test: add multi- and recursive-relationship E2Es, refactor test utils

[palpatim]

Description of changes

This change adds E2Es to follow up on #2533

Additional changes

• Refactor durations into a shared test utility, use throughout CDK tests; refactored some shared CDK test setups into their respective test implementation files
  • This refactor is responsible for the bulk of the file changes. You can view it separately in 86d0be3. Despite the size, I'm including it in this change so we can get the new duration handling into tests that we'll subsequently copy/paste.
• Refactor configurable-stack to use a StackConfig structure for passing configs like prefix and an option to use the sandbox
• Removed configurable-sandbox-stack since StackConfig now controls sandbox in configurable-stack
• Add an optional postDeployWaitMs parameter to the CDK deploy script to allow tests to opt-in to a wait period to let resources finalize/propagate. This is a naive attempt to make the CDK-based SQL tests more stable by imitating the wait that we do during SQL database setup to let security group settings change. The justification is that many of the SQL failures I see locally are due to Unable to retrieve secret for database connection from Secrets Manager... errors. My hypothesis is that the secrets manager VPC service endpoint hasn't fully resolved by the time we start the test, because a subsequent test run in the same project works as expected.
  • Update: Hard to know if this helped or not. We still saw one persistent failure in references-sqlprimary-sqlrelated.test.ts that looks like the secrets manager timeout, so I'm not convinced this really fixes things. I'd like to leave it in for now and continue investigating.

Checklist

• PR description included
• yarn test passes
• Tests are changed or added
• E2E tests pass
  • assoc_field failed because of a timeout in the cdk destroy section, but all tests passed
  • references-sqlprimary-sqlrelated.test.ts failed because of the recurring failure when a project is first set up, but passes locally

By submitting this pull request, I confirm that my contribution is made under the terms of the Apache 2.0 license.

[palpatim]

marker review