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                                A
                        Parody _on_ Iolanthe

                               BY

         _D. DALZIEL_ EDITOR of the Chicago NEWS. LETTER.

             The whole Illustrated _by_ H. W. McVickar.

                           [Illustration]

                      _Published_ by D. DALZIEL

                   The Halch Lithographic Co. New York.

                             MDCCCLXXXIII

[Illustration]




A PARODY on IOLANTHE

(_Respectfully dedicated to the Conductors of the Chicago & Alton
Railroad._)

(BY D. DALZIEL, EDITOR OF THE CHICAGO NEWS-LETTER.)


 SCENE.--_A fairy glade on the Chicago & Alton Railway,
     at Holy Cross, Illinois. The country bears evidence
     of the utmost prosperity. It is early in June, yet
     the fields for miles in every direction are waving
     with already ripened grain that is going to take
     first prize at the next National Exhibition. The
     ensuing scene occurs in the brief interval allowed for
     purposes of safety between the trains on this road.
     Chorus of fairies, discovered dancing over the wheat
     stocks._

(_Enter_ ROCKY MOUNTAIN FAIRIES, _led by_ LEILA, CEILA, _and_ FLETO.)

CHORUS.

    Tripping always, tripping ever,
    By each glen, each rock, each river,
    We must twirl and we must twine
    Round about the Alton line.

SOLO.

LEILA--

    If you ask us how we ride,
    See our cars and step inside:
    Cars of most convenient size,
    Cars enchanting tourists' eyes,
    Pullman Palace sleeping cars,
    Free from dust, from noise, from jars;
    Cars with soft reclining chairs,
    Where we nestle free from cares;
    Cars no cynic can place fault on,
    Chicago, Kansas City, Alton.
    Spite of distance, time, or weather,
    See three cities link'd together.

CEILA--That is extremely true and very pretty. Moreover, it is a very
noble employment, this acting in behalf of the foremost railway of the
world. Still, we are not altogether happy. Since our queen banished
Iolanthe, our life has not been a transcendent one.

LEILA--Ah, Iolanthe was a whole team, and, like the Alton Road, she was
the only one in the crowd who carried a proper train. But according to
the laws of Fairydom, she committed an unpardonable sin. The fairy who
marries a mortal must die.

CEILA--But Iolanthe is not dead. (_Enter_ FAIRY QUEEN.)

QUEEN--No, because your queen, who loved her as much as a member of the
State legislature loves a railway pass, commuted her sentence to travel
for life on other lines, and sooner than do it she confined herself in
a pond.

LEILA--And she is now working out her sentence in Iowa.

QUEEN--Yes. I gave her the choice of States. I am sure I never intended
that she should go and live under a culvert beneath the bank of an Iowa
railway.

LEILA--It must be damp there, and her chest was always delicate.

QUEEN--Yes. An Iowa railway is hardly the place to send a delicate
chest. Even an iron-bound trunk has no show on any other line than the
Chicago & Alton. I do not understand why she went there.

ALL--How terrible; but, O Queen, forgive her.

QUEEN--I've half a mind to.

LEILA--Make it half and half, and wholly do it.

QUEEN--Well, it shall be as you wish. Arise, Iolanthe.

(IOLANTHE _arises_.)

IOLANTHE--Must I again reflect my grievous fault on----

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

QUEEN--Oh, no; we bring you back to bliss and Alton. And now tell me:
with all the world to choose from, why on earth did you go to live at
the bottom of that Iowa culvert?

IOLANTHE--To be near my son Strephon.

QUEEN--Your son! I didn't know you had a son. I hardly think you'd
oughter, Iolanthe.

IOLANTHE--He was born shortly after I left my husband at your royal
command.

LEILA--What is he?

IOLANTHE--He is an Arcadian brakesman. He is one of those extremely
pure young persons who have passed a competitive examination of
intelligence before they can become _anything_ on the Alton Road. Ah,
here he is.

(_Enter_ STREPHON.)

STREPHON--

    Good morrow, good mother;
      I'm to be married to-morrow.

IOLANTHE--Then the Counselor has at last given his consent to your
marriage with his beautiful ward Phyllis.

STREPHON--Alas! no. He is obdurate. He wants nothing less than a
General Passenger Agent.

QUEEN--But how to get round this difficulty with the Counselor. Should
you like to be a General Passenger Agent?

STREPHON--That would hardly do. You see I am half human, half fairy. My
body is of the Alton Fairy kind, but my legs are of another line, and
would be likely to take me on the wrong track.

QUEEN--Well, your fairyhood doesn't seem to have interfered with your
digestion.

STREPHON--It is the curse of my existence. What's the use of being half
a fairy? My body can go through the air-brake pipe, but if my legs
ever get between the couplers, I'm a goner. There is one advantage: by
making myself invisible down to the waist, I have collected damages
from one railway company several times, because they couldn't find the
rest of me after an accident. My legs, I suppose, will die some day,
and then what will be the use of my bust? I can't satisfy Phyllis with
half a husband.

QUEEN--Don't let your legs distract you. They shall be our peculiar
care. The Alton does nothing by halves. So farewell, attractive
stranger. [_Exit all._

(_Enter the entire corps of officers of all the railways west of
    Chicago, except the C. & A. They are accompanied by a band, in
    which the instruments are exclusively and appropriately made of
    brass. The blowers in this band are the employes of the railway
    officers._)

OFFICERS--

    Loudly let the trumpet bray. Tan-tan-ta-ra, tan-tan-ta-ra!
    Proudly bang the sounding brasses, tzing, boom!
    As upon its lordly way this unique procession passes.
        Tan-tan-ta-ra, tan-tan-ta-ra! etc.,
        Tzing, boom, tzing, boom! etc.

    Bow, bow, ye lower trav'ling masses.
    Bow, bow, ye folks who ask for passes;
    Blow the trumpets, bang the brasses.
        Tan-tan-ta-ra! Tzing, boom! etc., etc.

(_At conclusion, enter_ COUNSELOR.)

COUNSELOR--

    The law is the true embodiment
    Of everything that's excellent;
    It has no kind of fault or flaw,
    And I, for cash, expound the law;
    A constitutional lawyer I,
    For a great railway society;
    A very agreeable post for me,
    While my railway planks down its fee;
    A solid occupation for
    A money-making counselor.

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

CHORUS OF OFFICERS.

COUNSELOR--

    And though the compliment implied
    Inflates me with legitimate pride,
    It nevertheless can't be denied,
    I feel its inconvenient side;
    For she has lots of Alton stock,
    As good as gold, and firm as a rock.
    But there'd be the deuce to pay, O Lord,
    If I patch'd up a match with my wealthy ward,
    Which rather gets up my dander, for
    I'm such a susceptible counselor.
    So if a director would marry my ward,
    He must come to me for my accord;
    In the Alton office I'll sit all day,
    To hear what agreeable men may say.
    But Phyllis declares she's not for he,
    She's not for thou, and she's not for thee,
    She wont have you, and she wont have ye,
    Because her mind is made up for
    A Chicago & Alton director.

(_Enter_ LORD BEESEEKEW.)

LORD B.--And now let us proceed to the business of the day. Few of us
have done any business for many days.

COUNSELOR--True. Let us proceed more rapidly than your trains. Phyllis,
my ward, has so powerfully affected you that you have let all your
railways go to eternal smash, and you have asked me to give her to
whichever one of you I may select. It would be idle for me to deny
that I, too, have been wonderfully attracted to this young woman. My
affection for her is rapidly undermining my constitution, just as it
has undermined the constitutions of all your railways. But we shall
hear what she has to say herself, for here she comes.

(_Enter_ PHYLLIS.)

RECITATIVE.

    My well lov'd lord and guardian dear,
    You summoned me, and I am here.

CHORUS OF GENERAL PASSENGER AGENTS.

    Oh, rapture! how beautiful,
    How gentle, how dutiful!

(_Gen. Pass. Agents make a dumb appeal to_ PHYLLIS.)


SONG.

PHYLLIS--

    I'm very much pain'd to refuse;
      My guardian you can't lay the fault on.
    The only young man I would choose
      Must be from the Chicago & Alton.
    That road so eclipses the rest,
      Its men are so handsome and hearty,
    That I know where to turn for the best,
     When I want a particular party.

(_Enter_ STREPHON, _the brakeman_; PHYLLIS _rushes to him._)

    It must not, cannot be,
      Your suits my heart has riven;
    Yon jolly brakeman see,
      To him my heart is given.

ALL THE G. P. A.'S--Jerusalem!

COUNSELOR--

    And who has dared to brave our high displeasure,
      And thus defy our definite command?

STREPHON--

    'Tis I, young Strephon; mine, this rosy treasure;
      Against all lines I claim my darling's hand.

(_Exit all the G. P. A.'s in disgust, and with as much dignity as if
    they belonged to the Alton Road._ STREPHON _and_ COUNSELOR
    _remain._)

COUNSELOR--Now, sir, how dare you fall in love with my ward?

STREPHON--Love knows no guardianship. We follow our inclinations. As
I whirl along the Alton Road, all nature speaks of her love, and says
"Take her." I read it on the face of the Sphinx Rock. William's Canon
thunders it forth, the Snowy Range melts in sympathy with our love, the
Twin Lakes are one in wishing us joy, the Bowlder Falls leap with joy
at our prospective union, and from Alton to Santa Fe every bird and
bush and tree choruses our bliss; and can you say nay?

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

COUNSELOR--

       Duty before pleasure. I always keep my duty before my eyes.
    When I went to the Alton, a very young man,
        Said I to myself, said I,
    I'll work on a new and original plan,
        Said I to myself, said I.
    I'll never assume that a road is O. K.,
    That it's perfect, in fact, like the C. and the A.,
    Till I've tried it my own and particular way,
        Said I to myself, said I.

    I'll never throw dust in a passenger's eyes,
        Said I to myself, said I,
    Recommending a road with buncombe and lies,
        Said I to myself, said I,
    Or pretend that some other roads of which we read
    Can equal the Alton for comfort and speed,
    Or supply all the luxuries travelers need,
        Said I to myself, said I.

    Ere I boast of the road, I will travel it through,
        Said I to myself, said I,
    And see that its officers do what they can do,
        Said I to myself, said I.
    So I went on the road from the first to the last,
    I travel'd with pleasure so safe and so fast,
    That I said, such a road can ne'er be surpass'd,
        Said I to myself, said I.

    On all other roads by which men may go,
        Said I to myself, said I,
    They're none of them safe, and they're all of them slow,
        Said I to myself, said I.

