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The Laird o' Coul's Ghost.




  _AN EIGHTEENTH-CENTURY CHAP-BOOK._

  The Laird o' Coul's Ghost.


  FROM THE ORIGINAL MS. IN THE POSSESSION OF
  THE REV. DR. GORDON, ST. ANDREW'S, GLASGOW.


  LONDON:
  ELLIOT STOCK, 62, PATERNOSTER ROW.
  1892.




INTROIT.


The MS. of _Coul's Ghost_ was found among the Papers of Collector
Hamilton, of Dalzell (pronounced _Deell_), who died in the summer of 1788,
aged 91 years. This incident made him 25 years old when this Story was
fledged, which was in 1722. In 1733 Lady Anne Spencer, Duchess of
Hamilton, came to Hamilton Palace, and the Collector gave to Her Grace
this Story to read. The Duke, to play a practical joke on the Collector,
caused one of his servants to whisper to him while at supper, that there
was a Gentleman calling, who desired to see him immediately. Being asked
Who he was, the valet answered, "_The Laird o' Coul_." The Guests were all
amused at the Collector's embarrassment, who sat still and allowed the
"Gentleman" to await in the Hall!

_The Laird o' Coul's Ghost_ first appeared in type in 1750, and was
eagerly bought by all and sundry from the _Flying Stationers_ who hawked
it about the country. Mrs. Ogilvie delivered it to Watkins, the King's
Printer, which was Published from Newcastle. In 1788 a fanatical
character, Mrs. Elizabeth Steuart, of Coltness, termed "Aunt Betty,"
became a convert to the Halcyon notions of Emmanuel Swedenborg, founder of
"the New Jerusalem Sect." This personage was related to Henry Erskine,
Lord Advocate for Scotland, and was enraptured with the Penny Chap-Book:
so much so that she embodied it in her "Remarks and Illustrations of the
World of Spirits," which she strictly enjoined her Nephew to print after
her decease. Not a Copy of this Brochure of 206 pages is in any of our
University Libraries; and a few weeks ago L3 3s. were paid for a soiled
copy. "Aunt Betty" does not miss to note one point in _The Laird o' Coul's
Ghost_ that may insinuate her imaginations about Angels and the Unseen;
while she adverts to the Ghosts of Lord Clarendon, Sir George Villiars,
the father of the Duke of Buckingham, and to the Dialogue of Dives and
Lazarus, in that remarkable Parable. She ferreted out from Mrs. Henrietta
Hog, Edinburgh, daughter of the Rev. Mr. Ogilvie, Innerwick, that the
Sequel was undoubtedly the genuine Copy in her father's handwriting. No
declaration has been given how the MS. came into Collector Hamilton's
possession. Mr. Ogilvie died soon after the Conference.

J. F. S. G.

  ABBACY OF SUSANNA RIG,
      GLASGOW,
         _Xtmas, 1891_.




The First Conference

     _An Account of Mr. Maxwell Laird of Coul his Appearance after Death
     to Mr. Ogilvie a Minister of the present Establishment at Innerwick,
     3 Miles East from Dunbar._


Upon the 3d Day of February, 1722, at seven a clock at Night after I had
parted with Thurston [his Name Cant], and was coming up the Burial Road,
one came riding up after me: upon hearing the Noise of his Horse's feet, I
took it to be Thurston, but upon looking back, and seeing the Horse of a
greyish Colour, I called "Who is there?" The Answer was, "The Laird of
Coul [his Name Maxwell], be not afraid." Then looking to him by the Help
of the dark Light which the Moon afforded, I took him to be Collector
Castellow designing to put a Trick upon me, and immediately I struck at
him with all my Force, with my Cane, thinking I mould leave upon him a
Mark, to make him remember his Presumption; but being sensible I aimed as
well as ever I did in my Life, yet my Cane finding no Resistance, but
flying out of my Hand the Distance of about 60 Feet, and observing it by
its white Head, I dismounted and took it up, and had some Difficulty in
mounting again, what by the ramping of my Horse, and what by Reason of a
certain Kind of Trembling throughout my whole Joints; Something likewise
of Anger had its share in the Confusion; for, as I thought, he laughed
when my Staff flew away; Coming up with him again, who halted all the Time
I sought my Staff, I asked once more, "Who he was?" He answered, "The
Laird of Coul." I enquired--j{st}, "If he was the Laird of Coul, what
brought him hither?" and "What was his Business with me?"

