pursued are mental conversations. These do not allow your mind to rest and settle. Mental conversations are also the greatest hurdles in holding lucid sessions of meditation. Due to conditioning since ages, your mind has got so used to talking that either it is holding a gross (read physical) conversation with an external entity or it is talking within you with itself. The unfailing sign of a restless mind is its inability to stay quiet. A mind that is brooding over matters, or a whining negative mind, a lustful passionate mind or a talkative restless mind are examples, triggers and boosters of mental conversations. The only two ways, known to me, of stopping these conversations are either engaging your mind elsewhere \'97 a temporary fix \'97 or, quieting your mind \'97 a permanent solution. The former can be achieved by pursuing an intellectual desire (read The Desire Tree for more on this term) and the latter can be achieved by either firmly establishing yourself in the bhava of bhakti or the practice of meditation.\
The path of meditation, albeit arduous, when trod with focus and resolve yields great results. Till such time that you achieve proficiency in the practice of meditation, start being aware of your mental conversations. Each time you find yourself holding a mental conversation, stop it. Do not stop it by trying to control or curb it, instead stop it either by ignoring it or by concentrating on the point of your focus. Remember, your mind only talks if you listen to it.\
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\f4 \cf9 Subtle Conversations\
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\f1 \cf2 When you are not talking to someone else nor are you holding a self-communion, in great likelihood, you are holding a subtle conversation. Since the mind is unsettled and restless, you want to keep it engaged, almost involuntarily. Like the hyper and naughty kid the parents want to keep busy. Wonder what subtle conversations are! When you are not talking to anyone nor to yourself but you are watching others converse, you are holding a subtle conversation. Harder to detect, your mind is actually processing information helping you either derive joy or displeasure or simply just stay busy. With these ones, you cannot directly contribute or affect any change. Watching TV or listening to radio are examples of subtle conversations. Stereotypically, without prejudice and justification, men do not hold the first two types of conversations as much as women, therefore, they often compensate by engaging in these ones. You will find men glued to TV more than women and more frequently at that. The more restless the mind, the greater the flicking through the channels. Reading a book is a more useful form of subtle conversation. For, your mind is more listening than processing and directly engaging in an act of learning.\
In essence, an untamed mind must find an outlet and conversations provide exactly that. How can the mind attain a quiescent state if it is always talking! It is for this reason that people find sleep relaxing. For, among benefits to the body, at least they are not aware of the talkative mind beyond recollection of their dreams. Is it any wonder that brain cells only get repaired during sleep? A good way to understand your reliance on subtle conversations is to make a resolution to not watch TV, read newspaper or listen to radio for a certain number of days. The degree of dependence on anything can be only be ascertained when you are deprived of it.\
The nature of conversations, e.g. material or spiritual, can have a temporary bearing on the state of your mind. Any conversation can be pleasant, unpleasant or neutral. The pleasant ones you find engaging and the unpleasant ones you want to avoid and the neutral ones can swing either way depending on your interest. And interest in any conversation is the direct result of the conditioning of the mind. Someone who has conditioned his mind with repositories of information on politics or automobiles will find those topics interesting compared to those who may be more interested in fine arts or literature, for instance.\
Mind is quite quiet when it has been tamed so as to not hold any of the aforesaid conversations. It is in that quietude alone you will start to experience the true nature of your mind. Once you are able to hold that quietude starting from long periods to as long as you want, deep tranquil absorption (samadhi) is imminent. The real work begins once you are able to sustain and maintain your state of Samadhi. More on that will follow in due course.\
As for the actual practices you can adopt to rid of these conversations, I shall document those in due course starting from the next post on the present subject matter. For now, just the awareness will supply you with enough fodder. And, of course, you can make a conscious effort to reduce the number of conversations across all categories and start enjoying the benefits of a quiet mind.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Pain is Inevitable\
A quote usually attributed to Buddha says, \'93Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.\'94 What a profound statement!\
There is no suffering if you can let go. Pain becomes immaterial in the absence of suffering. I am reminded of a story I had come across a while ago. As follows:\
After a day of preaching and alms, two fellow monks, in brimming youth, of more or less the same age, with one being more senior, were returning to their monastery while the sun was returning to his abode. Firmly established in their conduct, they would walk with their heads down and glances scanning not beyond two feet. Those were the days of monsoon and the gods seemed happy as it rained generously that day too. The valley was green and puddles of water looked like patches of random art on the unpaved roads. Their monastery beautifully set in the magnificent mountains was past a rivulet, barely six feet wide, that would have strong water current during the monsoons.\
Naturally, they had to cross the rivulet to get to the monastery. As they arrive at the bank of the river, they see a beautiful young woman, white like the pearlescent snow-capped mountains of the valley, with a softly radiating face like the morning sun, standing there still but somewhat anxious. They exchange glances; the senior monk understood that the young lady was afraid of crossing the swollen rivulet.\
Without any verbal communication and with no further ado, he gets closer to the feminine idol and gently picks her up in his arms. He crosses the river and puts her down, even more gently, on the other side of the river. She bows in gratitude and respect before making tracks towards her home.\
The younger monk is somewhat troubled by the actions of the senior one. Out of veneration and respect, however, he stays quiet. The two monks continue walking towards their destination. Silence persists for a good few hours before it is broken by the junior monk.\
\'93Can I please ask you a question, if I may?\'94 He mutters.\uc0\u8232 \'93Yes, of course.\'94 The elder one replies.\u8232 \'93According to our code of conduct, we are not allowed to touch a woman.\'94 His statement fails to hide the imminent question hiding in it.\u8232 The senior monk says, \'93Yes, indeed.\'94\u8232 The younger one finally asks, \'93So, how come you carried that young woman across?\'94\u8232 \'93I did not carry the woman, I simply lifted the one in need, \'94 the elder one says, adding, \'93Besides, I left her on the other side of the river and you are still carrying her, brother.\'94\
Most people do not want to let go, many others, do not know how to. On the journey of self transformation, under the practices of mental transformation, the next post in the series will highlight the practice of letting go. Stay tuned.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Devotee\'92s Revolution\
Around six hundred years ago, when Indian belief system was deeply rooted in casteism, there lived a devotee called Dhanna Jat.\
Unlettered, devoted and hardworking, Dhanna was a servant in the house of a brahmin. His master, considered elite, was a priest well versed in chanting the vedas and an expert in conducting religious ceremonies. The brahmin was a vaishnava and an ardent devotee of Krishna. He was devout in carrying out his daily rituals. He worshiped Krishna on shaligrama shila, a type of stone found in Gandaki river. Since times immemorial, it has been a common practice among the vaishanavas to worship shaligrama.\
Dhanna always felt a natural attraction towards shaligrama and he longed to worship Krishna on that sanctum stone. Many times he requested the brahmin for a shaligram shila and the method of worship. The brahmin, however, considered Dhanna a simpleton. Whenever Dhanna raised the topic, his master told him that he was was unworthy and unfit. He told Dhanna that elaborate procedures and rituals were needed to worship God and that since Dhanna was not a brahmin he had little chance. Dhanna was disappointed but not disheartened.\
He kept serving his master and pleaded at every opportunity to have a shaligrama. Ultimately, his master thought that there was no harm in giving him just any other stone; Dhanna wouldn\'92t know the difference anyway, he thought. So, he gave him an ordinary rock. Dhanna thanked his master and genuinely believed the stone to be a saligrama sila. He asked his master the method of worship. The master said, \'93Just offer him food twice a day and bathe him and so forth. In summary, treat him like a living entity, like your very own, your God!\'94. Dhanna, obviously, took to abiding.\
During his lunch hour, he bathed that \'93ordinary stone\'94 and offered it seat on the floor he sat and clothes made from used but washed tatters. He opened his tiffin; it had four chapatis, unleavened bread, made from corn flour and spinach. He spread them in front of the stone and invited Krishna with greatest fervor. A few minutes passed but there was no sign of Krishna. Dhanna increased his intensity and resolved to not eat till Krishna partook of his lunch. The lunch hour passed. No sign of Krishna. Dhanna was starting to feel really hungry. He persisted, however.\
Another two hours later, his master came looking for Dhanna. Upon enquiry, Dhanna told him the whole story. Brahmin laughed his head off and called him the greatest fool of all times. He told him that this was how God accepted the offerings. That, Dhanna\'92s job was to offer and that God had accepted it. But he sat unmoved. He said that he was real, his food was real, therefore, if God really accepted his food, He would have eaten for real. Brahmin shook his head in disgust and disbelief and told him that he had better either show up at work right away or lose his job. Dhanna did not respond, he was too lost in his own world.\
Tears of love and devotion started trickling down Dhanna\'92s face. He sat there motionless calling out for Krishna, not using any vedic mantras but in his own language. Many hours ticked by. Pangs of hunger were shooting like poisoned arrows in his stomach. He decided to persist. It almost became a battle between his resolve and God\'92s grace. Food started to go stale. One after the other, eight days passed. Dhanna was as good as dead; almost breathing his last.\
Gallons of tears, thousands of calls, eight sunsets, and almost two hundred hours later, Krishna manifested his form in front of Dhanna. Krishna, in His glory, with that most charismatic smile, with that maddening fragrance that emitted naturally from Him, with those eyes that contained the brilliance of a million suns, that radiance on his face like that of infinite full moons, sat right next to Dhanna. He started eating the chapatis. Dhanna watched unblinking; he was not surprised though, for, his faith and resolve underscored his belief of Krishna actually partaking of his offerings.\
Krishna took one chapati and ate it. Dhanna was overjoyed. Krishna took another. And then another. The God had manifested to satisfy His devotee. The King of the Kings, the One who dined in great majesty, was sitting on the floor eating His devotee\'92s offerings. After Krishna had three chapatis and He was ready to take the fourth one, Dhanna, looking askance, held His hand. He told Krishna that he was very hungry too and that at least one chapati should be left for him, especially since he had not eaten for eight days straight. With a mellifluous and soft laugh Krishna put his divine hand on his devotee\'92s head. A billion darts of bliss pierced through his very being. Tens of finest dishes manifested right there and Krishna fed Dhanna from His own hands.\
Resolve is the name of the living thought, the sublime emotion, that has gone beyond reason. Resolve, when accepted by the conscious mind becomes belief. Belief coupled with devotion gives birth to faith. And there is nothing that I know of that is unattainable with faith. However, faith alone does not suffice. The recipe of self realization requires faith plus other ingredients; for another time.\
The next post in the series will shed light on the practice of resolve.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
My Time in the Himalyan Mountains\
I have a small hut, more like a little cottage. It is nicely furnished. It has wooden doors, plastered walls and an attached washroom. It also has a glass window of dimensions five feet by five feet. It is my window to the outside world in a way. Out of the twenty four hours in a day, twenty two or more I spend in my little world. I write, meditate, chant, do everything here. I talk to my deity right here in this hut. Call me hallucinated if you wish, if that better fits your mental framework, if that helps you be a better human being; I am at perfect ease with that. I do not know how to word my world, language fails me just like logic and intelligence do.\
There was a hailstorm last night followed by downpour. The gods were quiet before it started alternating between hail and rain again. The sky was dark and looked sonorously deep, almost like an abyss. The sound of rain drops knocking on the tinned roof of my hut broke the morning silence of the wee hours. It was still dark, in fact, very dark. During the days of intense meditation in the woods, I used to meditate from seven in the evening till four in the morning; basically meditated all night. I would take a break before resuming at nine for another straight stretch of six hours. In between the five hours of morning four and nine, I would sleep, eat, perform yajna, fire offerings, and do everything else. Today it was four in the morning again.\
But! I was not in the remote woods in some secluded spot. Instead, I was hearing the tap dance of hail while snuggled up in the duvet, the bliss inside and the warmth outside completed my world. I pulled the curtain aside, while still lying in my bed, to look out of the glass window. It was black outside, nothing was visible; as if the illusory world revealed its true nature. I put the curtain back on. I felt grateful to have a roof that was not leaking. There were no mice or rats around, no spiders, no bugs, insects nor hornets. I was nicely wrapped in my quilt, almost like sausage in a hotdog. There were no gusts of snowy winds blowing on my face.\
This hut has a tinned roof, a new roof, as opposed to the old thatched one in the woods where uninvited living guests would fall from the roof right on me. I was lying on a clean bed. Water was not dripping from the walls. I could sleep with my legs fully stretched. It used to be so cold in the jungle that it was not possible to spread your legs; you had no option but to sleep somewhat curled up. Primarily because I did not use firewood beyond the one hour daily yajna. The tarpaulin that covered the thatched roof in the woods to prevent leakage, would fail to serve the purpose during windstorms, just like dry polemics do before transcendental knowledge . The heavy rocks placed on it to restrict the tarpaulin from flying away were just no match against the merciless Himalayan weather. Great power comes naturally from coupled flexibility and intensity, that is the reason winds can be so mighty. So I think.\
I pressed a switch and the light came on. What a novelty! I thought. A few moments summarized and reminded me of eighteen months of holding the flashlight in between my teeth so I could use my hands to do the work and here I was today that I pressed some button and the whole room was lit. I opened the washroom door. It had hinges and it could open and close in easy movements. There was no such door in the woods. Just a plank to cover the opening. Today, for a moment, I felt I was in some wonderland with all these amenities around. However, it still is a \'93small\'94 wonderland, a tiny wonderland, compared to my wonder-world of inner bliss and oneness!\
Absence of something dictates the value of its presence.\
Just think again what all sometimes is taken for granted. Watch that breath! it is precious. That life of yours is priceless. And this moment, this very moment, now: a wonderful present. Be grateful. I am. Very.\
Hare Krishna.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
A strange world\
Once upon a time in a certain village lived a couple, a simple family, the average type, with one son of age thirteen. The three lived like most others in the world; the couple worked, earned money and took care of family\'92s needs. They had a donkey who used to add to their earnings; I am not talking about the man of the house. This was a four-legged one. Once their son fancied having a bicycle and pushed his parents to buy him a bike.\
The parents, however, were not in a position to afford but they gave in to their son\'92s demand and decided to sell the donkey and use the proceeds to buy the bike. The son was very happy and a little too young to be grateful; at thirteen, it feels that your parents owe it to you; at thirty, it feels the whole world owes you something; at fifty, one doesn\'92t feel one owes anything to the world; at seventy, one is so under one\'92s own burden of mental afflictions and expectations that he is done with the debits-credits of the world. So, they decide to take the donkey to the animal fair and trade him for money; so reflective of the way of the material world \'97 most are trading whatever they can for money.\
The animal fair was two villages away, almost thirty kilometers. They pack their provisions, take the donkey with them, and start walking. The four had barely walked a few kilometers when they met a group of four young men coming from the other side. One of the youth looked at the family of three with the donkey and remarked, \'93Look at these fools! They have a donkey with them and yet they all are walking. One of them could easily be on the donkey.\'94\
They all giggle and chuckle and let out a few peals of laughter as they continue walking their path. This family clearly heard the remark and they truly did feel foolish. The couple decided to do something about it; the world was laughing at them. So, they ask their son to mount the donkey as he was the youngest and likely to get tired. Everything feels in order. They continue on.\
As they get into the next village, some ladies, a mix of middle-aged and younger, coming from the opposite side, were on their way to the river. They started conversing with each other, parts of such conversation being clearly audible. One of them was saying, \'93This is the age of kali. Look at this young son! He is sitting on the donkey whereas his parents are walking. How much worse can it possibly get! If I had a son like him, I would have buried him alive.\'94\
\'93I just feel really sorry for the poor lady. The son is probably following his father\'92s footsteps. How else would he get the idea otherwise!\'94 said the other one.\
The couple look at each other, almost as if holding a quiet conversation. The donkey has no clue, he continues walking and the son gets some idea. The son gets off letting his mother mount the donkey. This naturally felt more right.\
Another few kilometers later, there was a group of old ladies sitting under the shade. They were chatting about nothing. It did not even particularly seem that they enjoyed such talk; they were not smiling or laughing. The freckles and wrinkles were exposing their exhaustion from living. As soon as they saw the family passing by, they made loud remarks, almost unanimously, as if rehearsed, \'93Look at the women of today! The poor husband and the young child are on their foot while she is riding the donkey.\'94\
\'93That\'92s the problem, they don\'92t want to work. They think they are queens.\'94 The other one pitched in.\
The lady felt truly ashamed and muttered to her husband that she wanted to get off the donkey. And she does so promptly.\
They cogitate and think it was best to let the man of the house be on the donkey. It did not feel entirely sensible but it felt in line with the conventions of the world. They get somewhat stressed about if they were doing it right. What would others think! and so forth\'85Nevertheless, the man ascends the donkey and they proceed. No sooner did they cross the village than they were greeted by a group of strangers.\
An old man in the group advises our man on the donkey, \'93It is really sad to see that your wife and son are walking in this scorching heat and you are comfortably seated on this donkey. Don\'92t be so hard on them. After all, your wife takes care of all your needs and who will be responsible if something happens to this young boy from walking in this heat?\'94\
The man heeded old man\'92s advice. And! they all mount the donkey. That was the only option left it seemed. But how could possibly any solution emerge from listening to everyone! As they proceed towards their journey, they see other traders on their way to the animal fair too. And one of them, in a voice frenzied and raged, yells, \'93Look at this indolent and vicious bunch! How cruel! They want to kill the poor animal. I hate people like them. After all, this animal helps them source food by working for them and making them money and they are rewarding him with such merciless treatment.\'94\
The lines were blurred as to who was riding who.\
It is the donkey who is supposed to follow unquestioningly but here his masters were playing world\'92s donkey.\
Here ends the story. Not the moral.\
Follow your heart. Not everything ought to have some meaning. Listen to only those who you know and trust. In the vain attempt to please everyone, you will end up no one and nowhere. Do not be carried away in the donkey\'92s world; you can have your own. Whether you want to ride the donkey, make it work or sell it \'97 you decide. It is your donkey, your world.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The Laughing God\
Many live their life seriously. They tend to take everything seriously, their goals, their things, their religion, their philosophy, their likes and dislikes, other people, themselves, everything. Life is a serious matter for them. They even laugh seriously. That is not necessarily a problem. I am alluding to a deeper issue: The Serious God.\
Next time, when you go in a temple, or your place of worship, just spend a minute or two to see how serious people are. Are they God\'92s children or His captives? Have they gone to the temple to receive some sentence? I am not suggesting that you go around looking like the Laughing Buddha when vedic chants are going on, I am simply saying that humor is divine in itself. A little humor can diffuse even the most difficult situations in life.\
I am unsure if dogs or other animals laugh or smile. They seem to express their joy gesticulating differently. Humor, among other things, is what sets the human race apart. Having a sense of humor or cultivating it can make you feel light and bright. Learn to laugh away at things, circumstances and situations. Try! it is not as hard.\
In fact, as I write this I am reminded of a couple of verses:\
\uc0\u8232 When one is joyous from within, sorrow reduces drastically, almost disappearing. And such contented and blissful yogin is able to take his mind off everything firmly establishing himself in the supreme soul.\
\uc0\u8232 The one who does not brood over matters and keeps himself free from expectations maintaining a cheerful disposition attains the highest form of bhakti\
\uc0\u8232 Maintaining a happy state is tapas of the mind\'85\
If your practices, your God, your path is missing humor, you should take a hard look at what it is that you have signed up for.\
Observe the glowing face of a child next time. Wonder why they are glowing? They can laugh heartily; they express themselves freely. They can laugh at their own mistakes, at their own idiosyncratic behavior and choices. So, next time, when you are out shopping, and they are out of your favorite book, bagel or brownie, you know what to do! Without the stomping and tantrums hopefully.\
They are happy as toddlers and as they start to get conditioned, they learn to become serious. I hope you know that God was laughing when He created the universe and beyond; for, if he was serious it would be impossible to create such wondrous and beautiful nature, atmosphere, climate, species and the rest of it.\
Let me end with a little story:\
Studded in the mountains in Japan stood a Zen monastery. Once, when the monks were meditating quietly, jitters of earthquake were felt. The master rushed to the kitchen with his disciples. After things calmed down, he addressed his disciples, saying, \'93You see that is the difference between a Zen master and an ordinary person. As you saw that even in the near-fatal crisis, I acted calmly and I led you all to the strongest part of this monastery. I did not panic. And it is because of that wise decision that you all are alive right now as you can see the ruins outside. However, I must admit that despite my control, calmness and composure, I did feel nervous. You may not have noticed it but that is the reason I gulped down the large glass of water on the table, something I wouldn\'92t do under the ordinary circumstances.\'94\
A young monk chuckled but stayed quiet.\
\'93And, what are you laughing at?\'94 the master asked looking somewhat upset.\uc0\u8232 \'93What you drank wasn\'92t water, Master,\'94 the monk stood up and said bowing down, \'93it was a large glass of soy sauce!\'94\
So, do you know the meaning behind this story? Oh! there is no meaning. Stop searching for meaning in everything. Past maybe had a meaning, future may have, present does not. It is too short to hold a comprehensible meaning, and it is for this reason you practically cannot define \'93now\'94, the present moment. Be in the moment. Learn to laugh.\
Self-realization does not mean that lose your human side. In fact, it means to be able to laugh at it.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Travel Light\
Once upon a time, in a certain village lived a holy man. Some thought he was an enlightened saint and many thought he was a senseless eccentric. Kids called him Khilona Baba, for he used to give them toys and candies. In the style of a mendicant, he would seek just enough alms to support himself for the day. Whatever was offered to him, be it rice, vegetables, bread, he accepted with grace. He never accepted money. He seemed contented. However, he demanded toys or sweets to go with the alms.\
The villagers respected him so they often, with the alms, gave used toys and sweetmeats to him. The mendicant would put it in a large bag he always carried and would give them out to the kids in the village. His behavior was atypical, his demeanor, kind, and his presence, divine. No one understood why he carried that heavy and large bag if he was truly a realized person. Some wondered, if the man was realized, why did he not give discourses, spread goodness and chant the holy names instead of walking around in shabby clothes, with that heavy bag, collecting toys like a scavenger only to give them away?\
One day, a group of men in their forties, playing cards under the banyan tree, stopped the passing-by sadhu.\
Mockingly, they said to him, \'93Please give us some knowledge so we may be enlightened. We are sure your big bag has all the vedas in it.\'94\
The sadhu dropped his bag on the ground.\
\'93This is it,\'94 he said, \'93this is enlightenment. This is self-realization. I have now given you the gist of the vedas.\'94\
The group thought that their doubts about him being crazy were only true after all.\
But, one man in the group pursued, \'93What does this mean? How can dropping a bag equate to the sublime vedic knowledge?\'94\uc0\u8232 The mendicant said, \'93This bag is a big burden I am carrying. I have dropped it. I am free now. This is all there is. Drop your bag. Do not carry the burden.\'94\
The group got inquisitive and one of them said, \'93So, if that is all then what is the next step?\'94\uc0\u8232 The sadhu lifted his bag again, adjusted it on his shoulders and said, \'93I am not carrying any burden. I am simply carrying a bag full of toys for the children.\'94\u8232 \'93It is about awareness and attitude.\'94 he added and went his way.\
There is no justification for the emotional baggage and carrying physical is rarely worth it. Clear your cluttered store of negative emotions. Empty your heavy bag of worries. Bare yourself, your conditioned self.\
Be free. Be fearless. Travel light.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Give or Take\
If you were given a choice what all would you like to take from, let us say anybody, from someone who could give you whatever you asked for; what would you say? Of course, the conscious mind, the conditioned mind promptly comes into play and chances are you would start evaluating the options.How much can he give? What all can he give? Why is he giving it to me? What all will I do when I get it? Who all am I going to share it with? And on and on and on.\
Conscious mind is very calculative. It forces you to calculate everything; emotions, however, are not based on calculations. They are spontaneous reactions. You tickle a toddler, he giggles right away. There is no calculation there. So, what all will you take if someone approached you and said that he could give you anything you wished? What if the person was only able to offer you material things? Would you say, \'93Give me money. A ton of it.\'94? What next?\
It is easy to prepare a list of things you would like to take. This is conditioning. But let me turn the tables for a moment. What all can you give? None; some; a lot; everything? Make two lists of what all you would like to take versus what all you are willing to give. If taking list is longer than the giving, you are already getting what you deserve from your life \'97 frustration and lacking. If both lists or of equal length, you deserve congratulations. You know how to live a balanced life. If your giving list is longer than the other one, you deserve honor; you must have something very special to be willing to give more than you want to take.\
If the taking list has nothing in it and everything is in the giving list, you deserve obeisances. You are God walking in a human body. Think about it again \'97 across all the religions in the world, the greatest are remembered for what they gave to the world. Everyone gets inspiration from what their idol gave or even gave up. Giving creates strength; it feeds the soul. If both lists are empty, you are in a sorry state of affairs.\
There is a famous story of a Zen monk I would like to share with you:\
Seisetsu, the Zen master, had a huge following. He required bigger premises for the monastery as the present one was proving too small to accommodate the growing crowd. Among his followers was a rich merchant, a well known wealthy man called Umezu. He decided to chip in. Those were the times when an average family\'92s annual expense would be no more than three gold coins.\
Umezu took an offering to his master and said, \'93Here\'92s a bag of five hundred gold coins from my side. This will take care of all construction requirements.\'94\uc0\u8232 Seisetsu said, in a plain tone, sounding as if accepting some burden, \'93Okay. I will take it.\'94\
Umezu\'92s ego was hurt. He felt the master was being rude and ungrateful in the manner he accepted the money. Just like fear and ignorance, ego and money has a peculiar and a natural relationship; the latter fuels the former.\
Decided to make a point about his philanthropy and status, he mumbled, \'93There are five hundred gold coins in that bag.\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93You already told me that.\'94 Seisetsu replied coldly.\
Umezu who was only slightly hurt earlier doubting perhaps his master did not hear him initially was now furious.\
He exclaimed, \'93Even for a wealthy merchant, five hundred gold coins is a lot of money.\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93So, do you want me to thank you for it?\'94 Seisetsu sneered.\u8232 \'93Yes! You ought to.\'94 replied Umezu promptly as much as anxiously.\u8232 \'93Why should I?\'94 Seisetsu scoffed, \'93The giver should be thankful.\'94\
How beautiful! The giver should be thankful. It is so true, you should be truly thankful if Nature chooses you as the medium to give out. Granted, the taker should be no less grateful either. Therefore, when you are acting as the giver be thankful and when you have the recipient\'92s hat on, be grateful.\
Ultimately, no one is giving or taking. Everyone is simply a medium. Gratitude is a divine emotion nonetheless. It is worthy of adoption and practice. Make sure you offer it to the right one though.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
From Conversation to Concentration\
To become a good meditator requires great concentration, and to become a great meditator requires supreme concentration. Concentration, especially one-pointed concentration, comes with practice. The more you practice, the crisper your concentration.\
Arjuna, the great archer and warrior, from the times of Krishna, was one of the five brothers. His immediate younger brother, Bhima was a ravenous eater, almost a fress, a gobbler in a nice way. It was a new moon night once, dead dark, and Bhima felt really hungry in the middle of the night. He sneaked into the kitchen, managed to find food and condiments and started eating right there; a normal act for him for he had been doing this ever since he was a kid. On this particular night, Arjuna was awake and he followed Bhima to the kitchen. When he saw his brother eating in such pitch dark with perfect ease, it startled him.\
He had an insight, \'93If Bhima can find his way to the kitchen, food, and eat in this dark as if broad daylight,\'94 he thought, \'93why can\'92t I do the same with archery?\'94\
Arjuna started practicing at night with great focus and perseverance. Later, it was this skill, of being able to shoot in dark, that saw him win an important battle against a formidable opponent called Jayratha.\
If you can hold your concentration for as long as you want, you are at the verge of discovering meditation in its truest sense. Concentration can be contemplative, as in playing chess for instance, or passive, as in watching TV etc, or, it can be absorptive, as in reading a book for example. Some day in the future, I am going to cover this in detail. For now, just know that the type of concentration required for meditation is one-pointed concentration. The Sanskrit term for such concentration is ek\uc0\u257 grt\u257 . Think of the time you tried to put a thread through the needle; that required one-pointed concentration. Such concentration is about intense focus and great attentiveness.\
\uc0\u8232 The adept, seated firmly in one posture, restraining his senses and mind, with supreme one-pointed concentration, engage himself in the practice of yoga.\
Allow me to narrate a famous story of Arjuna again from the great epic Mahabharata.\
Arjuna, his brothers, his cousins \'97 all from the royal family, and many others were taught by the incomparable archer-guru Dronacarya. Guru Drona spent years training them. One day he decided to test them. He hung a bird, carved out of wood, on a high branch of a distant tree. He called all his students. They were asked to stand in a line. The task was to hit the bird\'92s eye.\
He called the first student near him. The trainee got in position and was ready to hit before he was interrupted by Guru Drona who asked him, \'93What do you see?\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93I see trees.\'94 replied the student.\
Drona asked him to step aside rather than shoot.\
He repeated the exercise with each one of his disciples. They all gave different answers. Some said they saw leaves, others, birds, many, trees and so forth. Every time the master asked them to step aside.\
When it was Arjuna\'92s turn and he was put the same question, he said, \'93I am only seeing bird\'92s eye.\'94\
Drona asked him to shoot and Arjuna hit right on the mark.\
A simple story; all good things lie in simplicity anyway. Concentration is also an act of simplification; the complicated mesh of intertwined thoughts is decimated through the act of concentration.\
If you want to experience that inner bliss through the path of meditation, no matter how much you may dislike having to sit and work towards building one-pointed concentration, the fact is you will have to do it. Perhaps, now you can also understand the importance of the practice of resolve. It takes great determination, practice and patience to really perfect your concentration. Once done, not only are you going to have lucid sessions of meditation, you can also achieve just about anything you can ever wish for.\
Predominantly, because your thoughts become powerful and your consciousness, channelized. Think of a waterfall; drops of water are channelized. Such channelization is enough to form rocks from tiny silica matter and even cut through boulders. The very water drops when scattered in the form of rain are unable to accomplish the same outcome.\
Conversations stop you from concentrating. I will cover the actual practice of concentration in the next post in the series.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Two Types of Meditation\
\
Meditation is primarily of two types. One is called concentrative meditation, also referred to as fixed attentiveness, and the other one is called contemplative meditation, also known as analytical investigation. A good meditator is skilled at both. It is the meditator\'92s ability of staying on one thought for as long as he wants that determines the quality of his meditation. An important point to remember is that meditation is a skill, it is an art. It can be learned by the determined and mastered by the persistent.\
There is only one way to learn this skill, that is: practice, careful practice at that. And, there is only one way to master this art, that is: intense practice, persistent intense practice at that. Guided practice increases your chances of success multifold provided such guidance comes from a practical source, from an experienced teacher and not just a preacher, from an expert doer and not a smooth talker. If your guide cannot sit with perfect stillness, he may offer you a wealth of bookish knowledge but will remain incapable of guiding you from practical standpoint, much less impart any wisdom on the subtleties of meditation.\
In this post, I am going to briefly explain the difference between the two types:\
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\f4 \cf9 Concentrative Meditation\
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\f1 \cf2 In this type of meditation, the meditator stills his thought and settles his mind on an object of concentration. Refer to the previous posts on many exercises on concentration. This method is specifically designed to help the practitioner achieve stillness of the body and mind. Until you are able to achieve perfect stillness, you will not be able to lose body-consciousness, that is, you will continue to have distracting awareness of your body during your sessions of meditation. And till such time that you are able to completely rise above your body, you are not going to experience any cosmic oneness. Until you are able to achieve perfect stillness, all your experiences are mere intellectual fabrication.\
They have no intrinsic value and remain mostly meaningless. Such experiences are not replicable. They do not purify, cleanse, guide or strengthen you. This is the harsh truth. An intense practice of concentration stills the ten vital energies in your body helping you gain complete control in sitting still like a rock with ease.Concentrative meditation is the first step. If you are unable to concentrate on the desired object for as long as you want, you are not ready for any contemplation or analytical investigation. Predominantly because the mind is still restless it means.\
A restless mind is incapable of carrying out penetrating analysis with discerning wisdom. Once you master concentration, supranormal awareness and super-consciousness emerges naturally. My goal is to share with you the methods, obstacles, ways to clear them, deviations, aberrations, and various stages of this practice. If you are truly serious about becoming a great meditator, I strongly recommend that you reread all posts under Mental Transformation so far. Do not rush; take your time. This is the foundation. Even if you are sure that you have the messaging figured out, read them still. Once done, read the ones on concentration one more time. Unless you grasp the importance of those practices, you will find it hard to champion concentrative meditation.\
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\f4 \cf9 Contemplative Meditation\
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\f1 \cf2 After you have attained the ease of body and ability to settle your mind, anytime at will, anytime at your discretion, for however long you want, are you ready for contemplative meditation. When practicing meditation of this type, you will automatically gain remarkable insight into the true nature of things, the realities of different planes of existence and into many things beyond words. Super knowledge will sprout. There is a term used in meditation texts called acala vipashayana, insight devoid of mental activity.\
Monier Williams Sanskrit dictionary defines vipashaya as unfettering, or without a trace. And that is the key: when no trace of conditioned mind is left, when you gain an insight rising above your intellect, above all calculations, above logic, that is transcendental knowledge, true insight. It has come from within. It is not the product of some conditioning, cogitation or deliberation. This is the output of contemplative meditation. This is an advanced practice. I will shed some light on it in due course.\
Coming up next in the series\'85The actual practice of concentrative meditation.\
Stay tuned.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
\
Two Sets of Rules\
Mullah Nasruddin knocks on his neighbor\'92s door. He opens the door, greets Nasruddin and offers him a seat.\
The mullah says to him, \'93I have something to tell you. You are not going to like it but truth must be faced.\'94\uc0\u8232 The neighbor asks anxiously, \'93What is it?\'94\u8232 \'93Your bull attacked and badly wounded my cow. If it doesn\'92t get the treatment right away, it is likely to die,\'94 Nasruddin says, \'93I think it is only fair that you either pay for a new cow or get the injured one fully treated.\'94\u8232 \'93That is a load of rubbish, what nonsense is this!\'94 the neighbor says angrily, \'93how can you hold the owner responsible for what his animal did? It wasn\'92t me who attacked or injured your cow, so don\'92t ask me for any compensation.\'94\u8232 \'93Oh, I am sorry. In nervousness and frenzy, I made a mistake in presenting the facts. It was actually my bull that injured your cow,\'94 Nasruddin spurts out, \'93but I guess it really doesn\'92t matter whose bull or whose cow it was. They both are animals anyway. Besides, you have made yourself perfectly clear.\'94\
The neighbor had no reply.\
Often one wants perfection, justice, truth and a fair treatment from the loved ones, from life, from others, from everyone in fact. The question is do you give the same back? A knee-jerk reaction may be an affirmative one that yes you do. But do you really? Many people have two sets of rules, one, the convenient one, for themselves and the harder one, often idealistic, for others.\
Normally, the person they are facing, more often than not, also has two sets of rules. Such discrepancy is the breeding ground of conflict, frustration and disharmony. When your sets of rules are identical for yourself and others, half of your problems will disappear. Compassion is exercising leniency for others but keeping your own benchmark, the one you have for yourself, to the highest level. Problems eliminate themselves for the one who is compassionate.\
Sometimes undesirable spontaneous actions, however unintentional, can cause grief to others. Be that an incident of road rage, a fit of anger, a lie or anything that compromises your own identity. The same also holds true for others. They are just about as human as you are and as divine as anyone else. If you remember it, your thought process, your method of dealing with people will change; you will find yourself in greater harmony with them.\
I am tempted to quote Maya Angelou here, \'93I\'92ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.\'94\
Go on! make someone feel special. Be fair. Discard the scroll of rules you have for the world; use only one set, the same as yours. You will feel light and free.\
It may just be the perfect moment to spell out the ethic of reciprocity, a maxim shared by all religions of the world: \'93Do unto others what you want done to yourself.\'94\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Overcoming Negative Emotions and Thoughts\
One query I receive frequently from many is how to live in the moment. Seekers tell me they want to take their mind away from negative thoughts and emotions but are not always able to do so. In fact, more often than not such negativity or distractions win over them causing a turmoil in their inner world of peace and quiet. In the last post I talked about how an attempt to focus on what you dislike brings you exactly what you do not want. That is how Nature operates.\
Let me explain. Your outer world is greatly affected by the state of your inner world. Your thoughts, desires and emotions (ultimately, all thoughts) are the building blocks of your inner world. Whether the thought is to avoid something or to have it, that very thought becomes the building block. When you keep your thoughts on things or emotions you want to avoid, you can imagine what your inner world is going to look like. Here is how to overcome negative emotions, thoughts and distractions.\
Imagine a battle. The stronger side generally wins. The side that has greater force and more intelligence tends to overpower the other. Between a weak and a strong, the weaker gets subdued by the strong. That is all you need to know. When your negative emotions or thoughts are stronger than your positive ones, they will win over you. Till such time that you discover your natural state of mind, a state that rises above negative or positive, you need to list positive emotions.\
Think about those things and emotions that uplift you and are stronger than the ones that make you feel down and pensive. No matter how terrible things may be, there is still plenty everyone has to be grateful. Being grateful for what you have helps you to be positive and strong. Further down the line, when we get to Emotional Transformation, I will detail the practice of gratitude.\
For now, your task is to find enough fodder for your mind that makes it peaceful and happy. Whenever you feel down, do not make any attempts to stave off the negativity. Just try your utmost to focus on the positive. Consequently, negative thoughts become greatly feeble.\
All negative emotions and sentiments including anger, jealousy and greed mean you are hurt somewhere in your inner world. It indicates the wounds have not healed yet. It shows your heart is still scarred. There is no one-size-fits-all remedy, you need to find a way to heal yourself. Let go; forgive, try. If you make an attempt to let go of all that grieves you, healing occurs automatically. If you make an attempt to look upon everyone as merely the medium to deliver you, as I say, your parcels of karmic fruits, your outlook towards people will start to change. Follow the rules of giving for greater satisfaction and read up again on desires and dependency.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The Three Elephant\
In my exposition on the Yoga of Self Transformation, we covered a number of practices under Mental Transformation. Briefly, the practices are around silence, solitude, abandon, resolve, listening, concentration and gazing.Many people email me about the correct way of meditating and that they are unable to control their mind and meditate. We have reached a point where I will now start elaborating on the practice of meditation. If you make an attempt to carry out the aforesaid practices, you will gain a quantum leap in your ability to meditate. In this post, I would like to share with you a story, an anecdote if you will.\
An unhappy but rich woman, used to the superstitious ways of living, approached a sadhu once. The sadhu, however, was an average thinker in the garb of a sage. He could talk material matters with worldly people, so they felt a certain relief after talking to him. Sadhu thought since people offered him money and stuff, there was no harm in listening to them. That was his bread and butter, in fact. And people thought they will gain respite from sharing their problems with the sadhu. So, this woman goes to the sadhu with a long list of problems and complaints.\
Her problems seemed to have sprung out of nothing and her issues, petty. You can cure a disease or treat a patient, but how do you cure someone who is actually healthy? The woman was unhappy in spite of everything she had. She had good health, decent family, savings, a home, almost everything. The Sadhu thought there truly was nothing he could give the lady, certainly there was no panacea. But he did not want to return the lady empty handed either.\
After a long pause, he said to the lady, \'93I will give you a very powerful ancient talisman. This will solve all your problems. This must be kept a secret.\'94\
The woman concurs.\
He gives her a copper coin with a hole in it. He further asks her to bury it near the roots of the peepul tree on the full moon night.\
\'93But, for the talisman to work, there is a condition that must be fulfilled,\'94 he says.\uc0\u8232 \'93When you are burying the coin, you must not think of any white elephant with three legs, a lame monkey or a talking frog,\'94 he adds, \'93if you think of any of these even for a moment, the remedy will fail.\'94\
The woman offered sweets, gold and clothes to the sadhu and left happily. The full moon night was ten days away and she reminded herself everyday to not to think about the three legged elephant, lame monkey or the talking frog. On the night she was to use the talisman, the only thoughts that hit her mind were of the three prohibited things.\
Go figure.\
The talisman did not work and she had no one to blame. Had the sadhu not mentioned what not to think, it probably would have never even occurred to her to think of a white elephant with three legs or a talking frog. When you focus too much on what you do not want in your life or think about things that give you grief, you automatically attract those things in your life.\
This story tells you everything you need to know about meditation. When you lay emphasis on what you ought not to think or do while practicing meditation, you will feel uneasy, restless and distracted. To discover your mind\'92s natural and unmodulated state, another expression for samadhi, you need to learn to practice meditation with ease. Just gently focusing on the object of concentration and abandoning all intellectual examination will help you slip into that state of bliss.\
In the next post I will cover the two types of meditation and thereafter the four primary hurdles and the process of overcoming them.\
If you commit to meditating, who can stop you? If you choose to not listen to your mind, who else is talking?\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Shravana\
In my last post, I talked about the practice of concentration by way of focusing on an object. Those of you who have a very busy lifestyle, taking out even thirty minutes a day may be a little hard. Although, if you really set your mind to it, you can do it.\
In this post, I am going to elaborate on the practice of listening. The Sanskrit term is \uc0\u347 r\u257 va\u7751 a; it means to listen. The practice of listening is a simple and powerful way to build your concentration. Beyond listening as one of the methods in the nine systems of bhakti, I am surprised to see no direct mention of it any of the yogic texts. I can tell you from my first-hand experience, you will undergo a rapid transformation, a surge in your ability to concentrate if you can practice the art of listening.\
Listening requires that you be alert and attentive in the present moment. Being able to live in the present moment is the goal of meditation. A mind that lives in the present moment does not, naturally, brood over past or worry about future. If you can afford to not think about past or contemplate on future, you have achieved a pseudo-meditative state. When you also become aware of every single emerging moment, you have attained the meditative state. Let us say you are attending a lecture in some class on Marketing. If you are not paying attention to what the lecturer is saying, in other words not listening, your sitting in the class is anything but useful. To know what the teacher is saying, you have to listen, and in order to listen, you have to pay attention. That is concentration.\
The practice of listening, as I am giving it to you, is the easiest way of building one-pointed concentration. So, here it is:\
Practice this whenever you can, multiple times a day if possible. When you are driving or commuting, chances are you may have music turned on. Well, listen to the song. This is the practice in a nutshell. Put you favorite song on and make it a point to listen to every word in that song. It is not as easy as you think. How many times have you found yourself playing your favorite song with the intention to listen to it fully only to find a few minutes later the song is already finished? You probably put it on repeat to hear it again. Even with the most melodious song, it takes certain training for the mind to stay at it. You may listen to the whole of first stanza, parts of second stanza but somewhere in between the first and the last, your mind wanders off. You stand unaware.\
In practicing concentration through the act of listening, put on some music and listen to it. Bring its listening to the forefront of your mind. Avoid leaving it playing in the background; doing that will actually weaken and dilute your concentration. Just putting on music and not listening to it makes your mind used to living with noise. Many put their headphones on and start reading a book. If you ask them five hours later, chances are they are unable to recall the reading in detail or the songs they played. If you train your mind to live with diluted concentration, meditation, and subsequently tranquility, will become increasingly harder. You can forget all about a stable, settled or a tamed mind.\
In the olden days, when there were no headphones or portable music systems, people would put on music and the only act they would do was to listen to that music. While reading, they would only read. Multitasking, the mantra of today\'92s world plays havoc on your concentration. Once you learn to do single-tasking properly, doing many things at once will become easy and effective. If you think you can multitask, try juggling with three oranges.\
Concentration without meditation is pointless and meditation without concentration is useless.\
Peace.\
Swami\
\
Ten Vital Energies\
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\cf2 \cb10 In a couple of posts on this blog and elsewhere, I briefly mentioned about the ten vital energies. Today,\'a0I am going to share with you the yogic aspect of such energy flow in your body. The ten energies control all voluntary and involuntary physical actions, reactions and habits. The energies, in turn, can be controlled by\'a0
\i asana siddhi
\i0 , mastery of the yogic posture, regulation of the breath and concentrative meditation. The Sanskrit term is\'a0
\i v\uc0\u257 yu
\i0 . It means fluid, subtle energy. It is a term frequently used to mean wind as well. The ten vital energies are divided into five primary and five secondary energies. Their functions are as follows:\
\
1.\'a0
\i\b Prana\'a0vayu\'a0
\i0\b0 \'a0\'97 Vital life energy: This energy is the basis of your life. It is the vital life force in your breath, the subtle element in oxygen. Almost like fuel for your body. It has a direct impact on your state of mind, your emotions, moods and disposition.\
2.\'a0
\i\b Apana\'a0vayu\'a0
\i0\b0 \'a0\'97 Descending energy: Urine, seminal fluids and defecation is controlled by the descending energy. It predominantly lives below your stomach. Mastery over this\'a0
\i vayu\'a0
\i0 can give you control over urination, bowel movements and ejaculation.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 3.\'a0
\i\b Udana\'a0vayu\'a0
\i0\b0 \'a0\'97 Ascending energy: This energy lives in your throat and is responsible for producing voice. Thyroid glands can be controlled by the manipulation of ascending energy. Thyroid glands directly affect the growth of hormones.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 4.\'a0
\i\b Samana\'a0vayu\'a0
\i0\b0 \'a0\'97 Thermal energy: This energy resides in your stomach. It is responsible for movement of food and digestion. Control of this energy can help you change your body heat at will. Channelized thermal energy will give you an amazing colon and exceptional metabolism.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 5.\'a0
\i\b Vyana\'a0vayu\'a0
\i0\b0 \'a0\'97 Diffusive energy: This energy circulates through your whole body. It causes the blood to transport oxygen to all parts of the body. Manipulation of this energy can help you stay in one posture for as long as you want.\
The five secondary ones are noted below:\
1.\'a0
\i\b Naga
\i0\b0 : It controls belching, burping and all upwards wind movement from your stomach.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 2.\'a0
\i\b Kurma
\i0\b0 : It controls sneezing and all abnormal wind movement in the sinusitis.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 3.\'a0
\i\b Krkara
\i0\b0 : It controls the function of blinking of the eyes.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 4.\'a0
\i\b Devadatta
\i0\b0 : Yawning can be completely controlled by manipulation of this\'a0