    The Chicago and Alton must still be A 1,
    For business, for pleasure, for health, or for fun,
    Or it never could have such a character won,
        Said I to myself, said I.

(_This being rather a difficult song to sing, the_ COUNSELOR, _in reply
    to the deafening encore which he receives, will hand to each person
    in the audience a copy of the Langtry Map, a book of the Patience
    Parody, a copy of the Chicago News-Letter, and a folder of the
    Alton Road. Exit_ COUNSELOR, _with a skip._)

STREPHON--It's too bad to be taken from Phyllis just when
she was my own.

(_Enter_ IOLANTHE.)

IOLANTHE--What, my son in tears upon his wedding-day!

STREPHON--The Counselor, who is Phyllis's guardian, separates us
forever.

IOLANTHE--Oh, if he only knew----No matter. The Queen of our road and
its fairies shall protect you. See, here they come. (_Enter_ FAIRIES.)

(STREPHON _embraces_ IOLANTHE, _sobbing. Enter_ PHYLLIS. _She sees_
    STREPHON _embrace his mother, and starts violently._)

SONG.

STREPHON--The little girl I love has caught me talking to another.

ALL--Oh, fie! Strephon is a rogue.

STREPHON--But then, upon my honor, that other is my mother.

CHORUS.

    Taradiddle, taradiddle, fol lol de lay.

STREPHON--

    She wont believe my statement, and declares we must be parted,
    Although I'm just as true as an Alton train when started;
    And if she gets another hub, a brakeman, broken-hearted,
    I shall be, taradiddle dee, taradiddle dee.

QUEEN--

    You cruel and heartless counselor to part them from each other;
    You've done him an injustice, for this lady _is_ his mother.

COUNSELOR--

    That yarn requires obesity its thinness well to cover;
    I didn't see her face, but he acted like her lover.
    And how could she, at seventeen, be an Alton brakeman's mother?

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

CHORUS.

    To say she is his mother is a fib as big as many.
      Oh fie! Strephon is a rogue;
    He'll next declare the Alton's not the best of any.
      Taradiddle, taradiddle dee.

COUNSELOR--

    I wouldn't say of either what would be thought injurious;
    But to find a mother younger than her son is very curious,
    Just as 't would be upon our road to drop an aught that's spurious.
                  Fol de ridle, fol de ridle, fol lol lay.

(_Tremulo music._)

QUEEN--When next your convention does assemble, you may tremble. Our
wrath when railroad heads offend us is tremendous. They must who
underrate our calling "cut rates appalling." Take down our sentence as
we speak it, and he shall wreak it. Henceforth, Strephon, cast away
your brakeman suit and brakeman pay; another racket you shall play. Of
the beauteous Alton Line, favorite Western road of mine, you a G. P. A.
shall be. Gentlemen, what do you think of he?

ALL--It should be him--

QUEEN--

              I haven't time
    To think of my grammar; it's very good rhyme.

And now take down my word and pleasure. Henceforth, your equal he shall
be. Into your councils he shall come, in your debates he shall rule.
Henceforth, it is the Alton Road you must imitate.

ALL--Have mercy!

QUEEN--From this time forth, you will have to run your trains on the
same standard of excellence which marks the Alton.

(_Hands every one of them a time-table of the C. & A._)

ALL--Spare us!

QUEEN--You will be forced to employ none but civil officials.

ALL--Have mercy!

QUEEN--The comfort of your passengers must be your primary
consideration.

(_Very solemnly._) _You will also be forced to run your trains
    according to your advertised time-table._

ALL--(_Shriek_)--Oh, spare us! spare us!

QUEEN--And now depart. When next your council meets, Strephon will be
one of you.

(_Slow music. G. P. A.'s bow to_ STREPHON. _Business, etc. Curtain._)




ACT II.

 SCENE--_Interior of the Chicago & Alton Railway at
     Chicago. Luxurious surroundings on all sides. Ticket
     office opens down to the inlaid mosaic floor. Handsome
     divans for passengers engaged in the purchase of
     tickets. At the gate, waiting for passengers as they
     go through in swarms, is_ WILLIS, _a handsome man,
     like all the other servants of this road, and also,
     like them, he is clothed in an expensive and becoming
     uniform._

WILLIS--(_Sings._)

    I often think it's comical,
      How nature always does incline
    To place the best of all its boys
      That's born into this world of mine
    In the road that only such employs--
      The great Chicago & Alton Line.

(_Enter_ FAIRIES _and_ G. P. A.'s.)

LEILA--(_Who has been attracted by the officers_)--Charming persons,
are they not?

CEILA--They do very well, considering whom they work for. In Alton
uniforms they would look very well.

LORD BEESEEKEW--Well, we have done our best to imitate Alton, but it
seems to be a failure. Why not stop this disgusting protege of yours?

CEILA--(_Crying_)--We can't stop him. The road has made too much
headway. It is harder to kill than a Presidential boom in Indiana.
(_Aside._) How beautiful they all are!

(_Enter_ QUEEN, _who has overheard last remark._)

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

QUEEN--O you shameful flirts, always running after those railway men.
Don't you know it's death to marry a mortal?

CEILA--If it were, you'd have to execute all of us; but who wouldn't
fall in love with a railroad man?

LEILA--Especially a Chicago & Alton man, and we are not all as tough as
you are.

QUEEN--Am I tough? Look at that daisy! (_Pointing to_ WILLIS.) Who are
you, sir?

WILLIS--Ticket-taker Willis of the Chicago & Alton Railroad.

QUEEN--You're a fine fellow, sir.

WILLIS--Yes, mum, I belong to the Alton.

QUEEN--(_Starts_)--The Alton! Ah! I, too, am not insensible to the
charms of manly beauty. Look at that man! He is a fair specimen of the
Alton employes--a perfect picture.

WILLIS--Yes, mum, I am generally admired, although I do not compare
favorably with my fellow-employes. The standard of beauty is very high
on this road. (_Modestly retires._)

QUEEN--The road has taste--(_To the_ FAIRIES.) Now here is a man
belonging to the first road in the Union, whose physical beauty
eclipses Apollo's. If I yielded to a natural impulse, I should at once
be mashed by that man. But I mortify this inclination; I wrestle with
it,--I subdue it, ha! ha! This is how I suppress my inclinations.

SONG.

        O foolish fay,
    Think you, because his jacket gay
    My bosom thaws, I'd disobey
    Our fairy laws? Because I fly
    The road above, you think that I
    This man could love.

(_Aside._)

    Type of Chicago & Alton,
    This heart of mine
    Is truly thine.
    'Tis it I lay the fault on.

(_Exit_ FAIRIES, _sorrowfully following_ FAIRY QUEEN.)

(_Enter_ PHYLLIS.)

PHYLLIS--I can't think why I am not in better spirits. I am engaged
to one General Freight Agent and one General Passenger Agent, and
could have the whole railway association if I only said the word. As
for Strephon, I hate him. No girl would care for a young man who was
considerably older than his mother--though nowadays there are a good
many such floating about.

(_Enter_ LORD BEESEEKEW.)

LORD B.--Phyllis, my own!

PHYLLIS--How dare you! But perhaps you are the Freight Agent--or the
General Passenger Agent.

LORD B.--I am--the latter.

PHYLLIS--How did you secure the distinction?

LORD B.--To be frank, because everybody was rushing for positions on
the Alton, and they left the post uncovered. I have held the place a
long time.

PHYLLIS--Because nobody else would have it?

LORD B.--Not so much that as because now the Alton has run our business
down so, there is no money to pay salaries with, and I am willing to
wait for mine. The stockholders appreciate my kindness.

(_Enter_ LORD SEE EYEAR.)

LORD S.--Dearest Phyllis! (_Embraces her._)

PHYLLIS--The Freight Agent! Well, have you settled? Have you settled
which of you it is to be?

LORD S.--It isn't quite settled. We tossed for it, but we did it
in a saloon where the dice always threw sixes. We got hold of the
proprietor's private set. Suppose we leave the choice to you?

PHYLLIS--How can it possibly concern me? You are both railway
officials. You both get everything but your salaries, and I don't see
where I am to choose. If one of you will throw up your share in your
so-called railway, and admit the Alton to be, what it is, the first
line in the world, I might perhaps take time to consider.

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

LORD B.--We are too jealous to admit that, although we know it. The
only resort now is for one of us to give way to the other. Perhaps, on
the whole, she would be happier with me.

LORD S.--The chances are in your favor. The one difficulty which
remains is, that if you rob me of the girl I love I must kill you. I
shall give you a pass over my railroad.

LORD B.--(_Shrieks with fright_)--Not that! Not that! (_Bursts into
tears._)

LORD S.--I think you are right,--the sacrifice is too great. The sacred
ties of friendship will not permit the wanton cruelties suggested,
between men who love each other as we do. (_They embrace._)

(_Enter_ COUNSELOR, _very sorrowful._)

COUNSELOR--(_Recitative._)

    Love unrequited robs me of my rest,
      Although the Alton Line is still victorious;
    But in a song to tell my woes is best,
      If you, kind friends, will join me in the chorius.

SONG.

    When on some snide road, with a terrible load,
             and an engine not up to an Alton one,
    You lie ill at ease, in a berth filled with fleas,
             all ready to make an assault on one,
    With your mind in a pother on this, that, and t' other,
      Because, in your doubt and perplexity,
    You travel'd this way, while happy as play
      Goes the Chicago & Alton just next t' ye.

    Then the counterpane tickles--you feel like mixed pickles,
      Your pillow as hard as a bullet,
    And your sheet is so small it wont cover at all,
      No matter 'tis which way you pull it;
    Then you rave, and you swear, and tear out your hair,
      With none but yourself to lay fault on,
    And swear by the Heaven, if once you're forgiven,
      To abjure all lines but the Alton.

LORD B.--I am much distresst to find you so sad.

COUNSELOR--I am; I acknowledge it. It is my double capacity which
does it. I am her guardian and her suitor. In my latter capacity I am
overawed by my duty in my other capacity. It unnerves me.

LORD S.--It is hard. Just think of having two capacities. Let us be
truly thankful that we have no capacity at all. But take courage;
nothing that I ever heard of daunted a Chicago & Alton Railroad
official.

COUNSELOR--That is true, and I will be resigned. [_Exeunt._

_Enter_ PHYLLIS.

PHYLLIS--Strephon!

STREPHON--Phyllis! But I forgot. I suppose I should, madam----let me
see,--what name have you decided upon?

