v1.7.0

Eight new ways to destroy the city, bringing the total to 99.

Added

• Disney (#91, Whimsical): told entirely as a kernel boot log. /dev/magic_kingdom mounts, a boat sets off on a certain small-world ride, and process sing forks through every window in the city. Then:

  • the fire department, air traffic control and the council start singing
  • the last silent human's headphone battery hits 0%
  • the world is shrunk into a snow globe and rm'd

  Kernel panic - not syncing: everyone is syncing.

• Nature (#92, Whimsical): one dandelion becomes a meadow, and the skyline becomes a row of hedges.

  • a fox runs the late-night shop, and a stag is elected mayor unopposed
  • a fungal network with opinions spreads under every street
  • every building slumps into a grassy mound

  Humanity hasn't been destroyed, just gently composted. Please do not reinstall.

• Team America (#93, Movies & Games): marionette heroes on very visible strings drop in to liberate the town square, a suspiciously foreign café, the ducks, the museum, the library, the cathedral and the mayor's office. Each one gets a slow-motion high five and a guitar riff. Another city saved.

• Brian Blessed (#94, Whimsical): a very loud, very happy man strides into town. Then:

  • HELLO! shatters every window
  • a story about a mountain makes the mountain crumble out of respect
  • MAGNIFICENT! splits the Earth neatly in half

  …WONDERFUL…

• Red Bull (#95, Whimsical): one crate in the reservoir, and by mid-afternoon the whole city has wings. Traffic jams in the clouds, a vicar triple-loops a wheelie bin, and everyone flies off past the Space Station. The Earth finally gets some rest.

• Doom Music (#96, Movies & Games): a riff with no off switch, and the street headbangs on every beat.

  • demons climb out to mosh, not to fight
  • every breakdown knocks a storey off the skyline, and the cathedral comes down on the one
  • the moon stage-dives into the sea

  Then someone yells "AGAIN!", and the world ends twice.

• Big Bird (#97, Whimsical): a very large, very friendly yellow bird teaches the town about sharing, the letter B and counting to ten. His woolly imaginary friend turns out to be real, and is standing on the cathedral. Brought to you by the letter D, and the number 0.

• Grimace (#98, Whimsical): a limited-time purple milkshake leaves the city in dramatic poses. Then a round purple friend wobbles in and turns everything purple, ending with the whole planet. Happy birthday, Earth.

Fixed

• Big words now wrap onto two lines on narrow screens instead of running off the edge.
• Big words and on-screen panels now sit below the corner buttons on phones.

Changed

• README method table and counts updated to 99 methods.