C. The reason of my waiting on you is, that I know you are disposed to do
for me a Thing which none of your Brethren in Nithsdale will so much as
attempt, tho' it serve to ever so good Purposes. I told him I would never
refuse to do a Thing to serve a good Purpose, If I thought I was obliged
to do it as my Duty. He answered, since I had undertaken what he found few
in Nithsdale would, for he had tryed some upon that Subject, who were more
obliged to him than ever I was, or to any Person living: I drew my Horse,
and halted in Surprize, asking What I had undertaken? He answered, that on
the Sabbath last, I had heartily condemned M{r}. Paton, and the Rest of
the Ministers in Dumfries Presbytery for dissuading Dr. Menzies's Man,
from keeping his Appointment with me, and that if you had been in their
Place, you would have persuaded the Lad to do as I desired him; and that
you would have gone with him, lest he had been feared; and that if you had
been in Mr. Paton's Place, you would have delivered my Commissions your
self, since it tended to do some People Justice.

O. Pray, Coul, who informed you that I talked at that Rate?

C. You must know, that we are acquainted with many Things, that the Living
know nothing about. These Things you did say, and much more to that
Purpose, and all that I want is, that you fulfill your Promise, and
deliver my Commissions to my loving Wife.

O. 'Tis a Pity, Coul, that you who know so many Things, should not know
the Difference between an absolute, and a conditional Promise. I did
indeed at the Time you mention, blame Mr. Paton, for I think him justly
blameable, for hindering the Lad to meet with you, and if I had been in
his Place, I would have acted quite the Reverse: but did I ever say, that
if you would come to Innerwick, and employ me, that I would go all the way
to Dumfries upon that Errand? That is what never so much as once entered
into my Thought.

C. What was in your Thought I do not pretend to know; but I can depend
upon my Information, that these were your _Words_: but I see you are in
some Disorder, I will wait on you again, when you have more presence of
mind.

By the Time we were got to James Dickson's Inclosure below the Churchyard,
and while I was recollecting in my mind, whether ever I had spoken these
Words he alledged, he broke from me thro' the Churchyard with greater
violence, than ever any man on horseback is capable of, and with such a
singing and buzzing noise, as put me in greater Disorder, than I was all
the Time I was with him. I came to my House, and my Wife observed
something more than ordinary Paleness in my Countenance, and would alledge
that something ailed me. I called for a Dram & told her I was a little
uneasie; after I found myself a little eased and refreshed, I retired to
my Closet, to meditate on this the most astonishing Adventure of my whole
Life.




The 2d Conference.


Upon the 5th of March 1722. Being at Blarehead baptizing the Shepherd's
Child, I came off at Sunsetting, or, a very little after. Near Will.
White's March the Laird of Coul came up with me on Horseback as formerly,
and, after his first Salutation bid me not be afraid, for he would do me
no Harm. I told him I was not in the least afraid, in the Name of God, and
of Christ my Saviour, that he would do the least Harm to me: for, I knew
that He in whom I trusted was stronger than all them put together, and if
any of them should attempt even to do the Horse I rode upon, Harm, as you
have done to Dr. Menzies' man,[1] if it be true that is said, and
generally believed about Dumfries, I have free access to complain to my
Lord and Master, to the Lash of whose Resentment you are as much liable
now as before.

C. You need not multiply Words upon that Head, for you are as safe with
me, and safer, if safer can be, than when I was alive.

I said, Well then, Coul, Let me have a peaceable and easy Conversation
with you for the Time we ride together, and give me some Information about
the Affairs of the other World, for no man inclines to lose his Time, in
conversing with the Dead, without having a Prospect of hearing and
learning something that may be usefull.

C. Well, Sir, I will satisfy you, as far as I think it proper and
convenient. Let me know what Information you want from me.

O. May I then ask you, if you be in a State of Happiness or not?

C. There are a great many Things that I _can_ answer, which the Living are
entirely ignorant of: there are many more Things, that notwithstanding the
additional Knowledge I have acquired, since my Death, that I _cannot_
answer, and there are several Things and Questions that you may start, of
which the last is one, that I _will_ not answer.

O. Then I know not how to manage our Conversation, for whatever I shall
enquire of you, I see you can easily shift me, so that I might profit more
by conversing with myself.

C. You may try.

O. Well then, what sort of a Body is it that you appear in, and what sort
of a Horse is it that you ride on, that appears so full of mettle?