PHYLLIS--I haven't quite made up my mind. You see, _I_ haven't any
mother to advise me.

STREPHON--No! I have.

PHYLLIS--Yes, a very _young_ mother.

STREPHON--Not very--a couple of centuries or so.

PHYLLIS--She wears well.

STREPHON--Of course she does. She was born and reared on the C. & A.
line. Besides, she's a fairy.

PHYLLIS--I beg your pardon--a what?

STREPHON--A fairy. I've no longer a reason to conceal the truth.

PHYLLIS--That would account for a good many things. Fairies nowadays
are rather indiscreet. I suppose you are a fairy, too.

STREPHON--I'm half a fairy and half a mortal.

PHYLLIS--Not very substantial. But why didn't you tell me?

STREPHON--I thought I might get myself disliked. There's no use loving
half a man.

PHYLLIS--Better that than to love a whole man, as they go nowadays.
Forgive me.

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

STREPHON--Think of the difficulties. My grandmother looks quite as
young as my mother. So do all my aunts.

PHYLLIS--Then, if I catch you kissing the chambermaid, I shall know
she's only a relative in disguise.

STREPHON--In that case, I will forgive you.

PHYLLIS--Then we will be married at once. I will attend to the fairies
afterward. But how about your mother?

IOLANTHE--(_Entering._)--The old lady is here, and blesses you, my
children,--or words to that effect.

STREPHON--But how about her guardian?

IOLANTHE--There is but one thing to do. I have been married to him for
some years now. He is Strephon's father.

STREPHON--At last! I am a wise child.

IOLANTHE--And being his wife, I will assume my domestic duties. Have
you a club handy?

COUNSELOR--(_Enters jubilant_)--It's settled! Victory! victory! I
put the case plainly to myself, although I must confess that when I
addressed so important a personage as the legal adviser of the Chicago
& Alton Railroad, I did so with many feelings of doubt in my mind.
However, I took courage and pleaded my cause well. I said to myself,
with the respect with which I always address myself, you are the legal
adviser of the greatest railroad in the country, and, as such, you
should not hesitate to exercise your _droits de seigneur_ and take the
girl from all competitors. I was bound to admit the force of my own
argument, and so won my case. I shall marry the girl without delay.
There is nothing to stand in the way.

IOLANTHE--(_Comes down._)--Excepting a mere trifle.

COUNSELOR--And that is--but who are you? (_Starts._) Ah! Thou livest,
Iolanthe?

IOLANTHE--Never say die is the motto of the Alton Line. (_She falls
into his arms._)

QUEEN--(_Iolanthe kneels to her._)--

    Once more thy vows are broken,
    The Fates thy doom has spoken. (_Enter_ EVERYBODY.)

LEILA--Hold! If Iolanthe must die, so must we all, for we are equally
guilty.

QUEEN--Equally guilty! (_All kneel._)

LORD S.--Pardon them. They could not help it. The ancient traditions
surrounding railway officials were too much for them, and they married
us.

QUEEN--The traditions of our tribe must be imperative. They who marry
mortals must die. There is no going back on the statutes.

COUNSELOR--Hold! I haven't been helping the public to obey the law all
these years for nothing. Let me give your statute a whirl. (_Looks it
over._) Easy enough. Make it read that every fairy who marries outside
the Alton Road shall die.

QUEEN--Good idea. (_Does it._) And now where's Willis?

WILLIS--Tickets, please.

QUEEN--Yes, for the matrimonial line. How would you like to be a fairy
ticket-taker?

WILLIS--On the Chicago & Alton?

QUEEN--That is the statute.

WILLIS--It is one of the oldest traditions of this road that none of
its employes can possibly be ill-bred, particularly to a lady. I am
yours.

QUEEN--And now the only way to save our tribe from annihilation is for
all you gentlemen to obey the law. Remember that any fairy who marries
other than a Chicago & Alton man must die. (_All shudder._)

STREPHON--And I, being in the Alton Road, will immediately employ you
all and absorb all your lines. It was bound to come to that sooner or
later.

COUNSELOR--The old wife is better than no wife, so here we all go to
fairyland.

(_The Alton uniform instantly covers them all, and their haggard,
    care-worn expressions are replaced by the happy, seraphic looks of
    men who habitually work for the C. & A. R. R._)

[Illustration]

[Illustration: Finis]




[Illustration: _Jas. S. Kirk & Comp'y
Soap Masters & Perfumiers
North Side--Chicago_

=Jas. S. Kirk & Compy's Toilet Soaps=

Highly Perfumed with natural odors--In boxes artistically
designed--Packets elaborately enveloped.

=Jas. S. Kirk & Compy's Concentrated Essences for the handkerchief=

Flower odors--Rare degree of strength--And lasting.

=Jas. S. Kirk & Compy's Zenithia Cologne=

A delightful bouquet pronounced by connoisseurs to be the perfection of
colognes.]




"The Home Journal of The West."

THE SATURDAY EVENING HERALD,

CHICAGO,

89 CLARK STREET, GRAND OPERA HOUSE BLOCK.


The HERALD is now in its ninth year, and has achieved a reputation as a
Literary, Critical and Social authority.

It publishes more critical matter, society reports and pure literature
than any other weekly in the West.

The special departments of this most successful family and society
journal are as follows:

     1. =Literature, Book Reviews, Essays, Poems, Stories,
     Sketches.=

     2. =Social Reports and Gossip, Fashion Articles=, and
     Discussions of Home Topics.

     3. =Musical and Dramatic News, Criticism and
     Correspondence.=

     4. =Correspondence from the principal Eastern and
     European cities.=

     5. =Watering Place Reports and Notes of Travel.=

     6. =Amateur Rowing, Yachting and Athletic= Reports in
     their season.

     7. =Editorial Discussions of Noteworthy Events and
     Important Topics, Observations and Scientific Papers.=

Those who may not have seen the HERALD recently are invited to obtain a
specimen copy and find how much more newsy and entertaining it is than
ever before.

[hand] All the leading Merchants and Railroads in Chicago indorse the
SATURDAY EVENING HERALD, by constantly making use of its advertising
columns. It is read by more people who have the means and the
inclination to travel than any other weekly paper published in the West.

[hand] It has received more complimentary notices from the press of
Chicago than any other weekly paper ever issued in the city, and,
throughout the city and vicinity, is regarded as _=a Social and
Critical Authority=_.

Subscription, only $2.00 per annum.

  LYMAN B. GLOVER.      Address    THE SATURDAY EVENING HERALD CO.,
  JOHN M. DANDY.                                              CHICAGO.
  E. R. PAIGE.




[Illustration: CAMPING, BOATING, TENTS]

FOR ANY AND ALL USES.

DEALERS IN

FISH NETS, SEINES AND TWINES

AND ALL FISHING MATERIALS.

GEO. B. CARPENTER & CO.

(Successors to GILBERT HUBBARD & CO.)

202 TO 208 SOUTH WATER STREET, CHICAGO.




CHAS. D. COLSON,

IMPORTER, MANUFACTURER AND DEALER IN

FIRE BRICKS

Furnace Tiles, Cupola Linings,

LOCOMOTIVE FIRE BOX TILES,

Smoke Jacks and Chimney Pipes for Railroad Round Houses,

  _CULVERT PIPE, Etc._,
    _CONNELLSVILLE COKE_,
      _ALBANY MOULDING SAND_,
        _PLUMBAGO CRUCIBLES_,
          _FOUNDRY FACINGS & SUPPLIES_

Enameled Bricks in All Shapes and Colors, Hydraulic Cement.

PROMPT SHIPMENT. PRICES AND QUALITY GUARANTEED.

SEND FOR CIRCULAR AND CATALOGUES.

184 and 186 Washington St.,

CHICAGO, ILL.




  D. L. WELLS, Pres't.                        E. MARINER, Vice Pres't.
    H. L. NORTON, Sec'y and Treas.              F. E. WALKER, Engineer.
                          C.F. SCOVILLE, Manager.

BRIDGE AND CAR WORKS

OF THE

WELLS & FRENCH CO.

OFFICE:

Hawley Building, cor. Madison & Dearborn Sts.,

CHICAGO, ILL.




FREDRICK SCHNEIDER,

MANUFACTURER AND DEALER IN

Stained, Enameled, Embossed, Cut, Ground, Colored and Beveled

GLASS

For Door Panels, Transoms, Prescription Cases, Druggists' Signs,
Railroad Cars, Steamboats, Offices,

PUBLIC BUILDINGS, CHURCHES, ETC.

ESTIMATES FURNISHED FOR CHURCH WORK OF ALL DESCRIPTIONS

80 and 82 MARKET STREET,

Between Washington and Madison,

CHICAGO, ILLINOIS.




CLIFTON HOUSE

CHICAGO.

RATES, $2.50 AND $3.00 PER DAY.

WOODCOCK & LORING,

PROPRIETORS.




THE J. M. W. JONES

Stationery and Printing Co.

_COR. DEARBORN & MONROE STS., CHICAGO_,

MANUFACTURERS OF

The Stromberg Improved Coupon Ticket,

AND CONSECUTIVELY NUMBERED RAILROAD TICKETS

Blank Books and Railroad Blanks of Every Description Made to Order.

LITHOGRAPHED DRAFTS, CHECKS, BONDS, ETC.

DEALERS IN

LIGHT RAILROAD SUPPLIES.

  Coupon and Local Ticket Cases.      Dating Stamps, Rubber Stamps,
      Conductors' Punches, Car Seal Punches,
                    =L=, =B C=, =2 C= and =1/2= Punches.

BRASS BAGGAGE CHECKS, EYELETTING MACHINES, SEAL PRESSES, WAY-BILL
COPYING PRESSES, HAT BADGES, FOLDER BOXES, TARIFF PORTFOLIOS,

AND PASSENGER AND TICKET SUPPLIES IN GENERAL.

The J. M. W. Jones Stationery AND Printing Co.

167, 169 AND 171 DEARBORN STREET,

CHICAGO.




  W. H. SALISBURY.      G. F. CLINE.

SALISBURY & CLINE,

DEALERS IN

Rubber and Leather Belting, Hose

AND ALL KINDS OF

RUBBER GOODS

MANUFACTURERS' AGENTS FOR

  GOODYEAR I. R. GLOVE CO.    BOSTON BELTING CO.    BOSTON WOVEN HOSE CO.

JAS. DAVIS & CO.

109 MADISON STREET, CHICAGO.




CARPETS, FURNITURE, CURTAIN GOODS,

FINE AND MEDIUM GRADES AT

POPULAR PRICES,

And Satisfaction Guaranteed to every Purchaser.