\i vayu
\i0 .\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 5.\'a0
\i\b Dhananjaya
\i0\b0 : Twitching in any part of the body is affected by this energy.\
There are many yogic practices aimed at stilling the ten energies. Stillness of the ten energies infuses extraordinary calmness and will power in the practitioner. But most such yogic practices should be done under the supervision of a competent master. The practice of breath regulation, something I will touch upon when we get to Physical Transformation, channelizes the five primary energies and concentrative meditation stills the five secondary energies. You will experience inner peace and composure. You will find lot more in control of yourself.\
Correct body posture is paramount to allow free flow of these energies. I will elaborate on that in due course.\
From the next post in the series, I shall begin an exposition on the four primary hurdles in the practice of meditation\'a0and ways to overcome them.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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\cf2 \cb1 \
Why do People Change\
I care for you. Of course, I will always love you no matter what. Yes, we will definitely go for a vacation this year. I promise, I will be home by seven. I will never get mad at you again. And many other promises people make to each other, to their loved ones, to the ones they generally care about, such words that they mean and intend to keep unless they are lying through their teeth. Often though, many are unable to keep most of their promises. Does that mean they never meant it when they were making such big claims? Actually, not quite.\
One thing is constant in the world and that is change. This world is made up of living and non-living beings. The living change the non-living keeping the cycle of change in motion. So, in essence, people change; not necessarily for the better or worse always, they just change. And, when they change, promises they once meant, they may no longer feel that way anymore. If you accept it, your life will become easier. If you want to hold someone to ransom for the promise they once made, good luck!\
A couple were unhappy in their relationship. They go to their spiritual master for blessings and guidance. They narrate the state of affairs and request their guru to show them the path. He ponders over the matter for a minute and says, I will tell you to do two things. If you follow them religiously, harmony will be restored in your relationship. So:\
\'93First, always keep your promise no matter what.\'94 the guru said.\uc0\u8232 \'93Second, never make a promise no matter what.\'94 he finished.\
If you look around, the more intimate a relationship, the greater the chances for change that may lead to deterioration. That is how it works. The key is to give each other some personal space. There should be room for each other to move freely. Imagine doing ballet in Chandni Chowk Delhi, or playing soccer on Tottenham Court Road in London. Too packed! When your relationship gets crowded with expectations, it leaves no room for playing.\
It looks lucrative \'97 to change the other person; it even looks possible \'97 to make the other person adjust according to you. The truth is, it is too ambitious. Much easier is to change yourself, for your own happiness, for your own good, for your own peace of mind.\
I once read a beautiful quote somewhere, \'93Never make a decision when angry and never make a promise when happy.\'94 Golden words of wisdom.\
Be happy.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The Restlessness in Meditation\
The next four posts, this one including, are key to your success in meditating correctly. I am going to share with you the four common defects of meditation. I cannot overstate the importance of understanding the four hurdles and applying the correct methods to overcome them. Please take all the time you need to grasp, understand and absorb them if you really want to become an excellent meditator.\
In the last post I implored those who are serious about meditation to reread all the posts under building concentration but I know that none of you, not even one person, of the hundreds of regular readers, actually did it fully. I am at ease with that but would like you to know that there are no shortcuts. If you want to experience samadhi, that tranquil state, that oneness, it is not going to come without efforts. Unless you make meditation a priority, you are unlikely to feel motivated to persist. You can read as much as you like, you can roam around the whole world, you can hear words of wisdom to your heart\'92s content, you can be in the company of sages, anything external you can think of, that is not going to suffice for you to experience the exalted state. Ultimately, you have to do it yourself to taste the nectar.\
Before I expand on the present subject, let me reiterate the goal of meditation: it is settling your mind and letting it operate in its natural, primordial and unmodulated state.\
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\f4 \cf9 The usual scenario\
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\f1 \cf2 Your present state of mind is conditioned by many such factors as evolution, society, beliefs, desires, intellect, second-hand knowledge and so forth. Coming off this conditioning allows the meditator to discover mind\'92s true, original and pristine nature. As you sit down to meditate, after a few seconds, stray thoughts from all directions start to hit you. As you continue to try and build your concentration, you experience a certain degree of restlessness. It almost feels the more you try to stay away from your thoughts, the stronger they seem to come and get you making you restless. It is normal. Once you attain the transcendental meditative state, you no longer try, thereafter, you simply maintain your state.\
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\f4 \cf9 The foremost hurdle\
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\f1 \cf2 The first obstacle is restlessness. It may be in the form of anxiety, resentment, excitement or sensual stimuli. It is normal for all beginners, intermediate and advanced meditators; only the adepts are spared, that too by sheer virtue of their practice and experience. The difference between an adept and an aspirant is that the former is aware of the restlessness as soon as it arises and promptly uses the mental application to pacify his mind, whereas an aspirant allows such mental restlessness to overpower him destabilizing his otherwise settled mind.\
When you experience restlessness, and as it builds up, during your meditation, you may feel the uncontrollable urge to move, shift, talk, and or even end your session. Thoughts in the form of emotions, experiences, plans and analysis linked to past or future may make you anxious, excited or aroused. A lingering thought over some right or wrong action may cause resentment. All of these are thoughts and they will make you restless. During the practice of concentrative meditation, you must not engage in any cognitive activity of examining right or wrong, good or bad and so forth. Just remember, they are all thoughts and learn to drop them and rise above them for lucid sessions of good meditation. Do not be impatient when restlessness emerges. The cause is natural, and, the remedy, simple.\
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\f4 \cf9 Restless Mind: A grumpy toddler\
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\f1 \cf2 Let me use a simile to help you understand the cause of restlessness:\uc0\u8232 Imagine you are walking through a shopping mall. You have a three year old toddler with you. As he is happily holding your hand making you feel proud of his behavior and obedience, he spots a candy store with flashing signs, attractive display, animated cartoon characters and everything else he could possibly fancy. He wants to go to the store. You, however, have other plans and want him to simply be with you.\
He insists on going in the direction of the candy store, you tell him otherwise. His efforts intensify as does your grip on him. His volume gets louder, and, your stance, more commanding. He is unmoving and you are unyielding. He gets agitated, decides to lie down on the floor and starts throwing tantrums. At that point in time, you have four choices:\uc0\u8232 a. Let him throw tantrums while you feel somewhat embarrassed in the public,\u8232 b. try to pacify him with the promise of taking him there in the future,\u8232 c. take him to the candy store, and,\u8232 d. overpower him, lift him and rush to the parking lot.\u8232 It is not a desirable situation and none of the options seem to be pleasant. This is exactly what happens when your mind becomes restless. It starts to behave like the grumpy toddler. It tries all sorts of tricks to get its way.\
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\f4 \cf9 The cause\
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\f1 \cf2 When you are meditating and you try too hard to concentrate, your mind becomes restless. At that moment, it wants to break free of the obedience of posture, concentration and stability. Conditioned mind is not designed to operate according to you, it is strong enough to lead so that you follow what it wants. These are what tendencies of the mind are, they are all thoughts but they are the ones you find hard to let go. Restlessness is caused when you want to discover the natural by employing unnatural methods, when you want to curb rather than understand, when you aim to ignore rather than abandon, when you hold instead of letting go.\
Good meditation is about acceptance, awareness, attitude, and balance. This is the skill one needs to acquire\'97 achieving that balance and maintaining it all times. It is not just about sitting still for the sake of it, for, if it was, most animals would be great meditators; it is not about closing your eyes and pretending there are no thoughts, if this was meditation, all hibernators would be exceptional meditators. It is about maintaining a harmony, that natural state of your mind.\
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\f4 \cf9 The remedy\
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\f1 \cf2 The best way to overcome restlessness is to stop meditating at that moment. Stay in the posture if you can but make no attempts to concentrate. Hold a little self dialogue. Just relax. Stop all efforts to meditate. Take a deep breath. Get into a self communion on any subject matter you like, not the one that will arouse you but something that will give your mind a break from the act of concentration. If they fail to dissipate restlessness, just get up and take a break. Resume after some time. We have to distract the toddler till we pass the candy store.\
When your mind is tired, give it rest, when it is restless, pacify it. Pacify your mind. Talk to your mind. Give it a bait, do not be too hard for too long. We are teaching it discipline, we want it to move according to you. Be patient. Calm it down. Restlessness is normal and pacification is an art, a skill. Ever seen an expert dog trainer? A good trainer knows when to reward versus reprimand, when to leash versus let lose, when to be soft versus strong. Some may be naturally good at it, but the exceptional ones are often so on account of their practice, persistence and experience. Concentrative meditation is training the mind, when done, it automatically results in taming it.\
As you progress on the path of meditation, you will learn how to be so that the kid never gets to see the candy store at the first place, or the toy store, or the swings. If he does not spot those, he will continue to be a happy child all the while you shop (read meditate). That comes with practice, with learning, with perseverance. I will continue to share the practices and methods as we prod along. For now, learn to pacify your mind during the moments of restlessness as stated in the sections above.\
Can you imagine how empowered you are going to feel with a settled mind, a mind that has turned inward, the one that has learned to listen to you and not the other way around?\
No candies, no tantrums!\uc0\u8232 Peace.\u8232 Swami\
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The Art of Being Positive\
There was a man once. He was always positive. Whenever anything untoward happened, his response would be, \'93It might have been worse.\'94 So much so that it started annoying his friends. When one is always positive, it can get on the nerves of the average thinkers around.\
One day, a friend of his came up to him and said, \'93Last night I dreamed I was driving and that I had a terrible accident. And that every bone in my body was broken. They tried hard to revive me, the paramedics, but they failed. They gave me electric shocks but nothing worked. Ultimately, they pronounced me dead. The messengers of Death came and dragged me all the way to hell. There I was beaten badly and skinned while I felt excruciating pain. Then they took me and put me in oil heated to top degree. My body burned and I cried and cried but no one helped me. The pain was like never before. I was scared when I got up. And I am still scared now. This is a bad sign.\'94\
\'93Oh, well. Don\'92t be scared,\'94 the man said. \'93It might have been worse.\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93What do you mean, it might have been worse! How could it have been any worse?\'94 the friend exclaimed.\u8232 \'93It might have been true,\'94 he said calmly.\
It might have been true \'97 a statement worth reflecting on. Fear is innate in all living beings, such fear may be instinctive or conditioned, something I will elucidate in the near future. Fears stop one from being positive. They make you weak. If you take a look at your past, you will realize that less than one percent of your fears actually ever came true, and that too, not even fully. This is the key to remember. When you no longer feel positive about your actions or goals because you are afraid that life may just go jelly on you, remind yourself of all the times in the past when you felt the same but each time your fears proved wrong.\
While in high school, you probably looked upon your maths or science teacher as the supreme being, the one who controlled your destiny, but he did not and you still passed. Each semester or each year you were probably afraid of the exams, but you mostly passed, if not always.\
When companies were downsizing, and the economy was in depression, when the stock markets were going south, you might have been affected but you moved on. The Divine, the One who lives in all, ensured that you were not without food, shelter, clothing or medication.\
Being positive is a matter of mental preparedness. It is knowing that the world cannot end for you. It is remembering that every day gives you the opportunity to do something new. Everything is interdependent and relative. Positivity is about living in the moment. And above all, being positive is a matter of choice, a conscious choice in fact. You can be positive or you can be negative; in essence, both emotions have no firm basis; they are based on hope, often biased and misplaced.\
Whether or not you count the chickens before they are hatched is not as important as caring for the ones that do hatch. Because ultimately, your satisfaction, peace, joy is going to come from living in the moment. Past is dead, and, future, unknown. Gratitude, being grateful for what you have, hope, being optimistic about what you may have, and, discipline, working in the present to get what you would like to have, are the ingredients for a positive life. If you are grateful, hopeful and disciplined, you will feel positive naturally.\
If all your fears, or even majority, came to life in the past, you have reasons to be skeptical and negative about your future, about your goals, about yourself. However, if that is not the case, remember that it is your mind playing tricks. Being positive does not mean that you hide in a cocoon and hope that all good things will happen automatically, it is about working towards your goals regardless of what comes your way. You will emerge triumphant, stronger and a winner.\
Oscar Wilde once said, \'93All of us are in the gutter but some of us are looking at the stars.\'94\
Go on! Learn to play and play to win but win to enjoy. Do all that positively. Chase your dreams. Today, you have the chance.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
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Laziness in Meditation\
In the last post, I wrote about restlessness as the foremost hurdle in meditating correctly. As mentioned earlier there are four common flaws that prevent the meditator from experiencing oneness, that exalted state, the natural state of mind. When a meditator stays course ceaselessly working on crossing the four hurdles, such aspirant, experiences profound sensations and bliss before long.\
In this post, I shall elaborate on the second most common defect, that is, laziness. It is of two types. Let us say that you have decided to meditate for forty-five minutes every day. That is your resolution. The first type of laziness makes you want to skip your meditation. Your conscious mind gives you excuses because it does not enjoy being tamed, it wants to go its own way dragging you along. Purity of discipline is paramount in executing any plan, be it meditation or any other routine. The only way to encounter laziness of this type is to not listen to your mind. If you sit down and vow to meditate no matter what, your conscious mind will eventually understand that you are the master and that you have no plans of showing any lax when it comes to following your discipline.\
My present focus in this post is the laziness of second type, the one you encounter while meditating.\
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\f4 \cf9 The usual scenario\
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\f1 \cf2 As you sit down to meditate, motionless, still in one posture, you enjoy the first few minutes. In the beginning, you are aware of the restless nature of the conscious mind. You work hard to channelize your thoughts, you exert to concentrate, you try to stay focused. When you do that, you experience restlessness. Such restlessness may prompt you to move, engage in thoughts or abandon your session of meditation altogether. The best way to overcome such restlessness is to relax at that point in time. However, as you relax, you run the risk of losing sharpness of the mind. Such relaxation, if unchecked, can lead to inertness, inattentiveness, a kind of stupor, a torpid condition. If you are meditating by way of mental visualization for example, the image you were holding mentally dims and disappears. If you are meditating on a mantra, it becomes a superficial exercise of just mentally chanting the mantra and you are no longer hearing it, let alone becoming one with it. Basically, your meditation has lost its lucidity, its crispness and has now become a mostly useless activity of sitting still and nothing beyond that.\
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\f4 \cf9 Laziness: A grave flaw\
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\f1 \cf2 Attentiveness plays the most critical role in meditating correctly. Laziness during meditation can take the form of dullness of the mind or lethargy of the body. If your mind experiences dullness, a kind of sluggishness, the clarity of the object of meditation, the sensitivity of superconsciousness disappears. It is as good as sleeping. A session of meditation that is not clear, crisp and lucid, will not allow you to experience even a relaxed state of mind, much less its natural one. You will get up from your meditation feeling quasi relaxed, the type you feel after a nap. Often an overwhelming number of meditators mistake that for good meditation. Good meditation is not about putting your conscious mind to sleep, it is clearing it. Such clearing does bring bliss and sublime sensations with it. If a meditator gets into the habit of meditating incorrectly without actively working towards clearing the hurdles, it becomes extremely hard to get rid of such flaws later.\
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\f4 \cf9 Lazy Mind: A slow elephant\
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\f1 \cf2 A lazy mind in various meditational, yogic and tantric texts has been compared to the slow moving elephant. The hurdle of dullness is as big as the elephant. It is for this reason that many meditational deities are shown holding a goad, the weapon used to prod an elephant. The esoteric meaning behind such implement is to always hold the goad of attentiveness, of alertness to control the elephant of sluggishness. Just like an animal as large as elephant, when in front of you, can obstruct your vision, laziness of the mind obstructs your path of bliss and oneness. Think of the hibernating python or the one in deep slumber. It is still, calm but that does not equate to meditation. If you are lazy or restless, however still you may be sitting, such meditation is a misnomer. A meditation full of flaws is like a pot full of holes; just like the latter is unable to carry water, the former is unable to retain bliss.\
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\f4 \cf9 The cause\
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\f1 \cf2 Imagine you are trying to move a big rock. You keep exerting your force. It is only natural that after a while you are going to feel exhausted and tired. Exactly the same thing happens with your mind. When you try hard to concentrate, and keep doing so even when you feel restless, there comes a time when you feel worn out and tired. If you are not attentive at that time, you will slip into stupor right that very moment. Such dullness compromises your meditation. In every likelihood, presuming you are physically fit, you will experience restlessness before feeling lazy. If you can take corrective measures at the time of restlessness, it becomes relatively easy to overcome laziness. Like an athlete who gradually builds his endurance, his physical strength raising his pain barrier, a good meditator steadily increases the duration of his meditation. At the peak of my own meditation practice, I used to meditate for a straight stretch of ten hours. It was not easy, but the results were astounding. I did not start sitting ten hours from day one, in fact, I started with multiple one hour sessions gradually increasing them over the course of many years. Correct posture is absolutely critical; I will cover that when we get to Physical Transformation.\
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\f4 \cf9 The remedy\
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\f1 \cf2 The moment you realize you are losing sharpness of your meditation, you need to exert, mentally that is. You must refresh your concentration. You need to remind yourself to focus. If your laziness has resulted from physical exhaustion, you need to stop meditating. That can happen, if your meditation sessions are longer than ninety minutes each. Under such circumstances, you should take a break, get up and inhale some fresh air, drink a little bit of water, walk around a bit and then resume your session. However, if you experience dullness as a result of mental exhaustion, something that can happen even after the first twenty minutes of your meditation, you must not get up and break your session. You should try to visualize bright light, or focus on the enchanting aspects of your object of meditation while staying in the same posture. You need to refresh and energize yourself without getting up or ending your meditation. Focus your attention elsewhere for the time being but do not engage in thoughts that are not linked to your meditation. As you feel fresh again, relax and resume your original meditation. You need not exert any longer. Because if you keep exerting, you will feel restless.\
Balance is crucial. When you feel restless, relax; and, when you feel lazy, exert, concentrate. These two repeatedly interfere with your meditation. They almost take turns. You need attentiveness to identify and correct both flaws. Hold short but lucid sessions and gradually increase the duration. Learn to meditate flawlessly for short periods first. When you learn to harness laziness and check restlessness, you are very close to experiencing cosmic oneness. I never said it was easy. Remember that analogy of\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/03/ekagrata-the-practice-of-concentration.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 rope-walking}}?\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The Art of Discipline\
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\cf2 \cb10 If we were to pinpoint one common denominator in the lives of the greatest across the globe, the finest who walked on our planet, the most charismatic leaders, the greatest thinkers, philosophers, inventors, it would probably boil down to discipline. They all lived a life of discipline, great self-discipline in fact. Discipline is the art of staying course, of sticking to a plan, of taming your mind. It is a skill.\
Often people tell me that I want to do this or do that, I really want to lose weight, I so want to quit smoking or drinking, I want to study hard, I want to meditate, I want to look for a better job and so on. I smile and I get somewhat amused when I see them talk like that. The only thing I hear is \'93want\'94. Of course, you want. Wanting is the nice part, it is the easy part. There is nothing special about it. A dog wants love, most want money, all want respect, some want care, others, companionship, and, many want everything. Somewhere along the line, if you are serious about fulfilling your dreams, you have to bridge the gap between your wants and actions. If your desires and your actions are not matching pace, your wants are simply dreams; there is very little chance of seeing them materialize one day. If you set your mind to action, even the wildest dreams can come to fruition.\
Paradoxically, discipline sets you free. It gives you the freedom to do anything, to accomplish anything, to be anything you want. To the one who is disciplined, knowledge, wisdom, success, solutions come automatically. Einstein once said, \'93It\'92s not that I am so smart. It\'92s just that I stay with problems longer.\'94 Discipline is about persistence with conviction. When you carry on with what you have to do, whether or not you like it, that is discipline. If you find ways to be positive and like it, following any discipline becomes easier.\
You want to lose weight but you hate the thought of exercising and you love desserts; well, exercising is not something you have to like or dislike, eating right is not something you have to love or hate. You just have to get on with it and do it. Conscious mind is like the spoilt child. They may act obstinately or exhibit misdemeanor in the presence of their own parents. But the same kid, when he goes for a sleepover at his friend\'92s place for instance, will behave sweetly and nicely. He knows that no one is going to tolerate his whimsical behavior there. The same goes for your own mind\'97 if you stop putting up with its misconduct, it starts behaving. Disciplining your own mind is your personal problem and you alone can do it.\
You get up in the morning, get ready, go to work and spend your entire day there, regardless of your prejudice or preference, irrespective of your level of motivation; you just do it because you know you need to do it. Your mind may not like it but it does not complain beyond a certain degree. It knows you are giving it no choice. The same goes for everything else. When you want to get something done, you just have to get on with it. With discipline, as you start to see results, you feel more motivated, enthusiastic and positive.\
No matter how negative you are, even if you are hopeless of succeeding, if you follow the discipline, you will see success. There are no two ways about it.\
I am reminded of an apt quote by Aristotle: Men are anxious to improve their circumstances but are unwilling to improve themselves.\
Whenever you feel lazy, want to get rid of something, or, wish to have a better future, you need to contemplate on what it is that you have to do to achieve that and then pursue it relentlessly. Your present circumstances are a product of your karma, desires, emotions and beliefs, often misbeliefs. To transform yourself, either you can work on all of them, or the root of them all, that is, your mind, your thoughts.\
Just like success, discipline is highly addictive.\
Oh, and I should mention that by discipline I only mean self-discipline. Just in case you started making plans of disciplining others.\
Come on! get on with what you have to do. Let not your preferences come in the way of your actions. Stop day-dreaming or complaining. If you cannot build your own destiny, no one can do it for you.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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Stray Thoughts in Meditation\
There are four primary hurdles, the pitfalls one has to constantly watch out for quality meditation and noticeable results. I elucidated the hurdles of restlessness and laziness in the previous posts. Today, I am going to shed light on the third hurdle: stray thoughts. Meditation is your ability to stabilize your mind on one thought, on your chosen thought, eventually becoming one with it. Such oneness gives birth to superconsciousness and superknowledge. It only comes with intense effort and supreme one-pointed concentration.\
If you put in the quality effort, all else follows. Thoughts are inseparable from the mind just like heat from fire. The act of concentration requires you to make a conscious and exerting effort to focus on the desired thought. The art of meditation is to be able to hold that thought with perfect ease, without any undue exertion, with a sharp and still mind free of dullness and stupor. An adept is able to hold his session of meditation for as long as they want whereas an aspirant is able to meditate under favorable circumstances only, such as, pleasant surroundings, calm mind, no major stress, good physical health and so forth. The one who is still learning the art of meditation gets easily overpowered by stray thoughts. Causing ripples in the quiescence of your mind, they act like rocks thrown in still water.\
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\f4 \cf9 The usual scenario\
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\f1 \cf2 Like the physical world outside, your inner world is interdependent and interconnected. For an instance: in the outside world, if there is no fuel, your car fails to move, if there is no road, there is no where to drive your car, if there is no energy, there is no way to run the fuel refineries, if there are no vehicles, there are no methods to transport the fuel and so on. Everything is interdependent. No independent phenomenon exists in the outside material world. However exhaustive you may examine, you will get to the same conclusion. One thing links to another.\
This is exactly the case with your inner world of thoughts too. While meditating, if you fail to check the very first thought, be prepared to be bogged down by thousands more. Let us say during meditation, you feel thirsty. Naturally, you think water, from water maybe an instance of buying bottled water, the shop, swiping the credit card, from credit card your mind may jump to an incident when you purchased gasoline with it, that may remind you of gas prices, cost of living, your scarce resources, how you could or should have saved in the past, from savings, you may jump to future planning and on and on and on and on and on and on\'85Suddenly, you feel loss of focus, energy, and concentration. Had you got back to your object of meditation the moment you first thought of water, you would be saved from all the rest. That is how simple it is, or is it?\
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\f4 \cf9 Stray Thoughts: A natural hurdle\
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\f1 \cf2 The natural state of mind is like the quiet, expansive sea. Thoughts are like waves. They can be tidal at times. Restlessness can be compared to a sea storm. Laziness is like the floating ship that has its engines shut down and is simply going in the direction of the wind. Just like sea is not sea without waves, mind is not mind without thoughts. There is no mind without thoughts. Something worth remembering. Thoughts are a product of the conditioned mind. Meditation is about rising above the conditioned mind to regain its natural and original state. It is a sublime experience. Of all the hurdles in meditation, having thoughts is the most natural one. Since it is the result of millions of years of evolution, it is so ingrained, inbuilt, it is the hardest to overcome. It can be done with right practice.\
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\f4 \cf9 The cause\
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\f1 \cf2 This is one hurdle you need not hold yourself responsible for. The cause is evolution. Conditioned mind\'92s natural tendency is to engage in thoughts. Anytime you pay attention, you will find yourself in thinking mode. During your meditation, as you become increasingly attentive getting past restlessness and sluggishness, your are met with the hurdle of thoughts. This is a catch twenty-two situation. Thoughts cause restlessness and when unchecked, they also make you dull and tired compromising your meditation.\
As you continue to strike the balance between relaxation and exertion during your meditation, however, you start to gain control over your thought flow. They keep pouring though. You need not feel bad. This is natural. Thoughts have no intrinsic value or power. So long as you have an awareness, you will have thoughts. With great practice, you are able to replace all your thoughts with the only thought you are meditating on. You may well be meditating on no-thought, on emptiness. Unwanted thoughts equate to hurdles and loitering. And! all thoughts are unwanted when you are meditating; saving of course, the one you are meditating on.\
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\f4 \cf9 The remedy\
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\f1 \cf2 Do not react at any thought. Simply, just drop it and get back to your point of meditation. Treat all thoughts with equal indifference. Do not examine or place any importance on any thought. There is a Sanskrit word frequently used in many tantric, yogic and meditational texts\'97smriti; it means memory or mindfulness. Only a vigilant mind can detect the emergence of a new thought. The key is to drop the thought as soon as it emerges. As you continue to practice your meditation with mindfulness and vigilance, thoughts not only become feeble but they almost stop emerging after a certain point. In that supreme quietude, when you continue your meditation with awareness, you inevitably experience transcendental bliss.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Are you Happy or UnHappy\
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\cf2 \cb10 Human life is like a pendulum. It is dangling and tossing between the positive and the negative, good and bad, right and wrong, the true and the false, highs and lows, thick and thin, and a whole heap of other dualities. All that is subjective, however. It cannot affect you unless you let it. Let me narrate a little story to you:\
There was a monk once. For years he practiced meditation, contemplation and forbearance, yet he could not gain enlightenment. He still felt troubled by the world around him, especially when people failed to see his saintliness or disagreed with him what he thought was the truth. He still felt bad when people mistreated him, and, good, when he was treated well. He wanted to rise above, remain indifferent to such worldly offerings but he could not.\
One day he approached his guru and confessed his inner turmoil and restlessness. His master listened patiently and gave him a key and directions to a certain room.\
\'93Go and meditate there for three days unmoving. Leave the door open and maintain silence. The truth will dawn on you,\'94 the master instructed.\
He obeyed his guru and went to the place to meditate. Much to his dismay, it was in a market, next to a busy hallway, in the center of a crowded city. He was skeptical about meditating in a noisy place for inner quietude. Nevertheless, he proceeded. As soon as he unlocked the door, a nauseating stench greeted him. He soon realized that there was a toilet just above the room. For a moment he felt crossed with his guru. Then again, the guru must have a reason he thought.\
The room was unclean, without any windows, and looked like an abandoned shop. There was seepage on the walls and the ground was somewhat wet. The waste pipe above was leaking. He assumed lotus position and sat down to meditate. Every so often, he could hear the sound of flushing toilet. He understood that he was meditating directly below a public toilet. His restlessness only built up more.\
A million worries engulfed him. He was concerned what if the pipe above him burst, what all people, who were passing by, talked about him, how would he know that seventy two hours had passed, what if he fainted from the stench, what if he someone came and interrupted his meditation mid-way and so on.\
On the third day, while he was engrossed in such thoughts, the plumbing above him burst and fecal matter fell on his head. Before he could determine his next step, two men walked by.\
\'93Who is this man?\'94 one asked in disgust seeing the monk smeared in excreta.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93God knows! Some claim he is a holy man while many say he is a shithead.\'94\
The monk was enlightened as soon as he heard that. He understood that the whole world can only have one of the two opinions about him and everyone is bound to have some opinion. In essence, none of the opinions actually matter unless you let them. They cannot affect you or bother you, unless you accept them. They cannot multiply unless you respond to them. Such opinions are not eternal unless you react towards them. They hold no intrinsic meaning unless you contemplate on them. They cannot change you unless you cultivate them.\
Everyone who knows you is going to have an opinion about you. A lot many who have no clue about you are likely to have an even stronger opinion about you. Those who meet you form one based on their experience. And many who have never met you, form theirs based on others\'92. Such is the nature of this material world. The biggest democracies, religions, sects, cults run on this principle. Every one has the right to have an opinion. And you have the right to accept, reject, or ignore it. It is your choice that affects your state of happiness.\
If you start listening to yourself, when your inner voice finds an audience in you, the outer ones matter less and less. When, how you are seen by others stops bothering you, a blanket of peace drapes, almost shields, you. And the one who is peaceful is happy indeed. Happiness is the outcome of your actions, physical or mental.\
Know when, what, and where to keep versus let go. Such knowledge comes with practice, with awareness. It is about attitude and outlook. This is the journey of turning inward.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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Speaking the Language of Love\
Interestingly, the harmony in most human relationships, certainly the social and personal ones, depends on one simple element. It is not about material gifts or even fulfilling needs. You can wreck someone\'92s world or bring the best out of that person, you can motivate them or entirely kill their self-esteem with this. How you are perceived largely depends on this. It is not about how you look or what all you have. From the greatest to the simplest are often tied to this. Can you guess? I am talking about your speech. The words you pick and the style you choose to deliver them can make all the difference. They determine whether you are loved or hated, accepted or rejected, cared or closeted, shared or shunned.\
Your speech can trigger profound emotions not just in humans but in any living creature. The only difference is you may occasionally deceive humans with your false speech, speaking words you never meant, but animals sense your sincerity. When you speak sincere words, kindly and sweetly, the inner you starts to glow, you experience peace. Your relationships automatically improve and you increasingly find yourself surrounded by those who care about you. Primarily because your speech and words can make them feel good, make them feel important, make them feel human, even divine.\
Vedic texts categorize all emotions into fundamentally two types, positive and negative. When you trigger a positive emotion in someone, you get a favorable response. Such response strengthens both you and them, it builds your bond; love grows naturally as a result.\
The other day, someone, a man in his fifties, visited me from a far off place. It took him three days to reach the ashram. A simple villager from a distant state, he heard from someone about this place and said he could not resist the temptation to come and see me. I met him and he was elated and tears of joy coursed down his cheeks. This was our first meeting. He narrated a story to me that day. As follows:\
About thirty years ago, a prominent baba, saint, was visiting a nearby village for a week. Devotees were expected to visit in large numbers so a stage with tents and all was setup. Community fire offerings to the deities and sermons were scheduled. So, this person and his friend got on their tractor. Both were farmers and this was the only vehicle they had other than bicycles. The place was a little too far for paddling so they chose tractor instead. It was a very hot day, as if sun had descended right on earth. After navigating through the traffic, driving on paved and unpaved roads, tiring ninety minutes and several kilometers later, they reached their destination.\
It was already midday. Their lips had gone dry and their bodies were singed from the excessive heat. They were longing for water. There was no sign of any water. But, in their hearts, they were happy that soon they would be seeing the saint. They went to the meeting room. A young monk was there, perhaps a disciple of the godman. He seemed to have no connection with anything divine; nothing about him gave the impression that he had anything to do with self-realization or God. Nevertheless, he was robed in saffron, so these guys showed due respect and asked him if they could meet the saint.\
\'93Wait here and I\'92ll go and inform Baba,\'94 replied he in a cold and indifferent tone.\uc0\u8232 \'93Where can we have some water?\'94 this man asked hoping to be pointed to a nearby water source.\u8232 \'93Water? It\'92s on the other side of the ground. But what if Baba comes now and you are not here. Have it later after his darshan, meeting,\'94 he said completely ignoring their sweaty faces and dehydrated looks.\
They sat down and waited. They kept licking their lips but there was no more saliva forming in their mouths. They really needed water. But, they were here to quench their inner thirst they thought. It was not till half an hour later that \'93Baba\'94 came. They prostrated before him and sought his blessings. The saint asked them all sorts of questions about their domicile, demographics, land ownership, which tractor they drove and the rest of it.\
\'93Baba, how come there\'92s no one here? It\'92s supposed to be such a big program!\'94 this man uttered out of complete innocence.\uc0\u8232 \'93You think everyone is as stupid and dumb as you to travel in this heat? Are they all idle and redundant like you to come in the middle of the day?\'94 Baba replied in a frustrated and angry tone.\
Pin drop silence ensued. All questions about God, all spiritual desires, all madness about self-realization fled their very beings. They looked at each other, bowed before Baba and left promptly.\
They got back on their tractor, did not bother to drink water and left that place as quickly as they could. They did not talk even among themselves. They felt hurt and ridiculed. On the way was a lemonade stall, under a tree. They stopped their tractor and got down. It was thirty years ago and living was not so cruelly expensive. The vendor was selling a glass for ten paise (0.002 cents) for plain water with lemon and twenty-five paise (0.005 cents) for lemonade made with ice, sugar, mint, salt and black pepper. They gulped down three glasses each of the latter type. They rested under the shade for half an hour and had another glass of lemonade each. They paid their dues and the vendor smiled. Everyone felt complete. The seller even helped them to restart their tractor which had to be done manually by pulling a cable in one swift jerky movement, like the old-style lawn mowers.\
They did not visit another \'93saint\'94 for many years after that. Verbal offerings of Baba killed their spiritual curiosity.\
I grinned, giggled, chuckled, smiled and laughed while I was hearing his story. More at his simplicity and the manner in which he narrated the whole thing; it was situational.\
He said, \'93Only if Baba had uttered some words of love or care, we would have pledged our lives to him.\'94\
He stayed in the ashram for a few days and left peacefully.\
His story highlights something profound: before all knowledge, possessions, labels and attainments comes the emotion of love. There are only two ways to express love: with words, and gestures. Generalization aside, everyone is tied to the language. You use words and gestures of love with them and they become yours.\
Buddhist texts further expand positive and negative emotions into eight types, four in each category. And four out of those eight depend solely on your speech, articulation, choice of words. I was aiming to cover this in this post but will do so in the next one now.\
If you can speak softly, without raising your volume, you can settle even the most violent disagreements, you can get your point across in practically no time. Regardless of how serious, important, grave or complicated the matter, all that is required to speak kindly is mindfulness, a gentle reminder to yourself about how you want to behave. If you decide to practice restraint and kindness of speech, you will experience and spread bliss. You may have nothing material to offer, you surely have words to choose from though. Pick them carefully. Life\'92s greatest pleasures are in the smallest things, in priceless simple gestures, in sincere words. Express yourself in the kindest possible manner.\
Go on! Tell someone today how important they are to you.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The Eight World Emotions\
Once upon a time in a certain village lived a prominent trader. He was wealthy, famous, honorable and a man of repute. He was restless and worried still. He could not shed his fears, of failure, of losing, of unknown.\
He approached his spiritual master and pleaded, \'93With your grace I have everything yet I am always afraid and worried. Please give me wisdom so that I may be peaceful under all circumstances, no matter what.\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93So, you want to be peaceful under all circumstances?\'94 the guru confirmed.\u8232 \'93Yes, your holiness.\'94\
The guru grabbed a piece of sacred bhojapatra, the bark of birch tree, dipped his pen in ink made from vermilion and scribbled something. He let it dry for a few minutes while he looked at his disciple in the most compassionate way.\
The guru folded the charm and gave it to him. \'93Here, always keep this with you. Open this only when you feel your worst fear has come true.\'94\
The trader prostrated before his master and went back. A terrible drought hit that region two years later and his financial situation went into tatters. He had no stock to sell, debtors were unable to pay their dues and creditors started chasing him for theirs. They dragged him to court, made him sell his house, mortgage his wife\'92s jewellery and had his warehouses pawned. He pleaded and he prayed but nothing worked.\
His master had already left for seclusive meditation on forbidden peaks. It was time to read his guru\'92s inscription, he thought.\
He unfolded it to see the contents; it read, \'93Stay firm, stay course. This will pass.\'94\
The words had magical effect on him. He decided to not lose hope. He realized that things could not stay like this forever, that it was temporary. And temporary it surely was as the following three years saw heavy monsoons and bumper crop. He bounced back. Wealth and honor came back in his life. He was overjoyed. His guru was back too. He promptly made arrangements to see his master with offerings of all sorts.\
Prostrating before the guru, he said, \'93With your grace, I\'92m so happy. Business\'92s never been this good.\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93Do you have the bhojapatra with you?\'94 the guru asked calmly. \'93Open it and read again what it says.\'94\
He obeyed and the words on it reminded him that even this phase was temporary. Just like the bad times, even this would pass. From joy and excitement, his state of mind shifted to bliss and peace.\
\'93This is eternal wisdom, my son,\'94 the master added. \'93Stay even. It\'92s all cyclical.\'94\
The scope of human living is limited to positive and negative emotions. Such is the nature of duality. As promised in my last post, today I bring to you the eight worldly emotions as documented in various Buddhist texts. They are segregated into two categories, namely, positive and negative. In addition, Bhagavad Gita places a great deal of emphasis on attaining a state of evenness amid all dualities. It is the foundation, the essential element for living in the exalted state.\
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\f4 \cf9 The Four Positive Emotions\
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\f1 \cf2 When a positive emotion is triggered, you feel happy, good, important, motivated and strong. You feel like you can take on the whole world. You are the same you, but something within you changes when you experience a positive emotion. The four facets of such emotions are to be pleased by:\uc0\u8232 
\b Pleasure:
\b0 \'a0All sense gratification, everything you do and experience through your body for joy, falls under this category.\uc0\u8232 
\b Praise:
\b0 \'a0If you or your work gets recognition or appreciation, you naturally feel good.\uc0\u8232 
\b Gain:
\b0 \'a0When you believe you have made a gain, material or otherwise. It could range from winning a lottery ticket to killing a mosquito; one may boost your bank account, and, the other, your ego or simply satisfaction.\uc0\u8232 
\b Delightful words:
\b0 \'a0Someone offers you a compliment, it spontaneously triggers a positive emotion, especially if you feel it is a genuine compliment.\
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\f4 \cf9 The Four Negative Emotions\
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\f1 \cf2 The four negative ones are the exact opposite of above. They make you feel low, pensive, crippled and weak. They are triggered when you feel perturbed by displeasure, criticism, loss, and dreadful words.\
All emotions are temporary though. It is when you do not know how to come out of an emotional state that such emotions take the form of fears, addictions, obsessions and diseases, both physical and mental. And emotions are subjective. What is positive for you may be negative for the other person. For example, your material gain of buying could be someone else\'92s loss of selling, your pleasure of hunting could be an animal\'92s displeasure of getting hurt. The same words may sound delightful or dreadful depending on the source.\
In a way, it is inevitable, inescapable\'97living in the positives and negatives. However, it is not necessary to let these emotions affect you beyond a certain degree. When you are going through a good phase, enjoy it with the memory that it is not going to last forever. When the going is tough, live it gracefully knowing this is not going to last forever either. This is rising above duality, being even. This is turning inward in a nutshell. Good or bad, if you have done it once, you can do it again. If success cannot move you, how can failure ever; if acceptance does not affect you, how can rejection! Live like the lotus, in the world but above it.\
Go on! Be fearless. Only that what you let can affect you.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Images: Fourth Hurdle of Meditation\
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\cf2 \cb10 Over twenty weeks ago, we started our journey on understanding the Yoga of Self Transformation. I wrote that self transformation comprises of transforming oneself at four levels, namely, mental, emotional, moral, and physical. Without purification, understanding and transformation at all four levels, it is simply just not possible to attain the exalted state. I started with my writings on Mental Transformation. We went through various exercises to strengthen your concentration, resolve and knowledge. Of the four primary hurdles, we have already covered three. Today, as I finish my exposition on mental transformation, I bring to you the fourth common defect in meditation.\
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\f4 \cf9 The usual scenario\
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\f1 \cf2 Let us say you sit down to meditate with resolve and attentiveness. After a while you start to feel restless, you feel the urge to move or to end your session. A little while after you check restlessness by calming your mind, a sort of lethargy, dullness blankets you. Many people erroneously term it relaxation or a good meditative experience; a grave error. Good meditators, however, staying alert, apply mental exertion with attentiveness to overcome this hurdle. As you progress with a mind that is neither dull nor restless, the natural tendency to engage in thoughts spring up. Soon, you find yourself either pursuing a thought or actively engaging in it.\
For example, you may recall a conversation, an unpleasant one. Forgetting that you are doing meditation, you start to mentally pursue that conversation, you start to think you should have said this or said that, or, you should have responded in such and such manner, how the person was ungrateful, shallow, rude, wrong and so on. Great meditators do not lose sight of their thought of meditation. They are able to simply drop the thought immediately putting a plug to the conversation. Now, they are not restless, or dull, or pursuing thoughts but this does not mean they are meditating flawlessly. There is one more distraction you have to watch out for.\
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\f4 \cf9 A subtle but strong defect\
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\f1 \cf2 In a way, this is the greatest hurdle. It is innate, a natural fabric of conditioned mind. It does not leave you even when you are sleeping, causing dreams. As you cross the three hurdles and try to meditate, you will experience various images flashing in front of you from your past. They may seem unrelated. As you try to focus on your object of meditation, you find yourself battling with appearances, images stored in your memory. During your meditation you may have pictures of gadgets, cars, houses, buildings, ice-creams, food, people, creatures, anything for that matter, flashing in your mind. You are not engaging in any thought, you are not pursuing any mental conversation but you keep getting hit with these. They severely impede your ability to meditate correctly.\
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\f4 \cf9 Images: The flowing wind\
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\f1 \cf2 In any place, even if empty of all existence, there always exists air. Further, there is always movement in the air, however inert that may be. So, in a way, wind is omnipresent. Only a vacuum maybe devoid of such phenomenon. A vacuum though is an artificial construct, it is not a natural state. Similarly, even when a mind is empty of all thoughts, restlessness and sluggishness, there still exists memory. In fact, it is the basis of your analytical skills and your intelligence. You may be a Nobel laureate in physics, or a genius in calculus, in an unconscious state, in the absence of memory, however, you are unable to count even up to three. Does it not seem natural then, with intense meditation, as you gain new mental territory and cleanse your psychic imprints, you gain superknowledge and superconsciousness?\
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\f4 \cf9 The cause\
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\f1 \cf2 Your memory is the source of all imagery. Anything you see or hear even once, always stays in your memory. Whether it is a giant ship or a needle sinking in the sea, it retains both. Always and forever. Just like creating a vacuum artificially, you can use methods to suppress such imagery, but they remain temporary measures. How can attainment of your natural and permanent state be dependent on anything artificial and temporary! In my opinion, it is not possible to erase your memory. It is possible to cleanse it though; to the degree that the image flashing in front of you fails to trigger any thought or emotion. Such cleansing is possible with emotional and moral transformation; I will cover them in due course. Only when you allow your inner wounds to heal can you remain unaffected at the appearance of any image in front of you.\
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\f4 \cf9 The remedy\
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\f1 \cf2 So, what do you do when you are in a windy area? You cannot battle or win against the wind. All you can do is to cover yourself, to not face the wind, to accept it. In much the same manner, there is no need to react to the images. You simply cover yourself with a balance of alertness and relaxation, exertion and pacification. Soon, images start disappearing. As you continue to meditate, intentionally recalling only the object of visualization each time, other images start to fade away automatically. Further, as you cleanse your psychic imprints, you recall less and less of disturbing, enticing or exciting images. Their impact becomes negligible and their recollection, faint. You are well on your way to experience lucid meditation thereafter.\
This finishes my treatise on Mental Transformation. Coming up next, a brand new world for you, an original piece of work \'97 Emotional Transformation.\
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\i \cf11 My obeisance and gratitude to my Ishta, my foremost Guru, for allowing this transmission.
