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                              The
                        MONKEY'S FROLIC.

                        A humorous tale,
                           in verse.


                      [Publisher's device]


                            LONDON:
                      GRANT AND GRIFFITH,
                         successors to
          J. HARRIS, CORNER OF ST. PAUL'S CHURCHYARD.




                              The
                        MONKEY'S FROLIC.

                               A
                         Humorous Tale.


                      [Publisher's device]


                            LONDON:
                      GRANT AND GRIFFITH,
                         successors to
         JOHN HARRIS, CORNER OF ST. PAUL'S CHURCHYARD.




The MONKEY'S FROLIC.


  Our tale is a true one, from which may be taught
  A maxim for youth, with utility fraught;--
 _If terrors assail you, examine the cause,
  And all will be well_;--for, by NATURE'S kind laws,
  Nor Goblins nor Spectres on earth have a station,--
  These phantoms are all of ideal creation.

[Illustration]

  A _Monkey_, that comical tricks would be at,
  His frolics one morning began with the _Cat_;
  He chatter'd, as much as to say _How d' ye do?_
  And _Puss_ look'd her thanks, and politely cried _Mew_!
 _Pug_ then shook her paw, and they sat down together,
 _Puss_ washing her face, indicating wet weather.

[Illustration]

  But, mischief the _Monkey_ inclining to harbour,
  His skill he resolved now to try as a _Barber_.--
  A soap-box conveniently lay in the room,
  "Miss _Puss_," he exclaim'd, "you'll be shaved, I presume?"
  Then scraping and bowing with grin and grimace,
  Despite of resistance, he lather'd her face.

[Illustration]

  Now _Pug_ could not find either razor or knife,
  So _Puss_ ran no hazard of losing her life;--
  Yet razor or knife though they could not be had,
 _Pug_ found what the terrified _Cat_ thought as bad;
  A knife made of ivory, in use to cut paper,
  With which Barber _Pug_ now proceeded to scrape her.

[Illustration]

  But _Puss_ on a sudden deserted her station,
  Disliking (no wonder) the strange operation,
  And ran round the room without means of escaping;
  While _Pug_, still determined to give her a scraping,
  Pursued, and, regardless of struggle or prayer,
  Fast bound her, at last, to the back of a chair.

[Illustration]

  When, tucking a napkin close under her chin,
  Each mew of dismay he return'd with a grin;
  And yelling and chattering they raised such a clatter,
  That _Susan_ rush'd in to learn what was the matter;
  When _Pug_, overturning the chair midst the clack,
  Ran off, leaving _Pussy_ stretched out on her back.

[Illustration]

  The sight was to _Susan_ so curious, that faster
  She ran _out_ than _in_, to tell _Mistress_ and _Master_;
  But, when they came up, neither _Puss_ nor the _Shaver_
  Was there, to account for improper behaviour;--
  For _Pug_ had contrived, amid _Susan's_ alarms,
  To reach the house-top, with Miss _Puss_ in his arms.

[Illustration]

  Now fearing that _Pug_ or Miss _Puss_ might be maim'd,
  "Go, fetch a long ladder," the _Master_ exclaim'd;
  "And bring them down quickly both _Barber_ and _Cat_."
  "Oh, oh!" thought the _Monkey_, "I _sha'nt suffer that_."--
  The ladder was climb'd by a servant so valiant,
  But _Pug_ with loose tiles soon repulsed the assailant.

[Illustration]

  Against all manoeuvre apparently proof,
 _Pug_ chatter'd and paced to and fro on the roof,
  And fondled the _Cat_, and next, pitying her case,
  He wiped with the napkin the suds from her face;
  As nurse would a child, then he held her out _so_,
  While all the spectators kept laughing below.

[Illustration]

  Now seeing him thus to good humour inclined,
  They thought he might prove more pacific of mind,
  So mounted the ladder another assailer;
  When _Pug_, of loose tiles now perceiving a failure,
  Eluded the grasp of pursuit with a hop,
  And gained an adjacent and tall chimney-pot.

[Illustration]

  It chanced that the vent of this same chimney led
  Direct to a chamber, confined to his bed
  Where lay an old gentleman, ill with the gout,
 _And wishing some bad fate might thence drag him out!_
 _Pug_, missing his footing, 'midst vapour and fume,
  That instant with _Puss_ tumbled into the room.

[Illustration]

  Grimed over with soot, they kick'd up such a rout,
  And caper'd the sick man's apartment about,
  And chatter'd and squall'd in a manner so hideous,
  Like young imps of darkness, that, not to be tedious,
  The sufferer forgot both his gout and his prayers,
  And scamper'd, pursued by these phantoms, down stairs!

[Illustration]

  There sat in the parlour a medical man,
  And thither _pursued_ and _pursuers_ now ran;--
  And _Puss_ and the _Monkey_ grown fiercer and bolder,
  Physician and Patient seized each by his shoulder,
  Who raised such a yell, that the _chorus_ resembled
  A legion of mad-caps from Bedlam assembled!

[Illustration]

  The tumult each wonder-struck inmate alarm'd;
  At length on assistance they ventured, well arm'd,
  And entered the scene of dismay and despair,--
  When, lo! no invaders of quiet were there!
  But Doctor and Patient lay stretch'd on the floor,
  Not wotting of terror a forthcoming cure.

[Illustration]

  The incident soon was of mystery clear'd,--
  The owner of _Pug_ and _Grimalkin_ appear'd;--
  "My _Monkey_ and _Cat_ have created alarm;
  I hope," he observed, "you have not taken harm:"--
  Then cautiously peering the chamber about,
  He dragg'd, from the Chimney, both intruders out.

[Illustration]

  Alarm now gave way to good humour and fun,--
  "Much harm to my friend," said the Patient, "is done;
  Your _Ape_ pill and potion has put to the rout,
  And cured me, I thank him, at once of the _Gout_."
  He then to the _Monkey_ made reverence profound,
  Who _salam'd_ politely the company round.

[Illustration]

  The _Doctor_ a lesson thus learn'd, that, despite
  Of physic, the Gout may be cured by a _fright_:
  And, since this affair, now and then on the sly
  In similar cases same means he will try.--
  To show that no malice or envy he knew,
  He shook hands with _Pug_, and each party withdrew.




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End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Monkey's Frolic, by Anonymous

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