_A Large Choice Stock to Select from._

CHICAGO CARPET CO.

Wabash Ave. and Monroe St.




W. S. & J. B. WILKINSON,

Manufacturers of

Fine Morocco, Satin and Plush Cases

AND TRAYS FOR THE JEWELRY TRADE,

6 CALHOUN PLACE,

_REAR OF 116 DEARBORN STREET_, CHICAGO, ILL.




  WM. E. STRONG, President.      GEO. C. HEMPSTEAD, Treasurer.

THE PESHTIGO COMPANY,

MANUFACTURERS OF

Lumber, Lath and Shingles.

OFFICE AND YARD:

North Water St., North Pier, East of Rush Street Bridge,

CHICAGO.




NATIONAL TUBE WORKS CO.

MANUFACTURERS OF

Lap-welded Pipe, Charcoal Iron

Boiler Tubes, Semi-Steel Locomotive Tubes, Kalamein Boiler Tubes,

MACK'S INJECTORS for LOCOMOTIVES

LIFTING AND NON-LIFTING,

Special Light Wrought Iron Pipe

Fitted with Converse Lock Joint for Water, Gas and Compressed Air,

CASING, DRIVE PIPE, ETC., ETC.

All Sizes, up to 16 inch, inclusive.

NATIONAL TUBE WORKS CO.

Cor. of CLINTON and FULTON STS., CHICAGO.




THE BEST!

THE Great Eastern Mutual Life Association

OF CHICAGO, ILL.

Office: Rooms 25 and 26 Nixon Building, 175 La Salle Street.

  OFFICERS:
            {J. H. BAKER,       President.
            {CHAS. A. BRUNER,   Secretary.
            {C. R. DOLLARHIDE,  Gen'l Agent.
            {G. H. UNVERZAGT,   Gen'l Man. and Treas.


PLAN OF THE ASSOCIATION.

The General Plan of the Association is of the same order of the many
existing Co-operative Benevolent Societies in which an insurer pays an
"Admission Premium" to the agent of the Association. Subsequently, in
case of death, an assessment is made upon said insurer as well as upon
the others, and when it is collected it is paid over to the beneficiary
of the deceased, the money actually not being in the hands of the
Association, as a rule, 30 days.


HOW TO SECURE MEMBERSHIP, AND COSTS.

Any person, male or female, between the ages of 15 and 70, can secure
$6,000 Insurance, or less, in this Association.

COST.--Each $1,000 insurance costs the insurer $10.00 as a membership
fee. Thereafter, $2.00 semi-annually expense fee and assessment for
claims as per table.

  -------------++---------------------------------------------------+
   TABLE OF    ||  COMPARATIVE ASSESSMENT TABLE.                    |
  ASSESSMENT   ||Comparative Assessment Table for a party           |
     RATE.     ||            aged 68 years.                         |
  -------+-----++---------+-----------------------------------------+
    AGES | PAY ||         |      Would pay upon a loss of           |
   15-40 |  10 ||A member |      (See columns below.)               |
   40-60 |  15 ||having a +------+------+------+------+------+------+
   60-65 |  20 ||Policy of|$1,000|$2,000|$3,000|$4,000|$5,000|$6,000|
   65-70 |  25 ||---------+------+------+------+------+------+------+
  -------+-----+| $1,000  |$ .25 | $ .50|$ .75 |$1.00 |$1.25 |$1.50 |
               || $2,000  |  .50 |  1.00| 1.50 | 2.00 | 2.50 | 3.00 |
   Cents/$1,000|| $3,000  |  .75 |  1.50| 2.25 | 3.00 | 3.75 | 4.50 |
   death loss  || $4,000  | 1.00 |  2.00| 3.00 | 4.00 | 5.00 | 6.00 |
   for every   || $5,000  | 1.25 |  2.50| 3.75 | 5.00 | 6.25 | 7.50 |
   $1,000      || $6,000  | 1.50 |  3.00| 4.50 | 6.00 | 7.50 | 9.00 |
   indemnity   |+---------+------+------+------+------+------+------+
   a person has||Other associations would, in every instance, charge|
               ||the highest rates, as given in the lower line      |
  -------------++---------------------------------------------------+
    REMARKS.                                                        |
  The rate being 25 cts. at this age, of course for a lower rate    |
  a corresponding difference will occur.                            |
  ------------------------------------------------------------------+

_THE ORIGINAL AND ONLY LOW ASSESSMENT ASSOCIATION IN THE UNITED STATES,
WITH ITS PLAN COPYRIGHTED. ITS PATRONS PAY AS THEY GO, AND GET WHAT
THEY PAY FOR._


ITS PRINCIPLES ARE:

A Mutual Performance of Honest Obligations, and Equality to All.

_RELIABLE PATRONAGE AND SOLICITORS WANTED. ADDRESS THE SECRETARY._




W. C. WHITTEMORE,

Steel Rails, Iron Rails

(OLD AND NEW),

  CAR AXLES, DRAW BARS, LINKS AND PINS,
      RAILROAD SPIKES, SPLICE BARS, TRACK BOLTS,
        PRATT WASHERS, CAR WHEELS, NUTS AND WASHERS,
                BAR, TANK AND SHEET IRON.

Office, 68 Washington St., Chicago.




[Illustration]

  First Premium
  AWARDED TO
  Empire Car
  Roofing Co.,
  FOR BEST
  APPLICATION OF
  Metal Car Roofs.

  Office:
  264 S. Water St.,
  CHICAGO.

  _R. B. CROUCH_,
  Gen'l Manager.

[Illustration]




J. W. MIDDLETON,

BLANK BOOKS,

Printing, Stationery

55 State Street, Chicago.

  REFERS TO {All Railroads leading out of Chicago.
            {Banks throughout the West.




THE CONGDON BRAKE SHOE CO.

[Illustration]

Room 19, Commercial Bank Building,

COR. DEARBORN AND MONROE STS.

GEO. M. SARGENT, Sec'y.

WORKS, Cor. 59th and Wallace Sts. WM. D. ROWLEY, Manager.


_Record of Test on Chair Car 102, Chicago & Alton R. R. Co._

     "The wear of your four Congdon Shoes on a mileage of 7,824
     miles was 15 pounds. Four common shoes show wear of 51 pounds."

     The above shows a saving of over 70 per cent. in favor of
     Congdon Shoes, or, number of miles run to each pound of Congdon
     Shoe worn off, 521.6, and number of miles run to each pound of
     common worn off, 153.4.




SPRAGUE, SMITH & CO.,

POLISHED PLATE GLASS,

FRENCH AND AMERICAN WINDOW GLASS,

French and German Mirror Plates; Colored, Cut and Enameled Glass

OF ALL KINDS.

Manufacturers of Pier and Mantel Mirrors,

205 RANDOLPH ST., CHICAGO.




RATES: $2.00 and $2.50 PER DAY.

THE Commercial Hotel,

N. W. CORNER LAKE AND DEARBORN STS.,

Chicago.

  C. W. DABB & CO.,             CHAS. W. DABB,
              Proprietors.               Manager.
                          (Formerly of the Palmer House.)




  F. M. ATKINSON, President.      C. H. FERRY, Treasurer.

CHICAGO TYRE and SPRING WORKS,

SOLE MANUFACTURERS IN THE WEST OF

Cast Steel Car Springs

AND LOCOMOTIVE AND CAR WHEEL TYRES.

We manufacture Springs for Passenger, Freight, Baggage and Express
Cars of every description, and Locomotive and Tender Springs to
specification. We use only the

BEST OBTAINABLE CAST STEEL,

of uniform quality, thoroughly =TEST= every Spring before shipment,
and fully =GUARANTEE= the same for the purpose intended. Capacity,
twenty-five tons daily.

We roll tyres, both crucible and Siemen's Martin, from blooms
especially made for us in England. They are rolled true to
specification, and we give the most satisfactory assurances as to wear
and mileage. Present capacity, twenty Locomotive Tyres daily. We fill
all orders promptly.

  _WORKS, MELROSE, ILL.      CHICAGO OFFICE, 94 WASHINGTON ST._




CHICAGO AND NEW YORK

The two cities above named are the great commercial centres of the
United States, the former containing in the vicinity of 650,000
inhabitants, and the latter about 1,500,000. The number of people
actually in Chicago at any one time would doubtless range far above
these figures, as its floating or transient population is enormous,
running up into figures that can hardly be credited. The traffic
passing between these two cities daily is very large, when one
considers that they are within a fraction of 1,000 miles apart. Boston
also has a large traffic with Chicago, and, to give an idea of the
accommodations necessary to provide for the passenger business alone
between the three cities, we may state that the

  Michigan Central Railroad,

which is the principal thoroughfare between the cities named, runs
five express trains daily--three on Sundays--made up of fine new day
coaches, smoking cars, drawing-room cars, palatial sleeping cars.

The Michigan Central Railroad has always held a foremost place among
the lines between Chicago and the Atlantic seaboard, and the latest
addition to their accommodations, in the shape of four new Dining Cars,
will greatly strengthen its position.

These new cars are incomparable for beauty of design and selectness of
adornments, all the elegancies of art having been exhausted to produce
the most desirable effect. That the end has been gained goes without
saying, and they stand to-day as far in advance of other Dining Cars as
the first Dining Cars were in advance of the lunch counters at wayside
stations.

The _cuisine_ is quite on a par with the finish of the cars, and all
that may minister to the nourishment of the body or tickle the palate
of the most discriminating epicures will be found therein.

Other great features of the Michigan Central Railroad are that its
through trains for New York and Boston run out of Chicago along the
Michigan Lake front, within a stone's throw of the city's costliest
mansions, through South Park and the magic city of Pullman, affording
an extensive survey of this marvel of a marvelous age, and later
passing over the new Cantilever Bridge in full view of Niagara Falls.
It is for this latter reason known to all travelers as "The Niagara
Falls Route."




GEO. KELLER,

21 ILLINOIS ST., CHICAGO, ILL.

MANUFACTURER OF

RAILROAD

Bulletin Boards

AND

FRAMES OF EVERY DESCRIPTION

FOR ADVERTISING PURPOSES.

SAMPLES WILL BE FURNISHED ON APPLICATION.




E. W. BLATCHFORD & CO.

CHICAGO, ILL.

MANUFACTURERS AND DEALERS IN

  Lead Pipe.        Solder.
  Sheet Lead.       Antimony.
  Bar Lead.         Spelter.
  Block Tin Pipe.   Block Tin.
            LINSEED OIL.