\i0 \cf2 \
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\cf2 Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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\cf2 \cb1 \
Emotional Transformation\
In the past few months, on the path of self transformation, we have already covered the important aspects of mental transformation. I will now elucidate emotional transformation for you. My goal is to cover it in a series of articles in the next eight to ten weeks.\
Even though I am starting my exposition henceforth, I have already written a fair bit on emotions. In particular on positive and negative emotions, on being positive, on loving, and overcoming negative emotions. If you have not already gone through them, I encourage you to read up on them, especially the eight worldly emotions. Without further ado, let us delve in:\
All reactions to everything in life spring from your emotions. Generally, thoughts you do not abandon take the form of emotions or desires. If you do not abandon the thought of disliking someone, it is likely to turn into an emotion of hatred, for instance. However, emotions are not just thoughts unabandoned. They are more profound than that, deeper than just plain arithmetic of discarding or keeping thoughts. Whenever your conditioned mind experiences anything, good or bad, it leaves a psychic imprint.\
Yogic texts call it\'a0
\i citta vriti
\i0 . They continue to accrue and pile up over several lifetimes. Such psychic imprints keep getting stocked in a giant storehouse, your mind. Almost like the sedimentation process, you form psychic sediments, hardened imprints. They are hard to get rid of. But, it can be done. And that is exactly my focus as part of emotional transformation: to allow you to see your emotional side, understand its cause, work on its cleansing, leading to complete emotional transformation.\
Unlike units of thoughts, emotions are not absolute. They are relative. Since their primary nature is non-absolute, they can be championed with mindfulness and practice. Often, one has a reason to feel good or bad, happy or sad, kind or cruel and so forth. Such reasons are merely excuses. There is no justification for letting a certain emotion, any emotion, overpower you. As you cleanse yourself stilling your mind, washing off your imprints, you start to experience a state of evenness regardless of what all is going around you. You begin to understand the relative and interdependent nature of the material world.\
A man approached Einstein once and said, \'93I can\'92t understand all these technical terms and the scientific thesis behind your theory of relativity. Can you explain it to me in simple words?\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93When you are enjoying a nice dinner with a beautiful woman sitting across you, two hours pass as if two minutes,\'94 quipped Einstein, \'93and, if you are sitting on a hot plate, two minutes feel like two hours. That\'92s relativity.\'94\
Chuckle. This theory applies ditto to emotions too. It is all relative. Self-delusion may lead you to believe that your emotional state is dependent on what all you have or lack. Your true nature though, your transcendental emotional state is free of all relativity and dependent phenomena. When you start to believe that having certain things will make you happy, you weaken yourself emotionally. As soon as you do those things, you already have a list of other things you think you ought to have to feel happy. You keep ticking off the list and the list keeps on growing. It becomes an endless quest: finding happiness or feeling good.\
If your emotional state is dependent on many things, you can well imagine a lack of emotional stability. For, each time any of those things go missing, it will disturb your emotional balance. The journey of turning inward is realizing your true nature so you may rise above the worldly emotions. It does not mean that you no longer enjoy the world, but that you learn to discard any emotion at will, anytime you so wish. You begin to understand the relative nature of everything around you. Your true nature, which is absolute, is not dependent on anything relative. Seeing the relativity and rising above it is self-realization.\
Twenty year old son of Mulla Nasrudin, the famous Sufi character, once asked, \'93Father, is a ton of coal too much?\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93It depends, son,\'94 replied Mulla, \'93on whether you are shoveling it or buying it.\'94\
The world will continue to be relative, but you have a choice of gaining your absolute ground while living in the material world. Such ground will give you enough room to design your own world however you wish it. And as an added bonus, anyone who comes in your contact will bask in bliss.\
In the next post, I will document an important practice for emotional transformation.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Be Grateful\
A few years ago, before I renounced, there was a cold wave in North India. Several incidents of homeless people dying from the cold were reported in the news. My father asked and inspired me to do my two cents worth. Consequently, a senior manager in my company who was also a close friend of mine and I decided to distribute blankets to the needy. However, we did not want to just give them away to some organization. We wanted to ensure that they directly got in the hands of those who were in genuine need. We bought about fifteen dozen blankets and we had an SUV that could stock more than seventy at a time. My friend, his sister, our driver and I got in the vehicle at midnight. We started driving around the high streets of a major city, an industrial town.\
The outside temperature, as indicated in the car, was three degrees centigrade. The street lights had a halo of fog around them as it was foggy, not dense though. Even the stray dogs and the cows were hiding. It was all painfully quiet and cold. As we drove around, we saw heart wrenching scenes. There were homeless people lying on the footpaths at different places. Some had wrapped themselves in jute bags, some in flattened cardboard boxes, quite a few were draped in newspapers. The repertoire included the aged, the young, men and women, children, toddlers and infants. Not even one was sleeping with their legs fully stretched, all were lying curled up to protect body heat. All four of us in the car had heating on, but we were feeling guilty and shocked. We had seen things like that earlier, it was the first time, however, we paid close attention.\
We stepped out of the car and woke some people up to give them new blankets. Some were ecstatic, some cried, some thought we were the police who came to remove them from sleeping at a public place, some thought it was a joke, few were drunk and could not get up, some wanted more than one blanket. No one asked us for money or other things. They seemed very contented to get a blanket.\
Their clothes were soiled and tattered, their hair unruly and mostly matted, their bodies dark and smudged in dirt, years of suffering and sweat had permanently settled on their bodies, but, their eyes had an expression of peace and acceptance. Further, they all bore smiles of gratitude and contentment as they got their blankets. Some immediately unwrapped the blanket and donned it. It was gratifying beyond words to see them do that. Some made it their pillow, they either did not want to use it right away because it was new or they might even sell in the gray market the following day. That was beside the point. We did our karma we thought.\
There was one particular scene beyond bear. Some people came running towards our car as they saw from a distance that we were giving blankets. In that group was a girl, she was physically handicapped. She tried to rush like the rest fearing the car might leave or we might run out of blankets. While she was trying to run, she stumbled and fell down. We almost cried seeing her state. As she got up and came closer, she seemed to be mentally challenged as well. We could not endure the scene. We did our part and quickly got going. I never went out again to distribute blankets as I did not have the heart to see such suffering. My friend and his sister gave away the remaining on another night.\
We came home and as I lay my head on the pillow, snuggled up in my quilt, I was looking up at the roof. It was a furnished room, it was heated, it had an attached washroom, everything to make it comfortable. It all seemed like a dream. \'93Wow! I have a roof over my head,\'94 I thought, \'93what good karma must have I done to deserve this.\'94 Those people kept flashing in front of my eyes. I could not help but think that not having roof was one thing but what about all the other needs? Where must they go to attend nature\'92s call, they had no place to cook, nowhere to store their utensils or stove, no place to even keep the blankets in fact, they had no place to wash their clothes, where would they generally go to get drinking water, did they brush their teeth, or could they even afford to do that, they had no place called home, there was no where they could go after a tiring day, that and a million other questions boggled and tired my mind out.\
I thought how little one needs to be grateful. That, how gratitude is not dependent on the magnitude of materiality, it is not dependent on what all you must have, but simply a state of mind, an expression of the heart, a commitment to tolerance, a resolution to be happy, a feeling of peace, a sense of contentment, an emotion of fulfillment.\
If you believe that in order to be grateful you must have certain things in your life, you will always find it hard to be thankful because no matter how much you may have, there will still be just as much more you will want to have. Work towards what gives you joy but be grateful for all that you have.\
When you are grateful, an invisible blanket of peace covers you, it makes you glow, makes you happy, makes you strong, makes you warm.\
On the path of emotional transformation, the first and foremost emotion is gratitude. Like all other habits, this can be learned, practiced, cultivated, nurtured. In my next post, I will bring to you the actual practice of gratitude.\
Today happens to be Mother\'92s day as well in certain parts of the world; go on! tell your mother how grateful you are for all that she has done for you.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The Practice of Gratitude\
In the last post, I wrote about how gratitude can make you strong. Today, I will share with you the practice of gratitude, the two types of gratitude, and what all you can do to be grateful. Let me reiterate: gratitude is one of the most profound emotions. If you are grateful you become loving, blissful, peaceful and calm automatically. Remaining calm or being at peace, to be able to love anyone and everyone are the natural outcomes of a grateful soul.\
In a way, gratitude is not just about being thankful, it is about being gracefully thankful with tolerance, with acceptance and contentment. As part of your emotional transformation, so that you become a stronger, better and a happier person, I cannot stress enough the importance of gratitude. You can be appreciative with your actions, words, and thoughts. The first two directly benefit others. Before we get to the actual practice, let me expand on the two types of gratitude, both are not mutually exclusive and many noble ones practice both. As follows:\
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\f4 \cf9 Being grateful to God\
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\f1 \cf2 Some people are grateful to God, to the Supreme Soul, to someone they feel is up there. It can give them a huge psychological boost, help them survive difficult phases in life, give them the motivation to stay course among numerous other benefits. Those who believe in the existence of God, regardless of the religion they follow, have someone they can be grateful to. Even daily prayer is a form of gratitude. Being grateful to God is not complete gratitude, however. Imagine being thankful to the mother but being careless, indifferent or irresponsible towards her children. It is of little use. Far more important than being grateful to God is to be grateful to his children, his creation. This leads to the gratitude of second type.\
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\f4 \cf9 Being grateful to others\
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\f1 \cf2 Love and gratitude are soul mates; happiness and harmony are their offsprings. It is not possible to be grateful unless you accept that someone has done something for you. If you feel, out of ego or ignorance, that it was your right, you will fail to feel grateful. Consequently, you will not experience any happiness, much less peace and bliss. Any relationship with gratitude present in it is bound to flourish. Practice gratitude and I promise you will experience the dawning of a transformation within you, keep at it, and you will amaze yourself before long. Gratitude is not always about grand gestures, it may range from a sincere thank you to an act of extraordinary compassion. Let me spell out the practice for you.\
You need to make two lists to effectively carry out the practice:\uc0\u8232 
\b List 1.
\b0 \'a0To God: Make a list of things you are grateful for. Examples may include health, shelter, clothes, food, family, opportunities or anything else that matters to you. Your list should have line items stating I am grateful for abc, Thank you God for xyz and so on and so forth.\uc0\u8232 
\b List 2.
\b0 \'a0To others: List all the people who matter to you, people who have made a difference to you, those who made an impact on your life. They could be your other half, parents, teachers, friends, colleagues, or even those who you may not have met but those who inspired you.\
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\f4 \cf9 The actual practice\
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\f1 \cf2 Do the following for an initial period of forty days and then adopt it and make it part of you, your life:\uc0\u8232 1. Read out your first list of everyday in the morning and before going to bed every night.\u8232 2. For the next forty days, express your gratitude to at least one person on the second list every day. It could be a simple email across thanking them genuinely, a phone call, a little gesture of treating them to a cup of coffee, sending flowers across or anything else you can do to express yourself. During the period of practice, you must make someone feel special everyday with your gesture of gratitude, be that in words or actions.\u8232 3. Mark a simple yes or no journal entry or a detailed one every night ticking that you did not falter. If you miss it any day, reset the counter and start again.\
That is it. Simple. Feel free to add to your lists as you prod along. The important thing to remember is that you must consciously express your gratitude without any expectations for reciprocation. It is hard but doable. True gratitude makes one generous, compassionate and infinitely loving.\
Try this practice to judge its effectiveness for yourself. You will gain incredible emotional strength. If you are emotionally strong, you can succeed at anything, anything at all. Gratitude makes you emotionally pure, such purity allows you to love unconditionally.\
Both diamonds and coal are found in the same mine. They both are the purest forms of carbon, albeit with different molecular structure. However, A diamond is not treated as coal. Whether you want to be burnt in a furnace till you lose your existence or be studded in a wedding ring marking commitment to love, it is a matter of choice, of attitude, of mindset, of perspective.\
If you pay attention, there is plenty to be grateful. Be happy, be thankful. I hope you know how lucky you are.\
Go on! tell someone how much they mean to you.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Restoring Harmony in Relationship\
The setting was elementary school. The Maths teacher approached a student famous for his love for mangoes.\
He looked at the young child and said, \'93If I give you an apple, and then another apple, followed by one more, how many apples will you have?\'94\uc0\u8232 The child started to count on the tip of his fingers, stared in the empty space for a few seconds, looked up to exchange glance with the tall teacher and replied thoughtfully, \'93Four.\'94\
The teacher was appalled. It was a simple question. He knew the child was capable of giving the right answer. He meant well.\
So, he repeated his question, \'93Listen carefully son, if I give you one apple, and one more after that, and yet another one thereafter, how many apples will you have?\'94\uc0\u8232 The young student followed the same process as before, stared in the empty space for a little longer this time and replied with a voice withdrawn but just as confident, \'93Sir, Four.\'94\
The teacher got angry. But soon he remembered child\'92s love for mangoes. He thought of a method to better draw his attention.\
He modified his question and said, \'93Okay, answer this one. If I give you a mango, one more mango and then one more. How many mangoes will you have?\'94\uc0\u8232 An innocent smile surfaced on child\'92s face for he was reminded of mangoes. His little thumb hopped on the tips of his pink fingers as he calculated, raising his eyes to look at his teacher, he said, \'93Three.\'94\
The teacher was happy. He clearly understood that it was child\'92s concentration that was lacking. Now that he had his attention, he decided to get correct answer to the original question.\
With much hope he uttered, \'93Pay attention now. I want you to give me the right answer. If I give you an apple followed by one more and then another one, how many apples will you have?\'94\uc0\u8232 The child imitated his thought process and gestures like before and mumbled, \'93Four.\'94\
The teacher got really mad. He started shouting at the kid, \'93How can you be so dumb? Why can\'92t you pay attention? I am asking you a simple question. If I am giving you mangoes they are three but how is it that you keep replying four for apples?\'94\
The child trembled at the shouting, his face turned red and two tears left his pair of eyes in an isolated fashion, only two.\
\'93Tell me! How can apples be four when mangoes are three? Are you trying to fool me?\'94 The teacher repeated his madness without lowering his voice.\uc0\u8232 The child looked down. He had lost the courage to look up or smile. He said softly, \'93That\'92s because mommy gave me an apple for lunch today. I already have one apple with me.\'94\
The teacher promptly realized the gap in understanding, the difference in perspective. He could have sought the clarification without getting fried. It was all a little too late, however. The damage to child\'92s mind was already done.\
This little story underscores the basis of all differences of opinions, all arguments. It is not always necessary that there can only be one truth. More often than not, there can be two, three, many or multiple truths, all such paths that lead to the same destination. No matter from which direction you draw a radius, it will always originate from or lead you to the center of the circle.\
Rather than believing your viewpoint to be the only right perspective, you may want to just spend some time understanding other\'92s. It is the fundamental ingredient in a harmonious relationship. The damage once done with words or gestures can never be undone. It may heal, but only so over a long period of time. I once read somewhere, \'93Put your mind in gear before you move your mouth.\'94\
An opinion is rarely a simple matter. Behind the formation of an opinion, several subtle and prominent forces are in play. One\'92s upbringing, experiences, exposure, circumstances, habits, tendencies, proclivities, environment and situation contribute towards their forming any opinion. Give other person the freedom to have a right to their opinion while you maintain yours.\
A man approached me a few days ago and said that he did not believe in God or even in the concept of God. And that, was he to feel bad? Was there anything wrong with it?\
I told him if his belief made him a stronger, better, happier, kinder, more compassionate human being, it was a good belief. That, I would rather have a non-believer with a kind heart than a believer with a cruel one.\
Truth has never been an absolute entity. There is a child in everyone.\
On a lighter note, the other day a family came to the ashram. A mother with a toddler and a young daughter. There were other devotees present there.\
One of them said to the naughty fellow, \'93What will you be when you grow up?\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93I will be Papa,\'94 said he. Everyone laughed.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The Art of Tolerance\
The great Marathi sage, Sant Eknath was not just any saint, he was perfection incarnate. His actions matched his words, there were no gaps there. In fact, it is this trait\'97 practicing what is preached, that sets a true saint apart from a mere preacher. Eknath was famous for his virtuous life, for righteous conduct, for devotion to his guru, and specifically for his tolerance. No one had ever seen him get angry. No matter what, he never lost his composure.\
Every morning, the sage used to go to the river Godavari for morning ablutions. A certain man in the village, who lived on the way to the river, took it upon him to prove that no one was beyond anger. That, no one could be eternally or infinitely tolerant. He claimed that he could get on Eknath\'92s nerves forcing him to lose his calm and shout at him. Like majority in the world, he had nothing to gain from this, he just wanted to prove his point, glorifying both his ego and ignorance.\
One day, as Eknath passed his house, he unleashed a flurry of abusive words at him. Eknath showed absolutely no reaction and kept moving. He dared Eknath to stop and listen to him. The sage stopped that very moment, turned his face towards the man, and stood there with a soft smile. The man used every swear word with all permutations and combinations he knew. He grew increasingly frustrated at his inability to evoke any reaction and stomped back into his house in a fit of rage. Eknath proceeded to the river.\
The following morning, he tried the same gimmick without success. He was even more determined and better prepared this time. Eknath did not react as usual. While he was returning back from the river, the man was ready and waiting with a bucket full of dirty water and kitchen waste. No sooner did he see Eknath than he emptied the whole bucket in one ugly splash on the saint. Scrambles of solid waste from leftover food remained mostly stuck to his robe, as if grappling for foothold, while muddy water soaked his white robe. The sage dabbed his eyes with the dry corner of his robe and walked back to the river without uttering a word. The man was not giving up anytime soon though.\
Eknath returned and he got a similar treatment one more time. Once again, without showing any reaction, he gracefully went back to the river for another bath. It went on like this for the next six hours. Eighteen times the man drenched the saint in dirty water, eighteen times he paled his snow white robe, eighteen times he tried to challenge, tried to win, to throw the sage off balance, but, each time he failed more miserably than before.\
Nineteenth time, however, he had a different plan. The weak, the ignoble person in him had left him already. This time he filled his bucket with flowers and threw at the saint. Eknath\'92s smile widened only slightly. The man fell at his feet, tears rolled down as if pouring out from some buckets and not ducts, and he begged for forgiveness. Something within him changed. The sage, with his superior behavior, with his virtuous conduct, with the strength of his tolerance outdid the challenger, changing him for the better, forever.\
He asked the sage how come he did not react, how did he put up with his misdemeanor, how could he be so tolerant?\
\'93Tolerant?\'94 spoke Eknath, \'93you did what you wanted. I did what I wanted. You exercised your choice and I exercised mine. Besides, I thank you; for, eighteen times today I got the opportunity to perform my ablutions. It is the holiest day of my life.\'94\
Tolerance is not about holding back, it is about not holding at the first place. It is not about getting back, it is about getting on. Tolerance is another expression for love. Because love is not always about what you do to others, it is a great deal about what you let others do to you. Tolerance and peace are directly proportional to each other. Merely curbing your response is not tolerance. It is more than that. In the next post, I\'92ll bring to you the practice of tolerance. Like gratitude, tolerance can help you experience eternal peace.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Practice of Tolerance\
I briefly talked about the art of tolerance earlier. Today, I shall elucidate the actual practice of tolerance. You can adopt it to transform yourself emotionally. The one who is not emotionally burdened finds it easy to remain in a state of bliss and peace.\
Let me reiterate the underlying philosophy. There exist only two types of emotions in this world, positive and negative. The positive ones make you feel stronger, better, happier and the negative ones, exactly the opposite. Emotions reveal your unmasked nature, not necessarily to others, but to yourself. For as long as one has thoughts, one will have emotions. The goal is not to lose your emotional side, it is but to be able to choose, at will, your desired positive emotion. As you continue to gain inner strength, ultimately, you learn to transcend emotional reactions firmly situating yourself in love and bliss.\
With careful practice, it is possible to watch your emotions, to better understand them, to channelize them, to transform them, to discard the negative ones. It does not mean that you will never feel bad again or feel hurt ever, it simply means such emotions will not last any longer than a few moments. There is something profound you should know about emotions, both positive and negative. The longer you hold on to them, the greater their impact. Imagine a hot plate. If you merely touch it for a moment, there may only be a tingling sensation. However, if you grab hold of it, it will burn and may even leave an indelible mark. Similarly, if you hold onto undesirable emotions, they may cause damage beyond repair. Of course, if you hold onto the positive ones, they will make you invincible.\
The practice of tolerance is one amazing practice. Being tolerant becomes easier if you practice gratitude and positiveness as well. So, here is the practice:\
1. Pick a time frame to begin with, say forty days, or a shorter period if you wish.\uc0\u8232 2. Write a reminder for yourself about practicing tolerance and read it at least twice a day.\u8232 3. Vow that no matter what as soon as you realize a negative emotion emerging, you are going to make every attempt to drop that emotion. Remember, at their core, emotions, like desires, are simply unabandoned thoughts.\u8232 4. Promise yourself that you will not return abuse with abuse, violence with violence, hatred with hatred, or any other negative emotion with a negative one.\u8232 5. As part of your emotional transformation, while practicing tolerance, you will not react and try your utmost to maintain your state of evenness.\
You can repeat the practice till it becomes your habit.\
Remind yourself to be tolerant without expectations. It is hard but doable. If you expect a kinder, better treatment because of your tolerance, it will make the practice much harder. Primarily because the other person may not even notice. In fact, your tolerance may be mistaken for your incompetence, inability, cowardice or anything else. At that time, you must remember that their opinions are mere reflection of their very own selves.\
It happened to me recently. Someone asked me a question I did not wish to answer because I felt it was merely intellectual and I have never been a fan of holding long conversations on abstract topics. I believe in practice. Another person concluded something else from it and shared his views. I wrote back saying that he had the right to his opinion. My response did not please him and he wrote more. I still did not want to answer so I narrated a story. He found the story pointless and wrote more. I replied saying I exercised a conscious choice. And this is the key: it is a matter of choice. It did not mean that this was a bad person, in fact, he was a knowledgeable and a noble man. His intentions were right as were his questions. His conclusions were a product of his own experiences and intellectual framework. However, I decided to stick to my choice.\
In the beginning others\'92 responses will affect you, but as you continue with resolve, with positive attitude, with determined awareness, it will matter less and less. Some will just not leave you alone. At that moment, exercise your choice. A little incident out of our lovely Sufi character\'92s life:\
Mulla\'92s wife was mad at him and was shouting at the top of her voice. But the husband showed no reaction. He sat there in a corner and remained silent. She got even more angry and said all sorts of things to elicit some response. Mulla would not utter a word.\uc0\u8232 Feeling helpless and frustrated, she said, \'93Listen, I have told you a billion times that don\'92t argue with me when I am fried.\'94\u8232 \'93I haven\'92t uttered a word!\'94 Mulla murmured.\u8232 \'93Yes, but you are listening very aggressively.\'94\
The real test is when the other person decides to keep at you, that is the moment, the period of keeping your calm. Give others the freedom to choose their emotions, while you maintain yours. Carry out the practice with resolve and you will love the new you.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
How to Deal Criticism\
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\cf2 \cb10 It is inevitable; criticism. It is always an opinion of the other person. If you agree with their judgement, their criticism may prompt you to improve yourself. However, if you disagree, you may be embracing negativity. Negative emotions weaken you. Sometimes, it can be hard to deal with criticism, especially if it comes from your loved ones. When others try to unload their negativity and opinions onto you, at that moment, you have a choice, an option to reject, to discard, to let go. If you can let go, you will remain peaceful; your heart will not be wounded, certainly not as much. Let me share a story with you:\
There was a certain monastery in Japan. It was founded by a Chinese master long time ago. The master and his followers were known for destroying religious texts and other such artifacts as Buddha\'92s statues and religious symbols. Their rationale was to free themselves from any form of conditioning and attachment. They believed that such symbols and texts conditioned and shackled the mind rather than freeing it. Radical methods of the Chinese masters helped many gain the transcendental state. However, those who disagreed with their methods criticized them heavily.\
Once, two seekers, well educated, one even being a professor, from North America, visited that monastery. They were fairly well read and had preconceived notions about the place and its founder. The abbot received them and took them around for a tour of the monastery. Towards the end of the tour, the Roshi, elder master, led them into a ceremonial hall to pay respects to a statue of the founder by prostrating and offering incense. The two seekers were disturbed as they had read all about the founder and his radical acts. Although disconcerted, they followed quietly.\
When the Roshi bowed before the statue, the professor could no longer contain himself and blurted out, \'93This man you idolize, he burned and spat on Buddha statues! Why do you bow before him?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93If you want to spit, you spit,\'94 replied the Roshi calmly, \'93I prefer to bow.\'94\
There you go. Whether you spit or bow is your choice, and whether they bow or spit is their choice. You exercise yours and let them exercise theirs. I am reminded of a quote, \'93Those who love you don\'92t need an explanation, and those who don\'92t are not going to believe one anyway.\'94 When you are offered criticism, you may choose to clarify your position, only if you truly wish to do that. You may wish to reflect on it, for, such criticism may even be true. Beyond that, do not cause yourself grief by brooding over others\'92 thoughts and opinions. Reject it. Promptly.\
Your freedom, inner bliss, is entirely in your own hands. It is your own state of mind. What you do not accept can never affect you. Just like you, everyone has a right to their opinion. Till you rise above criticism, you must discover your own method to deal with it. Here are some of the popular ones for you:\
1.\'a0
\b Remove yourself physically
\b0 : If you can remove yourself physically, you will no longer hear their opinions. If you are unable to hear what they are able to say, you will not be grieved. You may choose to go out or go for a walk.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 2.\'a0
\b Disappear mentally
\b0 : If you can find something else to focus on, so that you are listening to your inner music, you will retain your blissful state. It is like listening to your iPod while the other person is watching TV. They are doing what they like and you are doing what you like.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 3.\'a0
\b Visualize
\b0 : Choose a visualization that may help you. When someone decides to turn on their FM channel, you may see them as a blabbering child, a radio, or anything else that insulates you.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 4.\'a0
\b Sympathize
\b0 : If you pay attention you will discover that those who criticize you are full of their own insecurities. Those in bliss and peace do not criticize. They may politely offer their point of view, but you will not see them criticize. Next time when you are faced with criticism, fill your heart with empathy towards the other person. They might have had a rough childhood or an unfulfilling life. This is the only way they have learned to protect and express themselves. The method of sympathizing is the most compassionate way. If you can practice this, not only will you experience great peace, you will trigger a subtle transformation in the other person too.\
Just like upon boarding a plane your destiny is in the hands of the pilot, when you take the flight of an argument, it is no longer about you alone. If you choose to react or respond to criticism in kind, you have just procreated a new entity of disharmony and negativity, you have already boarded at that time. The control is less and less in your hands. You may unnaturally curb other person\'92s response if you exercise greater authority, but the damage is already done.\
How about when you are criticizing? If you are not kind enough, big enough to appreciate what the other person is doing for you, do not be so small to criticize either. There is a difference between helping someone improve and being downright negative about what they are doing. If you do not understand their point of view, it does not mean they are wrong. Be fair. Remember the two sets of rules?\
Yes, you want to make a point. Yes, you really believe the other person is at fault. Surely, you know what all they can do to improve. There is no doubt in your mind that you are impartial and your statements, genuine. The truth is, the other person feels exactly the same about herself.\
It is all in you, not all about you!\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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\cf2 \cb1 \
Emotional Healing\
\
Life is an aggregate of ceaselessly unfolding sequential moments, a potpourri of experiences, a medley of the tendencies of mind, proclivities, an unmodified collection of psychic imprints, that have been traveling with you, over lifetimes, making you who you are. Often people sincerely vow to do something, to form a habit, to carry out a plan, to meditate, to exercise, but somewhere between their resolve and actual execution, they lose motivation and action. They want to be disciplined, they even try hard to break their patterns, yet they often end up doing the reverse of what they sincerely wished. Does that mean they were not serious at the first place? Were their goals a little too ambitious? Actually, not quite.\
Today, I bring to you a vital piece of information. It will greatly help you towards emotional transformation. Let us say you carried out the practices of silence, resolve, solitude, concentration for your mental transformation, you further started practicing gratitude and tolerance elevating your emotional state to steady and blissful. However, there are memories that still bother you, incidents you cannot get over, people you cannot forgive, things you cannot forget and so forth. You want to forgive, to forget, to move on, to get over, yet something deep rooted in you, perhaps the pain, the anguish, stops you from being yourself, being happy.\
On your journey of emotional transformation, I am going to share with you the practice of emotional healing. If you can heal yourself of most, if not all, major untoward happenings in your life, you will experience a blissful state without even going through the rigors of meditation. In this post, let me introduce you to the thesis; the next one will detail the actual practice.\
There was a guy called Bo. A high level executive, in his mid forties, working for a large organization, Bo had a happy family with a loving wife and two kids. However, he was often battered by episodes of shooting pain in his right knee and wild mood swings. He was physically fit, all medical reports were fine. Nothing could explain his knee-ache. As for the mood swings, they happened even when he was on a vacation, when there was no stress of work. To make matters worse, he experienced it more in a public setting. When in such state, Bo often said things that hurt his wife and damaged their relationship. He would later apologize but the impact of apology almost vanished, for, the pattern of verbal bashing and subsequent apologizing seemed intertwined and constant.\
They tried many things without success. One lucky day, they came across a genuine healer. He advised them to recall and narrate the major incidents of his life, especially those where he experienced grief and pain, physical or mental. A few hours later, they had figured out the cause of his sudden appearance of physical pain and mood swings. It turned out that Bo was bullied in school. One particular time, a bully gave him a nasty blow on his right knee with a baseball bat. The blow did not break his knee but he cried out loud in excruciating pain. His wailing and howling immediately got the attention of many and he was promptly given medical aid. The bully was expelled from the school and no one ever pestered him thereafter.\
However, that experience had found a permanent home in Bo\'92s mind. Whenever he passed through the markets, if he saw a baseball bat or even any memorabilia linked to that sport, he experienced pain in the knee. It all happened in the subconscious mind; he was unaware. Shouting became his coping mechanism. His mood swings were triggered at the sighting of anything linked to baseball, especially the bat.\
Whatever you experience in life, everything you do or go through, leaves an imprint, a psychic imprint on you. These imprints conjure up your thoughts, chart your tendencies, your habits, your nature and almost everything about you. There are many ways to wipe the undesirable imprints. There is a yogic method and there is an intellectual one. I will share both in the next post. Stay tuned.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Emotional Healing - Erasing Psychic Imprints\
As promised earlier, I am elucidating for you the practice of erasing psychic imprints. Emotions are stored in the form of images and words. Even in the case of people going through physical abuse, the physical wounds may heal over time but it is mind\'92s uncanny ability to store and recall thoughts in the form of images and words that causes the greatest grief. In your quiet moments, when you recall painful incidents, you naturally feel indisposed. The more you try to forget them, the heavier they become, the faster you try to run away from them, the quicker they get to you. At that moment, even the most promising methods rarely work. There is natural healing and there is conscious healing. Natural healing can take a long time, sometimes, never. The practice of emotional healing, of erasing your imprints of images and words, is a deliberate effort, it falls under conscious healing. The greater your effort the better and quicker the healing.\
Feeling depressed, angry, constrained, down, pensive and so forth are merely the symptoms of an emotionally wounded person. Like I said once, it means you are still hurt somewhere within, the pain is still there. You may have simply denied it. That is not going to help beyond a certain point. It is not worthwhile to fight the symptoms. Go to the root to heal yourself. Others, those who you look up to, those who are genuine healers, may be able to trigger the healing process, they may be able to pin point it for you, but ultimately, your healing needs to occur within, it comes from your own efforts. It is like someone may get you the job, but it is your performance alone that will get you the pay. Without further ado, let me share with you the two finest methods of emotional healing.\
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\f4 \cf9 The yogic method\
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\f1 \cf2 This is the more difficult but permanent method. It can heal you beyond just the incident in focus. The success in all yogic methods depends on the aspirant\'92s ability to sit still, to concentrate and visualize. Maintaining one posture stills the primary energies, concentration stills the five secondary energies and readies your mind and visualization is the actual healing. The longer you are able to hold onto your visualization during your session of meditation, the quicker the healing. Visualization is like performing surgery; the patient (mind) needs to be perfectly still (posture) while the surgeon (you) concentrates and does the procedure (visualization). Here are the steps:\
1. Posture: Sit still with your back straight. Preferably crossed legged but any other comfortable posture will do just fine for this practice.\uc0\u8232 2. Close your eyes.\u8232 3. Breath: Do deep breathing, just normal deep breathing, for a few minutes. Discriminating faculties of the conscious mind will become somewhat passive as a result.\u8232 4. Recall a person or an incident that caused you great grief in the past. Your mind will automatically pick up all related emotions and thoughts. Try to stay on that one person or incident though.\u8232 5. Visualization: Imagine releasing soft white light from your heart chakra in the form of compassion and forgiveness. Anahata cakra known as the heart chakra is a psychoneurotic plexus situated near your heart, in the center of your chest, the vertical middle point between your throat and navel, between the two nipples. If you experience guilt because you did something wrong, visualize forgiving yourself. If you feel you are at fault for what you had to go through, forgive yourself still.\
You will travel through a whole plethora of emotions as you do this practice. Bring back your attention and focus on the calming white light. Visualize yourself being infused with it. Do not hesitate from engaging in self-dialog; your focus, however, should not be to binge and brood over but to erase and eradicate the imprint. It is not about right or wrong, it is just about forgiving for your own good. Clean the whole canvas of images. Repaint it with your favorite scene. Imagine yourself in bliss and smiling, envision living your dream, being happy, being healthy.\uc0\u8232 6. Take a few deep breaths again and slowly open your eyes.\u8232 7. If you believe in God, say your favorite prayer, or simply express your gratitude for all that you have been blessed with.\
One session should last for a minimum of fifteen minutes. Be consistent Do not expect results in the first session. Once you do it enough number of times, around thirty, you will experience a miracle: after a while you will find that recalling that incident or person no longer aggravates or irritates you. On the contrary, you will experience peace upon such recollection. You have successfully transformed, metamorphosed your emotion. It is a beautiful feeling, an empowering one. Most yogic methods requires an average of twenty eight days of daily practice before they show any results. It takes usually six months before an aspirant starts to perfect the practice. Once you are able to practice intense visualization, you can accomplish just about anything you can imagine. Subsequent healing sessions accomplish much more, much quicker.\
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\f4 \cf9 The intellectual method\
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\f1 \cf2 Think about what happens when a child gets a new toy. He is fascinated. The more he gets to play with it, the quicker such attractions starts to whither away. He gets over the toy. Earlier he would even sleep with it, talk to it, play with it, now, the toy is dead. Its sighting does not trigger any emotion in the child. Similarly as much as naturally, albeit ironically, when you experience abuse, rejection, failure, deceit, lies, pain, your mind gets a new toy. The more you try to avoid it, the stronger the attraction. Here is an easy way to get over those emotions. To carry out this practice effectively, you either need a mirror or a dictaphone. The steps:\uc0\u8232 1. Start looking into the mirror or turn on the dictaphone.\u8232 2. Recall a negative or a painful incident from your past.\u8232 3. Start narrating it verbally, either by talking to the mirror or recording in your dictaphone.\u8232 4. Try to recall every minute detail around the incident. For example, let us assume, someone you deeply loved broke up with you. The time, manner, demeanor and the news itself was most unexpected. Years have passed but you have not got over it. As part of this exercise, recall that incident. Do that boldly. Think of the color of the walls, what did you eat prior to being given that news, what all you were wearing, what was going through your mind, how did the other person look, what artifacts were there in the room, what were the surroundings. Recall all those and speak them out.\u8232 5. You will experience pain and hurt. You may experience an emotional outpour. Be bold. Do it multiple times over a number of sessions. Play with this toy. After fifteen to twenty sessions, the impact will simply disappear. Forever.\u8232 6. You can later listen to your own recording. As you do, you will recall even greater detail. Over a period, as you do your sessions, the whole incident, the person, that phase of your life, will cease to matter.\
It is paramount to recall as much detail as possible. And here is why: Remember Bo? If you do not recall the detail, you will not be able to erase it. If you are unable to erase it, whenever you are going to see similar color of walls, people with similar expressions, even similar food that you had that day, it will silently trigger the negative or downing emotion in you. Hence, I cannot stress enough the importance of recalling as much detail as possible. The information recall in the fifth session, for instance, will be much greater compared to the first. So, repeat this exercise till you get over the incident completely. Devil is in the details!\
You can also do this practice with a friend who is willing to listen to you without judging. You could take turns. You could help the other person heal, and they, you. That is why sharing, talking it out with someone nonjudgmental can make one feel lighter. Each time you talk it out, it further reduces the impact of that emotion. This is the reason people tend to share their ordeals with their friends. This is mind\'92s natural coping mechanism. When you speak about it, the imprint softens.\
For more, read this post I wrote a while ago on karmic trail and psychic imprints.\
No imprint means no pain. No pain means you are healed. Healing of the mind is almost like returning to your original state of peace and bliss, of joy and happiness, of compassion and tolerance.\
Heal yourself; you owe it to yourself. Treat yourself; you deserve it. Be yourself; you are worth it.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
The Law of Attraction\
You have probably read about the law of attraction. It talks about how to get from the universe whatever you want, that, you can attract love, wealth, good people and many other things in your life. Many a time people approach me and ask for my opinion about the whole theory and if there is any truth to it. They ask me if it is really possible to manifest, to attract, to get exactly what we want. And if it is, where are they going wrong, why are their dreams still unfulfilled? They tell me they have not done any bad karma (really!?), they have practiced visualization as per the book and yet they are exactly where they did not want to be.\
Let me share a secret with you: You only ever get what you give. You give money, you get money; you give love, you get love; you give appreciation, you get appreciation and so forth. Once you start giving something, not only do you start getting that back, but much more. And, Nature always returns multifold. This is the unfailing law of nature, of attraction: you must be willing to part with what you wish to attract.\
If you have ever been in the mountains, you may have experienced the echo phenomenon. Whatever you say out loud, it is said back to you multiple times. The more you shout, the louder it gets back to you. This is the law, the fundamental principle. If you shout me, me, me, the universe shouts back at you me-me-me-me-me\'85 If you say, I want money, it says I-want-money, I-want-money, I-want-money\'85 If you shout give me love, it echoes back give-me-love, give-me-love and so forth. Nature\'92s magnitude is much greater than yours. By shouting, you cannot win. The more you want, the more it wants too.\
Once you start to give, it starts to give you back. When you start to say, I want to give, it says back I-want-to-give multiple times, when you shout I am grateful, it shouts back I-am-grateful\'85 When you say, I don\'92t want anything, it also says back I-don\'92t-want-anything\'85 You sow one kilogram of rice, you get four kilograms back. You can only ever reap what you sow and you can do so only after you have sown.\
I have been out of the ashram the past few days. I had to visit a dentist to get my sensitive gums treated. I often ate snow while in the Himalayas and that perhaps had made the situation worse. It was my first visit to this particular dentist. A periodontist, he had a state of the art clinic. He was passionate, knowledgeable, spoke kindly, informed well and treated with care and compassion. The treatment finished in two sittings. At the end of it, when I tried to pay for the treatment, he would not accept the payment. He said the vibes he got from me was his payment, that, he saw this as an opportunity to do some good, to do some service. I practically pleaded to pay. Predominantly because I have never accepted donations of money or material gifts for any personal needs. I try not to keep what can be given. Nothing burdens me more than taking material gifts. But, he was adamant. After much toing froing, he accepted a partial sum.\
Clearly, his karma has been registered in the universe. He is bound to get a thousand percent back. I know for a fact that this dentist is going to roll in money in the future; not because he offered to give, but with the sentiments and nobility he did so. This is how Nature operates. He gave without expectations and Nature will give him back without conditions. He was willing to give for what he worked, he was keen to share, Nature, therefore, will also part with the same, give him the same.\
