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Bootleggers of the Great Molecular Cloud: New smuggler station in Misam #9923
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Update map planets.txt
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Looks good for me.
Going to need new station sprites, it looks like. |
Yes. |
landscape land/distillery1 | ||
description `C2H5OH: Sweet, sweet ethyl alcohol, the nectar of the Gods spilled upon the heavens themselves. The Great Molecular Cloud which protrudes into this star system has long been a mythical promised land to spacers, whispered of since humanity first turned their spectroscopes towards the stars.` | ||
description `Myth no more, the harvesting of the Cloud to be processed into drinking alcohol is now a fairly lucrative industry - if one that the inhabitants of Copperline Station refuse to pay taxes on.` | ||
description `The station itself is a fairly riotous assemblage of hangars, industrial distilleries, habitats, and ill-advises combinations thereof which would, no doubt, leave Republic health and safety officials aghast.` |
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description `The station itself is a fairly riotous assemblage of hangars, industrial distilleries, habitats, and ill-advises combinations thereof which would, no doubt, leave Republic health and safety officials aghast.` | |
description `The station itself is a fairly riotous assemblage of hangars, industrial distilleries, habitats, and ill-advised combinations thereof which would, no doubt, leave Republic health and safety officials aghast.` |
Could also use "undoubtedly" instead of "no doubt," but I think it's okay as-is.
description `C2H5OH: Sweet, sweet ethyl alcohol, the nectar of the Gods spilled upon the heavens themselves. The Great Molecular Cloud which protrudes into this star system has long been a mythical promised land to spacers, whispered of since humanity first turned their spectroscopes towards the stars.` | ||
description `Myth no more, the harvesting of the Cloud to be processed into drinking alcohol is now a fairly lucrative industry - if one that the inhabitants of Copperline Station refuse to pay taxes on.` | ||
description `The station itself is a fairly riotous assemblage of hangars, industrial distilleries, habitats, and ill-advises combinations thereof which would, no doubt, leave Republic health and safety officials aghast.` | ||
spaceport `Bootleggers are notorious for their hotrodded starships, but most of the vessels parked here look decidedly mundane. Stock hull configuration, stock paint jobs, nothing that would call attention to them as anything but another interstellar traveler. It's only when you see a shuttle that's undergoing maintenance that the oversized engines and custom afterburner become visible.` |
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I feel like this could be fleshed out a bit more. And maybe make the second sentence contain a verb other than "call attention to"?
description `Myth no more, the harvesting of the Cloud to be processed into drinking alcohol is now a fairly lucrative industry - if one that the inhabitants of Copperline Station refuse to pay taxes on.` | ||
description `The station itself is a fairly riotous assemblage of hangars, industrial distilleries, habitats, and ill-advises combinations thereof which would, no doubt, leave Republic health and safety officials aghast.` | ||
spaceport `Bootleggers are notorious for their hotrodded starships, but most of the vessels parked here look decidedly mundane. Stock hull configuration, stock paint jobs, nothing that would call attention to them as anything but another interstellar traveler. It's only when you see a shuttle that's undergoing maintenance that the oversized engines and custom afterburner become visible.` | ||
government Independent |
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I presume there isn't any security, but what about defense fleets/tribute data?
planet "Copperline Station" | ||
attributes pirate station frontier "core pirate" smuggling | ||
landscape land/distillery1 | ||
description `C2H5OH: Sweet, sweet ethyl alcohol, the nectar of the Gods spilled upon the heavens themselves. The Great Molecular Cloud which protrudes into this star system has long been a mythical promised land to spacers, whispered of since humanity first turned their spectroscopes towards the stars.` |
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Pretty much every other planetary description mentions the name of the planet in the first sentence. This one doesn't mention it until the end of the second paragraph, and instead starts off with a convoluted formula. It doesn't help that ES doesn't have subscript, of course, but it takes a bit of thinking to figure out that that is in fact the chemical formula for ethyl alcohol. Then, the second sentence shifts topic after leaving the subject of the first one without a verb, which makes it read like a title. The whole paragraph takes a lot of reading between the lines, and it took two reads to fully get.
Overall, this paragraph is great storytelling, but I'd love to see some mention of the station's name (maybe why it's called Copperline?) and perhaps the contents of the first sentence can be redistributed among the later ones in this paragraph and the next one?
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The recolour is a bit unconventional, but I think it works since the only place station1b is actually used right now is outside of human space.
@Galaucus Do you know when you can get around to resolving the above comments? |
Lake's checklist for when to undraft this sucker:
Content (New station, jobs)
Summary
New planet in support of an intended, more comprehensive smuggling gameplay system. Planet will, when fully fleshed out, offer a special mission chain where you help these rascally rumrunners expand their operations, beat up their landlord, and outrun the law.
This will grant a license to purchase the powerful (but self-damaging) Rumjet Afterburner, as well as special smuggling outfits to be implemented alongside the proposed smuggling overhaul (#6314) .
Screenshots
Artwork Checklist
(If any artwork was added or changed by this PR, the following must be provided.)
@2x
versions of these art assets: {{insert PR link}}