github-roast 🔥

Enter a GitHub username. Receive judgment.

Data-driven roasts built from your own public GitHub activity. The more questionable your commit history, the funnier this gets.

Installation

npm install -g github-roast

Or run directly with npx:

npx github-roast torvalds

Usage

github-roast <username>

github-roast octocat
github-roast torvalds
github-roast your-coworker-who-pushes-to-main

Optional: GitHub Token

Without a token you get 60 requests/hour. With one, 5000.

GITHUB_TOKEN=ghp_yourtoken github-roast USERNAME

Example Output

╔══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╗
║          GITHUB ROAST: @OCTOCAT                          ║
╚══════════════════════════════════════════════════════════╝

── EVIDENCE COLLECTED ──────────────────────────────────────
  Name          : The Octocat
  Account age   : 192 months (joined 2010)
  Public repos  : 8 (8 original, 0 forked)
  Total stars   : 2847
  Followers     : 18203 | Following: 9
  Languages     : Ruby, HTML, CSS, Shell
  Top language  : Ruby
  Peak activity : 2 PM

── THE ROAST ────────────────────────────────────────────────

🔥 Been on GitHub since 2010. 8 original repos. You've had a Netflix
   account longer than this and produced more content.

🔥 No bio. We respect the silence. We do not respect the emptiness.

🔥 No website. No blog. Not even a dead Substack. In this economy?
   Are you even a real developer or just vibes?

── ROASTABILITY SCORE ───────────────────────────────────────
  ████░░░░░░ 4/10
  Verdict: Decent. The mediocrity is the joke.

────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────
This roast was powered by your own public data.
You did this to yourself.
────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────

What It Analyzes

• Follower ratio — the social rejection math
• Language distribution — are you committed or scattered?
• Stars vs repo count — quantity vs quality
• Account age vs output — years on GitHub, anything to show for it?
• Bio content — "passionate developer" detected
• Commit timing — 3 AM pushes tell a story
• Repo binge days — 6 repos in one day is a crisis, not productivity
• Activity gaps — what happened in March 2023?

What It Does NOT Do

• Access private repos or data
• Use anything beyond GitHub's public API
• Store or log any user data
• Actually hurt your feelings (that's on you)

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No humans were harmed. Just their ego.

Built with Node.js 18+, zero dependencies, and a healthy disrespect for comfort zones.