server: fix deadlock when call killNonFlashbackConn

[Defined2014]

What problem does this PR solve?

Issue Number: close #38862

Problem Summary:

1. update client-go to fix minSafeTS not change for about 10 minutes tikv/tikv#13675
2. fix deadlock for killNonFlashbackConn, it require the read lock at

   tidb/server/server.go

   Line 946 in 5ee578c

   s.rwlock.RLock()

   , then try to get read lock in s.Kill() func, if another write lock require in between, like close/create conn, it will deadlock forever.

What is changed and how it works?

Check List

Tests

• Unit test
• Integration test
• Manual test (add detailed scripts or steps below)

use tpcc workload, then execute flashback, no deadlock anymore.

• No code

Side effects

• Performance regression: Consumes more CPU
• Performance regression: Consumes more Memory
• Breaking backward compatibility

Documentation

• Affects user behaviors
• Contains syntax changes
• Contains variable changes
• Contains experimental features
• Changes MySQL compatibility

Release note

Please refer to Release Notes Language Style Guide to write a quality release note.

None

[ti-chi-bot]

[REVIEW NOTIFICATION]

This pull request has been approved by:

• dveeden
• hawkingrei

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[zimulala]

Rest LGTM

[Defined2014]

/merge

[ti-chi-bot]

@Defined2014: /merge in this pull request requires 2 approval(s).

In response to this:

/merge

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[Defined2014]

/lgtm

[hawkingrei]

/merge

[ti-chi-bot]

This pull request has been accepted and is ready to merge.

Commit hash: 9a84893

[sre-bot]

TiDB MergeCI notify

✅ Well Done! New fixed [1] after this pr merged.

CI Name	Result	Duration	Compare with Parent commit
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/common-test	🔴 failed 1, success 10, total 11	13 min	Existing failure
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/tics-test	✅ all 1 tests passed	5 min 23 sec	Fixed
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/integration-ddl-test	🟢 all 6 tests passed	28 min	Existing passed
idc-jenkins-ci/integration-cdc-test	🟢 all 39 tests passed	21 min	Existing passed
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/integration-common-test	🟢 all 17 tests passed	14 min	Existing passed
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/sqllogic-test-2	🟢 all 28 tests passed	6 min 42 sec	Existing passed
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/sqllogic-test-1	🟢 all 26 tests passed	4 min 54 sec	Existing passed
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/mybatis-test	🟢 all 1 tests passed	3 min 11 sec	Existing passed
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/integration-compatibility-test	🟢 all 1 tests passed	3 min 3 sec	Existing passed
idc-jenkins-ci-tidb/plugin-test	🟢 build success, plugin test success	4min	Existing passed