A TRIP TO NIAGARA FALLS.


"Come, Adele; come. Nellie; hurry up. Deacon Fitney will be here
directly and the train starts directly."

The voice was that of Mr. Trevellyan, a thoroughly well-known and
highly respected stock broker of the City of Chicago. Mr. Trevellyan
was a hardworking man, and his various affairs did not give him much
opportunity of absenting himself from his business. But to-day had been
laid out as a holiday for the babies, and Papa Trevellyan had made up
his mind to take part in it.

After a good deal of family discussion [these things generally involve
more or less of that sort of thing] it was finally decided to make a
trip to Niagara Falls and back. So a party was made up which was to
consist of Mr. and Mrs. Trevellyan, the two children and a good-hearted
Deacon Fitney, who was well acquainted with the way to "do" the Falls
properly.

The day was, as I have just said, a bright one, even for the month of
June, and both Adele and Nellie, in anticipation of a pleasant time,
were not long in putting on their things and repairing to the parlor.

It was well they hurried. There was papa, valise in hand, ready to
start; mamma, too; and nothing seemed to be wanting but the presence
of Deacon Fitney, who had gone off to secure the railway tickets, and
who promised to return at once with a carriage and accompany the whole
party to the train. The Deacon was not long in coming back. He was a
good man in his way, was the Deacon. He had only one fault--he was
unreasonably fond of Buttons! He adorned his apparel with more buttons
than even the law requires, and he wore a nice gold-headed button on
his neatly-tied satin scarf. Nobody could ever find out what prompted
this peculiarity, but then nobody seemed to care very much. However, as
I said before, the Deacon came back very quickly and helped get things
in the carriage.

"By the way, Deacon," said Mr. Trevellyan, "what time do we start and
which way do we go? You know I have left everything of that kind to
you."

"Four-fifteen," said the Deacon, in a cheerful sort of way, "and by the
Michigan Central Railroad. It is the only way to go. But never mind
about the advantages to be gained by going over this remarkable route.
I will tell you all about it when we get on the train."

And so they bundled into the carriage, and within a few minutes the
entire party was seated in one of the magnificent palace cars which are
attached to the Michigan Central Limited Express.

"All aboard!" shouted the conductor. "We're off," smiled the Deacon.
The big clock in the depot struck the quarter after four, and the
magnificent train, composed of five sleepers, three coaches, a palace
dining car and a couple of baggage cars, slowly pulled out of the
station.

Adele and Nellie glued their noses to the window, and their delight
as they whizzed through the beautiful suburbs of South Chicago seemed
unbounded. With Lake Michigan, tranquil and glittering with the rays
of a summer sun, on one side, and a succession of lovely suburban
residences on the other, the sight was a most lovely one. A few minutes
later the train was flying through green fields and beautiful woods.

"Here, children," suddenly cried the Deacon from the other side of the
car, "come quick and see the magic city of Pullman." In a minute Adele
was on one of the Deacon's knees and Nellie on the other, and the train
passed rapidly by the most wonderful evidence of modern enterprise.

"Three years ago," said the Deacon, in answer to an enquiring look of
admiration in the children's eyes, "the ground on which stands this
most beautiful city, which is without doubt the model city of the
world, was nothing but a swamp. See what it is now. Some day, when we
get back home, I will bring you here and let you learn more closely
what the creator of the beautiful place which bears the name of Pullman
has done for his country."

A minute later the train flew past Kensington, and then fairly started
on its iron way for its first stopping place, Michigan City, better
known as the City of Sand. Then came Niles, with it wonderful bridge
and its fairy valley. Then Kalamazoo, the biggest village in the
world and the flower bed of creation. Then Marshall, Battle Creek
and, Jackson, the latter place the centre of railway industry of the
beautiful State of Michigan. Then Ann Arbor, where is situated the
University of the State of Michigan, and then, last but not least,
Detroit.

By this time, of course, the babies had been tucked in bed. The Deacon
had taken them into the dining car and feasted them with all the
inexhaustible luxuries for which these cars on the Michigan Central R.
R. are so famous.

Then, the colored porter having made up their beds, they were soon fast
asleep and dreaming of the treat in store for the morrow.

The Deacon, however, was determined at least that his grown-up friends
should lose none of the beauties of the trip, and so he insisted that
Mr. and Mrs. Trevellyan should remain up until they had crossed the
famous Detroit River. The night was a beautiful one, and they were
amply rewarded by witnessing one of the most thoroughly picturesque
pieces of scenery in the world. The entire train was placed on one of
the immense ferry steamers, and the landing shortly afterwards made
at Windsor, a picturesque and quaint little town on the Canadian side
of the river. At this point commences the Canada Southern Division of
the Michigan Central Railroad, famous alike for the magnificence of
its equipment and smoothness of track. Here our friends, so to speak,
turned in, and it was only a few minutes before every one on board was
fast asleep.

The next thing was the morning sun and Niagara Falls. The run had been
made from Chicago in the remarkable time of fifteen hours.

"Oh, how good of you, Deacon Fitney," said little Adele a short while
later, as, standing on the platform at Falls View Station, she gazed
with rapture at the Falls in all their splendor. "How good of you to
bring us to such a nice place, and by such a delightful road."

And little Adele had reason to so express herself, for, standing where
she was, at Falls View Station, she was able to command the most
awe-inspiring and lovely view of the Falls to be obtained anywhere.

"I am glad you like it," said the Deacon, with a smile; "but you must
not credit me with too much goodness, for I could hardly have brought
you by any other way. The Michigan Central road is the only direct road
running to the Falls, and you could hardly expect that I could take you
there by any line which is not entirely the best."

Mr. and Mrs. Trevellyan heartily joined Adele in her expressions of
thanks to the Deacon, and more than endorsed every word he had said in
praise of the wonderful Michigan Central Limited Express.

The conductor then called "all aboard," and the train again started
on its way, and very shortly crossed the Niagara River over the
magnificent steel Cantilever bridge which the Michigan Central people
have just erected at this point.

"This is the great Cantilever bridge you have heard so much about,"
said the Deacon to little May. "It is the greatest scientific
engineering effort of the age, and it is well worth visiting Niagara,
if only to see it. With Niagara Falls and the Cantilever bridge the
Michigan Central people are able to show their passengers the greatest
work of nature and of man to be found in the country."

From the bridge the train glided along to Niagara Falls station, on the
American side. Here our little party alighted, and, after driving about
the village, they soon found themselves in the comfortable parlors of
the Clifton House, enjoying one of Mr. George Colburn's justly famous
repasts.

Then they spent the day at the Falls--a day of merry sunshine and
happiness. The Falls never looked grander, and nature never smiled with
more sweetness. The time passed only too quickly, and when the children
stepped on the cars once more to return to Chicago, it was with a
twinge of regret which was only offset by the knowledge that they had
another delightful trip in store for them on the Michigan Central road.

Now Adele has the following time table hung up among her pictures on
the wall in her bed room. She says it serves to remind her of one of
the happiest days of her life. Above it, in a baby's handwriting, she
has scrawled:

  "THE ONLY WAY TO GO EAST FROM CHICAGO IS BY THE
               MICHIGAN CENTRAL R. R."


        TRAIN No. 10.--FAST NEW YORK EXPRESS,--Leaves
     Chicago _every day_ at 4:30 P. M., and consists of one
     First-Class Smoking Car, one First-Class Day Coach,
     one DINING CAR and THREE PALACE SLEEPING CARS, running
     on the following time:

   Leaves  Chicago............4:15 PM Sun. Mon. Tues. Wed. Thur. Fri. Sat.
    "      Jackson............9:57 PM  "    "     "    "    "     "    "
   Arrives Detroit...........12:05 AM Mon. Tues. Wed. Thur. Fri. Sat. Sun.
    " St. Thomas..............3:25  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " Toronto, via CVRy.......9:40  "  "    "    "    "     "    "  [A]
    " Niagara Falls...........6:55  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " Buffalo.................7:50  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " Rochester, via NYC.....11:10  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " Syracuse, via NYC.......1:30 PM  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " Utica, via NYC..........3:12  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " Albany, via NYC.........5:50  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " Troy, via NYC...........6:55  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " New York, via NYC......10:00  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " Hornellsville,via Erie 12:00  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " Elmira, via Erie........1:40  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " Binghamton, via Erie....3:19  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " New York, via Erie.....10:25  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   "
    " Philadelphia, via LV...10:30  "  "    "    "    "     "    "   [A]
    " Boston, via B&A.........6:25 AM Tues. Wed. Thur. Fri. Sat. Sun.[B]

  [A] Does not arrive on Sunday.      [B] Does not arrive on Monday.
  ======================================================================

This train, leaving Chicago one hour later than heretofore, makes a
much surer connection with Western lines.

The Smoking Car, Day Coach and one Sleeping Car run through to Buffalo
via M. C.; one Sleeping Car runs through to Toronto via M. C. and
Credit Valley Railways; one Sleeping Car runs through to New York via
M. C. and N. Y. C. The Dining Car serves dinner out of Chicago at 5
o'clock; train arrives in Buffalo in good season for breakfast.

This train has attached at Detroit a Through Sleeping Car from St.
Louis to New York, via W., St. L. & P., M. C. and N. Y. C., that makes
quicker through time than any other line; and also a Sleeping Car from
Detroit to Syracuse that is placed in Detroit depot about 9 P. M.
Passengers can enter their berths any time after that hour.

Connects with Grand Trunk trains in Detroit.

Connection with Pullman Car for New York and Philadelphia, via Erie,
leaving Buffalo at 9:15 A. M., and also with Buffalo, New York and
Philadelphia, leaving at 8:20 A. M.

Connects at Albany with through sleeper for Boston, via B. & A.,
leaving at 8:40 P. M.

No second-class passengers are carried on this train.

NOTE.--NO EXTRA CHARGE IS MADE ON MICHIGAN CENTRAL FAST EXPRESS.

Adele's advice is very excellent. She says the Michigan Central is the
best road in the United States, and she knows what she is talking about.

[Illustration]




Ansonia Clock Co.

MANUFACTURERS

[Illustration]

  Office Regulators,   Nickel Novelties,
  RAILROAD             MANTEL
  TIME KEEPERS,             CLOCKS,
  STREET AND            BRONZE
  TOWN CLOCKS          Ornaments

OFFICES:

64 WASHINGTON STREET,

CHICAGO




The United States Rolling Stock Company

Offers for Lease to

Railroads, Freight Lines, Mining Companies and others

  Locomotive Engines,
      Refrigerator Cars,
          Box, Stock,
              Gondola, Dump
                  and Flat Cars,

And is prepared to build for Lease and on Contract for cash, or under
the CAR TRUST SYSTEM, such Rolling Stock as may be required.

