feat(remix): Migrate sendDefaultPii to dataCollection

[chargome]

Replaces all sendDefaultPii usage in the Remix package with the new dataCollection option:

• instrumentServer.ts: Passes client.getDataCollectionOptions() to httpHeadersToSpanAttributes
• errors.ts: Gates action form data capture on dataCollection.httpBodies.includes('incomingRequest')
• opentelemetry.ts: Gates OTel form data attributes on dataCollection.httpBodies.includes('incomingRequest')

The Remix-specific captureActionFormDataKeys option is preserved — only the gating mechanism changes.

closes #20933

[chargome]

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[cursor]

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