sql: add observability for SQL queries that require all nodes to complete

[lunevalex]

Is your feature request related to a problem? Please describe.

CockroachDB already has a number of tools to track queries that perform a full table scan and highlght to users that they should consider optimizing such a query. Recently in a customer escalation we observed a pattern when there were a number of queries that needed every single node in the cluster to be available to complete, which could be equally problematic for a customer workload. There should be a way for the customer to identify, as they could be detrimental to the application stability. It is not quite clear what a customer should do when they find this pattern, as it's going to be very workload dependent, but observability is a start.

Describe the solution you'd like
The ask is two-fold:

• Improve the SQL observability tool set to be able to surface queries that require every node in the cluster to complete. This information should be surfaced in the same way we surface full table scans today i.e. explain/analyze and something similar to https://www.cockroachlabs.com/docs/stable/show-full-table-scans.html.
• Add a telemetry data-point to start capturing when a customer workload experiences this condition, so that CockroachDB R&D starts getting data on how prevalent and common such a pattern is in the wild (separate issue tracked here)

Jira issue: CRDB-16329

[lunevalex]

cc: @mwang1026 @maryliag @kevin-v-ngo

[kevin-v-ngo]

@lunevalex, can you help provide context on this issue? Is there an escalation you can send me?

Agree we should collect telemetry on this scenario but as for introducing user-facing observability, i'd love to understand what actions this would inform the user to take using this information.