C. You may depend upon it, 'tis not the same Body that I was witness to
your Marriage in, nor in which I died, for that is in the Grave rotting;
but it is such a Body as answers me in a Moment, for I can fly as fast as
my Soul can do without it, so that I can go to Dumfries and return again,
before you ride twice the Length of your Horse; nay if I incline to go to
London, or to Jerusalem, or to the Moon, if you please, I can perform all
these Journeys equally soon, for it costs me nothing but a Thought or
Wish; for this Body you see, is as fleet as your Thought, for in the same
Moment of Time that you can carry your Thoughts to Rome, I can go there in
Person. And for my Horse, he is, much like myself, for 'tis Andrew
Johnstoun who was seven years my Tennant, and he died about 48 Hours
before me.

O. So it seems when Andrew Johnstoun inclines to ride, you must serve him
for an Horse, as he now does you.

C. You are mistaken.

O. I thought all Distinction between Mistresses and Maids, Lairds &
Tennants had been done away at Death.

C. True 'tis so, yet still you don't take up the matter.

O. Is then, Sir, this one of the Questions you _will not_ answer?

C. You are still mistaken; for that Question I _can_ answer, and after
this you may readily understand.

O. Tell me then, Coul, have you never yet appeared before God, nor
received any Sentence from him as a Judge.

C. Never yet.

O. I know you was a Scholar, Coul; and 'tis generally believed there is a
private Judgment, besides the general at the great Day. The former is
immediately after Death. Upon this he interrupted me, crying, No such
Thing, no such Thing, no Tryal till the last Day: The Heaven which good
Men enjoy immediately after Death, consists only in the Serenity of their
Thoughts, the Satisfaction of a good Conscience, and the certain Hope they
have of an Eternity of Joy when that Day shall come. The Punishment or
Hell of the wicked immediately after Death, consists in the dreadful
Things of their awakened Conscience, and the Terror of facing the great
Judge, and the sensible Apprehensions of eternal Torments ensuing; and
this bears still a due Proportion to the Evils they have done, when they
were living. So indeed the State of some good Folks differs but little in
Happiness from what they enjoyed upon Earth, save only they are freed from
the Body and the Sins and Sorrows that attend it. And, on the other Hand,
there are some, who may be said rather not to have been _good_ than that
they have been _wicked_ while living: their Condition is not easily
distinguished from that of the _former_, and under that Class comes a
great Herd of Souls, a vast Number of your ignorant People, who have not
much minded the Concerns of Eternity, but, at the same Time, have lived in
much Indolence, Ignorance, and Innocence.

O. I always thought that their rejecting the Terms of Salvation offered,
was sufficient Ground for God to punish them with his eternal Displeasure.
And as to their Ignorance, that could never excuse them, since they lived
in a Place of the World, where the Knowledge of these Things might easily
have been attained.

C. They never properly rejected the Terms of Salvation, they never,
strictly speaking, rejected Christ, poor Souls! they had as great Liking
both to Him, and to Heaven, as their gross understandings were capable of;
and as to their Ignorance, impartial Reason must make many allowances,
such as, the Stupidity of their Parents, their want of Education, their
Distance from People of good Sense and Knowledge, the uninterrupted
Application they were obliged to give to their secular affairs, for their
daily Bread, the impious Treachery of their Pastor, whom they heard
perhaps but once a month, or so, and thro' his unfaithfulness are
perswaded, that if they be of such or such a Party all is well; and many
other Considerations of the like Nature, which God who is pure and perfect
Reason itself will not overlook. These are not so much under the Load of
the Divine Displeasure, as they are _out of His Graces and Favours_, for
you know it is one Thing to be discourted, and quite anoyr Thing to be
persecuted with all the Power and Rage of an incensed earthly King. So I
assure you, men's Faces in this World are not more various and different,
than their Conditions are after Death.

O. I am loath to believe all that you have said at this Time, Coul; but I
will not dispute these matters with you, besides, some Things you have
advanced, seem to contradict the Scriptures, which I shall ever look upon
as the infallible Truths of God; for I find by the Parable of Dives and
Lazarus, that one was immediately carried up by the Angels to Abraham's
Bosom, and the other thrust down to a Place of Torment.

C. Excuse me, Sir, that does not contradict one word that I have said; but
you seem not to understand the Parable, whose only End is to illustrate
the Truth, that a Man may be very happy and flourishing in this World, and
most wretched in the next; and that a man may be most miserable and
wretched in this World, and most glorious and happy in the next.

