When you see someone starting up their Big Vim, you can be pretty sure that an Adventure is going to happen.
Piglet: "Oh Pooh, we will edit text forever, won't we?"
Vimmy the Pooh: "Even longer"
.
"When you first wake up in the morning, Pooh," said Piglet at last, "what's the
first thing you say to yourself?"
"What to edit?" said Vimmy the Pooh. "What do you say, Piglet?"
"I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?" said Piglet.
Pooh nodded thoughtfully. "It's the same thing," he said.
.
"Well," said Vimmy the Pooh, "what I like best," and then he had to stop
and think. Because although Editing Text was a very good thing to do, there
was a moment just before you began to type which was better than when you
were, but he didn't know what it was called.
.
"I wonder what #vim is doing," thought Vimmy the Pooh.
"I wish I were there to be doing it, too."
.
"Emacs is clever," said Vimmy the Pooh thoughtfully.
"Yes," said Piglet, "Emacs is clever."
"And he has Everything."
"Yes," said Piglet, "Emacs has Everything."
There was a long silence.
"I suppose," said Pooh, "that that's why he never edits anything."
.
"I did know once, only I've sort of forgotten. I bet :help remembers. I'll
ask him."
.
A vimmer, however hard he tries, grows tardy without practice.
.
Vimmy the Pooh looked at his modes. He knew that one of them was the normal
mode, and he knew that when you had decided which one of them was normal,
then the other one was insert, but he never could remember how to begin.
.
"That's what #vimmers always do," said Vimmy the Pooh, much interested.
"They call ':help! :help!' and then when you look up, they don't panic."
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"Pooh, do you think we could use Vim for editing more types of files?"
Vimmy the Pooh replied, "I should think so, Piglet."
.
Piglet fidgeted with his keyboard for a while and then quietly asked,
"How do I copy your vimrc, Pooh?"
"You don't," said Vimmy the Pooh, "you create your own."
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Some people talk to Vim. Not many listen though. That's the problem.
.
"He's editing still," said Eeyore gloomily.
"So he is." Vimmy the Pooh observed politely.
"And committing."
"Is he?"
"Yes," said Eeyore.
"However," he said, brightening up a little, "we haven't had an issue
logged lately."
.
"Oh, :help!" said Vimmy the Pooh. "I'd better find out."
"Oh, google!" said Pooh. "I shall have to learn more."
"I don't know!" said Pooh. "Oh, :help and google!"
.
"How would it be," said Vimmy the Pooh slowly, "if we delete this function
and try to write a different one?"
"What's the good of that?" said Rabbit.
"Well," said Pooh, "we keep looking for a Solution and not finding it, so I
thought that if we looked for the solution to another problem, we'd be sure
not to find it, which would be a Good Thing, because then we might find
something that we weren't looking for, which might be just what we were
looking for, really."
"I don't see much sense in that," said Rabbit.
"No," said Pooh humbly, "there isn't. But there was going to be when I
began it. It's just that something happened to it on the way."
.
"Supposing Vim crashed, Pooh, while we were using it?"
"Supposing it didn't," said Vimmy the Pooh after careful thought.
Piglet was comforted by this.
.
The wonderful thing about Vim
Is Vim is a wonderful thing
Its edits are made out of modes
Its :help will make you sing
It's typey, writey, mighty, flighty fun, fun, fun, fun, fun!
But the most wonderful thing about Vim is it's the only one
It's the only one.
.
"Pooh! Rabbit just wrote a new plugin manager called VimAddonNeoBundleW00t!",
squeaked Piglet excitedly.
Oh, Clever Rabbit, thought Vimmy the Pooh.
"Which plugin manager do you use, Pooh?"
"Pathogen" muttered Pooh.
"But, it doesn't have :BundlesOfJoy" exclaimed Piglet, "and you can't..."
he began to say but stopped when Pooh looked up from his keyboard.
"I am a Vimmer of Very Little Patience, and complicated plugin
managers bother me."
.
Piglet wondered if Pooh was listening but was too scared to ask him as he
wouldn't want to interrupt his vimming, so he quietly continued telling his
story about needing a cheer for "team #vim". Piglet was careful to watch Pooh's
face to know when he should stop.
Vimmy the Pooh typed a command and then another. He enjoyed the way they rolled
off his fingers; the way the click of the keys echoed his thoughts. He loved
being in this mode. He was enjoying editing text, and he was aware that he was
enjoying it. He typed some more and smiled.
Piglet stopped talking. Pooh leant back in his chair and stretched his back and
then his neck and then his fingers. And then he gazed at Piglet and, still
smiling, said: "Vim feels good, like an editor should." And then he let out a
deep sigh and stared past Piglet's head off into the distance, his mind lost in
Vim.
Piglet's eyes widened and his mouth made the shapes of Pooh's words as he
repeated the phrase over and over in his mind.
Finally, in a triumphant squeal that startled Pooh, Piglet jumped up and cried
out: "#vim has taught, like a chat room aught!"
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