Tweaks to impostor syndrome post.

Confronting-Impostor-Syndrome.post

@@ -12,28 +12,33 @@ in the software industry create or exacerbate this feeling in most of us.
 I read Joel Spolsky's Java Schools article way back when, before I was really programming.
 I looked down on Web Dev for a long time. I played with lisp, played with emulation.
 ... But I've been a professional web dev. Why am I fighting it and being hard on myself
-for not being a systems programmer? Why do I keep flogging myself for not being the best
-web dev when I don't embrace it and not knowing systems programming because I haven't put
-the time into it?
+for not being a systems programmer?
+
+I flogged myself for some time, a little voice in my head saying that web devlopment
+"isn't real programming". I would flog myself for not being good at web development
+when I hadn't embraced it. I would flog myself for not being knowing systems programming
+when I haven't put any time into it.
 
 Sure, there's plenty I still don't know. But "I don't know but I can figure it out" is the
-right instinct. Trying a bunch of stuff and not finishing is vastly better than paralysis.
-Exploring *any* ecosystem and building better apps is better than trying not to "touch the web".
+right instinct to have. Trying a bunch of stuff and not finishing is vastly better than paralysis.
+Exploring *any* ecosystem and building better apps is better than misguided elitism.
 
 **I'm a hacker**, through and through. I want to learn, want to improve, want to synthesize
 new things from my understanding, grow, share, and change. I looked up to the hackers of lisp
 lore and AI Labs. But that hero worship has become negative, is distracting me from just
 building things.
 
-I used to "listen to Spolsky" because I thought I didn't have a chance in this industry.
-I've been a successful developer for years but unable to enjoy my jobs because I've been
-too uncomfortable to *embrace* web development. Then feared I'll be found out as a fraud,
+Part of the reason that little voice is in my head (and I listened to it for so long)
+is because I thought I didn't have a chance in this industry.
+
+I've been a successful developer for years but often unable to enjoy my jobs because
+I've been too uncomfortable to *embrace* them. Then feared I'll be found out as a fraud,
 not a "real programmer".
 
 I've been telling my students that since they understand the major components in web development
 and have some understanding of how they fit together, their real focus to grow should be practice.
 Constantly building bigger things, trying to make each piece more cleanly than in the past,
 gradually knowing how to solve harder and harder problems.
 
-I stopped taking my own advice at some point. It's time to build new things. Bigger things.
-Things I share with the world. Not the prettiest or the best, but real.
+I stopped taking my own advice at some point. It's time to build new things again.
+Bigger things. Not the prettiest or the best, but real.