O. Be it so, Coul, I yield that Point, and shall pass to another, which
has afforded me much Speculation since our last encounter, and that is,
how you came to know that I talked after the manner I did concerning Mr.
Paton and you on the j{st} Sabbath of February. Was you present with us
but invisible.

He answered somewhat haughtily, No, Sir, I was not present myself.

O. I would not have you to be angry, Coul; I proposed this Question for my
own satisfaction, but, if you judge it improper to answer it, Let it pass.

After he had paused, with his Eyes fixed, as I thought, on the Ground for
about 3 or 4 Seconds at most; with some Haste and seeming Cheerfulness, he
says: Well, Sir, I will satisfy you in that Point. You must know, that
from Time to Time, there are sent from Heaven Angels to guard and
Comfort, and to do oyr special Services to good People, and even the
Spirits of good men departed are employed on that very Errand.

O. And do you think every Man has a Guardian Angel?

C. No, but a great many particular Men have, and there are but few Houses,
of Distinction especially, but what have one attending them. And from what
you have already heard of these Spirits, 'tis no difficult Matter to
understand, how he may be serviceable to each particular Member of it,
tho' in different Places, at a great Distance. Many are the good offices
that the Angels do to Men that fear God, tho' many Times they are not
sensible of it, and I know assuredly, that one powerful Angel, or even an
active clever Spirit departed, may be sufficient for some villages: But
for your great Cities, such as London, Edinburgh, or the like, there is
one great Angel that has the Superintendency of the whole; and there are
inferior ones, or Spirits departed, to whose particular Charge, such a
particular man of Weight and Bussiness is committed. Now, Sir, the Kingdom
of Sathan does ape the Kingdom of Christ as much in matters of Politicks
as can be: well knowing that the Court of Wisdom is above; so that, hence
are sent out Missionaries too in the same order. But because, the Kingdom
of Sathan is much better replenished than the other, instead of one Devil,
in many Instances, there are 2 or 3 commissioned to attend a particular
Family, if it be a Family of great Influence, Power, or Distinction.

O. I read that there are 10-000d Times 10-000d Angels that wait on God,
and sing his Praise, and do his Will; and I cannot understand how the good
Angels should be inferior in Number to the Evil.

C. Did I not say that whatever the Number be, yet the Spirits departed
were employed in the same Bussiness? So, as to the Number of original
Devils, whereof Sathan is the chief, I cannot determine. But you need not
doubt that there are more Spirits departed in that Place you in a loose
general Sense call _Hell_, by almost an Infinity, by what are gone to that
Place, which in the like Sense, you call _Heaven_, which likewise are
employed to the same Purpose. And I can assure you, by the Bye, that there
are as great Differences between Angels, both good and bad, as there are
amongst Men, with Respect to their Sense, Knowledge, Cleverness, and
Cunning or Action. Nay, which is more, the departed Spirits on both
Sides, out doe Severals, from their j{st} Departure, of the Original
Angels; This you'l think a Paradox, yet 'tis true.

O. I don't doubt of it, but what is that to my Question, concerning which
I am sollicitous?

C. Take a little Patience, Sir; from what I have said, you might have
understood me, if you had your Thoughts about you, but, I shall explain my
self to you. Both the good and bad Angels have their stated Times of
Rendezvous, and the particular Angel that has the charge either of Towns,
Cities or Kingdoms, not to mention inferiour Villages and Families, and
Persons; all that are transacted in these several Parts of the Country,
are then made open, and at their Encounters, on each Side, every Thing is
told, as in your Paroch, at Milns, Kilns and Smiddies, only with this
Difference, that many Things false are told at the living Encounters, but
nothing but what is exact Truth is told amongst the Dead. Only, I must
observe to you, that as I am credibly informed, several of the inferiour
bad Angels, or Spirits of wicked departed, have told mighty Things which
they have done; and when a more intelligent Spirit has been sent out upon
Enquiry, and, the Report of the former, seeming doubtful, he brings in a
contrary Report, and making it appear Truth, the former fares very ill.

O. Does ever the like happen among good Angels?

C. I believe never, for their Regard to Truth prevents it; for while they
observe Truth, they do their Bussiness, and keep their Station, and God is
Truth.