WORKS:

  HEGEWISCH, ILL.      Capacity, Twenty Cars per Day.
  URBAN, OHIO.         Capacity, Ten Cars per Day.


  General Offices,       35 Broadway, New York.
  Chicago Offices,       Calumet Building, 189 La Salle Street.


  A. HEGEWISCH, President,          C. BENN, Treasurer,
  THOS. F. B. PARKER, Secretary,    W. H. CHADDOCK, General Agent,
  J. H. HOCART, Ass't Treasurer,    J. C. FORTINER, Sup't of Acc'ts,
          NEW YORK.                          CHICAGO.
                JOHN L. STAGG, Sup't of Shops.




MARSHALL FIELD & Co.

     WHOLESALE,                      RETAIL,
  Madison and Market Sts.     State and Washington Sts.
                        CHICAGO.

  _Dry Goods, Cloaks, Costumes, Shawls,_
  _Furs, Woolens, Notions,_
  _Men's, Women's and Children's_
  _Furnishing Goods, Carpetings,_
  _Curtain Materials,_
  _Tapestries, Furniture Coverings,_
  _And goods for_
  _"Home Art Decorations."_

  _Largest and Most Complete Lines._

  _We are Sole Agents for United States for the_
  _Celebrated "ALEXANDRE" Kid Gloves_
  THE BEST KID GLOVE MADE.
  _And we make a Specialty of producing private designs in_
  _Carpets, Rugs & Upholstering Goods,_
      _To correspond with architectural features of rooms, and of_
  _Furnishing Churches, Theatres,_
  _Hotels and Homes._

CHICAGO VISITORS CORDIALLY INVITED TO CALL.




THE MERIDEN SILVER PLATE CO.

NO. 64 WASHINGTON STREET, CHICAGO, ILL.

MANUFACTURERS OF THE

FINEST QUALITY QUADRUPLE PLATED WARE

SPECIAL AND RICH DESIGNS IN

Hotel and Dining Car SERVICE.

  ILLUSTRATED CATALOGUES AND PRICE LISTS
  Mailed on application.

[Illustration: =No. 771. PEPPER.= Hammered and Applied. $3.00.]

[Illustration: =No. 789. Pepper.= Made in Silver, Old Silver and Gold
Finish. Silver,-----$2.00 Old Silver,----2.50 Gilt,----2.50]

Factories: MERIDEN, CONN.

New York Office: 30 EAST 14th STREET.

[Illustration: =No. 1676. CAKE BASKET.= $21.00. Decorations in Natural
Colors. Example of High Art Work in Electroplate. ]




[Illustration: Race Brothers

Oyster House

114 Madison Street

Chicago.]

ESTABLISHED 1870.

The largest, most complete, and only Strictly First-Class Gentlemen's
and Ladies' Oyster House west of New York City.

_STEAKS and CHOPS added to Bill of Fare after January first._




  _A. BELFORD (of Belford, Clarke & Co.), President._
  _C. SLEMIN, Jr. (of Belford, Clarke & Co.), Sec. and Treas._
  _M. A. DONOHUE (of Donohue & Henneberry)._

  R. NEVERS, Jr., Superintendent.


The Central Lithographing and Engraving Co.

315 to 321 Wabash Avenue,

CHICAGO.


Lithographing,

WOOD ENGRAVING,

Printing, Binding and Electrotyping.


ENTIRE NEW OFFICE.

EVERY BRANCH OF THE BUSINESS UNDER ONE ROOF.

Anything, from a Visiting Card to the Finest Chromo Work.

Railroad and Show Printing

A SPECIALTY.

SEND FOR ESTIMATES.




Fine Art Work

A Specialty.

[Illustration]

The Lakeside press.

R. R. Donnelley & Sons,

(LATE DONNELLEY GASBETTE & LOYD.)

[Illustration]

Printers.

  140-146 Monroe St.      CHICAGO

TELEPHONE No. 610.

TAKE ELEVATOR.

[Illustration]

They would invite the special attention of Railroad Corporations,
Manufacturers, Merchants, and Publishers to their Fine Illustrated
Work, pronounced unequalled by the press of Europe and America.




THE BEST EQUIPPED RAILROAD IN THE WORLD.


Without exaggerating, and keeping close within the narrow limits of
fact, it may be asserted without fear of truthful contradiction, that
the

CHICAGO & NORTH-WESTERN RAILWAY

Is not only the best and most perfectly equipped railroad in the world,
but it is also the most important as to the territory it traverses, the
numerous business centres and pleasure resorts that it reaches, and
the facilities it offers for pleasant, speedy, safe and comfortable
transit for all classes of passengers. It caters alike to the needs,
tastes and abilities of the millionaire merchant prince; to the farmer,
with his plain and simple wants; and to the economical and necessitous;
and gives to each the full value of all he pays for. Its luxuriantly
finished and furnished palace sleeping cars and its more than luxurious
drawing-room coaches are marvels of beauty and comfort. Its coaches
are new and of the most perfect models that have been adopted by any
company, and they are always kept sweet, clean and pure. Its dining
cars are superb, and the meals and service provided in them are equal
to that given by any first-class hotel in the country.


WHERE IS IT?

Starting from Chicago and having various main lines running west,
northwest and north, it covers about all that is desirable in Northern
Illinois, Iowa, Wisconsin, the Upper Michigan Peninsula, Minnesota and
Central and Southeastern Dakota and Northeastern Nebraska.

It is eminently _the_ railroad of the Northwest, and from its
commanding location it controls the traffic of all of the territory it
traverses.


WHAT IS IT?

Over 5,000 miles of the best built and best maintained railroad there
is in the country. It is equal in every respect to any road in the
world, and is believed to be better than any of its competitors. Its
lines are built of heavy steel rail; its bridges are of steel, iron and
stone, and all its appointments are as good as money can buy.


COLORADO & CALIFORNIA.

This Company's line between Chicago and Council Bluffs (Omaha) _is
shorter_ than any other between these points, and was the pioneer in
forming connection with the Trans-Continental Union and Central Pacific
Railroads. Nearly all experienced overland travelers seek this line,
because it is known to be the best, shortest, most comfortable, and
in every way the most desirable. To seek other more circuitous and
inferior routes is accepted as an evidence of inexperience or want of
information.

If you are destined to or from Colorado, Nebraska, Utah, Wyoming,
Montana, Idaho, Nevada, California, Oregon, Washington Territory,
China, Japan, the Sandwich Islands, New Zealand or Australia, you
should, in making the trip between Chicago and Council Bluffs (Omaha),
in either direction, see that your tickets read over this great road.


ST. PAUL, MINNEAPOLIS & WINNIPEG.

This road, "St. Paul Line," is the short and desirable route between
Chicago and Madison, St. Paul and Minneapolis; Helena, Montana;
Portland, Oregon, and points on the Northwest Pacific coast, and the
best to travel over if you are destined to or from Chicago and any
point north or northwest of St. Paul. Winona and Mankato, Minn.;
Frankfort, Huron, Pierre, Aberdeen, Columbia and Watertown, Dakota;
Milwaukee, Fond du Lac, Oshkosh, Watertown and Sheboygan, Wis.;
Freeport, Elgin, Dixon and Fulton, Ill.; Clinton, Cedar Rapids, Des
Moines, Webster City, Algona, Tama and Council Bluffs, Iowa, are a few
of its hundreds of prominent local stations. It reaches most of the
pleasant summer resorts of Wisconsin and Minnesota, and is the road
to take for the health and scenic resorts of the Rocky Mountains, the
National Yellowstone Park, and nearly all of the notable Western and
Northwest resorts that are accessible by rail.

It connects in Union Depots with the Union Pacific Railway at Council
Bluffs, and at St. Paul with the Northern Pacific St. Paul, Minneapolis
& Manitoba, and with all roads diverging from that point.

You can procure tickets over this route from nearly every coupon ticket
agent in the country. When buying your tickets read them carefully and
be sure that at least one coupon reads over the CHICAGO & NORTH-WESTERN
RY. Ask your nearest coupon ticket agent for one of its large maps;
they are FREE, and will show you all of this Company's lines as they
are.

Its London (England) offices are 124 High Holborn, 449 Strand, 3
Adelaide street and 139 Cheapside. Its Manchester (England) office, 1
and 3 Princess street. Its Paris office, 35 Boulevard des Capucines.
Its New York office, 409 Broadway. Its Boston office, 5 State street.
Its Chicago offices, 60 and 62 Clark street, Palmer House, in Grand
Pacific Hotel and at its Passenger Station on the corner Wells and
Kinzie streets. Its St. Paul office, corner Third and Jackson streets.
Its Minneapolis office, 13 Nicollet House. Its Council Bluffs offices
are at the Transfer Depot, C. & N.-W. Ry. Depot on Broadway and at the
corner of Broadway and Pearl streets. Its Omaha offices, 1324 Farnham,
corner Fourteenth street, and at U. P. Depot. Its Denver office, 8
Windsor Hotel Block. Its San Francisco office, No. 2 New Montgomery
street, in Palace Hotel.




Waltham Watches

WITH TWENTY-FOUR HOUR DIVISION DIALS

[Illustration]

RECOGNIZING THE NECESSITY OF HAVING WATCHES THAT CONFORM TO THE

New System of Indicating Time

ADOPTED BY SOME OF THE RAILROADS, OF

COUNTING THE HOURS FROM ONE TO TWENTY-FOUR CONSECUTIVELY,

THE AMERICAN WATCH COMPANY

Of Waltham, Mass.,

Are now prepared to furnish Watches as indicated by the above Cut.

THESE DIALS CAN ALSO BE SUBSTITUTED FOR THOSE NOW IN USE AT A VERY
SMALL EXPENSE.

FOR SALE BY ALL JEWELERS.




[Illustration]

THE PALMER, CHICAGO.

WILLIS HOWE, Managing Partner.

AMERICAN AND EUROPEAN PLAN. ENTIRELY FIRE-PROOF. 750 ROOMS.




_GRIFFIN & WELLS FOUNDRY CO._

RAILROAD CAR, ENGINE AND STREET CAR WHEELS.

  ANNUAL CAPACITY,       50,000 WHEELS.

[Illustration]

Rates secured and Shipments made to all parts of the West and South.
Contracts made for Yearly or other Supply. Mileage or Time Guarantee
given. All Orders and Correspondence will receive prompt attention.
References furnished.

