TroW Proofread Pass Second Draft

Second Draft of ef932b9.
wesnoth · Oct 3, 2021 · a4cd9d4 · a4cd9d4
1 parent ef932b9
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Showing 6 changed files with 6 additions and 6 deletions.
diff --git a/data/campaigns/The_Rise_Of_Wesnoth/scenarios/06_Temple_in_the_Deep.cfg b/data/campaigns/The_Rise_Of_Wesnoth/scenarios/06_Temple_in_the_Deep.cfg
@@ -229,7 +229,7 @@
 
                         [message]
                             speaker=narrator
-                            message= _ "As Haldric opens the chest he sees it, the Ruby of Fire. It is the size of an apple, and burns with an internal fire, which is refracted through its faces. He can feel the power flowing from it..."
+                            message= _ "As Haldric opens the chest, he sees it — the Ruby of Fire. It is the size of an apple and burns with an internal fire, which is refracted through its faces. He can feel the power flowing from it..."
                             image=wesnoth-icon.png
                         [/message]
 

diff --git a/data/campaigns/The_Rise_Of_Wesnoth/scenarios/08_Clearwater_Port.cfg b/data/campaigns/The_Rise_Of_Wesnoth/scenarios/08_Clearwater_Port.cfg
@@ -918,7 +918,7 @@
         name=victory
         [message]
             speaker=Prince Haldric
-            message= _ "We’ve escaped from the orcs before getting trapped by the ice! Now, on to Southbay."
+            message= _ "We’ve escaped from the orcs before the winter ice could trap us! Now, on to Southbay."
         [/message]
 
         [message]

diff --git a/data/campaigns/The_Rise_Of_Wesnoth/scenarios/09_Fallen_Lich_Point.cfg b/data/campaigns/The_Rise_Of_Wesnoth/scenarios/09_Fallen_Lich_Point.cfg
@@ -344,7 +344,7 @@
         [/filter]
         [message]
             speaker=narrator
-            message= _ "This monolith was erected by me, ― (<i>chipped away</i>), first Mage of the good people of the Green Isle. By its power, the Lich-Lord is bound in stone. To end the spell, a noble of the line of Kings should utter the following..."
+            message= _ "This monolith was erected by me, ― (<i>chipped away</i>), First Mage of the good people of the Green Isle. By its power, the Lich-Lord is bound in stone. To end the spell, a noble of the line of kings should utter the following..."
             image=wesnoth-icon.png
         [/message]
 

diff --git a/data/campaigns/The_Rise_Of_Wesnoth/scenarios/11_Southbay_in_Winter.cfg b/data/campaigns/The_Rise_Of_Wesnoth/scenarios/11_Southbay_in_Winter.cfg
@@ -190,7 +190,7 @@
         [/message]
         [message]
             speaker=King Addroran IX
-            message= _ "No. Flee, and flee east. It is my duty to hold this city as long as I can for the sake of all who can be evacuated. This means that it shall fall on Haldric and you to lead the evacuation."
+            message= _ "No. Flee, and flee east. It is my duty to hold this city as long as I can for the sake of all who can be evacuated. That means it shall fall on Haldric and you to lead the evacuation."
         [/message]
         [message]
             speaker=Prince Haldric

diff --git a/data/campaigns/The_Rise_Of_Wesnoth/scenarios/16_The_Kalian.cfg b/data/campaigns/The_Rise_Of_Wesnoth/scenarios/16_The_Kalian.cfg
@@ -433,7 +433,7 @@
                 [/message]
                 [message]
                     speaker=Lord Aryad
-                    message= _ "Well then, human. Each of us lords has a specific quest for you. If you complete them all you will be granted all of the plains in our domain and the hills south of the Great River, if not you will be forced to depart. So, which quest do you wish to undertake first?"
+                    message= _ "Well then, human. Each of us lords has a specific quest for you. If you complete them all you will be granted all of the plains in our domain and the hills south of the Great River; if not you will be forced to depart. So, which quest do you wish to undertake first?"
                 [/message]
                 {QUESTS}
 

diff --git a/data/campaigns/The_Rise_Of_Wesnoth/units/Wesfolk_Leader.cfg b/data/campaigns/The_Rise_Of_Wesnoth/units/Wesfolk_Leader.cfg
@@ -19,7 +19,7 @@
     {AMLA_DEFAULT}
     cost=60
     usage=mixed fighter
-    description= _ "Born in the Wesfolk aristocracy, she and her people were excluded from society by their lords, who betrayed their loyalty when a war against Haldric’s people was being lost. This outcast still conserves her nobleness in her veins, and on the battlefield she has earned valuable experience, which continues to increase with time, as does her natural leadership."
+    description= _ "Born in the Wesfolk aristocracy, she and her people were excluded from society by their lords, who betrayed their loyalty when they started losing a war against Haldric's people. This outcast still conserves her nobleness in her veins, and on the battlefield she has earned valuable experience, which continues to increase with time, as does her natural leadership."
     die_sound={SOUND_LIST:HUMAN_FEMALE_DIE}
     [defend]
         hits=miss