added my adventure to the story #10141
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@casey-collab Please review this |
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Hey! Me! Review this @casey-collab |
casey-collab
reviewed
May 2, 2019
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| The mangled body twitched, trying to move. Trying to stand. Positronic units cut power to severed actuators, rerouting dwindling power to functioning systems. The charred body moved slowly, broken and twisted, it moved by will power alone. Something snapped. Its shielded ocular units flickered as systems died. A final burst of power surged through damaged pathways. “ I am not done…” The unit’s power cells, drained completely kicked to reserve power. Enough to shutdown primary systems. Raw connections stopped sparking. The air around the body smelled of ozone. A figure in black rose from a crouching position, check the vitals readout on the fallen target on its HUD, shutdown its pulse cannon and rerouted power to its transtemporal units. The black head turned surveying the surrounding area sifting through sensory data that it was receiving and then blinked out of existence. Slowly, woodland animals crept from their shelters. | |||
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This line is longer than 120 characters. Could you break it up into multiple lines? That way it will be easier to read the raw files or view diffs on the command line. No need to add blank lines in between, just press enter somewhere in the middle of the line.
casey-collab
reviewed
May 2, 2019
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| The mangled body twitched, trying to move. Trying to stand. Positronic units cut power to severed actuators, rerouting dwindling power to functioning systems. The charred body moved slowly, broken and twisted, it moved by will power alone. Something snapped. Its shielded ocular units flickered as systems died. A final burst of power surged through damaged pathways. “ I am not done…” The unit’s power cells, drained completely kicked to reserve power. Enough to shutdown primary systems. Raw connections stopped sparking. The air around the body smelled of ozone. A figure in black rose from a crouching position, check the vitals readout on the fallen target on its HUD, shutdown its pulse cannon and rerouted power to its transtemporal units. The black head turned surveying the surrounding area sifting through sensory data that it was receiving and then blinked out of existence. Slowly, woodland animals crept from their shelters. | ||
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| By the time mankind attained interstellar flight, humans had almost been wiped from existence. After the Great Nuclear War, a new government was established. The rebuilding of the mother planet had begun. Four hundred years after the war that almost destroyed humankind, the first faster than light ships were been built in orbit around the earth. Humans selected for colonizing the galaxy were selected. In four centuries man had progressed farther than since the beginning of his legacy on the planet. Advances in science and art were made. Man had finally learned to live together in harmony. As in any other society of high technology, advances were made at staggering rates. |
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This line is also too long.
casey-collab
reviewed
May 2, 2019
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| By the time mankind attained interstellar flight, humans had almost been wiped from existence. After the Great Nuclear War, a new government was established. The rebuilding of the mother planet had begun. Four hundred years after the war that almost destroyed humankind, the first faster than light ships were been built in orbit around the earth. Humans selected for colonizing the galaxy were selected. In four centuries man had progressed farther than since the beginning of his legacy on the planet. Advances in science and art were made. Man had finally learned to live together in harmony. As in any other society of high technology, advances were made at staggering rates. | ||
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| NOTE: This is an original piece written by the author. You are not permitted to use it in any fashion other then to read it and then point and laugh :) |
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This line is also too long.
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Unfortunately, this pull request conflicts with another change. Could you merge the master branch of the original repository into your branch, resolve the merge conflicts, and update the pull request? |
casey-collab
reviewed
May 2, 2019
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It looks like this page is not reachable from the rest of the story. That is, if a reader starts in language.md and keeps clicking links, they will never find this page. You can fix this by finding a good place in the existing story to add an option with a link that leads to this page.
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Besides my other comments, this looks good! Once you respond to those, this should be good to merge. |
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Just a little excerpt from a story I have been working on.