If you are just living for yourself, it is amateurish to even try the law of attraction, a little too ambitious to expect that Nature will give you just because you are asking for it. If you cannot spare even a dollar for a noble cause, at least, you can spare some kind words, compassion, appreciation. If you cannot fill anyone\'92s pockets with money, perhaps you can fill someone\'92s heart with love. Nature does not require your money. It does not operate on money, it sustains on love and compassion. If you do your part, it always does its. By giving you become worthy of receiving.\
What is more important to you: getting what you want or receiving what you need, to be careful about what you have or to be careworn about what you lack? Giving makes you light.\
If Nature chooses you as the medium to give, you are one fortunate person. To get what you want, you must start giving it first. And, learn to exercise patience. Nothing happens in a jiffy in the play of nature. This is the law of attraction.\
To attract iron, you must become a magnet, to attract bees, you need to become a flower. There is no room for artificiality. Genuinely be the magnet, and you will pull naturally.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Setting and Achieving Goals\
A reader requested me to write on setting goals. So, today, I am sharing my philosophy on goal setting. Let me begin with a little story:\
On a gorgeous sunny day, under the soft winter sun, Mulla Nasrudin and his best friend were lying on the plush bed of green grass in a stately garden. They were enjoying the sun bath. Trees stood gracefully in an organized fashion as if forming a natural boundary of the garden, they were arching over the pathways. Blooming flowers of various hues made the place look like a Floriade. Bees were hopping from one flower to an another. Birds were unobtrusively tweeting and singing in the trees. Warm breeze caressed and massaged them as it traveled intermittently, as if playing hide and seek. It was peaceful and serene.\
\'93Oh! How beautiful,\'94 sighed Mulla. \'93Right now, I would not trade places with anybody for even a million dollars.\'94\uc0\u8232 \'93How about for a hundred million?\'94 asked his friend heightening the appeal to insane levels.\u8232 \'93Nope. Not even for the combined wealth of the whole world would I give this up!\'94\u8232 \'93Well, how about three? I can give you three dollars right now to leave this place.\'94\u8232 \'93Hmm\'85Three? Alright, that\'92s different. Now you are talking real money,\'94 said Mulla sitting up with the intention to move.\
This anecdote underscores a beautiful message: your mind does not take even the most lucrative dreams seriously but it is willing to act on the tiniest of real possibilities of rewards, of gains. You eat real food, you work real jobs, you wear real clothes, why not have real goals? Reality does not always mean that you need to aim low, it means you genuinely believe it to be practical.\
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\f4 \cf9 1. Believe in your goals\
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\f1 \cf2 The most important thing about goals is that you must genuinely believe in them. It should be a bite size piece cut out of reality and not a monstrous meal snatched from the fangs of day-dreaming. There is a fundamental difference between dreaming and goal setting. Your conscious mind will only allow you to believe in what you consider real. It has evolved that way. However mythical your concept, your reality or your goal may be for the whole world, if you believe it to be real, you can turn it into your goal. Whatever you can work towards, can be your goal.\
Your reality is dependent on your beliefs, commitment, efforts and mindset. Imagine a mango hanging five feet above you. You know you can jump two feet comfortably and if you stretch your arm, you can easily reach four feet. You only have to jump a little harder and stretch more to gain that extra one feet. Your mind believes it to be attainable. It is based on your belief, your reality that you may attempt to jump. The same mango when twenty feet high, will discourage you to even try. Aiming for a mango at twenty feet is not unrealistic or unattainable, especially if you are serious about getting it. However, jumping alone will not accomplish it. You will require some sort of paraphernalia, perhaps a slingshot, a stone, or a ladder and so forth. Your conscious mind automatically comes up with ideas if it believes in your goal.\
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\f4 \cf9 2. Work towards your goals\
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\f1 \cf2 Dreams are not something you work towards, you just have them. Goal is what you are willing to work for. You have probably heard about SMART goals. SMART stands for Specific (what), Measurable (how much), Attainable (how), Realistic and Timed (when). I reiterate: your mind will only allow you to put a serious effort towards what you truly believe to be a real goal. Perhaps having a SMART goal is not enough, it should be SMARTER where E is for Evaluate and R, Realign. If you are prepared to work towards your goals, you have much greater chance of attaining them. Sometimes, they say, it is all about being at the right place at the right time. If you are persistent, your chances of ending up at the right place at the right time go up significantly. Probability of miracles in your life go up, fortune starts to favor you. Be patient and be persistent. Be determined and be disciplined. Results will certainly come through. Evaluate your goals and realign if necessary.\
Dreams are many, but goals are those dreams that you believe to be real, feasible, those dreams that you prioritize. Imagine a kid in a candy store, she wants to have everything. But she must pick and choose based on what all is allowed or affordable. From the store of your dreams, pick the ones you cannot be without. Prioritize your goals and align your actions. Achieving each goal requires time and efforts. If you can be infinitely patient and eternally persistent, you can attain even the most extraordinary goals. You can dream as big as you like, especially if it helps you stay motivated, but you need to be realistic about your goals if you are serious about their attainment. First you define your goals and then they define you.\
Do you know your greatest strength in attaining your goals? Your habits. And your greatest weakness? Your habits. Discipline is a habit, so is indiscipline. Read the last three posts on attraction, psychic imprints and erasing them to form the right habits and achieve the desired results.\
Spend time understanding yourself before you define yourself. If you are patient enough to analyse yourself, you will be potent enough to elevate yourself.\
Take it easy. Not for granted.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Coming out of Negativity\
Sometimes you are down, going through a phase of seemingly endless struggle, it feels as if all your achievements, personal or professional, in the past were fluke, as if you will never be able to restore harmony in your life again, you remain unsure whether the light you see at the end of tunnel is actually a ray of hope or an oncoming train. You feel listless while life looks lacklustre. Many around you do not seem to care and most of those who do, are unable to help you; you experience loneliness.\
There is no doubt that life can have boldly contrasting colors. Almost everyone, if not absolutely everyone, goes through their own share of struggles and challenges. The bigger your ambition, the tougher the challenge, the greater your resistance, the harder your struggle. This is how it works. Struggle is the result of resistance, everything else is hard work. Hard is a relative term, a state of mind. Struggle and challenges are not absolute in themselves, they are relative. The stronger your mind, the greater your ability to pull through any situation.\
Some are naturally stronger than others. I am specifically referring to mental strength. Your mindset and your mental strength are the two most critical factors, the most important elements to help you come out of negativity. Negativity kills your motivation, it makes you weak, and almost shuts down your mind. When circumstances are adverse, at that moment, you have a choice to focus your mind on negative or positive thoughts. It is a matter of choice. If you let negativity become your habit, you will mostly find yourself sulking.\
In a struggling relationship, if you cannot be without the other person for whatever reason, you had better find a way to be happy, to focus on the positives, the virtues of your partner. If you are determined enough to move out of your relationship, you are perhaps strong enough to make it work too. You cannot fix it by being negative. Undesirable or unpleasant situations can make you feel low and as you get more negative, such situations go beyond your control further damaging your emotional and mental state. It is a catch twenty-two situation. Either you need to move out of the situation or your negativity. Both will accomplish the same outcome. Here are some suggestions for you. They are not mutually exclusive. Try a mix and match, a trial and error approach to see what works best for you.\
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\f4 \cf9 1. Focus on the positives\
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\f1 \cf2 You can train your mind to focus on the positive aspect. No matter how dire the situation, it possibly cannot be all negative. For example, your relationship is not working out and you feel down about the whole affair. Make a list of everything you like about your partner, your present life. Review and read this list. It will trigger a sense of gratitude. Positivity will germinate automatically as a result. It is impossible to be grateful without being positive.\
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\f4 \cf9 2. Accept the situation\
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\f1 \cf2 This approach will help you feel peaceful. For instance, your partner provides for you and is a caring and a loving person. However, he does not appreciate many things you do. That is his nature. You have brought up this issue multiple times but nothing has changed. If appreciation is that important to you, think of moving on. Otherwise, if you accept the situation, you will experience peace and positivity.\
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\f4 \cf9 3. Accept your mistake\
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\f1 \cf2 I do not mean it in the negative sense. Sometimes, it can happen that you end up at the wrong end in a wrong relationship. In my personal opinion, regardless of the reason, one should never put up with an abusive partner. If, in spite of trying everything, his abusive nature remains unchanged, accept that you made a mistake by signing up for this relationship; it is time to move on. An abusive relationship can cripple you in no time, mentally, emotionally and financially, and sometimes, irreparably so. You deserve better.\
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\f4 \cf9 4. Focus on action\
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\f1 \cf2 Irrespective of being in a struggling relationship or shattering situation, regardless of whether you are going through a personal turmoil or professional crisis, you can expect very little to change without action. You must act if you want to see change. Action diffuses negativity. When you focus on action, your situation is bound to change.\
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\f4 \cf9 5. Meditate\
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\f1 \cf2 Light meditation where you consciously meditate on happy moments, on beautiful times, on bright future, on joyous visualizations, can make you feel positive in a matter of minutes. The impact from any meditation is directly proportional to its intensity, regularity and lucidity.\
Negativity directly affects your consciousness, your mind and therefore your body. In fact, it is a disease, a mental ailment. If you choose to stay negative, you will become a stress head, age quicker and contract diseases faster. Unlike most physical afflictions, this one is a matter of choice. If you choose to stay positive, no one can stop you.\
When you are down, that is the time to muster your inner strength. The test of strength of a rubber band is when it is stretched. When life stretches you a little too hard, relax. Remind yourself that this is not the end of the world. The One who has provided for you all these years, will do so in the future as well. Remind yourself that your fears are simply your mind playing tricks.\
Whether the magician cuts up a woman in two or conjures up an elephant from nowhere, it is all one big illusion. Your mind is an apt magician, an extraordinary one in fact. However, if you do not buy the ticket, there is no show. Regardless of who is at fault, it is you alone who will get affected the most by staying negative. So, for your own good, be positive. Drop those thoughts that make you weak. They are not worth holding onto. Architect your own life, design your own show. Forgive yourself, set yourself free.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Broken Marriages of Five Types\
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\cf2 \cb10 Today, my post is for those who are struggling in their marriage. They have tried everything they could think of, yet the struggle continues. In the last post I briefly talked about the\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/06/four-truths-of-marriage.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf12 four truths of marriage}}.\
\
Almost all couples go through at least one phase of crisis in their marital relationship. The nature of the relationship is such that episodes of deep conflict appear natural. Just when they thought they had it figured out, that they really understood each other, and that they could make it work together, they found themselves at the crossroads. This is the key to remember, if you are married, you are going to go through a period of crisis, at least one such phase that may completely challenge everything you know about yourself, your partner and your relationship. If you two can stay together during that difficult phase, there is very little probability of ever separating thereafter.\
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A pertinent question is how do you know if your marriage can work? Should you be putting your effort to try and pull on, or move on instead? There is no definitive answer as each individual is unique and each marriage, a little different. I can, however, offer you five analogies, metaphors if you will, of broken marriages. As follows:\cb1 \
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\f4 \cf9 \cb10 1. Fresh Wound\cb1 \
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\f1 \cf2 \
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\cf2 \cb10 Let us say you have a wonderful marriage. You are intimate, understand each other, share common interests and enjoy mostly a good life. There are no major arguments and there are no violent disagreements. The vehicle of your marriage is moving just fine. And one fine day, you find out that your partner cheated on you. Such cheating could range from flirting to philandery. Clearly, you are hurt. Badly. You feel your world has come to a dead end. You are certain of never being able to love your partner again. You feel suffocated. Well, do not call it off just yet. You may want to consider forgiving your partner if it was a one-off thing, if you sense sincerity. Like many other mistakes, this could simply be a mistake on his part, albeit a grave one. This is a fresh wound, it will heal over time. Provided, of course, it does not keep getting scraped again. But yes, it is going to leave a scar. God forbid, if you go through this, give yourself time, six months to a year, to see if you feel differently before making a radical decision.\cb1 \
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\f4 \cf9 \cb10 2. Dented Car\cb1 \
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\f1 \cf2 \
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\cf2 \cb10 When you are on the road for hundreds of days in a year, it is quite possible for your car to get scratched. Even if you are ultra careful, a shopping cart in the parking lot may come uninvited chipping your car. Some rowdy ones may do graffiti on your car, some jealous or ignorant types may just enjoy drawing on it with their keys. Sometimes, in a marriage, external factors can cause damage to your relationship. That could be demands at work, social commitments, expectations of in-laws or other family members and so on. Often, these ones are manageable with mutual understanding and commitment. Sit down and talk to each other, work it out, make changes, prioritize. Do not let these minor scratches ruin your driving pleasure. They can be repaired and more importantly, they are inevitable.\cb1 \
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\f4 \cf9 \cb10 3. Birth Mark\cb1 \
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\f1 \cf2 \
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\cf2 \cb10 Imagine a birth mark, a prominent one, on the face. There is very little you can do about it, unless you choose some artificial method.\'a0The partners are stuck together for whatever reason, may be because of their children. Sometimes they believe they are making a sacrifice, but many a time, they lack an option. They have no where to go, no one to look upto and their inner turmoil makes them confused. A lot of marriages fall under this category. The two partners are not living, just living by, they are not together, just living together, they are not in love anymore, just loving, theirs is not just about two opinions but a fundamental difference of opinion.\'a0If you cannot move out, and you cannot make it work the way you wish, you better find a way to be happy, to be at peace.\'a0There is no point complaining in this type of marriage. It will not yield any results, in fact, it will end up making you more negative and stressed.\'a0This marriage is unlikely to offer you that joy, bliss and care you may be seeking. Turn inward; that is the best recourse, the way to permanent bliss, unconditional, unsullied, independent and unselfish. Have a little bit of self dialog, discover your own method, your own path. Turn that birth mark into a beauty spot.\cb1 \
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\f4 \cf9 \cb10 4. Broken Vase\cb1 \
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\f1 \cf2 \
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\cf2 \cb10 Some marriages are like the broken vase. Just before getting dropped, it was beautiful, carefully crafted and was holding together fresh and fragrant roses. One careless move and bang! It shatters into pieces. Someone did not exercise care. The greater the fall, more the damage. If it shatters into hundreds of pieces, it is not possible to repair anymore. If, however, the drop was not so great, one may be able to put it together again. It will forever look patchy though, it will never be the same again. It will become a great degree more fragile thereafter. The impact of the drop is directly proportional to the gravity of the error. You cannot undo your own or your partner\'92s acts; if the pieces cannot be rejoined and you have a choice, move on and learn to get over it.\cb1 \
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\f4 \cf9 \cb10 5. Malignant Tumor\cb1 \
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\f1 \cf2 \
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\cf2 \cb10 This type of marriage is not about a one-off mistake, it is repeated abuse of trust, of sanctity. If your partner just does not care, could not be bothered, if he has made it clear that he will not change his ways, that, this is the way he is, you can try your best, it will make absolutely no positive impact on the quality of your marriage. If you can be without such a partner, move on. And, if you cannot be, there is no point searching for answers. If you are stuck because you cannot be independent, you practically have no choice. A relationship like this only worsens with time. This is the harsh truth. If the other partner does not believe there is a problem, that, anything needs resolving, how can any corrective measures ever be taken? When a tumor is malignant in nature, it needs to be removed, lest it results in a terminal condition. There is no other option.\cb1 \
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\cb10 Good marriages are like maintaining a garden. You can do your own math as to what that may be like! To quote Jiddu Krishnamurti, husband and wife are like the rail tracks, they go parallel but never meet. My personal take on this statement: that is fine, however, issues arise when other lines come crisscrossing changing the course of these tracks! The danger is always at the junction, on diversions. If you are going straight, you have much less to worry about.\cb1 \
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\cb10 I wish there was a \'91u\'92 in marriage rather than an I. Perhaps, things would have been easier. Heavens! there is no \'91v\'92 in it either. No wonder, it requires constant care. Somewhere between mar, rage and age, sits the lonely I. Love has \'91v\'92 (we) in it. Fulfillment has \'91u\'92 before \'91i\'92 as does beautiful. Marriage is not all about what is in it, it is a great deal about what is silent about it, like we, you, us, ours. I is in marriage, but it is not about I, if it was, it would be more a mirage.\cb1 \
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\cb10 I will write more on the present topic, including why people cheat and when should you move out, in the next post or two. Stay tuned.\cb1 \
\cb10 Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\cb1 \
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Why do people cheat?\
Why do people, especially men, cheat in a relationship? Cheating is an abuse of trust, it means you have been taken for granted, for a ride. Like many other artifacts of one\'92s personality, cheating is a habit too. It is a conscious act. People cheat when they lack inner fulfillment. Although that is no justification, it remains the primary cause; they are seeking fulfillment in a pleasure outside of what is reasonable. One\'92s sense of fulfillment is rarely dependent on external factors; such factors may influence but inner peace remains a personal matter.\
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You can be the best partner in the world, you may be most caring, giving, loving and faithful, that still does not guarantee any loyalty from the other side. If your partner is the restless type, like the monkey that hops from one tree to another, the baboon that flings to the nearby available tree, he is more prone to engage in\'a0extracurricular activities. Predominantly because that is part of his fabric. There is never a reason for cheating, only an excuse. So, here are the top three:\
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\f4 \cf9 \cb10 1. Opportunity overrides obligation\cb1 \
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\f1 \cf2 \cb10 This is the foremost cause. They cheat because they can. Given time and opportunity, some can bend truth and stoop down to alarmingly low levels. Getting into a relationship, specifically marriage, comes with certain mutual and individual obligations. When opportunity is allowed to overtake obligation, the result is an act of cheating. It is not always about infidelity, it may well be about non-fulfillment of one\'92s\'a0social, moral, emotional and financial obligations.\'a0In fact, often a lack of understanding and commitment on these fronts causes a relationship to go stale. If your partner escapes the opportunity of fulfilling an obligation or uses the opportunity to escape an obligation, it is an indication of non-seriousness and deceit, of insincerity and non-commitment. Marriage and commitment are\'a0synonyms.\cb1 \
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\f4 \cf9 2. Lust defeats love\
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\f1 \cf2 This remains the primary cause. All living entities are made up of tiny units of atoms, of cells, of molecules and so forth. Human mind is made up of atomic units of thoughts. Each unit is complete and independent in its own right. Love is like a movie\'a0\cb10 \'97 it is ongoing and spreads over a period of time whereas lust is like a snapshot. Lust is innate. Just before lust turns into an act, there is the thought of lust. It takes a great deal of effort to drop the thought, the easier route for majority is to slake their lust, to temporarily get rid of the thought by fulfilling it. However, since thoughts are ceaseless, before long, they experience an arousal of lust again. It is a vicious cycle. Anything that ties you down, be it any habit, belief, religion, anything that narrows your viewpoint, limits you as a person, all acts that give you a sense of guilt, will weaken you. And when you are weak, your mind will easily override your conscience. Driven by lust, when one engages in immorality, it means he is weak. If anything, your love should propel lust and not the other way around.\'a0\cb1 \
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\f4 \cf9 3. Habits die hard\
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\f1 \cf2 They cheat because it is their habit. Only a certain degree of self-discipline, self-reflection can help one to discard their undesirable habits. The old saying of birds of the same feather flock together applies to habits too. If you observe carefully, you will find that a noble one can have many good habits and a cruel one, many bad habits. The one who can lie comfortably, can cheat easily too. You can never change anyone\'92s habits except your own. It is only when your partner decides to change and act towards it will he change. Change may be triggered by external factors, it is always an inner calling though. It is for this reason that meditation and other similar activities can give one the strength to change. Primarily because meditation is an act of turning inward; that invariably brings strength.\'a0\cb10 Habits are habits, they move in groups.\'a0\cb1 \
Definition of cheating can vary a great deal from culture to culture. There are certain sects, nations, cultures, even religions, that allow a man to have more than one simultaneous relationship. Morality is not always an absolute concept. What may be moral for you, may be immoral for them and vice-versa. So, how do you know whether your act is moral or immoral, whether you are cheating or if you simply made a one-off mistake? The answer is quite simple in fact. First and foremost, your conscience always guides you onto the path of light and truth. If you can follow your conscience, you will know right from wrong. Secondly, all else being equal, if you truly believe you did not do anything wrong or that it was an innocent mistake, you should be able to go up to your partner and confess.\
Just like exercising, diet and a healthy lifestyle reduce the probability of diseases; harmony, understanding, transparency in a relationship greatly diminish the chances of adultery. Give each other some personal space so there is room to discover, sustain and nurture a sense of individuality. Stronger individuality leads to better dependability. And, fulfillment in any marriage comes from how dependable it is for you\'a0\cb10 \'97\'a0emotionally, physically, intellectually and financially.\cb1 \
No one wants to be the bad guy, be unhappy, people do not aim for disharmony. Tied by desires they cannot let go and driven by their habits, they engage in acts they may repent later on.\
I may reflect more on the present topic going forward, especially when it may be prudent to call it quits in a relationship.\
Till then, make each other feel important, fill each other\'92s cup up, be each other\'92s strength. Complete each other. The strength of a relationship is directly dependent on how important you make the other person feel.\
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\cf2 \cb10 Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 Swami\
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When to Move out of a Relationship?\
\cb10 Had life\'a0been\'a0black-and-white , decision making would be great deal easier. That is not always the case, however. Sometimes relationships can be really confusing. Your partner is good with you one moment and terrible the next. He makes promises igniting a hope in you and before you know he is back to square one. You are made to ride an emotional roller coaster. You make yourself strong to move out of the relationship, but, just when you do that, a spate of good incidents force you to think otherwise. So, when should you really move out of any intimate relationship, be it marriage or any other? Well, continue reading for the answers.\cb1 \
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When two people come together, a new entity is born, it is called relationship. Think of relationship as an independent entity, like a joint bank account if you will. Whether you withdraw money or deposit it, whether you lose your ATM card or use the overdraft facility, whether you gain interest or pay installments, all transactions have an impact on your account. And, that is regardless of who of the two does the transactions. Similarly, every action of yours or your partner\'92s makes a difference to the relationship \'97 positive or negative. To better understand my viewpoint, remind yourself that a relationship is a third person. It is not what you are getting from your partner, but from your relationship. It is mutual ownership. I am personifying the three types of undesirable relationships for you:\
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\f4 \cf9 1. The Abusive\
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\f1 \cf2 This one is a no brainer. It is relatively easy to make a decision either way. It is not uncommon to end up in an abusive relationship. If your partner is the abusive type, no matter what, exit, move out. It is unlikely that his nature is going to change, it is highly improbable for that relationship to ever get better. There can never be a reason for abuse nor any justification. If you have children and you are thinking of putting up with abuse for their welfare, it is a mistake. They will emerge stronger and better human beings living in a peaceful environment. It is better to have a loving and caring family with a single parent than a loathing one with both. If you cannot move out because you are not financially independent, you must gather your inner strength, explore your options and gain such independence. No doubt, you may end up with drastic changes in your lifestyle, your standard of living may go down, but your quality of life will go up significantly.\
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\f4 \cf9 2. The Pitiful\
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\f1 \cf2 This one is a common scenario. In this type, there is a fundamental mismatch in partners\'92 viewpoints, preferences, likings and so forth. One partner tends to be weaker than the other. The weaker one is often more attached to the relationship. They both recognize that the weaker one needs to change. He tries to mend his ways, he sincerely tries to change but without much success. It is hard to pinpoint whether he is unable to change due to lack of discipline, or, capability. One of them has some fulfillment out of their marriage, and the other one, barely any. There is no physical abuse in the relationship, perhaps only emotional abuse in the form of unkept promises, unmet expectations, unfulfilled desires. Such promises, expectations and desires that were made and agreed upon mutually but one of the partner is unable to match up. The stronger one may not move out because he pities the weaker one. They keep telling themselves that the other person is trying to change. The fact is that you cannot be in love with someone out of pity. You can be caring, loving, concerned but not in love.\
So, should you stay put or call it quits when a relationship is an average one, it is non-abusive but also unfulfilling? The truth is, it is you alone who can make that decision. Do not seek external opinions or affirmations. You sit down in peace and jot down what is important to you. For example, is money more important to you than love, your own fulfillment or having both parents for your children? Make a list; based on what matters to you, arrive at a decision accordingly. And, if you do move out, make sure you take your time before getting into another relationship. I have often seen that people end up repeating patterns in their relationships. They repeatedly make similar choices ending up in similar relationships. Spend time with yourself in solitude. If you want to make the existing relationship work, or you just cannot call it quits, you are only left with one choice: accept your partner exactly the way he is. You have tried to change him, and he has tried to change himself but it has not worked. Acceptance will give you peace.\
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\f4 \cf9 3. The Insignificant\
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\f1 \cf2 This one is even more complicated. In this type of relationship, there is nothing seriously lacking in your partner or in the relationship for that matter. You both are doing well in your respective careers. However, the relationship has become insignificant in your life. The charm died long ago and fulfillment has disappeared. It has truly become like a bank account \'97 transactional. You cannot pinpoint your finger at one thing. Nothing is missing as much as nothing is left in the relationship. Your bedroom conversations sound like boardroom meetings, they are all about planning and practicality, reporting and reviewing, decisions and directions. In other words, boardroom has become bored-room.\
This is one of the top causes that prompts individuals to go outside their marriage or relationship for flings and other alliances. They have grown tired of eating bland food, day in day out. Sometimes such flirting takes a serious turn transforming into an affair. The one who has discovered and revived love and laughter in his life, decides to move on. The other partner feels betrayed. Before they move out, the relationship shifts to type two: the pitiful type. The infidel is no longer attached to the existing relationship and tries to love the partner out of pity. He cannot punish the partner because the other person has not done anything wrong. But loving out of pity does not and cannot continue for long. And before they know it, they end up on the two different poles.\
However, if the two partners remain sincere, it is possible to restore harmony and love. In fact, it easier because a certain degree of care and understanding is already there. Find and play on that common ground, not of responsibilities but of joy, of fun, of living, of loving.\
Go on! sit down like adults and work it out. Working out can be more pleasant than moving out, giving is better than giving up, growing together is better than growing out.\
Discover your own truth, find your own way, chalk out your own path, the one where there is room for two to move together.\
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\cf2 \
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\cf2 Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Four Pillars of an Everlasting Relationship\
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\cf2 \cb10 Most people enter into a relationship with the intention of making it work, with the hope of deriving joy together, with the goal of being together. The intentions are as noble as the partners themselves. However, why do relationships that looked solid and iconic as the Taj Mahal once come crumbling down like a sandcastle? In the last few posts, I have been writing on relationships, especially marriage, and today I bring to you the key to everlasting relationships. My core philosophy that can help you understand relationships better and live the one of your dreams.A good relationship has four pillars, columns of strength and togetherness. The building of any close relationship stands on these four pillars. Spacious and cozy rooms of faith, love, respect, intimacy and understanding are built on these pillars. If the foundation is strong, you can withstand, with remarkable ease, storms of mutual and personal crisis, floods of turmoil, tides of emotions and a whole heap of other unprecedented circumstances and adversities.\
The four pillars of a relationship are the four types of securities. Think of relationship as an individual entity, a building if you will. Your job is to ensure the strength of these four pillars, the four different types of security. Each pillar is equally important. So, here they are:\
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\f4 \cf9 1. The pillar of financial security\
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\f1 \cf2 One of the most important factors in the survival of any relationship is financial security. It is your financial well being alone that will ensure a roof over your head among fulfillment of other basic requirements. Loving is tough with empty stomach, and living, next to impossible. If you are not financially secure or you cannot provide financial security to your partner, your relationship can fall apart any day. In a marriage, if you cannot run the house on one salary, chances are, your borrowing or spending is outside the bounds of affordability, or your finances are poorly managed. If both partners are earning and one were to lose their job, are you able to provide security to the other partner? In other words, does your partner feel safe that you can provide an umbrella during the rainy days? If yes, give yourself a pat on the back and mark it a tick. And, if you also have a savings plan you follow, bonus points to you. Twenty five percent of your relationship is taken care of. One fourth of harmony is resting on solid foundation.\
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\f4 \cf9 2. The pillar of physical security\
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\f1 \cf2 Are you there for each other physically? Physical security is not just about protecting your partner, it is not about being macho or a superhero; that might help though! By physical security I mean much more than that, I am referring to an act of intimacy, of being physically together. Interestingly, people enter into a marital or similar relationship driven by their physical and emotional needs and as time goes by many either downplay such needs or start seeking gratification from other sources. Vedic scriptures permit union of a man and woman only for the purposes of procreation. The upside was a novelty remained in the relationship and the downside was either starvation or too many offsprings! If your partner can depend on you for physical protection in the hour of need as well as look up to you for fulfillment of his physical needs, your relationship can weather great crisis. The need for sense gratification goes on the back-burner over a period of time; it continues to simmer and seethe there, I may add. The need for intimacy never goes away completely. Therefore, physical security, both in terms of protection and fulfillment is paramount.\
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\f4 \cf9 3. The pillar of emotional security\
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\f1 \cf2 Financial crisis can be managed with talent and common sense, physical urges may subside over time, but emotional needs remain just as strong. In fact, even a slight vulnerability in any one of the pillars put the pressure on the other three to make it up. Imagine a dog hurting one of his legs, the pressure of moving, running, jumping is on the other three legs now. Love, gratitude, tolerance, compassion, forgiveness are emotions. All these emotions are highly contagious. If you practice them, nurture such virtues, imbibe those emotions, you will contribute significantly to the health of your relationship. Repairing any damage to the pillar of financial or physical security is relatively easier, but this one is a pillar of gold. Any grief you cause your partner on this front with your gestures or words will injure their heart, it will mar their love, it can cause a deep wound. If you are emotionally there for each other, you can be assured of a fulfilling relationship. Predominantly because it is during their weak moments that people lose sight of their human side; losing that is generally enough to trigger a whole heap of monstrous emotions and regrettable actions.\
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\f4 \cf9 4. The pillar of moral security\
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\f1 \cf2 This pillar is made of crystal \'97 exquisite but fragile. Can your partner trust you morally? Any damage to this pillar is irreparable. The wounds from moral damage never heal. Never. If you have compromised on morality, your partner will never forget, even if they want to, they are unable to forget. They may forgive out of compassion or compulsion but the relationship now stands on a shaky foundation. Sound morality is the foundation of a fine and fulfilling relationship. Where to draw the line between moral and immoral? We need not even go as far as infidelity. Is lying always immoral, for example? What if you help someone against your partner\'92s consent? Well, there may be no set-in-the-stone rules for all situations, there are only guiding principles. There is someone you can ask who will never misguide you. And that \'91someone\'92 is your conscience. When in doubt, ask your conscience. It is easy to drown the voice of conscience in the loud rumbles of desires or justification. However, you do so at your own peril, at the cost of your own peace and bliss, it may even cost you the relationship. If you are not the type who can provide moral security, you should seriously consider not entering into a long-term relationship.\
That is all there is to a relationship: the four securities. Relationship is about giving, about sharing, about togetherness. If both partners can act like grown-ups, half the problems will disappear, and, if they can be there for each other, the other half never appear. If you decide to be happy, no one can stop you. Marriage, with all its price, continues to be a sacred institution like no other. It is like a gym membership, if you really want, you can go to the gym and work out, make friends and stay fit. However, if you are lazy or cannot find time, membership alone is not going to bestow good health. Similarly, if you want bliss, joy, togetherness, dependability from your relationship, you have to work for it.\
\'93Do you know mum,\'94 the new bride told her mother, \'93he gives me everything I ask for.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93That merely shows,\'94 replied her mother, \'93you are not asking for\'a0enough.\'94\
It is easy to ask, to want, to have, to expect, be sure you are at ease to give and share as well. Nature will reciprocate. It always does. And what if you feel, you are the only one giving in a relationship and you are not getting fulfillment from your relationship? Refer to my\'a0last post\'a0in that case.\
Take care of yourself and each other.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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\cf2 \cb1 \
Why do People Lie?\
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\cf2 \cb10 If you are truthful in a relationship, nothing hurts more than hearing a lie from your partner; sometimes knowing the truth may hurt even more, yet still, in the longer run, a lie causes more damage than truth. Mark Twain once said, \'93If you tell the truth, you don\'92t have to remember anything.\'94Lying is not as simple as telling the truth versus falsifying it. It is deeper than that. It is not always about distortion or non disclosure of facts, it may well be about creating a whole new set of truths that only the liar knows of. Today, I reflect on an interesting topic: why do people lie?\
It appears some lie for no reason at all, while many lie with great reasoning, some lie for a cause, and many build a cause to lie. It is not always about the flip side of truth. Sometimes, a lie stands on its own two feet. Upon deep examination, you will find that lying is a complex act, a complicated aspect of one\'92s personality, it is more than a habit, almost a natural human trait. Here are the three primary causes of telling lies, they are not mutually exclusive:\
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\f4 \cf9 1. To hide information\
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\f1 \cf2 Anything or any relationship that can be labeled comes with a set of expectations. Whether you are a teacher, student, husband, wife, CEO, manager, son, daughter, friend and so forth, anyone at all, living in the society, you are expected to behave in a certain manner. When you traverse the boundaries, you are suddenly out there in the open, unprotected and vulnerable. You have to protect yourself now, you have to safeguard the expectations and save your relationship.\
If you hide the information, if no one gets to know you crossed the line, if you are perceived to be within the bounds, treading only the thoroughfare, you continue to be a functional artefact of the social apparatus. It leads to a temporary sense of peace, a sense of match, of fitting in the society. You just bought yourself time, you did not have to put up with the arguments that might have taken place had you shared the truth. You did not have to hurt the sentiments or trust of the other person by covering up your truth. This is the foremost cause of lying. People lie because they want to avoid confrontation and conflict. Lying becomes the easier route.\
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\f4 \cf9 2. A matter of habit\
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\f1 \cf2 Often pursuing the first one, that is, hiding information, one gets into the habit of lying. When you repeatedly do the same thing over and over again, it becomes your habit. Perfection, carelessness, lack of detail or attention to detail etcetera are all habits as are telling the truth and lying. The habit of lying is formed, like many other habits, right from the childhood. Why? It must trace back to certain incidents during their early years or the atmosphere at home where speaking truth mostly ended up in an unpleasant conflict and undue scolding. When parents start to behave like kids too, it gives their children a strong reason to lie. By lying, they feel safe. However, this becomes their habit, their coping mechanism, their strategy to put up with all undesirable situations later on in their own lives. Unfortunate. It is incredibly hard to break the habit of lying.\
Like many other habits of smoking, drinking, punctuality and so on, children also pick up lying from their parents, other elders and peers. If you lie frequently, do not be harsh on your children expecting them to tell the truth. They will not follow what you tell them to do, they will follow what you do yourself. In other words, they do not learn from your instructions but actions. If this is how they see you living, it is but natural that they will follow suit.\
When lying becomes a habit, it leads to one of the two outcomes, and both are not mutually exclusive: the liar becomes fidgety with a wavering mind, or, they become aggressive with a depressed mind. Constant lying puts a tremendous burden on them to remember, to protect information, to bear the load of false information, to live the false identity. Over time, impatience, aggression, withdrawal, artificiality, depression, self doubt, low self-esteem, insecurity and the rest find a permanent home in the mind of a liar.\
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\f4 \cf9 3. To gain attention\
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\f1 \cf2 This third reason comes with a powerful revelation. It can help one gain attention, respect, power. When someone lies to you about an incident where he was the only witness, he now has access to information that no one else does. He has just created a new truth. Exclusive information naturally leads to greater power and more attention. It was not just greed that triggered the greatest corporate scandals in the world, it was also about an inherent, an innate, an obtuse sense of gaining more power and control.\
I remember reading stories of a certain hunter during my childhood. This hunter would come to the village and make up stories on how he gallantly killed a lion with his fists alone, or courageously wasted a bear with just a small knife and so forth. All the villagers would gather around him to listen to his fascinating, if not fantastical, accounts of valor and bravery. He got attention and respect. If this formula works for the liar, he continues to lie till eternity.\
There are some who live a life of lies, there are many who justify their lies, it is even possible for some to protect their lies, however, it comes at the cost of their inner peace. They may not lose relationships or respect, they will, sooner or later, be robbed of their inner peace, however.\
So, if you want your partner, your child, or your friend to tell you the truth, if that is important to you, you had better encourage an atmosphere conducive to truth. If you are going to pounce upon hearing a confession, that may well be the last time you will ever hear a truthful version. It is for this reason, forgiveness is considered a divine virtue. Because by forgiving not only are you strengthening yourself and your relationship but also making a difference to the life of the other person and subsequent generations.\
Next time you feel like reacting to someone\'92s lie, just take a moment and look within you. A realization may dawn and you may find it easy to forgive the other person. On the other hand, if you are the one telling lies, just remember the price is paid in peace and bliss. Truth is bold by nature, and lie, arrogant. The former instills courage, the latter, fear. Truth stems from inner strength, and lie, from the inability to gain such strength.\
Discover your own truth; it will set you free.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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\cf2 \cb1 \
Staying True to your Purpose\
It was about seven years ago. The country was Canada and I was getting my car serviced. I was waiting while they were readying the car. I casually picked up a magazine lying on the side table. It was some special anniversary edition of the Porsche magazine. It ran a feature story on Dr. Ferry Porsche, the founder of Porsche automobiles. The article started with a quote from him:\
\
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\f2 \cf3 At the beginning I looked around, but I could not find the car I was dreaming of. So I decided to build it myself. I figured there must be enough people in the world who have the same passion as I do.\
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\f1 \cf2 \
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\cf2 For over five decades he led the company constantly innovating, inventing, reengineering and producing some of the finest production sports cars in the world. The world wanted black cars, they wanted cars like Ford, but Dr. Porsche had a different vision, he had his own vision, in fact. He was on a mission. He just kept producing what he loved most, not just an automobile or any car, but an unparalleled driving pleasure, an unmatched living experience.\
There are three things I would like to share with you today, mostly regarding this blog. They would not have been possible without you.\
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\b \cf7 1.
\b0 \cf2 \'a0I have been writing here mostly since October last year. Prior to that, just a few posts in the preceeding quarter. We had twenty two subscribers till January this year, a few days ago we went past one thousand. I just kept writing and you all came by to share. Thank you.\

\b \cf7 2.