OFFICE AND WORKS:

  PAULINA ST., SOUTH OF BLUE ISLAND AVE.    CHICAGO.


THOS. F. GRIFFIN & SONS,

MANUFACTURERS OF

CAR WHEELS AND CASTINGS

OFFICE AND WORKS:

  COR. OF FOREST AVE. AND N.Y.C. & H.R.R.R.      BUFFALO, N. Y.


GRIFFIN CAR WHEEL CO.

RAILROAD CAR WHEELS AND CASTINGS.

  Annual Capacity, 100,000 Wheels.      10,000 Tons Castings.

[Illustration]

Rates secured and Shipments made to all parts of the United States.
Special attention given to Car and Engine Wheels for Railroad Use.
Mileage Guaranteed. Contracts made for Yearly or other Supply.
Correspondence solicited.

OFFICE AND WORKS:

  COR. FOUNDRY ST. AND MICHIGAN CENTRAL R. R.      DETROIT, MICH.




THE Griffin Wheel

MANUFACTURED BY

GRIFFIN CAR WHEEL CO.

DETROIT, MICH.


GRIFFIN & WELLS FOUNDRY CO.

CHICAGO, ILL.


_THOS. F. GRIFFIN & SON_,

BUFFALO, N. Y.


COMBINED DAILY CAPACITY,

800 Wheels per Day and 60 Tons Castings

EXTRA HEAVY WHEELS FOR ENGINE AND

PASSENGER SERVICE.

All Mileage Guaranteed.




THE Lake Shore & Michigan Southern RAILWAY

AND ITS CONNECTIONS

FORMS THE GREAT THOROUGHFARE

BETWEEN THE

EAST and WEST

And Experienced Travelers will tell you it is the BEST Route

"by a large majority."


THIS LINE IS A

DOUBLE TRACK RAILWAY

_AND THE ONLY ROUTE RUNNING SOLID TRAINS_

Between CHICAGO and BUFFALO, through Union Depots, for all connections.

Its equipment is first-class in every respect--such as perfect
Road-Bed, Iron and Stone Bridges, Westinghouse Automatic Safety Brakes,
Miller Platform Coupler and Buffer, Magnificent Parlor Coaches for Day
Travel, Elegant Day Coaches, and the Palace Sleeping Coaches. Well,
words are inadequate to express their Durability and Splendor. They are
simply Superb. These Coaches are run daily, through, between CHICAGO,
NEW YORK and BOSTON, without change.


ONE GREAT FEATURE IN THIS LINE IS, THAT IT IS THE

ONLY ROUTE BETWEEN CHICAGO and the EAST

THAT IS TOTALLY DEVOID OF TRANSFERS BY FERRY BOATS.

And the traveling public should certainly appreciate this great
advantage over all other lines, as transfers by ferries are very
tedious and annoying to the traveler who is anxious to reach the
objective point without delay. Further comments are unnecessary.


All Agents sell Tickets via this popular line, and when passengers ask
for them over the "LAKE SHORE," they smile and say, "You are on the
right track," and they know.


  =C. B. FOSTER=, Western Passenger Agent, Chicago, Ill.
    =W. P. JOHNSON=, Gen. Passenger Agent, Chicago, Ill.
      =P. P. WRIGHT=, Gen. Superintendent, Cleveland, Ohio.




WEST SHORE ROUTE

New York, West Shore & Buffalo R'y

THE NEW SHORT LINE

To All Points between the

EAST AND WEST

_THE BEST CONSTRUCTED LINE ON THE AMERICAN CONTINENT._


NEW PULLMAN

BUFFET SLEEPING AND PARLOR CARS

DOUBLE TRACK, STEEL RAILS, and BEAUTIFUL SCENERY

THROUGH THE Mohawk Valley and Picturesque Hudson,

MAKING THE SHORTEST LINE BETWEEN

CHICAGO, NEW YORK AND BOSTON

VIA BUFFALO and NIAGARA FALLS.

Passengers going to PHILADELPHIA, BALTIMORE and WASHINGTON

will SAVE TRANSFERS by taking this Popular Route.


Tickets via New York, West Shore & Buffalo Railway are for sale at all
Principal Ticket Offices throughout the country, and in Chicago at the
following places, where Sleeping-car Berths can be secured: 103 South
Clark Street, 47 Monroe Street, Palmer House, Grand Pacific Hotel,
Grand Union Passenger Station, Polk Street, and at General Office, 75
South Clark Street.

  HENRY MONETT,
  Gen'l Passenger Agent, NEW YORK.

  C. E. LAMBERT,
  Gen'l West'n Passenger Agent, 75 Clark St., CHICAGO.




ERIE RY.

[Illustration: View of Niagara Falls from Suspension Bridge.]

[Illustration: Starucca Valley, on the Erie.]

THE Scenic Route OF AMERICA

A continual Panorama of Magnificent Scenery from the Lakes to the
Seaboard. The Elegant Pullman Service via the

ERIE RAILWAY

And its Connections is unsurpassed by any Route to or from the EAST.

  _IF ON A BUSINESS TRIP, TAKE THE ERIE_,
    _IF ON A PLEASURE TRIP, TAKE THE ERIE_,
      _UNDER ALL CIRCUMSTANCES, TAKE THE ERIE_,

And you will travel over a Railway unequalled in facilities for Comfort
and Safety.

  JNO. N. ABBOTT,
  Gen'l Pass. Agent, NEW YORK.

  W. H. HURLBURT,
  Gen'l Western Pass. Agent, CHICAGO.




_JONES & LAUGHLINS, Limited_,

MANUFACTURERS

IRON, STEEL, NAILS

Cold Rolled Iron and Steel,

SPIKES, BOLTS, CHAINS,

Railway Supplies

HEAVY HARDWARE,

Lake and Canal Streets,

CHICAGO.




LEHIGH VALLEY COAL COMPANY,

Miners and Shippers of

WYOMING AND LEHIGH

COALS

_R. M. CHERRIE, General Western Agent_,

90 and 92 DEARBORN STREET,

CHICAGO.




      _NEW YORK,           BOSTON,            CHICAGO,_
  _3 Cliff Street.   127 Oliver Street.   210 Lake Street._

Hussey, Howe & Co., Limited,

CAST STEEL,

PITTSBURGH, PA.

  _C. C. HUSSEY,        Penn Avenue       JAMES W. BROWN,_
         _Chairman.    and 17th Street.     Sec'y and Treas'r._




LORD & THOMAS,

We prepare Advertisements, and contract to insert them in any number of
newspapers desired. Our facilities in our line are unequaled.

The large amount of business we control enables us to secure from
the Best Mediums the Lowest Rates obtainable, for the benefit of our
patrons.

[Illustration: ADVERTISE JUDICIOUSLY TRADE MARK.]

NEWSPAPER ADVERTISING, CHICAGO, ILL.




Steam Heating and Ventilating.


  Low Pressure
    Steam Warming
      And Ventilating
   APPARATUS.

  Simplified and adapted to warming
    _DWELLINGS_,
       _CHURCHES_,
         _BANKS_ and
            _PUBLIC BUILDINGS._

Send for descriptive pamphlet.

[Illustration]

BAKER'S PATENT

Hot Water

CAR WARMER.

Adopted by nearly all Railroads as the

STANDARD HEATER.

Prices Greatly Reduced.


BAKER, SMITH & CO.,

81 and 83 Jackson Street, Chicago.




THE SCENIC LINE OF THE WORLD.

Denver & Rio Grande R'y

THE MID-CONTINENTAL ROUTE

TO Salt Lake and the Golden Gate.

  _THIS LINE PENETRATES THE MOST PICTURESQUE PARTS OF COLORADO, NEW
   MEXICO AND UTAH, AND IS THE FAVORITE ROUTE FOR BUSINESS OR PLEASURE._

=IN COLORADO= the traveler beholds scenery excelling in variety, beauty
and grandeur that of Switzerland. He traverses canons fifteen miles
in length, with perpendicular walls more than half a mile in height.
He crosses the Rocky Range at an elevation of over 11,000 feet, and
from this lofty pass gazes upward 3,000 feet to the summits of the
snow-crowded peaks. _En route_ to the Pacific Coast he passes through
innumerable places of interest, among which are the Royal Gorge, Grand
Canon of the Arkansas, Poncho Pass, Marshall Pass, the valleys of the
Uncompahgre, Gunnison and Grand, Black Canon, Castle Gate, Wasatch
Summit and Salt Lake City.

=IN NEW MEXICO= he finds ruins more ancient than those of the
Parthenon or Colosseum--the crumbling habitations of the pre-historic
Cliff-Dwellers; he beholds the quaint architecture of the
Spanish-Mexicans or the pueblos of the descendants of the Montezumas.

=IN UTAH= he can bathe in the Great Salt Lake, and inspect the wonders
of the City of the Saints.

THESE MARVELS OF NATURE AND ART

CAN BE REACHED IN

Pullman Palace Buffet Cars

VIA THE

DENVER & RIO GRANDE R'Y,

THE ONLY LINE

Passing through Colorado Springs, Pueblo, Salida, Gunnison, Grand
Junction and Salt Lake City.

    When I go to the coast I'll lay out my plan,
        Said I to myself, said I,
    To have all the pleasure and ease that I can,
        Said I to myself, said I.
    There's one way to do it, as all will agree,
    And that is to go via D. & R. G.--
    Up over the mountains and down to the sea,
        Said I to myself, said I.

  D.C. DODGE, General Manager,   F.C. NIMS, Gen. Pass. and Ticket Agent,
                        DENVER, COLORADO




  H. S. PICKANDS,}                   PICKANDS, MATHER & CO.
                 }-Chicago              Cleveland.
  W. L. BROWN,   }

PICKANDS, BROWN & CO.,

Manufacturers, Importers and Dealers in

PIG IRON

AND IRON ORE


95 DEARBORN STREET,

CHICAGO.




THE CHICAGO RAWHIDE MFG. CO.

MANUFACTURERS OF

RAWHIDE BELTING, LACE LEATHER ROPE, LARIATS

Fly Nets, Picker Leather, Whips, Washers, Hame Straps, Hame Strings,
and Halters, and other Rawhide Goods of all kinds, by Krueger's Patent.

