W Lang

Esoteric language based off of Genz slang cuz why not?

Inspiration

We love diversity, but we only have two types of developers!

1. The C developer
   • Can move mountains
   • Packs features into a single commit, not 10+
   • Deserves their job
2. The Python Bootcamper
   • Best friend is the clipboard
   • Dies without ChatGPT
   • Doesn't understand compilers

Because of this, we introduce a third category to the catalog of developers! Introducing W, the language of the future!

W lets Gen Z to simply speak in their natural language and become a developer! As the younger Gen Zs get influenced by brain rot, we include them by using simple words like cap, sus, and npc, empowering the next generation to code with minimal brain activity!

Take the W, not the L!

But, why W be takin the W's?

• Never crash again! Just use the #idgaf tag on your function!
• Why use booleans when we have nocap and cap instead?
• Never use switch to check your case! Use vibe checks instead!
• Need to check truthiness/falsiness? Use smol (<), thicc (>), be (==), be special (!==) instead!
• Want an empty pointer that acts like any value? Use the stuf keyword instead!
• We all hated functions in school, so we made side_quests instead!
• TF is a string? We just use word here.
• Tests not passing? Make them all turn green with the #yolo and #idgaf tags!
• Something evaluating to false? Detect it with the sus operator!
• Anyone using main()? Start using main_character, boomer!
• In tutorial hell dying over if/else? We got you with easy-to-understand cuz, frick, and idgaf keywords!
• Find yourself using /* and */ to knock out shitcode? Use nah, stop that and continue here!
• Need a loop? Just spawn an NPC instead with spawn npc called bob rn to do your bidding!
• Proper error handling! Instead of Result<T>, we use W's and L's! (cuz side_quest take L, say "side quest failed!")
• At W, we decide to have a different flavor just for the stanley girls! Now includes words like slayy, yass, queen, and ick!

Frickin awesome examples

You a boomer or millenial? Check out our WSV english translation (W Standard Version) here

1. How to eliminate Brute Force attacks with W Lang!

real_password be "bussin"

side_quest check_password
    grab password: word

    cuz password be real_password,
        say "nocap"
    frick password be sus
        say "i call cap"
    idgaf
        say "frick. kms"
end side_quest

main_character do side_quest

2. How to crash your friend's computer with W Lang!

side_quest crash_computer
    system_vibe: word

    vibe_check on system_vibe:
        cuz system_vibe be "linux", 
            say "sys too lit to quit fam!"
        frick system_vibe be "wsl",
            say "best of both?",
        frick system_vibe be "dead",
            say "prolly was a mac"
        idgaf
            say "windows 💀"
            pls initiate_crash_sequence rn
end side_quest

main_character do side_quest

3. How to calculate fibonacci of 10!

side_quest fib
    grab pp: stuf

    cuz pp smol 2,
        say "nah, stop that"
        fml "its too smol"
    
    first be 0
    second be 1
    length be 2
    next be 0

    spawn npc bob
        bob do while length < pp
        next be first + second

        first be second
        second be next

        index be index + 1

end side_quest

main_character do side_quest and n be 10

This is a joke if you want me to make this real, leave an issue telling me to make it real