\b0 \'a0\cf2 We also crossed one hundred thousand views. In the month of january, we had two thousand views in total. Today, monthly views exceed more than thirty thousand. By we, I mean you and I.\
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\cf2 If writing to me, or, if reading my writings help you feel better, understand better, well then, Swami is here for you.\
Your fulfillment is going to come from pursuing what matters to you. So, what does matter to you? Do you know? Take a deep breath, slow down, stop, reflect, examine and you will have an answer before long. You need not carry on living a certain way just because everyone else seems to be doing it.\
Whether you are trading stocks or seeking truth, driving Ferraris or flying daggers, so long as you love what you do, you will experience joy. If you keep at what you are passionate about, you will find many willing to be a part of that passion.\
Let us make this world a better place. I will stay true to my purpose, and you, yours. When we are honest with ourselves, when we stay course, patiently chiseling away, with persistence and discipline, Nature reciprocates without fail.\
Love.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
Sex and Spirituality\
\
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\cf2 \cb10 I receive a large number of queries from seekers who are unclear about the role of sex on the path of spirituality, they wonder if practicing celibacy is necessary for self-realization, if,\'a0abstinence\'a0is a prerequisite to attain that transcendental state. I have been meaning to write on this for months but the mounting number of queries on this issue nudged me to cover this important topic today, albeit briefly.Interestingly, most religions, all major ones anyway, are bullish, if not downright rigid, about continence. Practitioners, protectors, priests and preachers of such religions are expected, if not required, to be celibates and they lay great emphasis on seekers to practice it too. Well, that is their opinion and I do not wish to judge them. My focus today is not religion, it is spirituality. Religion is one, only just one, of the means to experience spirituality.In order to help you build your own viewpoint, let me offer you four perspectives on sexuality.\
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\f4 \cf9 1. The Vedic Perspective\
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\f1 \cf2 Some vedic texts, notably Bhagvad Gita, equate celibacy to practicing an austerity. In\'a0
\i \cf7 brahmacaryamahins\uc0\u257  ca \u347 \u257 r\u299 ra\u7745  tapa uccayat\u275 
\i0 (Bhagvad Gita, 17.14)\cf2 ,\'a0celibacy is defined as\'a0
\i tapas
\i0 , penance, of the body. Any penance is done to gain strength, such strength you may use for the fulfillment of a certain objective. Penance is not the end in its own right. For example, you study hard, let us say ten hours a day, to secure a good rank in some competitive exam. During the\'a0preparation, you have a strict routine, you go by the timetable, but once you are through, you no longer keep following the old routine.\
Krishna clarifies this in:\cb1 \uc0\u8232 
\i \cf7 \cb10 v\uc0\u275 d\u275 \u7779 u yaj\'f1\u275 \u7779 u tapa\u7717 su caiva d\u257 n\u275 \u7779 u yatpu\u7751 yaphala\u7745  pradi\u7779 \u7789 am
\i0 \cf2 \cb1 \uc0\u8232 
\i \cf7 \cb10 aty\uc0\u275 ti tatsarvamida\u7745  viditv\u257  y\u333 g\u299  para\u7745  sth\u257 namupaiti c\u257 dyam\'a0
\i0 (ibid, 8.28)\cf2 \
The one who is firmly established in the exalted state, the one who has mounted the vehicle of yoga, rises above all tapas and methods. Such yogin has no longer any utility in practicing austerities.\
Also, in\'a0\'a0
\i \cf7 \uc0\u257 p\u363 ryam\u257 \u7751 amacalaprati\u7779 \u7789 ha\u7745  samudr\u257 pa\u7717  pravi\u347 anti yatvata
\i0 \cf2 \'85\'a0\cf7 (ibid, 2.70)\cf2 , Krishna states, just like many rivers merge into the sea but the ocean remains unmoved, the enlightened one remains still and is not perturbed either at the abandonment or acceptance of any sense gratification.\
An important point to remember is to accept vedic exposition in its entirety and not distort it as per your convenience. Till one goes through an intense practice, one is not a yogin, no matter how sound his intellectual understanding.\
Study of scriptures is designed to give you food for thought and wisdom to perform the right action. They are means to an end. When they are regarded as the end in themselvs, it gives birth to rigid second-hand knowledge and fanatacism.\
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\f4 \cf9 2. The Yogic Perspective\
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\f1 \cf2 Patanajali, in his aphorisms, lays\'a0
\i yama
\i0 , moral restraints, and\'a0
\i niyama
\i0 , external observances, as the foundation of his eight-limbed yoga helping the seeker attain meditational equipoise unearthing their superconscious state .\
In\'a0
\i \cf7 ahi\uc0\u7745 s\u257  saty\u257  \'91steya brahmacary\u257  \'91parigrah\u257  yam\u257 \u7717 \'a0
\i0 (Yoga sutras, 2.30)\cf2 , the sage does not put celibacy under\'a0
\i niyama\'a0
\i0 but\'a0
\i yama
\i0 . According to Patanjali, celibacy is about voluntary moral restraint. Predominantly because correct adoption of moral restraints helps one to stabilize one\'92s mind, its restive tendencies, it helps one to lead a life of purity. According to yogic texts, celibacy is about chastity and not necessarily abstinence. It is not an austerity one needs to practice to get somewhere, it is simply a way of life to help the practitioner remove distractions and live a life of balance, the middle way.\
There is nothing unchaste, unnatural or wrong about\'a0sharing intimate moments with your partner, this can only help your practice, saving of course certain practices of specific duration that may require otherwise. Only your guru can shed light on such\'a0
\i anu\uc0\u7779 \u7789 h\u257 na
\i0 , timed undertakings.\
Yoga means to join, to become one, to gain union of individual soul with the Cosmic Soul, to merge individual consciousness in the Supreme Consciousness. All\'a0
\i kriy\uc0\u257 
\i0 , practices, are designed to help you move towards and attain the aforesaid outcome. It is a journey from the outside to the inside. If I may put it, this is applied veda, practical application of the profound philosophy propounded in vedic texts.\
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\f4 \cf9 3. The Tantric Perspective\
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\f1 \cf2 Tantra is the rapid path to self-realization. Why rapid? Because it challenges everything you have been taught, it is designed to break off your conditioning, it uses seemingly obscure, although meaningful, methods to set you free from the shackles of dualities of good-bad, right-wrong, moral-immoral, hot-cold, light-dark and so forth.\
Kularnava Tantra, Neel Tantra, Sri Vidya Tantra, Tara Tantra, Kali Tantra, Chinnmasta Tantra and dozens of other tantric texts are replete with practices where exploration of sexuality is a vital aspect of\'a0
\i s\uc0\u257 dhan\u257 
\i0 , propitation, of adoration, of worship. Not all tantric rituals require presence of feminine energy or sexual activity; to tell you the truth, of the five major systems of tantric worship, only two require it absolutely, that too, only under certain circumstances. Practicing rituals with a female consort is not for the uninitiated nor for the beginners, it is for advanced practitioners. It is almost like playing with fire, unless you know the art, you may end up getting burnt, in this case\'a0\'97 compromising your practice and misunderstanding the essence.\
Tantric take on sexuality is rather unique. It regards human body as a temple, it considers reproductive fluids as sacred offerings, it accepts all elements as divine, it treats everything equally.\
Contrary to the popular belief, tantra does not encourage reckless sexual acts, it gently allows you to accept sexuality as part of your manufacture, your original composition. It is only upon acceptance can one understand, absorb and be comfortable with sexuality. For as long as you are uneasy with any concept, entity or viewpoint, you continue to harbor silent fears and inhibitions and you limit yourself from realizing your transcendental state.\
Yoga and vedas are important constituents of any tantric practice. Most tantric rituals utilize yogic practices and vedic eulogies and mantras. There is nothing called Tantric Sex, it is a misnomer, a catchy marketing term used by business minds to profit from the ignorance and fantasies of an average seeker.\
If time permits, in future, I may write, perhaps in a book form, on tantric philosophy, systems, rituals and practices separately. The world could do with some factual, original and authentic information on this subject I think. I have devoted years to tantric practices and have first hand experiences into some of the most intriguing aspects of tantra.\
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\f4 \cf9 4. My Own Perspective\
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\f1 \cf2 I have already stated my take on the three perspectives in the respective sections; however, let me offer you my explicit viewpoint on the present topic.\
You got your body because your parents engaged in an act of love. You came out of the womb of your mother and were latched to her breasts the moment you were born. Sexuality is the basis of your physical existence, it is part of your being. It as sacred as your love for God and as vital as your breath. Some of the greatest yogis, sages, seers were married. They lived in their hermitages but they had consorts. This is the path recommended by the vedas, slow and steady, go with the nature.\
If you gain inner strength, if you become a better, more compassionate, kinder, more loving person by practicing celibacy, you should continue with continence in that case.\
However, if you are married, and have developed this obscure idea of abstience being a shorter route to divinity, I am sorry to disappoint you but this is going to be a futile exercise. It is going to lead you nowhere near God. As part of strengthening your resolve, or certain practices that may last a certain duration, you may practice abstinence, but beyond that, I hope you have a very good reason.\
Regardless of whether you are seventeen or seventy, do not be scared of your sexual thoughts, do not react at such thoughts, do not label them. Thoughts are just thoughts, intrinsically, they are devoid of any essence. If, for whatever reason known only to you, you wish to stay away from physical intimacy, all you have to do is not pay attention to your thoughts. They will leave you in no time. Unless you are able to maintain your meditative state at all times, you will have hard time staving them off forever though. Sexuality is innate in every moving creature that breathes.\
Some of the greatest inventors, finest minds, geniuses, poets, world\'92s most successful people, peace workers, those who influenced millions of others, were they celibates?\
Physical love whether expressed by a gesture of a simple peck or a passionate kiss, eating together or making love, it is an extension, and outward expression, of your inner being, your feelings. It completes any intimate relationship.\'a0When channelized, sexuality transforms into love, when untamed, it becomes lust.\
Ultimately, it is something you need to reflect upon yourself, arrive at your own conclusion. My writeup is not be taken as the justification to go rampant and engage in immoral acts. Just stay true to yourself and ask your conscience. You will get all the answers. Either learn to channelize your sexual energy, or, expend it wisely. However, if you try to curb it, you will only experience frustration. Harnessing your sexual energy has tremendous benefits. Subduing it has enormous downside. So, what benefits do emerge from harnessing it and what is the process of doing so? That is the other side of the coin. Something for another time!\
Whether you wish to be a celibate or prefer to celebrate, be at ease, do what gives you peace and helps you help others.\
Discover your own truth.\
Peace.\
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\cf2 \cb1 Swami\
\
How to deal with Self-Doubt\
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\cf2 \cb10 Most have it some of the time and some have it most of the time, self-doubt. It is a byproduct of fear, fear of failure, of losing, of non-achievement. It is not always something you can just brush aside. Sometimes, it is borne out of a reasonable conclusion, a logical construct, a valid assessment. It may well be a state of mind acquired after cogitation. Ignoring your fear does not dispel it. False assurance does not remove the possibility of failure, and lack of success in your endeavor will lead to deeper fear and greater self-doubt. So, what causes self-doubt and what can you do about it? Keep reading.The process of winning over your fears, eliminating your self-doubt depends on the type and basis of such doubt. Without further ado, let me decipher and categorize it for you. Self-doubt can fall in one of the three non-exclusive categories:\
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\f4 \cf9 1. Based on Non-Action\
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\f1 \cf2 For example, a university student did not pay attention to his studies, he lagged behind in his coursework, and in a week from now are his exams. He is rushing to cover his syllabus but remains worried and doubtful about his passing the exams. He sits down to study but can no longer concentrate or persist because he has developed this fear of failure.\
Well, he has given himself every reason to develop self-doubt. In fact, it is not just that but his intelligent mind warning him. Chances are, under the ordinary circumstances, he is not going to pass his exam. He cannot regain his confidence by artificially consoling or pacifying his mind, a false assurance can only take you so far, ultimately, the reality is going to raise its head.\
The best way to overcome self-doubt of this type is to sincerely work towards your goal. Observe, learn, adapt, adopt, understand, persevere, do what you have to do to stay course, to hold your fort. Actions bring results, it is action alone that will lead you to your goal, and like they say, nothing motivates like success. With practice, you attain perfection.\
Practice. Persistence. Patience. If you work on these three, self-doubt will leave you forever, in the potent presence of success, it promptly loses its existence.\
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\f4 \cf9 2. Based on Past Experience\
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\f1 \cf2 A sense of self-doubt based on your past is a common scenario. Each time you fail, you register an emotion, an experience in your mind. Millions of years of evolution has transformed human mind to cling to negative emotions and fears. Some do it more than others. I do not know of anybody who never failed. Some get back to action and attain success, eliminating their fear while many hold onto their failures limiting themselves from exploring their full potential.\
Conscious mind is calculative, it is analytical, that is how humans have risen to the top of the food chain and this is the reason they have developed conscious and conditioned fears. I will elaborate on this term another day.\
For example, let us say, years ago, you tried to lose weight. You were supposed to control your diet and spend four hours at the gym every week. Disregarding the discipline, you did not work as planned, you went to the gym for six days in a row one week and only once the next. The weighing scale did not budge from its original reading. You started to lose interest and began doubting if you would ever be able to lose weight. And one day, you gave up and went back to your old lifestyle, causing even more damage to your physical and mental well being.\
When you allow yourself to fail, you weaken your mind, especially if you were not honest with yourself. Fear, doubt and other negative emotions thrive in a weak mind. If your sense of self-doubt is based on your failure in the past, all you have to do is reflect on the reasons of your failure. If you do not repeat the past actions, past results will not manifest. History can only repeat itself if you start living a historical present.\
Einstein once said, \'93Insanity is to keep doing the same thing but expect different results.\'94\
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\f4 \cf9 3. Based on Innate Fear\
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\f1 \cf2 Self-doubt based on fear is more common when one wants to tread the unknown waters, some even have the ripe opportunity, but they are either settled in their comfort zone or too afraid to try anything new; the latter is my present focus.\
Ability to take risks varies in each individual. If you have been contemplating on embarking on a new venture, trying something different, but self-doubt and fear of failure keeps holding you back, you can only address them by contemplation and strategy. If you are keen on learning how to swim, eventually, you have to jump in the water. There comes a time when you have to let go off the floaters and swim on your own.\
The best way to overcome fear based self-doubt is to write down your answers to the following questions:\cb1 \uc0\u8232 
\b \cb10 a.\'a0
\b0 Why do I want change?\cb1 \uc0\u8232 
\b \cb10 b.\'a0
\b0 Am I ready to embrace change?\cb1 \uc0\u8232 
\b \cb10 c.
\b0 \'a0What is the worst that can happen?\cb1 \uc0\u8232 
\b \cb10 d.\'a0
\b0 Do I feel competent enough to handle the worst?\
Reflect on your answers, prioritize and act accordingly.\
When you experience self-doubt, get to its root to remove it. Do not just ignore it, especially if it persists. It could just be your fear or it may well be your intuitive faculty guiding you. You will only know the truth upon self-reflection. And I reiterate, the most potent question you can ask yourself to overcome self-doubt is: What is the worst that can happen?\
Take it easy. Do not spend your time brooding over past, over-anticipating your future or making elaborate plans devoid of action. It is a precious life, do something priceless with it.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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\cf2 \cb1 \
How to overcome Distractions\
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\cf2 \cb10 A common query I receive revolves around people\'92s inability to carry out their resolve, their vow, to work right to the end, till their goal is accomplished. They are motivated, they have wisdom, resources, capability, yet they let distractions overpower them. Such distractions that cause a tide of emotions to rise, a tsunami of desires, shaking their resolve and crushing their strength to stay course, to stay firm. Yogic and vedic texts talk a great deal about\'a0
\i vikshiptata
\i0 , distractions, and how they are great obstacles. They can make all the difference between winning and losing, between success and failure.Let me help you understand distractions and ways to overcome them. They are of two types as follows:\
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\f4 \cf9 1. External distractions triggering inner reactions\
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\f1 \cf2 Let us assume, you committed to being a vegetarian and giving up alcohol. Everything was going fine until you were invited to that get together you could not afford to skip. Platters of your once favorite non-vegetarian dishes as well as vintage wine adorned the dining table. You feel tempted. Further, your folks around you force you to have some. You are given all sorts of reasoning and arguments to partake of what is at hand and not worry about your vow. Under social pressure and your own latent desire, you give into the temptations.\
In this case, an external environment, sighting of delicious food, triggered a whole heap of thoughts that weakened your resolve. Till you came to the party, you were at ease, but now, suddenly your inner world is in a turmoil and you let your heart rule your mind. In every likelihood, a sense of guilt will drape you soon after the party. Guilt weakens one\'92s consciousness.\
There are two ways to emerge winner while battling against external distractions:\
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\f4 \cf9 a. Remove yourself physically\
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\f1 \cf2 A conducive environment helps a great deal in executing any plan. In the present example, avoid going to such places, parties where it is but natural that you will be offered everything contrary to what\'92s good for you. After all, chances of emerging spotless working in coal mines are but remote. Unless of course, you exercise great caution, extraordinary care. \'a0If changing your physical environment is not possible sometimes, follow step b, as below:\
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\f4 \cf9 b. Make yourself clear\
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\f1 \cf2 Granted, some people may think you are arrogant, or that, you no longer care, or that you have changed and so forth. Let them. Trust me, let them. If they really love you, they will not think any of these things and if they do not, does it matter anyway what they think? Ultimately, it is you alone who will be bearing the consequences, paying for your choices, at that time, no one else will be able to help you. So, stand by what you stand for. This always worked for me; before I renounced, for years I attended events of all sorts but never even once did I compromise on my own principles. People around me understood and accepted it.\
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\f4 \cf9 2. Inner thoughts triggering external actions
\b \cb1 \uc0\u8232 
\b0 \cb10 \
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\f1 \cf2 Distractions of this type can be equally hard to manage. For example, let us say, you recently quit smoking. Day-in-day-out, you were living upto your own expectations and you did not smoke for ten days. One day, out of the blue, you just recollect the image of a cigarette, you try hard to not think of smoking but cigarette is what keeps coming back to your mind. You experience restlessness and the compulsion to smoke. The thought of smoking overpowers you to the degree that you get up and buy yourself a pack. There are two ways to overcome distraction of this type:\
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\f4 \cf9 a. Take your mind off\
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\f1 \cf2 Do not think about not doing the prohibited, instead just take a deep breath and focus your mind elsewhere. You cannot overcome thoughts of non-action by thinking about not acting on it. You must simply, gently, shift the spotlight of your thoughts. Change the scenery, get up, move around, win over a distraction with another one, a better one, if necessary. Do whatever it takes but do not give into the temptation.\
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\f4 \cf9 b. Exercise patience (postpone)\
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\f1 \cf2 This method is more powerful than you might think. Just give your mind a bait, tell your mind that you will revisit the idea after an hour or two hours or something like that. Just let the storm of distraction pass, let your thoughts settle, let your mind calm down. If you can rein the horses while distraction comes attacking, you will remain focused, winning the battle. You will emerge a winner, stronger and a more confident person.\
Now, regardless of the nature of distraction, let me share with you the two most potent questions you can ask yourself to help you make the right decision, always. Yes, always.\
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\f4 \cf9 1. Is this my best move?\
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\f1 \cf2 A chess grandmaster unfailingly asks one question before making each move in chess, and that is, is this my best move? That often prompts the player to think more, think better, think out-of-the-box and come up with extraordinary moves. Before you give in to a temptation, just before you decide to do something, a moment before taking an action, ask yourself: is this my best move, or, can I play better? If you are honest with yourself, you will find it easy to dissipate your distractions with minimal effort.\
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\f4 \cf9 2. What is the most that will happen?\
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\f1 \cf2 Remember, in the case of self-doubt, the best question was, what is the worst that can happen? Well, in removing distractions, you have to ask exactly the opposite. Let us say you are distracted and really want to drink alcohol, ask yourself, what\'92s the most that will happen? An ephemeral pleasure of a few hours, if that? Is that it? Is that enough to justify you compromising on your resolve? And if so, is that your best move!?\
Do you know who is your greatest friend, the one who can always stand by you and help you make the right decisions and make sure you tread the noble path? You. And your worst enemy? You.
\f2 \cf3 \cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 You alone are your best friend and your own worst enemy.\cb1 \

\f1 \cf2 \cb10 A slave, however well paid, however well kept, remains a slave.\
Go on! conquer yourself and be the king of your own empire, a master of your own mind, a captain of your own ship, live at your own terms. Discover yourself, your own truth.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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\cf2 \cb1 \
Compassion\
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\cf2 \cb10 Almost in all walks of life, if your inner strength, your focus, your efforts can outlive the adversities, you can succeed at pretty much anything you set your mind to. A kind heart leads to greater mental strength. It may sound paradoxical but compassion and tenacity are directly proportional to each other. Today, I am sharing with you a powerful practice to gain inner strength, to purify yourself, to help you transform yourself emotionally, mentally, so you may be the person you have always wanted to be.\
I have written a few times in the past that a certain degree of inner strength is required to be able to love somebody, to be their star, their guiding light, their pillar. Interestingly, the reverse is also true. If you choose to be loving, caring, supportive, compassionate, you will invariably emerge stronger.\
There was a mystic once, most considered him a self-realized soul. He practiced and preached compassion, truth, non-violence and other virtues. However, he had the habit of stealing. He would steal, hand himself in, plead guilty in the court and end up in the jail every time. This baffled his disciples, neighbors, the police, judge, even the jailor. They could not comprehend why would he steal, even though he lacked nothing. He clearly exhibited complete control over all his other actions, how come he could not conquer his habit of stealing, they thought. Nine out of twelve months he would spend in a prison. He was a serial offender, the judges were sympathetic towards him but there was little they could do.\
Over time, he got old yet he continued to steal. One day, his disciples and followers got together to confront him and said, \'93All your needs are taken care of, if there\'92s anything lacking, just order us and we\'92ll provide it for you, but please don\'92t steal. We can\'92t fathom your actions but it grieves our heart to see you go to jail and we really miss you when you are not around.\'94\
\'93Oh, so you miss me when I\'92m away! That\'92s exactly the reason why I go there because the prisoners miss me when I am not in the jail. You are free and you have access to many teachers, but they don\'92t have the same luxury. That\'92s why when I\'92m released, I steal again to go back in because not all prisoners are culprits and even those who are, they could do with a little compassion, a bit of help, some good company. I\'92ll continue to steal and help them.\'94\
The anecdote above is not to be taken literally of course. A jail is a place where your freedom is greatly restricted. Similarly, exercising compassion may not always be most pleasing to you, it may not be the attractive option, it may be like going to the jail, why else would the greatest prophets, preachers, messiahs bother to grace our planet, compassion remains a powerful catalyst of transformation though. It is a conscious act, a gesture of love, of care, of charity, you do with the sole intention of helping the other person.\
Anything you do with a selfless motive, with no hidden agenda, is always going to strengthen you. Such strength will help you experience peace and bliss, you will feel contented and fulfilled, just like you do shortly after your favorite meal. Think about it for a moment, why does a lion roam freely in a jungle? Because it is aware of its strength, its view of itself gives it the confidence and fearlessness to patrol and prey. In much the same manner, those with inner strength are naturally more confident, they are at greater ease, they are more peaceful.\
Compassion is one of the shortest routes to divinity. If you are expecting even gratitude in return for a compassionate act, your gesture is not the purest type. It is compassion still, but it may spark a negative emotion in you if recipient\'92s response does not meet your expectations. The finest compassion is without any expectation at all, a compassionate act is not about right or wrong, it just is. It need not make sense to the whole world as long as even one creature stands to benefit from your act.\
I am tempted to share another story with you:\
An elderly man was taking a stroll on the beach one morning. Ruthless tidal waves of the night before had pushed out many creatures to the beach, notably, the starfish. There were thousands of starfish lying on the beach, not all were dead. He felt sorry for the state of affairs but continued with his walk, for, there was nothing he could do about it, he felt.\
A few meters away, he saw another man, younger, more a teenager, childlike, bending down, picking something and throwing it in the ocean.\
\'93What are you doing?\'94 he asked, somewhat amused.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Oh, I\'92m saving these starfish. Sun\'92s gonna be up soon and they\'92ll die as the waves are receding.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The old man chuckled and said, \'93There\'92s miles and miles of beach, it\'92s littered with tens of thousands of dying starfish. Your saving a handful won\'92t make any difference.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The young one reached out to another starfish, picked it, tossed it back in the sea, and spoke, \'93It made a difference to that one!\'94\
I find this story truly beautiful. An act of charity is not always about material things, compassion is not necessarily about making grandiose plans and never finding enough time or steam to bring them to fruition, it may well be a small gesture, a random act, to an acquaintance or a stranger. It all adds up, it is like depositing money in your bank account. Your each compassionate act is a deposit in your emotional account of positivity, balance, and bliss. Practice compassion to be strong, you will feel grateful too, a sense of peace engulfs automatically as a result. However insignificant or irrational your act may appear to the world, let that not bother you, let that remain irrelevant.\
Either be strong, wise, kind and big-hearted to practice compassion, or simply be compassionate and other virtues will cling to you naturally, like pollen on bees, moth to a light-source, like iron to a magnet.\

\i Simiti simiti jala bharahi talava jimi sadaguna sajjana payi ava,
\i0 \'a0virtues accumulate in the noble one the same way as rain drops do in a pond, writes Goswami Tulasidasa. Practice one virtue and many more will make a permanent home in your heart.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Go on! practice a random act of kindness today! Make someone feel special, offer someone kind words, offer help, buy a movie ticket for a stranger in the shopping mall, for the parking attendant, for the cleaning staff, customer service, someone, anyone at all, pay for someone\'92s meal, for an ice-cream, whatever you can afford, anything that comes to your mind. Not only will you make a difference to someone\'92s life, you will sow the seed of goodness, it will sprout in their hearts one day and it will get passed on in one form or the other. This world will become a better place, and you, an even better person.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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\cf2 \cb1 \
\
Four Pillars of Love\
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\cf2 \cb10 A decent percentage of the emails I get are around shaky relationships. Sometimes it is about two people wanting to work it out, many a time, it is just one person trying to figure it out, a lot of the times, however, it is about a state of confusion. They write to me saying they are confused, they do not know if the other person is actually in love or if he is just being caring. They ask me if there are any signs, any way to find out. Well, love has never been a mathematician\'92s charm, it is like the tangent that touches the circle, but forever remains outside it.\
Goswami Tulasidasa, the great poet-saint, writes a beautiful line in Ramacaritamanasa:\'a0
\i \cf7 Priti pranaya binu mada te guni nasahi begi niti\'a0asa suni
\i0 \cf2 , love without respect and the talented with arrogance, perish quickly. So, while there may not be rules set in the stone, in black and white, the palace of love does stand on certain pillars. However, before I lay the foundation, let me tell you that men and women love differently, they desire it differently, and they express it differently. Irrespective of the differences though, let me share with you the four pillars of love, I call them four\'a0Ms of love, and no, M does not mean myth in this case, here they are:\
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\f4 \cf9 1. Mutual Care and Respect\
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\f1 \cf2 This is the first, foremost, and by far the most important sign, requirement, pillar, whatever you want to call it, of love. When we love someone, we want to see them well, we want to see them happy, we even do things to give them that joy and pleasure. In a relationship, any relationship where love is an important factor, care and respect are unmistakable signs that love exists between the two. Your partner may not express the way you prefer, however, if his gestures show respect and care, you are in a loving relationship. Such care and respect is not limited to the person alone but also to what they do. Just because you cannot fathom what the other person does, workwise, it does not mean you are dumb or he is stupid. Care and respect for the other person and their endeavors, nurture the emotion of love.\
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\f4 \cf9 2. Mutual Dependability\
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\f1 \cf2 If you can depend on your partner, his words, his promises, and he can do the same, that means love is alive and kicking. Of little use is love which may have all the smooth talk but no dependability. Reliability outlives charm ultimately. Being charming is not going to pay your bills, it is not going to put food on the table, someone, perhaps both, need to get out there earn a living, to support each other. Dependability is comparable to the cogs of a machine, both need to be in sync to operate, if one gives up, it breaks down the whole operation. If you are not dependable but expect dependability from your partner, it means you are not being practical and it shows weakness of the character, not morally, just emotionally. Why? It requires inner strength to be able to love, the greater such strength, the more the capacity to love, the weak ones only ever get attached, they mistake their attachment for love.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 A creeper that drapes around the tree to sustain itself but denies tree\'92s kindness, only shows its own ignorance.\
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\f4 \cf9 3. Mutual Trust\
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\f1 \cf2 There can be care and respect, there may be plenty of dependability, however, if mutual trust is missing, all is not well. Trust means your relationship is strong enough that you can share anything and everything with the other person, that, you have faith in yourself, in your partner, and in your relationship. It shows your relationship can weather trubulence. To err is human, it is only natural that life runs you through phases of vulnerability, of weak moments, of confusion, if you are dependable, if your relationship is sound, if you are a strong person, emotionally, spiritually, you will emerge a winner. You will be able to put your head down on your pillow with peace, you will be able to look in the mirror and smile, you will be able to keep your head high, not fuelled by ego, but supported by righteous conduct. A breach of trust signifies taking the other person\'92s love for granted, repetition of such breach means the relationship is now a bare bone skeleton of needs stitched together with the thread of requirements and lack of options, as opposed to a warm body of love, fragrant and attractive.\
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\f4 \cf9 4. Mutual Sacrifice\
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\f1 \cf2 Love grows on mutual sacrifice, and if it is truly mutual, you actually derive joy and peace by doing things for the other person. However, if only one of the person feels that he is sacrificing and the other is not doing their part, that is not mutual, it can be perilious, it often falls apart. The trouble is, quite often, both think they are making sacrifices and the other one is not doing enough. Well, well, sit down and work it out, be sensible, be realistic. Someone wrote to me once that her husband does not spend quality time with her, he does his duties but does not express his love, I asked her if she would rather have her husband quit his job and sit by her side. And I wrote to the husband asking if he preferred his job over his wife and family. They both worked it out. Wise ones. Ever wonder why it is called \'91falling\'92 in love, as opposed to rising, standing?\
The greater the common ground, more room you have to play; it increases the quality of your relationship. Love allows you to take it easy, but it punishes you for taking it for granted. It comes on an as-is basis, love is about accepting other person\'92s limitations and acknowledging your own, it is about working with each other, working for each other, working towards each other.\
Wonder what the four Ms of attachment are, of selfishness disguising as love? Me, my, myself, mine.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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\cf2 \cb1 \
Does of Prayer?\
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\cf2 \cb10 I have already written a fair bit on karma, on the law of attraction, on meditation, self transformation and so forth, as indicated in the last post, I am writing on grace and prayer today. If there is God, and if there is such a thing called Divine Grace, do you really have to do everything yourself? What is God\'92s role then? Has He just sent us on the planet to toil, to struggle, without any help from Him, has He thrown the baby out with the bathwater and thrown in the towel too. A while ago, I recorded a discourse called\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/02/what-is-god.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 What is God}}, you may want to watch it, the narrative is in English.\cb1 \
\cb10 God is the finest artist, His creation vouches for that, he may be the foremost scientist, he is certainly not a trader though. The concept of God boils down to individual belief system, he is a product of your belief, your faith, your devotion, your reverence, and if you allow me to put it, your conditioning. A Muslim, a Christian, a Buddhist, a Hindu, or any believer of any other religion, have their faith naturally inclined towards what they have been indoctrinated as God. They derive greater strength from praying to their own god.\
Before I get to praying and grace, let me just take a moment to split God into two, figuratively speaking, of course.\
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\f4 \cf9 1. With Form\
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\f1 \cf2 Followers of various religions have branded god, they have labeled him, many claim superiority of their brand over others. Some are okay to try different labels, others are fiercely, sometimes fanatically, loyal to their preferred brand. An elaborate system of religion is passed onto them as part of their upbringing and they further their faith based on their inheritance. If you look around, you will find this is how most believers or theists operate. If taking such route makes you a more compassionate person and gives you joy too, there is nothing wrong with this approach, it may even be a good approach. When you believe God has a form, it is only natural to assign certain attributes to perceive and narrate that form. As soon as we put words around any experience, others conceptualize it. Such conceptualization, intellectualization, forms the basis of misunderstanding and misinterpretation.\
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\f4 \cf9 2. The Formless\
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\f1 \cf2 Imagine you were never conditioned by your parents, your teachers, by others, in school, in shrines, what would be your concept of God? Do you think you will feel attached to your present notion of God the same way? If not, would you pray the same way? How would you perceive his presence, his grace? The formless God is an important vedic concept, this school of thought encourages a sense of oneness, of non-duality, that, everything, everyone is God, for, what has emerged from God cannot be anything short of divine either. Yogis relate their experience of\'a0
\i samadhi,\'a0
\i0 exalted state,
\i \'a0
\i0 to union with the formless.\
I reiterate, if your faith, however labeled, helps you be at peace, increases your utility to the mankind, inspires you to lead a virtuous life, you can safely stick to your belief. However, if it makes you rabid, ties you down, clips your freedom of a free thought, you may want to stop, take a deep breath, recess, and reassess your position.\
What about grace, praying, do prayers work? Keep reading.\
Scriptures adorn God with fine adjectives, mostly in superlatives, as the purest, greatest, omnipresent, omnipotent, omniscient among numerous other\'a0epithets and monikers. If He was not all these, you would not need to pray, you could bribe him, fool him, entice him. That is not possible though, how can you fool yourself, after all. He is in you, the basis of your existence. Praying is your way of self-purification, of gaining inner strength, of becoming worthy of his grace, of connecting with him. It is one of the finest paths to experience him, to thank him, to be with him. It is the path of surrender, of decimating your ego, of putting the drop back in the ocean, of offering your presence, your potency, your knowledge, your very existence to the Supreme Soul.\
Grace is his way of showing He is, it is his style of connecting with you, answering your questions, protecting you, being by your side, watching out for you. Such grace in the form of wisdom may help you to walk the noble path, in the form of blessings, it may assist you in staying course with your efforts and so on. Grace is not always getting what you desire, it rarely is that in fact, it is being exposed to what is right for you, it is helping you overcome the hurdles, to sail through the lows and remain even through the highs. Believing in the concept of grace can instill humility in you; during massive storms, a humble blade of grass remains protected, it does not get uprooted.\
Grace does not mean he can directly absolve you off your karmic duties and karmic debt. Why would he? Because you have pleased him with your fervent prayers? Can a bank manager write your loan off just because you enchant him with\'a0eulogies, with flowery words? He can give you options perhaps, he may advise you to capitalize on any possible exceptions, but not much beyond that. God is not going to stop the rain for you, he will happily give you an umbrella.\
Praying is your method of connecting with him, and Grace is his method of connecting with you. When you call and say \'91hello\'92, that is praying, when he answers back, that is grace, sometimes, he calls back later. If you insist on stopping the rain, it is merely an evidence of obstinacy, a sign that you are being selfish, not thinking about others who may need rain, it is not going to work, instead, pray for protection. If your faith is unshakeable, He will source an umbrella for you.\
In case, you are wondering about my personal position, I believe in divine grace, in God, I rejoice in both aspects of Him: with form and the formless. Regardless of the religion, when people talk to me about their religious or spiritual experiences, I feel equally joyous. If it makes you happy narrating it, it makes me happy hearing it. I have seen my deity, multiple times, I have experienced\'a0
\i samadhi
\i0 , tranquil equipoise, countless times and can slip into that state, anytime, at will. You can too if you are willing to devote time to intense meditation.\
On a lighter note, here:\
Mulla Nasrudin and his friend, devoid of food and water, had been adrift, for five days, in a dinghy in the middle of the Indian Ocean. There was no hope of survival. They prayed, they cried, they swore, nothing worked, they were counting their last, basically.\
His friend began praying one last time, \'93O Lord! I have been a terrible person my whole life, I was unfaithful to my wife, I abused others\'92 trust, I told lies, I never prayed, I cheated, I ripped people off, I spent my earnings on gambling and liquor. Please, let me live, forgive me. If you spare me now, I promise I will pray every day for the rest of my life, I will never gamble again. I will also give up\'97\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Wait a minute,\'94 interrupted Nasrudin, \'93don\'92t go too far. I think I can see a boat.\'94\
Trading and praying do not go together.\
Gratitude is a form of prayer, so is compassion, being kind is praying too as is serving his creation. Begging God is not praying to Him. A prayer in the right spirit can transform you, if your faith is firm, your prayers can yield results. That said, praying is not a substitute for the right karma, virtuous living, righteous conduct, it is not an escape route.\
The easiest way to experience His grace is to be childlike, to live in the moment; watch a toddler who has just graduated out of infancy to know what I mean.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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\cf2 \cb1 \
Mass Destruction of Karma\
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\cf2 \cb10 A few readers wrote to me with similar questions. They wanted to know the role of karma, what place it has in the events of mass destruction and natural calamities like earthquakes, tsunami, hurricanes, in war, in genocide, in plane crashes, in the case of massacres and so forth. Let me share my point of view on this.\
As I wrote earlier, I do not believe that the law of karma is your answer to everything, every occurrence. It is possible to retrofit theories, to force a square peg in a round hole and cover the gaps with some adhesive creating the illusion of a perfect fit, it will only offer temporary consolation, short-lived solace.\
Before I address your question, it is important to remember that it is conditioned mind alone that asks questions, the conscious mind coated by conditioning, it rejoices in calculations, in analysis, in exploration, it thrives on curiosity, it feeds on inquisitiveness. Not that anything is wrong with that, in fact, it is this very human trait that helped our race to surprise ourselves, to amaze ourselves, to rule all the other races, whether that is good or bad, is up to individual\'a0interpretation. Consider the following:\
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\f4 \cf9 1. The Questioning Mind\
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\f1 \cf2 Imagine, on the one side, having a mind that is endlessly asking questions, the same mind is addressing them, fielding them, dodging and answering them. That is probably how human intellect has developed over millions of years. It is like giving clay to a child, he keeps on creating different forms till the charm remains and then he moulds all figurines back into a ball and leaves it aside. He may repeat the process till he grows out of it, till he is fascinated no more, till he gets another toy. Similarly, your conscious mind keeps you busy, it wants to keep you fascinated, keep you engaged. It gets tiring after a while. Just like physical matter, mental matter can neither be created nor destroyed, it can only ever be transformed. Intellectual satisfaction from one theory today may give way to another philosophy tomorrow.\'a0Einstein put it aptly, \'93You can\'92t solve a problem with the same mind that created it.\'94\
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\f4 \cf9 2. The Quiet Mind\
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\f1 \cf2 Now, on the other side, imagine a mind that is diving in an infinite ocean of bliss, it has gone quiet. It is alert, conscious, super conscious in fact, but it is not bogging you down with endless questions about some philosophy, some abstract theory you want to plug into tangible thesis; instead, it keeps you focused, your energies channelized, escalating your awareness to an entirely new level. Your most profound answers will emerge from a state of quietude. In a state of quiescence, you start to understand what is important to know versus what is more relevant, your answers will no longer produce more questions, and more answers and more questions and so on. It will come to a stop. You have to experience that state to know what I mean. I can only show the path, your deliverance depends on you alone. It does not come from scavenging second-hand knowledge, it comes from a dawning of inner wisdom, it is the outcome of quieting your mind so you may see the real you. It is easier to see what lies beneath the clear water when it is still.\
I encourage you to tread the path of attaining quietude to experience a constant flow of bliss, you will get all the answers, more importantly, you will get all the right questions.\
Onto your question now; let me segregate it into two parts:\
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\f4 \cf9 1. Natural Calamities\
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\f1 \cf2 Our planet has developed its own coping mechanism, an evolving ecosystem, a sustentative cycle, it is not dependent on the human race for its sustenance, and as such, does not see us any more important than an ant. It does not reason like us, if it did, we would be long gone. Acts of nature are simply corrective measures it takes to maintain its existence. Whether that involves spewing fire by erupting mountains through volcanic actions, or earthquakes to cast off the anomalies, it does so indiscriminately. Like the dog that shakes off water after bath, like the snake that sheds its old skin, Nature renews, realigns, rejuvenates itself.\
There is a natural order to most things, when butter is brought next to heat, it melts, wonderful it is, it is not an act of grace or grief. For example, there may be no media coverage, no sense of loss, if a hurricane hits an abandoned island and no one is hurt, for, no one lived there. Explorers may seek answers, reasons, from an ecological, geological perspective, it is highly unlikely anyone will approach it through some esoteric philosophy, religion, through arcane laws. Predominantly because, a sense of attachment is missing.\'a0However, if the same incident takes place in a densely populated coastal area causing casualties, we start searching for an answer in religion, in philosophy, in divination and so forth. You may agree to disagree, but all religions, bar none, are mere philosophies; actionable items are called rituals. Great spiritual leaders passed on their wisdom and followers shaped it into religions.\
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\f4 \cf9 2. Handmade Disasters\
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\f1 \cf2 If I have my facts straight, every minute, more than two hundred fifty people die on earth. It is accepted as normal, it is standard mortality rate, they say. However, when a couple of hundred die in a plane crash, or, lot many in war, in crimes against humanity, we label this as abnormal; absolutely, it is. Yet, just because the scale is bigger, or because the act is concentrated, it does not mean there is an all-encompassing intellectual proposition to feed a satisfactory explanation. Searching for answers in a religious theory or some cosmopolitan philosophy is just as abnormal.\
Behind most wars, most crimes, lies misguided human spirit of competition, of misplaced emotions, of misdirected energies, such heinous acts remain eternally hideous, driven by greed for power, for lucre, for position, they are commissioned to satisfy ego, lust, they are murky acts of glorified ignorance, unmistakable signs of a barbaric mind.\
Since, we have an evolved intellect, how flattering, we like to give ourselves importance, somehow we feel that Nature, God, others, the world, must owe us something. We believe everything must have a meaning, our life, our death, every incident, every phase, every occurrence, has to be supported by some intelligent answer to appease the insatiable curiosity of the conditioned mind. There may be theories, scientific basis, cause-and-effect and what have you, that does not mean there is an absolute reason. Whenever anything undesirable happens, we want an answer, because most of us have been conditioned to believe that if you worship God, if you pray, nothing bad can happen; you derive your own truth from that.\
So, where does that leave us in terms of praying, divine grace and God? Do they mean anything? Of course, they do. Can they help you? You bet. I will cover it in the near future, if not in the next post.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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\cf2 \cb1 \
Destiny and Free Will\
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\cf2 \cb10 A common argument is, one should have faith in God, He will do the needful, things will happen only when they are destined and so on and so forth. Does that imply everything is predestined, preordained? And if it is so, what is the need to do any karma? What is the truth: destiny or free will? There is no doubt, from where I see it, that destiny plays an important role. Before I dig deeper, let me narrate a story to you:\
Once upon a time, a man, in search of livelihood, on his way to another town had to pass through a jungle. It so happened that he lost his way in the woods. Roaming helplessly, he came across an old banyan tree, its roots hung low and it canopied a wide area. He saw a fox sitting under the tree. At first, he got scared, thereafter, relieved, for, he noticed that it was lame, an old fox, mostly disabled, unable to hunt.\
He sat there in a shady corner. What he witnessed a while later amazed him, he observed birds who sat on the tree occasionally dropped pieces of meat and the fox fed on them. That was how it survived. It dawned on the man that there was no need for him to run around, that, he too, like the fox, could just take up a corner somewhere, God would provide for him too.\
Subsequently, he managed to navigate his way out of the forest and parked himself, under a tree, outside the first village he came across. He vowed to surrender to God and only live off what was offered to him. Only that, days went by and no one offered him anything. He was starving, at the verge of collapsing. His faith shook, just short of shattering, and he wondered how could God be partial, how come he provided for the fox and not him.\
While he was engrossed in his own world, he saw a\'a0
\i sannyasin
\i0 , mystic, pass by. In his frail condition, he called out for the mystic, narrated his story, his predicament, and put him the question that bothered him. The monk chuckled, and said, \'93Who told you to take on the role of the fox? Are you lame? Disabled? You should be the bird, working for yourself as well as providing for those who depend on you.\'94\
The anecdote has two morals, one, we cannot pick and choose roles as per our own convenience, we have to be pragmatic, realistic, honest with ourselves, and two, surrendering to God or having faith in Him does not mean we cease to make an effort.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 So, what role does destiny play? \
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\f2 \cf3 \cb1 \
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\f1 \cf2 \cb10 Hence: There are five constituents that comprise an action. The execution of a karma is not solely dependent on any one factor. Support (or approach or motive or influence or environment), doer, resources, effort and destiny are the five elements.\
Interestingly, in the aforesaid verses, destiny is labeled as\'a0
\i daivam
\i0 , divine grace, not\'a0
\i bhagya
\i0 , plain fate. The one who puts in a sincere effort, becomes a worthy recipient of grace. Non attainment of your goals is not always failure, giving up, may well be.\
Destiny plays an important role, it is no more than twenty percent though. If you operate in the right environment, conducive to your karma, tap into the resources required to execute your plan, stay persistent, your plans will materialize before long. No one has won lotto without being in possession of a ticket first, whether it was bought or gifted, regardless. This world, the whole universe operates on an interdependent phenomenon, it is interlinked, every action you perform can have far reaching implications, almost like the butterfly effect where a small change, a slight modification, in a complex system can completely alter the final outcome.\