O. So much Truth being among the good Angels, I shall be apt to think,
that Lyes and Falshood will be as much in Vogue amongst the bad.

C. A gross mistake, and 'tis not the alone mistake, that the living Folks
labour under anent another World: for the Case is plainly this; as an ill
man will not stick at any Falshood, that may promote his Design, so as
little will an evil Spirit departed stand at any Thing which may make him
successfull; but in making Reports, he must tell the Truth, and nothing
but the Truth, or, Wo be to him; But besides their stated monthly,
Quarterly, and yearly meetings, or whatever they happen to be, the
departed Spirits acquainted can make a Trip to sea, and converse with one
another, yearly, daily and weekly, or oftener if they please. Thus I
answer the Question you are so much concerned about; for, my Information
was from no less than three, viz. Andrew Aikman, who attends Thurston's
Family, and James Corbet who waits upon M{r} Paton's for the Time, and was
then looking after M{rs} Sarah Paton, when shee was at your House, and an
original Emissary appointed to wait on your's.

O. At this I was much surprized, and after a little thinking, I asked him;
and is there really, Coul, an Emissary from Hell, in whatever Sense you
take it, who attends my Family?

C. Yes, you may depend upon it.

O. And what do you think is his Bussiness?

C. To divert you from your Duty, and to cause you under hand do as many
ill Things as he can, for much depends on having the Minister on their
Side.

O. Upon this I was struck with a Sort of Terrour, that I cannot account
for, nor express. In the mean Time, he said several Things that I did not
notice, but after a little, I coming to my former Presence of mind, said.
But Coul, tell me in earnest, if there be a Devil that attends my Family,
tho' invisible to us all?

C. Just as sure as you are breathing; but be not too much dejected upon
this Information; for, I tell you likewise, there is a good Angel that
attends you, who is stronger than the other.

O. Are you sure of that, Coul?

C. Yes, there is one just now riding at your Right-hand, who might as well
have been else where, for I meant you no Harm.

O. And how long has he been with me?

C. Only since we past Brunsley, but now he is gone.

O. Coul, we are just now upon Elmscleugh, and I desire to part with you,
tho' I have gained more from our Conversation together, than what perhaps
I would have done otherwise in a twelve month, I chuse rather to see you
at another Time, when you are at Leisure, and I wish it may be at as great
a Distance from Innerwick as you can.

C. Be it so, but I hope you will be as obliging to me, next Encounter, as
I have been to you this.

O. I promise you, I will, as far as it consists with my Duty to my Lord
and Master Christ Jesus; and since you oblige me so much by Information,
you may depend upon it, I will answer all the Questions you can propose,
so far as it consists with my Knowledge; but I believe you want no
Information from me.

C. I came not to be instructed by you, but I want your Help of anoyr Kind.
but more of this at next meeting, so, says he, I bid you Farewell and went
off peaceably at the Head of the Paith[2] opposite to Elmscleugh.




The Third Conference.


Upon the 9{th} of April 1722. as I was returning from Old Hamstocks, Coul
struck up with me upon the Back, at the Foot of the ruinous Inclosure
before we come to Dodds. I told him his last Conversation had proven so
acceptable to me, that I was well pleased to see him again, and that there
was a vast number of Things, which I wanted to inform my Self further of,
if he would be so good as to satisfy me.

C. Last Time we met, I refused you nothing that you asked, and now I
expect, you will refuse me nothing that I ask.

O. Nothing, Sir, that is in my Power, or, that I can with safety to my
Reputation and Character. What then are your Demands upon me?