75 and 77 EAST OHIO STREET, CHICAGO


[Illustration]

It is only by using the best of Belting, _i.e._, such as will wear
longest, slip least, transmit the greatest amount of power and work
with the greatest steadiness, that machinery can be utilized to its
full capacity, and can be relied on as to durability. The belt that
will transmit the most power with least strain on the machinery is the
_cheapest and the best_. Such are the goods manufactured and sold on
guarantee by this Company, and used by the Chicago & Alton Railway and
other railroads.

[Illustration: NATIONAL EXPOSITION OF RAILWAY APPLIANCES CHICAGO 1883

AWARDED TO

THE Chicago Rawhide M'F'G CO.

For Rawhide Belting, Lace Leather and Rope.]


  A. B. SPURLING, President.
    W. H. PREBLE, Secretary and Treasurer.
      A. C. KRUEGER, Superintendent.




[Illustration: KNISELY AND MILLER]

68 to 74 W. MONROE STREET, CHICAGO,

Slate, Tin and Iron

ROOFERS

MANUFACTURERS OF

CORRUGATED IRON FOR ROOFING,

GALVANIZED IRON CORNICES, ETC.

The Hayes Patent

SKYLIGHTS

(UNDER LICENSE),

_KNISELY'S PATENT IRON LATH_

LIGHTNING RODS.

Special attention given to first-class work, and to shipping work
knocked down, to be put together and up by local mechanics.

Send for Illustrated Catalogue and Prices.




INCORPORATED 1864.

  Steel Plate and Lithography.      Railway Annuals a Specialty.

WESTERN BANK NOTE COMPANY,

CHICAGO.

  _Bonds, Certificates_,
    _Drafts, Checks_,
      _Merchants' Stationery_,              C. C. CHENEY, President.
        _Bankers' Supplies._             C. A. CHAPMAN, Treasurer.




_The Only Hotel Fronting on the beautiful Lake and Park. Five Minutes
 from all Railroad Depots, Places of Business and Amusement._

  THE BEST LOCATED HOTEL
  In the World.

[Illustration]

  POPULAR PRICES:
  $3 and $3.50 per Day.

LELAND HOTEL

  AMERICAN PLAN.      WARREN F. LELAND, Proprietor.

COR. MICHIGAN AVE. BOULEVARD AND JACKSON ST.




THE LARGEST AND MOST COMPLETE

JOB AND BOOK PRINTING HOUSE

IN AMERICA.

RAND, MCNALLY & CO.

_148-154 MONROE ST., CHICAGO, ILL._

FINE COLOR PRINTING

  ENGRAVERS,         ELECTROTYPERS

             PRINTERS

  LITHOGRAPHERS,      BOOK BINDERS

MAP ENGRAVERS AND PUBLISHERS

_Rand, McNally's Indexed Atlas of the World._

_Rand, McNally & Co.'s Business Atlas and Shippers' Guide of the
    United States._

_Rand, McNally & Co.'s Celebrated Indexed Pocket Maps of all the
    States and Territories in the United States._

_Rand, McNally's Encyclopaedia of Agriculture._

_Rand, McNally & Co.'s Bankers' Directory._




A Great American Railway.


  _The Chicago and Atlantic Railway runs solid Pullman trains, the
  finest ever built, daily between Chicago and New York, etc., by way
  of the Erie Railway, and through its valuable connections reaches
  every important point in the entire country. The construction and
  equipment of the road are of the most perfect description, all
  that modern skill can compass having been called into requisition
  to ensure safety, comfort, speed and reliable connections, without
  having to change cars. This popular line, being almost literally
  straight, forms the shortest, quickest and most direct route to Lake
  Chautauqua, the highest navigated water on the globe. In equipment
  the Chicago and Atlantic Railway is excelled by none and equaled
  by few roads in the world. Their superb sleeping, drawing-room and
  thoroughfare coaches are simply models of elegance and comfort and
  are lighted with the brilliant Pintsch gaslight. Clean bedding, thick
  hair mattresses, thorough ventilation and absolute safety, with
  polite conductors and porters accompanying each car to provide for
  the wants of passengers, are valuable facts not to be overlooked.
  Each train has its smoking cars, which among other novelties contain
  a buffet, where the traveler may lunch at his leisure. Indeed, the
  company have provided every luxury, convenience and solid comfort for
  the traveling public, hence their road is liberally patronized._

  J. C. WILLIAMS,                       S. W. SNOW,
      Gen'l Superintendent,                Gen'l Passenger Agent,
                            CHICAGO.




  NO CHANGE OF CARS OF ANY CLASS     {CHICAGO AND KANSAS CITY.
               AND                   {CHICAGO AND ST. LOUIS.
  Two Trains a Day Each Way between  {ST. LOUIS AND KANSAS CITY.

[Illustration]

Chicago & Alton R. R.

THE PIONEER

PALACE RECLINING CHAIR CAR ROUTE

_The Pioneer Palace Dining Car Route_

The Pioneer Pullman Palace Sleeping Car Route

TWO TRAINS DAILY, SUNDAYS INCLUDED,

Between CHICAGO and KANSAS CITY, and between ST. LOUIS and KANSAS CITY

NIGHT EXPRESS DAILY, SUNDAYS INCLUDED.

[hand] DAY EXPRESS DAILY, Sundays excepted, between CHICAGO and ST.
LOUIS.




3 GREAT CITIES

OF THE WEST

[Illustration]

LINKED TOGETHER

BY THE

CHICAGO & ALTON R. R.

NO CHANGE OF CARS OF ANY CLASS BETWEEN

   CHICAGO             CHICAGO             ST. LOUIS
     AND                 AND                  AND
  KANSAS CITY.        ST. LOUIS.           KANSAS CITY.

Union Depots in Chicago, East St. Louis, St. Louis and Kansas City.


NO OTHER LINE RUNS PALACE DINING CARS

Between CHICAGO and KANSAS CITY, CHICAGO and ST. LOUIS, and ST. LOUIS
and KANSAS CITY.

Meals, equal to those served in any first-class hotel, only 75 cents.

The only line running a sufficient number of Elegant and Comfortable

PALACE RECLINING CHAIR CARS

Free of Extra Charge, in all its Through Trains, Day and Night, Without
Change, to accommodate all its patrons.

  PULLMAN PALACE SLEEPING CARS       The Finest, Best and Safest in use
                                                 anywhere.

The BEST and QUICKEST ROUTE from CHICAGO, TO AND FROM MEMPHIS, MOBILE,
NEW ORLEANS AND ALL POINTS SOUTH VIA ST. LOUIS.

The SHORT LINE to and from MISSOURI, ARKANSAS, TEXAS, KANSAS, COLORADO,
NEW MEXICO, MEXICO, ARIZONA, NEBRASKA, CALIFORNIA, OREGON, WASHINGTON
TERRITORY, Etc.

THE GREAT EXCURSION ROUTE BETWEEN THE NORTH AND SOUTH

AND TO AND FROM

KANSAS LANDS, AND COLORADO, NEW MEXICO AND CALIFORNIA HEALTH AND
PLEASURE RESORTS AND THE MINING DISTRICTS OF THE GREAT WEST.

For Tickets and Information apply at any Coupon Ticket Office in the
United States and Canada, or to

  JAMES CHARLTON, General Passenger and Ticket Agent,
            210 Dearborn street, near corner Adams street, Chicago.
  J. C. McMULLIN, Vice-President, Chicago.
  C. H. CHAPPEL, General Manager, Chicago.




THE GREAT THROUGH CAR LINE

_BETWEEN THE MISSOURI RIVER AND THE PACIFIC_.

Pullman Palace Sleeping Cars

FROM KANSAS CITY TO SAN FRANCISCO

WITHOUT CHANGE

OVER THE SANTA FE ROUTE

The Atchison, Topeka & Santa Fe R. R. offers the public a choice of

THREE ROUTES TO THE PACIFIC COAST

=No. I.= is the ALBUQUERQUE SHORT LINE, which carries Pullman Palace
Sleeping Cars from Kansas City to San Francisco without change. The
tourist by this line may visit en route the famous Hot Springs at Las
Vegas, the ancient City of Santa Fe, the older Pueblo of the Zunis,
the uninhabited abodes of the Cliff-Dwellers, the petrified forests,
that most wonderful of all nature's works,

THE GRAND CANON OF THE RIO COLORADO

and the rare beauties of the far famed YOSEMITE VALLEY.

=No. II.= is the old and popular Southern Route, over the Atchison,
Topeka & Santa Fe and Southern Pacific Railroads, by way of Deming and
Los Angeles, a favorite route to Southern California.

=No. III.= is the Northern Route, over the Atchison, Topeka & Santa
Fe, Denver & Rio Grande and Central Pacific Railroads. On this route
through passengers are given side trips to Denver and Leadville free
of charge for transportation, so that these two mountain cities are
placed, with Salt Lake City, on the trans-continental line of travel.


TWO LINES TO MEXICO

The CHIHUAHUA ROUTE is the Atchison, Topeka & Santa Fe to El Paso and
the Mexican Central to the interior of Mexico. This line will be opened
early in the spring through to the City of Mexico.

The GUAYMAS ROUTE extends from Kansas City to Guaymas, on the Gulf of
California, in the Republic of Mexico.


  W. F. WHITE,
       _General Passenger and Ticket Agent, TOPEKA, KANSAS_.




  ESTABLISHED 1844.
  By "Chicago Evening Journal."

  Destroyed by Fire
  Oct. 9, 1871.

  RE-ESTABLISHED 1872
  By JNO. B. JEFFERY.

  Destroyed by Fire
  Dec. 1, 1883.

  Re-Established and Incorporated 1885.
  JNO. B. JEFFERY, Prest. and Treas.

THE JNO. B. JEFFERY PRINTING COMPANY OF CHICAGO,

_LARGEST AND MOST COMPLETE_

Job Printing, Publishing, Lithographing, Engraving

AND _SHOW PRINTING ESTABLISHMENT IN THE WEST_.

PUBLISHERS OF THE ONLY

Theatrical Guide and Directory,

AND PROMOTERS OF SHOW AND AMUSEMENT INTERESTS OF AMERICA.

  JNO. B. JEFFERY,
       President and Treasurer.




FORT WAYNE AND Pennsylvania Line

51 MILES THE SHORTEST

To New York City.

ONLY DIRECT LINE

TO PHILADELPHIA

BEST LINE

TO BALTIMORE AND WASHINGTON.

RUNS THE

_Only Chicago and New York_

LIMITED EXPRESS

PULLMAN CARS ON ALL TRAINS.




Transcriber's Notes:


Words surrounded by _ are italicized.

Words surrounded by = are bold.

Variable spellings have been kept.





End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Parody on Iolanthe, by D. Dalziel

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