If you are serious about attaining your goal(s), you have to operate in the right environment; you cannot practice swimming in a desert. When you engage in a relentless pursuit, in a supporting environment, your chances of gaining access to the right resources increase automatically. A little is left thereafter.\
A wonderful Italian devotee, an engineer by profession, asked me once, \'93Why is it that spirituality flourished in India? How come it is home to some of the greatest spiritual leaders in the world?\'94\
To answer, I asked her a question in return, \'93Why is it that start-ups prosper in Silicon Valley? How come it is home to some of the finest tech companies in the world?\'94\
When you make an explicit attempt to address the four elements above, the fifth one, destiny, makes way for you. Your chances of being at the right place at the right time go up significantly.\
What about those who seem to get it easy, who seem to be an exception to the guidelines above? Well, whether you want to try your luck in the tiny subset of exceptions, hoping good things will just happen, or you wish to act in the large playground of norms, working towards attracting the desirable, that is your personal choice; be sensible.\
To fellow Indians, at home and abroad, I wish you a Happy Independence day.\

\i Vande mataram,\'a0
\i0 \cf13 all glories, my obeisances to the motherland.\cf2 \cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\
Karma of four Types\
Let me elucidate further the theory, the law of karma. Today, I shall go over the four types of karma as captured in various vedic texts. As always, I may offer you scriptural definitions, the exposition remains my personal opinion, it may be a deviation from what is known already.A while ago, I wrote about the three types of karma and how it leaves an imprint on your being, a karmic trail if you will. That was from the angle of execution of any karma, be it a mental, physical or verbal one. You can read up more on that\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2011/12/mind-karmic-trail-and-psychic-imprints.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 here}}. The classification hereunder is of four types, it is about the realization of such imprints. As follows:\
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\f4 \cf9 1.\'a0
\i Prarabdha
\i0 , matured, Karma\
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\f1 \cf2 Imagine a fruit, an apple, on a tree. It has come of its age, it is ripe. Either it be plucked in time or it detaches itself from the tree and lands on the ground. It cannot remain on the tree forever. Similarly,\'a0
\i pr\uc0\u257 rabdha\'a0
\i0 is ripe karma. At some point in time, you planted a tree and the fruit is ready to drop today. Regardless of your desire or your preference, it has taken its own course, much like the arrow that has left the bow. Once you perform any karmic act, it is registered in the universe, it will come to fruition in due course. There is no escape. Whatever you are going through in life presently, note the word presently, that you have no control over, it is your\'a0
\i pr\uc0\u257 rabdha
\i0 . It does not mean you cannot change your future.\'a0
\i Pr\uc0\u257 rabdha\'a0
\i0 is that which has matured. Any karma that may mature in the future is not\'a0
\i pr\uc0\u257 rabdha
\i0 , it falls under the second category:\
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\f4 \cf9 2.\'a0
\i Sanchita
\i0 , stored, Karma\
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\f1 \cf2 This is your store of karma. Not all fruits on the tree will mature the same day, it will be laden again in the next season and the next and so forth. It is for this reason that life is greatly cyclical for an overwhelming majority of people. Why? If you planted apple trees, when the season comes you will have plenty of it, and, if you planted wild berries, however attractive, thorny bushes, however protective, they will flourish too during their seasons. It is often the case why problems rarely come singly, they come in hordes, so do good times. There is something unique about\'a0
\i sancita\'a0
\i0 karma, it can be changed! If you can go to the source of your apples or baneberries, you can choose to nurture them or destroy them altogether. The key is going to the source.\
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\f4 \cf9 3. A
\i gami
\i0 , forthcoming, Karma\
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\f1 \cf2 Imagine you entered the apple garden. You performed a karma, you exercised a choice, forced or voluntary, regardless. Based on this karma, you are bound to perform certain such other karmas as sighting of the apple trees, experiencing the fragrance, and a definitive karma of exiting the orchard is also waiting to mature. The importance of this karma cannot be underestimated or overstated. The choices you make today have a direct bearing on your future tomorrow, what you do in the present moment determines what unfolds in the next.\'a0
\i \uc0\u256 g\u257 m\u299 \'a0
\i0 karma is a mandatory karma, you have little choice, if any. If you have entered the orchard, you will have to perform the action of exiting as well, sooner or later. However, if you could either change the store of your\'a0
\i sancita\'a0
\i0 karma or exercise due care in the present one, this one changes automatically. And how can one change\'a0
\i sancita\'a0
\i0 karma? Continue reading.\
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\f4 \cf9 4.\'a0
\i Vartamana
\i0 , present, Karma\
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\f1 \cf2 It is also known as\'a0
\i kriyam\uc0\u257 \u7751 a
\i0 , actionable, present karma, the one that is being done. There is another term, perhaps better, called\'a0
\i puru\uc0\u7779 \u257 rtha
\i0 , effort, karma. Let us assume you no longer want apples. You can chop the trees, you can have them uprooted. You will still have to find a way to manage or dispose off the wood, rotting apples, green waste and the rest of it, but it is a one off, albeit intense, effort. Thereafter, there will be no more fruits waiting for you year after year. You may simply choose to sow wheat and harvest after a few months, clearing your karmic field on a regular basis.\
A pertinent question is how do you know if you are creating new karma or going through the results of your past karma? The answer is quite simple, when you do something out of choice, you are creating new karma, and, when you are forced to do something, you are simply repaying your karmic debt. The former will have the consequences, good or bad, drawn up for you, the latter can be tended by managing your karmic store or\'a0
\i sanchita\'a0
\i0 karma in other words.\
In essence, I am suggesting that you can bring change into your life, you can affect the desired change, provided you are patient and persistent. So, can you become the next Bill Gates or the next Buddha, well, you are mistaking change for a\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/06/setting-goals-and-achieving-them.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 goal}}. That said, if you can travel back in time and build an operating system like Bill Gates did, think like he did, act like he did, when he did, you will become another Bill Gates. If you can relinquish like Buddha did, engage in intense practice the way he did, in the manner he did, for the time he did, you will become Buddha. Bill Gates became Bill because he chose not to become an IBM or an Apple, he stayed true to his own vision, his own design. Buddha became Buddha because he pursued his own path, he chose not to become like some other preacher or sage, he chose to discover himself, his own work and he became Buddha.\
Your fulfillment is not going to come from becoming another Bill or another Buddha, it is going to come from creating your own home. However welcome you may be in another home, however hospitable your host may be, a while later, you no longer feel at home. You only feel at home in your own home. You may have ideals or idols, but it is important to be yourself, to discover yourself, your own truth.\
The choices you made yesterday, voluntary or otherwise, have landed you where you are today, and the choices you are making today will dictate your tomorrow. Hence, it is paramount that you pay attention to your present actions, your present thoughts, the range of choices available in the future is a direct function, a derivative of your present actions, your future, well, your life in fact, depends on it.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\
Your Karmic Account\
Let me share with you the concept of karmic account. A nice little story is a natural start for me. Here:\cb1 \
\cb10 In a small village once, everyone was indebted, materially. Its people earned their livelihood based on local trade. The farmer would buy on credit and pay the supplier upon harvest, the supplier would source on credit and clear his dues when he got his payment and so on. Everyone owed someone, basically. There was a hotel in that village, more like a motel. One day, a rich merchant from a nearby town visited them. He thought of staying the night there. He went to the hotel and insisted on seeing the room before checking in. The manager agreed and informed him that he would require a security deposit of one hundred dollars. And that, if he chose not to take the room, his deposit would be returned. The merchant saw no harm and put a hundred dollar bill on the counter. The manager called a bell boy to show a room on the top floor to the gentleman.\
Barely had they started moving towards the room when the manager took the bill and ran out of the hotel. He went to the nearby convenience store and paid his outstanding dues of one hundred dollars and returned to the hotel. Further, the store owner rushed to the farmer and cleared his debt of the same amount. The farmer owed money to a private banker, so without ado, he ran to the lender and paid back his long overdue loan. The lender owed a prostitute and he quickly got rid of his debt by forwarding the payment. The prostitute, in turn, owed the hotel for she had once used a room for her trade. To protect her reputation, she ran to the hotel, paid the manager, thanked him and went her way. By that time, the merchant came down and told him the room was not up to his standard. The manager handed back the hundred dollar bill and the merchant left.\
No one pocketed anything but the whole village became debt free. Everyone was relieved of their stress, their loans and debts.\
Similarly, in the whole scheme of things, in the play of nature, the bottom line does not change, the grand total remains the same regardless of the volume and nature of individual transactions.\
If you have accumulated a certain debt, it is you alone who has to pay it back. Let us say, a certain bank manager is your best friend and you need chips. You cannot approach him with the argument that he has millions in his bank and therefore he should lend you some money, from someone\'92s account, from anyone\'92s account. Even if he wants, he cannot do it.\
Nature cannot give you what you have not earned just like it cannot take away from you what is rightfully parked in your account. It is impartial. You need to deposit before you can withdraw. What you do with your life, your actions is entirely your own responsibility. Each individual has a separate karmic account, it is immaculately maintained, there are no mistakes there. If you give someone grief because that is what they give you, it does not cancel out your transaction. You both remain accountable for your actions on an individual basis.\
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{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/06/the-law-of-attraction.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 The law of attraction}}\'a0and the law of karma may well operate in tandem, but it is possible for one to do bad karma yet still excel at attracting good things. The reverse is also true \'97 one may be a wonderful person and may still attract terrible things in life. Good or bad, that does not absolve him off his karmic debt, it does not get written off. It is dealt with separately by Nature. It is for this reason that sometimes who you may call bad, they continue to flourish till their last breath. They can attract desired things in life.\
Good karma may or may not give you success as you define it, it may not give you a life of material richness and glamour, but, without fail, it will certainly reward you with peace and contentment. In fact, you can only do good karma when you are at peace within. If you are happy inside, you will not hurt anyone with your words or gestures, you will only see beauty in everything and you will only melt their hearts doing even more good karma. If you are bitter inside, if you are angry, you will find it increasingly hard to heal yourself. Like the wounded lion or frightened snake, you may only end up causing more grief to the other person, resulting in even greater anguish for yourself. Happiness and good karma complement and fuel each other.\
So, if peace is important to you, just know that it is funded by your karmic account. The greater the balance, more the peace. It is in a state of peace alone that one experiences any type of joy. Ultimately, why do most people work, go on vacations, dine outside, live a lavish life, wish for comforts? To enjoy, right? To be happy, to be at ease with themselves, with those around them, with the world.\
If you are happy to shed off some of your expectations, desires, if you are willing to be a little more forgiving, a bit more honest with yourself and others, you will find yourself at peace. If you can maintain that state under all circumstances, that will be self-realization. In that exalted state, you transcend all theoretical and intellectual propositions, your mind goes quiet and you experience an inexplicable flow of bliss. I say this from first-hand experience.\
With peace and contentment as your armor, mindfulness and nobility being your mount, you win naturally, good karma happens effortlessly. You are a product of your thoughts, emotions and karma. You can work on any one of these, the other two align automatically.\
How do you work on these? Well, I have already covered that over the past few months. For better aid, I am segregating my posts and putting them in short e-books. They will be available for free download shortly. In the next post, I will expound on the four types of karma.\
What they do with their body, mind and life is their business. Your karmic transactions are your responsibility. It helps to mind your own business, especially if it is a sole\'a0proprietorship\'a0\'97\'a0the only permissible ownership structure in the law of karma.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\
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\cf2 \cb1 The Law of Karma\
Once upon a time, there was a scientist called Theordy. He had a theory behind every phenomenon. He was exceptional at logic, trigonometry, and physics. He could solve complex equations in his head, he could look at the shadow of a tall structure and ascertain its height in a matter of seconds, he understood the whys and hows behind the complex workings of things. One day, he visited his friend who was an artist. His friend showed him his recent works of art, they were beautiful pictures of flora and fauna, of landscapes, of sunrises and sunsets. Theordy was gripped with awe, with inexplicable joy looking at those paintings. He asked his friend, how could he draw such magnificent paintings, how did he manage to express emotions using lines and colors, that, what was the logic, the scientific basis behind his amazing work?\
\
The artist explained to Theordy that it took him years of practice, that, he simply painted on the canvas the beauty he saw outside, the feelings he felt inside. There was no more logic to it than that. Theordy argued that if one mixed same quantity of red and yellow, it would produce the same orange every time. He suggested that if one drew straight lines at certain angles, they would always take the same shape. He gave other intelligent reasons to his friend and ultimately arrived at the conclusion that there must be some theory and logic behind his artwork, explanation, he felt, that was outside the comprehension of the artist. His friend told him that art was a matter of expression and not argument, a work of heart and not mathematical calculation, that surely there was some scientific basis but that art always took a different form, beyond equations and logic.Theordy remained unconvinced, and his friend, unmoved.\
I am addressing an important subject today: Karma. My inbox is inundated with questions around that, seekers wanting to know about the law of karma, that why did Jews go through the suffering they did, what is the fault of those who die in a natural calamity, why are some children born disabled, why do some die early and so forth. Painful questions.\
I believe in rebirth, and this belief is based on my direct experiences in deep meditative state. Could my experiences be subjective? Of course, they are. All experiences are subjective and interdependent. I believe in the law of karma and I believe that not even in a million years the slightest of karma is lost. However, I do not believe in pansophy, an absolute philosophy, I do not believe that one theory could be the answer to everything. If it was all mathematical, nature, earth, planets, universe would not be what it is today. Math could not measure the universe, so they labeled it infinite, they discover one particle today and name it God particle, and twenty years later they will discover another entity and they may label it the Supreme God particle or whatever. I do not deny the contribution of science towards material progress, and I am certainly not labeling it good or bad either.\
So, the question is not why do bad things happen to good people or the other way, the question is why must there be a universal theory to provide an answer that will fit your frame of understanding, of comprehension, of conditioning? We are looking for absoluteness, we are looking for absolute proofs, we want just one answer, it feels easy that way. Theordy will keep searching for logic in art. Why must Nature operate on mathematical equations? Consider the following:\
Two identical seeds are sowed in the ground. They are nurtured the same way. One sprouts and the other one perishes. Why? The other seed may have perished on its face value, but has it really? The decomposing seed is actually the food for millions of microorganisms, it is making the ground fertile, it is supporting an ecosystem just as ably as the one that sprouted, albeit in a different manner. Duality arises when we label decomposition of the seed as failure and sprouting as success.\
I believe in God, in Nature, in that mystical dimension. It is outrageously beautiful and profound. I have experienced it first-hand, that is the basis of my belief. Yes, He can have a form based on your own beliefs; I have seen it multiple times so I believe it. However, I do not believe that God is up there carving some cunning designs or executing some sinister plans to harm or benefit a certain set of people, that, there is a God who gets upset if you do not follow a certain religion, or that He will grace you with the riches of the world if He is pleased with you. He would no longer be God if He was partial and biased. I believe in Grace but I do not believe that it is based on mere performance of rituals or adherence to a certain religion. It may not be without cause-and-effect, it mostly remains a work of art though.\
Should we then reject the karmic law as outdated, outlandish and fantastical? No. That will be the equal side of foolishness, of short-sightedness. I shall try and elucidate the theory of karmic account and how it applies to individuals in the near future, if not in the next post. But, please do not apply theories of microeconomics to make sense of macro-phenomena. If we persist with any proposition, we will arrive at some conclusion obviously. The folly is to accept that conclusion just because it offers you consolation, some justification. Theordy\'92s ability to find an equation in a painting does not mean he has figured out the work of art.\
To understand certain aspects, you have to be an artist, to comprehend others, you need to be the scientist. Whether you are drawing landscapes or erecting buildings, just so long you are at peace, you must be doing something noble. How would you lead your life if no one ever told you anything about God or religion? Imagine that a group of one thousand infants is dropped on another inhabitable planet with provisions and many survive somehow. How would they grow up, what would be their beliefs, their morals, their religion?\
I could have expounded on the word of certain scriptures to address your question, I could have offered you some convincing theory, a lofty philosophy, a logical explanation, some fitting thesis, but that is not the way of Swami. I am committed to truth above everything else. I would rather have you ask right questions through self-inquiry than accept my answers through secondary analysis.\
The act of turning inward is the art of breaking free of layers of conditioning, it is the science of understanding one\'92s true nature, experiencing your primordial state. It helps you transcend the labels. Your realization is going to come from contemplation and not conditioning, reflection and not rituals, practice and not preaching. Whether you are Theordy or the artist, be at peace, be yourself, be fearless.\
Understanding without experience is dry and experience without understanding is blind. Go on, discover your own truth! That alone will set you free.\
Peace.\uc0\u8232 Swami\
\
A meaningful life\
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\cf2 \cb10 I spent my last week exploring the Himalayas. The goal was to identify a suitable place for my upcoming stint of solitude. I hired a car to take me around. The driver was the owner himself. He was a sober guy and a staunch follower of the religion he practiced, staunch because his only collection of music was gospel and recitations of his holy book.\
The moment I sat in the car his favorite music was already playing, I smiled and I maintained it for longer than usual. Thereafter, I shed some light on the esoteric meaning of certain verses of his scripture. This encouraged him beyond a reasonable limit and consequently, for the next few days that is all he played. I politely asked him if we could occasionally listen to the hills and the vales, the cool breeze and the snowy peaks, the rivers and the waterfalls too. He was kind enough to turn off the music and I enjoyed listening to the silence. I really believe religion is hard-wired, hopefully not hot-wired, in human psyche.\
This gentleman was sixty years old he told me. He left home when he was nine. For many years he worked in a factory as a machine operator. He still does not own a home, he is five installments away from paying off his only car, his livelihood. After paying off his monthly installment, rent and groceries, he is practically left with nothing. However, he possessed two outstanding qualities, one, he carried himself really well, he almost dressed like a manager in some traditional corporate and two, he was generally quite positive.\
\'93I\'92ve no complaints,\'94 he said, \'93but there\'92s a thought that bothers me a great deal. I feel I\'92ve wasted my entire life without attaining anything significant. My whole life I worked menial jobs and till date I\'92ve not made any contribution to my religion, society or the country. Is this how life supposed to be? Will my death be as obscure as my life? What bad karma did I do in my past life to have a life like this?\'94\
I paused for a few seconds to appreciate the depth of his thought before saying, \'93You know, a machine has many parts, big and small. It has many cogs of various sizes. The tiniest cog is as important as the largest. Regardless of the size, malfunctioning of any one part can bring the whole machine to a halt. Now, if the biggest cog thinks it\'92s the most special or the chosen one, it\'92s merely its own ego and false pride. For it to be useful, it is just as dependent on the smaller ones as vice-versa. A machine can\'92t run on big cogs alone. All of them have a role to play. Similarly, your job is as important as anyone else\'92s. The magnitude may seem to differ compared to, let\'92s say, a leader or a politician but the importance doesn\'92t. Any chain is as strong as its weakest link. So, to the universe, you are just as somebody as anybody. Who would have shown me around if you wouldn\'92t be in the job you are in?\'94\
A drop of tear appeared in the corner of his eye and marched for a downward trek before quickly disappearing in his beard. \'93It\'92s the first time in my life I\'92m feeling warm inside, I\'92m feeling very contented.\'94 Translated, these were his exact words.\
Later on he told me something most extraordinary: \'93I was firm about remaining a bachelor. But a few years ago I married a younger woman who was in great trouble. She had some anomaly because of which she could not have kids. She had no parents and she lived with her sister and brother-in-law who treated her badly. So, I married her,\'94 he continued, \'93and five years ago, I adopted a girl child. At that time, her whole back was excessively sun burnt, as if she had skin cancer. She was only 45 days old. I took her to my God and placed her there and prayed for her. In fifteen days she was totally cured.\'94 Emotions in the form of tears were liberally expressing themselves in his eyes by now.\
He, like any other parent, enthusiastically narrated glories of his daughter before quoting the following conversation:\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93She\'92s only five but one day she said, \'91Papa, when I grow up, I\'92ll become a doctor and I\'92ll take you to London.\'92\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 But I\'92m a poor man and what if I can\'92t pay for your education.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'91That\'92s no problem. I\'92ll teach other younger kids and make money and pay for everything.\'92\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 I was startled at my daughter\'92s wisdom,\'94 he said.\
\'93Will I be there when she goes to college? Will I be able to pay for her education? I don\'92t have a lot of years left, who will provide for her after I\'92m gone?\'94 he added, \'93sometimes, I can\'92t sleep when I think about these questions and then I pray to God and leave everything in his hands.\'94 All this while, mini tear-falls continued to silently trickle down his cheeks; men generally cry quietly.\
I checked my sentiments by holding back my own tears and pacified him too, for, you can imagine what chance does a car have of staying on the road if both the driver and passenger start crying! I\'92m skipping some details for the sake of brevity. Humor aside, my heart melted like butter on a hot plate. I made him a promise and he started sniveling, almost soft sobs.\
I told him he is better than ninety-nine percent of the people I meet, that, his contribution to the society is far greater than most out there, that, this world is only worth living because of people like him, and that he will never be without food, shelter, clothing or medication. The providence cannot afford to not look after someone like him.\
It is a long post already but I wish to share two key lessons. First, anyone\'92s work is as important as anyone else\'92s. Second, you really do not need to have a lot to be able to give, you just need the heart. If you are reading this post, it probably means you have a computer with internet access, you can perhaps afford to take care of your basic needs. You are already in the top twenty percent of world\'92s population. There are hundreds of millions out there who work painfully hard for a pittance, they consider themselves lucky to just have a square meal when the sun goes down. Many do not fall asleep because they are in cozy beds or because their stomach is full, they do so because their body can remain awake no longer, because this is the only way to forget about hunger of the stomach, harshness of the world, to give a temporary rest to their endless suffering before morning sounds scornfully play to their ears, before hard reality caresses their eyelids exposing them to another day of hunger, impoverishment and lacking.\
When your existence helps someone else, in any which way possible, your life could not be more meaningful, it could not be more\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/09/are-you-important.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf12 important}}, your contribution could not be any greater.\
Be grateful. Give and ye shall receive.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\cb1 \
A crazy world\
\cb10 How do you find living in this world? Hard, alright, great, worthwhile? Or maybe you have not had the time to sit down and reflect on it. It is a mad world, it may be maddeningly beautiful at times or beautifully maddening sometimes, it remains a mad world. Perhaps, that is what makes it unique, evolutionary, beautiful. It feels inevitable and necessary. The funny thing is, the height of its craziness, the depth of its madness remains concealed to the one who is busy being a part of it.\
Once upon a time, there was a king. As was the tradition, he consulted the royal astrologer at the beginning of the new year. The astrologer examined the charts and expressed great concern. He informed the king of a perilous year ahead, that, anyone eating grains, beans or any produce at all from his kingdom would go mad.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Naturally, the king was perturbed. \'93This is truly worrying,\'94 he said, \'93what will happen to the people going mad? How long will this madness last?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Your Majesty,\'94 said the astrologer, \'93when hit by the affliction, people will start copying each other, forever going around in circles. This will get passed from one generation to the next. There\'92s no remedy.\'94\
The king sent for his chief minister, who was known for his intelligence and wisdom. He shared with him the predictions by the astrologer. He asked his minister if he could find a way to avoid the malady. The minister deliberated for a while and said with as much sadness as enthusiasm, \'93We have enough existing stock in the granary for both of us. It can easily last us three years. You cannot afford to go mad because you have to rule and I should not go crazy because I am your adviser. So, if we keep our sanity intact by not eating this year\'92s harvest, we can figure out a solution in due course.\'94\
\'93That won\'92t be fair,\'94 said the king, \'93how can I let everyone in the state go mad while I protect myself! Can you imagine how hard it\'92s gonna be to manage so many mad people? Instead, let\'92s feed ourselves like all my subjects. That way we\'92ll go mad too. And then it wouldn\'92t really matter. If we become like everyone else, we\'92ll neither be able to notice their madness nor will it bother us. But, both of us should also tattoo on our arms that we are mad. This will remind us that one day we have to return to sanity.\'94\
I hope you know what I mean. The way our world functions, it appears normal. That is primarily because everyone is eating off the same crop, it is not necessarily a sign of extraordinary intelligence. However, you would not know the reality till you pay attention to the tattoo, the reminder. Every now and then, life gives you a reminder, a wakeup call. Some listen to it and balance their lives between duties and desires, many choose to ignore it.\
Life can feel like flowing water, it is just happening, passing, too reflexive, automatic. Most people do not know why they are doing what they are doing, who has taught them right from wrong and on what basis, what is the source of their knowledge, who has created the operating model they are following? Often, all it takes is a pause, a break, a little bit of contemplation to see trees from woods.\
Once G.I. Gurdjieff, a magnificent Russian thinker, instructed his disciple P.D. Ouspensky to observe silence and live in complete solitude for three months. After Ouspensky did so, he took him to the market. Ouspensky felt overwhelmed and lost. He said to Gurdjieff, \'93I feel this is a mad world. Mad people are selling widgets and the mad are buying. Mad ones are driving buses and the mad are riding. The mad are talking to the mad. This is one big madhouse. Please take me back, I can\'92t stand the crowd.\'94\
I can tell you from my own experience that spending time in silence and\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/01/ekanta-the-practice-of-solitude.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 solitude\'a0}}is one the greatest gifts you can give to yourself. I promise you will never be able to look at the world the same way. After I had spent months in extreme Himalayan solitude, it took me many months to adjust in the \'93normal\'94 world. A powerful transformation cleanses you, envelopes you and changes you for good. Why? Because solitude gives you that break to reflect, to contemplate, to assimilate and much more; you understand yourself better.\
If they call you crazy, it may just be them! Be yourself. Discover your own truth.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\cb1 \
A problem or inconvenience \
\cb10 A man in search of truth ended up at the monastery of a sage. He prostrated before the master and requested refuge. The sage told him he was happy to initiate him but there were certain rules the disciple would have to obey.\'94I want you to practice silence,\'94 the master said, \'93Therefore, you are only allowed to speak once every twelve years, only one sentence of no more than five words.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The disciple readily agreed. For twelve years he tried to meditate and eagerly waited for his opportunity to speak.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Bed is too hard,\'94 he said to his guru at the first opportunity after twelve years.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Hmm\'85\'94 the master grumbled.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Another twelve years went by in silence and the disciple complained, \'93Food is too cold.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Hmm\'85\'94 said the master.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The disciple felt angry but he did not want to break the rule. He meditated for another twelve years and said, \'93I\'92m leaving.\'94 Exceeding the limit of five words, he continued, \'93This is rubbish. I haven\'92t gained anything, I haven\'92t learned anything, you haven\'92t taught me anything.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Good! Be gone,\'94 the master replied, \'93all I have heard you do in the last thirty-six years is complain, complain, complain! If silence couldn\'92t teach you what else can,\'a0from who else can you learn\'a0if you couldn\'92t learn from life?\'94\
Putting aside the humor, this anecdote may sound extreme but it is not far from the reality of the lives of many people. A bulk of the emails I get are around people going through problems, most who come to see me are somehow unhappy. They are complaining about life, others, about things, circumstances, about situations. While in the story above, the disciple spoke only three times, in every likelihood he complained in his head a million times more. I call this cerebral complaining. Many do this all the time, they are almost always complaining in their mind, even in their dreams.\
I am reminded of a great story by Robert Fulghum. During his early twenties he used to work for a countryside resort. He had to do the night shift as a receptionist and mind the stables during the day. The owner was not the most likable or the kindest person on the planet and Robert was getting weary of eating the same lunch everyday. In addition, the cost of the lunch would get deducted from his paycheck. It got on his nerves.\
One night, he could hold it no longer, especially when he found out that the same lunch was going to be served for another couple of days. One of his colleagues, working as a night auditor, was Sigmund Wollman, a German Jewish guy. A survivor of Auschwitz, Sigmund had spent three years at the concentration camp. He was happy and contented in the same hotel where Robert was mad and upset. Finding no one else around to share his frustration, Robert spoke to Sigmund and expressed his anger against the hotel owner, he was mad because of eating the same food day-in-day-out and for having to pay for it. Worked up, he was really crossed. Sigmund, however, listened patiently before saying:\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Lissen, Fulchum, Lissen me, lissen me. You know what\'92s wrong with you? It\'92s not the food and it\'92s not the boss and it\'92s not this job.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93So what\'92s wrong with me?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Fulchum, you think you know everything but you don\'92t know the difference between an inconvenience and a problem. If you break your neck, if you have nothing to eat, if your house is on fire \'97 then you\'92ve got a problem. Everything else is an inconvenience. Life is inconvenient. Life is lumpy.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Robert Fulghum had a realization and he further wrote in his story, \'93I think of this as the Wollman Test of Reality. Life is lumpy. And a lump in the porridge, a lump in the throat and a lump in the breast are not the same lump. One should learn the difference.\'94\
It is important to get real if you want to make the best of your life. You can keep complaining or you can start living. They say life is ninety percent how you take it and ten percent how you make it. It is easy, perhaps even natural and normal that you hold others responsible for what all is not right in your life, but it will not take you anywhere, such an approach will not solve your problems, it will not ease your concerns. Do not wait for someone else to take charge of your life. Analyze yourself, know yourself, treat yourself with care, love yourself. While you may have responsibilities, do not be afraid of living for yourself too. All of that is possible only when you take ownership of your life, when you take responsibility of the choices you make in life.\
Understand yourself so you can get comfortable with yourself, life will not feel so inconvenient thereafter. If you cannot make yourself happy, how can you reasonably expect others to make you happy? You alone hold the key to your happiness. Be free, be fearless.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
How to celebrate\
The other day a noble one wrote to me with a beautiful question, she said, \'93As most people around the world are busy shopping for gifts and/or busy increasing sales before the year end, what do you do? I am asking because I am curious how you would spend welcoming 2013 or any \'93new\'94 year.\'94\
Some others have asked me similar questions in person. Before I shed light on how do I celebrate, let me share my thoughts on celebration:\
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\f4 \cf9 What and why do we celebrate?\
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\f1 \cf2 Celebrating occasions by throwing parties is only one type of celebration, it is in fact conditional celebration. If one was not so deeply programmed by the society, religion and corporations, most would celebrate differently I believe. Individuals celebrate vacations, corporations celebrate profits, religious institutions celebrate their traditions. The only difference is you celebrate using your own hard-earned money, whereas corporations and other institutions celebrate on your money. That said, they deserve their share as much as anyone else because they are working just as hard towards their own agenda. They have just as great a reason to celebrate upon the fulfillment of their objectives. A degree of irony exists naturally in this world, it is perhaps required to sustain it.\
Anyway, so, people celebrate what matters to them. What matters to them is not what really matters to them though, it is what they are made to believe \'93should\'94 matter to them. For example, if you are a Hindu, Diwali should matter to you, if you are a Muslim, Eid should matter to you, if you are a Christian, Christmas should matter to you. If you can escape the above, you are expected to celebrate other such events as New Year\'92s day, Father\'92s day, Mother\'92s day, birthdays, anniversaries and so forth. The truth is, most of our fellow human beings have been indoctrinated and programmed, they celebrate what they are wired to celebrate.\
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\f4 \cf9 How do I celebrate?\
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\f1 \cf2 When your existence benefits others, even one person, you have a reason to celebrate. Whatever be the occasion, my preferred method of celebration is to be of some help, some use to those who need it. And that has been my style ever since I can recall. Conducting or participating in a ceremony is only one type of celebration. I would rather feed someone than flaunt something.\
So, this year, between Diwali, Christmas and New Year, we distributed blankets, shawls, woolen caps and socks to the villagers around us. On all three occasions above they gathered and sang devotional songs, we made\'a0
\i kheer
\i0 , rice pudding and\'a0
\i halwa
\i0 , an Indian sweet dish. On Diwali, I told them stories of Rama and on Christmas I briefly narrated the life of Christ. The villagers are simple people, unassuming. They got overwhelmed on both occasions and expressed their emotions through sighs and tears.\
Gratitude is one of the greatest ways of celebration that I know of. Celebrating an occasion is merely a social excuse. When you are grateful, everyday becomes a celebration. When you no longer need a reason\'a0\'97\'a0religious or otherwise\'a0\'97\'a0to celebrate, every moment is a celebration, it becomes\'a0a momentous occasion.\'a0Beyond the labels, the dates, the days, there is something profound, deeper, better, greater that exists within you and all around you. It deserves your attention, your time, it is worth celebrating. Life.\
Someone, from a billionaire family, celebrated her birthday a while ago and she wrote to me. I asked her whether she simply spent or if she invested as well on her birthday. She replied that she celebrated in style and just spent. I wrote back saying I was not referring to money but karma. That, she was reaping the rewards of her past good karma but was she investing more to continue reaping in the future as well? When you just live for yourself, you may be celebrating but you are only spending. When celebration becomes synonymous to giving in your life, you begin investing. Your account of bliss and joy, of peace and contentment grows and overflows.\
Go on! celebrate what matters to you. Celebrate life\'a0\'97\'a0yours and others\'92. You are a celebration.\
Peace.\
\
Being at Peace\
ometimes negative emotions or adverse situations can upset and shake you real bad, almost causing an inner ruckus, driving you insane, they can make you say things you wish you had not, they can overpower you making you do things you would rather not. This is further aggravated by a feeling of guilt, a sense of helplessness, after you have calmed down. A while ago I wrote on\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/03/overcoming-negative-thoughts-and-emotions.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf12 overcoming negative thoughts and emotions}}. Allow me to expand on it for you.\
A surge of rush, of anxiety, a tide in your inner world prompts you to take actions in the external world. Contrary to the popular belief, your inner world is not entirely independent of the external one, not till you reach the transcendental state anyway. However, you can control the response you choose in any situation. For example, you are on the road and a rash driver overtakes you dangerously. Your adrenal glands start secreting and you are tempted to give it back to the driver. Your emotional and mental state will be affected lot more by your reaction than just his action. You have practically no choice when it comes to his actions but you have complete freedom over your own.\
A controlled physical response is the easy bit. It requires awareness and fortitude. If someone yells at you, with your own mindfulness you can remind yourself not to shout back, for instance. Easy. Well, almost. What to do though when it is not about some action but emotion? How to get over the mental doom and gloom that engulfs you especially if you held back in the aforesaid situation? What to do when someone\'92s negative opinion about you bothers you, their thoughtless statement causes you grief, their misconduct makes you feel bad? Read on.\
Your inner world is made up of thoughts and it is affected by your emotional state and your state of consciousness. If you let the thoughts settle, emotions settle too. It is like cutting the gas supply to the engine, it will shut down automatically. If you can channelize and harmonize your thoughts, undesirable emotions will disappear like bubbles in a fizzy drink. Let me share one of the most powerful methods with you; with the help of a story:\
\'93I try very hard to control myself, my anger and my negative emotions but they always win over me,\'94 a disciple once said to Buddha, \'93O Venerable One! how do I overcome this weakness of mine?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Buddha ignored his question and kept moving. After a while, he sat down in lotus posture under a banyan tree and spoke, \'93I\'92m thirsty, can you get me water from the river?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Eager to serve his master, the disciple moved towards the river at once. Before he could lower the bowl and fill it, a man with a bullock cart started crossing the shallow river. The water became turbid. Dismayed, the disciple went back empty handed. \'93The water is muddy and unfit for drinking as a bullock cart just crossed the river.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Buddha nodded. After a little while, he asked the disciple to try again. The water was still murky and he came back empty handed again. \'93It was less muddy,\'94 he said, \'93but still unsuitable for drinking.\'94\
Buddha maintained quietude for half an hour before instructing him again. The disciple was pleased to find clear water this time, the mud and other particles had settled down. He filled the bowl with water and went back to the master.\
With utmost mindfulness, Buddha took a few sips. He put the bowl down and said, \'93You see, when the water got muddy, the easiest method to clean it was to let it be. Had you made any attempt to clear it at the time, it would have ended up worse. You just let it be, you simply waited and the mud settled down on its own. Other than patience, there was no effort. Similarly, when your mind is greatly disturbed just let it be. It\'92ll calm down, it\'92ll settle in due course, give it a little time, be patient.\'94\
So, when you are bogged down by a disturbing or undesirable streak of thoughts, first be aware that it is muddy and secondly, let it be. Give it time to settle down. Do not act on it right away. Have a bit of self-dialog, tell your mind that you are aware it is upset, it is unsettled. It will change the drift of your thoughts. That said, it will greatly help your cause if you get rid of the mud altogether eventually. Water will stay pristine thereafter, your mind will be clear and free of contamination.\
With practice, you can strengthen and insulate your inner world to such a level that it remains unmoved, unfazed, unsullied, no matter what.\'a0Meditation, serving the mankind, good karma, gratitude, being positive are some of the methods that help you get rid of the impurities; you can add praying to the list if you wish.\
Be aware when it is muddy and then let it be for a little while. Those are the moments of non-action.\'a0\'a0Let the hurricane of emotions pass.\'a0For your own peace of mind, do not act when you are feeling negative. A Step taken in a state of emotional turmoil is like snorkeling without your mask, in salty water at that.\'a0All things when left alone return to their natural state.\
Peace.\
\
It is one of the greatest and most rewarding attributes you can work on \'97 attentiveness. There is a slight yet significant difference between mindfulness and attentiveness. Mindfulness is maintaining a sense of awareness, a sort of consciousness that you are watching your own thoughts, your actions. With greater practice, your level of mindfulness rises to a degree that it becomes effortless. Mindfulness is the basis of a graceful living, a stable life, a sound mind. It is also the essence of meditation. That reminds me: a while ago I had recorded a discourse on\'a0
\i dhyana yoga
\i0 , meditation. It is in Hindi. You can watch it\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SLsIRGGMYkk"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 here}}.\
Getting back to my present topic, attention is a conscious effort. You are paying attention and you are conscious that you are trying to be attentive. If you pay attention to yourself, your actions, environment and your body, you naturally inculcate an effortless and rewarding discipline and order in your living. Attention leads to mindfulness eventually.\
My focus today is predominantly on paying attention to your body. Fitness of the physical body is more important than any religious ritual, in my opinion. We enjoy all pleasures through the body, however transcendental they may be. It is through the body alone that you experience what you do and it is your body that puts up with the good and bad results of any action you perform.\
This world with all its whims and fancies, joys and sorrows, pleasures and pains, exists for you as long as you have the body. A lot of people do not treat their body with the same care as they would treat their money, relationships, work etc. Or perhaps, it is a question of priority. Your physical fitness, regardless of your age, deserves to be on the top.\
Nothing happens instantly in the play of nature. The same goes for your body too. I have observed countless times that often small ailments, when not tended, turn into major problems. Many a time, your body shows symptoms and signs long before anything is diagnosed. If you choose to ignore its nudges, it expresses in the form of a disease later on.\
Imagine running on the tread-mill at a fast pace for an hour and then simply getting off it without cooling down. It might do you more damage than good. Similarly, in life after you have caught up pace, when you wish to stop, you need to give yourself time to slow down, to cool down. You cannot afford to keep running at the same pace throughout.\
Evolution over numerous lifetimes has helped your body develop a\'a0sophisticated\'a0mechanism of survival. When you are eating a wholesome meal, no matter how delicious, your body tells you when you should stop. It makes you feel sleepy when it wants rest, it wakes you up when it has got enough sleep, you feel thirsty when your body needs water, you feel hungry when it needs food. The easiest way to keep your body fit is to listen to it, to pay attention to it. If you do not ignore it and exercise, your chances of keeping your body fit and healthy sky rocket.\
The human body can take a lot when young, that does not mean it is justifiable to abuse it. Often the results of such abuse show through in the later years. If someone smokes a lot, lives off junk food, the body may still remain fit when young but sooner or later, the perils of such living catch up.\'a0Is it any coincidence that all yogic scriptures give great importance to eating right and physical exercises!\
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\f2\i \cf3 Rip\

\f1\i0 \cf2 It is never too late or too early to adopt a healthy lifestyle. And what is a healthy lifestyle? A balanced life is a healthy one: balanced diet, work and exercise. Your body is an instrument of life, of living, of experiences. It is not a cage for your soul but a potent vehicle of knowledge and insight. All acquisition of knowledge is through the senses. There will be no senses if not for the body. Befriend it, treat it with care.\'a0Love thyself.\
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\cf2 Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\cb1 \
Do you ignore yourself?\
\cb10 From the outset, we are taught to be good, to be compassionate, to be giving, forgiving and so forth. Good teachings. No doubt. A virtuous living \'97 religions preach it, teachers teach it, parents instill it, society expects it, your loved ones want it. You often find yourself constantly working towards it, never-ending, like the dog catching its own tail. Their expectations never seem to end and probably they can say the same about you. Here is my take on this, you may find my perspective a little unusual:\
Imagine a tree, a strong and a fruit-laden tree. If it is nurtured well, it will give more fruits season after season, vines may creep around it, it may give shade to others, on its boughs birds may build their nests, squirrels may home themselves somewhere in its trunk, there may be an aroma, a fragrance of freshness in the air. Not only does it seem to be supporting an ecosystem, it has almost become an ecosystem in itself.\
All of the above is only possible if the tree is strong, if it gets nourishment and nutrition, if it has the room to spread and grow its roots, if it gets the fresh air, the oxygen, the sunlight it needs. If, however, the tree is starved and deprived of its basic requirements, it will start to decay before completely perishing one day. Consumers of its fruits, the birds, squirrels, other creepers, the ecosystem, everything gets affected adversely.\
Now envision you are that tree. What a beautiful sight when you are fragrant and fruit-laden, when you are green and healthy, when birds are singing, everyone gets the benefit. But you can only provide such value on a sustainable basis when you remain alive and strong. For that to happen, you ought to give yourself what you require. No matter who you are, a daughter, a mother, a CEO, whoever, whatever, if you do not work on your own fulfillment, if you keep ignoring what matters to you simply to keep up with the expectations of others, you will increasingly find the charm of life disappearing like dew in sunlight.\
If you are happy within, fulfilled, somewhat complete, taken care of, you will be able to take care of others much better. Be not so busy that you forget yourself. There is a fine line between being a pushover and being polite. And what is that fine line? You need not ask me or anyone else. Inquire within. Your inner voice will give you the most accurate answer. Someone with good financial acumen will tell you to divide your earnings between savings and spending, between expenses and investments, between borrowing and lending. Your financial success depends on that balance. The same goes for your time, for your own life too. Some part of it you give to others and some you retain for yourself, some you spend while some of it you invest.\
If you do not engage in what gives you joy, gives you happiness, your inner peace and bliss will evaporate. You will keep feeling something is missing without knowing what, you will feel angrier with others, with yourself, with the world, you will find yourself getting irritated quickly, you will wonder why you are not as patient as before. If you are experiencing these things, I can say with much conviction, you are not taking care of yourself. Behind your smile, you are hiding the privilege of freedom. You may fool others but you cannot fool yourself. You know your own reality.\
Spend some time in introspection. Write down what you would like to do, what gives you joy, what makes you feel complete, what gives meaning to your life. And start devoting some time, however little, to yourself. You will be amazed at the discovery of new you. Everyone around you will get even more of you, virtues will no longer need to be played, they will come naturally, automatically.\
Mulla Nasrudin, when a little boy, was left home alone one day. His parents promised him a reward if he behaved himself while they were away.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Upon their return they asked, \'93So, did you stay out of trouble and be a good boy?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Just Good? I was way gooder than good. In fact, I was so good that I could hardly stand myself!\'94\
What good is being so good that you cannot even stand yourself! You have to find time now because moment by moment, life continues to pass by, clock continues to tick,\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2011/07/himalayan-expectations.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf12 expectations}}\'a0will stay if not grow. Present mirth hath present laughter as Shakespeare would tell you. Do not let this slip by. Start living. Now is a good time. To take care of yourself is no sacrilege, only taking care of yourself maybe.\
Be not a casualty of virtues, be the cause. No, not a victim. A victor. Don\'92t ignore yourself.\
Peace.\
\cb1 \
How Do you form opinion?\
\cb10 I often say your outer world is a reflection of your inner one. If your inner world undergoes a transformation, you experience a change in the outer one automatically. Some people have tough time grasping it. After all, people you deal with in the real world stay the same. If someone is making you upset, will they change their ways? How does it work, what do I mean? Let me use a Taoist parable to elaborate my perspective:\
Once upon a time there was a woodcutter. A master of his trade, he had a number of axes. Today, it was a sunny day after non-stop rains for more than a week. He decided to go to the forest for some fresh wood. Much to his dismay, he could not find his favorite ax. He looked at every place he could think of. No luck. He was upset with his kids for he thought they might have misplaced it, he was crossed with his wife for he felt she offers no help in his work, he was mad at the whole world. The more he looked around, the more flustered he got. He asked everyone in the family but they had no idea, they said. He was sure they were not telling him the truth.\
