Henk's review feedback for WGLC #20
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dthaler
reviewed
Jun 24, 2024
draft-ietf-rats-endorsements.md
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| manner. The state of an Attester also encompasses the combination of static and | ||
| dynamic constitution (e.g., provisioned and deployed software, firmware, and | ||
| components of execution environments (its "shape" or "composition"), typically in a hierarchical | ||
| manner, i.e., a tree graph. The state of an Attester also encompasses the combination of static and |
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I have never seen "tree graph". You could say "tree" or "connected and acyclic graph". My preference is for the former.
draft-ietf-rats-endorsements.md
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| states, and an appraisal policy that controls how the two are compared. | ||
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| Each Attester in general has at least one Attesting Environment and one Target | ||
| Environment (e.g., hardware, firmware, Operating System, etc.). Typically, each | ||
| Attester has multiple Target Environments, each with their own set of claims (sometimes | ||
| called a "claimset") representing their actual state. Additionally, the number of | ||
| Target Environments is not limited. | ||
| called a "claim sets") representing their actual-state. Additionally, the number of |
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I prefer the non-hyphenised version "actual state". Besides, the term should be made consistent across the whole document.
draft-ietf-rats-endorsements.md
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| called a "claim sets") representing their actual-state. Additionally, the number of | ||
| Target Environments and Attesting Environments that are components of an Attester are not limited. |
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I suggest removing the sentence "[A]dditionally, [...] not limited" as it doesn't add any value to the paragraph.
draft-ietf-rats-endorsements.md
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| "Reference state" is a group of claimsets about the desired or undesired state of | ||
| the Attester. Typically, each claim has a name (or other ID) and | ||
| "Reference state" is a group of claim sets about the desired or undesired state of | ||
| an Attester. Typically, each claim has a name (or key, label, or other ID) and |
henkbirkholz
commented
Jul 3, 2024
henkbirkholz
commented
Jul 3, 2024
added more words instead of removing words, but I think is this okay
henkbirkholz
commented
Jul 3, 2024
removed redundant verbosity
Signed-off-by: Thomas Fossati <thomas.fossati@linaro.org>
thomas-fossati
approved these changes
Jul 3, 2024
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a little bit late, but there are always little fires everywhere.