`"'Adlai's Utility ALREF,,, or "I learned nothing in a decade"

  Many thanks to stassats and pjb, two IRC legends who advised
  this clueless newbie in avoiding common bugs; and contrarian
  inspiration from pg: http://www.arclanguage.org/item?id=9568

Installation:

  Please use a specific version of the software; it does not have to
  be one that you typed yourself, nor one that is distinguishable by
  symbolic expression hash functions, although you should be able to
  explain the function to you parole officer even if it's been, say,
  a dozen decades since you last saw each other,.. and that includes
  the parole officer! If you must see parentheses somewhere, try:

  (:use-package :alref), hunt and peck a copy, do whatever compiles!

Documentation:

  ALREF should behave roughly the same as calling CL:ASSOC with any
  default arguments explicated; if a :default argument is supplied,
  this will be returned instead of NIL if no matching key is found.

  (setf (ALREF key alist) value) expands to code that should:

   - link key to value under that association list, if it's fresh;

   - change the existing association, after the key is located;

   - and forget the association, instead of storing empty links!

  It is possible to change the default values for :test, :key, and
  :default with these variables, exported from the :ALREF package:

    - ALREF:*default-alref-test*      defaults to #'CL:EQL
    - ALREF:*default-alref-key*       defaults to #'CL:IDENTITY
    - ALREF:*default-alref-default*   defaults to CL:NIL

  The defaults are chosen so that the plausible expectation is
  compliance with the standardized Common Lisp function.

Changelog:

  This is version Five Halves, the first one denoted according to
  the infinitely delayed and deeply misguided Rational Versioning,
  invariably fixed by Radical Versioning, and then, Complications.

  Previously, versions were numbered according to an underspecified,
  numerically fogging, and naively implied fixed-point numbering. It
  is now deprecated, and stating that "Production servers have been
  upgraded to conform to ALREF 2.6" is likely to result in nervous
  silences, squeaky silencers, and obscure jokes about Linux.

  Version 1.0 used (DEFUN (SETF ALREF) ...), an elementary failure.

  Version 2.0 used a setf expansion to modify the setf macro itself,
    enabling code for editing bindings of local variables by macros;
    although the common utility with-gensyms was written unportably!

  Version 2.1 sat in its own package, exporting one symbol, "ALREF".

  Version 2.2 allowed the user to customize the default key and test
    arguments and added error-checking code for unexpected behavior.

  Version 2.3 improved the customization options, renamed default
    variables, and failed to introduce a new bug to the spectators.

  Version 2.3.1 fixed the subtle bug, recently introduced to readers
  and compilers by the buggy preventative debugger's visionary dude.

  Version 2.3.2 had half of a bugfix for a more serious problem that
    came from blurring the line between data, code, and time, yknow?

  Version 2.4 dealt with the nastiness involved in fixing half a bug.

  Version 2.5 reduced unexpected interaction between the operator and
  the compiler, liable to occur during a recursive setf expansion.

LEGAL

   ... aka COPYING, CONDUCT, COARSEPRINT, i.e.: READ THIS IF NO ELSE!

  Feel free to copy this code and use it in your projects; if you are
  required to provide documentation, PLEASE: leave monographs, emoji,
  and autobiographies outside of actual CL:DOCUMENTATION strings, OK?

  The use of a rhetorical question to end the legally unrequired junk
  serves to imply, to a reader who consents by reading further, that,
  should they actually attempt to interrogate me by any method other
  than spoken conversation at ranges of fewer than than five metres,
  they are quite likely to receive lots of free information, along
  with complimentary insults, complementary lessons, and trailing
  newlines, for unblocked devices neither burn out, nor fade away.

  If you have improvements to the code or find any bugs, I'm often on
  Freenode IRC, occasionally TripSit, often angry and rarely not afk.

Qua?

  Non, djnneparlpathd'autre langues; rien de nichts; mostly, English.

  If you are confused as to why I spend time maintaining this README
  for a function that I've neither called myself, nor reimplemented,
  in the decade during which I learned absolutely nothing... there
  are no palatable summaries, although you should at least be able
  to find a fistful of aphorisms, a compass, and possibly even a
  hyperlink to the hyperspec within this excellent document:

   https://www.puercopop.com/In-Defense-of-the-Alist.html