Just then he noticed something that put his concerns to rest. He now knew that his family members were not lying. A little away, near the woodshed, next to the fence, he saw his neighbor\'92s young son lurking around. There he was pretending doing nothing. He looked somewhat uncomfortable, uneasy, guilty, in fact. Even though he was at a distance yet the woodman could see a sense of guilt and shame in his eyes, the type a neo-thief often fails to hide. To top it all, his arms were crossed and he quickly disappeared as soon as the woodcutter began moving towards the woodshed.\
\'93What a rogue!\'94 he thought, \'93I may not prove he stole my ax but I\'92ll certainly find a way to get it back. My kids should not be hanging out with this thief.\'94 And he stormed back in his house. He canceled his plan of going to the woods. He was too angry to work. His whole day was ruined, he felt.\
But for how long could he afford to put off his work! The next day, he went to his woodshed to grab another ax and there it was, hidden under the chopped wood, lying as it was, much to his amazement. His favorite ax was right there. Suddenly, his joy and bliss returned, he was happy again, his world was complete again. For a little while he felt bad for suspecting others.\
Coincidentally, he met his neighbor and his son in the forest that day. They too had come for more wood. He looked closely at the young one, as if scrutinizing him. This time though, the woodcutter could not see him guilty, he did not look like a thief anymore, in fact, the kid looked every bit noble and honorable. His eyes looked innocent and his countenance stately. \'93Is he the same kid?\'94 he wondered.\
Beautiful story.\
Does it not happen so often in real life too? Based on your thoughts, your emotions, your own state of mind, you form an opinion. It feels hard to be neutral. In the yesteryears, I used to meet many who were not competent in their area of work yet they would blame their lack of success on racism, favoritism etc. Every glance by anyone from another race, culture, color, religion would make them feel as if they were being discriminated against.\
Sometimes you are so sure about what you think but any surety is often a matter of opinion. This is what I mean when I say how you perceive the outer world is a direct derivative of what is stocked in your inner one. If you are paranoid, if you are insecure, you will feel edgy with the whole world, your mind will make you think as if everyone has some hidden agenda, as if everyone is out there to get you. Your conditioning directly affects the quality and nature of your opinion. People have opinions about things they do not know, about other people they have not met, about religions they do not practice, about almost everything in life. It is normal; does not mean there is no better way though.\
If you are constantly stressed or sad, if you are mostly worried and down, if you are unhappy more than you are joyous, take a hard look at your\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/04/are-you-happy-or-unhappy.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 opinion\'a0}}about others, about the world. If you examine it with patience, you will find a pattern emerging. I have seen people who are unhappy are mostly so with everyone, those who are positive and appreciative always find something good in everyone to admire. And how to rise above your opinions? Spend some time in introspection, self-contemplation. You will see the world in a new light thereafter.\
Go on! Derive a viewpoint from your first-hand experiences and not based on what others tell you. This will empower you beyond your wildest imagination.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\cb1 \
Bottled Up\
\cb10 Sometimes shouting in anger can be relieving, it lets you release a lot of clogged up emotions, one fit of rage and a lot of unused stuff gets flushed. But when you shout in anger, it also pains the other person and certainly affects the quality of your relationship. Adversely. So, it is not a viable option. Plus, since it is associated with the emotion of anger, it leaves you weaker, maybe even guilty afterwards. Imagine if you could shout without being angry. Sounds silly? Read on, your opinion may change by the time you get to the end of this post.\
In the name of decency and etiquette, conditioned by\'a0religion, our society does not really allow free expression. As long as what you express fits in the their operating model, it is good. If you make diversions, it starts to distance itself from you. Should you make a radical move, it rejects you completely. Socrates had to drink poison, Christ was crucified, Aristotle managed to escape. We need not even go that far, you shout at your boss and you get the pink slip, you shout at the referee on the soccer ground and you get the red card. Any expression that does not meet their approval, society tries to kill it.\
Physical activities whether they be sports, shopping, working out in the gym, even the act of making love, they all give you an outlet. A tiny window of opportunity to freely let go of yourself. You can shout at the top of your voice in a sports stadium or just when you are lifting heavy weight and so forth. Immediately thereafter you feel calm and relaxed like the landscape after a downpour, it looks green and fresh and new. All intellectual activities give you either an engagement or an outlet. There are people who write to corporations, governments with their opinions ranging from world-hunger to leaking washroom taps. They well know their letters may never be read but it provides them an outlet. And that is the key \'97 an outlet! What if there was a way to flush out every undesirable emotion out of your system. Well, there are. Many. Some of you are like sealed but shaken up bottles of carbonated water. There is a storm inside but it is deceptively calm from the outside.\
If you look at children, they can just shout and cry, offload their emotions and be happy again the next moment. The vital difference is they are not shouting at anyone, they are just shouting. They are not yet bound by the laws of the society. Considering them immature, people are willing to put up with their tantrums. An adult on the other hand throws mental tantrums, all in his mind. They cannot just shout, they need to \'93shout at\'94. Let me get to the crux of the matter now. Go find an isolated place where you can shout. Yes,\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/09/why-do-people-shout-in-anger.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 shout}}. Without any inhibitions. A place where you can just go loud without worrying if anyone is hearing you. Really loud.\
Shout till you feel all that is bottled up in you is released, years and years of emotions. Perhaps you had moments when you were wronged and you wanted to cry but you could not, when you lost a loved one but you could not express your loss, moments when you were scared but you had to put on a brave face, you were let down but you thought you were unaffected, you may have sacrificed your own ambitions, goals and preferences for the sake of your family and friends. There is a lot of dormant stuff, it is making you feel heavy, it is clogged up in you, release it. So, shout till tears start rolling down. You will feel light like never before.\
Feel it. Just look within yourself, how much stuff are you carrying in you! Most of it is not by choice, you are just unaware how to get it out of your system. People are meditating, they are exercising, they are playing, they are trying, they want to feel light, they want to be happy, they want to experience peace. Ever seen the look on a toddler\'92s face when they are sleeping or smiling? They are good at emptying themselves. Empty yourself. Vent it before it bursts you. If you have a positive emotion \'97 give it an outlet and it will grow; like one candle lighting others. You have a negative emotion? Give it an outlet and it will leave you lighter.\
You are a consecrated entity, worship yourself, drop all that makes you feel unworthy of your own devotion. Do not keep it bottled up. Empty yourself.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\cb1 \
Cracked Pot\
\cb10 Someone wrote to me asking if self-improvement is an endless pursuit. He wrote, \'93Are we to keep trying forever?\'94 He was alluding to the fact that if we keep working on ourselves forever finding faults in us, when will we actually enjoy life? Is life meant to be a drag? Are you supposed to keeping seeking room for improvement? To think about it, it is a beautiful question.\
Personally, I do not believe that you need to fit into someone else\'92s frame of perfection. Besides, aiming for perfection is often a matter of personal choice, an individual preference. Perfection is subjective; what is perfect to you may not be even half-decent for the other person. The goal is not to fulfill the world\'92s criteria of excellence but to fill your own life with grace, bliss, compassion. They are the ingredients of a virtuous life, as perfect as it can get.\
Long, long ago, there was a poor but noble man. There was no source of water nearby his home. So, everyday, he would go down to the river carrying two large pots hung from the each side of a stick that rested on his shoulders. These pots were made from metal and one of them was so worn out that three years ago a crack, almost a hole, had formed in it. As a result, it looked more like a percolator, drop by drop it leaked constantly. The other vessel was in perfect shape though. Each day the man would fill both the pots to the brim and every time the cracked pot would only be half full by the time the home came. Once home, he would promptly transfer the contents in an earthen pot.\
The cracked pot felt guilty. It wanted to serve its master but it was helpless as there was no way for it to fill the crack, to plug the hole. The perfect pot looked down on the cracked pot for it was aware of its own superiority. There were times when the cracked pot felt jealous of the perfect pot but it mostly felt helpless and depressed. No matter how hard it tried, it only ever reached home half-empty.\
One day, when the master was by the river, it said, \'93I\'92m a pathetic pot. I\'92m so sorry for I\'92m unable to do my job. You fill me up everyday and carry home so much weight but I never get there full like the other pot. Please forgive me, I\'92m so ashamed of myself. You deserve a better pot, a perfect one and not a cracked pot like me. Please sell me to the smith. Let him end my miserable and useless life. You\'92ll get relief too.\'94\
\'93Useless?\'94 the man spoke compassionately, \'93I wish you knew how proud I am of you. Who doesn\'92t have flaws? I do too. If I could afford, I would have had you repaired long time back so you wouldn\'92t feel like this today. But then again in our flaws lies our divinity. A sense of flawlessness is no more than a viewpoint, often an arrogant one in fact. Have you any idea, how much you\'92ve helped in beautifying this place?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Me? Help?\'94 the cracked pot exclaimed, \'93Beautifying?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Yes! I would like you to observe your side of the track when we go home today.\'94\
The man began walking home and the cracked pot realized that on one side of the path, specifically on the side it was on, there were flowers, beautiful flowers, all the way. Butterflies were hovering on them, bees were buzzing on some, there was fragrance in the air.\
\'93A while ago, I planted a new variety of flower seeds. I figured the water dripping from you could easily provide nourishment to the seeds. And now look! not only do we have beautiful flowers but the bees have carried the pollen far and wide and we have more and more of these flowers blooming everywhere. These ones attract bees like anything and there are more natural beehives in the village now than ever before. If not for your so-called flaw, it would not be possible to have this beauty, fragrance and utility that we have today.\'94\
Hope you like the story as much as I did when I first came across it. In our flaws are already sown the seeds of perfection. Rather than aiming to be somebody else, instead of aspiring to be some perfect pot, it is far more important to put to use both our strengths and limitations. If you are honest about your cracks and are willing to see where they may add meaning to your own life, a whole new world of possibilities opens up.\
There is nothing called absolute weakness or strength, they switch roles based on the context and need. A sturdy stick may be good as a walking support, but it is a supple one you need to make a bow. What is strength from one perspective is weakness from another. No matter how cracked one is, they have a role to play.\
Be yourself.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\cb1 \
Do you compare yourself with others?\
\cb10 If you reflect on the matter patiently, you will discover that most people lead most of their lives in a comparative fashion. There is always some comparison with something or someone else. So much so, most achievements are polarized, as if they are on some weighing scale, as if you must do better than somebody else to be any good, as if you must be like someone else to be any better and so forth. There is this never ending race to keep your pace up with the world, to be somebody else. If you feel this way, the fault is not really yours. The solution though lies in you. Read on to know what I mean.\
From the moment you can recall to the present one, there has always been some form of comparison in your life. No matter how hard you worked, how well you did, there was perhaps someone else who was better in the eyes of the parents, teachers, peers and so forth. The goal, even when achieved, seemed unattainable. It is somewhat ironic that our society actually seeks pleasure in winning and losing, rather than playing. Winning feels so exhilarating that absence of compassion in the winner towards the loser appears natural. Sometimes, there is even a sense of fulfillment, of joy, in the suffering of others; Germans have a word for it: Schadenfreude. Do you really want to be in some race in such a society?\
Once upon a time, there was a young man. He was pursuing his doctorate in Rocket Science. He was skinny but intelligent. A beautiful young girl found his intellect irresistible and became his girlfriend. All his friends were jealous of him. They tried their best to somehow cause a rift in their relationship but were unsuccessful. One day, a student in the university, a bodybuilder and heavy weightlifting champion, bullied the young man and asked him to stop going out with the girl.\
Our man was just over one hundred pounds whereas the big guy weighed twice as much. The laws of physics were against him yet he refused to be bullied. The weightlifter beat him to pulp. The young man vowed to build his body and teach him a lesson. He took leave of absence from the university, worked out in the gym, tripled his diet, drank protein shakes and all. In just under a year, he doubled his weight too. He was less agile than before but it was a small price to pay, he thought. Determined to give it back, he went back to the campus.\
He got beaten again though, more badly than before. His friends visited him in the hospital and wondered how come he lost even though he weighed over two hundred pounds now.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93The big guy weighed 350 pounds this time,\'94 he managed to let out a few words from his broken jaw.\
When you get into some race of doing better in comparison to some other person, it becomes an endless and a meaningless pursuit. You may experience some happiness when you reach your goal, the journey will remain flat and lifeless though. It will remain a stressful trek. No matter how good you get, there is always going to be someone who will be better than you. You must set your own benchmark. If you must, let others\'92 achievements be your inspiration and not an aim.\
Next time you are down because you are not like so-and-so person, because someone else is doing better than you, please know that you are being silly. Remind yourself that it is directly stemming out of your conditioning. You really do not have to be anyone else to be happy, to give meaning to your life. You are free to feel inspired from others\'92 success but do not fall into the trap of becoming them. Imitation may be the best form of flattery but when you aim to copy someone else, you lose your own identity; when you lose that, the very basis of your world \'97 you and your inner strength \'97 is shaken to the core. The journey becomes a drag and goal remains out of sight.\
A kid clad in night-suit joined a group of other children dressed to the occasion of Halloween. They knocked on a neighbor\'92s door.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Trick or treat,\'94 they shouted in excitement and anticipation as soon as the door opened.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 A generous lady came out and gave candies but was surprised to see one of the kids in his pajamas.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93And, what are you being today?\'94 she asked lovingly.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93I\'92m just being lazy.\'94\
Like they say, \'93And in the end, it\'92s not the years in your life that count. It\'92s the life in your years.\'94 When you choose in comparison to others, when you determine your own value in contrast to others, when you rank yourself based on someone else\'92s criteria, you do not add life to your years. In fact, it is more like taking the life out of your living; only years remain. Pointless.\
Be yourself. Discover yourself.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\cb1 \
Toxic Anger\
\cb10 Recently, I talked about the benefits of being non-spontaneous with your anger. When you do not express anger as a visceral reaction, as a spontaneous emotion, you give yourself a choice and ample room to recompose yourself. You can then choose if you wish to respond in kind or let go or forgive and so forth. In my talk, I mentioned waiting for three days before you express yourself. You can hear this short\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://youtu.be/RUQ0u2XtF-U"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 English discourse here}}. Someone from the audience asked an interesting question: she said, \'93Is it not more damaging to hold that anger within, even if it\'92s for three days?\'94\
Although I have written a fair bit on anger in the past,\'a0I should elaborate further I thought. In particular, allow me to help you differentiate between reactive and toxic anger. After all, would it not help if you knew whether your anger has mellowed down in your heart or if it has just gone hiding for the time being? How would you know that an outburst was the end of your anger or if it was simply a tip of the iceberg? Read on.\
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\f4 \cf9 Reactive anger\
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\f1 \cf2 Reactive anger can be your emotional, physical or psychical response to any unmanageable situation. As the name says, it is your reaction, it could be your impulsive response. It may be triggered by sadness, disgust, surprise, or fear. If it is simply a reaction, an outburst, you may even feel light and better afterwards. When it is caused by sadness, it may be a release of clogged up negativity and frustration. However, when it is due to disgust, fear or surprise, it is your spontaneous response, it is like someone caught you off-guard, it is more like a fit of rage. You may feel like breaking things, kicking, punching, screaming. It is rather common for people to shout when anger is a matter of reaction. It can be a coping mechanism too, in fact, it often is. Especially in households where children see the parents shouting and arguing, they too tend to either become angry, maybe even violent, like their parents or greatly insecure and fearful in their later years. Even though it is highly damaging, reactive anger is still not as bad as toxic anger.\
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\f4 \cf9 Toxic anger\
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\f1 \cf2 When you suppress any emotion, it settles itself in your consciousness like a poisonous seed. With more suppression over a period of time, it thrives and grows eventually causing enormous, sometimes irreparable, damage to your body and mind. Turbulent childhood or an abusive relationship are the two most common causes from my observation in having met numerous people till date. However, sometimes your partner is narcissistic, the relationship is not abusive but it does not allow any free expression. You are not given the opportunity to express your opinion or anger. It could easily be a situation at work too. At that time, you hold back your anger. If you keep it in you, if you do not let it go, it will become increasingly toxic over a period of time. And how do you know whether you managed to flush it out of your system or if it is still in there? As follows:\
Toxic anger, a resident emotion, can often lead to depression and anxiety. It can bring damning metabolic changes resulting in severe headaches and weight gain. It can trigger heart disease, high blood pressure, and cancer. Yes, cancer. Simply put, cancerous cells are ultra-healthy cells that flourish in an oxygen-free environment. So, if oxygen could be supplied, as an internal mechanism, to the cancerous areas, it will clean itself. Yogic and Ayurvedic texts state that anger and other negative emotions have a direct negative impact on the quantity of\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/04/the-ten-vital-energies.html"}}{\fldrslt 
\i \cf4 prana vayu}}
\i ,\'a0
\i0 the vital life force in the air we inhale. And such lack of\'a0
\i prana\'a0
\i0 causes tumors among other metabolic, hormonal and glandular disorders. Think of\'a0
\i prana\'a0
\i0 as the essence of oxygen we require for survival. Examine your own physical health to ascertain if you might be harboring anger.\
A far more important question is how do you check your anger? How do you do mental detoxification? Recently, a group of people joined me for a three-day retreat where I briefly talked about meditating on various virtues to help yourself get to an anger-free state, free from both toxic and reactive anger. However, there is more to what I talked. It is on my priority list to cover it in detail by the end of this year. In the meantime, you could read up on my posts on forgiveness, gratitude, compassion. You could also go over the short e-book called Seven Yogic Practices. It is a free download.\
The more you know yourself, the greater awareness you gain about yourself. With that awareness, you become mindful of your actions and reactions. And that, in its own right, is an incredibly powerful trait. Equally important is to take care of yourself, to give yourself some breathing space, to not to be too hard on yourself, to experience and live with a sense of freedom. If you are in an abusive relationship, you are mistreating yourself, you are doing a disservice to yourself. You deserve better.\
You are allowed to lead a happy life, it is perfectly fine for you to do things that matter to you, it is okay to be yourself. A good relationship, a healthy environment gives you that respect and personal space.\
Reactive or toxic, it is not worth it. There are better ways to manage your emotions. Only if you let yourself.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\cb1 \
The value of love\
\cb10 What is more important? To value what you have or to value what you do not have? Think about it for a moment. Gratitude is valuing what you have and ambition is valuing what you may or may not have in the future. If you drown the voice of gratitude in the roars of your ambitions, all you will be left with is a great deal of noise and no music. Why? Because often ambitions are endless, they are in multiple, they are not cohesive whereas gratitude is the collective response to everything life has given you, everything you already have.\
Long, long ago on an island lived a group of emotions, both positive and negative. Their names were Pleasure, Sorrow, Grief, Insecurity, Anger, Fear, Compassion, Humility and Gratitude. That was not all though. The island was inhabited by other entities that governed a higher place in the society. They were Ego, Wealth and Time. Love was a resident too but it mostly lived with others, it never held onto anything, it owned nothing, it was mellow, kind and soft. All of the above were tenants at the houses of humans on that island.\
With glaciers melting and the sea level rising, the island was gradually sinking. It was clear it would disappear before long. The residents called an urgent meeting and concluded it was time to leave the island. They decided everyone was responsible for making their own arrangements. They got to the task. Love thought differently though. It did not want to abandon an island that sheltered it for so long. It wanted to wait till the last moment, it was hopeful some might stay back. For Love, it was not a matter of trade or give-and-take, it was more a question of integrity and promise. The island was fast losing its dry ground to the obdurate ocean.\
The humans were the first to leave the island. Some of the negative emotions like Sorrow, Grief and Insecurity left with them. Love had no boat of its own. It looked expectantly at the other emotions on the ship and pleaded, \'93Please, can I board your ship?\'94 Humans did not even respond. They were too busy fighting among themselves.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93We\'92ve latched onto the humans ourselves,\'94 the emotions spoke in unison, \'93we\'92ve no place for you here.\'94\
Just then, Love saw Ego sailing his boat made of steel. It looked rather strong, heavy but sturdy.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Can I join you?\'94 Love said, \'93I take very little space.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93No!\'94 Ego yelled, \'93Anger and Fear have taken the other two places I\'92ve on my boat. Besides, I have only met you occasionally whereas they are my bosom friends. I can\'92t let them go.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Water was rising fast and at a short distance Love saw a magnificent yacht. It was owned by Wealth.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Can you please let me on board?\'94 said Love.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93I\'92m sorry but I already have Pleasure,\'94 Wealth responded, \'93I can\'92t part company with him.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Love looked at the dismal state around. Just then a voice called out, \'93Come, Love, come. Hop in.\'94\
As soon as Love got on the boat, it saw Compassion, Humility and Gratitude exuding brilliant radiance. They were on board already. Love thanked them.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Oh, it\'92s not our boat,\'94 Gratitude said, \'93you need not thank us.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Whose boat is it then?\'94 Love was surprised. \'93Who has saved me?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93It belongs to Time,\'94 Compassion answered.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93But, I was worthless in everyone else\'92s eyes. Why has Time saved my life?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93You see, Love,\'94 spoke Humility, \'93Time alone knows your real value.\'94\
If you reread and reflect on it, this anecdote has the wisdom of life. In our fast-paced world, you can be so focused on getting to the destination, in crossing the finish line, that priceless things appear worthless. The worth of anything is not determined from its price but value.\
Imagine you sacrificed your health and your family to make ten million dollars faster than anybody you know. The price of that sacrifice maybe ten million but what about the value of that ten million? Is it worth the price, the sacrifice? When gratitude fuels your ambition, it becomes an effortless journey but when ambition drives gratitude, a sense of lacking never really leaves you. When you have compassion, gratitude, humility, what you have is love indeed. These three are the primary constituents of love. Every other variation may just be an attachment or an obsession.\
It is when we lose what we have, when Time separates us from what we take for granted that we really understand the value of what we had. You can hear a short discourse on gratitude,\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://youtu.be/ycifEVlHwdI"}}{\fldrslt \cf12 here}}.\
Be\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/05/be-grateful-to-be-strong.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf12 grateful}}.\
Love.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\cb1 \
Decision Making\
\cb10 Do you suffer from indecisiveness? From how I see it, it is a kind of mental shortcoming, a weakness. Those who are afraid of making choices often keep postponing their decisions. There is a false belief that the longer you wait to make a decision the better it will be. I am not suggesting you become impulsive but at the same time it is just as daft to keep waiting forever.\
At every step of our lives, we are faced with choices. If you reflect on the matter, you will find it is not so much about making right or wrong choices as much as it is about making a decision with the awareness that you are willing to take the responsibility of your choices. You can deliberate and cogitate eternally, it still does not guarantee you will make the right decision. After all, there is no way of knowing whether a decision is right or wrong at the time you are making it. It is mostly from the outcome you can gain such knowledge.\
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\f4 \cf2 What drives your decision making?\
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\f1 \cf2 At the heart of almost every decision you make, there are three factors: desire, fear, and conditioning. Deciding one way or the other is often dependent on the benefits you get versus the loss you may incur. If the desire of benefits outweighs the fear of loss, you will choose in favor of the benefits, and vice-versa. There is nothing called not making a decision, this in itself is a decision. Beyond the gain and loss, material or otherwise, conditioning, by society, religion, culture, plays a critical role. What will others think? Others\'92 opinions can influence your decision, especially if you are not careful in filtering them out.\
It is impossible to factor in all the variables of future, it is in fact juvenile to even try that. When you have to make a decision, do so based on what you know and get on with it. If your decision yields the desired results, rejoice and share. If it does not, remind yourself that it was a conscious choice you made and that you are willing to bear the consequences. It is not the end of the world. You cannot expect to make only those choices that lead to the expected outcomes. No matter how intelligent, intuitive or ingenious one is, it is normal for some decisions to be flawed.\
Before making any decision ask yourself two golden questions:\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 1. Why am I making this decision?\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 2. Am I prepared to take the responsibility of my decision?\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Every choice you make will have a consequence. As long as you are bold enough to take the responsibility of your choices, life will present you with enough opportunities to make better ones.\
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\f4 \cf2 The Hindsight Trap\
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\f1 \cf2 When our choices do not lead to the desired outcome, it is natural to believe that we should have done this or we could have done that. Somewhere you want to believe that you could have corrected your choice, you could have listened to the one who was advising you against it, you could have analyzed better, you could have waited and so on and so forth. I call this the Hindsight Trap. The fact is you made the best choice at the time. As they say vision is ten-by-ten in hindsight. That is all good but you are not driving in the reverse gear on a freeway, you cannot afford to settle your gaze on the rear-view mirror while you drive forward.\
Living by your decision is comparable to driving on the road: you occasionally check your side-view and rear-view mirrors, you pay attention to the traffic around you, you may change lanes but you keep moving towards your destination. There are going to be\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/07/how-to-overcome-distractions.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf12 distractions\'a0}}and\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/07/how-to-deal-with-self-doubt.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf12 doubts}}. It is part of the game. You are good if you can say to yourself, \'93Given what I know, I am making the best possible choice.\'94 Over a decade ago I read \'93Who Moved My Cheese?\'94. It is a nice read.\
\'93Clearly your marks show you haven\'92t been studying geography at all!\'94 said the teacher, \'93what\'92s your excuse?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93I don\'92t have any excuse, Ms. Johnson,\'94 the little Johny said, \'93it\'92s just that my father says the world is constantly changing. So, I thought I should wait till it settles down and then study it.\'94\
Do not keep waiting till eternity. When eternity comes, you will be dealing with a different set of challenges. If you want to do something, go ahead and go for it. Only actions create results. Thoughts alone and ceaseless planning lead to an endless path devoid of the joys of journey. Such path has no guiding milestones nor the euphoria of any destination. Only empty words, hollow plans.\
If you are serious about learning how to swim, you will have get your feet wet sooner or later. There is no other way that I know of. Someone may guide you, you may use floaters at the beginning but eventually, you will have to be there on your own, you will have to take charge. If you are bothered by other people\'92s opinions,\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8VcDq7-9nXQ"}}{\fldrslt \cf12 watch this short discourse}}.\
It is okay to make mistakes, to make wrong decisions. Accept them, correct them to the best of your ability and move on. Do not punish yourself. Change is happening now. You are making your decisions in the dead past and the ever-elusive future. All statements with \'93could have\'94, \'93should have\'94, \'93would have\'94 denote dead decisions. All statements containing \'93will\'94 and \'93shall\'94 reflect your decisions of the future. Now is the only truth. In the current context, the simple present and the present continuous are just about the only two tenses with any substance. All the other ones are simply there to tense you.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\cb1 \
Afraid of Getting Old\
\cb10 Are you afraid of getting old? All those who see death at a ripe age have to go through old age. There are some who keep defying it till their last breath and there are many who start feeling old even in their forties. Does human body become more fragile as people age? Well, general observation of the world around us certainly vouches for that. But what if, hypothetically speaking, we removed one\'92s physical age from the equation? The concept of old age will get a new definition perhaps. I have known numerous people who lived through abusive relationships, who suffered torment, trauma and torture for the most part of their life only so they could have someone around when they get old. The fear of being alone when old can really haunt some. So, when does one get old? Read on.\
When your life has more memories than ambition, consider yourself old. When all you have to talk about is how you did this in the past or how you did that in the past, how you were amazing a decade ago or how you were so incredible back then. When you no longer live your present or look up to your future, when all you do is reknit the same stories in the present using yarn of the past, you are old. An unfailing sign of the one who feels old within is they mostly talk about their past.\
Old age is inevitable for all blessed with a normal lifespan. When anything is inevitable, it means you only have two choices: first, handle it with grace and gratitude or second, deny it with griping and whining. Old age is like the Friday afternoon at work \'97 it gets quiet, it slows down before the weekend break. And what is death? Well, death is the weekend. Consciousness moves on. If you believe in soul or rebirth, a new birth awaits you. If you believe in heaven or hell, who knows you may just live a life of your dreams in one of those places. If you don\'92t believe in anything, well then, hopefully you know your own answer.\
A priest went to a rich man\'92s funeral. The deceased was his friend and a hardcore atheist who vehemently refuted any notion of God, heaven or hell. It was an elaborate funeral. He approached the coffin. It was made from exquisite teakwood, soft satin lining inside, the body was clad in handcrafted silken robe.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Oh what a shame,\'94 exclaimed the priest, \'93all dressed up and nowhere to go!\'94\
Personally, if you ask me, I am at perfect ease with any of your belief. Whatever gives you inner strength and gives you a sense of peace, adopt that belief. After all, these all are theories anyway, some more convincing than others. That\'92s all. They are not capable of manifesting the truth for you. At the most, they give you an intellectual choice, a way of living.\
The quality of your breath, the basis of your life, does not deteriorate till the last moment. So, you may as well enjoy the various seasons of life. What others think of you is their problem. Deep within you know yourself better than anyone else. The world, society will try their best to make you feel old. Why, even parents, elders, teachers keep telling you to grow up or that you are grown up now. They are not doing it intentionally, they just don\'92t know any better. Often. Have no grudges against them, just learn to increase the volume of your inner voice. It will guide you and help you decide your course of action. One day when Mulla Nasrudin of age ninety decided to marry a girl who was only eighteen, his sons, grandchildren and great grandchildren were appalled.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93What are you doing, father?\'94 the son said, \'93Fatima\'92s only eighteen!\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93So what? Even your mother was eighteen when I first married her.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93You don\'92t get it, do you? Let me be straight up with you; copulation at this age? It may result in someone\'92s death! I\'92m warning you.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Aah\'85don\'92t get all worked up like your mother used to, you stress-head! Don\'92t worry, if Fatima dies, I\'92ll marry another one!\'94 Mulla said.\
I am not saying you kill reason and sense; just don\'92t let anyone ever dictate the way you feel about yourself. No teacher, no preacher, no religion, no authority, no partner. The legal system, your faith and those around you may give you a framework of living, but you alone should set your rules of life. When distant memories become obstacles in covering the distance of your present journey, take charge of your life, your present, and start living! With compassion for others and yourself, make the most of every moment.\
Childhood does not last forever. Youth is not permanent, and old age will end too. Nothing is worth clinging onto. These are fleeting seasons. Live, love, laugh, give while you have. Do so in such a manner that you fall in love with the person you see in the mirror, in a way so there is no burden on your conscience when you put your head down on the pillow.\
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\f2 \cf3 What I longed for will be set aside\cb1 \
\cb10 The things I pursued in vain \'97\cb1 \
\cb10 Let them pass\cb1 \
\cb10 Let me turn\cb1 \
\cb10 To things I overlooked\cb1 \
\cb10 And carelessly threw away\cb1 \
\cb10 To possess them truly until they are mine.\cb1 \
\cb10 (Tagore, Rabindranath. The Stars Look On.)\cb1 \
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\f1 \cf2 \cb10 Be yourself. Love yourself. Know yourself. You will find yourself beyond age.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\cb1 \
What\'92s in your wallet?\
\cb10 In a bus packed with commuters, the conductor found an old and worn wallet on the floor. He picked it up to examine its contents. It had five hundred rupees and a picture of Krishna. There were no other cards or photos. The conductor shouted, \'93Has anyone lost his wallet?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93I have,\'94 replied an old man.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Can you tell me what does it have to prove it\'92s yours?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93I don\'92t remember the exact amount of money but it has a photo of my lord Krishna.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Hmm\'85anyone can have a picture of Krishna,\'94 the conductor said skeptically, \'93can you tell me anything else?\'94\
The old man chuckled before he spoke:\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93My father gifted me this wallet when I began understanding the concept of keeping and saving money. It had a photograph of Krishna in it. He asked me to always do the right karma. I was a bit too young to worry about that though. I put a photograph of my parents on top of the picture of Krishna. I loved my parents more than anybody else in the world. But that feeling didn\'92t take long to change. Earlier my world revolved around them but now it was all about me. I felt they owed it to me to give what I thought I wanted. So as I grew older, I put my own photo on top of theirs. I thought I looked way better than them.\
\'93Soon after graduating out of college, I fell in love with a girl. She was the most beautiful person I had ever seen. I put her photo next to mine, completely hiding my parent\'92s picture underneath. Before long, I was married to her and she gave birth to a boy. I removed my parents\'92 photograph and put my son and my wife\'92s photo in my wallet. My wife and my son were my world. My day began and ended with my son, why, every moment of my life revolved around him. My parents passed away in due course.\
\'93My son was growing up, he got educated, got a job, moved out, got married, got kids, got busy. A few years ago my wife passed, so I removed her picture from my wallet as well. Last year, I fell down from the stairs and I phoned my son and asked him to spend a few days with me. He told me to be strong. He did not invite me to his home and did not visit me saying he was extremely busy and stressed out with work and family. My heart, already wounded, shattered into a million pieces. I removed his picture from my wallet and underneath was the original photograph of Krishna. I had the greatest realization of my life. All relationships are transient, they are based on self-interest, they are temporary. People came and went but the presence of God remained constant in my life.\'94\
The conductor immediately handed back the wallet without uttering another word.\
The bus halted at its final stop and everyone got off. The conductor, a Christian, made quick steps to the nearest stationery and gifts outlet. \'93Do you have any picture of Christ? I need it for my wallet,\'94 \'a0he said to the shopkeeper.\
You need not wait for a jolt to understand the transient nature of this world. Such an understanding, in an empirical way, can be attained by deep contemplation too. Your wallet indicates your priorities in life. Often in the wake of ticking off things, people lose sight of the real stuff, they lose track of their own life.\
On another note, it may sound strange but you can know a great deal about a person from their wallet alone. Some people\'92s purses are full of old receipts, business cards, expired loyalty cards and the rest of it. They often keep clutter in their mind too. If you have a receipt older than a year in your wallet, you probably have grudges older than a decade in your heart.\
Examine your handbag or your wallet. Its looks on the outside are directly proportional to how much you take care of yourself and your needs, it shows how you want to be seen and perceived by others. Its contents show what you keep in your mind, they indicate what all you hold in your heart. Any photographs in it reflect your present priorities. Its overall feel, internal and external, shows your present and aggregate state of living.\
Go on! get a new wallet if necessary. Treat yourself with care; you deserve it. Do it with compassion \'97 towards yourself and others.\
Peace.\
Swami\
\cb1 \
Unconditional Love\
\cb10 The other day, someone I met for the first time asked me an interesting question. Referring to one of my posts on\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/12/why-do-people-love-or-hate-you.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf12 love}}, she said, \'93You wrote in your article that unconditional love is very rare. Isn\'92t a mother\'92s love for a child unconditional?\'94 Before I tell you what answer I gave her, I would like to share with you a little story.\
Once upon a time, there was a couple. They deeply loved each other but the wife could not conceive. She felt guilty for not being able to give a child to her husband. The\'a0medical examination, however, showed an alarmingly low sperm count in the husband. The equation suddenly changed. It was his inability to supply a healthy seed that she could not spawn . Eventually, they got lucky one day and she conceived. While she was pregnant, the state came under siege from the enemy forces. In that war, they lost their home and had to go to a rehabilitation camp. She delivered a baby boy while in the camp. Prematurely. Over time, things began to normalize and they got a new home. They doted on their son. Their life revolved around him. Twelve years passed.\
Someone knocked on their door one day. It was a lady with a young boy and a couple. As fate would have it, they found out that at the time of the child\'92s birth, due to the chaos at the rehabilitation camp, the child actually got exchanged in the incubator. Before the staff member could rectify the mistake, she suffered a deep wound in a bomb blast and went into coma for twelve years. She said she had come to give them back their real son. She further informed that the couple accompanying her were the real parents of the boy they thought was their son all along.\
The lady and her husband were shocked. So was the boy. The boy didn\'92t want to go to his new parents. He just wanted to stay where he was. The woman didn\'92t want to let go off him either, but the moment she took one look at her real son, she faced the greatest dilemma of her life. She felt pulled, attracted and naturally inclined towards him. The dilemma was not about choosing one over the other, it was an emotional turmoil, great confusion about how come she felt a surge of emotions for a boy she saw for the first time in her life. How come she was feeling greater love for her real son, she thought. She did not want to let go off the child she had brought up either. The attachment was too great, too many memories. But she certainly couldn\'92t give up her real son, she felt. The other woman felt the same about her son.\
Just reflect on the story. Take your time. Let it sink in. There is no doubt that a mother\'92s love for a child is one of the highest types. For a mother, it is full of personal sacrifices. It is one of the purest types because a mother\'92s primary wish is to see her child well. She\'92s generally willing to give up anything for the welfare of her children. In the context of her own life and that of her child, a mother\'92s love is selfless. That said, in the broader context it is a little more complicated. And is it unconditional?\
It is love, yes, it is perhaps closest to pure love. It may even be the definition of quintessential love. But it is not unconditional; a human relationship is seldom unconditional. The first condition is the child itself. The child has to be hers. She wouldn\'92t feel the same intensity with just any other child. It is not about mother and any child but about a mother and her child. Imagine a criminal who brutally raped and killed his victim and is waiting for a sentence. Let\'92s assume he\'92ll be sentenced next week where he may be let off with a life sentence or he may be sent to the gallows. The mother of even such a criminal prays to her god for his protection and pardon. She doesn\'92t want her son to die. She knows he ruined a life besides causing irreparable damage to the victim\'92s loved ones. Yet, she still wouldn\'92t want her son to be punished.\
Why is a mother often willing and able to forgive even the gravest acts of her children? The attachment she has with her children, the love she feels for them far exceeds in ardor and\'a0fullness\'a0compared to any other relationship. Why? Let me offer you my perspective. As follows:\
The truth is a mother and her child are not separate entities. A child is a part of the mother in every aspect. He literally comes out of her body, they are created from her very own egg, in the womb he partakes of the same food. A child is a mother\'92s life walking outside, an extension. In fact, a mother achieves immortality through her child. She lives on beyond her own years through that child. She rejoices in seeing her child outdo her because she is not competing against him. You cannot compete against yourself.\
So, if you cannot compete against yourself, why is it not uncommon to see mother-daughter envy though. It\'92s simple. A daughter is a part of her mother, a living derivative. What you see in such a scenario is mere internal conflict projected on the relationship outside. It is not competition leading to conflict, it is the other way around. The harder a mother\'92s own life, the greater the chance of such conflict. Often conflict is merely a reflection of the degree of attachment one may have to a certain viewpoint, object, or person, themselves including. Both a mother and her daughter are potent carriers of civilization, of love, of care, compassion and genetic signature.\
It is for this reason that the love a mother has for her child is beyond classification. I may say that it is not unconditional but in all honesty, I would prefer to stay away from categorizing it as selfless or selfish, conditional or unconditional and so on. It simply is beyond words. No one is smart enough, no words so profound, no intellect so great to even begin understanding the divinity of a mother\'92s love, much less encapsulate it.\
If you have not hugged your mother and expressed your love and gratitude to her, if you have never sat by her feet thanking her for all she has done for you, you have not yet discovered the divine side of love that is latent in you. We shouldn\'92t be celebrating just mother\'92s days but mother\'92s years and mother\'92s lifetimes. Such is my view, you are free to have your own.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 It so happens that it\'92s Mother\'92s day tomorrow. Make it a special one.\
Peace.\cb1 \
\cb10 Swami\
\cb1 \
Why do people Laugh?\
\cb10 Laughter is one of the most fundamental human expressions and a sense of humor is nothing short of divinity. Ever wonder why do we laugh? The roots of laughter go deeper than you might think, they say much about a person, a culture, a race, a group. There are those who can laugh at others, at situations, at themselves. My focus today is why people laugh upon hearing a joke.\
Our race has evolved, grown and adjusted based on the principle of consistency. For thousands of years, our ancestors lived in the caves. They did not change, they did not need to or so they felt. Every time someone caused a disruption with an invention or a discovery, we made another step towards something new, another step away from the norm. Change is rarely welcomed upon its introduction, people feel intimidated with change, they are threatened with the fear of unknown.\
Laughing at a joke is no different. A joke begins with a normal scenario, the type you are comfortable with, the one you find consistent with your belief system. And suddenly, a conflicting situation is presented to you, it is unexpected, unprecedented, there is a change. A certain level of tension builds up, it defies your logic.\'a0Subconsciously, you know there is no threat. So, your mind releases the tension with a peal of laughter. The patterns in your brain get rearranged causing laughter without tickling, so to speak.\
For example, consider the following:\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Mary had a little lamb\'85\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 She found it a bit too spicy.\
When told to children, they laugh much more. Why? They are quick to release tension arising from a conflicting viewpoint, a sudden surprise. An adult on the other hand might have been introduced to more conflicting situations during the course of his own life. He can live with the unfamiliar ending of Mary actually eating her lamb, he couldn\'92t be bothered, it does not create a tension in his head, he\'92s been through much more. It does not tickle his funny bone as much as it does a child\'92s.\
You do not laugh upon a release of tension if you perceive a threat though. Imagine someone appears in front of you suddenly, pulls out a gun from his pocket and shoots in your direction. You are convinced you are shot. You promptly frisk your body to look for wounds and blood but there is nothing, not even a mark. Further imagine, he is playing a prank. You are unlikely to laugh at this one immediately. Because you experienced a certain threat, the conflict between life and death was not just an intellectual proposition, it felt real. The tension was a little too much for you. Upon realizing you are safe, you are more likely to\'a0exasperate\'a0and sigh than giggle and laugh. However, fast forward to a few weeks or months, you may look back at the whole incident and find yourself laughing. Why? Because the underlying threat has disappeared.\
Is life not all about conflicting and contrasting situations? Not all situations need to be taken seriously, you can laugh many of them out. How to rise above that threat? Examine it. If you can analyse it, you can take the right action, you can then focus on the right thought, threat dispels automatically thereafter. Fear is always out of anticipation. There is no fear in the present moment, it is in anticipation of what may happen in the next or subsequent moments.\
The more your mind can handle conflict, the less you laugh at ordinary jokes. The greater the number of your experiences in life, the fewer the jokes that can make you laugh. Through your struggles, your experiences and evolved intellect, life teaches you to accept situations that defy logic, that are highly contrasting, inherently conflicting. You can easily know a great deal about a person from a. the way they laugh, b. the type of jokes they laugh at, and c. at what and who all they laugh at. Something for another time.\
Children or the childlike people can laugh at simple gestures, they can giggle at jokes with no meaning. Similarly, if you become childlike, living in the world becomes a whole lot easier, it gets more interesting. How to be childlike, you may ask? Practice compassion and gratitude. It\'92s also okay to cry and complain like them sometimes. Sometimes.\
In a certain village lived an old man, wise and content. Amidst a group of people, he cracked a funny joke. Everyone laughed. After a silence of a few minutes, he told the same joke again. Fewer laughed this time. He let another few minutes pass and cracked but the same joke again. No one laughed. Most thought the old man had gone cuckoo.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93You can\'92t laugh at the same joke more than a couple of times,\'94 he said, \'93yet you keep crying over the same problems all your life.\'94\
What if you actually realized that conflicting situations in life are there to make you laugh? What if this whole world, this universe is simply a prank, a play, a joke? Either way, laughing it out is better than brooding over it. It is more enjoyable that way. It is a choice. Yours for the taking.\
\'93Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee and I\'92ll forgive Thy great big one on me.\'94 ~Robert Frost\
Laughter means you are\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/10/are-you-comfortable-with-yourself.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 comfortable}}. Go on! Make someone laugh today, it will give you joy.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
I hope you know that more than the external factors, it is you, yourself, who stops you from living, living your\'a0life of dreams. A lot of people are afraid of saying \'93Yes\'94 to life. And why are they scared of opening up, to spread their wings, to scan new horizons? After all, who in their right mind would say no to joy, bliss and happiness? Do you know why? Primarily because from the early childhood we had to seek external affirmations, there was always someone around who would need to approve your actions, someone whose permission was necessary. Parents at home, teachers at school, bosses at work, friends in the society, governments, organizations, religious authorities, you name it.\
Not only are we brought up in a conditioned environment but it is conditional too. Before you can have what you want, there is some condition you are expected to fulfill. Consider the following usual conversations most people go through in their lives:\
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\f4 \cf2 Child and parent:\
