"What if we just... didn't hire a frontend developer?" — someone who shipped this to production
This website has zero static content. No HTML files. No CSS files. No React. No Tailwind. No node_modules the size of a black hole. Every single page — including /docs/, including /about, including /the-great-spaghetti-incident-of-2019 — is generated in real-time by an LLM that thinks it's an unhinged web designer from 1999 who time-traveled to the future.
Every. Single. Request. Fresh HTML. Fresh CSS. Marquees. Comic Sans. Gradients that would make your eyes bleed. No two page loads will ever be the same. That page you just saw? Gone forever. Like tears in rain.
| Layer | Technology |
|---|---|
| Runtime | Vercel Edge Functions (free tier, because we have standards) |
| LLM | Whatever free model on OpenRouter isn't rate-limiting us right now |
| Frontend | LMAO |
| CSS Framework | The AI's unmedicated imagination |
| Build Step | There is no build step. There is nothing to build. We are free. |
| Bundle Size | 0 bytes. The bundle is a lie. |
| Tests | We test in production. Every visitor is a QA engineer. |
| CI/CD | Push and pray |
| Documentation | You're looking at it. Also the /docs/ page, which is also hallucinated. |
/— A homepage. Different every time. Links to pages that don't exist yet but will when you click them./docs/— A docs page that is ALSO generated by the LLM. It streams in like you're watching someone type in a terminal from 1987. The docs explain the site. The docs are the site. It's docs all the way down./literally/anything/you/want— Go ahead. Make up a URL. It'll generate a page for it./ceo/of/fonts./why/is/there/a/platypus./grandmas-secret-recipe-for-world-domination. All valid. All cursed.
| Param | What it does |
|---|---|
?long=true |
Uses a bigger, slower model. Pages take longer but are more unhinged. |
?model=some/model-name |
BYOM — Bring Your Own Model. Use any model on OpenRouter. |
?key=sk-or-v1-xxx |
BYOK — Bring Your Own Key. For when the free tier has had enough of you. |
- A request comes in. Any request. Any path.
- A Vercel Edge Function catches it like a net catches a confused bird.
- The URL path gets sent to a free LLM on OpenRouter with a system prompt telling it to be a 90s web designer who's lost their mind.
- The LLM generates a complete
<!DOCTYPE html>page with inline CSS. Streaming. Live. - The browser renders this fresh-from-the-oven HTML as it arrives.
- The page will never exist again. It is ephemeral. It is art. It is a cry for help.
┌──────────┐ ┌─────────────────┐ ┌──────────────┐
│ Browser │────▶│ Vercel Edge Fn │────▶│ OpenRouter │
│ (victim) │◀────│ (the middleman) │◀────│ (the brain) │
└──────────┘ └─────────────────┘ └──────────────┘
│
▼
┌──────────────┐
│ ???????? │
│ (the HTML) │
└──────────────┘
Q: Is this a joke? A: It's deployed to production, so no.
Q: Why? A: We don't need no web dev.
Q: What if the LLM generates something broken? A: Then you get to see something broken. Refresh and it'll be different broken. Or maybe beautiful. That's the magic.
Q: Is this secure? A: The API key is server-side. The LLM is told not to generate JavaScript. If it does anyway, well, that's between you and your browser.
Q: How much does this cost to run? A: $0. Vercel free tier + OpenRouter free models. We are running a production website on hopes, dreams, and other people's GPUs.
Q: Can I actually deploy this myself? A: Yes, unfortunately.
Q: Should I use this in production? A: We already did. You're looking at it. The horse has left the barn. The barn is on fire. The fire is also generated by an LLM.
Q: What happens if all the free models go down? A: Then the website doesn't exist. Which, philosophically, was always true.
Q: Is this the future of web development? A: God I hope not.
Built with no frameworks, no dependencies, no dignity, and no regrets.