Close SSLEngine when connection fails.

Motivation:
When using the JdkSslEngine, the ALPN class is used keep a reference
to the engine.   In the event that the TCP connection fails, the
SSLEngine is not removed from the map, creating a memory leak.

Modification:
Always close the SSLEngine regardless of if the channel became
active.  Also, record the SSLEngine was closed in all places.

Result:
Fixes: grpc/grpc-java#3080

handler/src/main/java/io/netty/handler/ssl/SslHandler.java

@@ -1510,6 +1510,7 @@ private void setHandshakeFailure(ChannelHandlerContext ctx, Throwable cause, boo
         try {
             // Release all resources such as internal buffers that SSLEngine
             // is managing.
+            outboundClosed = true;
             engine.closeOutbound();
 
             if (closeInbound) {
@@ -1557,6 +1558,9 @@ private void notifyClosePromise(Throwable cause) {
 
     private void closeOutboundAndChannel(
             final ChannelHandlerContext ctx, final ChannelPromise promise, boolean disconnect) throws Exception {
+        outboundClosed = true;
+        engine.closeOutbound();
+
         if (!ctx.channel().isActive()) {
             if (disconnect) {
                 ctx.disconnect(promise);
@@ -1566,9 +1570,6 @@ private void closeOutboundAndChannel(
             return;
         }
 
-        outboundClosed = true;
-        engine.closeOutbound();
-
         ChannelPromise closeNotifyPromise = ctx.newPromise();
         try {
             flush(ctx, closeNotifyPromise);