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\f1 \cf2 \'93Can I have a \'a0candy?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Finish your dinner first!\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Can I play?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93After you finish your homework.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Can I watch TV?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Clean up your room first.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Go to sleep now!\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Okay, I\'92m going to bed.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Make sure you brush your teeth first.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Can I take a day off from school today?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93NO!\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Can I this, can I that, can I here, can I there, can I now, can I later and on and on and on, you fill in your own memories.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 No, no, no, first do this, first do that. No, no, have you thought about this, have you thought about that etc. etc. Say Sorry, say Thank you, say Please.\
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\f4 \cf2 Employee and boss\
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\f1 \cf2 \'93Is it okay if I leave an hour early today?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Today? Are you serious?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93I\'92m planning to go on a family vacation next month.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Next month? You know it\'92s the busiest time of the year.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 During your performance appraisal: \'93Your performance is good but you could improve in some areas. Congratulations, you get the maximum raise. Three percent.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Thank you.\'94 The inflation rate is nine percent you say to yourself in your head.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Can I ask you a question please?\'94, \'93I\'92m sorry for not meeting the project deadline.\'94, \'93Thank you so much\'85\'94 and so on and so forth. You learn to utilize these golden words in a conditional environment. You are treated like a kid in a grown-up body.\
Imagine the nature of most conversations between two partners, with other family members, with your coworkers, other people in the society, with your accountant. Simple living made reasonably, if not unnecessarily, complex. And this is intelligence?\
There is a difference between being childlike and being treated like a child.\'a0In a way, if you do not start living for yourself, this world will never let you graduate from your school. It will treat you as a child \'97 forever telling you what is good or bad for you, feeding you with what it thinks is right for you. I hope you have had the time to reflect on how precious your life is. The difference between life and death is just that one breath, just one moment. You inhale but do not exhale, that is death. You exhale and do not inhale again, that is death.\
All those infinite possibilities you could be exploring, flying several thousand feet up from the ground or being six feet under, it mostly depends on that one moment, between breathing versus not-breathing. If you are waiting for the work to finish, if you simply have to tick off a few items before you start being yourself, I am afraid such a moment will never come. I am not suggesting you run away from your responsibilities but if saying Yes to life is your priority, there are opportunities waiting for you. Now is the time to live, now is the moment to enjoy.\
Mulla Nasrudin went with his friend to attend the funeral of a rich man. His friend was flabbergasted at the plush and luxury settings.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Look at that coffin, it\'92s made from sandalwood,\'94 he exclaimed, \'93and they have spent ten thousand gold coins on the decorations. See his dress, it\'92s made from handwoven silk! They are putting precious stones, gems and pearls next to him. The tombstone is made from exquisite marble.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Wow!\'94 exclaimed Mulla, \'93now, that\'92s life!\'94\
Do not deprive yourself of the joys just because you are not fulfilling certain conditions others have placed on you. As long as you are not hurting anyone, you are good. Live! Do what you have always wanted to do, be what you have always wished. Give yourself a chance, do not be so hard on yourself, give it a try. Now is the perfect time, for perfection is simply a perspective, and \'91now\'92 the only real moment.\
Go on! Say Yes to life. Break free. Discover your own truth.\
Peace.\cb1 \
\cb10 Swami\
\
A Lost World\
Once upon a time there was a traveler who had to pass through the woods to get to another town. It so happened, he lost his way in the jungle. He navigated in all the directions but found himself in no better position. Each time he thought he was getting somewhere, he found himself deeper in the woods. Confused and confounded, he went through a series of emotions. He prayed, he cried, he cursed, he rested. Another few hours passed, shadows became long, the sun was beginning to hide behind the trees. The lost traveler got scared and worried thinking spending the night in the jungle. He was thirsty and tired.\
In the hope of finding his way, he continued to range the forest without success. His anxiety was getting worse. Just when he thought he would never get out, he saw a man sitting under a tree. His joy knew no bounds, his anxiety turned into excitement. He ran to the man.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Oh my God, oh my God! You are God sent! I\'92m so glad to find you here,\'94 he said in one breath. \'93I\'92ve been wandering since morning. I am lost. I thought I would never be able to see any town ever again, I thought some wild animal would eat me alive tonight. You are my savior. You don\'92t know what it means to me to see you here.\'94 Tears of relief streamed down his cheeks.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93It doesn\'92t matter where you are headed,\'94 he spoke further, \'93please take me with you.\'94 He was done crying now. He was overjoyed and relieved.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The other man just chuckled. He went quiet for a few seconds before he said, \'93I\'92m equally relieved to see you, for I\'92m lost as well but after seeing you I\'92m not as scared now. Strangely, I\'92m not feeling lost anymore.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 They both laughed out loud. Tears welled up too to release the pent-up emotions and anxiety.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Oddly enough, me neither. I\'92m feeling much better too.\'94 And he sat down next to the man.\
This is a lost world. The funny thing is when two people are lost, they feel less lost, when a group is lost, it does not consider itself misplaced at all. There is a sense of consolation, a feeling you are not alone. Such a feeling does not help you in finding your path, it does not assist you in any way, but you feel comforted. After all there must be a reason why others are doing what they are, they must have it figured out, they must have thought of it all, thoughts like these offer you a false sense of security. The truth is they are as lost as you. In fact, you were not lost earlier, you were trying to find a way, you knew where you wanted to go but now you are really lost. Why? Because with all the lost people around you, you have accepted this to be the norm, you may have begun to believe that this is the way.\
This is how faiths are built and passed on, from one generation to the other, from one person to the next, almost like the torch relay. The person forwarding the light to you never saw the finished line, he simply gave you the torch because either his time was up or he was tired. He passed it on as soon as you were within his sight. The only difference between passing on a belief system versus the torch is that a relay race does have an ending line.\
What if you broke the rules? What if you did not pass on the torch, or even better, what if you did not take the torch but ran towards the finish line yourself, on your own, based on your own conviction? You can never lose a way if you are paving a new one.\
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\f2 \cf3 Where roads are made I lose my way.\uc0\u8234 \'a0\cb1 \uc0\u8236 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 In the wide water, in the blue sky there is no line of a track.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The pathway is hidden by the birds\'92 wings, by the star-fires, by the flowers of the wayfaring seasons.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 And I ask my heart if its blood carries the wisdom of the unseen way.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 (Tagore, Rabindranath. \'93VI.\'94 Fruit-Gathering.)\cb1 \
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\f1 \cf2 \cb10 When you pursue what matters to you, the end result may or may not be what you desire but it will leave you a better, stronger, wiser, happier person. You will not feel lost, you will not feel tired, there will be no anxiety. In the words of Ralph Waldo Emerson, \'93Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.\'94\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\
A conditioned Mind\
I am often asked questions around morality. People want to know if this is right or that is wrong, if that is good and this is bad, they want to know if certain acts are moral and others immoral. What is good and what is bad? I ask you \'97 how do we differentiate moral from immoral? Those who ask me such questions often even have strong views on morality. That is not bad, it may even mean they are clear about it. Although more often than not, their views are not their own. These ideologies have been passed down to them. Each generation tends to believe the preceding one had it figured out.\
If you take a moment to reflect, you will find that not only your morality is conditioned, it is conditional too. You may have principles in life but that does not mean your moral decisions are independent, rational, and absolute in nature. Depending on where you live and what religion you practice, certain actions that are moral in your setting, may be immoral in others. Let me share with you an interesting ethical thought-experiment originally created by Philipa Foote in 1967. As follows:\
Imagine there are two rail tracks. Five people are tied on one track and just one person on the other one. There is no time to untie them. A train is fast approaching. If it is allowed to continue on the current course, it will run over the five people. You are standing next to a lever. If you pull it, the train will get diverted to the other track and five people will be saved. However, your action will result in the death of one person.\
What will you do? Should you let five people be dead or kill one person to save five? What if that one person is someone closely related to you? Furthermore, consider the following variations to this experiment:\
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\f4\b \cf9 Variation One
\b0 \
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\f1 \cf2 Imagine a trolley is hurtling down the track towards five people. You are on a bridge under which it will pass, and you can stop it by dropping a heavy weight in front of it. As it happens, there is a very fat man next to you. Your only way to stop the trolley is to push him over the bridge and onto the track, killing him to save five. Should you proceed?\
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\f4\b \cf9 Variation Two
\b0 \
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\f1 \cf2 A brilliant transplant surgeon has five patients, each in need of a different organ, each of whom will die without that organ. Unfortunately, there are no organs available to perform any of these five transplants. A healthy young traveler, just passing through the city the doctor works in, comes in for a routine checkup. In the course of such checkup, the surgeon discovers that his organs are compatible with all five of his dying patients. Should he go ahead and save them sacrificing the life of the healthy patient?\
In all the variations, one person is being sacrificed to save five. The moral complications are not straightforward though. Printed words are black on white. Life is not black-and-white. You really do not need some religion, somebody else, to tell you what is right from wrong, good from bad because they talk in absolute terms whereas life is anything but absolute. If you get caught up in the absolute rights and wrongs, you will only end up more guilty. Set yourself free. By no means am I saying you go around breaking the rules just because they are there but I am suggesting that you examine the rules you have imposed on yourself. The path of compassion is often worth it.\
When you find yourself navigating through a gray area in life, listen to your inner voice. In the words of Fyodor Dostoyevsky: \'93It is not the brains that matter most, but that which guides them \'97 the character, the heart, generous qualities, progressive ideas.\'94 Brain is a calculating machine. It has the ability to justify any act, any act at all. Ultimately, it will be your character that will give you the strength to stand by your own principles. Conditioned morality is a calculative proposition \'97 if you do this then that will happen, this is good because of that, that is bad because of this and so on. Unconditioned morality, on the other hand, is an original act; devoid of calculations, it is simply about living up to your own benchmark, moral or otherwise. And unconditional morality? That is mostly a misnomer.\
Do not hesitate to be yourself. Set your own benchmark.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\
Surrounding to a Guru\
Spiritual and religious texts expounding the Eastern thought are full of master-disciple stories of surrender and obedience. Many people who visit the ashram and many who write to me are inquisitive about the role of a guru on one\'92s path, they ask me if it is necessary to surrender. Furthermore, a lot many admit having troubles in exercising complete surrender to any guru. In continuation with my\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2012/12/what-does-surrender-mean.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 earlier\'a0}}post on surrender I wrote a while ago, let me share my thoughts with you.\
There are thousands of quotes in various texts that lay emphasis on the importance of having right guru. Is it truly that crucial? The answer is it depends on what are you after. If you simply need a teacher who can point you in the right direction based on scriptures and books, there is no dearth of such people. However, if you need someone who can demonstrate any bit of direct experience, someone in whose presence you feel safe, secure, loved, peaceful, you have little choice.\
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\i \cf2 Guru-shishya
\i0 , master-disciple, relationship has been around since time out of mind. Unfortunately, in this day and age, I see more exploitation than exploration. Majority of today\'92s gurus are busy in worldly projects, they are selling merchandise, funding private hospitals that are run for profit, they are building ashrams everywhere they can, they are hoarding money, they are collecting profits, how close you can get to them often depends on how much money you have to offer. It pains my heart to see such fleecing and deterioration. Is there anything wrong with that? You decide.\
If you meet someone who claims to be a Godman, someone who is giving you the sacred\'a0
\i diksha
\i0 , initiation, without examining you, who is simply interested in what all you have to offer, who makes you feel unworthy, insignificant, who banks on your fears, I would say: abandon that person. He is a wolf in the guise of a sheep, a sinner in the garb of a saint. Never ever hesitate to ask questions. If the guru snaps at you, can he ever preach you eternal peace? If he is attached to his material things, is he the right one to teach detachment? If his negative emotions of anger, jealousy, hatred swell up like any other seeker, how will he ever get you to rise above them?\
Before you exercise surrender or before you accept someone as your spiritual master, take your time, be critical. Who was Buddha\'92s spiritual master? Mahavira\'92s? No doubt Buddha, for example, studied and practiced meditation, tantra, yoga and austerities under various masters, notably Alara Kalama. His own\'a0realization\'a0though came from treading his own path with utmost steadfastness.\
You need not go looking for a guru, just stay sincere to your own path, to your practice of peace and love, of compassion and contentment; when you do that, the right guru will present himself out of nowhere. The providence arranges for it. Take my word for it. So is it necessary to surrender? And what if you cannot surrender? Read on.\
The truth is, it is not in your hands per se. What chance does frozen butter have in front of fire? If the fire is real, the butter will melt automatically. The right guru, with the fire of truth in his heart, with the warmth of compassion in his being, with the heat of\'a0
\i tapas
\i0 , penance,\'a0and his direct knowledge will melt you in no time. He will leave you with no option. Let alone just surrender, you will find yourself willing to do anything for him. He can inspire you to give up your life for a cause, with his mere presence he can empty you so you may be filled, he can soften you so you may be molded, he can transform you, with his one glance, he can wash ashore all your bottled up negativity, anguish and pain.\
Why do scriptures require showing due respect to a guru? Why are you expected to bow in front of him? Imagine two glasses, one is full of water and the other one is empty. If you have to transfer water from the one that is full to the empty one, the empty one must come a step below, the full glass needs to be higher so that the contents may be transferred. While living in the Himalayas, sometimes villagers would pass by carrying heavy bundles of wood on their head. They wanted to greet in the appropriate manner, befitting our culture, but because of the weight on their head, they were unable to bend down.\
Similarly, lot of people carry an enormous weight on their heads, weight of labels, of ego, of attainments, of bookish knowledge, of titles. Such burden makes it hard for them to bend, it stops them from surrendering. The right guru will decimate your ego without preaching you. So should you surrender or not is an empty question, a futile one. The question is: are you ready to transform yourself? If you are happy with yourself, why bother with all this master-disciple stuff! If you feel you need to work on yourself and you do not know how to go about it, well then you need to do whatever it takes to learn from the one you look up to.\
Imagine a deep wound. If someone has to clean and dress it, it is going to hurt a little. It will become a little itchy as it heals, thereafter it may leave a light scar for some time before\'a0disappearing\'a0completely. Provided, of course, the person dressing it is a bona fide medical professional. Similarly, when you allow someone, the right guru, to work on your ego, your shortcomings, it is going to hurt a little but eventually it will result in healing.\
A while ago, I wrote on the four pillars of\'a0
\i sadhana
\i0 , spiritual practice. It briefly touches base on the role of guru. You can read it\'a0{\field{\*\fldinst{HYPERLINK "http://www.omswami.com/2011/12/the-four-pillars-of-sadhana.html"}}{\fldrslt \cf4 here}}.\
Surrender requires putting aside one\'92s ego, it requires strength. Do not try to exercise surrender artificially, let it come from within. If you feel you should be surrendering but you are unable to, that is perfectly fine. Give yourself time. If the one in front of you deserves your submission, you will find yourself doing it automatically. As long as you are not disrespectful, you are good. Be free, be fearless.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\
How to overcome Negativity?\
The other day, someone asked me a simple yet important question. It is a question I get asked rather frequently, in fact. She said, \'93Sometimes I get so stressed due to an incident or a person, I become negative. No matter how hard I try to forgive and to forget but I\'92m unable to let go off the negative thoughts. What to do at that time? How to come out of it?\'94\
In the past, I have briefly touched upon how to\'a0overcome negative thoughts and emotions, the art of\'a0being positive\'a0and other related topics. In this post, let me share with you an actual technique you can adopt, almost like first-aid. You may slightly modify it to suit yourself and your surroundings. Before I spell out the method, allow me to shed some light on the underlying thesis.\
Emotions are the symptoms, they are not the cause. Please reread it: emotions are the symptoms, they are not the cause. Imagine it is a Friday afternoon and your co-workers invite you for a drink. You choose to go home instead to be with your partner. While driving back from work, you buy a pack of donuts. You envisage sharing them with the one who is already home. Let us say you two have a functional relationship, there is care, you share a bond, there is even some love \'97 in other words, it is a normal marriage. For some reason, he is cranky today. You too had a stressful day at work but you think of buying donuts and washing your stress with a light conversation and a few laughs over a coffee. You get home and the following conversation ensues after the initial howdies:\
\'93I\'92ve got donuts! Let\'92s pour a cuppa.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Oh, but I don\'92t feel like coffee.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93That\'92s alright, you can just have a donut or two,\'94 you respond with reduced enthusiasm.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Donuts? Now? It\'92s dinner time!\'94 he sounds irritated.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Well, that was that \'97 any possibility of happiness or positivity just got assaulted. Brutally. But let us examine the conversation. He is not irritated with you. Had you brought anything else, regardless of the conversation you picked, you would have gotten the same reaction. Because it was not about you or what you brought, it was just his own emotional state. What you witnessed were the symptoms. Donuts or the conversation were not the cause; they were immaterial, inconsequential. This is what I mean when I say emotions and feelings are symptomatic.\
You see, your day is made up of twenty-four hours, an hour constitutes sixty minutes, each minute has sixty seconds. So, your day is not just one day but a series of moments, thousands of them. The same goes for your thoughts and feelings too. When you are feeling bad, negative, it is not just one big unit, it is a chain of multiple thoughts, a queue of feelings. It is so interlinked that it appears indivisible, it feels like one cohesive unit, like multiple drops of water in a waterfall. Your emotions, therefore, are made up of a series of thoughts and feelings. Like the train changing its track can change the whole course, if you can learn the art of quieting your mind or diverting your thoughts, you can rise above any emotion. Is there a way to do it without the rigors of meditation? Yes; read on. Onto the method now:\
Talk to yourself, hold a self-dialog. Yes, this is it. It is an effective technique. The first step is to immediately be aware and accept that you are feeling negative. You do that by talking to yourself. Tell yourself that you are feeling negative and hurt presently. Remind yourself that you are a human being. It is perfectly normal for you to experience negative emotions, to feel down, to feel hurt, to feel pensive. It means you are human. Never be afraid to be human. Humanity is the path to divinity. Hold a communion with yourself. You actually have to hold the aforesaid self-dialog. When people are negative, they often hold long conversations in their head and that leads to greater negativity. We just have to change the nature of such dialog. Remind yourself that it is natural for you to feel stressed. Do not feel bad for feeling bad! Do not think you are a bad person just because you are feeling negative. Remove the other person from the equation, just focus on yourself. Do not try to stave off negativity, you will end up feeling even more negative and down.\
As soon as you become aware that you are negative and you accept it, the resistance will disappear. Resistance and conflict go hand-in-hand, you eliminate one and the other one self-destructs.\
Destroy the source of your negative emotions, not yourself. And no, the source is not the other person so you don\'92t need a bigger hammer. Although this post is not just about negativity in a marital relationship, yet I couldn\'92t resist but to share a quote by the comedian Rodney Dangerfield. It\'92s a light bite, you may just enjoy it. Here: \'93We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations; we\'92re doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.\'94\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\
How to Attract?\
You have probably heard and read about the law of attraction. To think about it, almost everyone is working to avoid suffering, they are working towards ever-elusive happiness, you are trying to attract the positives. No one wants negative people around them or adverse circumstances or calamities. How come they attract such things then? How come what you do not want you are attracting so easily whereas whatever you do want, you often have to work so hard for it. How unfair; or is it?\
Let me share with you a beautiful story from the Bhagavat Purana, a Hindu scripture narrating the glories of Krishna and his various incarnations. The story is also found in Mahabharata, another epic.\
Shishupala was a king who ruled the State of Chedi. He was also a cousin and a formidable foe of Krishna. Krishna had given a word to Shishupala\'92s mother that he would pardon one hundred misdeeds of Shishupala but beyond that he would not be able to forgive him for he was destined to be slain by him. Like many other fallen souls of his time, Shishupala hated Krishna, why, he loathed and detested him, day and night he thought about Krishna and ways of killing him. He desperately wanted Krishna to perish.\
Once in a royal\'a0
\i yajna
\i0 , sacred fire offerings, organized by Yuddhisthra \'97 Krishna\'92s cousin and a king, Shishupala and Krishna came face to face. He began swearing at Krishna while the latter kept smiling and warned him to stop lest he loved his life no more. Shishupala paid no heed and continued the slur. As soon as he swore a hundred times, Krishna raised his right hand, pointed up his index finger and the legendary discus, twirling in full glory, divine and daunting at once, appeared instantly like a bolt of lightening, a clap of thunder. He launched it and before Shishupala could even realize, his head was dislodged from his body. His lifeless body lay there next to his haughty head, blood oozing out in gushes. Deafening silence and silent dread filled the august assembly.\
Much to everyone\'92s amazement though, what followed was most unusual. All present in the royal court saw Shishupala\'92s soul merge in Krishna, the Supreme Soul. Obviously they were dumbstruck. How could that be? He did not love Krishna, did not see him as an incarnation of Godhead, why, he despised him. Yuddhisthra, still in a state of shock, asked Narada, the divine wandering itinerant, \'93O Sage! Shishupala was jealous of Krishna. He hated him but how come his soul merged in Krishna? It is rare even for the yogins who fervently worship Him with extreme reverence, concentration and devotion. How come he got bestowed with such rare fortune?\'94\
Narada smiled and said, \'93O Noble King! Shishupala merged in Krishna because he meditated on Him every moment of his life. Whether you meditate on something out of hatred or love, that is beside the point. Your mind does not distinguish between negative and positive, right and wrong, they are two sides of the same coin, it simply manifests whatever you hold onto. His whole consciousness was directed towards Krishna and that\'92s the sole reason he merged in Him.\'94\
There is your law of attraction! It is the reason why negative people are able to give you enough examples of their fears actually coming true in their lives. It is why even crooks can be ultra successful. Nobility of intention is not a concept your mind understands. It is the concentration of a thought that matters, the more concentrated a thought, the stronger it is. From the perspective of manifestation, moral purity is not the most important factor, it is the intensity and persistence of the thought. Whatever you focus on resolutely, without any doubts in your mind, it starts to manifest in your life. Of course, your actions aid that manifestation.\
Working towards a positive goal you have many doubts. Whereas negative is always there, present in your subconscious. You are not to be blamed though. It is the result of evolution. Our species has worked hard for its survival. It mostly lived in the fear of extinction. The total human population is minuscule compared to animals. Anyway, so the mind tends to cling to the negative, you feel strongly about negative.\
Whether love or hate, they are still emotions. It is when you are indifferent, you do not attract \'97 desirable or otherwise. In a deeply profound and revealing quote by Elie Wiesel, a holocaust survivor and a Nobel Peace Laureate, he states:\
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\f2 \cf3 The opposite of love is not hate, it\'92s indifference.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The opposite of art is not ugliness, it\'92s indifference.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The opposite of faith is not heresy, it\'92s indifference.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 And the opposite of life is not death, it\'92s indifference between life and death.\cb1 \
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\f1 \cf2 \cb10 And what is the ingredient to double the strength of a positive thought? Faith. For tripling it? Persistence. How to quadruple it? Purity of the intention. Go figure!Whatever you feel strongly about, you will attract. For anything you have an emotion for, you will attract it in your life. You hate something strongly, that is all you will get. You love something strongly, that is all you will notice. If you hate people you do not want in your life, time and again, they are the ones you will encounter at every nook and turn of your life. You have as much chance of attracting something you hate as things you love. With negativity, fear comes uninvited. The strength of a negative thought is doubled by fear. It is tripled by self-doubt, quadrupled by attachment.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\
What is Beautiful?\
What is beautiful? Something that is attractive, pleasing to look at? Or is there more to it? When it comes to the first impression, no doubt, external appearance can make an immediate mark. If you look at a pretty woman or a handsome man, it is only natural to find them appealing. Regardless of your marital, social or religious status, you cannot artificially deny their external beauty. Pretty pathetic should you do that, if you ask me. That said, if external beauty was all that irresistible why would there be any breakups among the stars, luminaries and the well endowed? Allow me to help you reflect on the notion, definition and concept of beauty. I read a story once. I am quoting it verbatim. As follows:\
An elderly woman and her little grandson, whose face was sprinkled with bright freckles, spent the day at the zoo. Many children were waiting in line to get their cheeks painted by a local artist who was decorating them with tiger paws.\
\'93You\'92ve got so many freckles, there\'92s no place to paint!\'94 a girl in the line said to the little fella.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Embarrassed, perhaps hurt, the little boy dropped his head.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 His grandmother knelt down next to him. \'93I love your freckles. When I was a little girl I always wanted freckles,\'94 she said while tracing her finger across the child\'92s cheek. \'93Freckles are beautiful.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The boy looked up. \'93Really?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Of course,\'94 said the grandmother. \'93Why, just name me one thing that\'92s prettier than freckles.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The young kid thought for a moment, peered intensely into his grandma\'92s face and whispered: \'93Wrinkles.\'94\
Aww\'85 that\'92s so sweet, right? But will you marry or even look after the grandmother for her wrinkles? Probably not. Will you see the same beauty in her wrinkles as did the little boy? Only if you are that boy. However, it is not about that. Beauty cannot be chained by a string of words or some definition because what is beautiful is never about them, it is about you. It is not absolute, it is relative, relative to your state of mind, to your own perception. Whatever you connect with you will find it beautiful! With whoever you feel secure and complete, you will find that person beautiful. That is why, the wrinkles may truly be the most beautiful thing for the little boy because he shares a bond with his grandmother.\
The youthful Mulla Nasrudin was determined to marry a beautiful young girl from a poor family. His father wanted him to marry someone rich. \'93What\'92s wrong with you?\'94 he said, \'93the beauty that\'92s blinded you is only skin-deep.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93That\'92s deep enough for me,\'94 Mulla replied. \'93I\'92m not a cannibal.\'94\
I find this joke amusing but it also makes a persuasive point: beauty is what matters to you. It is your own reflection. As you progress in life, intellectually and emotionally, your priorities change. What you find pretty at fifteen, you may not find it half as beautiful when you are thirty. As you understand yourself better, the importance of just external beauty declines in your eyes. It does not mean the visual appeal of something or someone beautiful diminishes in your eyes, it just means you place greater value on other traits. Mostly. In the words of Khalil Gibran: Beauty is eternity gazing at itself in a mirror.\
Swami Vivekananda, the awesome and brilliant monk, clad in his saffron robe, was taking a stroll in Chicago. The year was 1893. The outfit seemed unusual. A couple, dressed in formals, were ranging the same sidewalk as him and the lady said to her man, \'93I don\'92t think he\'92s a gentleman.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Her statement reached Swami\'92s ears. He went up to the couple and said, \'93Excuse me for I overheard your remark. In your country, the tailor makes a man gentleman but in my country, it is the character.\'94 I don\'92t know what happened afterwards and it\'92s immaterial in the current context. But was the woman right in her thinking? And was Swami right in his response? Actually, it does not matter. The lady expressed what she felt and she did so not directly to Vivekananda but to her partner.\
If you retain the right to carry yourself however you like, let others have the freedom to form their opinions. Media, society, advertising, religion, they all bombard you with stereotypes, sometimes subtly and many a time explicitly. The more you let others\'92 opinions matter to you, the more you move away from your internal source of happiness. Besides, albeit on an extraneous note, I am doubtful if Vivekananda\'92s statement holds much truth in the contemporary India where corruption, at all levels and in all sectors, is more an accepted way of life than a grave governance issue.\
Unfortunately, it almost seems that anyone who gets the opportunity is ready to plunder. Whether that\'92s a businessperson trying to dodge the taxes, or the employee polishing his time sheet, or a government worker who doesn\'92t mind openly asking for his cut or kickbacks. People who are honest, not because of fear and governance but out of morality and choice, are rare gems. There are many workers of honesty but a few volunteers. There may be an emotional denial to my statement but the facts are staring right into the truth \'97 and it is not beautiful to the sane eyes. I enjoyed this little digression, let me get back to the matter at hand:\
\'93Why do you want a divorce?\'94 the judge asked the young man.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Your Honor,\'94 he said, \'93I can\'92t stand her when I\'92m sober and she can\'92t stand me when I\'92m drunk.\'94\
When someone does not find you beautiful, please know that it is mostly about them.\'a0(Hope you don\'92t interpret this as a moral of the joke.) While you may change a little to work a common ground to see what the other person likes, but beyond that, there is not much you can do. If you want to win approvals of others, if that is what moves you, well then, you better dress, behave and be the way they want. If you vainly want to keep the world happy, you have to play a puppet in its inept and clumsy hands. You pay for the dress but the strings come attached at no charge.\
If for a moment though, you remove external affirmations from the equation, if you eliminate their acceptance from your perception about you, how will you behave, what will you do? In my opinion, that is how you ought to look at yourself. It is infinitely more important to find yourself beautiful when you look in the mirror than for others to find you pretty when they look at your picture. No one is looking at you with naked eyes; who you are and what they see is out of sync. Their sight is filtered by their lenses of beliefs, perceptions and desires. They see what they want to see \'97 this is where beauty loses its independence. Learn not to bother. It\'92s worth it. As long as you are honest with yourself and you are doing your best, you are just fine. A long post, this. Oh! even beauty can be a drag.\
If you can complement yourself, you can complete yourself. When you feel complete, when your cup fills up, everything looks beautiful. Beautiful is what you connect with, what matters to you. You are beautiful.\
Go on, tell someone how spectacular they are and how they have made your life beautiful! Once done, repeat it in the mirror. Don\'92t tell me you haven\'92t yet fallen in love with yourself.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\
It\'92s okay to change?\
Change is constant \'97 you must have heard it numerous times before. Constancy of change is not just true for the physical world outside but your inner world too. As your thoughts change, so does your viewpoint and with a different perspective, you gain a new understanding. And that automatically brings about a change in your emotional state, in your beliefs; you evolve, you grow, sometimes you grow out. Most people don\'92t let themselves evolve, they just revolve. They keep going round and round in circles, the same old problems, patterns, same old issues, same old responses, reactions, same old grudges. That\'92s not because they don\'92t wish to change but because they deny the internal change.\
As we live through more days, as we learn from our experiences, our opinions are bound to change. The society, the world you move in, lets you change only certain opinions but not all. For example, as a child you are made to believe that Santa Claus exists. When you grow up, it is accepted to believe that it was all a setup, that there was never a real Santa. You discover it yourself. You realize that it was someone else\'92s invention, your parents, elders \'93created\'94 him for you.\
Your own discovery gives you the strength and conviction to believe that Santa was a manufacture, an invention. Why is it easy in Santa\'92s case? Because you stop getting the physical gifts. I don\'92t think it is because of the lack of chimneys. When physical manifestation, the miraculous appearing of gifts stop, you question naturally. Had the proposition been that Santa comes and gives you peace and joy, it would have been hard, almost impossible, to deny his existence. Why? Because you could neither prove nor disprove it.\
And this leads me to the crux of the matter: you are only allowed to change your belief where a tangible and an\'a0unambiguous\'a0physical proof is available to support your stand. The society does not allow you to question, much less change, your beliefs about your god, your religion, your rituals, at least not freely. A sense of guilt is instilled, you start to think perhaps something is wrong with you, you should not be an atheist or you should not be attracted to other systems of life and inquiry and so on and so forth. You are expected to believe in your Siva, your Jesus, your Allah; you are not allowed to question your belief. There is a subtle, constant and significant pressure on you.\
The example of religion is just that, an example. People tend to behave the same in their selection of political parties, leaders, sects, cults etc. The keyword here is behave. Religion is a behavior, a programmed behavior that comes naturally after a while. Most of your actions spring from your behavior. And your natural behavior is simply an automatic response system; it is based on what, how, and how much you have been fed. Is there anything wrong with it? Not necessarily; you decide for yourself.\
Getting back to my present subject of change: if you cling to a belief, an opinion you once had but no longer believe it to be true, you are simply putting greater burden on yourself. When you practice what you do not believe, the underlying currents of non-fulfillment turn into the tides of great unrest. When you are not at peace within, you get irritated, angry, hurt, you are affected easily even by petty things, minor issues. These are symptomatic. These happen when you are denying yourself the change that has already matured in you. When you recognize and accept your internal change, you experience a sense of freedom, a feeling of lightness sweeps you away.\
No reasonable, sane or intelligent person can consistently hold the same belief at all times. A rigid consistency of beliefs show either you are no longer listening to yourself or you are not accepting what your inner voice is telling you. Holding onto a belief is not the same as holding a belief. See the difference. The expectation of consistency is a societal pressure placed on you by the average thinkers in the ordinary world. Such thinkers, by the way, make up ninety-nine percent of our world. If you don\'92t believe me, just take a look around. Objectively. To paraphrase the thoughts of David Wallace: you will worry less about what people think about you when you realize how little they do.\
On a dark winter morning, Mulla Nasrudin\'92s guest said to him, \'93You\'92re so fortunate that you don\'92t have to go to the mosque in this chilly cold outside.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Tell me about it!\'94 said Mulla. \'93Thank God, I\'92m an atheist these days.\'94\
Let go of whatever binds you. Be at ease with the change within you. Accept yourself.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\
The value of Nothing\
Let me start with a Taoist story. Two men, a woodcutter and his apprentice were passing through a jungle. They came across a huge banyan tree. Like some heavenly object, it stood majestically. Its trunk was wide, its boughs covered a large periphery, a myriad of long aerial roots almost touched the ground; all in all, an ancient tree.\
The young apprentice was only too excited. \'93Look at this tree,\'94 he said. \'93We need not go any further. This alone can give us the wood we need.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The experienced woodcutter threw a cursory glance at the tree and did not even bother stopping. \'93This tree is too old and hard for my ax,\'94 he replied. \'93The roots are useless and the branches are way too large.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93It\'92s worthless. It has nothing for us, son,\'94 he added, \'93but you know that is the secret of its long life.\'94\
The world can\'92t affect you when you stand firmly rooted like the ancient banyan tree. Or, it leaves you alone when it doesn\'92t see value in you. All through one\'92s life, one is searching for things of value, of worth. First, we are conditioned to value certain things more than others. Then we chase them. The struggle in the process makes the attainment look worthwhile. And finally, we work hard to retain them. We like to preserve what we value. Often, the more effort it takes to attain something, the more valuable it feels. It\'92s natural. Think about it. For example, after much toil, it takes someone a year to save a thousand dollars, its value is much greater to him compared with the one who saves that much in a day. The first one has paid a greater price to save those one thousand dollars. What and how you value something is often based on how you price it.\
When you learn to value things that are usually \'93nothing\'94 for the world, you move closer to your inner source of strength. What is practically worthless to most are the prized possessions of a yogi. For example: everyone breathes. It\'92s no rocket science. Most take it for granted but a yogi understands breath, he tames his breath. The world doesn\'92t think much of it but it is a feat for the yogi. The bliss is everlasting when it is not conditional, when it is not based on having or losing something. How can you be blissful without attainments? Well, that\'92s the whole realization. That\'92s not all though. Self-realized people have another important quality. It\'92s not about meditation or adhering to some tradition, that has barely any connection with the transcendental state. Once again, let me share another anecdote.\
In Hinduism, cows are considered sacred, worthy of worship. Predominantly because, cows were an integral part of human life at one stage. Dairy products provided the nutrition, dried cow dung was used as fuel, bulls tilled the farms, drew water from the wells, they transported people and goods. Cows were like pets and more. In our story, set in India, a pig and a cow were talking:\
\'93Why do people worship you but detest me?,\'94 said the pig. \'93After all, every single part of my body is used when I\'92m slaughtered. Shouldn\'92t I be the sacred one?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The cow said, \'93There\'92s a difference between you and I. \'a0I serve when I\'92m alive whereas you do it after you\'92re dead.\'94\
The second sign of an enlightened person is his willingness and capacity to serve selflessly. You maybe a businessperson or a householder, a believer or an atheist, dressed in a robe or in a business suit, it\'92s immaterial. What matters is what you are doing for others. Religions, traditions, labels are merely different lifestyles, different perspectives, at the most different belief systems, not much beyond that. Self-realization, however, is where the conditioned beliefs die. This is where it all begins.\
Someone offers you gold, you value it at nothing. Someone offers you garbage, you price it at nothing. Someone offers you nothing, you still value it because it is no longer about what you are offered or denied. This is the path of\'a0
\i samata
\i0 , evenness. When nothing is of value to you, everything becomes worthless and when you learn to value \'93nothing\'94, everything life gives you feels priceless. Detachment and dispassion arise naturally. For, you only cling to what you think is worth something, anything. The degree of attachment is directly proportional to the value you place on the object of your attachment. A self-realized person\'92s most valuable basket contains nothing. Therefore, what will such a person be attached to? Nothing.\
What do you value in your life? People, stuff, everything, nothing?\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\
Fear of the Dark\
Everyone has fear, only the degree varies. It is innate, it forms part of our survival mechanism for it triggers the fight-or-flight response. Allow me to begin with a question I was asked the other day. A wonderful lady, mother of two young ones, said, \'93My son is afraid of the dark. What should I do?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Who isn\'92t?\'94 I said. \'93Let him be. Has he ever been so scared that he wet his pants?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93No. He\'92s never done that.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93So, what\'92s the problem? Were you not scared of the dark when you were a child? Won\'92t you be afraid if you have to explore an unknown terrain at night? Familiarity eases fear. Your son gets scared because he\'92s still exploring the world. He has imagination well alive in his world. If he believes in Santa Claus, he may as well believe in ghosts too. When you read those fascinating fairy tales and religious stories of celestial beings to him, you create an imprint of myth in his mind. It\'92s only natural then that he expects ghosts and demons in the dark. But I\'92m not saying stop reading out those stories to him. Just accept fear as a natural emotion in your child. Over time, Nature will teach him. Don\'92t tell him not to be afraid of the dark because there are only two words he\'92ll remember from your instruction \'97 afraid and dark. Consequently, when in the dark, he\'92ll automatically think fear. Instead, tell him to turn on the light.\'94\
Fear is not just a feeling but an emotion. It is tightly linked to our evolution. A sperm joins an egg in the dark. A fetus spends nine months in the dark. It has no control over its own life. It is helpless, almost immobile. It is fed whatever the mother intakes. It cannot accept or reject anything. There is no freedom, it\'92s tied to the umbilical cord. That phantom feeling still exists even when one is well out in this world. Even practically, dark means you can no longer see. What you cannot see becomes unknown. Your mind triggers a fear-signal because it cannot plan tackling the unknown. You can only defend against what you can comprehend. So, in the dark, a feeling of helplessness gains prominence because we don\'92t know what we may be up against.\
Imagine coming back to your home well into the night. You approach the main door to unlock only to find out someone broke in while you were away. You feel scared naturally. What if the person is still inside? What if he is armed? What if they are a group and so forth. These questions and many more race through the head. Even after you have turned on the lights and ensured all is well, a creepy feeling lives on for months that someone has been through your home in your absence, without your permission, without your knowledge. You feel your defense has been breached. They know you but you don\'92t know them. Fear. Natural.\
If you are going to bring up your children talking about nymphs, fairies, spirits, ghosts, demons, angels and the rest, you are invariably telling them there are beings they cannot see. And when they actually can\'92t see in the dark, scary images automatically crop up in their mind. They know angels are not going to appear in the dark because children\'92s books often show plenty of light around angels, whereas evil beings are shown in the dark. This is conditioning. This blemishes their pure minds with nonexistent artifacts. But Life teaches them and over time they learn how this world is full of fiction. This empirical wisdom and learning helps them to overcome the fear of dark.\
\'93Johnny, can you quickly get me the broom from the garden?\'94 said the mother at night.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93But, I\'92m scared of the dark, mommy,\'94 said Johnny. \'93There are ghosts outside.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Have faith in God, Johnny. God is everywhere and he\'92s stronger than ghosts.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Are you sure God\'92s in the garden as well?\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Positive. And he\'92s watching out for you. Now, go get me the sweeper.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 The little Johnny opened the door slightly, stretched out his arm and said, \'93Please pass me the broom, God. Mommy says you are in the garden.\'94\
Grown ups can give themselves false affirmations, they can be clever to deny ghosts but accept God. You have already learned to bend the truth as per your own convenience. A child has absolute imagination though. As they get more conditioned, they will learn the tricks too. Sad.\
When reality outgrows imagination, fear disappears, for fear is always anticipatory. Yes, always. The present moment has no fear, it\'92s when you start to think what may happen in the next moment can you have any fear at all. I was hoping to cover the types of fear in this post. Something for another day.\
Be here now. Be free, be fearless.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
\
Readers of all ages write to me regarding boredom. Some are bored from their routines, others from their partners and many are bored from their lives altogether. Notably, parents ask me what to tell their children when they don\'92t want to study citing the reason they are bored. I classify boredom into two categories: lazy boredom and active boredom. In either case, your mind wants you to move away from the object of boredom. You lose sharpness of the mind when you experience boredom, it makes you either restless or lazy. I have seen hundreds who start fidgeting with things and many start wobbling their legs when they are bored. The boredom is subtle but significant in this case. You don\'92t shake your legs when watching a thriller or reading a good book, for example.\cb1 \
\cb10 Often, when boredom is due to lack of interest, it makes one sleepy, the mind starts to slow down as if preparing itself for sleep. This is lazy boredom. This is what happens, before you go to sleep, your mind begins to slow down, a mind racing with thoughts, the one swelled up with emotions, needs to calm down. However, when you feel bored because your environment fails to stimulate you, you become fidgety. It makes you restless. This is active boredom. It means your mind is active and wants to be engaged elsewhere, where there is something new for it, some other stimulation of a different type.\
Personally, I believe there is nothing wrong in feeling bored. If boredom was such a bane, we would still be in the stone age. Somewhere in our evolution and growth, boredom played a significant role. Some of the greatest inventions did not just take place out of necessity but because someone was bored, they wanted something new. If necessity is the mother of invention, boredom may well be the father. Because boredom triggers the need for innovation. If you feel sleepy when you are bored, it means you need to stimulate your mind and find something that may interest you. However, if what you are doing is important and you cannot afford to get bored, take it easy. Revisit your subject after refreshing your mind. Just like in meditation, everyone has a limit. Some start to feel bored within the first ten minutes, many can go on for thirty minutes and so forth. With conscious effort you can raise your limit of boredom!\
Boredom means you are not just an animal without intellect, it means you have been blessed with intelligence and thinking power. It particularly holds true for those who feel restless when bored. They are intertwined: restlessness feeds boredom and boredom fuels restlessness. There are two interesting things you should know about boredom. Let me elaborate with an anecdote.\
Committed to the practice of meditation but not getting anywhere, a disciple approached his master and said,\'94I\'92m feeling really bored and restless. I\'92m unable to meditate.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Don\'92t worry, don\'92t react. It\'92ll pass. Don\'92t lose your resolve. Stay course,\'94 the guru said.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Another few weeks later he sounded really excited and said, \'93Oh, I\'92m having the greatest time of my life. Meditation has never been so good.\'94\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 \'93Don\'92t get high, don\'92t react. It\'92ll pass too. Don\'92t lose sight of your path. Stay course,\'94 replied the guru.\
Clearly, this is true not just for meditation but many other aspects too. People get bored in relationships, in jobs, in their lives and so on. \'a0The first thing you need to know about boredom is that it is cyclical and it is temporary. When you get bored of something you cannot escape, practice acceptance and alertness with resolve and you will get over the boredom in no time. There is little or no boredom where there is attachment and devotion. A mother rarely gets bored of her child but the restless child can get bored of his mother quickly. Eventually, it boils down to your priorities.\
The second thing you should know about boredom: you choose to be bored. Yes, this is true. When you let your restless mind take you over, you feel fidgety and bored. And when your lazy mind overpowers you, you feel sleepy and bored. It\'92s as simple as that. If you start regarding boredom as a good thing, your mind will stop retaliating. It requires awareness, that you become aware that you are getting bored, you become your own witness. Acceptance and alertness when bored helps you to overcome lazy boredom. Awareness and relaxation helps you overcome restless boredom.\
It is okay to be bored sometimes. Accept it. Be at ease with it. If you want to overcome it, do so with awareness. In my months of solitude in the Himalayas, when there was no electricity, no one else to talk to, no piles of books, no music, not even birds, only snow and white snow around, I did not allow myself to get bored. I simply meditated. When tired of meditation, I practiced contemplation and when tired of contemplation, I did meditation. If you are committed to discipline, boredom can\'92t touch you because boredom is mostly an excuse and rarely the reason. A bored mind is a devil\'92s workshop. In the words of the phenomenal British thinker, Bertrand Russell:\'a0Boredom is a vital problem for the moralist, since half the sins of mankind are caused by the fear of it.\
Once you get past the wave of boredom, you will find yourself in an ocean of bliss. Your intellect becomes razor sharp and rising to the surface of your very being, it grants you insight.\
Peace.\cb1 \uc0\u8232 \cb10 Swami\
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