C. All I desire is, that as you proposed that Sabbath Day, you will go to
my wife, who now possesses all my Effects, and tell her the following
Particulars, and desire her, in my Name, to rectify these Matters. 1{st}
That I was justly owing to Provost Crosby L500 Scots, and three years
Interest, but upon hearing of his Death, my good Brother, the Laird of
Chapel and I, did forge a Discharge narrating the Date of the Bond, the
Sum, and oyr Particulars, with this onerous Clause, that at that Time it
was fallen by, and could not be found, with an Obligation on the Provost's
Part, to deliver up the Bond assoon as he could hit upon it, and this
Discharge was dated three Months before the Provost's Death: and when his
only Son and Successor Andrew Crosby wrote to me concerning this Bond, I
came to him, and shewed him that Discharge, which silenced him, so that I
got my Bond without more adoe. And when I heard of Robert Kennedy's Death,
with the same Help of Chapel, I got a Bill upon him, for L190 sterline,
which I got full and compleat Payment of, and Chapel got the half. When I
was in Dumfries the Day Thomas Greer died, to whom I was owing an account
of L36 sterline, Chapel my good Brother at that Time was at London, and
not being able of my Self, being but a bad writer to get a Discharge of
the account, which I wanted exceedingly, I met accidentally with Robert
Boyd a poor Writer Lad in Dumfries. I took him to Mrs Carricks, gave him a
Bottle of wine, and told him, that I had payed Thomas Greer's Account, but
wanted a Discharge, and if he would help me to it, I would reward him. He
flew away from me in great Passion, saying he would rayr be hanged; but,
if I had a mind for these Things, I had best wait till Chapel came home.
This gave me great Trouble, fearing that what he & I had formerly done,
was no Secret. I followed Boyd to the street, made an Apology that I was
jesting, commended him for his Honesty, and took him solemnly engaged that
he should not repeat what had passed. I sent for my Cousin Barn-howrie
your good Brother, who with no Difficulty for one Guinea and an half,
undertook and performed all that I wanted, and for one Guinea more, made
me up a Discharge for L200 Scots, which I was owing to your Fayr in Law
and his friend M{r} Morehead, which Discharge I gave in to John Ewart,
when he required the Money, and he, at my Desire, produced it to you,
which you sustained. A great many of the like Instances were told, which I
cannot remember, the Person's Names, and Sums: But added he, what vexes me
more than all these, is the Injustice I did to Homer Maxwell Tenant to
Lord Nithsdale for whom I was Factor. I had borrowed 2,000{d} merks from
him, 500{d} of which he borrowed from another Hand, and I gave him my
Bond; for Reasons I contrived, I obliged him to Secrecy, he dyed within
the year, he had nine Children, and his wife had dyed a month before
himself. I came to seal up his Papers for my Lord's Security. His eldest
Daughter intreated me to look through them all, and to give her an account
what was their Stock, and what was their Debt. I very willingly undertook
it, and in going through his Papers, I put my own Bond in my Pocket. His
circumstances proved bad, and the nine Children are now starving. These
Things I desire you to represent to my Wife; take her Brother with you,
and let them be immediately rectifyed, for shee has sufficient Fund to do
it upon, and, if that were done, I think I would be easie and happy;
therefore I hope you will make no Delay.

O. After a short Pause I answered; 'tis a good Errand, Coul, that you are
sending me to do Justice to the oppressed and injured; but notwithstanding
that I see my Self among the Rest, that come in for L200{d} Scots, yet I
beg a little Time to consider on the Matter, and since I find you are as
much master of Reason _now_ and more than ever; I'l j{st} reason with you
upon the matter in it's general view; and then, w{t} Respect to the
Expediency of my being the particular messenger; and this I'le do, w{t}
all manner of Frankness. For, from what you have said, I see clearly what
your present state is, so that, I need not ask any more Questions upon
that Head, and you need not bid me take Courage, or not be afraid, for at
this moment, I am no more afraid of you, than of a new born Child.

C. Well, say on.

O. Tell me then, since such is your Agility, that in the twinkling of an
Eye, you can fly 1000{d} miles, if your Desire to do Justice to the
oppressed Persons be so great as you pretend; what is the Reason, that
you do not fly to the Coffers of some rich Jew or Banker, where is
thousands of Gold and money, invisibly lift it, and invisibly return it to
the Persons injured. Or, since your wife has sufficient Fund and more, why
can't you empty her Purse in your Hat invisibly to make the People amends?

C. Because I _cannot_.

O. If these Things were rectified, _you would be easy and happy_. I do not
at all credit that; for whatever Justice may now be done to these People,
yet the Guilt of the base Action must still belong to you.

C. Now, you think you have silenced me, and gained a notable victory,
but, I will shew you your Mistake immediately, for I cannot touch any
Man's Gold or Money by Reason of these Spirits, which are the stated
Guardians of Justice and Honesty.

O. What is that you tell me, Coul; Do not unworthy Fellows break Houses
every Night, and yet you, who can put your Self in 100{d} Shapes in a
Moment, cannot do it; what is that you say Coul?

C. 'Tis true, Sir, that among the Living, Men may find some probable way
of securing themselves, but, if Spirits departed were allowed, then no Man
would be secure, for, in that Case, every Man they had a Prejudice at,
would soon be beggared.

