[meta] Update database-centric libraries

[miketheman]

We've got newer libraries to look at for database accesses, and need a sane workflow to get us to the finish line.

Here's an outline of execution:

• Upgrade to latest SQLAlchemy 1.4.x - done - we're on 1.14.47
• Run tests with SQLALCHEMY_WARN_20=1 to surface all Deprecation warnings, resolve those post-haste
  • chore: address sqlalchemy warnings #13511
  • refactor: remove joinedload of User #13784
  • refactor: SQLAlchemy deprecations #13785
  • refactor: replace current windowed query #13845
  • chore: remove unnecessary Load #13895
• Set future=True on sessionmaker & create_engine and run tests
  • Fails on session passing in Event.ip_address magic, which we should probably remove after every Event has a related IPAddress (see feat: add ip address backfill cli command #13804 feat(cli): add input to select event type #13823 refactor: remove calls to ip_address_string #13842)
  • Fails on test case. Refactor: test: refactor to remove user data from test #13889
• Upgrade to SQLalchemy 2.0.16 chore(deps): upgrade sqlalchemy #13929
  • Nits found while working on SQLAlchemy 2.0 upgrade #13942
  • Read https://docs.sqlalchemy.org/en/20/changelog/migration_20.html
  • Replace sqlalchemy-citext as it's no longer needed, there's a built-in https://docs.sqlalchemy.org/en/20/dialects/postgresql.html#sqlalchemy.dialects.postgresql.CITEXT
  • fix: update migrations code for sqlalchemy 2.0 #13948
  • explicitly send query as text in _health #13950
• Upgrade psycopg3 - see Upgrade from psycopg2 to psycopg3 #10742
• Upgrade pytest-postgresql to 5.x
• Celebrate!

[miketheman]

As of today, we've updated all the libraries and associated code to make them work.

There's still outstanding work to convert to SQLAlchemy 2.0 ORM PEP-484 support, but that can be completed outside this work.

Major kudos to @di, @ewdurbin , @dstufft for all their work on making this happen!