release-23.1: sql/schemachanger: fix incorrect errors dropping primary key columns

[fqazi]

Backport 1/1 commits from #106634.

/cc @cockroachdb/release

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Previously, the declarative schema changer in DROP COLUMN CASCADE scenarios would either hang (23.1) or generate incorrect errors (master) when dropping a primary key column. This was because the primary index would be replaced during a DROP CASCADE scenario when cleaning up the cascade column. The check to see if the target column was a key could look for the original index, which will no longer be public. To address this bug, this patch checks if the target dropped column is a key column first.

Fixes: #105953

Release note (bug fix) : DROP COLUMN cascade involving a primary key column could end up hanging

Release justification: low risk and fixes a bug in the declarative schema changer

[blathers-crl]

Thanks for opening a backport.

Please check the backport criteria before merging:

• Patches should only be created for serious issues or test-only changes.
• Patches should not break backwards-compatibility.
• Patches should change as little code as possible.
• Patches should not change on-disk formats or node communication protocols.
• Patches should not add new functionality.
• Patches must not add, edit, or otherwise modify cluster versions; or add version gates.

If some of the basic criteria cannot be satisfied, ensure that the exceptional criteria are satisfied within.

• There is a high priority need for the functionality that cannot wait until the next release and is difficult to address in another way.
• The new functionality is additive-only and only runs for clusters which have specifically “opted in” to it (e.g. by a cluster setting).
• New code is protected by a conditional check that is trivial to verify and ensures that it only runs for opt-in clusters.
• The PM and TL on the team that owns the changed code have signed off that the change obeys the above rules.

Add a brief release justification to the body of your PR to justify this backport.

Some other things to consider:

• What did we do to ensure that a user that doesn’t know & care about this backport, has no idea that it happened?
• Will this work in a cluster of mixed patch versions? Did we test that?
• If a user upgrades a patch version, uses this feature, and then downgrades, what happens?

[cockroach-teamcity]

This change is