O. But might not you go, to the Mines of Mexico, where these little Sums
would never be missed?

C. No, for the same Reason.

O. But, Coul there is so much Treasure lost in the Sea, you can easily
dive into the Bottom of it, search that, and refund these People their
Losses, and thereby no Man is injured.

C. You are a little too forward, and incline much to banter; what I said
might satisfie you; but since it does not, I tell you further, that no
Spirits, good or bad, have any Power to take any Money or Gold: the Good
never do. And the Bad, if once in an Age they do, it is no Small Parcel
[so, in the Copy]; for if it were allowed them, then, they would be very
successful in their Bussiness, for they would never fail to gain their
Point.

O. What hinders them, said I, Coul?

C. Superior Power, that guards & governs all.

O. You have satisfied me entirely upon that Head, said I; but prithee,
Coul, what is the Reason, that you cannot go to your Wife yourself, and
tell her what you have a Mind to; I should think this a sure way to gain
your Point.

C. The Reason is, _because I cannot_.

O. That does not satisfy me Coul.

C. And that is one of the Questions that I told you long ago, I _would
not_ answer. But, if you will go, as I desired, I promise I mail give you
full satisfaction, after you have done your Bussiness. Trust me for once,
and believe me I will not disappoint you.




The Fourth Conference.


Upon the 10{th} of April 1722. coming from old-Camus upon the Post road, I
met with Coul as formerly, upon the Head of the Pathe called the _Pease_.
He asked me, if I had considered the matter he had recommended? I told
him, I had, and was in the same opinion that I was of, when we parted:
that I could not possibly undertake his Commission, unless he would give
it in Writing under his Hand. I wanted nothing but Reason to determine me,
not only in that, but all oyr Affairs of my Life. I added that the List
of his Grievances was so long, that I could not possibly remember them
w{t}out being in Writing.

I know, said he, that this is a mere Evasion: but tell me, if your
Neighbour, the Laird of Thurston will do it? I would gladly wait upon him.

O. I am sure, said I, he will not: and, if he inclined so, I would do what
I could to hinder him; for, I think, he has as little Concern in these
matters, as I. But tell me, Coul, is it not as easie for you to write your
story, as to tell it, or to ride on What is it you call him, for I have
forgotten your Horse's Name.

C. No, Sir, 'tis not, and perhaps I may convince you of it afterwards.

O. I would be glad to hear a Reason that is solid, for your not speaking
to your Wife your Self. But however, any rational Creature may see, what a
Fool I would make of my self, if I should go to Dumfries and tell your
Wife, that you had appeared to me, and told me of so many Forgeries and
Villanies which you had committed, and that shee behoved to make
Reparation. The Event might, perhaps, be, that shee would scold me: for,
as 'tis very probable, shee will be loth to part with any money shee
possesses, and therefore tell me, I was mad, or possibly might pursue me
for Calumny. How could I vindicate my Self, how should I prove, that ever
you had spoken with me? M{r} Paton, and the Rest of my Broyrn would tell
me, that it was a Devil who had appeared to me, and why should I repeat
these Things as Truth, which he that was a Lyar from the Beginning had
told me? Chapel and Barn-howrie would be upon my Top, and pursue me before
the Commissary, and every Body will look upon me, as brainsick or mad.
Therefore, I entreat you, do not insist upon sending me an April-Errand:
The Reasonableness of my Demand I leave to your Consideration, as you did
your former to mine; for I think what I ask is very just. But dropping
these matters till our next Interview; give me leave to enter upon some
more diverting Subject; and I do not know, Coul, but thro' the Information
given to me, you may do as much Service to Mankind, as the Redress of all
the Wrongs, you have mentioned would amount to, &c.


THE END.


_Elliot Stock, Paternoster Row, London._




Footnotes:

[1] The first appearance that Coul made was to Dr. Menzies's Servant at a
Time he was watering his Master's Horse. At some subsequent Appearance,
while the Lad was about the same Business, whether Coul had done him any
real Harm, or, that the Lad had fallen from his Horse thro' Fear and
Confusion, is uncertain, but so it was, that the Lad was found Dead on the
Road.

[2] A Paith in Scottish signifies a steep, and oft times rugged Road.




Transcriber's Notes:

Passages in italics are indicated by _italics_.

Superscripted letters are shown in {superscript}.






End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Laird o' Coul's Ghost, by Anonymous

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