W++ Ingot CLI v2.0.0-beta.1.5

🦥 W++ v2 — Beta 1.5 ("The Lazy Await")

Hey there, brave chaos-enjoyer 👋

You actually made it to Beta 1.5. Impressive — that means you’ve survived every stack underflow, GC panic, and parser tantrum so far.
So what’s new this time? Let’s dive into the madness:

🌐 New Features & Shenanigans

• async / await Support (yes, really!)
  W++ now comes with a real runtime scheduler.
  Your coroutines can finally sleep peacefully… until they wake up and segfault.

🕒 That’s literally it

Budget cuts hit hard — our lead sloth developer (me) is going on vacation.
But fear not: the moment I’m back, chaos will resume at full speed.
Expect new bugs disguised as features and features that feel like bugs.

⚠️ Known “Features”

• async sometimes deadlocks for no reason.
• await occasionally doesn’t.
• The runtime scheduler might start a union strike.
  Basically, everything is functioning — in the same way a cat functions when you tell it not to knock over a glass.

🪟 Windows Notice

Windows binaries are currently unavailable — LLVM and Windows are still not on speaking terms.
Negotiations are ongoing, but for now, peace talks have broken down at the linker table.

💌 Final Words

Enjoy the update, embrace the absurdity, and remember:
W++ doesn’t crash — it dramatically rage-quits.

🦥 Stay chaotic,
— Ofek Bickel