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Bootleggers of the Great Molecular Cloud: New smuggler station in Misam #9923

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Bootleggers of the Great Molecular Cloud: New smuggler station in Misam #9923

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08a6573
Copperline basic implementation
Galaucus Mar 4, 2024
26cf6da
Copperline implemented
Galaucus Mar 17, 2024
6442165
Minor prose edit
Galaucus Mar 18, 2024
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9 changes: 9 additions & 0 deletions data/map planets.txt
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Expand Up @@ -736,6 +736,15 @@ planet "Cool Forest"
spaceport `The spaceport here is a major city, with a continuous stream of cargo transports bringing goods manufactured on Cool Forest's sister planet, Diligent Hand. Here, some final assembly, testing, and repackaging is performed before those goods are shipped out to the rest of Saryd space and beyond.`
security 0.3

planet "Copperline Station"
attributes pirate station frontier "core pirate" smuggling
landscape land/distillery1
description `C2H5OH: Sweet, sweet ethyl alcohol, the nectar of the Gods spilled upon the heavens themselves. The Great Molecular Cloud which protrudes into this star system has long been a mythical promised land to spacers, whispered of since humanity first turned their spectroscopes towards the stars.`
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Pretty much every other planetary description mentions the name of the planet in the first sentence. This one doesn't mention it until the end of the second paragraph, and instead starts off with a convoluted formula. It doesn't help that ES doesn't have subscript, of course, but it takes a bit of thinking to figure out that that is in fact the chemical formula for ethyl alcohol. Then, the second sentence shifts topic after leaving the subject of the first one without a verb, which makes it read like a title. The whole paragraph takes a lot of reading between the lines, and it took two reads to fully get.

Overall, this paragraph is great storytelling, but I'd love to see some mention of the station's name (maybe why it's called Copperline?) and perhaps the contents of the first sentence can be redistributed among the later ones in this paragraph and the next one?

description `Myth no more, the harvesting of the Cloud to be processed into drinking alcohol is now a fairly lucrative industry - if one that the inhabitants of Copperline Station refuse to pay taxes on.`
description `The station itself is a fairly riotous assemblage of hangars, industrial distilleries, habitats, and ill-advises combinations thereof which would, no doubt, leave Republic health and safety officials aghast.`
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Suggested change
description `The station itself is a fairly riotous assemblage of hangars, industrial distilleries, habitats, and ill-advises combinations thereof which would, no doubt, leave Republic health and safety officials aghast.`
description `The station itself is a fairly riotous assemblage of hangars, industrial distilleries, habitats, and ill-advised combinations thereof which would, no doubt, leave Republic health and safety officials aghast.`

Could also use "undoubtedly" instead of "no doubt," but I think it's okay as-is.

spaceport `Bootleggers are notorious for their hotrodded starships, but most of the vessels parked here look decidedly mundane. Stock hull configuration, stock paint jobs, nothing that would call attention to them as anything but another interstellar traveler. It's only when you see a shuttle that's undergoing maintenance that the oversized engines and custom afterburner become visible.`
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I feel like this could be fleshed out a bit more. And maybe make the second sentence contain a verb other than "call attention to"?

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I presume there isn't any security, but what about defense fleets/tribute data?


planet Cornucopia
attributes farming forest frontier research south
landscape land/fields0
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4 changes: 4 additions & 0 deletions data/map systems.txt
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Expand Up @@ -23472,6 +23472,10 @@ system Misam
sprite planet/lava0-b
distance 159
period 24.2278
object "Copperline Station"
sprite planet/station1b-recolor
distance 1975
period 165
object "New Tortuga"
sprite planet/ocean3-b
distance 3010.56
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Binary file added images/planet/station1b-recolor.png
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The recolour is a bit unconventional, but I think it works since the only place station1b is actually used right now is outside of human space.

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