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A Curseword-Based Scale for Temperature

5,400 geolocated tweets with phrases like "it's hot as hell" or "it's cold as a bitch" were collected from August 2017 to January 2018, and the outdoor temperature collected for each.

The result is a derived curseword-based temperature scale: "it's hot as hell" is 86°F, statistically speaking.

By @jimwebb, and presented at Hack and Tell DC (Presentation: Keynote | PDF). Thanks to @metasemantic for inspiration and code.

Observed median temperature, by phrase (n>10)

All Temps

Most popular phrases and median temperatures (°F)

Phrase Count Median Temp (°F)
(it's) cold as fuck 623 41°F
cold as shit 497 45°F
cold as hell 466 48°F
cold as balls 78 37°F
cold as a bitch 43 37°F
--------------------------- ------- ---------------
hot as hell 549 86°F
hot as fuck 495 86°F
hot as shit 261 86°F
hot as balls 197 84°F
hotter than hell 58 85°F

Detail: hot subjects (n>5)

Displayed with frequency, median (black) and 95% confidence (gray)

Hot phrases

Detail: cold subjects (n>5)

Displayed with frequency, median (black) and 95% confidence (gray)

Cold phrases

"Hell" can be hot or cold

"Cold as hell" (48°F) and "hot as hell" (86°F) exist together, and hell isn't the only subject with this duality:

Phrase When Hot (°F) When Cold (°F)
dick 92 36
satan's balls 90 34
a witch's tit 90 26
a bitch 89 38
a mf 88 42
a mother 88 29
ever 87 59
f 87 45
tits 85 40
shit 85 45
hell 85 47
fuck 84 41
balls 84 36
heck 78 28

"Boogers" are always cold; "The Devil's Dick" is always hot

Some subjects are used in one context (either hot or cold), but not both. "Boogers" and "Mars" are always cold; "the devil's dick" and "two rats (fucking)" are always hot:

Hot/Cold Bias

Data set

Dataset provided in data/collected-tweets.csv; tweets with temperatures added are a SQLite database, in data/collected-tweets.db. Contact me for raw tweets (250MB).

Data collection

python src/

Requires an empty folder in the local directory named raw_firehose and a file named access_tokens.json with your Twitter API keys:



Set up SQLite database for processing (one-time)

php src/1-dbsetup.php

Parse the tweets and organize by phrasing

php src/2-collect-tweets.php

Poll the Dark Sky API for temperatures (edit file with your Dark Sky API key)

php src/3-get-weather.php


A descriptive temperature scale, based on tweets that read "it's (hot/cold) as ______"



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